#but yeah this is not a personal attack on you or your opinions I promis

[styrofauxm]

I wanna talk about Eternals....

Okay. So. I have...opinions. I'm putting them in a non-cronological, non-sequential, non-ranked numbered list for your enjoyment (or anger, or other emotion, or lack of emotion)

(also spoilers for Eternals)

(also it is ludicrously long)

1. The plot was great. I loved it

2. The pacing was off. There were parts where it flowed well, parts where it felt stagnant, and parts where it felt rushed

3. The character relationships were great...until they weren't. For the first half of the movie, I loved the way they interacted. It felt natural and made sense for a bunch of people who have known each other for ~7000 years (I'll come back to that "about). BUT then the writers started saying what those relationships were explicitly. And apparently I was wrong about 90% of them. Which was really, really, really annoying

and yeah sure I can be wrong. That's not the issue. The issue is that they didn't develop the relationships they wanted to, so instead of letting that flow naturally, they named the relationships in a half-baked effort to fix it. (yes that is all opinion-based and conjecture. please take it with a grain of salt. Or five). (Major exceptions being Phastos and his husband and Gilgamesh and Thena, because those were introduced explicitly, not built up ambiguously then made to seem like they changed)

4. I am still confused about the time frame. Was it 7000 years on earth? Was it 7000 years since they split? How long ago did Sersi and Ikarus break up? Was it 5000 years in or was it 6000 (based on Sprite's century comment)? That was frustrating and needed to be cleared up

5. The characterization of each character? Impeccable. Except for Sprite. But still mostly amazing. I tend to be more invested in plot that characters but I AM INVESTED IN THESE CHARACTERS. I am eagerly awaiting what will happen to them. I am THEORIZING. I am OVER ANALYZING. Basically, stellar characterization, mostly consistent characterization, 9.9/10

6. So. Sprite. She...uh...yeah. Sprite in the first 4/5th of the movie and Sprite in the last 5th of the movie felt like different characters. Her "crush" on Ikarus felt like it came out of nowhere (another reason I was frustrated they explicitly stated the relationships). Her frustration with not being able to grow up is clear from the first scene, but the way she ACTS seems to fundamentally shift, even though her motivation remains the same

7. Ikarus's character development In Particular was great. (turn away now if you really don't want to be spoiled but read this far anyway). I just thought he had main character syndrome or something for the whole thing. But No! He's actually the epitomy of an asshole cishet white man. You've got the "obsessed with 'protecting' women who are perfectly capable and dismissing their valid complaints that they're competent", you've got the "cannot accept personal error or fault", and you've got "just kind of a jerk to people for no apparent reason". Basically he was a good final villain particularly because those types of characters tend to be main characters and paint those attitudes as normal

8. Okay. hear me out here please. But if the characters were there close to the dawn of human civilizations, and they had accents that didn't exist yet, does that mean they just kind of stayed with specific groups of people until those people adopted the accent of that particular Eternal? Was it a respect thing? I don't know but this is basically canon to me now

9. A few weeks before it came out, my friend was super happy that they were finally having a Latin American superhero in a mainstream marvel movie. She was legitimately really excited for what they were going to do with Ajak's character. And then she was killed off with barely any screen time as compared to the others. Which I noticed when watching and gave me an icky feeling (I like to think I would have noticed if we hadn't had that conversation before, but in all honesty, I probably wouldn't have). However, after watching, my friend (same person) pointed out to me that they had a white man kill her, right after they condemned the genocide committed by white people in the Americas. Which to her was not great. (I am really just relaying her opinion there but I think its valid, and it should be said (and she doesn't have public social media accounts)). (Also, random person, I agree that that does not take away from the other GOOD representation, that is not what I am saying)

10. Kingo kind of just disappeared? Like where did he go? Why were only Sprite and Ikarus mentioned as having joined the unimind? He was my second favorite character (after Gilgamesh) and he just wasn't there for the climax why? IDK that just bothered me

11. this is a blank spot for me to reserve more opinions that I was thinking of when I started writing 20 minutes ago so have since forgot

#eternals #marvel eternals #eternals spoilers #caps #PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE keep in mind that this is just opinion #honestly if I get a response saying my OPINION is wrong I'm just going to block you #feel free to disagree and say so loudly #but that is also your equally unfactually based opinion #if you point out things in the movie to try to disprove my opinion I will also block you #in fact here is my preemptive response: the movie should have made it clearer if I didn't notice that or get that vibe #I had this argument with my sibling already and I'm really not interested bc that felt really shitty #(it wasn't their fault they didn't realize what they were saying and neither did I for a while and we worked it out... #...and then we spent an hour and a half talking about warrior cats bc this is what our lives have come to) #but yeah this is not a personal attack on you or your opinions I promis #also with the sprite thing I might elaborate thats just a super condensed version of my thoughts