#but then he made a stupid bet with his friends that he could lick poison off a dagger

[littledreamling]

I want to write a fic about Dream finding out* about all of the stupid things Hob has done that would 100% kill any other person (drinking lava, jumping off of cliffs, attempting to climb impossible heights, etc) when he found out he couldn’t die

because let’s be honest, it doesn’t matter who you are, if you’re granted immortality, the first thing any human is going to do is some fatally stupid shit and Hob wouldn’t be exempt from this. He wouldn’t do it out of any suicidal intent, he would do it to fully experience everything the world has to offer

*bonus points if Hob isn’t the one to tell him, Death is and Dream spends the entire time alternating between being impressed and glaring at Hob who’s standing in the corner wishing he was literally anywhere else

#Dream: ‘Hob that’s not what immortality should be used for’ #they’re all sitting in Hob’s flat drinking and reminiscing #and then Death brings up that one time that Hob drank a random chemical in his university’s chemistry lab #a chemical that definitely would’ve killed anyone else #and suddenly Dream is SHOCKED but Death assures him that it isn’t the first time Hob has abused his immortality #and Hob is silently screaming at her to shut up with his eyes #but they’re all pretty deep in their cups so Death starts way back at the beginning #when Hob went to war and first realized that his stab wounds always healed #that no amount of blood loss would put him in the grave #and at first he didn’t want to test it or push it #but then he made a stupid bet with his friends that he could lick poison off a dagger #and the stomachache wasn’t worth it but it also didn’t kill him #he had to make up some lie about poison tolerance or how it was fake poison so he didn’t blow his cover #after that he got more cautious but he’s definitely done some stupid shit over the years just because he could #he’s only human after all #we’ve all seen a pretty rock and wanted to eat it #and you KNOW he ate a tide pod #just because he could #the sandman #sandman netflix #hob gadling #dream of the endless #morpheus #dreamling #death of the endless