#but then I got jealous (per say) of people who had big friendgroups and were 'popular' etc and wanted to become 'somebody'

[melit0n]

"The more that I grow, the more that I've come to know; it's hard to be someone and it hurts to be nobody."

#I'm thinking about making a personal tag for all the music I post #something like 'Mel's Mixtape'? I feel like I've already seen that somewhere though so I don't wanna be copying anyone #if anybody has any ideas let me know! #+ that lyric gutter punched me when I first listened to COAP #(bit of a vent/rant incoming so nobody feel pressured to read) #I've spent the majority of my life with anxiety (especially social anxiety) and depression #so I got stuck on the idea of being a 'nobody'; a person you never even notice just drifting through It All #but then I got jealous (per say) of people who had big friendgroups and were 'popular' etc and wanted to become 'somebody' #a person maybe even in the public eye #so I spent years trying to make myself into someone I wasn't and spent the whole time suffering #and eventually people realised I was not what I wanted to be (I wasn't like *them* in that sense) and they spent their days making sure -> #I knew it #so yeah #it is hard to be someone but it hurts to be nobody #even so I've found myself a good middle spot with a few friends who know me for *me* a good major and a lot of lovely moots #I ain't someone but I ain't nobody either <3 #mel's thoughs #spotify #half•alive #half alive #conditions of a punk #coap #nobody (song) #melitunes