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#but perfect excuse for her to live: max did get some of the brotherhood to come and they brought stimpacks and other medical supplies
savingthrcw · 1 month
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@bucketofdrugs sent: kissing your lover because you believe you're going to die.
The funny thing about knowing you were about to die, while everyone around you still had no idea of what was about to happen, was that it gave you time. Or at least it made her feel like time had slowed down, and gave her time to look at Cooper, at her violent, protective, rude, funny, ghoul who had not only accompanied her far longer than he needed to, but had kept her safe - and yes, sometimes held her at night, even if they hadn't talked about that - and she knew she couldn't watch him die. It was the one thing she just would not accept in this hard but free life. She couldn't lose him here, she couldn't take him away from his own mission either. But they were out of stimpacks, their temporary comrades were also pinned down, Dane and Max upstairs, the rest of the Brotherhood was late, the others who had joined them when she has asked her to pay her back for her past help were fighting the robots, so it was up to her, the only one with high enough science skills. It was up to her to get to the console, and she was never going to see Cooper again, because running away wasn't an option to her. "Dang, this is a sticky situation," she piped up, looking at the door that would lead her to the console room. "...'Waste not', right, Coop?" Protected by the pillar they were using as a barrier from the bullets, Lucy brought a hand to his shoulder to pull him close and pressed her lips against his. Besides him being hot, it just felt like kissing a man; a man who made her feel confusing, positive but distressing things, and Lucy took the little time she had left to allow those feelings to be there, her lips moving slowly but with the hunger of someone who wasn't going to be having a second one, and her hand gently touching the rough skin of his cheek. Enough.
She pulled back, licked her lips and gave him a wide smile, eyes sparkling with affection and unshed tears. No time to think or talk more, she used all her strength and speed to fling herself towards the door, hearing people yell for her; a few bullets did hit her, but she still kept on running and stumbling until she grabbed the console and started typing it. She didn't have the passkey to disarm the security system, and that meant that before hitting enter she had what felt like a spear go through her chest, but she still managed to press the key, and reprogram all the robots, before dropping to the ground, blood pouring from her fast. But it was okay. Vault Tec had lost control of the town, her friends were alive... Cooper was going to stay relatively alive too. He'd know what to do without her, he'd be fine. She wished she had kissed him sooner.
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Holiday Headcanons
A collection of headcanons for the Fallout 4 Companions + Faction Leaders!
ADA
Jackson made it a point to make sure that ADA understood the holidays all of them but she still has questions and will make inquiries to that effect. She's respectful about it.
She doesn't quite get the concept behind some of them, and not all of the settlers are as happy to get her holiday presents (junk, of course!) as the Sole Survivor is, but she really puts her metaphorical heart into it. One of the gifts she manages to find and give Sole is one massive knot of Christmas lights, which she will offer to assist in disentangling.
Subsequently, a gigantic ball of lights is shoved onto a traffic cone as the Christmas tree. No one can get those things untangled.
Best gift: Junk
Cait
Never really had fond memories about the holidays due to her upbringing. 
Still, she's happy for the excuse to knock back a couple of extra pints.
And will absolutely go out of her way to pick up a gift or two for Sole once made aware that it's a tradition, even though she doesn't celebrate herself.
Of course, she swears it's just something she ran into, nothin' too special, but Sole knows better.
If Sole manages to get enough drinks into Cait to actually get her a little wobbly, she may allow a more spiritual conversation about her own beliefs of which she apparently has many.
Best Gift: Drinks, fun
Codsworth
Decorates everything. Everywhere. For every holiday. Tastefully, of course.
Which brings up some questions. Where did he find so much garland? Are the candles in that menorah *new*? Is that an actual, live turkey?
A butler has his secrets, ma'am/sir.
And his regrets. He laments that he never had more time to spend holidays with young Shaun and the Mister/Missus, of course, but also that he cannot do more for Sole now. Holidays are meant to be a day spent with your family, the one gift he cannot give. 
He'll try to lighten the mood with a joke about needing to clean up after holiday feasts, but Sole can tell he's still hurting.
Even if the Sole Survivor is too bitter or angry around the holidays to celebrate, Codsworth will still try to find a small act to try to make the day pass easier.
Best Gift: A "holiday" event as a family
Curie
Curie has loads of questions even more than ADA  and the enthusiasm to try absolutely every old tradition. She considers the emotional enjoyment from holidays every bit as important as regular exercise and a normal diet! She encourages Sole to at least try to take part in a vacation during these days. 
She also absolutely adores any and all decorations and, while shy, is very curious to learn any and all songs and how to sing them. Of course, she also cares very much for their cultural significance and origins and would adore a book regarding such topics, though it isn't quite her field of expertise.  
New Years' Eve, especially, is a delight to Curie. She takes her resolution very seriously and is exasperated to discover most people don't. 
Best gift: Knowledge!
Danse
Before Blind Betrayal, Danse insists that the Brotherhood of Steel has more important things to attend to than holiday shenanigans and revelry, but does acknowledge that they are important for squad morale, and so will engage in such activities for their benefit. 
It's actually super easy to rope him into most of the holiday stuff, though he is not at all amused to have his power armor decorated for the occasion. 
Despite his words he doesn't exactly take off the paint, though lights will have to go. For safety reasons. 
After Blind Betrayal, grows very melancholic around the holidays. Will tell stories about Rhys's postNew Years' hangovers or, more fondly, about Haylen's talent with hand-carving dreidels. 
If they're still alive, Sole can go see Haylen to get a gift for Danse, though it's never explicitly stated as such. There's a moment of tension as they realize Rhys has overheard their conversation, but after staring at them for a long moment he makes it a point to purposely misconstrue their talk as something entirely unrelated, giving them an out. 
They all know. 
When Sole makes touching gestures for Danse, especially for the holidays, he never has the words to express how it makes him feel. This is a good way to get a very intense hug. This is also a very good way to collapse a lung, so make sure he's out of the Power Armor first. 
Best Gift: Reassurance
Deacon
Takes great pride in claiming he is of the heritage or religion to celebrate every holiday as it comes up, inexplicably has all of the information and customs down to celebrate them accurately. 
Especially enjoys singing carols offkey in the HQ because he knows it gets on Glory's nerves.
She mostly seems to be faking the exasperation, though, so it just seems to be a thing with them. 
Will sometimes hum the same songs while out with Sole, but seems a little more in his own head when he does so.
Makes it a point to celebrate Sole's preferred holidays in whatever manner they would and to rope them into it under the guise of them doing *him* a favor, not the other way around.
By the time they've maxed out his affinity, Sole can pretty clearly tell that Deacon just doesn't want to be alone and thinking of his past on these days. He'll never outright say it, but he's grateful when they let him stick around.
When it comes to group celebrations, however, he has a habit of sticking to the edges of the crowd, if he shows up at all. It's a good place to gather intel, he says, but it's just more of him separating himself from others to avoid getting hurt.
At a high enough affinity and having spent the holiday with Deacon, Sole might get a brief but serious conversation in which Deacon thanks them again for putting up with his shit. It means a lot. Seriously...And then he defuses the tension by trying to deflect their response into a joke. 
Gives Sole a gift by initially insisting it's something they just dropped with a straight face, especially if it's something they've never seen or couldn't have possibly been carrying. 
Best Gift: Feigned Ignorance
Dogmeat
Has no idea what is going on, is extra happy to have more people around.
And the attention! So much attention! And kids to play with!
Loves the extra food, too.
And yet, still seems to find the loneliest people at the party to hang around them at their lowest points of the night. 
Is a good boy.
Best Gift: Attention!
Hancock
Gets even more self-destructive around the holidays, probably due to a mixture of guilt and the betrayal from his "brother's" actions. 
Will escalate until the holidays are either over or Sole talks him out of it, at which point he'll go into a rant and manage to work out his feelings through that.
There's a revelation in there somewhere, and the chance to talk about moving forward instead of looking back. Sole can encourage Hancock in considering the people of Goodneighbor and Sole themselves as his new, weird family, and he's grateful for the talk.
With that behind them, of course, he's now down to party without the motives of just getting through it. 
Best Gift: Mentats, a comforting talk
Longfellow
Makes a lot of dismissive remarks about the holidays, avoids people and towns during them...
But also seems to fiddle a ribbon in his pocket a lot. The hairpiece of a long-lost child, perhaps?
He won't answer questions about it, only snorts or gruffly tells Sole they have better things to do. 
Still, he doesn't mind some time in a bar or together, away from everyone else, to just slow down and reminisce. 
Best Gift: Oddly enough, something small and kind of silly, like an old holiday-themed keychain or something. He snorts at it, but Sole never sees him without it.
MacCready
Pretends he didn't even know the holidays were around. Explains why he's so darn cold. 
But he totally knew, he's been giving Daisy all kinds of stuff to send back to Duncan, and sulks when he thinks Sole isn't looking.
If the cure has already been found and sent along to Duncan, Sole can arrange for a special trip and explain to MacCready that there's something they really, really need outside of the Commonwealth, and they don't trust anyone else to have their back.
It's kind of like taking a puppy to the park; it doesn't fully sink in until he recognizes where they are, and then he's all excitement and has no idea what to do with himself.
Bringing him home is as much a gift to Duncan as it is to MacCready.
Best Gift: Getting to see Duncan again.
Nick Valentine
Swears all he needs for the holidays is for things to stay calm for a few minutes, but we all know how that works out, don't we. 
But he makes it a point to drop back by Diamond City more than usual, to check on everyone and make sure their days are going well. 
Gets torn between wanting to solve his cases faster to help out those that need the emotional lift and actually taking time off so Ellie isn't too alone for the holidays. 
Probably gets a dramatic and thematic case just before the holidays that Sole can help him with. It kind of plays out like a Christmas movie, and Nick clearly takes a lot of pride in it.
Best Gift: Repairs made to his torn-up trenchcoat and hat. He doesn't want new ones, of course, but if they were sewn and patched up, it'd mean a lot to him.
Piper
Goes out of her way to make sure everything is perfect for Nat, even though Nat's getting to the age where she isn't quite as into the holidays and wants to do her own thing.
Piper wants to be cool and let it slide, but she's also hurt because she has issues dealing with the fact that Nat is growing up. By the end of it, of course, Nat is at least willing to have their traditional family dinner of mostly candy and playing mad libs in exchange for Piper accepting that she doesn't want to spend the whole day home. Sole is invited.
Piper also gets a gift for Sole, and though it isn't something Sole thought they wanted, it turns out it's something they needed. She's observant like that.
Best Gift: A good holiday for Nat (and maybe a killer frontpage story!)
Porter Gage
Swears up and down the holidays are bullshit, just like the whole damn park. If you can figure out how to turn them to the Raiders' advantage too, by all means, but until then he just wants to focus on expanding your operation and keeping things running smoothly.
Not that anyone can keep the Pack, Operatives, or Disciples form their own celebrations during the holidays. Porter looks especially tired this time of year.
There's probably a quest for keeping them under control or dealing with the fallout of them getting too crazy. 
Best Gift: He says it's shit running smoothly, but the best gift is actually something utterly saccharine that he initially scoffs at. Maybe a specially-modified gun just for him, or a cheesy holiday card made out of a collage of NukaWorld ads. He'll say something to the effect of "You goin' soft on me, boss?" but like Longfellow, he always seems to have it on him.
Not that you'll ever see it outside of him trying to sell it to you alongside everything else you've given him.
Preston Garvey
Works himself to the bone trying to make sure everyone can at least enjoy the simple pleasure of a safe sleep over the holidays. Will also ask Sole to help him unite families and bring kids gifts. 
Will absolutely push himself too hard and fall asleep the moment he sits down at a bar or similar establishment for a break.
Somehow ends up surrounded by gifts from all the settlers, needs help unburying himself from gifted blankets and coats put on him while he slept. Is very embarrassed by it, also unsure as to whether or not it's rude to redistribute the gifts to the settlers than need them.
Still, can be caught just smiling at all of the celebrations, so proud to have helped Sole in rebuilding the Commonwealth and giving people something to celebrate.
Best Gift: Safe settlements, happy settlers, a mandatory break.
Strong
Very confused.
Wants to fight Santa. And Krampus. And the Easter Bunny. 
You know, to prove himself Strong and probably absorb their power through their defeat.
Will camp out all Christmas night, falls asleep, is infuriated to wake up to Santa's gifts. He'll catch Santa next year, for sure.
Best Gift: Fistfight with someone in a mall Santa outfit. It'll ultimately prove disappointing, but at least he'll move on.
X6-88
Is very dismissive and cold in regards to the concept of the holidays, remarks that they greatly reduce productivity. 
But if he notices a particularly distraught Sole, will instead remark that not celebrating them appears to be negatively affecting their efficacy. Recommends they get their affairs in order and then return when they can focus, which is horribly phrasing for what is actually supposed to be "hey, go take a break". 
Eats SO many cookies and snack cakes when no one is looking (he thinks).
Deacon was totally looking, and is absolutely going to make a bunch of very casual remarks about how *everyone* at the party must be loving them with how many of them are missing.
Surprisingly, X6 gets Sole a gift that isn't totally utilitarian. He makes no affectionate remarks to accompany it, only gives it to them with no fanfare and then continues about his work. It kind of comes across as a gift of obligation, but no one told him he needed to. 
Best Gift: Snack Cakes, dedication to your work
Bonus:
Desdemona
Makes it a point to arrange for a small but quiet celebration for the Railroad to ease internal tension, though it mostly seems to be because it's a tradition. Tinker Tom makes a cake everyone is scared to eat, Deacon brings eggnog no one questions the origins of, and Glory raises morale by being a badass (which is, you know, what Glory always does). 
Des will also take the time to insist everyone take a moment of silence to acknowledge the agents they've lost over the years, and then to look at the progress they've made and how proud those agents would be of them now. 
Des isn't one of the ones that end up sleeping off the nog, but does Team Mom it up by making sure all of her agents are safe and comfortably tucked away when they do.  
Best Gift: Taking the time to thank her for the work she's done. She's surprised, but touched.
"Father"
Respects the Institute's traditions for holidays, which mostly seems to involve briefly acknowledging them before going back to work.
But can also be caught staring out his window. If caught, will clear his throat and attempt to ask about something else but if pressed, can be made to admit that he was reflecting on his life and how holidays might have been if things had gone differently. If the war had never started, if the other parent had survived, if they'd been brought out with him...Even if he'd taken the time to make a family of his own.
Not that he ever wanted to get married or have kids, but it's hard not to wonder what it might have been like around the holidays even for him, and especially in a place like the Insitute where everyone seems to have an invisible barrier keeping them apart from one another. 
May make the gesture of giving Sole his baby blanket, which he has held onto all these years. 
Best Gift: "World's Best Father" mug. Doesn't laugh, but privately puts it up alongside his awards just as proudly as any of the others because of who it's from.
Maxson
Has fond memories of the holidays as a child, of venturing out with Sarah and getting to speak to Elder Lyons at dinner. 
Drinks heavier around the holidays, which is saying something given all the bottles in that room. 
Throws himself into focusing on his work, however, which often gets on the nerves of his followers...But they expect it at this point.
On the other hand, he also seems to have a harder time keeping track of things, and grows frustrated with himself for it. He's too distracted.
Sole can help him deal with it by sneaking him out for a mission, something he initially considers a waste of resources but soon ends up fully throwing himself into and enjoying. He'll reluctantly admit that it was a good idea after the fact, but insist that it was a onetime thing. 
It isn't. It happens every year.
Best Gift: Completing your missions in a timely manner. Ad victoriam, or something.
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Chapter Reviews: February 19-23, 2019 + Thoughts on Nightbound and Wishful Thinking
High School Story: Class Act Chapter 2:
I've always suspected that Morgan will be a candidate in the school presidential elections, and I take it as a bad sign that she's running. I can never forget how cruel and unapologetic she was back in Book 2 of the first trilogy. Not to mention she nearly accepted Max and Kara's bribe in Book 3. Anyway, she better remain a lost cause, and the same goes for Lorenzo, who has no platform to speak of.
Once again, Skye shows valid concerns about the school presidential elections and the drama it will cause. I also admire Rory for seeing the elections as ultimately fun and games. Regarding Ajay, why does he have to see almost everything as serious business? He needs to be knocked some sense that his overcompetitiveness is alienating people.
It always warms my heart to see my old MC and Aiden together. And it's nice of them to lend their sled to new MC and Skye. Might pick the premium option to go sledding with Skye and visit the Silvas.
As to who I will support, I'll most likely support Rory. Her priority in encouraging the arts is much needed, especially with the heavy emphasis on sports at the expense of other activities. Not to mention that the twin's being too rash regarding her decision to run for president. I might support Myra, but time will tell if I will favor her.
The Heist: Monaco Chapter 12:
I think this Tristan Dumont fellow is shady, even after he conceded to the MC and Fabien. I mean, he has an illegal and dangerous race track that has seen many deaths. Not to mention that people play dirty all the time. I certainly do not enjoy seeing Gino again, especially since he played dirty as usual. Good thing I beat him in the race.
OH HAI Tillie! Nice to see you again! I might pick her over Fabien if I replay this series. I heard she's more interesting. I mean, I couldn't fully immerse myself in Fabien's backstory about him switching to street racing after losing to a street racer as a professional racer.
Okay, so the next chapter's title cracked me up and made me cringe at the same time. I have zero love for #LoveHacks, especially since the first book's completely aimless. The second book's a bit better, but the ending felt less satisfying than I thought because Martin and TJ's reactions at their defeat weren't shown. Bah! That aside, I look forward to know my hacker Anton better.
America's Most Eligible Chapter 6:
Holy cow! Slater is definitely a snake! Using Eden as a human shield and tripping Mackenzie over are some of the examples I've seen of his foul play. Fortunately, the popup I got said that I won fair and square. Well, my MC did, not Slater. I was just careful with the choices I picked. Nevertheless, I'm going to keep him at arm's length. He's definitely playing to win.
After seeing Slater cheating to win, I've come up with a new theory. What if he and Vince are the co-antagonists but with different agendas? After all, they're playing to win, but have different ways of interacting with the MC.
Seeing Ivy, Vince, Adam, and Mackenzie in the bottom four felt bittersweet. I like Mackenzie and am okay with Adam (partly because I roleplay my MC as gay and having a weakness for hot men). As for Ivy and Vince, I'd love to have them eliminated to save my skin and feel more secure. Now I just need to have Slater eliminated and focus on winning.
It's ridiculous that I have to spend diamonds to meet with Natalie despite her potential as the reason why Mackenzie's competing. I didn't pick the option to meet her because I'm saving my diamonds for now. I definitely will pick the option to meet her with Mackenzie.
A charity date at a high school prom sounds interesting, but please don't let my MC do anything dirty to Adam or Derek. High schoolers do not need to see that kind of stuff.
A Courtesan of Rome Chapter 16:
It's about time I get to kill Aquila. That scumbag finally got what he deserved when my MC intoxicated him, interrogated him, and finally killed him when he was begging for mercy. Pathetic of him. I still have to say that even though Caesar is the big bad of this series, Aquila is still the one executing his orders, and he likes feeling powerful.
Yay! Sabina's finally a free woman! I didn't pick the premium option to go to her house and trash Aquila's stuff, but the sight of her free from her abusive husband was just awesome to behold.
Victus fighting in that premium armor I bought when he was in Rome was awesome! I had him spare the gladiator because I envision him as compassionate if necessary.
Darn, the next chapter will involve Victus and Syphax fighting at the arena? What a nightmare! If there will be an option to determine who to live, I'd say Victus because I roleplay my MC as concerned with family. This is gonna be a dilemma.
Open Heart Chapters 1-2:
These are way better chapters than Ride or Die's first two. I enjoy how agonizing I felt when I struggled with the two patients. I was fully immersed at the tension, dynamics of the characters, and atmosphere.
Aurora already intrigues me with her anger at being compared to her aunt and desire to make a name for herself. Seeing her acting nice towards patients despite her aloof behavior proves that she's professional at her job. Reminds me of Anton Edison, but with a guarded personality. I'm curious to get to know her better and hopefully watch her slowly warming up to everyone else, but knowing this is an app where the writers have a tendency to lapse into thirst-fests for male love interests, chances that Aurora's story will progress at all will be slim. And in case anyone's wondering, Aurora doesn't qualify as a "mean girl" because she's already professional towards her patients and ultimately wants to prove her worth as her own individual, outside her aunt's shadow.
Ethan Ramsey's a tough boss, though his attitude comes across as too harsh at the same time. He could be weighed down by years of his job and wants newbie doctors to actually do their best, but that doesn't excuse his initial behavior. What irks me is that he's the cover LI, so I'll probably have to see him more than the other LIs, and there will be little to no progression with his character.
I like Jackie, Bryce, Sienna, and Elijah already. Jackie's tough on the MC but also has a soft side when it comes to her co-workers. In fact, she's tough at the right moments, and I respect that. Bryce is the big bundle of energy I sorely need after a stressful day at work. Sienna's perseverance at her job gives me optimism. Elijah's Harry Potter references are guaranteed to brighten my day.
So far, I'm moderately enjoying this, but time will tell if I'll like it or not. Here's hoping the writers keep up the good work.
Ride or Die Chapter 6:
I'm so helping MC's dad with his job, so that's why I circled the Verratti Motors manufacturing plant, in case the Mercy Park Crew or some other crew steals from it. However, I told Mona because she's my love interest, so she can stay. As for Colt, I didn't tell him. Oh, and I told Jason about the MPC heading to confront the Brotherhood. I like the idea of playing both the MPC and Brotherhood.
So the MC easily got her driver's license even though the instructor pointed out her many flaws when doing it? Ugh! A driver's test shouldn't be that easy, especially since you have to achieve a near-perfect score. I swear, this story is a blatant wish-fulfillment fantasy that defies common sense, but that's already obvious.
Logan and Colt arguing again. I swear, Pixelberry better give us players the option to set them up together, especially since I have no interest in pursuing either of them.
Surprisingly, this chapter sucks slightly less than the previous ones, mainly because I get to help the dad with his investigation and line of duty, and I don't feel forced to be with Logan. I even get to kiss Mona on the cheek.
The Elementalists Chapter 19:
It feels so satisfying to see my MC receiving various honors from Professors Kontos and Englund, and Dean Swan. Not to mention that I get praised by Atlas. Nice.
I'm so happy for Aster when she finally gets accepted to Penderghast. I hope this means I'll see more of her because she rarely shows up throughout Book 1 despite the lore she mentions behind paywalls. Seriously, there's a lot of potential she and the things she has said can bring to the story. Pixelberry better not waste their resources on Book 2.
Honestly, the new villain looks ridiculous. His weirdly colored suit, equally weird top hat, and evil-looking mustache make him look so over the top that I can't take him seriously, even when he was killing the poor hiker with a tornado. He looks like Discount Dorian Pavus, but with horrible fashion taste.
Anyway, I think The Elementalists is enjoyable at first, with its worldbuilding early on and the clues I receive. Pity it degenerated into a Beckett thirst-fest since Chapter 9. I mean, he's okay as a character, and I'm fine with pursuing him with my MC, but he has too many premium scenes that make no sense or even move the plot and his character forward. It's like Pixelberry has wasted their limited time and resources on certain love interests they think the silent majority loves that they squeeze other love interests and the story out in order to make way for their cash cows. At least the few moments I get to learn about the setting and other characters are worthwhile.
What do I want from the next book? I want to see the interactions between the different races, and Aster's enrollment into Penderghast is a good start. I hope to see more races, however, and the dynamics between them. Like, what are their histories, priorities, and approaches to the world around them and how they affect the way they see the world and other races? I also wonder how this new villain will factor into this engrossing setting. He could be someone who tricks one race into turning against the others.
Thoughts on Wishful Thinking and Nightbound:
I'm kind of wary that Nightbound will only let us play as a female MC. Bloodbound lets us play as a female only because Pixelberry was saving funds for other books, and it's possible Pixelberry will do the same thing to Nightbound, being a spinoff of Bloodbound. It could be good, but the possible lack of gender options will be a wasted opportunity.
As for Wishful Thinking, I honestly have no opinion on it so far. I think it has a higher chance of providing gender options, but it doesn't guarantee that the story will be good. So far, I'm not super excited, considering the declining quality of most of the stories as of late.
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