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my-emotional-self · 7 years

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Let Me Protect You Chapter 28/?

Pairings: Chris Evans x OFC Emilia

Word Count: 1,726

Warnings: Swearing, minor angst, fluff

Rating: PG-13

Summary: After Emilia’s fiancé cheats on her, she moves to California to live with her brother Eric, who just so happens to be good friends with Chris Evans. Follow Emilia and her roller coaster life through heartbreak, love, and emotional trauma. Will Emilia choose to let Chris into her heart, or will she remain broken and alone forever?

You awoke the next morning with a startle; voices carrying themselves upstairs to your wake. Your mind was hazy from just being woken up and as you started to come to, you realized you were in Chris’ bedroom at his mother’s house. Your brows wrinkled in confusion as you swore you fell asleep on the couch; but you didn’t pay too much mind to it as this would not have been the first time Chris carried you to bed. A yawn escaped your mouth as you stretched across the bed, feeling your muscles being pulled while you tried to wake. Your phone chimed and as you grabbed it, you saw it wasn’t the morning, but almost afternoon. “Shit” you muttered to yourself as you realized how late you slept.

Opening your phone you saw it was a text from your brother.

Eric: Check this out Em

It was a link that he sent you so you curiously opened it up and your jaw dropped at what you saw.

Chris Evans Seen With Mystery Woman Strolling Around Boston Yesterday Afternoon

Is Chris Evans dating again after his last failed attempt? Our sources may think so! Chris Evans was spotted strolling around Boston all afternoon with a mystery woman. They were walking hand-in-hand and he even stole sweet kisses from her. It seems as if Chris is at home visiting family for the Holidays and he brought along a new lady friend. Does this mean Captain America himself is finally ready to settle down? Did he finally find a woman to make an honest man of himself? Take a look at the pictures and find out for yourself.

You couldn’t believe what you saw. There were dozens of pictures of you and Chris together from yesterday’s touristy activities. Looking closely at the pictures, you couldn’t really see much of yourself as you had on a baseball hat, sunglasses, and a scarf. You weren’t really all that mad about it because you knew it would happen eventually. You knew that being out in public with Chris was bound to get some photographs in the entertainment news media. Chris was an actor, it happened. What you were worried about was his fans though. He had die-hard fans and you didn’t want them to tear you apart once they found out who you were. Maybe they would be happy that you were just a normal person and not a celebrity. Maybe his fans would be happy because they could relate to that.

You decided to text Eric back and see what he thought in all this.

Emilia: What do you think I should do? Do you think Chris knows about this?

Eric: There isn’t really a whole lot you can do Em. You can tell Chris if you want but I’m sure he knows already. Are you ready to be in the public eye as his girlfriend?

Emilia: I mean I guess. I knew this would happen sooner or later. It’s just sooner than I thought. I know people can be vicious in the media and I hope I can just ignore it

Eric: You have me and Chris to help you through it. Don’t worry too much Em. You just enjoy Christmas ok? I love you

Emilia: thanks Eric. I love you too.

You got dressed in a pair of black leggings and a long maroon sweater that went all the way down to your knees before brushing your hair and teeth. From the sounds of it, everyone was already up and gathered in the kitchen as you made your way downstairs, their laughter filling the house.

“Good morning sleeping beauty” Chris greeted you with a gentle kiss to your lips as you sat on a stool next to him. “Mornin” you mumbled out still a bit sleepy. “What’s on the agenda for today?” you asked through a stifled yawn. Lisa gave you a warm smile as she looked between you and Chris. She was so happy that her son finally found “one of the good ones” she called it. She knew you two were destined to be together; she could tell from the way you looked at one another and your body language.

“Well my dear, its cookie baking day!” Lisa said with excitement as the kids hooted and hollered in joy.

You turned to Chris with such a colossal grin; he in turn gave you the exact grin. He knew how much you loved to bake. Even though in the past you would use baking as a distraction instead of more harmful ways, but you still loved to bake nonetheless. “Eeeeeee!!! I’m so excited!” you said wiggling around in your chair and clapping your hands together while Lisa laughed at your gesture.

Turning back to face Chris, you saw his grin start to fade and a slight sadness in his eyes. You hated seeing him like this. He should never be sad; he was too good to be any kinds of sad. It pained you to see him this way. You leaned into him and whispered “is everything alright?” He raised his eyes to look into your, his once wide grin now replaced with a weak smile. “We’ll be right back Ma” he stated before taking your hand in his and guiding you up from the stool. You followed him up the stairs and into his bedroom, confusion on your face not knowing what was going on.

He shut the door and steered you to the bed, motioning for you to sit. You did so as he crouched down in front of you, taking both your hands in his. Your heart started racing as your eyes darted back and forth between his. You didn’t know what was going on and it made you nervous. Emotions started to flood you as you thought the worst. Your chin started to tremble as his eyes lowered to the floor. “Yo-you’re breaking u-up with me are-aren’t you” you quietly sobbed out. Chris’ head snapped back up to yours in an instant as he let go of your hands to cup your quivering cheeks. “God baby no!! Why would you-“ he cut himself short when he noticed your tears. “Fuck sweetheart I’m sorry” he apologized while wrapping you into his arms. Your face buried into his chest as your sobs quickly quieted down. “Don’t sca-scare me like that” you hiccupped out as he pulled away from you. He gave you another weak smile before connecting your lips; your face still wet with the lingering tears that fell. “I didn’t mean to Ems. I’m so sorry. I would never hurt you like that. I promise. I wanted to talk to you about an article I saw that my publicist sent me” he said with remorse. You nodded your head at him “Eric sent me the link. I saw it” you replied. “And are you okay?” he asked. You observed his face at his question. The wrinkles on his forehead evident as his eyes were raised. His eyes were a mixture of worry and comfort. “Chris I knew this was going to happen at some point…there was no stopping it. I will be fine. I knew the consequences of getting into a relationship with you and I wanted to take my chances. That’s how important you are to me” you told him lovingly. It felt like his gaze bore into your soul, deep down into your core. You loved this man and you would do anything for him. Even if meant being in the public eye and getting backlash from fans or other celebrities. With that, he gave you a passionate kiss that made you feel he felt the same.

After your loving embrace the two of you joined the rest of his family in the kitchen again. Lisa and his sisters started gathering everything that was needed for the Christmas cookies you were about to make. Thank goodness she had a massive kitchen and lots of counter space to hold everything. She even had a double oven so that would make things that much easier for today.

You rolled up your sleeves and got to work with the girls while Chris and Scott kept the children entertained for the time being. They would help with the decorating when the cookies were ready.

You laughed and joked with his mom and sisters for hours that day. The conversation was much like with you and Chris; it flowed freely and there was never and awkward silence. They embraced you with open arms and you felt right at home here. Your heart expanded even more if at all possible at the love they showed you.

As the first batch of cookies were ready, Chris, Scott and the kids came barreling into the kitchen with eager hands ready to decorate. You loved seeing Chris around his family. It made him relax and less tense as if he had no worries in the world; it was the way you loved to see him. He was such a great uncle too and would be a great dad one day.

It was well after dark by the time the cookies were finally finished. You looked around the kitchen and admired all the work you guys put in. Dozens upon dozens of all kinds of Christmas cookies littered the countertop and you were in heaven; baking all day putting you at ease.

You helped clean up the kitchen of the mess that was made throughout the day. You knew you had to make a quick run to the store to get one last thing for Chris’ gift. After the kitchen was cleaned you went to find Chris. He was in the basement with Scott watching a football game and drinking some beer. “Hey babe, can I borrow the car keys? I have to make a quick run to the store” you asked of him. “I can come with if you want?” You shook your head at him “No I’ll be quick. You stay and watch the game with Scott.” He got up to give you a kiss as his hands dug into his pockets to fetch the keys. “Do you know your way there?” he questioned. “I can manage” you replied playfully. He let out a small laugh as he gave you another quick kiss before you headed off to the store.

Tag List: @evansfanficweekly @iamwarrenspeace @ssweet-empowerment @always-an-evans-addict @patzammit @tacohead13 @valentinesbird @littlemissacorn @white-chocolate-mocha-fan @potterhead1265

#Chris Evans x Reader #Chris Evans x OFC #Chris Evans Fanfiction #Chris Evans Fanfic #Chris Evans #Chris Evans Imagine #Marvel #Avengers #Steve Rogers Fanfiction #Captain America Fanfiction

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marketingadvisorvietnam · 6 years

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LGBT parents enfold community in a healing embrace

Marketing Advisor đã viết bài trên http://www.ticvietnam.vn/lgbt-parents-enfold-community-in-a-healing-embrace/

LGBT parents enfold community in a healing embrace

Over the last few decades, numerous platforms have been established for LGBTQI+ (lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, queer or questioning, and intersex) members to voice their concerns and pains, and tell their stories to a sympathetic audience.

In many of these stories, a common thread is the blame and ostracism LGBTQI people suffer at society’s hands, often beginning with their parents and other relatives.

But this is not true of many parents, who share the same feelings of fear and anxiety when confronted with the truth of their children’s different sexual orientations.

The story of these parents are almost never told or heard.

A public talk show last month tried to change this. It gave the opportunity for real life stories of Vietnamese parents who have LGBTQI+ children as well as those who are LGBTQI+ themselves.

It was not a crowded gathering, but the stories it elicited were overwhelmingly touching.

One of the main organizers was PFLAG, the first community of its kind in Vietnam. PFLAG stands for “Parents, Families, and Friends of Lesbians and Gays”. These parents have not only embraced their own children, but are also reaching out to LGBT strangers and unknown moms and dads.

“Can we have the permission of the participating parents for us to call you Mother and Father today?” asked the event’s host, setting the stage for a very close bonding.

The parents responded by referring to all young people present as “child.”

Mother Chau, a prominent figure in PFLAG community was the first to share her story, though the MC had to feed the audience a synopsis first. Telling it all on her own would have been emotionally overwhelming for her.

PFLAG member Chau shares an LGBT case she helped with. Sititng next to her is another PFLAG member, Thang (left). Thang and Chau are both familiar parent faces in the LGBT community. Photo by Sen

Family honor and marriages of convenience

Chau got to know a lesbian at a restaurant where she used to work. Because of her sexual orientation, she no longer lived with her family. The problem wasn’t her parents – it was her grandmother who would reprimand her harshly. The grandmother’s last words, just before she died, set the tone for the rest of this woman’s life: “She has to get a husband.”

To appease her relatives and maintain her “family honor,” the young woman returned home for a wedding with a paid groom, who was told of the situation. He was fully compensated for his participation in the face-saving marriage, but it did not stop him from getting drunk and raping his lesbian wife one day.

The rape not only traumatized the woman mentally to the extent of requiring prolonged medication, it also made her pregnant. She give birth to a “slow child” as a result of all the medicines she’d taken to deal with her mental trauma.

Chau was almost in tears as she narrated the story.

“This is a wake-up call for parents out there,” she said. A healthy woman gave up her way of life and true self to fulfill a death wish, with tragic results.

“Is this the price one must pay for family honor?” Chau asked all listeners.

“Because the pregnancy was helping the woman recover her mental health, abortion was not recommended. Now she is doing much better and is no longer heavily dependent on medication. Her child now goes to school,” Chau added.

The accidental father claimed that the contractual nature of their “marriage” meant he had no responsibility towards his victim and child. The family did not press charges.

It might have been love that motivated the family to coerce the woman into the accepted mold of gender norms, but that love was a recipe for disaster, Chau said.

“Now we see love resurrected with healing power in this story, as the rape victim and her child are now living in the caring, affectionate arms of a woman.”

No sex life

As a member of PFLAG, Chau, who has a gay son, always keeps her eyes and ears wide open to spot LGBT in the vicinity who might need help. Mother Yen Ly, president of PFLAG Vietnam, does the same.

Ly shared the story of a man in his late 30s, a resident of the central Thanh Hoa Province, where traditional prejudices against gay people still hold strong. He and his wife have a teenage daughter, though there is no sex life.

“Every night I would try to find work somewhere to do and only come back home when my wife is asleep. It was a glimpse of hell every time I crossed our bed,” he told Ly.

He finally decided to put everything on the table, literally, with a letter of confession to his wife. This is not something any heterosexual married woman expects to experience. She was heartbroken, and his parents were furious. Coming out of the closet created an immense distance between him and his family.

Following Ly’s advice, the man invited his parents to different workshops organized by PFLAG for parents of LGBT children. Gradually they came out of their hate and prejudice to welcome their son for who he was.

The man is now happily divorced and his daughter visits him frequently.

Unheard of

Huynh Minh Thao, aka Sas Ri, director of communications and services of ICS – the first LGBT rights organization in Vietnam, said “loveless marriages benefit neither our society nor the relationship.”

He reckoned that the root cause for this happening was Vietnamese parents’ fear that their LGBT children were destined to live a tough life without a life partner that could bear them children.

“Getting married, bearing offspring and being taken care of by them is the most favored normal way of living. The idea of LGBT individuals having a healthy, happy life outside of this model is unheard of, for a lot of parents,” Thao said.

Still a man’s world

A panel guest – a media expert who requested anonymity, said gender disparity was another problem that rears its ugly head in LGBT issues, and that the victim was not always the person with a different sexual orientation.

He shared the story of a highly respected teacher in a small city, who is also a government official in the local educational department.

Everything about his life goes according to the book. A Vietnamese middle-aged man, secure career, dedicated wife and kids.

There was just one caveat: he likes men.

Unlike the previous story, this man has not bothered to keep it a secret from his immediate family. He has built a private room in his house where only he and his lovers are allowed. “The room is fully equipped and super romantic,” said the expert.

However, this does not mean his wife and children are free from living a lie because they cannot utter a word to anyone because of his exalted position in his field. For the same reason, divorce is out of the question.

The wife, therefore, is set for the life of any traditional Vietnamese woman – devoted to their husband, whose happiness comes before theirs.

In this case, it was the straight spouse, the wife and a mother, who has been victimized and needed help, the guest noted.

Those who were at the event agreed that more time and effort was needed to raise understanding and empathy so that the sad stories narrated would, in the future, become an anomaly in the country.

That is the mission that ICS and PFLAG Vietnam have set for themselves. While ICS works towards LGBTI+ community empowerment, social change, and law advocacy, as well as providing consultation and legal aid, PFLAG devotes its resources to similar initiatives and organizes safe platforms for LGBT discussions.

‘Help your parents’

One of the most asked questions in the LGBT community is: “how do I come out safely?”

And it was raised again at the event.

Chau said that it was difficult for parents to keep up with their children, who shift from one milestone of growth to another.

“You should help your parents confront the naysayers and enrich their LGBT knowledge, instead of their trying to protect family honor for the sake of outsiders while attacking their own children,” Chau told a teenager.

The event’s host said he felt parents of LGBTQI+ chide their children not because they do not love them, but because they are deeply offended by outsiders’ mocking of their loved ones for their unorthodox sexual orientations. They want to change that, “but sometimes they direct their anger at the wrong person – their own children.

“Even you need time to accept and welcome yourself, how can parents instantly accept you?” an event organizer asked.

“When you are becoming more cognizant of the fact that you are different, think about your parents. Have you ever considered your parents’ perspective? That they are scared too because they are different for having a gay child?”

Teddy, a guest advises others on coming out successfully. Sitting next to him is his mother, Dinh Thi Yen Ly, president of PFLAG. It took Ly five years to accept her son’s sexual identity and mend their relationship. Sitting across them are another mother-LGBT son pair who’ve also been through their own journey towards understanding one another. Photo by Sen

Teddy, a university lecturer at the Ho Chi Minh University of Technology recommended that everyone comes out “strategically.”

He said: “You need to calculate all the risks. If you want your parents to understand you, make sure you are also willing to understand them.

Huynh Minh Thao felt that there was no blanket solution that fits every family, but the following steps might benefit some.

“First of all, know thyself. LGBT need to know who they are, what they need, and essentially equip themselves with relevant LGBT knowledge. The second step involves finding an ally in the family, who has an open and receptive mind. Last but not least, team up with that person to find other family members who can sympathize with your situation,” the ICS director said.

Thao advised: “Every family is different, but having an ally means you will be protected to an extent, especially when that person has a big influence in the family.”

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topsolarpanels · 7 years

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My beef over Hillary Clinton’s loss is with liberal feminists, young and old

One picture, taken in the New York woods, restored presidential candidates to ordinary life. If Democrat had listened to ordinary Americans, she might have been president

The black mood of women feeling battered and bereft after Hillary Clintons loss was abruptly penetrated on Thursday by an image that brought the tears all over again.

It was a snap on Facebook taken on the hiking trails surrounding Chappaqua by Margot Gerster, a grieve Hillary supporter who was out strolling with her “girls “. Suddenly, she wrote, there was the audio of rustling. Then, seeming like a mirage in the clearing, was Hillary herself with Bill and their puppies, doing exactly the same thing as Gerster. The former president obliged Gerster by taking the photograph after she and Hillary had exchanged a few sweet pleasantries and hugged.

Nothing I have seen in the last 15 months of the campaign has resonated with me as much as the image that Gerster posted. It depicts Hillary wearing what looks like no make-up, her hair uncoiffed, garmented in a baggy black parka, brown leggings and boots, and holding the dog leash twisted in her hand as her poodle mixture snuffles among the carpet of foliages at her feet.

Only 24 hours after delivering the poised, dignified concession speech that masked her own sorrow and tried to mend ours, its as if she had finally been returned to the world as she really is: an approachable female in late middle age, hiking the roads with her dogs and her husband in the solitude of a beautiful fall morning, trying to cope with her ache. The sight of it, so comforting in the warmth of its ordinariness, was a visual rebuke to the aberration and the cruelty of the two attacks she has suffered.

She was my champion. I miss her, my 26 -year-old daughter grieved last night. Every disappointed Democratic supporter has her own target for anger, it seems. My daughters is her fellow millennials, who didnt come out in enough numbers to take Clinton to the White House. Clinton won this group by 54%, six points down from Obama in 2012. Always in a storm of umbrage about micro-aggressions, those crucial solipsistic stay-at-home millennials wound up enabling the macro-aggression of Donald Trump.

By contrast, Hillary has been the living personification of resistance to a torrent of intimidation that was not a construct, but horribly real. She faced an alt-right and Fox News smear campaign, followed by the coup de grace from the self-righteous FBI director who hasnt yet had the modesty to resign. She was called a robber, a offender, a liar who was too old, too past it , not cool enough , not authentic enough , not not not.

But there are iconic images of her heroism we should never forget: her cool accuracy through 11 hours of congressional assault in the Benghazi hearings, her victory in each presidential debate with crackling, well-prepared debates, even though in one she was watched by a peanut gallery of her husbands accusers disgracefully assembled by Trump to set her off her stride. The intent was to portray her as Bills enabler, which is the cruelest slander of all.

Hillary Clintons concession speech in full

Heres my own beef. Liberal feminists, young and old, need to question the role they played in Hillarys demise. The two weeks of media hyperventilation over grab-her-by-the-pussygate, when the airwaves were saturated with aghast liberal women equating Trumps gross remarks with sexual assault, had the opposite impact on multiple girls voters in the Heartland.

These are resilient girls, often working two or three chores, for whom boorish humen are an occasional occupational hazard , not an existential menace. They rolled their eyes over Trumps unmitigated coarseness, but still bought into his patter that hed be the greatest undertaking producer who ever lived. Oh, and they wondered why his behaviour was any worse than Bills.

Missing this pragmatic answer by so many females was another mistake of Robbie Mooks campaign data nerds. They calculated that Americas women would all be as outraged as the ones they came home to at night. But pink slip have reached entire neighborhoods, and townships. The angry white working class men who voted in such strength for Trump do not live in an emotional vacuum. They are loved by white working class girls their wives, daughters, sisters and moms, who participate in their remaindered pain. It is everywhere in the interviews. My papa lost his business, My husband hasnt been the same since his undertaking at the factory went away.

Even though, in the digital age, there was no bigger Trump lie than feigning fabricating jobs will ever return, rust belt women and plenty of others find him as the rough, tough boss who would bring the business back, and with it the manhood of the sad guy they love.

Trumps reality show crassness was another blind spot with upper-class liberals encompassing the election and operating Hillarys campaign. At every moment when the Trump tribe streamed behind him on to the convention stage or the tarmac, America saw images of a Kardashian Camelot: a phalanx of GQ men and leggy, gorgeous girls following the heavyset guy who had a private 757 airplane and a gold tower with his name on it.

While commentators sniggered, millions ensure the all-American success they dreamed of. They rooted for the guy who had it but was hated by the elites for having it. There are more tired spouses who want to be Melania sitting by the pool in designer sunglasses than there are women who want to pursue a PhD in earnest self-improvement. And there are more young women who find the smartness and modernity of Ivanka as the ultimate polished specimen of blonde branded content they want to buy.

In the entertainment era, even political candidates must be able to entertain. Which show would you rather watch? The Clintons round a table debating the right approach to solar energy, or the show about the rivalries between the Trump women who vie for “members attention” of a capricious patriarch? Four years is a long time.

Even though she won the popular vote by exactly what he expected to be more than two million ballots, Hillary was not destined to shatter what she has called, with agonizing ruefulness, that highest and hardest glass ceiling. So what do we want, and what do we expect from a woman leader who can win?

The killer rap on Hillary was that she was never authentic. I would argue that, born into a generation that had to break down so many culture walls, and wounded by a wedding that always involved her to cover up pain, she had PTSD on behalf of us all by the time she operated for chairwoman. Yes, even the complacent young person, who believed until now that they were living in a post-gender world.

If you want to see authentic girls leaders who can really entertain, you have to go now to the generation in their 40 s who do not have the combat scars of the women who were firsts. Its no good bringing up Angela Merkel. Germany is not the US. After the trauma of Hitler, theirs is an anti-charisma culture that actively distrusts pizzazz.

Why America elected Trump

Some fabulous women won senatorial elections. They are the post-Hillary icons. Kamala Harris in California is a political knockout, as is Tammy Duckworth of Illinois, who defeated an incumbent Republican senator. Shes a war veteran who lost both legs in Iraq. Watch for the rise of Ilhan Omar, the vibrant 34 -year-old former refugee and practising Muslim who became Americas first Somali-American female lawmaker. She beat out her Republican opponent to gain a seat in Minnesotas House of Representatives.

If you want to go global, cross the channel and look at the two wildly popular women at the top of politics in Scotland: Nicola Sturgeon, first minister of the Scottish National Party, is as direct as she is fearless. After the US election result, she doubled down on her distaste for Trump and condemned diplomatic stillnes in the face of attitudes of racism, sexism misogyny or fanaticism of any kind.

In opposition to her is another winner: Ruth Davidson, the kickboxing, working-class former territorial army member and open lesbian who, with her salty humour and irreverent debate style, has single-handedly made the once irrelevant Scottish Tory party a rising force. Maybe being around men in the army made her impervious to misogynist trolls. Nice. Classy. Do you kiss your mother with that mouth? Bet shes really proud of you, she tweeted to one who told her that what she needed was a good fuck.

The new media narrative is that the Clinton era is now over and done. But perhaps this last chapter of Hillarys life can be the most rewarding. On the job, she was always the first up and the last to go to bed. Heaven for her is poring over a briefing volume with her hair tied back in a scrunchy, cracking down on the run. Imagine the agony she must have endured while being deprived of the thing she loves doing most for 15 long months. Instead, she was forced to take over the grandstanding and gladhanding that shes never been good at.

She still has an important role to play, and she began it in her concession speech by telling the young girls who, like my daughter, adore her, never to give up.

Hillary , now you can be the woman you really are, the woman in the timbers. More important to the rest of us, you can be the Queen Maker. A friend told me how, very late on election night, she snuck into her 10 -year-old daughters room as she always does, to tuck her in and remove her open laptop from the bed. She saw on the screen that her daughter had been in the middle of writing a letter before she fell asleep.

Dear Madame President, it began, I want to tell you the things that are important to daughters like me

The letter was unfinished.

Read more: www.theguardian.com

The post My beef over Hillary Clinton’s loss is with liberal feminists, young and old appeared first on Top Rated Solar Panels.

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marketingadvisorvietnam · 6 years

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LGBT parents enfold community in a healing embrace

Marketing Advisor đã viết bài trên http://www.ticvietnam.vn/lgbt-parents-enfold-community-in-a-healing-embrace/

LGBT parents enfold community in a healing embrace

In many of these stories, a common thread is the blame and ostracism LGBTQI people suffer at society’s hands, often beginning with their parents and other relatives.

But this is not true of many parents, who share the same feelings of fear and anxiety when confronted with the truth of their children’s different sexual orientations.

The story of these parents are almost never told or heard.

A public talk show last month tried to change this. It gave the opportunity for real life stories of Vietnamese parents who have LGBTQI+ children as well as those who are LGBTQI+ themselves.

It was not a crowded gathering, but the stories it elicited were overwhelmingly touching.

“Can we have the permission of the participating parents for us to call you Mother and Father today?” asked the event’s host, setting the stage for a very close bonding.

The parents responded by referring to all young people present as “child.”

PFLAG member Chau shares an LGBT case she helped with. Sititng next to her is another PFLAG member, Thang (left). Thang and Chau are both familiar parent faces in the LGBT community. Photo by Sen

Family honor and marriages of convenience

Chau was almost in tears as she narrated the story.

“This is a wake-up call for parents out there,” she said. A healthy woman gave up her way of life and true self to fulfill a death wish, with tragic results.

“Is this the price one must pay for family honor?” Chau asked all listeners.

The accidental father claimed that the contractual nature of their “marriage” meant he had no responsibility towards his victim and child. The family did not press charges.

It might have been love that motivated the family to coerce the woman into the accepted mold of gender norms, but that love was a recipe for disaster, Chau said.

“Now we see love resurrected with healing power in this story, as the rape victim and her child are now living in the caring, affectionate arms of a woman.”

No sex life

As a member of PFLAG, Chau, who has a gay son, always keeps her eyes and ears wide open to spot LGBT in the vicinity who might need help. Mother Yen Ly, president of PFLAG Vietnam, does the same.

“Every night I would try to find work somewhere to do and only come back home when my wife is asleep. It was a glimpse of hell every time I crossed our bed,” he told Ly.

The man is now happily divorced and his daughter visits him frequently.

Unheard of

He reckoned that the root cause for this happening was Vietnamese parents’ fear that their LGBT children were destined to live a tough life without a life partner that could bear them children.

Still a man’s world

He shared the story of a highly respected teacher in a small city, who is also a government official in the local educational department.

Everything about his life goes according to the book. A Vietnamese middle-aged man, secure career, dedicated wife and kids.

There was just one caveat: he likes men.

The wife, therefore, is set for the life of any traditional Vietnamese woman – devoted to their husband, whose happiness comes before theirs.

In this case, it was the straight spouse, the wife and a mother, who has been victimized and needed help, the guest noted.

Those who were at the event agreed that more time and effort was needed to raise understanding and empathy so that the sad stories narrated would, in the future, become an anomaly in the country.

‘Help your parents’

One of the most asked questions in the LGBT community is: “how do I come out safely?”

And it was raised again at the event.

Chau said that it was difficult for parents to keep up with their children, who shift from one milestone of growth to another.

“Even you need time to accept and welcome yourself, how can parents instantly accept you?” an event organizer asked.

Teddy, a university lecturer at the Ho Chi Minh University of Technology recommended that everyone comes out “strategically.”

He said: “You need to calculate all the risks. If you want your parents to understand you, make sure you are also willing to understand them.

Huynh Minh Thao felt that there was no blanket solution that fits every family, but the following steps might benefit some.

Thao advised: “Every family is different, but having an ally means you will be protected to an extent, especially when that person has a big influence in the family.”

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marketingadvisorvietnam · 6 years

Text

LGBT parents enfold community in a healing embrace

Marketing Advisor đã viết bài trên https://www.ticvietnam.vn/lgbt-parents-enfold-community-in-a-healing-embrace/

LGBT parents enfold community in a healing embrace

In many of these stories, a common thread is the blame and ostracism LGBTQI people suffer at society’s hands, often beginning with their parents and other relatives.

But this is not true of many parents, who share the same feelings of fear and anxiety when confronted with the truth of their children’s different sexual orientations.

The story of these parents are almost never told or heard.

A public talk show last month tried to change this. It gave the opportunity for real life stories of Vietnamese parents who have LGBTQI+ children as well as those who are LGBTQI+ themselves.

It was not a crowded gathering, but the stories it elicited were overwhelmingly touching.

“Can we have the permission of the participating parents for us to call you Mother and Father today?” asked the event’s host, setting the stage for a very close bonding.

The parents responded by referring to all young people present as “child.”

PFLAG member Chau shares an LGBT case she helped with. Sititng next to her is another PFLAG member, Thang (left). Thang and Chau are both familiar parent faces in the LGBT community. Photo by Sen

Family honor and marriages of convenience

Chau was almost in tears as she narrated the story.

“This is a wake-up call for parents out there,” she said. A healthy woman gave up her way of life and true self to fulfill a death wish, with tragic results.

“Is this the price one must pay for family honor?” Chau asked all listeners.

The accidental father claimed that the contractual nature of their “marriage” meant he had no responsibility towards his victim and child. The family did not press charges.

It might have been love that motivated the family to coerce the woman into the accepted mold of gender norms, but that love was a recipe for disaster, Chau said.

“Now we see love resurrected with healing power in this story, as the rape victim and her child are now living in the caring, affectionate arms of a woman.”

No sex life

As a member of PFLAG, Chau, who has a gay son, always keeps her eyes and ears wide open to spot LGBT in the vicinity who might need help. Mother Yen Ly, president of PFLAG Vietnam, does the same.

“Every night I would try to find work somewhere to do and only come back home when my wife is asleep. It was a glimpse of hell every time I crossed our bed,” he told Ly.

The man is now happily divorced and his daughter visits him frequently.

Unheard of

He reckoned that the root cause for this happening was Vietnamese parents’ fear that their LGBT children were destined to live a tough life without a life partner that could bear them children.

Still a man’s world

He shared the story of a highly respected teacher in a small city, who is also a government official in the local educational department.

Everything about his life goes according to the book. A Vietnamese middle-aged man, secure career, dedicated wife and kids.

There was just one caveat: he likes men.

The wife, therefore, is set for the life of any traditional Vietnamese woman – devoted to their husband, whose happiness comes before theirs.

In this case, it was the straight spouse, the wife and a mother, who has been victimized and needed help, the guest noted.

Those who were at the event agreed that more time and effort was needed to raise understanding and empathy so that the sad stories narrated would, in the future, become an anomaly in the country.

‘Help your parents’

One of the most asked questions in the LGBT community is: “how do I come out safely?”

And it was raised again at the event.

Chau said that it was difficult for parents to keep up with their children, who shift from one milestone of growth to another.

“Even you need time to accept and welcome yourself, how can parents instantly accept you?” an event organizer asked.

Teddy, a university lecturer at the Ho Chi Minh University of Technology recommended that everyone comes out “strategically.”

He said: “You need to calculate all the risks. If you want your parents to understand you, make sure you are also willing to understand them.

Huynh Minh Thao felt that there was no blanket solution that fits every family, but the following steps might benefit some.

Thao advised: “Every family is different, but having an ally means you will be protected to an extent, especially when that person has a big influence in the family.”

0 notes