#arghhh im just in a funk

[basic-enemy]

wish that i could get anything off the ground wrt to my writing. like I know im not fucking Le Guin or Butler im not writing genre-changing shit but it's so exhausting putting heart and soul into my stories and getting rejection after rejection after rejection. and for stupid fucking reasons half the time, when they even bother to tell me the reasons. makes it hard to be creative. and like, fuck, im a happy person, i like where im at, i love the people ive surrounded myself with, i just wish it wasnt so soul crushing writing stories no one will ever read when i so desperately want people to read them. im not of a mind that i can brand myself online, i dont know how to cache all my work in a big database. i dont have the werewithal or business acumen to organize and manage a kofi or patreon and write stories on commission, even though i have the goddamn talent and expertise to do the actual art. i just. ARGHHH i fucking hate it here. anyways. back to the documence. im gonna keep writing cause i love it. but FUCk do i slow down my output when i get in a funk and a rut like this

#venting #ignore me #i need to get back on my meds #and maybe start submitting stories again