#anyway yeah I'm a grinch or whatefver the fuck

[nozoroomie]

I'm exhausted. Everyone here is exhausted. I always hated the holiday season for personal reasons but I can't believe I hate it even more now. The Christmas music everywhere is just gunna be this painful reminder for me that my girlfriend died right smack at the beginning of the holiday season for the next I don't know how many years.

nothing is comforting. I try to do things out of normalcy, but I don't want to do anything. I force myself to fucking eat cause food doesn't taste good anymore and -shocker- I have no appetite.

My top surgery had to be postponed to who knows when, I spent half of November sick with the flu first and then shortly after covid, my girlfriend fucking DIED and my sisters keep asking me what I fucking want for fucking CHRISTMAS when all I can think about is how I;m gunna get through the next fucking day.

I want my tits gone and my girlfriend to be alive and to never celebrate this god forsaken capitalistic hell holiday for the rest of my fucking life. FUCK CHRISTMAS. Get that Holiday spirit shit out of my face. Like oh!! be kind to people this time of year and show your compassion and love to one another!

MAYBE DO THAT ALL YEAR FFS.

Yes, it's likely I'm speaking out of grief and YES I'm aware my opinions can change with time and healing and blah blah fucking blah but I'm so god damn tired of being so fucking tired and depressed and this world is hell and everything fucking sucks.

Thanks for reading if you did, sorry if it upsets you or not. idk. Idek why im apologizing for having an opinion but whatever. felt like I had to since it feels like a fucking crime to hate christmas or something.

#roomie speaks #grief tw #grief posting #the anger stage is clearly starting here #also sorta like shitting on christmas so if christmas is ur favourite thing ever like it is for half the people in my life please don't rea #*dont read #fucking tags cutting off my sentence #anyway yeah I'm a grinch or whatefver the fuck #bah humbug and shit