#anyway this has been “things about mlc that make me want to tear my hair out at 3AM”

[qpjianghu]

(...but what if I was?)

Li Lianhua / Li Xiangyi | Mysterious Lotus Casebook (2023)

#mysterious lotus casebook #li lianhua #li xiangyi #lhl #my mlc gifs #thanks to the folks who helped weigh in on that last gif! #specifically thank you to: #the-surreptitious-albatross #lianxiaojie #and an apology... #to our dear a-fei #for including him in this gifset #I still believe that the feihua relationship is one of the most devastating tragedies of this show #because of the way that di feisheng grows subtly but significantly over the course of the show #and he comes SO CLOSE to loving and accepting llh/lxy for who he is and who he always was #and maybe he in fact DOES get to this point internally #but his last words to llh are inviting him to fight him like times of old #showing (in llh's eyes at least) a regression to their previous selves #a “self” that maybe llh feels he never actually was #which is why I specifically wanted a feihua scene in that last gif to juxtapose with the more obvious shan gudao scene #the subtext of that feihua scene is very sexy of them (I am looking disrespectfully) #but the text of the scene is brutal and tragic: #as di feisheng violently lashes out at li lianua for his perceived weaknesses #and while llh's initial reaction was at most faintly irritated up until that point #you can see that spark of genuine hurt and sadness in his gaze as dfs holds him at arms length #anyway this has been “things about mlc that make me want to tear my hair out at 3AM” #thank you for coming to my ted talk