#anyway for those of you who have played portal (first or second game. doesn't matter)

[glimmeringtwilight]

Hi there, I hope you're doing well 😭 ❤️

I don't mean to bother you with this so please ignore if it makes you uncomfortable, but I was wondering if there's any Dottore piece in the works or if you're planning any in the future or something (any crumb will do KSNDJDBEHSJ) I love your writing and have been reading your fanfics a few times aha :"D

Have a good day, and I hope this doesn't come off rude! p(^-^)q much love!

In the works I have the Dottore halloween fic (one of the drafts I'm eyeing rn) and a modern au one as well!

My phone notes are kinda filled with incoherent concepts and rambles about him bc for the longest time I'd get ideas right before bed, or I'd wake up at 2am for some reason and I'd have Inspiration lol

Most of those are either too short or incoherent to really share, or I intend to actually turn them into fics at some point. I do have one that I'll share though bc I'm unsure where/what to use it in since it's mostly just dialogue... idk

"None of what you're doing matters," You tell him.

"Oh?"

"You're human. And even if you manage to carve the humanity out of yourself, to become a god... to what end? Nothing is forever."

His smile is slow, purposeful. "Perhaps. Does it bring you comfort, then, to know that none of this matters?"

When you don't answer, he continues, standing up to take the seat next to the operating table where you lie, instead. "To know that you've suffered for nothing?"

His fingers tap playfully against your sternum, over freshly bandaged sutures, and you hiss in pain. He smiles wider.

It did, you think. Not the thought that your suffering was pointless-- malicious and cruel for the sake of itself-- but the thought that he'll be forgotten with time, as all things are. But there's a glint in his eye now, a look you don't like. The sentiment turns to ash on your tongue, souring in your chest.

"I think I'll take you with me," He says, after a beat. "Since it doesn't matter, in the end."

A tear slides down your cheek and he clicks his tongue, wiping it away with his thumb.

"I need you to understand something," He tells you as he stands from the seat again, going back to what he was doing on the other side of the room, "I will never let you go. Do you understand? You will never see the light of day again. This lab will be the last thing you'll ever see."

Dottore must see the disappointment in your eyes. He clicks his tongue again, feigning sympathy. "But perhaps if you're good, I'll bring you something from the surface. As a reward. Now be quiet; these next tests don't require you to speak, and I don't need your input."

You feel numb.

#asks #i know this is probably a year old gkfjgkd #i wish tumblr would timestamp asks too so ik when they came in.... #my tumblr was logged out for a while #concepts #dottore x reader #yandere #my writing #i'm not gonna tag the hell out of this bc it's a concept lol #anyway for those of you who have played portal (first or second game. doesn't matter) #i imagine his lab much like that #in that it's below the surface #disconnected from the rest of the world #he probably views fresh air from the surface as a luxury and therefore a reward #(re: that one line in portal 2 about recycled air lol) #wait actually did i share this already... #omg i hope not gkdjgkdk #i genuinely cannot remember so lol if i did.... sorry gkdjfkd #maybe i did squeeze it into something... somewhere

[popsicletheduck]

Tumblr has denied me a notif about you answering my ask. Very rude. Anyway i Big Care Mosca and Ash now and ending on Ash calling Mosca kadan took me Out. Pls tell me about their one-sided enemies-to-friends speedrun (or anything else you wanna), I'm all ears (P.s. it doesn't matter when you answer this, could be a while from now and I'd still be interested, i don't wanna drag you into typing up essays for me if you've got more pressing things to put your energy towards!!)

haha, my evil plan to inflict my blorbo feelings on my friend has been a success!! I am an evil genius!! (also, I appreciate the concern, but don't worry, I'm doing exactly what I want to be doing. this brainrot is terminal)

okay, the one-sided enemies-to-friends speedrun, aka the first week or so Mosca and Ash knew each other. I'm gonna try my best to make this readable and coherent and not go off on long tangents, but where the story of the first udaak fight took place mostly over a single session, this story spans many, and draws a lot more on both characters' backstories, so it's probably gonna be a bit more scattered. and longer. definitely longer.

So this story actually starts many months ago (both in and out of game), when Ash first got pulled through a portal from his home world of Thedas to... somewhere else. See, this game is a multiverse game, with characters drawn from a variety of different worlds who ping around the multiverse working to stop chaos on the behalf of a strange group of mutiversal entities called The Quanta. Now, I wasn't there when the game started, so all this information comes courtesy of my good friend who plays Ash. Ash took this transition outwardly pretty damn well, but inwardly... he'd been raised in an anti-magic cult (which is a gross oversimplification of things, but a full explanation would be long and complicated, so this will do), taken from the only home he'd ever known, was now stuck with people who he previously would've considered purposeless things, didn't speak the language particularly well (apparently even worse than currently) and was constantly surrounded by unsettling, fucked up magic. There was a lot going on for him that he lacked the ability to express or anyone he trusted enough to express it to. So he kinda just... sat with it, until slowly things got better. He learned to trust and care about the people he was with, he learned to be less scared of magic (some of the later involved talking to a Skyrim dragon which I wish was a joke but is not).

So time goes on, and we jump forward to the moment Mosca joined the party. See, Mosca also unexpectedly got pulled through a portal, but Mosca got pulled through a portal in the middle of a fight. As in, they were fighting, and a portal appeared and swept towards them, and then on the other side of the portal the party was also in a fight. Which means their introduction to Ash is watching him in a rage use the skull of an undead to kill another undead. It was... memorable to say the least, but not necessarily in a good way (yes Mosca also killed a bunch of undead in that fight, yes one of those kills involved violent decapitation, I never said they weren't a hypocrite).

So Mosca is introduced to the multiverse, and let's just say they don't take the change gracefully. They're not as scared of magic as Ash was (or is), but they don't like it and they don't trust it, and they are suddenly surrounded by it. They had also spent the last six months without seeing another living person, and the change to suddenly being with a party at all times is jarring to say the least. By their second day they're curled up outside a tavern having a panic attack. And the one who ends up sitting with them is Ash. See, Ash understands what it's like to struggle with the transition and sees a lot of himself in Mosca. It's cathartic for him to have someone else who doesn't trust magic, and he has a lot of empathy for them.

Mosca, on the other hand, does not trust him in the slightest. Ash is Big and Strong and Very Clearly A Threat. This is unfortunately and accidentally only amplified by an interaction maybe two days into knowing each other? After another fight in which Mosca is triggered to hell and back by the smell of gunpowder (backstory thing), they end up screaming at Ash to fuck off when he attempts to help. Ash actually takes this fine, but Mosca, once they calm down, is afraid they've made him hate them, which they need him not to do only because their patron is starting to make it clear that they're going to be stuck with these people for at least the foreseeable future. So Mosca goes to apologize. Ash waves the apology off, but in the process of trying to explain why an apology isn't necessary because he understands what they're going through, he ends up explaining what happens to mages in the cult that he was raised in. I'm... not going to explain here because it's... uncomfortable and a bit graphic, but suffice to say, Ash does explain. And Mosca, who previously had been hunted for having magic, takes this very, very badly. In their mind now Ash is a ticking time bomb, that will explode into violence the moment he figures out that they have magic (which they have been attempting to hide... poorly).

So this is where the one-sided enemies-to-friends comes in, because Mosca is convinced that there is a very real possibility of Ash killing them at some future date, while Ash could not be more chill. Mosca is in the corner plotting way to try and fight him if necessary while Ash is just like "neat, new companion, they seem like they might be cool". He is completely unaware that Mosca is terrified of him until...

Well, while traveling the party found a massive, and massively magical, skull, and some of the party decided to fuck around inside said skull and then came out with funky colored eyes and temporary magical bonuses and Mosca, well... kinda snapped.

"Grave of the gods, you're all insane! The only one here who has any sense is him" pointing to Ash, "and he-"

And there they very abruptly cut off, suddenly aware that you shouldn't accuse someone of plotting to kill you. Because either you are right, and they will, or you are wrong, and because of the accusation they then might.

"And he what?" Ash asks. Mosca makes no reply at all, just silence. The party eventually moves on. That night at camp Ash tries again.

"Do we have a problem?"

And Mosca, in one of the worst lies in their life, just says, "No."

Ash is, of course, not fooled by this, but understands there's no trying to talk to them about it now. He's patient. He can wait.

He doesn't have to wait long, because this is where the speedrun comes in. I can't remember the exact timeline, it might've been that night, it might've been a few days later, but not long after all that, Mosca has a dream. They've had a few interactions with the patron, but up to this point their patron hasn't been particularly direct, not since the making of the pact. They are, after all, dying. Their communications have been sparse to nonexistent. But Mosca gets a dream from their patron, where they end up in a cabin sitting across from them, as their patron explains that there are no more living people in their home world. The only thing left are the undead. That's why six months passed without Mosca seeing anyone else. There was no one else to see. Mosca's quest to save their world from the undead has unequivocally failed. And their patron does set them on the path to fixing thing, pointing them in the direction of, essentially, time travel. Reverse time to a point before the undead curse happened and then make sure it doesn't. But in the moment, Mosca can really only focus on the overwhelming weight of their failure and being the last survivor from their whole world.

After this dream they spend two hours alone on watch, stewing in all these feelings. And then the end of their watch comes, and they wake their replacement, who happens to be Ash. And they should just go back to bed, but. They can't. How in the world do you even begin to process something like that?

Well, for Mosca, they ended up spilling it to Ash, just to say it out loud to someone. It's disjointed and awkward and not at all the whole picture, but they tell him they can't go home. That they're the only one left. And he responds by telling them he can't go home either. The cult he grew up in would kill him on sight if they ever found him. And when Mosca explains that they never hated him but that they were scared of him, that they've been running for years from people who want them dead, Ash says that they're part of the group now, so he's going to protect them, and that their problems are the group's problems, and if those people show up, they'll take care of it. And Mosca, in the grip of grief and desperate for any comfort or reassurance, believes him. Maybe not fully, maybe not completely, not yet, but enough to understand that he's not a threat to them, and that he understands what it means for them to have lost their home and be surrounded by magic they're uncomfortable with. And they stand with him on watch for the next couple of hours, but they do so not wearing their mask. The symbol of their paranoia and lack of trust.

Because no matter what else happens (and so much has happened since then) Mosca and Ash's trust in each other is complete and unshakable. For all that Mosca doesn't trust themself, and for all that they believe that Ash shouldn't trust them, he does. And for all that Mosca is a terrible, suspicious bastard who trusts no one, they trust Ash. That, more than anything else, is the foundation for all that has come since, and no matter how often they argue (and boy have they argued), that trust still stands unbreakable.

#mosca #battle bros #multiversal shenanigans #god I hope that made sense "^^ #there were a few bits I had to leave out #mostly to make this coherent in any way shape or form #but this should be the gist of it all #though it does neglect the detail that when mosca went to apologise #ash was in the middle of target practice with his javelins #and upon mosca approaching insisted they try as well #which was definitely the beginning of 'ash deals with mosca having too many feelings by startling them out of it' #mosca convinced ash hates them now: listen- #ash literally shoving a javelin into their hands: you try! #mosca: ??????????

[crystu-cii]

XDD

I f e e l that pain in my soul-- my older sister uses cologne sometimes and it is sO STRONG AND WILL NOT STAY CONFINED TO HER ROOM-- AMD SOMETIMES SHED DO IT IN THE DOORWAY LIKE HELLO-- XDD

YEAH WH GET SOME SLEEP LEAVE THE STAYING UP TO US-- XDD

YES BABY JAIL, INTO THE UPSIDE DOWN LAUNDRY BASKET YOU KNIFE-WIELDING HEATHEN-- XDD oms XDD well I don't know them but I love them- YESSS THEYRE SO FLUFFY-- I'm actually curious what images pop up first imma check-- FLUFFY PUPPIES-- we've actually never owned ones that fluffy(those actually look more similar to shetland sheepdogs than the shelties we've had so far?? Very similar/similar enough where if someone doesn't know a sheltie we mention shetland sheepdogs), our current one is a purebred that we got for free(she was being given away bc her family never came back for her and the lady taking care of her couldn't afford the time to take care of a second dog long-term think) and she's got pretty short fur in comparison- still fluffy enough, but not quite so long of fur-- she's a blue merle(absolutely gorgeous fur, she's like 8 now with a lot of health problems but she's super loving still 💕💞) anyways about the fur, so long as you brush regularly you should mitigate most of that, and it mostly collects in corners- but like.. be prepared to eat and wear dog fur for the rest of your life-- (actually there's a thing called a fur zapper we bought recent that you put in with your clothes when you wash/dry them(I think it's dry but idk??) that's supposed to get a lot of hair off your clothes in that process? Also lint rollers are your best friend--) AND roombas are really helpful(we bought a knockoff one and rarely have to sweep ever so 👀) XDD WHEEZE I can't even imagine what you did-- but like you could ask for a budgie/parakeet /hj I mean, they aren't very expensive (actually they're pretty cheap) but they're very loud, need a lot of attention(especially if you want them to bond to you!) and you need to research into them a lot to make sure you're doing things right-- loads of vids online!! Loads of websites too!!! I'd know I have one- JUST A WARNING, FEATHERS AND SEED HULLS GET ALL OVER YOUR FLOOR XD p l u s like you have a friend who knows stuff about birbs :3 anyways ENOUGH RAMBLING FROM ME WOW THAT GOT LONG--

💕💕 I feel that XD OMS-- I WISH-- WHAT A D R E A M - s n a k - Awww but what a mood XD

XDDD oms YES-- EXACTLY-- XDDDD another good thing you should try eventually is SWEET POTATO CASSEROLE WHICH IS APPARENTLY DELICIOUS??? I TRIED IT FOR THE FIRST TIME(AT LEAST IN A WHILE) TODAY AND IT WAS SO FUCKIN TASTY????

H E A THEN-- XDD how cool of them to try tho :3 whEEZE Y 'A LL-- XDD

WHEEZE I SUCK WITH INSTRUMENTS SOOOO-- DAMN THA'S SOME BAD LUCK MY DUDE-- MAYBE YOU'RE CURSED DAMN-- oms wOWW--

Yesss-- ooh I've never played 👀 seen some stuff but never played-- (see: my computer sucks XD) I h a v e played Portal 1 and it is SO GOOD and SO SHORT and I WISH I HAD GOTTEN PORTAL 2 INSTEAD BUT THATS OKAY CRIES-- YESSSS THE SONGS SLAP--- ALSO THERE ARE ACTUALLY TWO WHOLE MORE CANON(PROBABLY KINDA MAYBE NOT?? IDK) SONGS, ONE FROM A LEG DIMENSIONS GAME("You Wouldn't Know") AND ONE THAT WAS CUT FROM PORT TWO("Don't Say Goodbye"(Harry101UK made an edit to make it Glados' voice!!)) THERE ARE ALSO A BUNCH OF GOOD FAN SONGS SO YEAH-- ALSO NOT TO BE A SIMP BUT GLADOS' VOICE? PERFECTION. I LOVE HER. ALSO I COULD LITERALLY DETAIL THE PORTAL LORE I AM INCREDIBLY EMOTIONALLY INVESTED IN THIS GAME-- ALSO THERES A CLIP THAT SOMEONE MADE USING A (VERY GOOD) GLADOS TTS TO HAVE GLADOS SAY TRANS RIGHTS AND ENBY RIGHTS AND IF I FIND IT AGAIN ILL SEND IT TO YOU-- YOU COULD PROBABLY FIND IT IF YOU LOOM UP GLADOS SAYS TRANS RIGHTS? IT HAS A VIDEO WITH TRANS FLAG COMPANION CUBES ACCOMPANYING IT-- ALSO YES THE PORT MODS(/ADD-ONS? MAYBE? THEY'RE COMMUNITY MADE I THINK BUT IDK ALL I KNOW IS THAT THEYRE COOL AF--) (also I apologize for all the screaming? XD it's like, four am and I was talking about portal so.. whoops?)

Right like wth???? I???? Okay but like December to February babies just fuckin DONT EXIST IN THIS GEN OR SOMETHIN-- CAUSE I FIND N O N E -- Maybe there are more December babies but there are definitely like NO January to February babies it is So Weird--

NEJFQOBGKW WOWW d an g like-p l e a se s t op over sp r aying-- xD and LEGITTTT LIKE- THAT WAS M Y ROLE TO STAY UP LATE- XDD

WHEHEHEZE- LAUNDRY BASKET TIME- G E T I N XDD anD YESS- any doggo is just such a cute doggo 😭💞💞 but for me- fLUFFY ONES ARE WHERE ITS A T- and ohhhh i see- FOR FREE?? W H A T A S T E A L XDD but awwww the poor doggg at least she's with you now ! ;0;; 💞💞😭 aaw such a lovable puppup 😭😭💞 and oHHH i see :00 but oh no- xD i also have a friend that has two dogs and whenever he would give me gifts- there would be dog hair on them no matter what- XDD and ooOhhh those sound really helpful! omg- i swear i dont have to have a pet for the need of a roomba- i already shed so much hair myself its so crazy-- xDD and oH MAN loud animals are really gon get my mom fired up- and OO birds just look so cuteee i always fantasize of having one- but then again- with the noise and all xD the more i think about it i dont think we are prepared to have a pet at all xD but i still dream of at least having one pet in my lifetime!

and OO that sounds awesome!! i have no clue if i even tried casserole before- man- sometimes i just eat food without even knowing wth it is XDDD but THAT SOUNDS so gooodddd :O

and LEGITT LIKE- TF IS HAPPENING WITH MY SCHOOL LIFE- XDD and oh my god- IT GETS WORSE- that year there was a FREAKINGG FIREEEEEEE- it wasnt that dangerous thank god- but it had to get a whole ass room renovated because of it- and guess what room it was- THE ORCHESTRA ROOM- AND GUESS WHAT M A D E I T W OR SE- that year- it was the first time the school replaced those 10+ year old instruments with new ones- NOW THEYRE B U R N T- and mind you that the school's budget isnt so- gr e a t- like oh my god i am still so bewildered over HOW MUCH chaos HAPPENED that year- and i thought that year was gon be the year- yknow? like UGH

and OHH MANN playing portal sounds awesome! but i just dont think the game would be worth my money cause i know the plot- and even with the mods and all my brain would be broken as i would possibly have no clue what to do- xDDD

and HOOOO MANNN game fan songs are just so AWESOMEEE- and those sound pretty cool! :OO and HOLY SHIT FUCK YEAH- GLADOS SAYS TRANS AND ENBY RIGHTS Y A LL- now im gonna look that up and let my ears be blessed by such words- XDDD and DONT WORRY BOUT SCREAMING ALOT- i scream a whole dam lot too XDD

and LEGITTT- finding someone's b-day in january and feb is so rare all of a sudden like wh a t - XDD

#the rambles of crystu #even tho we are legit friends on discord- ima still answer these XDDD