#and then um like the moon burst like a balloon (honestly looked like jean jacket in nope)

[autoneurotic]

i know i’ve talked about my horrifyingly vivid nightmares on here before (and definitely in therapy!) but like. how on earth do you stop them. i’m not anxious in my waking life, the anti anxiety/sleep medication i take just gives me different kinds of vivid nightmares. what’s a guy to do

#my therapist was just like. yeah! dreams are nuts we don’t really know what’s up with them #like ok! why WHY why are mine LIKE THIS. usually it’s tight #but i’m dreaming only about like. my family and it’s god fucking awful #had one the other night i was in a. space station w my dad and mama and i checked my phone #and we all had missed calls from my sister and a voicemail that was like well! the world is ending and i’m still here! love you all! #and then um like the moon burst like a balloon (honestly looked like jean jacket in nope) #and that fucked with gravity and sucked our ship round and round closer to the sun #ones where my mom isn’t my mom she’s some scary awful dream mom #sometimes she leaves me behind or won’t let me come home #or sometimes she’s being sooo mean to my sister and it makes me so sad #and none of it is REAL! #we all love each other we’re all on good terms i miss the hell out of my sister n mom who are in different states #but AHHHHH it fucks with me #i had one last night that my partner died #which is a real life fear of mine. i don’t know what i would do if anything happened to him #n in my dream i was talking to someone about and saw an old couple walk by holding hands #and my loss and heartbreak felt SO REAL..like that should be US old and in love! #AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH