#and then Sakuya blushed a little and i cried because this is my son and i want to hold him.

[icharchivist]

after a fun day reminiscing about how fun a3 is, i’m just getting a wave of sadness again from the closure of the EN server. I know that catching up with the JPN server would just be ideal but there’s something very eerie about seeing the characters i’ve spent my daily life with, with the feeling of time passing by, having so much more experience than where i last left them and it feels overwhelming to catch up essentially 4 years of content. Not to mention always the bittersweetness of really seeing just how far this journey had taken them.

I just really miss a3 and the daily aspect of it, i miss my children, i want to hold them so bad. I love them so much. Guh. 

#i wish i had the energy to catch up #i barely even have the energy to keep on with the reread i started :sob: #life got insanely busy all at once and my energy hits a new low every day so it makes it a bit depressing #but on the other hand i was watching the trailer for the new anni event #and just got filled with intense sorrow as they were talking about how much experience they built over the years #and then Sakuya blushed a little and i cried because this is my son and i want to hold him. #could imagine the High of reliving moments that made me happy just ends up swinging into the low of missing it so damn much #sighs. i'll catch up. one day. I'll get there. I gotta. For my kids. #but man i wish the EN server never closed... #ichatalks about a3 #i miss my stupid kids and i miss rambling about them. Alright.