#and look i know it's quaint for the 70s schlock guy to say that sort of stuff but this never tried to be schlock

[sol-flo]

do NOT let anyone fool you: there's no biomechanical horror in titane. i repeat. the movie where the woman fucks the car has no biomechanical horror in it. there is no biomechanical immaculate conception as horror.

#i don't think it's a very good movie thematically and it was exhausting to watch #i wouldnt say 'god this movie sucks' but i do think it's mostly prestige covering up a weak story #and look i know it's quaint for the 70s schlock guy to say that sort of stuff but this never tried to be schlock #i'm not entirely sure what it was trying to be at all! #it's 2-3 undercooked movies in one of those two people horse costumes and each half is trying to do something different #it could have been fun as something original forking from the first few scenes (dunno why bc i had no idea what to expect) #it would have been extremely fun as a silly little slasher origin story #even the whole 'cross dressing and pretending to be some guy's long lost son' could have been a (questionable) psychological horror premise #but like what the fuck is this. im sure shes a competent director (the movie is mostly a good movie in other regards) but girl #girl what the fuck is this you have to choose something to say. like girl what are you even fucking saying!! #i think its funny she said alexia was meant to be impossible to relate to or something but honestly she slayed in the beginning #if it was a slasher flick she'd have been spectacular