#and in 1996 when steve and eddie are expecting their first kid - a daughter

[formosusiniquis]

y'know like barbie

ao3

It's Erica who gives him the idea, incidentally. Though she carries herself with a maturity that far surpasses the boys most days and though she's been through multiple life altering events, she does continue to only be eleven. Which is, it turns out, prime babysitting age.

The Sinclairs are going out of town overnight, it's their anniversary -- 18 blissful years, since our marriage can vote we thought we deserved a night away -- and they don't want Erica to spend the night home alone.

Enter Steve, who the Sinclairs trust with their children and who is inexplicably the only person Erica would accept staying the night with her. Steve honestly didn't believe it even as Mrs. Sinclair was saying it. But he smiles and nods, looks over the emergency numbers on the fridge when they're pointed to, nods at the money on the counter for food that he probably won't take, and waves as they walk out the door promising that he and Erica will be fine for the night and not to worry.

It's only when their car is out of the driveway and the door is shut that Steve realizes he isn't really a babysitter. He is a keep children alive while in a dangerous situation and when the situation is over drive them around because you feel bad that their childhoods have been marred by trauma-er which doesn't have quite the same ring as babysitter, and it's a lot harder to say with that rude tone the boys have been favoring. He also realizes that he's never actually dealt with children, or not girl children. The boys had all been older than Erica, when he had started keeping them alive. Max was definitely basically a teenager when he started really dealing with her; and she was usually okay to do what the boys wanted to do, like go to the arcade. Hopper didn't really trust him with El and that was fine, he wasn't sure he trusted himself with El either.

It put him in an awkward spot now though. Staring at Erica in her kitchen, a little afraid to ask the question on the front of his mind which was "What now?"

So he asks the second question on his mind, "What do you want to do that isn't eat ice cream all night?"

Say what you will about Steve Harrington, and a lot has been said, but he always keeps his promises and he always brings a pint of ice-cream for Erica to have when he comes over to the Sinclair house. Tonight he brought three, all different weird flavors he thought she'd like to try.

"Why can't I eat ice cream all night?" She says it with a challenge in her eyes, but he'd bet dollars to donuts that she's just doing it to make him sweat. "Because I've seen you eat ice cream, we've only got enough for two hours at most." His hand migrates as if of its own mind to his hip. "You need more than two people for Dungeons and Dragons, right?"

Her brows raise, for the first time since he's met her Erica Sinclair is stunned silent. Maybe she's just surprised he got the name right.

It lasts about as long as it takes him to notice it. "You'd play Dungeons and Dragons with me?" There's something fragile in the way she asks, and there is the eleven year old girl she's meant to be. 

"Sure, you'd have to show me how, but if that's what you want to do I'm game."

Eyes narrowed in a distinctly intimidating way he kind of thinks she stole from Nancy, he does his best to make his sincerity clear on his face. "We need more than two people, but I've got something else we can do if you think your fragile manhood can take it."

He's got a retort at the tip of his tongue about just what his manhood can take and remembers just in time that yeah probably shouldn't make a joke like that in front of an actual child. "My pride isn't that delicate, I think I can handle anything you dish out."

"Famous last words."

He follows her to her bedroom, waiting outside the doorway to let her space stay private until he's told to come in. A clear plastic tub slides out from under her bed, out of sight but easily accessible and when the lid pops off he gets why. Rows of Barbies stacked neatly on top of each other, a mass grave for childhood. Steve has a stuffed bear, fur rubbed off of one ear, tucked up on the shelf of his closet that also got put away sooner than he would have chosen to, when it was too babyish.

“Alright, so who is the, like, elven warrior.”

“That’s not how you play Barbies.”

It’s snapped so fast that he thinks it embarasses her. He tactfully avoids eye contact, pulling out a doll with blonde hair snipped into a professional, if uneven, bob and a green skirt set. She's missing a shoe. “Then how do I play Barbies?”

“That one just won the Nobel Peace Prize, she solved world hunger, but she has plans to kill the Barbie who won the prize in Physics because she stole Barbie One’s research and gave it to NASA claiming it was her own.”

“Right, of course.” This was the kind of shit that happened on Dallas, only Barbie had a lot more awards. “And they’re all called Barbie?”

“Except for Ken, but Ken doesn’t do anything.”

“Well if Barbie just won the Peace Prize wouldn’t she use Ken to kill Barbie so she doesn’t get caught.”

Erica manages a look that is both condescending and considerate. “Barbie can do anything, including get away with murder; but she wouldn’t want to dirty her hands with that sort of thing.”

“And if Ken goes to jail it’s no loss.”

“Right.”

-

So maybe it's more accurate to say that Dustin actually starts it.

Dustin with the shittiest attitude this side of the Ohio, something Robin blames him for.

“Like father, like son.”

“Dustin doesn’t even know his dad.”

“I mean you and Eddie, dingus.”

“I am not that kid's dad. A brotherly figure at best, strong male role model more likely.”

“He’s a bitch because you are, Steve. Maybe if your and Eddie’s love language wasn’t being as bitchy as possible it wouldn’t have rubbed off on your kid.”

“Please don’t put Dustin and rubbing off in the same paragraph let alone the same thought wave.”

Dustin comes sprinting into Family Video on a Tuesday afternoon. “Steve! I need your car.”

“Did you learn how to drive when I wasn’t paying attention?”

“Obviously, I meant I need you too.” His hands are on his hips, eyes rolled. Shit maybe he did get it from Steve. “There’s this theoretical physicist coming to Notre Dame to give a talk on the Multiverse Theory.”

Steve was allowing himself a second to consider whether this was worth it, for once, instead of just blindly agreeing to drive Dustin wherever. The drive sucked ass, but it would put him close enough to Chicago that he could try to find a music store that would carry albums from the international metal bands Eddie couldn’t stop talking about.

It was a second too long for Dustin. “Steve, a theoretical physicist-”

See Steve had this suspicion that the kids did actually think he was an idiot. He was pretty sure that none of them, hell maybe none of Hellfire, save for Lucas realized that every athlete in the school had to keep up at least a 2.5 GPA. Which might not have been anything to write home about but Steve kept a 3.2 for most of high school, until the multiple concussions started to catch up with him. He wasn’t stupid, was the point and even if they didn’t think he was an idiot in a mean way he was a little sick of the shit.

“I know, like Barbie.”

That shuts Dustin up real quick.

“N- no, not like Barbie! Barbie is some girl's toy.”

“Excuse me?” Robin, who told Steve that she would not help him parent his children on work days or any other day ending in y had remembered that Martes doesn’t have one and her shift was almost over. “What does that mean, exactly, a girl’s toy?”

“And,” Steve adds, because he can and because Eddie made him drive him to fucking Bloomington because he was fixated on time travel and needed access to some science journal that only existed at Indiana U apparently, “Barbie is on a research team looking for the Higgs particle so she can start figuring out time travel.”

The bell chiming as Dustin leaves has never sounded sweeter.

He’ll definitely end up taking the twerp to stupid Notre Dame.

-

The thing is that Steve thinks he’s never really stopped being a bitch.

He doesn’t want to stop. He likes being bitchy. It’s fun, when you’re doing it with people you like it’s pretty funny, and honestly he’s kinda like Spiderman. With great power comes great responsibility, he’s only bitchy responsibly now.

And it’s actually perfectly responsible as an older brother type babysitter figure to correct the behavior of the younger siblings by being bitchy. If they don’t learn at home they’ll go out in the world thinking that kind of behavior is acceptable, see Steve Harrington in his early high school days who talked to people like his father did.

So when Mike interrupts El with, “I’m not going to ask Steve, he probably doesn’t even know what a Pulitzer is either.”

He says, “Oh, yeah like Barbie won. Or Nancy will someday, probably. It’s a journalism award, Wheeler.”

And when Lucas corrects, “I don’t actually think you can win an award for comics. It’s still really great though, Will!”

“Barbie won the Kirby Award in 1985 for best artist, I’m sure Will is soon to follow.”

Or when Nancy tells Holly, “Are you sure you wouldn’t want to be something important instead?”

“You could be an actress and do something cool like go to space if you want, Hols, like Barbie.” And maybe he says it with a little more bitch than he should that time, but he’s seen the ballerinas in Nancy’s room, she didn’t always want to be an investigative journalist.

It gets to be second nature. When someone starts being shitty about something or to lighten the mood.

Erica doubts whether she should run for student council. It's her first step to being actual president, like Barbie.

Dustin makes a crack about Steve's possible future prospects when he butts in on a conversation between Steve and Robin. "I could do all three, I could be a counselor and a hair stylist and an engineer. Maybe I'll add EMT too, Barbie wouldn't stop at three, why should I?"

Or when Mike sneers at him, "What are you a cop?" All because Steve told him not to buy weed now that Eddie had stopped dealing.

"Ew, no, because you look like a fresh-faced little narc trying to be cool and you're gonna get ripped off."

"What so not like Barbie?"

"The Barbie world has achieved equality at a level that it doesn't need the cops." Eddie sometimes has to get high after a run in with Powell or Calahan who he still doesn't really trust after the spring. Steve has been treated to many a lecture on why the police were a waste of resources.

He lets Mike sit with that for a minute before he adds, "Like Barbie, I am very cool and know what it looks like when I'm being taken for a ride. If you're gonna get pot from someone other than Eddie, ask Hop where he used to get all of his shit."

It doesn't feel stupid, until El comes running into the cabin one afternoon that Steve has decided to join the rebuilding effort. It’s actually just him and Hop, who has started trying to quietly parent him, something he’s not entirely convinced isn’t revenge for telling Wheeler that Hop has smoked pot before. Steve is pretty sure El was crying when she came in, something he bumps up to a certainty when he sees how awkward Hop looks right now.

“You mind taking that kid? It’s been a long time since high school.” he rubs the back of his neck, Steve does appreciate that he has the decency to feel weird about asking. “If it’s anything outside of big brother shit I can take over.”

He does let himself get suckered by that big brother line.

El is facedown on her bed in a clear ‘leave me alone I’m crying’ pose but he figures he’s already here it’s not like he can turn around and tell Hop that he was too afraid to approach a crying teenage girl. Like that wasn’t the whole reason he’d been sent in the first place. “Hey Ellie, can I come in?”

She sits up, tear tracks plain on her face but no more are falling, and nods in that endearing, aggressively certain way she’s got. “Is everything okay?” He pauses and asks, “Was it Mike?” because he knows that’ll be the first thing Hopper asks when Steve comes back out.

“You are worse than Dad.”

“That stings, Ellie Bell.”

She takes a deep breath, steeling an already impressive will, “Lucas says it is okay to just want to be happy right now, but all they talk about is what they are going to do. Dustin is talking about going to admission early, Will talks about talking to Dad and Joyce about art school, Lucas worries about his sports and scholarships, and Mike talks about classes that count twice. I do not know what I want to be. I do not know why I have to be anything.”

“You guys have been through a lot. I don’t think anyone would blame you for taking time to just be a kid.”

“What if I never want to be something? What if I do not ever want to go to college?”

He’s made his way over to the bed with her, sits tentatively on the edge like he’s seen Joyce do before. “Then you don’t. You’ll probably have to get a job at some point, but that doesn’t have to be what you are. Lucas isn’t a landscaper just because he mows lawns in the summer.”

“You don’t think Dad would be upset?” she asks.

“I don’t think there’s anything you could do that would really make Hop mad. And you might change your mind. I've been out of school for almost two years and I’m only thinking about college now. Or you could go to college and change your mind about what you want to be. You could be a hundred things, you could be anything! Like Barbie.”

He feels like an idiot almost immediately. A jerk quickly after that. He’s made El’s genuine crisis part of his stupid running joke. But something settles in the room. The underlying tension, the thing that had the hair on the back of his neck raised. He realizes, now, that her powers had probably also been on edge.

"Like Barbie." She says it with a graven seriousness, like Steve's dumb little joke is a mantra now.

"Yeah, and you're a sophomore you don't have to have your whole life figured out right now. And don't take life advice from Henderson anyway, he thought it was a good idea to raise an Upside Down slug as a pet."

He mostly just used it to be a bitch though. Because it was fun. No, it was what he was good at. So good at it he didn't even have to try.

Because Steve had a plan to be bitchy. Specifically to Mike Wheeler who kept flirting with Steve’s boyfriend while taking advantage of his hospitality. Sure it was at their stupid Dungeons and Dragons game, and yeah Steve was the one who said they could host the game at his house now that Eddie had graduated. Yes, he knew Eddie didn't mean anything by it when he responded and usually didn't flirt back with the kids. But it was still the kind of behavior that had to be gently corrected, for Mike's sake because if he didn't stop things were going to get drastic.

His initial plan is already in action. He encouraged El to come along to watch the Party play. It was, admittedly, a half hearted plan. Wheeler got so awkward anytime El was around he mostly just hoped that would keep him from trying anything.

It isn't. Eddie starts to describe a new character, "Blonde and statuesque, she has a long bow in hand and delicate elven features."

And even though El is sitting a few feet from him Mike perks up the way he always does when there's a new NPC to flirt with. He is going to have to have a talk with Eddie about letting the kid try out a bard.

He does at least have one other tool in his belt. "Oh, like Barbie."

Steve knew what he'd get as he said it. A groan from Dustin, who falls for this as being sincere about as often as he falls for the dumb-dumbs and dipshits line -- which is everytime for the record. Will and Lucas keep their laughs small, enough that they're covered by Erica's snort. The original Hellfire crew mostly looks confused, it's becoming less and less their default as they warm up to the Steve he is rather than the Steve they thought they remembered; but he likes to keep them on their toes.

Eddie is charmed. He can tell. Sees him duck his head behind his screen and his binders, trying to preserve the stern and scary dungeon master image. That apparently isn't possible if you're smiling like an idiot at your stupid boyfriend, so he's been told.

And Mike has maybe been on the wrong end of the joke a few more times than everyone else. He turns an interesting shade of red, two parts anger and one part embarrassed is Steve's guess. The foot stomp is unexpected, but he expects its been passed down the Wheeler line as a shared signal of outrage. "Not like Barbie, this isn't some stupid kids game. She's probably a hot, wisened archer ready to reward us for helping her village, not some stupid doll that you're obsessed with."

Eddie's blank face with the twitchy eyes has fallen into place when he sits back up from behind his screen. His things aren't going according to plan, panicked face. "I think that's a good place to end things this week. Wheeler, Henderson, Jeff, and Lady Applejack you've all cleared enough experience to level right? Do that before next week."

Steve knows enough to keep his mouth shut while everyone packs up to leave. Sends a small smile to Erica on her way out to the family minivan, he knows she struggles a little being the youngest at the table even if she won't say it. He has to imagine that the outburst had stung a bit.

"You gotta be nicer to little Wheeler." Eddie chides once everyone is gone, halfhearted at best when he's telling Steve off into the soft skin of his neck. When he feels the admonishment more than hears it.

"I'm not mean to Mike." He says on instinct, he does try not to be. "And he started it."

"Definitely think you started the Barbie thing, Sweetheart."

And well, yeah. "I Barbie all the kids equally."

Eddie hmms Steve can feel the vibration of it through his back and on his neck. Eddie is about to start something he better plan on finishing. "He asked Hop where he should get weed."

Oh. "I didn't think he'd actually do it!" And then, "Is that why he keeps flirting with you, revenge?"

"No, he's got a bunch of misplaced jealousy because Will and the girls think you're hot." He toys with the edge of Steve's shirt as he says it. Perpetually cold fingers brushing the clothes warmed skin beneath making him shiver.

"The girls don't think I'm hot."

He hums again, nips at the blush red skin at Steve's neck. "El used to, Max definitely has a taste for jock.

"That's not my fault, you let Mike play a bard." He wishes he didn't sound so desperate.

"Wanted to leave the Paladin spot open for you, baby."

"I'm starting to feel convinced, we could go upstairs and you could show me your character sheet."

The things he'll say to get laid.

"Don't think I can do that Stevie, smooth as a Ken doll down there. Could show you the actual character sheet though." 

His back is cold as Eddie pulls away, smirking unrepentant as he lets Steve have the tiniest taste of his own medicine.

"Barbie has a very active sex life, actually." He's never been one not to double down. "Let me show you the fun we can have without getting your dick out."

-

He does leave it alone for a little while, even though he really, really doesn't want to. But despite what his friends, his fifth grade report card, and his mom might think; Steve is capable of keeping a hold of his worst impulses when he wants to.

So he lets opportunity pass him by.

He makes no comment about Barbie when Eddie talks about how John Carpenter is a film auteur. Not even when Dustin tries to define auteur for him. Incorrectly, but Robin comes to Steve's defense.

Barbie goes unmentioned, barely when an argument breaks out about Nobel prize winners, of all things. He thinks the kids argue more now than they ever have like it's the only way they have to get their bloodlust out now that the Upside Down was closed. He was quickly boxed out of the conversation, even if Erica kept sending him little glances over everyone's heads. (She'd let him have Peace Prize Barbie a couple weeks ago and maybe he was a little obsessed.)

Holly wants to be a vet now, a singing vet who is also on TV, but mostly a vet. She tells him all about it while he waits for Mike to find his shoes? Definitely not his quarters for the arcade, the day any of them bring those is the day Steve brings the nail bat back out. He’s one impulse purchase away from getting one of those little coin dispenser belts that the employees have -- Gareth just quit, maybe he still had his? Mike's frown is a little less general annoyance at Steve and a little more confusion when he's finally ready to leave and Barbie has gone unmentioned.

He almost breaks again when Eddie starts talking about sports. Or he starts talking about NASCAR which is close enough for Eddie, he has a surprising taste for racing for someone who never wanted to put his van on the starting line at parties. A woman led a Busch Series race for the first time, what a year '86. He's got no opinion on Barbie's ability to drive at all.

He could let a joke go. He could be nice. It wasn't so out of character that it needed this kind of attention.

-

Mike has forgiven him by the time the next session rolls around. Delayed two weeks after Eddie screamed so loud on stage that he couldn't speak for two days, and then again for Jeff's emergency appendectomy. Eddie has stopped leaving pointed gaps in conversation for Steve to fill with mention of Barbie, he has had his thinking face on instead which is good for Steve about as often as it isn't.

He leaves it alone. A little bit of non-life threatening surprise is good for the soul, or something. Listen, he’s made it this far by only asking questions when shit is about to get really, really bad and Eddie’s thinking face has only resulted in something bad once or twice -- and they probably should have spent more than a couple minutes negotiating that particular kink anyway.

When the kids start showing up and nothing has come from the thinking face, he assumes it was just for them anyway. He settles in to see whatever shit Eddie is going to do.

"From the ditch you pull a human man, a paladin. His plate is dirtied by his time on the ground but clearly gleams in its typical state. He's handsome, a square jaw and fluffy brown hair-"

"Ugh is this Steve? You already made us do a quest for him," Mike complains, maybe he hasn’t completely forgiven Steve for that last interruption.

Steve has, by his own count been the inspiration for at least three NPCs for this campaign: a white light faction rogue, Sol, that the party had to rescue from the dungeons of the nightmare King after he was caught sneaking into the bedrooms of the prince -- like it was Steve's fault that Wayne had super hearing; a young fighter from the gladiatorial combat ring who helped the party rescue a group of kidnapped children that were going to be used as bait in the next round of fights; and the most obvious Prince Stefan who sent the party on a quest to kill his betrothed a Duke called Thomas the Boarish and rescue his knight Rowen and beloved Bard Edwin -- it's not like he could unkiss Tommy, and he could be a dick but boarish was dramatic. 

He was not this paladin, assuming Eddie was telling the truth about saving the Paladin he'd made for Steve.

"Cut the out of character chatter, Michael, before it starts counting in game. The Paladin before you is handsome in a bland, approachable, non-threatening way," Mike opens his mouth again, how is that not like Steve surely perched at the edge of his tongue and stopped in its tracks by elbows from Erica and Joey. "He introduces himself to his rescuer, Will the Wise, 'Thank you, kind sir, I would have been down there for ages before my lady noticed my absence. I am Sir Kenneth.'"

"What deity does he serve?" Will asks, something suspicious drawing across his face.

"Is there a holy symbol on his armor?" Gareth follows up. Gareth has been backing a lot of Will's plays lately, Steve thinks something might be going on there but he hasn't wanted to deal with Eddie teasing him for being a meddling matchmaker, again.

"There is no identifiable holy symbol on his clothes or armor." Eddie says, there's a mischief in his eyes, the way he tilts his head with quiet challenge and smiles.

"What God do you serve?" Erica asks, blunt and to the point. She gets cranky when her rogue doesn't have anything to stab.

"'The Lady in Pink,' he answers."

Any time Eddie reveals lore shit there's always a bunch of people talking over top of each other. It always turns into the kind of mass blob of shouting that Steve has a hard time parsing out, especially these days. Eddie somehow manages to distinguish not only people but the things they're saying and keeps his cool enough to keep the story going.

"Roll your insight, Gareth. Jeff, with a 15 history check, you have heard some whisperings from your homeland about a newly ascended goddess but not a name. Dustin, you're not getting shit with a 5 don't even try that but my back story says shit with me. Will, pretty sure that's a cleric spell but I'll let you have it he's a Neutral Good alignment. An 18, shit, yeah Garebear he does seem to be telling the truth that is the deity he follows; but that isn't the whole truth, you know a lot of the newer pantheon have a colloquial name and a true name."

"I'm sorry," Lucas says, "we aren't familiar with your lady. What can you tell us about her? Why would she leave you there? And that's a 14 on persuasion before you even ask."

"Why would I have asked that, Sinclair the elder? He has stars in his eyes when he speaks, 'before she ascended she was already limitless. A powerful warrior, an expert marksman, a mage beyond compare. Her power grew and grew until the only place left to explore was godhood.'"

"And what's her real name, if we wanted to spread the word?" Joey asks.

"'Oh she's everything. She's the lady in pink, she's the goddess with the golden mane, but before she ascended she favored one name I assume she has kept it.'"

"What is it?" Mike asks, perched at the edge of his seat.

"Oh no," Dustin whispers, a dawning horror on his face.

"'Barbara, though she preferred it shortened. Nicknames you call them," Steve sees the joke, knows where this is going a split second before reality breaks through the haze of fantasy for the players around the table. Eddie's smirking now, smile too pleased and too attractive. "'Y'know like Barbie?'"

#steddie #steve harrington #steddie fic #and in 1996 when steve and eddie are expecting their first kid - a daughter #erica gifts them the barbie camper so steve has something while he waits for the real thing #listen you know that oh like barbie post with the steve speaking image below it #i saw that and this happened #i just wanted to try out a little steve and erica bonding #and it turned into steve being a bitchy big brother #steve and eddies love language is being dicks #but their secondary love language is not letting the bit die and i do believe that #so eddie had to take it up when steve set it down

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HBO Max January 2021 Slate

HBO Max has announced it’s January 2021 slate:

Spread the word, Upper Eastsiders — all six seasons of “Gossip Girl” are coming to HBO Max on January 1st. The month also brings the film premiere of Locked Down starring Anne Hathaway and Chiwetel Ejiofor, the second special episode of the Emmy®-winning drama “Euphoria,” the season four return of the beloved “Search Party,” and the two-part documentary “Tiger,” which illuminates the rise, fall and epic comeback of global golf icon Tiger Woods. Selena Gomez is back for seconds with a new season of “Selena + Chef,” and HBO Max is also serving up new episodes of “Looney Tunes Cartoons,” “Batman Beyond” and “Batman the Animated Series.”

On January 29, John Lee Hancock’s suspenseful psychological thriller “The Little Things” starring Academy Award winners Denzel Washington, Rami Malek and Jared Leto, premieres in theaters around the country and on HBO Max the same day. “The Little Things” will be available on HBO Max for 31 days from its theatrical release in the U.S. included at no additional cost to subscribers.

The third season of Italian crime drama “Gomorrah“ also joins the platform alongside both seasons of “Warrior” from Cinemax.

Catch up on the first season of the post-apocalyptic sci-fi thriller “Snowpiercer” when it arrives on HBO Max this month ahead of its Season 2 premiere on TNT. Or queue up a lineup of A-List movies including “The King of Staten Island,” the “Ocean’s” trilogy and “Ocean’s 8,” “The Notebook,” and Quentin Tarantino’s “Kill Bill: Vol 1″ & 2, “Pulp Fiction” and “Reservoir Dogs.“

And just a reminder as we get ready to ring in the new year: New and returning subscribers can sign up for a pre-paid offer and get 6 months of HBO Max at a discounted rate of $69.99 plus applicable taxes. Find out more at HBOMax.com.

TITLES COMING TO HBO MAX IN JANUARY

Exact Dates to be Announced:

Arthur’s Law, Max Original Series Premiere

The unemployed Arthur Ahnepol (Jan Josef Liefers) ekes out a bleak existence. Drawn from the strains of his unhappy marriage and bored to death, he makes a morbid plan: he wants his obnoxious wife to die. With the money from the life insurance there’s no obstacle for a restart with his beloved mistress. But an unwritten law dominates the life of the unlucky fellow: every problem solved by Arthur has a far worse effect. And so, he sets off an avalanche of disastrous events.

The Event, Max Original Series Premiere

An unprecedented look behind the scenes of the extraordinary events created by Wolfgang Puck Catering and legendary restaurateur Wolfgang Puck. From Renegade 83, each one-hour episode will follow various members of Puck’s team as they strive to amaze clients and surpass even the highest expectations.

Locked Down, Max Original Film Premiere

Just as they decide to separate, Linda (Anne Hathaway) and Paxton (Chiwetel Ejiofor) find life has other plans when they are stuck at home in a mandatory lockdown. Co-habitation is proving to be a challenge, but fueled by poetry and copious amounts of wine, it will bring them closer together in the most surprising way.

Perfect Life (fka Vida Perfecta), Max Original Season 1 Premiere

Maria, Esther and Cristina are three women in the middle of a life crisis. They have realized that the plans they had made for themselves haven’t really gotten them the long-promised happiness they yearned for. Together, they will find alternatives and make decisions that will lead them away from what society expects from them. They will soon realize that life doesn’t necessarily have to be what they always imagined.

Possessions, HBO Max Season 1 Premiere

The series tells the story of Natalie, a young French expatriate in Israel, who is charged with the murder of her husband on their wedding night. Karim, a French diplomat in charge of helping French citizens who have to deal with the Israeli authorities, slowly falls for Natalie. He cannot figure out whether the young lady is deeply lost and vulnerable, or dangerously manipulative. Obsessed with this case, Karim dives into Natalie and her family’s mysterious past.

Selena + Chef, Max Original Season 2 Premiere

The unscripted cooking series features the multi-platinum selling recording artist, actress, producer, entrepreneur, and philanthropist as she navigates unfamiliar territory: making delicious meals while stuck at home in quarantine.

January 1: 12 oz. Mouse, Seasons 1 & 2 42nd Street, 1933 All the President’s Men, 1976 Apple & Onion, Season 1B The Autobiography Of Miss Jane Pittman, 1974 (HBO) Batman Begins, 2005 Batman Beyond Batman Beyond: The Return of the Joker, 2000 Batman: Bad Blood, 2016 Batman: Death in the Family, 2020 Batman: Hush, 2019 Batman: The Animated Series Blade, 1998 A Better Life, 2011 (HBO) Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, 2005 Dog Day Afternoon, 1975 Check It Out! with Steve Brule Chinatown, 1974 Codename: Kids Next Door The Color Purple, 1985 The Conjuring, 2013 Courage the Cowardly Dog Craig of the Creek, Season 2 The Crocodile Hunter: Collision Course, 2002 (HBO) The Dark Knight, 2008 The Dark Knight Rises, 2012 Dim Sum Funeral, 2009 (HBO) Ed, Edd n Eddy El Amor No Puede Esperar (Aka Love Can’t Wait), 2021 (HBO) Happy Feet, 2006 The Electric Horseman, 1979 (HBO) Escape from New York, 1981 The Exorcist, 1973 Flashpoint, 1984 (HBO) The General’s Daughter, 1999 (HBO) Gossip Girl Green Lantern, 2011 Green Lantern: The Animated Series Gremlins , 1984 Gremlins 2: The New Batch, 1990 The Grim Adventures of Billy & Mandy Happily N’Ever After, 2007 (HBO) Happily N’Ever After 2: Snow White, 2009 (HBO) Happy-Go-Lucky, 2008 (HBO) He Said She Said, 1991 (HBO) Heaven Help Us, 1985 (HBO) The Infamous Future, 2018 Jay And Silent Bob Strike Back, 2001 (HBO) The Jellies Justice League Dark: Apokolips War, 2020 Kong: Skull Island, 2017 Little Con Lili, 2021 (HBO) Loiter Squad Ma, 2019 (HBO) Mad Max 2: The Road Warrior, 1983 Mad Max: Fury Road, 2015 Magic Mike, 2012 Mao Mao, Heroes of Pure Heart March of the Penguins, 2005 Margaret, 2011 (Extended Version) (HBO) Miracle On 34th Street, 1994 (HBO) Miss Firecracker, 1989 (HBO) Mulholland Dr., 2001 Mystic River, 2003 Nitro Circus: The Movie 3D, 2012 (HBO) No Country for Old Men, 2007 The Notebook, 2004 Ocean’s 8, 2018 Ocean’s Eleven , 2001 Ocean’s Thirteen, 2007 Ocean’s Twelve, 2004 Pee-wee’s Big Adventure, 1985 Piter, 2021 (HBO) The Producers, 1968 Pulp Fiction, 1994 Purple Rain, 1984 Ready Player One, 2018 Revenge Of The Nerds, 1984 (HBO) Revenge Of The Nerds II: Nerds In Paradise, 1987 (HBO) Revenge Of The Nerds IV: Nerds In Love, 2005 (HBO) Rollerball, 2002 (HBO) Se7en, 1995 Shallow Hal, 2001 (HBO) Snowpiercer, Season 1 A Star is Born , 2018 Superman: Doomsday, 2007 Superman: Man of Tomorrow, 2020 Superman Returns, 2006 Swimfan, 2002 (HBO) This Is Spinal Tap, 1984 The Three Stooges, 2012 (HBO) TMNT, 2007 Tom Goes to the Mayor The Trouble With Spies, 1987 (HBO) Underclassman, 2005 (HBO) V for Vendetta, 2005 Van Wilder: Freshman Year (Extended Version), 2009 (HBO) Walk Of Shame, 2014 (HBO) Warrior, Seasons 1 & 2 (HBO) Willard, 1971 (HBO) Worth Winning, 1989 (HBO) You Can Count On Me, 2000 (HBO)

January 2: The High Note, 2020 (HBO)

January 4: 30 Coins, Series Premiere (HBO)

January 8: Patriot’s Day, 2016 Scream, 1996 Squish, Season 1

January 9: The Alienist: Angel of Darkness, Season 2 Ben 10, Season 4A The King Of Staten Island, 2020 (HBO)

January 10: Miracle Workers, Season 2 Tiger, Two-Part Documentary Premiere (HBO)

January 12: Against The Wild, 2014 Against the Wild 2: Survive the Serengeti, 2016 Alpha and  Omega 5: Family Vacation, 2015 Alpha and Omega 6: Dino Digs, 2016 Batkid Begins: The Wish Heard Around the World, 2015 Blue Valentine, 2010 Book of Shadows: Blair Witch 2, 2000 Earth Girls Are Easy, 1989 An Elephant’s Journey , 2018 The Escape Artist, 1982 Get Carter, 1971 Hecho En Mexico, 2012 Hellboy: Blood and Iron, 2007 Hellboy: Sword of Storms , 2006 Hellboy: The Dark Below, 2010 Jennifer Lopez: Dance Again, 2016 The Killing of a Chinese Bookie, 1976 The Kingdom of Dreams and Madness, 2013 La Mujer de Mi Hermano , 2005 Leapfrog Letter Factory Adventures: Amazing Word Explorers , 2015 Leapfrog Letter Factory Adventures: Counting on Lemonade , 2014 Leapfrog Letter Factory Adventures: The Letter Machine Rescue Team , 2014 Leapfrog: Numberland, 2012 Lost and Delirious, 2001 Love and Sex, 2000 Lovely & Amazing , 2002 The Man Who Would Be King, 1975 Meatballs, 1979 The Men Who Stare at Goats, 2009 A Mermaid’s Tale, 2017 Mistress, 1992 Mother’s Day, 2012 Mud, 2013 Never-Ending Man: Hayao Miyazaki, 2016 Night is Short, Walk on Girl, 2017 No Eres Tu Soy Yo, 2011 Norm of the North: King Sized Adventure, 2019 Ollie & Moon, Seasons 1 & 2 Other Parents, Seasons 1 & 2 Pinocchio, 2012 Promare, 2019 Reservoir Dogs, 1992 Ride Your Wave, 2019 Righteous Kill, 2008 Sprung, 1997 The Spy Next Door, 2010 Tender Mercies, 1983 Thanks for Sharing, 2013 Turtle Tale, 2018 The Visitor, 2008 Vixen, 2015

January 14: Search Party, Max Original Season 4 Premiere

In the new season, “Dory” (Alia Shawkat) is held prisoner by her psychotic stalker “Chip” (Cole Escola), who is determined to make Dory believe that they are best friends. Meanwhile, “Portia” (Meredith Hagner) is starring in a film about the trial, although not as herself; “Elliott” (John Early) has switched party lines to become a far-right conservative talk show host; and “Drew” (John Reynolds) is trying to escape his dark past by working as a costumed cast member in a theme park.

January 15: Stephen King’s It, 1990 One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest, 1975 Poltergeist, 1982 Re:ZERO -Starting Life in Another World- Director’s Cut, Season 1 dubbed (Crunchyroll Collection) Real Time With Bill Maher, Season 19 Premiere (HBO) Roots (Mini Series), 1977 Si Yo Fuera Rico (Aka If I Were Rich), 2021 (HBO) The Wayans Bros

January 16: Eve Kill Bill: Vol. 1, 2003 (HBO) Kill Bill: Vol. 2, 2004 (HBO)

January 19: Everwood

January 20: At Home with Amy Sedaris, Season 3 C.B. Strike, Season 1 (HBO) C.B. Strike: Lethal White, Limited Series Premiere (HBO)

January 21: Gomorrah, Max Original Season 3 Premiere

The iconic Italian crime series Gomorrah is based on Roberto Saviano’s bestselling book that examines the account of the decline of Naples under the rule of the Camorra.

 Looney Tunes Cartoons, Season 1C

In this latest batch, Taz stars in his first full-length Looney Tunes Cartoons short when he takes on Bugs Bunny in a Roman coliseum. If Bugs makes it out of the arena, there will be plenty of foes waiting to match wits with him including Elmer Fudd, a leprechaun and Cecil Turtle. Daffy and Porky continue their misadventures from skydiving to solving the mystery of Porky’s missing pants! Fan-favorites Sylvester and Tweety along with Wile E. Coyote and Road Runner also come along for the ride in these ten all-new animated episodes. It’s an all-new year with all-new Looney!

January 22: The New Adventures of Old Christine Painting With John, Series Premiere (HBO)

January 23: Don’t Let Go, 2019 (HBO) Person of Interest

January 24: Euphoria Special Episode Part 2: F*ck Anyone Who’s Not a Sea Blob, Special Episode Premiere (HBO)

January 26: Babylon 5 Real Sports With Bryant Gumbel (HBO)

January 29: ¡Animo Juventud! (Aka Go Youth!), 2021 (HBO) The Little Things

Academy Award winners Denzel Washington, Rami Malek and Jared Leto star in John Lee Hancock’s suspenseful psychological thriller “The Little Things” about two California sheriffs and their growing obsession with a suspect while embroiled in the search for a killer targeting women.

What I Like About You

January 30: The Mummy, 1999 (HBO) The Mummy Returns, 2001 (HBO) Pushing Daisies The Scorpion King, 2002 (HBO)

January 31: Axios, Season 4 Premiere (HBO)

LAST CHANCE TO CATCH: SELECT TITLES LEAVING HBO MAX IN JANUARY

January 7: War Dogs, 2016 (HBO)

January 24: Wonder Woman 1984, 2020

January 31: Ad Astra, 2019 After Hours, 1985 (HBO) Akeelah And The Bee, 2006 (HBO) All Is Bright, 2013 America, America, 1964 Anchors Aweigh, 1945 The Arrangement, 1969 Bee Season, 2005 (HBO) Before Sunrise, 1995 (HBO) Before Sunset, 2004 (HBO) Best Laid Plans, 1999 (HBO) Bigger Than The Sky, 2005 (HBO) Blade II, 2002 Blade, 1998 Blood Simple, 1984 (HBO) Bridge To Terabithia, 2007 (HBO) Bright Lights, Big City, 1988 (HBO) The Change-Up, 2011 (HBO) The Children, 2009 A Christmas Carol, 1938 Crash, 2005 (Director’s Cut) (HBO) David Copperfield, 1935 Days After Your Departure, 2019 (HBO) Enemy Of The State, 1998 (HBO) Everybody’s All-American, 1988 (HBO) Father’s Day, 1997 (HBO) Friday Night Lights, 2004 (HBO) Get On Up, 2014 (HBO) Guys And Dolls, 1955 High Society, 1956 Jeepers Creepers 2, 2003 (HBO) Jeepers Creepers, 2001 (HBO) Leprechaun 2, 1994 (HBO) Leprechaun, 1993 (HBO) Magnolia, 1999 (HBO) The Man With The Golden Arm, 1955 Mars Attacks!, 1996 Martha Marcy May Marlene, 2011 (HBO) Martin Lawrence You So Crazy, 1994 (HBO) New Year’s Eve, 2011 (HBO) Ocean’s Eleven, 2001 Ocean’s Thirteen, 2007 Ocean’s Twelve, 2004 On The Town, 1949 The Pelican Brief, 1993 Planet Of The Apes, 2001 (HBO) Risky Business, 1983 Semi-Pro, 2008 Some Came Running, 1958 Something Borrowed, 2011 (HBO) Splendor In The Grass, 1961 Walk The Line, 2005 (Extended Version) (HBO) When Harry Met Sally, 1989