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#also.... if it's going to turn into alexia x reader
alessiasfreckles · 2 months
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amnesia (ona batlle x reader)
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You wake up in the hospital with no memory of who you are or anything about your life, but a pretty brunette is by your bedside, so it can't be all bad, right?
warnings: memory loss, car accident mention, hospital
a/n: part 2 here!
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“She’s awake!”
Squinting against the harsh light, you slowly opened your eyes, taking in your surroundings. You were lying in bed in a room with white and grey walls and bright overhead lights. The bedsheet covering you was soft against your hands.
You blinked, looking around the room. Four people were stood around you, a woman in a white coat, a man in light blue scrubs, and two young women in everyday clothes. The two women looked on the verge of tears, but you weren’t sure why.
Opening your mouth to speak, you gagged as you realised your throat was obstructed by something. The realisation quickly turned to panic, feeling like you were being choked, unable to breathe. One of the younger women turned to the woman in white, who you were pretty sure was a doctor, and spoke rapidly in a language you couldn’t understand. 
The doctor and the man, who you decided was probably a nurse, quickly worked to remove the tube from your throat. Eyes watering, you coughed and rubbed your throat, glad to be free of it. When you opened your mouth to speak again, the doctor interrupted you gently.
“Careful,” she said. “Don’t strain yourself.”
“Wh- where am I?” you asked. Your voice was hoarse, and your tongue felt like sandpaper. “Is this a hospital?”
The two women exchanged anxious glances.
“Yes, this is the Hospital de Barcelona,” the doctor told you. Barcelona, huh. That explained her accent. “Do you remember why you’re here?”
You frowned, shaking your head. Now that she mentioned it, you had no idea what you were doing there.
“That’s okay. It’s perfectly normal not to remember much. You were in an accident. You were hit by a car. Miraculously, you only broke some bones in your right leg, but you hit your head pretty hard. You’ve been in a coma since the accident, 15 days ago.”
Your mind raced as you took in the information. Why couldn’t you remember any of it? Why couldn’t you remember anything? Not even-
“Now, can you tell me your name?” the doctor asked, interrupting your stream of thought.
Not even your name. 
“I- I don’t know, I don’t know my name, why don’t I remember my name?” you asked frantically. You tried to sit up but stopped as a wave of pain radiated throughout your body, crashing over you. One of the women reached out, putting a hand on your shoulder. 
The doctor stayed for a while, explaining to you again and again what had happened. You’d been hit by a car. You’d hit your head. You’d been in a coma for the past 15 days. You’d been hit by a car. You’d hit your head. You’d been in a coma for the past 15 days. Over and over again, until it sunk in. 
She spoke to the two women before she left, again in a language you didn’t understand, the two glancing over at you with worried faces, the doctor’s face reassuring and kind. Once she was gone, the two women came over to your bedside. Tears brimmed in their eyes, but they were both trying to smile at you.
“Hola, mija,” one of the women said. She had blonde hair with dark roots and kind eyes, but she looked tired. 
“Do- do you remember me? Us?” the other woman asked, gesturing to herself and the blonde. Her hair was darker, and freckles were scattered across her nose and cheeks. Your eyes raked over her sharp jawbones, her angular face. Surely you would know if you’d met someone like her before.
You shook your head slowly. 
The brunette swallowed back a sob, the blonde holding her arm tightly. 
“It’s okay, that’s okay,” the blonde said. “The doctor said there was a high chance of this happening. That she wouldn’t remember us. It’s okay.”
“Who are you?” you asked, voice quiet.
“I’m Ona. I’m, uh, we play together,” the brunette told you, and the blonde looked at her sharply for just a second before looking back at you.
“And I’m Alexia. Your teammate and friend.”
Playing together? Teammate?
“Football!” you blurted out suddenly. You’re not sure how you knew, but you had this deep, innate sense that football is important to you. More than important, it’s your whole life. “I play football, right?”
The blonde, Alexia, let out a laugh of relief. “Si! You play football! We all play together, here in Barcelona.”
She squeezed Ona’s arm, who smiled tearfully. 
“So, I’m guessing we’re all pretty close, right? Surely there’s a reason you’re here,” you said bluntly, wincing at the pain in your head.
“We’re your best friends,” Ona said quickly, before Alexia could open her mouth.
“That’s… right,” Alexia said slowly. “I’m the capitana of our team, and we’re best friends. And you and Ona are also… best friends.”
You nodded, feeling exhausted suddenly. “Thank you both for being here, then. I think I’m going to sleep now, if that’s okay?”
“Of course!” Ona said, jumping up. “We’ll be here when you wake up, okay?”
You were asleep before the two had even left the room. Once they were in the hallway, the door to your private hospital room shut, Alexia turned to face Ona.
“What was that?” Alexia asked her, voice hushed, as though you’d be able to hear them through the door.
“What do you mean?” Ona shifted uncomfortably, not meeting the blonde’s eyes.
“Why did you tell her you’re just friends? Why didn’t you tell her that you’re dating?!”
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wileys-russo · 1 month
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filling the void (5) II a.putellas x sister!reader
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prequel one two three four
warning for just like...a lot of angst? but also, some more steps forward and a little comfort filling the void (5) II a.putellas x sister!reader
"because the last time someone i loved when into hospital, he never came back."
after hearing that alexia's blood ran cold and she stepped away, wanting to give you a little privacy as her ears burned from already having heard too much.
she settled herself on the lounge trying to focus on finding something to watch, pretending like she wasn't fighting every temptation to grab you and pull you into a hug and never ever let go again.
a short while later you returned, alexia glancing at you and trying not to notice the obvious tear tracks on your face as you mumbled something about using the bathroom and darted away.
washing your face you spared no time going through your usual skin care routine, trying to shake the piercing anxiety in the back your head about your mami and her condition.
you padded into your room and with the weather taking an oddly cool turn tonight you rummaged around your wardrobe looking for your favourite hoodie.
you let out a squeal as you tugged at something and suddenly a bag tumbled down onto your head. swearing under your breath you bent down to repack its contents, making a mental note that you needed to donate the old clothes inside you'd had sitting there for far too long.
but it was something entirely unexpected that had your breath catching, having forgotten about it all together since you'd stuffed it into the bag intending to donate it alongside your clothing you'd grown out of.
you sat cross legged on the floor holding it in your hands, staring at it as memories flooded your mind and you were so caught up in them you didn't even hear alexia call out to check you were okay after hearing the thump of the bag falling.
when you didn't respond she came to check on you, her head peering around your doorway and curious hazel eyes softening as they found you. calling out again you didn't hear her, only becoming somewhat aware of your sisters presence as she carefully took a seat beside you, not too close but still enough that you knew she was there.
seeing the turmoil of emotions flashing through your eyes as you stared at it in your hands once again alexia wanted nothing more than to wrap you in a bone crushing hug and never let you go again, determined to protect you from the world and all the pain that came with it.
but the warnings of both her mami and her girlfriend echoed in her mind and she ignored the itching in her hands to reach for you, knowing that especially now more than ever she needed to let you come to her.
her own eyes falling on the object clutched tightly in your hands brought forth an entire sea of unique memories and emotions for your sister, at first taking her back to a time in which you needed her and she needed you just as much if not more.
and when you'd all lost him was a feeling that no amount of time passed would ever make alexia forget.
she'd been stood at his bed with alba by her side, holding his hand and telling him about the match she'd played that afternoon and the goal she'd scored and dedicated to him.
he'd smiled tiredly but barely had the energy to hold his eyes open let alone speak, and neither alexia or alba could stand the silence so they made sure never to allow it to grow, filling every quiet pocket with a new story or comment.
eli was sat in the chair on his other side, hand settled on his head and a watchful eye on a much younger you who was sat on the floor playing with a handful of matchbox cars, the small pieces of metal some of the only reminders you'd have of your papi as you grew older.
he had a friend at work whose wife worked in the factory where they were made, and every now and then he'd come home and gift you with a new one.
growing up a family of three kids meant you weren't always rewarded with the luxury of new toys or new books or new games, all three of you lived in hand me downs or homemade clothes for most of your childhood, not that you minded.
"fresa." eli warned softly as you made a rather loud noise mimicking an engine, smashing one of the cars into the leg of the chair you were sat by and nearly toppling it over, catching her eye and falling quiet.
you were again far too young to understand the truth of what was happening, and as you grew older your family all fell into a silent agreement that perhaps they'd kept you a little too sheltered around what was really going on.
which was why when a large group of family members arrived, visitors having been in and out all day saying their prayers or goodbyes, you looked up in confusion. you frowned as one of your tio's pinched your cheek hello and his wife gave you a weird watery smile.
your confusion grew as the crowd of people around your papi all fussed over him, some of them with tears in their eyes as one of your tia's began to pray, tightly holding your mami's hand.
"hey fresita, lets go for a walk?" you met your eldest sisters eye as she now crouched down beside you, a tired smile on her face as she sensed you were beginning to become overwhelmed at not understanding what was going on.
as you nodded your sister lifted you up and onto her hip, aware you were starting to become a little bigger and heavier but still she would hold and carry you for as long as you let her.
"my cars." you struggled for a moment in her grip as she let you down, kneeling and opening the backpack she'd packed for you when eli couldn't, zipping it up once your cars were safely inside and helping you shrug it on before picking you up again
"alba, venga hermana." alexia softly tapped her younger sisters shoulder who had moved aside to allow older family members to be by the bedside, hugging herself and stood in the corner.
eli caught her eldest daughter eye as she finished her prayer, sending her an appreciative smile before her attention was captured again and alexia left the room, you on her hip and alba tucked into her side.
not a word was said between the three of you as alexia tried to ignore the sad looks tossed your way by the nurses at the ward desk as you passed, knowing all too well which room you'd come from and the inevitable outcome which could happen any day now.
"can we get food?" you finally broke the silence, a small chuckle leaving both your sisters mouths as you all stepped into the elevator. "sí pequeña, we can get food." alexia bounced you as you smiled and nodded.
"mami usually brings snacks when we go out." the seemingly innocent and harmless comment had the air sucked right out of the confined space of the elevator, both of your sisters faces hardening.
"mami is just looking after papi right now fresa. but you will always have me and alba to look after you, vale?" alexia promised firmly, kissing your cheek as you nodded, her smile growing just slightly as you kissed her cheek in return.
"thats why you're my best friend ale." you yawned a little tiredly, head resting on her shoulder as the elevator opened now reaching the ground floor. "hey what about me?" alba protested, moving to your other side and poking at you making you grin and push her hand away.
"alexia is my best friend, you're alexias best friend, and im your best friend." you explained as alba ohh'd with an over enthusiastic nod. "what if you're not my best friend?" she teased with a smile as you frowned unhappily.
"only joking fresita, you might be annoying but you will always be my best friend." alba smiled as you huffed. "you're annoying, and old and grumpy." you stuck your tongue out which she returned.
"yeah? well when you're older and grumpier i promise to be just as annoying as you are and we'll see how you like it!" you squirmed as her fingers tickled your sides and you kicked your legs at her, alexia smiling at the interaction and kissing your head.
placing you down she gave alba some money and sent her off to the canteen to get some food for the three of you, noticing that the moment she put you down you hugged her leg, eyes roaming the hospital nervously.
she couldn't blame you, alexia hated it here and she knew what it meant. for you this was probably much more overwhelming, not understanding anything but easily able to pick up on the chaos of it all.
there were women crying, children yelling, nurses and doctors talking in serious tones with serious faces, machines beeping, weird smells, beds with wheels being pushed around and very tired looking people sleeping on them.
just last week you'd accidentally seen a man be wheeled past whose leg was split wide open down to the bone, eli barely able to cover your eyes in time as he was rushed past and you were quickly handed over to alba who raced you outside for some fresh air as your eyes filled with tears.
so as you clung to her leg and stared around clearly on the brink of distress your sister tugged gently on your collar gaining your attention as you looked up at her and she nodded her head forward, taking your hand and walking.
alexia walked the two of you in the direction of the gift store, scooping you back up onto her hip as she entered and sent the woman at the counter a small smile.
"we gettin something for papi?" you questioned with a small frown as alexia shook her head. "no, for you." she poked at your nose, soft smile growing as your face lit up. "really?" you asked happily as alexia nodded and walked the pair of you around for awhile.
"what about this?" alexia grabbed a small red bear she spied hidden beneath a pile of stuffed animals, balancing you on her hip with one hand as she held it up with the other.
"its red like a strawberry!" you chirped happily in approval making your sister laugh. "you and your strawberries. no wonder we call you fresa, you will one day turn into a strawberry." you giggled as she poked at your stomach but handed you the bear.
"will not!" "will too!" "will not!" "will too."
"what are you gonna name it nena?" alexia questioned once she'd paid for the small bear and placed you back down on your feet, one of your hands securely held in hers as the other hugged your new friend and the two of you headed toward the canteen to find alba.
"red." you stated as alexia gave you a funny look. "you are calling it red?" your sister questioned as you again nodded, giving it a kiss and tucking it under your arm.
"thats a colour though hermanita, don't you want to give it a real name?" alexia asked as you shook your head. "red is a real name! its her name." you were undeterred, spotting alba and trying to run toward her but your sisters grip on your hand prevented so.
"no running please fresa, not here." alexia warned gently as you nodded and hugged red, mumbling an apology as your sister brushed a few stray flyaway hairs out of your face.
"look!" you presented your new friend to your other sister who scooted her chair back, allowing you to climb up and into her lap as alexia sat across from her, a tray of food sat on the table in between them.
"her name is red, ale got her for me." you proudly announced as alba snickered. "red? thats just st-" the girl started, hissing as alexia kicked her under the table and shot her a warning look. "thats very cute fresita." alba looked down at your tiny hopeful face and pinched your cheek, kissing your forehead and encouraging you to eat.
once the three of you finished your food you made your way back toward the room, your new little friend working wonders to brighten your mood as you chattered your sisters ears off, your hand again held tightly in alexias much larger one to stop you running off.
though as you all arrived and alexia heard the sound of eli's sobs, clearly taking a private moment with her husband now she was alone with him, alexia stopped in her tracks as her stomach lurched hearing the foreign noise.
of course everyone had cried the moment he fell sick, even more when despite the best efforts it was deemed terminal and there was no longer anything that could be done, it was just a matter of waiting as the days passed and his condition deteriorated.
knowing that not with bad intentions your chatter and questions would likely make things worse alexia didn't continue forward, exchanging a look with alba as they held a quick silent conversation and nodded in agreement.
"hey i wanna see mami and papi." you frowned as alexia turned and headed back for the elevator, near dragging you with her now as you fought to tug your hand free.
"i wanna show them red! ale stop, let go!" your sister winced at the sob you let out when she didn't do as you asked. instead she pulled you with her and alba back to the elevator, your cries echoing throughout the ward as alba nudged her and as soon as alexia let go you tried to run but alba was faster.
"no! put me down! no no!" you struggled in her grip, your arms pinned to your side as you tried hitting out at her, not understanding why they wouldn't let you go back to the room as instead you were back in the elevator again.
"hey hey fresa, look at me nena por favor." your body heaved as you sniffled and choked back a sob, alexia cradling your face in her heads which had gone bright red. "breathe hermana, in and out." she cooed softly as you hiccuped and shook your head.
"i wanna see mami!" you choked out, alba rubbing gently at your back. "mami needs some adult time with papi, you can see her later promesa." alexia promised, swiping at the tears which leaked from the corners of your eyes.
"now." you huffed stubbornly as alexia shook her head. "no fresa, later. there is a garden here, do you want to go see it?" you hesitated at that, albas hand still rubbing at your back as you slowly nodded.
"okay. now can you breathe please hermanita? in and out." again your sister demonstrated as you copied, yours a little shakier as by the time you all exited the elevator you'd calmed yourself down a little with her help.
the three of you walked in silence out to the small courtyard garden in the middle of the hospital, alba putting you down as her and alexia sat down at a bench and you wandered off with red still in their sights.
a sniffle broke the silence which still grew between them, alexia glancing to her side to see her younger sister wiping at her eyes with the edge of her sleeve, head turned away from her.
"ven aquí hermana." alexia spoke softly, lifting her arm and pulling the younger girl into a tight hug, her head resting on alexia's shoulder as the sniffles continued, the eldest putellas fighting back tears of her own knowing now she needed to be strong.
alba hurried to try and hide her tears as you returned but you'd already seen them, frowning up at her as she tried to smile. "you sad?" you asked your sister as alexia lifted you up to stand on the bench in between them.
"a little, estoy bien." alba assured with another sniffle, taken a little off guard as you launched at her, wrapping your arms tightly around her neck. "its okay to be sad al." you patted her back making both girls smile.
you had always been an affection person especially when you were younger, your entire family quite affectionate it was no surprise but it was during this time that your hugs meant that little bit more even if you were too young to realise why.
"gracias fresita, te quiero." alba whispered, more tears welling up at the gesture as you hugged her tightly, red clutched in one hand. alexia watched on with a fond smile, still swallowing her own emotions and pushing them down for the sake of her sisters.
she was the eldest, it was her job to look after the two of you and make sure you were okay first, her needs came second and she was fine with that if it meant you and alba were as okay as you could be and knew that she would be there for both of you anytime and anyway needed.
but that didn't mean that you both didn't pick up on her needs every now and then too. which is exactly why when you deemed alba was okay your small form latched onto alexia next, arms slung around her neck as she squeezed you.
"estoy bien pequeña." alexia assured as you let go, your sister moving you to stand on her knees as your hands grabbed at her shoulders to steady yourself. "everyone needs a hug sometimes and you said mine are the best." you reminded making both girls chuckle.
"i did say that didn't i? and they are the very best fresa, the very very best."
your papi passed away in his sleep that night, and it was more than assured to say that your hugs were in high high demand.
"red." you finally spoke, still looking down at the bear in your hands as alexia hummed, meeting your eyes and sending you a small smile before your gaze dropped again.
a soft smile curled into your own features as your finger traced over the faded red bear, tugging gently at the small sweater which it wore that of course had a strawberry right in the centre. "i remember when abuela knitted that." alexia spoke up again nodding to the item of clothing.
"mami had to hand wash it because i kept trying to feed red strawberries and got it all dirty." you puffed air from your nose, the closest thing to a laugh you could manage now still swamped beneath the symphony of memories, thoughts and feelings washing down over you.
"abuela gave it to me at papi's funeral." you remembered, thumb rubbing small circles against a particularly faded patch of fur, just as you used to do whenever you were nervous about something and much much younger, always having red with you through it all.
another bout of silence fell between you two until eventually alexia decided to test the waters.
"can i ask you something hermana?" your sister asked gently as you nodded, still focused down on the bear in your hands not having paid it a single thought for a long time now, the moment you started to feel your sisters pulling away had red shoved out of sight as well, a little too painful in a different way all together than you had felt before.
"is it because of him that you don't want to go and see mami in hospital?" alexia didn't even need to specify who as your stomach clenched uncomfortably and the anxiety returned, your chest tightening a little.
you took a moment and for a second alexia feared she'd crossed a line, readying an apology but you nodded before she could say another word, a cocktail of both sadness and relief flooding her body.
"but i don-" you looked up and started as your sister shook her head, tentatively reaching a hand out to rest it on your shoulder, again relieved when you made no move to push it off.
"we do not need to talk about it now if you don't want to. but i meant what i said, you will always have me to look after you hermana. i have not been very good at showing that lately and i do not know how else to say sorry with words-" her hand moved slowly to rest on your cheek and again you made no move to push her away.
"-but i have to let my actions show it now. and i love you fresa, very much. mami will be okay, but i promise you that you would never ever be alone." you could only give a stiff nod at her words, your sister sensing you were slightly overwhelmed and removing her hand, slowly getting up to her feet.
"buenas noches hermana, i am just down the hall if you need anything." alexia promised softly as again you nodded, sending her a tiny smile but even that was reward enough for alexia as she left you and headed for her childhood room.
as everything crashed down on you your body plunged into exhaustion, forcing yourself up and kicking aside the bag of clothes, tiredly rubbing your eyes and closing your bedroom door with a soft click.
nobody would know but you, but as you slipped into bed and flicked off your lamp, red was clutched tightly in your hands as your eyes slammed shut and you fell into a dreamless sleep.
alexia on the other hand was wide awake, wandering around her childhood room which felt like a time capsule, hardly changed since the day she moved out.
rummaging through her wardrobe she froze seeing a faded nike box pushed up against the back, hidden behind a stack of old textbooks which she quickly moved out of the way, coughing slightly as she blew off the thin layer of dust which coated the top.
taking a seat on her bed she placed the box down in front of her, gingerly opening the top and her body going limp as it was confirmed the contents were indeed what she thought they might be.
before she had time to rifle through and look at anything her phone rang and she jumped in surprise, her girlfriends contact name and number flashing across the screen as alexia clicked answer.
"hola mi amor." the older girl greeted which was returned, the two catching up about their days as olga pretended not to notice that part of alexia asking so many questions about her girlfriends day was to avoid speaking much about hers.
though with some gentle prompting she opened up a little, olga listening attentively as she did. "red is an adorable name." olga chuckled in an attempt to ease the obvious emotional discourse the blonde was feeling after she'd explained the backstory to the small bear.
"its a colour, not a name mi vida." "you could argue that fresa is a fruit, not a name amor." olga countered, stunning alexia into silence for a moment. "see? you cannot disagree." her girlfriend laughed as alexia sighed but agreed none the less.
"then i found a box in my wardrobe, i forgot it was there but i tore my room apart when i moved trying to find it to take with me and i thought someone had thrown it away." alexia admitted as olga hummed.
"its my fresa box." the blonde murmured quietly, switching her girlfriend to facetime and propping her phone up on the nightstand and moving around a little.
"your fresa box?" olga encouraged her to elaborate but gently, not wanting to push her as she could clearly see the pain masked in her lovers eyes, her poker face unreadable to most but olga could always see right through it.
"sí. it has notes, drawings, holiday cards, pictures, all things she gave and made me when she was little." a fond smile curled into alexia's features as she carefully rifled through the box, holding things up to show her girlfriend whose own face was filled with joy at the sight.
"fresa wrote all of that?" olga asked with raised eyebrows and a grin as alexia finished reading out an essay you'd had to write in school about your hero, and you'd chosen alexia.
"oh mi amor." olgas tone softened seeing the singular tear escaped the corner of her lovers eye, quickly wiped away as alexia cleared her throat. "hey, ale. don't do that, you don't need to run away from your feelings with me." olga promised as alexia attempted to change subject.
"i just-" alexia tried to speak but could only shake her head, no words coming out despite just how much she had to say. "you miss her cariño, sí?" olga echoed softly as alexia nodded.
"and this is probably how she has felt if not worse when she thought alba and i did not care about her anymore. i made her feel like this! my fresa." alexia managed out, eyes squeezed shut as she inhaled shakily, her girlfriend encouraging her to breathe slowly while still assuring it was okay for her to feel this way, it was okay for her to cry.
"she loves you alexia, she always will. you know how you made her feel which is why you will not let it happen again, and you have the rest of your life to prove that to her amor." olga promised sincerely as alexia nodded, wiping quickly at the corner of her eye with the collar of her shirt.
"i remember this." alexia was even faster to change topics, grabbing out a drawing as her girlfriend watched three or four different emotions flicker through her hazel eyes before she turned the page.
"your tattoo." olga smiled in recognition as alexia nodded, the drawing in question one you'd done for her not long after juame had passed and you'd returned to school, still not quite understanding that he wouldn't be coming home again.
alexia's head was covered with a hood, ignoring the pitying looks of the parents around her who had obviously heard what happened, hoping the scowl on her face would ward off any attempts at talking to her.
though it melted the moment she locked eyes with you, unable to resist smiling at the way your eyes lit up and you sprinted toward her, seemingly never any less excited to see her despite the fact she picked you up from school practically every day.
"catch me!" alexia bent down and scooped you up as you dropped your backpack and leapt at her, but she didn't spin you around like normal and gently pushed away your hand when you tried to pull her hood down to see her properly.
"you're not going to football?" you asked a little confused as why your sister wasn't dressed for training like normal and she shook her head wordlessly, grabbing your backpack in her free hand and quickly leaving before anyone had the chance to try and talk to her.
though apparently she wasn't fast enough as someone called out her name and she sighed recognizing your teacher waving her down as she lingered at the school gates and contemplated for a moment just making a run for it.
"stay here please fresa." you were placed back down on your feet and the oddly serious tone of your sisters voice had you rooted in place as alexia stepped away for a moment to speak with your teacher.
"lo siento for the bother alexia, i was going to call your mami but i am sure there is a lot going on at home." the woman started gently as alexia gave a tight lipped smile and crossed her arms across her chest, keeping one eye on you over the womans shoulder as one of your classmates had wandered over to chat with you.
"look i just-your hermana drew something in class today, a picture of your family." the woman started as alexia's eyebrows furrowed slightly. "she draws every day." her reply was sharp, clearly thinking this was a waste of time.
"no no lo siento, a picture of all your family. i complimented her on it and she said it was all of you in heaven visiting your papi, and that she really hoped you would all be able to go there to see him there soon." the womans words were much softer now and concern was clear in her eyes for what the younger girls reaction would be who stayed silent.
"i didn't want to overstep by correcting her. but alexia, if you or your familia need anything, please know i am here." the woman promised as alexia swallowed a lump in her throat and nodded, mumbling out a quiet gracias and turning quickly to head back toward you.
"venga fresa." your sister held her hand out which you grabbed, waving goodbye to your friends as the two of you left the school, alexia stuck in her thoughts and only half listening as you started to chatter on about your day as you always would.
"ale." she came to at a tug on her sleeve, looking down at you. "lo siento nena, what did you need?" she stopped walking and bent down to your height with a tired smile which didn't reach her eyes as you pointed to your backpack.
presenting it to you you unzipped it, shoving your arm in and feeling around with a frown before pulling out an apple as alexia made a face. "fresa i packed this for you on monday!" she cringed plucking it from your hand and glancing around before tossing it into a bush.
"i drew this for you." you finally found what you were looking for, offering her a piece of paper. swallowing hard alexia's eyes roamed the artwork and a lump formed in her throat as your teachers words came to fruition.
"its you and me and alba and mami and papi in heaven! you were sad this morning so i drew it for you. maybe we can go see papi in heaven today? i did a drawing for him too." your little face was filled with such innocence and hope it crushed alexia's heart like someone ran over her with a truck as she wanted to throw up.
"no lo siento fresa, we can't go see papi in heaven. but lets go for a walk in the park pequeña, i think we need to have a big girl talk."
"you had to explain heaven to her?" olga asked in disbelief as alexia sighed with a small shrug.
"someone had to. we all agreed as she got older we should have done more when he was sick to explain what was happening but...she was just so little, so happy, so innocent." alexia breathed out with a pained wince.
"she went out of her way even if she didn't understand why everyone was sad to try and cheer us up, i needed her and alba just as much as they needed me. mami was...she was grieving amor. she did her best but there was slack and i picked it up, i had to be there for them." alexia forced out a small smile as olga's face softened.
"but mi corazón, who was there for you?" the girl asked softly as alexia sighed again, fingers instinctively tucking under her shirt to trace the tattoo on her ribs.
the five of you in stick figure form holding hands, your drawing for your sister which was now and would always be with alexia inked to her skin, forever.
~
your day hadn't started as you'd hoped.
when you woke up your sleep last night had been anything but restful, waking up multiple times throughout the night as your chest tightened with anxiety the back of your eyes ached with exhaustion.
you'd quickly called in sick to work, a small smile on your face as your boss had joked he was almost going to cancel your shift if you didn't slow down to look after yourself before promising you'd be able to take all the time you needed.
word spread quickly through the clinic as texts of support poured in from your friends and coworkers, all encouraging you reach out should you need anything which you were very grateful for.
when your door was still closed two hours after you were supposed to have left for work alexias own body relaxed a little, relieved you were finally taking a day for yourself and stepping outside onto the balcony to have a coffee and make a few phone calls.
your sister was surprised that when she returned you were awake, your back to her as you made a coffee of your own. though soon as it was done with a tired smile you headed back to your own room again.
alexia gave you your own space until lunch time, knocking at your door as you responded and she pushed it open.
"do you want to go get sushi for lunch?" your sister questioned, knowing you hadn't eaten all day she already had back ups in mind if you declined but to her shock you gave her a nod, asking for some time to shower and change.
you didn't say a word the entire car ride clearly lost in your own head, barely batting an eyelash as alexia pulled up in front of alba's house and your sister joined you in the car, sharing a look with alexia who subtly shook her head, the radio filling the silence of the journey.
but as you turned down a familiar road you seemed to come more to attention, pulling your head off the window and frowning, a small scoff leaving your mouth as alexia pulled into the hospital parking complex.
"funny looking sushi restaurant." you muttered sinking into your seat once alexia found a park. "i can't believe you lied to me." you shook your head angrily at the deception.
"i didn't. we will get sushi hermana, just after you see mami." alexia decreed as you shook your head again and crossed your arms. "im not getting out of the car." you refused stubbornly as alexia sighed.
"you will." "i won't." "you will." "i won't." "you will." "i won't."
"this is ridiculous. fresa, get out of the car!" alba intervened as you glanced to the back seat and shot her a filthy look which didn't deter her.
"alba." alexia gave her a look of her own as she backed down and got out of the car herself, closing the door and leaving you with your eldest sister.
"she's awake."
your head snapped sideways to look at her with a frown. "you're lying." you decided as alexia shook her head. "no, the hospital called me this morning. but i wanted to give you a little time to yourself first before we came, but she is awake and stable fresa, i promise." alexia assured softly as you wrenched your eyes away.
"she's not going anywhere hermanita, but we shouldn't keep her waiting, she's still very tired." alexia added on, reaching over to gently squeeze your knee before she opened her door.
you watched for a few minutes as your sisters spoke with one another, clearly about you as they glanced back to the car every few seconds with a shake or a nod, likely planning to drag you from the car themselves if you refused much longer.
so with an exhausted exhale you unbuckled yourself, hauling ass out of the car and closing the door, wordlessly following after your sisters toward the hospital.
the closer you got the more your stomach twisted and clearly your apprehension was written across your face as your sisters slowed just slightly to fall into step with you, now both stood protectively either side of your shorter form.
"can i go by myself?" you asked quietly as you all signed in and arrived to the coronary ward, glancing past them both to eli's room as they shared a look. "sure hermana, we'll be right out here if you need anything." alba promised as you nodded and they stepped aside, your legs feeling like jelly the closer you got to her room as they hung back watching you go.
it was as if you were a balloon and someone stuck a pin in you the moment you entered her room and caught her eye, deflating entirely and crumpling as you dragged yourself to her bed side.
"mami." you managed to whisper out, dropping into the chair by her side as she smiled tiredly and reached for you, your face buried into her shoulder as her hands cradled your head.
"mi hija pequeña." she spoke, her voice flooding your body with relief as tears welled up and you hugged her tightly, though still very carefully as you were more than away of the amount of wires which protruded from her skin.
"you're okay." you whispered again as you pulled back and wiped your eyes, eli smiling with a nod. "i am okay. not going anywhere hija, takes more than that to kill me." you knew it was a joke but you frowned, the older woman apologizing and pushing a loose strand of hair out of your eyes.
"i was so scared mami. you just...you collapsed, you weren't breathing, i didn't know what to do or how to help." your voice broke as you forced back the tears which were clawing their way up.
"but you did help fresita, you did everything right. but i am so sorry for scaring you mi hija, lo siento mucho." eli apologised, voice full of remorse as you shook your head dismissing it.
"no. i am just glad you're okay mami." you promised, taking her outstretched hand, your intertwined fingers resting on her mattress. at her request you filled her in on everything that had been going on the last few days, not leaving out many details as you never did, always the most honest with the woman you trusted more than anyone.
"oh nena i am not going anywhere, i promise." the womans own eyes near filled with tears as you managed to force out the story of finding red and all the turmoil of memories which had surfaced being back at the hospital all those years ago.
"mi fresa. i need to tell you some things, about some of my regrets in life." eli spoke softly, giving your hand a squeeze as you frowned in confusion but nodded for her to continue.
"even before your papi was sick i worked a lot, so did he. we needed the money so i took up night work, so did he. it meant i relied on your hermana's to look after each other but mostly after you, you were still so young and...well to look after someone that age can be a lot." eli started gently as you nodded for her to go on.
"then when your papi was sick i relied on them more, alexia especially. your hermana did for you things i should have done for you as your mami, she shouldered the responsibilities of a parent when she was barely a teenager and that was not fair on her fresa, i was not fair to put her in that position." eli paused to cough as you hurried to help her sit up a little more and grab her a glass of water which she sipped at and placed back down.
"when your papi passed i was grieving heavily, we all were. but again, alexia had responsibilities on her shoulders that were far too heavy, far too much for a teenager and a daughter herself. she took on not only her grief but also mine, and alba's, and yours, she stepped in when i pulled back. your hermana pushed her grief down and bottled up her feelings to care for everyone elses, she has always done so." eli explained again squeezing your hand.
"in a way i stole part of alexia's youth with how much responsibility was put on her, i never ever meant to, and i do not blame anyone but myself for not noticing sooner. it is something i have to learn to live with, and that your sister will never understand, to her its just...how it was, how she needed to be." eli continued as you stayed silent letting her speak.
"but fresa, alexia loves you more than anyone in the entire world, she has from the very second you were born. you were a gift to this family and alexia has always maybe looked at you as a little more than her hermana. i am not excusing how your sisters made you feel mi fresita, but if you hear them out you might find they did not mean to make you feel that way." eli seemed to finish with that as you could only nod, choking back tears and afraid if you attempted to speak that dam would break all together.
"so promise me you will hear them out." you again nodded at that, eli raising your adjoined hands to her mouth and softly kissing your hand before you leaned in to hug her again, head resting against her chest and closing your eyes, memorizing the sound of her heartbeat as her hand ran through your hair.
"te quiero hija mia."
~
promising to be back tomorrow and to send your sisters in next you'd quickly darted off to the bathroom to rinse your face and take a moment to yourself, overwhelmed with emotion as you bit down on your shirt to stop your sobs being audible.
after a few minutes you'd calmed enough to regulate your breathing, rinsing your face again and exhaling, wincing at your reflection but leaving the ward bathroom.
you found alba sat where you'd left her, alexia nowhere to be seen.
"i think she went to call olga." alba shrugged as you questioned her whereabouts, checking you were okay as you nodded and she hurried off to see eli, all of you having been warned by the doctor that having just woken up she would obviously be exhausted and likely need to rest soon.
you waited around for awhile but when alexia didn't return you decided to look for her, eventually seeing the back of her tall figure at the end of the hallway where there was a small kitchenette with tea and coffee for visistors, nobody else around.
though as you grew closer you soon realised why your sister had made sure that was the case, hearing the tears in her voice as she held the phone to her ear.
"-and sí i know mami is okay now but its just bringing back all of the memories from before and i was so worried that she would not wake up and-" feeling eyes on her back you shrunk as alexia's head whipped around and spotted you.
quickly murmuring something and hanging up the phone she furiously wiped at her eyes and cleared her throat, trying to cover up the fact she'd been crying as she sent you a forced smile.
"how was-" alexia didn't get another word out before you'd closed the gap between the two of you and your body barreled into hers, your arms wrapping around her in a tight hug as your sister almost fell over not having expected this in a million years.
it took a moment for her to register what was happening before her arms wrapped around you in turn, your face pressed into her shoulder as the two of you just held one another in silence, both needing it just as much as the other did.
"i love you alexia."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
i am far too exhausted to proof read this so please be kind toward any typos or grammar errors my friends
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alexias-putellas · 2 months
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between us // a.putellas x reader x j.hermoso
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a.putellas x reader x j.hermoso
-
you’d had a crush on alexia from the moment you’d laid eyes on her the day you signed your barcelona contract. she was pretty and kind. and unfortunately, taken.
the barcelona girls took you in as one of their own almost immediately and within a week, you felt like you’d known them forever. of course, your feelings for alexia grew and grew but your friendship with jenni had also blossomed so you decided that it was better to have alexia in your life as a friend then not at all. same with jenni. the last thing you wanted was for either of them to hate you.
since lucy and keira had pre-warned you about how affectionate the spanish could be, you never questioned how close you became with the couple as the months flew by. your teammates never said anything either so you assumed it was normal.
you never thought twice about being invited to dinners, or about the way jenni would pull you into her side during movie nights with the team. and you only lived a few doors down from alexia so her constant presence in your apartment was normal for you.
and that night was no different. music played softly in your bedroom as you held two pairs of earrings up, nudging alexia to get her attention. she quickly pointed to your go to statement earrings and you beamed, swiping your favourite necklace before heading into the en-suite. you figured it was easier to use the bathroom mirror instead of kicking alexia out of the way to use your vanity mirror.
you held your necklace out to jenni once she’d looked up from her phone, pushing herself off the sink and gently taking it from your hand. you turned around, feeling a shiver run down your spine as her fingers ran along the back of your neck, brushing your hair to the side.
jenni fastened the necklace and you thanked her softly, ignoring the way her hands slid down your arms. your eyes flickered towards your room as you put your earrings in, noticing alexia moving around.
she sat down on your bed and you swallowed thickly, eyes trained on her legs that looked even longer in the dress she was wearing.
“isn’t she pretty?” jenni’s question was a whisper in your ear and you felt yourself nodding.
“yes. ale is very pretty.” you hummed in agreement but then froze, realising what you’d said and who you’d said it to.
hearing jenni’s soft laughter didn’t make you feel any better, neither did the kiss she pressed to your burning cheek. “you should tell her.”
“what?” you laughed nervously, stepping forward and out of her grip. “why would i do that?”
she reached out for you again, grabbing your waist and pulling you back. a small huff left your lips as you hit her chest, the blush on your cheeks deepening. “i think ale should know what you think of her.”
“i–i think you are very pretty too, jenni,” you breathed, thinking jenni’s actions were due to a sense of jealousy. “not just ale. you’re both very pretty.”
your flustered state only worsened when she turned you around, hands tight on your waist. when her eyes flickered to your lips, you knew you were a goner. “puedo besarte?”
“yes. god, yes.”
jenni’s lips were on yours in an instant and you threw your arms around her neck, pulling her closer.
guilt hit you like a ton of bricks when you separated. you rubbed at your swollen lips, backing away from the spaniard silently.
you avoided alexia’s gaze as you made your way over to your wardrobe, swinging it open to reach for your favourite pair of heels. your stomach twisted. were you really going to act normal and have dinner with alexia after kissing jenni mere feet away from her?
after slipping on the shoes, you turned around, ready to beg for alexia’s forgiveness. but she was already stood there. you studied her face. she wasn’t angry. maybe she didn’t know.
“can i kiss you now?” she asked quietly and your legs felt like jelly as she reached out to rub her thumb along your bottom lip. “or does jenni get you all to herself?”
if it was any other day, you would’ve asked questions first. but jenni’s kiss still had you reeling and you didn’t know if you’d ever get the chance to kiss alexia again.
so you leaned in without a second thought.
the guilt you were feeling faded but was soon replaced with confusion. with hesitation, you gently pushed alexia back. her eyebrows furrowed and you placed your hand on her chest to keep her there. doing the same with jenni when she approached.
“what is happening? what is this? a one time thing?” you asked, looking between them quickly.
you regretted asking that last question almost immediately. you were not ready to hear the answer. your heart wouldn’t be able to take a one time thing but you didn’t know if you’d have the strength to reject them if they’d said yes.
“what do you want it to be?” alexia asked, voice soft and soothing. you swallowed thickly, the anxiety swirling in your stomach.
you had no idea what to say. you wanted them, in every way possible. but if they rejected you, where would that leave you? or the team? you didn’t want to be the reason the whole thing fell apart.
“cariño?” alexia’s voice pulled you out from your head and you inhaled sharply.
“what–what if i want something more then a one time thing? something serious?” your voice trembled slightly as did your hands.
jenni reached out and gently brushed her fingers along your cheek. “we want that too.”
“really?”
“you sound surprised,” alexia smiled and you realised that the mood had shifted. “we have been flirting with you for months, did you not notice?”
jenni grinned as your blush deepened. you rolled your eyes and swatted her hand away after she pinched at your cheek.
“you two are mean,” you murmured, shouldering passed them both. alexia wrapped her arms around you and pulled you back, nuzzling your neck as you giggled quietly. “are we still going for food?”
“i am not sure, hermosa,” alexia said, resting her chin on your shoulder. “if jenni and i are so mean, why should we take you?”
you looked over at jenni but she just shrugged. you huffed and crossed your arms over your chest. “is this how it’s going to be? you two ganging up on me all the time?”
jenni moved to stand in front of you, gently cradling your face and rubbing her thumbs along your jaw. you noticed her glance at alexia.
“vamos, ale. i think we need to show our girl just how nice we can be.”
ᡣ𐭩
a year into the relationship, jenni and alexia were very much used to hearing you rage at your international teammates over the phone. normally, you showed your girlfriends decency and tried to keep the noise down but when your competitiveness flared, it wasn’t always doable.
“georgia, stop cheating!” you shouted, glaring at the tv screen in front of you.
“it’s mario kart mate! how can i cheat?”
“i don’t know but you are! oh my–tooney! fuck off!” you clenched your jaw as the cheers sounded over the phone, both georgia and ella managing to beat you, the self-proclaimed mario kart champion of the lioness camp. “you know what? i hate you all.”
“what did i do?” leah asked and you could hear the frown in her voice.
“guilty by association.” you told her.
“doesn’t seem fair.”
“not my problem. i demand a rematch!”
“no.” georgia and ella said simultaneously.
“uh, yes.”
“oh, please don’t start this back and forth again.” you heard niamh plead.
“not our fault she’s a sore loser.” georgia muttered and you gasped.
“i am not!” you protested, getting radio silence in response. with a scoff, you shut down the tv and the xbox before snatching your phone. “i am ignoring this phone the next time sarina calls, do you people hear me?”
“loud and clear!” ella chirped. “don’t answer it!”
in that moment you decided that, for once, you’d be the bigger person. so you ignored the jeers of your friends and hung up, muttering angrily under your breath as you made your through your apartment.
you headed into the bedroom to see alexia leaning against the headboard, looking over at you with an amused smile. “they beat you?”
“they did not beat me, they cheated.” you huffed.
“maybe you are not as good as you think you are.” jenni’s voice echoed from the en-suite and you turned around.
“if you cannot even pretend to support me, jennifer, what are we even doing here?”
jenni laughed and you huffed again, crawling next to alexia and nestling into her side. when the brunette finally joined you, you kicked at her, letting out a yelp when alexia gently pinched your thigh. “be nice, amor.”
“be nice,” you mocked her quietly under your breath. after a few seconds, you attempted to crawl out but was immediately pulled back by the blonde. “hey!”
“where are you going?” she asked, tightening her arms as you wriggled in her grip.
“i am owed a rematch.” you told her, prying at her hands.
“no.”
“no? uh, yes,” you tried to leave again but alexia quickly flipped you onto your back, laying on top of you so you couldn’t move. “aw, ale, get off!”
“no.”
“stop saying no to me,” you groaned, wrenching your arm free and reaching out for jenni. “help!”
“no!” alexia lifted her head and glared at you, grabbing your hand and pinning it to the bed. “it will not kill you to have an early night for once.”
“it might.” you muttered, earning yourself another pinch.
with how genuinely annoyed she sounded, you half expected alexia to shove you over to jenni but she didn’t. instead, her arms snaked around your body and she nuzzled further into you.
you pouted over at jenni and she kissed it from your lips, leaning over and flicking off the lamp. you glared into the darkness, feeling jenni press another kiss to your head.
after what felt like forever and you were sure that both jenni and alexia were asleep, you wriggled from your space between them and swiped your phone, quietly slipping out of the room.
you jumped onto the sofa and opened the lioness groupchat, typing only two words with determination flowing through your veins.
REMATCH NOW
-
…another series anyone??
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barcaatthemoon · 2 months
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jenni's girl || alexia putellas x reader ||
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alexia gets jealous watching you hang around your ex.
minors dni, 18+, smut ahead, bottom reader, top alexia
alexia was seething as she watched jenni flirt with you and buy you drinks. she knew that you knew what was going on, and yet, you still let it happen. alexia had pretty royally screwed up earlier in the day by completely dismissing you, but she still hadn't expected you to go running into jenni's arms the moment that you got into the club. especially not with the history surrounding the two of you.
that was why alexia was so scared. both of you had dated jenni, but alexia could see the lasting mark that had on you. sometimes she felt like all you wanted was to go crawling back to the older woman. she did her best not to think about the fact that she had been your rebound for jenni, but when she saw the way you hung off of the other woman's arm, it was impossible.
"has anyone ever told you that you need to relax?" mapi asked as she draped an arm around alexia's shoulder. alexia was quick to shrug it off as she continued to glare at you and jenni. "she wouldn't do that to you. maybe you're getting so upset because you're pro-,"
"i would never!" alexia shouted as she shoved mapi back. mapi's brows furrowed in anger before she stormed off. they were all supposed to be happy and celebrating, but alexia was having a bad enough time to ruin anybody else's night. you glanced away from jenni for the first time in probably 10 minutes to see alexia sitting by herself, obviously upset.
"go to her, but be careful. i wouldn't want to see you get hurt," jenni said. she pressed a kiss to your cheek, which alexia definitely did not miss. she got up from her seat and began to walk towards the exit, completely ignoring you as you followed her. the two of you managed to get outside and to the parking lot before alexia finally turned around to face you.
"i'm surprised you're not back in there with jenni," alexia scoffed. you frowned at her, deeply upset by the accusatory tone that she was using. "come on, i know that you miss her. i know that deep down, you'll always be hers because she had you first."
"it's not a competition like that, alexia. i'm with you because i love you. yes, i love jenni, but as nothing more than a friend now. you two are friends, and i don't act like you are whenever she asks you to hang out, do i?" you crossed your arms over your chest. if alexia wanted a fight, you were more than happy to give it to her. she was acting ridiculous, and there was no way that all of her anger had come from a single interaction between you and a mutual friend.
"prove it. prove to me that you're not jenni's girl anymore," alexia challenged.
"are you serious?" you asked her. alexia's facial expression didn't soften or move at all, giving you your answer. you rolled your eyes as you moved past her to get in the car. alexia was pissy with you on the drive home, ignoring you until the two of you got back home.
you learned just how serious alexia had been in the parking lot whenever the two of you got home. she had a tendency to shut you out a bit whenever she got jealous, but the tension between the two of you had been extremely horny. alexia found a good balance of that in pinning you against the wall and sliding her thigh in between yours while also denying you any sort of softer affection.
she seemed to relish in the desperate little whine you let out after being denied for several kisses. alexia was staring at you with watchful eyes, darkened by the thoughts of all the ways she'd turn you out to prove that you'd do anything for her. she couldn't wait to bend you over every surface in the house to fuck you senseless.
"ale," you pleaded with her after being denied another kiss. you looked up at her with your best puppy dog eyes and pout, which usually would have worked at any other time. you realized that you must have really messed up back at the club if she wouldn't even give you a second look now. "i'm sorry ale. please, just give me a kiss."
"jenni used to kiss you when she fucked you." alexia wasn't asking because she knew how jenni fucked. you let out a whimper as you crumpled against the wall a little. her face softened for a moment as she sighed and pulled you back up to stand straight. "cari?"
you were at a loss for what to do. you had apologized to alexia and tried to explain yourself, but she wasn't listening to you. in that moment, alexia could see the turmoil that she had been causing you. once she had softened, she looked more like your alexia. you had been fine playing things up whenever you knew that she wasn't genuinely pissed at you.
"i'm sorry," alexia apologized as she pressed a kiss to your forehead. you stepped forward into her arms, pushing both of you away from the door. "you have every right to be mad at me for acting like an ass."
"fuck me hard enough to make me forget about you being a dick. better yet, fuck me hard enough to make me forget how jenni used to." alexia looked surprised by the glint in your eyes, but she went along with it anyway. and if she needed a little more motivation, you had it ready on the tip of your tongue. "god, i don't think anybody has ever made me feel that satisfied. she used to fill me up so fucking good ale, i don't think you under-,"
alexia didn't even make it to the bedroom with you. she spun you around and pushed on your shoulders to bend you over the back of the couch. barely half a second passed before you felt alexia's body weight press against yours as she leaned forward to whisper into your ear, "stay right here, just like this. if you move an inch, i'll let you go see if jenni will take your bratty ass back."
you swallowed thickly as alexia backed away from you. she disappeared down the hallway before coming back just a couple of moments later. you wanted to turn your head to look at her, but you didn't doubt that she'd kick you out for the night. there was an edge to her voice, one that came along with a look of anger that you had seen earlier in the night. you knew that you'd be lucky if alexia let you finish by the end of the night.
"color?" alexia asked as she placed her hands on your skirt. you had worn a very short, leather miniskirt out. alexia had been appreciative of it on the car ride there, but not so much once everybody had filled into the club. many of the girls on the team thought that you were attractive and had attempted to get with you in between your relationships with jenni and alexia.
"green," you answered. alexia, thankfully, didn't rip your skirt as she removed it from your body. it was definitely something that she wanted to see you wear again, even if the moment someone else looked at you, she'd get all jealous and grumpy. alexia carefully set the skirt on the couch next to you, just barely in your eyeline.
"i'd mark your ass up, but i think you'd enjoy that a little too much," alexia told you. you knew that was far from the truth. all it had taken for you to decide that you weren't a fan of being spanked was one particularly wild night whenever you had first gotten together with alexia, one that you were surprised she remembered.
"fuck, ale," you moaned as you felt her fingers run over your center. your underwear were still on, but the press of alexia's fingers was anything but gentle. she wanted to make sure that you could feel everything.
"don't worry, i will," alexia promised. she pressed a line of kisses along your back as she slotted herself right up against you. you let out a gasp as you felt the strap-on that she had chosen for the night press against your cunt. alexia smirked with her lips pressed into the crook of your neck. "i just don't think you can handle it just yet. even with all that big talk, i'm not quite sure you could take my new toy."
"new?" you tried to turn your head back to look, but alexia held your neck firmly in place. you let out a whine as you were denied what you wanted, pulling a chuckle from alexia's lips.
"careful, if you keep this attitude up, i'll bring someone around and make you watch," alexia threatened. it was something the two of you had spoken about quite a bit, and despite how into it you were, alexia knew it would drive you wild. "imagine someone who would be good for me like ona getting all of your orgasms and kisses while you have to sit there all by yourself."
your cheeks were flushed and burning as your head was forced down. alexia's free hand came around to tear your underwear open. you were glad that alexia didn't get in moods like this often or else you'd be going broke trying to replace your clothes. she slipped two fingers inside of you slowly, scissoring them to stretch you open before she added a third.
"breathe," alexia instructed. she kept her hands still as she monitored your breathing. you took deep breaths, ones that alexia matched with gentle thrusts of her fingers. "when i take my fingers out, i'm putting the dildo in. it's the last time i'll be gentle for a while, are you ready?"
"wait!" you shouted out before alexia could move her fingers. "can i have a kiss first, please? alexia, it's all that i want."
"after, i promise," alexia said. you let out a little whine, but nodded for her to take her fingers out of you. she stayed true to her word, replacing her fingers with a harsh thrust of what was definitely a new toy inside of you. you hadn't gotten to see it, but it was thicker and longer than what you were used to.
alexia didn't break out the strap with you very often, generally only if you asked for it or she was really tired. this felt like she had custom ordered it or bought it from a high-end place. there were ribs and ridges that you could feel every bit of as she pounded into you harshly. the icing on the cake, however, was the slight curve that made sure she was fucking into all the right places with every thrust.
"fuck, ale. i'm cumming!" you were lucid enough to know that it was too quickly, but alexia didn't stop. she only grabbed you by the hair and fucked you even harder through your orgasm. she was being rougher than you had ever thought to ask her to be, knowing that she usually hated it a little.
the grip on her hair didn't let up as she continued to fuck you harshly. she managed to get you into your second orgasm quickly, which was when your legs really started to feel like jelly. alexia was supporting you fully now, your body not even touching the couch anymore. alexia briefly pulled out of you just to flip you over and place your body against the couch once more, only this time facing her.
"give me your legs," alexia commanded. you lifted them as much as you could, which wasn't very much at all. alexia scoffed as she just grabbed your thighs and manhandled you into the position that she wanted you. "color?"
"green," you answered weakly. alexia seemed to check on you before she took you at your word. the toy felt completely different from the new angle, and you were screaming out at the first few thrusts.
"shh, just take it," alexia told you. this stretch was completely different than the one before. "breathe, i won't have you passing out on me."
you tried to find a good breathing pattern while she was fucking you, but there really wasn't one. still, you took deep breaths when you could to keep your vision from going fuzzy around the sides. alexia leaned her forehead against yours, but she kept her hand on your jaw to keep you from leaning in any closer. she seemed to remember what she told you, which you had hoped that she wouldn't.
"one more, i know you have it in you. cum for me one more time and i'll give you all the kisses you can handle," alexia promised. you closed your eyes and pushed her head down towards your chest. alexia let you move her a little, knowing that you were getting so close.
"ale, fuck. i don't know if i can." your eyes were squeezed shut as you tried to focus on her fucking you. it was hard, but you knew that you had to try. you felt almost like you were going to cry as your body teetered on the edge of another orgasm. you were so sensitive that your body wasn't sure whether or not it liked the pleasure anymore.
"come on, please. i just want to watch you cum for me, please baby. show me that you're mine," alexia begged you. it was not what you had expected to hear, and the little whine in her voice sparked something in you.
"i'm yours, ale, yours," you repeated over and over until the words jumbled together. this time, you weren't screaming and moaning like the others, your mouth fell open silently as your head dropped back. alexia felt a gush of liquid coat her thighs and drip down onto the floor between your bodies.
"good girl," alexia mumbled as she leaned forward to kiss you. you were too out of it to properly kiss her back, whining once again. "are you okay?"
"i'm fine, ale," you promised her. she nuzzled her head against your neck to pepper a couple of kisses there. "how are you?"
"a little soaked, but i expected as much." you hadn't expected alexia to tell a joke. she carried you into the bathroom and laid you in the corner of the shower as she turned on the water. it wasn't until alexia was standing in there with you, cleaning you off, that you realized what she had said.
"you talked to jenni about fucking me, didn't you?" a part of you was angry, but it also intriguied you quite a bit. "that's how you knew what would happen if you switched with the third. you never take me from behind like that."
"i like to look at your pretty face," alexia said. she grabbed your cheeks and pressed a kiss to your lips. "next time, i'll ask first, i promise."
"next time?" you asked, incredulously. alexia nodded as she turned the water off and stepped out first. she wrapped herself up in a towel before grabbing the fluffy robe for you. "fine, but we need to talk about what you're going to do for me."
"excuse me?" alexia was taken aback by your tone more than anything else.
"i came for you like you asked, even though you were playing games with me and didn't tell me. you said i can have whatever i want, remember?"
"(y/n)," alexia sighed.
"no, alexia, you promised." you crossed your arms over your chest.
"okay then, what do you want?" alexia asked you.
"i want jenni to join us for a night next time she flies in to visit," you said. alexia's jaw dropped, but she couldn't argue with you. besides, she had ideas of her own along that vein that this would be a good trial for. "you promised, ale."
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sleekswosobession · 3 months
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you are broken on the floor
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alexia putellas x keeper!reader
overview: goalkeeping means sacrificing your body, how far would you go?
A/N: i feel rlly sad so i got the discord to come up with ideas (thanks @totaly-obsessed + @alotofpockets)
TW: Blood, Severe Injury, Brutal Angst
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Ever since a child, you loved the feeling of saving footballs. If any of the teams you were on needed someone in goals you'd be the first the volunteer, along the way you actually got good at it and eventually signed with Barcelona in 2021, making good friends along the way.
Along with joining Barça, it came with getting a girlfriend. Who was the best person you'd ever had in your life romantically.
Being a keeper in the best club would always mean injuries, trying to keep a clean sheet like any defensive player wants.
Sometimes though, injuries are worse. Life threatening in some cases, career ending in others. It's something no player even wishes upon their most rivalled team.
You just had to be unlucky didn't you?
Barcelona were comfortably winning against Frankfurt 3-0, when a gap in defense allows a German player to make their strike. You fall back onto the line hoping the punch the ball away.
Seems like life has other plans.
The player shoots left, you dive left and push the ball away. However with being airborne, you can’t stop. Your body crashes into the post with a loud thud.
The stadium goes quiet, your screams and cries horrific. Your body looks… wrong.
Your collarbone isn’t straight, it’s indescribable. Bones are poking out. There’s blood running down your face where your head has cracked open after hitting the post.
It’s sickening to watch.
Players immediately rush over, forming a circle around you as to not show a fellow player in such vulnerable state.
Alexia is by your side trying to comfort you, trying to keep you still. Seeing you in this much pain makes her heart ache. If she could take it all, she would.
Paramedics are by your side instantly as the circle of players back up to give them space to work, Alexia sits helplessly watching you worm in pain.
After quick testing to make sure you were still alive and conscious, they get you on the stretcher. Which includes more screaming, and more pain.
Alexia watches as you get taken off the field in a hurry, fans of both teams clap and give you a standing ovation.
“Alexia, she’s strong. Let’s finish and win this game for her yeah?” Mapi pats her best friends back, also devastated at the turn on events.
“Ye- yeah.” The captains broken voice says.
- - - - -
As the rest of the minutes in the game are being played, you’re fighting for your life in the back of an ambulance.
The pain getting unbearable, you find yourself slowly slipping in and out of consciousness. Paramedics are doing things around you, but your eyes are too glossy to really tell. Your mind is also too fuzzy to think straight.
There is one thing you want, Ale. But, with everything? You wouldn’t be surprised if you’ve ruined some of your vocal cords from screaming so loud.
Soon enough, you succumb to the darkness. Letting it engulf you to a place less ridden in pain and chaos.
- - - - -
The game is over, an unspoken heaviness in the air surrounding both teams. There is little interaction with fans, whom luckily understand the pain the players must be feeling at the time.
Alexia, Mapi and Ingrid get in the Norwegian’s car and drive straight to the hospital where the medical team said you were going to.
When arriving, Ingrid drops Alexia and Mapi before parking, understanding they need each other. You were important to everyone, but Mapi was like your sister and Ale was obviously your girlfriend.
They rush inside, talking quickly to the nurse at reception who gives them sorry smiles, updating them all that she could. Which was that you were alive and in emergency surgery.
They don’t argue, it’s pointless. So they sit down on uncomfortable plastic chairs, playing a waiting game until you were coherent and safe.
- - - - -
4 hours and many freak out sessions later, a doctor walks over to the three girls explaining the situation you’re in.
“It’s a grade 2 concussion to her head, in cases like these there is chance for memory loss. I believe she has all her memory, we were talking about different things before I came here. It’s a high possibility that she has no memories from the accident though.” He pauses before continuing.
“She experienced a dislocated collarbone. We’ve put it back in its original place, recovery could take 1 year and she might never be to the level she was at currently again. We had to do work on surrounding ligaments which makes the recovery time longer.” The girls take in the information.
“Have you told her she won’t play for a while?” Ingrid asks the question on everyone’s mind.
“I did, she was upset in her own right. If that is all your questions, she has her own room. I believe you all know concussion protocol?” They nod.
“Ok, room 3146. If you need anything at all just shout.”
“Gracias, for everything you’ve done.” The doctor smiles at Alexia.
“No problem.”
- - - - -
When reaching the room, the 3 Barça players see your state, a gauze wrapped around your head and a large cast across your torso, restricting movement.
“Amor?” Alexia asks cautiously.
“Hi Ale.” You look at the other two. “Mapi, Ingrid, nice to see you.”
Alexia sits by the chair on the side of your bed, looking up with teary eyes.
“Please, please don’t ever do that again.” She sobs, cradling your face softly. “I can’t- I can’t lose you.”
“Ale, you’ve got me. I’m right here, please don’t cry amor. Por favor.” You look over to the other two in the room, smiling softly.
She takes a couple minutes to settle down and finally talk.
“Have you heard about your recovery?”
“Sí” You watch her sigh, tracing patterns over your hand.
“Lo siento, but I’ll be with you the whole way ok? I promise.” She says without an inch of hesitation in her voice.
“Te amo mucho Ale. That means so much more than you could ever know.” She responds by leaving a lingering kiss against your hand.
“I’m glad you’re ok. Had as all worried.” Ingrid smiles lightly.
“Yeah.. I don’t remember much about what happened. I might later on but for now I’m content without the memories.” She laughs.
“Well, all of the culers and people at Barça wish you a safe and great recovery. Even if the doctor hasn’t said it, you’ll come back stronger I know it.”
“Thanks Maps, I think I stay in the hospital for a few more days then I’m clear to go home. I have to wear this for like 6 weeks then start the strengthening physio whatever.”
“Ah, can’t wait to see you on the pitch again then amiga. Well, Ingrid and I will leave you and Ale to talk on your own. If you ever need funny company instead of serious company I am always here.” You hold onto your laugh smirking.
“Alright León, keep it moving.” You joke back and watch the couple leave.
You think back to what recovery is going to be like. A very long journey. It seems your girlfriend notices your thoughts.
“Shh, you’ll be fine and as Mapi said you’ll come back better.”
“Thanks Ale.” She leans over and presses a kiss to your lips softly.
- - - - -
The next few weeks are tough, you feel as though you’re useless. Alexia has all this stuff on her plate already and you’re just another one. However she is always quick to shut those thoughts down. No matter how moody, or how angry you got at her. She stayed, just like she promised she would.
Who knows what the future holds, maybe something, maybe nothing. What does matter though? Is who you go there with. For you it’s Ale. It will always be Alexia.
—————————————————————————
PART 2 - here
also i did say i was sick now i’m feeling better.. physically (not mentally since i just wrote this fic)
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helen-with-an-a · 2 months
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I am an adult
Hi. So, this is an idea that I've been working on. I hope you enjoy it. <3
Barca Femeni x Reader
Part 1 : Part 2 : Part 3 : Part 3.5 : Part 4
TW: none
Word Count: 3.4k
Description: R is tired of being treated like a child
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Being the youngest in the club by quite some years when you first join the club is hard. You were 15 when you put pen to paper, debuting for your national team at 16. You automatically inherited about 40 big sisters at club and country, with all their wisdom, love, and overprotectiveness. It was adorable … at first. You couldn’t fault them for their heart. You knew they meant well. But you were ready to strangle them by the time you turned 18. You had been given offers from all over the world as your contract ended. It was a difficult choice to leave your team; most of them you considered family. But it wasn’t a difficult choice to sign for Barcelona.
You had hoped that as you left your home and started a new chapter in life, you could prove that you weren’t a child anymore. But it quickly became apparent that that wasn’t the case. Alexia hovered, Lucy fussed, Marta fretted, and Irene worried. You had originally moved in with Alexia, which was lovely initially. She helped you organise the parts of your life that were new to you – organising your weekly shopping list, helping manage your finances, and coordinating your schedules. But as the years went by, you think she forgot that you were no longer the barely legal adult who needed help with many things. You think they all forgot.
The first incident that made you slightly pissed off was in the changing rooms. The music was loud, and you were too busy grinding on Pina to notice the looks from Lucy and Marta. You were celebrating another spectacular win, you scoring a hat trick and Patri and Salma scoring braces. You had taken your sweaty shirt off and swung it around your head as you turned to press yourself against Bruna, all 3 of you laughing as you ran your hands down your body, shaking your hips sensually. As the song ended, you were all in fits of laughter, clutching your stomachs and breathing hard.
“Where did you learn to dance like that?” Ona asked, her arms wrapping around your waist as you slung an arm around her shoulders.
“Oh, shut up. You’ve seen me dance plenty of times,” You joked as you kissed her forehead.
“You’ve been out dancing?” Lucy asked. She didn’t like the sound of that. You were too young to go out.
“Yeh, we went out a few weeks ago,” Ona told her.
“Who is we?” Alexia frowned.
“Um … me, Ona, Patri, Pina, Jana, Bruna, Esmee, Aitana,” you rattled off their names, counting them on your fingers as you went. Basically, it was all the young ones who could legally drink. It had been an entertaining night. No one was telling you to calm it down. No one breathed down your neck as you chatted to random strangers. No one was hovering. It was fantastic. You had spent most of the next day with your head over the toilet and feeling very sorry for yourself. But it was worth it. You wouldn’t let them dampen your spirits over that night. Lucy was frowning hard; Alexia also gave an angry glare. “What?” You asked, confused about why you were having disapproving scowls sent your way.
“You’re too young,” Lucy said as she turned away. You huffed, muttering under your breath as you headed to the showers. You were starting to get irritated with their behaviour.
The second time they made you angry was when you stumbled home from a night-in with Pina and Patri. You had chatted away the evening over good food and wine. It was a lovely night, bringing you even closer to the pair of best friends. What you hadn’t been aware of, however, was Lucy and Alexia, and Marta, and Caro, and Paños, and Irene. They all blew up your phone, asking where you were and what you were doing. Alexia had asked Lucy to come over as she noticed you looked a little less like yourself. You were acting short with her, not really acknowledging her when she gave her (unwanted) input on what you were doing and with whom you were doing it. She had hoped that Lucy could help you navigate what was going on. As Alexia opened your bedroom door, without knocking – once again – she was met with a slightly messy but very empty room with a pile of clothes on the floor near the hamper. She must tell you that you need to do your washing.
“Lucy,” Alexia had called out in a panic. You weren’t anywhere else in the house. She didn’t know where you were. She had promised your parents all those years ago that she would look after you. “She’s gone. She’s not here. She’s missing. Should we phone the police?” She grew more and more desperate with every passing moment.
“Right. Calm down, alright? She couldn’t have gone far. She can’t drive,” she was wrong – you could drive; you even had your own car, but the older team members refused to let you go anywhere without them or let you behind the wheel if they were in the car. “Let’s check her location, yeh?” You had asked her repeatedly to delete the app from her phone. She had ignored your wishes, telling you that due to your age, someone should always know your whereabouts. “See, she’s at Patri’s. She’s fine.” The pair took calming breaths together. As the hours ticked by and it seemed like you were making no appearance any time soon, more people were called to come and wait for you. First, it was Marta and Caro and then Paños after another hour and finally Irene after another 2. It was 3 am when you stumbled into the house, slightly wine-drunk but more or less sober.
“What time do you call this?” Alexia’s voice called out from the shadows. It was angry; you didn’t need to see her face to know that her signature glare was etched on it.
“Oh, I didn’t think you’d be awake,” you commented, moving into the kitchen and flicking the lights on as you went. You jumped slightly as you were faced with four other women, all of whom were in similar states of anger and disapproval. "Jesus Christ. What did you do? Throw a party or something?”
“A search party more like. You snuck out.” Irene commented, folding her arms over her chest and giving you her best Mum look.
“Is it really sneaking out if I leave through the front door?” you countered, filling a glass with water and looking in the medicine box under the sink. “Do we have any paracetamol?” you asked absentmindedly, not quite realising just how angry the group was.
“Why do you need paracetamol, kid?” Lucy asked, knowing the answer already but not wanting the confirmation.
“Oh, I had a few drinks with Patri and Pina. Wanna have them in my room with some water for tomorrow if I need them,” you said, letting out a small ‘aha’ when you found the medicine you were looking for.
“You’ve been drinking?” Marta screeched.
“Yeh?” You drew out the word, slightly too tipsy for this conversation.
“What? That’s it, you’re grounded. For-” Alexia stormed forwards.
“You can’t ground me, Alexia,” you said incredulously, standing up and facing her. You may be younger, but you were slightly taller than her. “I’m not a child.”
“How da-” she started, raising her voice at you. You held up a hand, cutting her off. You were mightily fed up with her behaviour as of late. You clicked your teeth.
“I’m going to bed.” You sighed, pushing past the group standing in the hallway and stomping up the stairs.
“Don’t you dare slam your-” She shouted but was cut off by a harsh slam.
By the third time, you were ready to scream. Or commit murder. You weren’t too fussed – whichever got them to stop. After the night with Patri and Pina, Alexia tried to ban you from doing anything outside of training. You had raised one eyebrow at her and walked straight out the door. She was shocked, to say the least. Where was this attitude coming from? She had been nothing but nice to you, helping you out when she thought you needed it and offering advice when you looked a little stressed. She had had enough of your door slamming and locking the door. So, she did the only thing she could think of. You walked back into the house with Ona by your side, chatting away about the coffee shop you wanted to try. You could hear the faint whirring of power tools coming from upstairs. It was a known fact that Alexia hated building flat-pack furniture, so you went to investigate – beckoning for Ona to follow, thinking it would be funny to see the disaster that Alexia was making. The sight that met you had you screaming and shouting. Alexia was taking your bedroom door off its hinges.
“What the fuck?” You shouted, anger your dominant emotion.
“Language!” She said calmly as she finished with the final nail.
“Seriously, what the actual fuck, Alexia? You’re taking my door off?”
“Sí. You kept slamming it. I told you not to slam the door. And it’s not your door. It’s mine. I own the house.”
“In that case, when do you want me to move out? Can I have a few hours to pack?” She scoffed, thinking you were bluffing. You were most certainly not bluffing. You looked over to Ona, standing at the top of the stairs, slightly embarrassed at witnessing the clearly private situation.
“You are too young to move out, cariño. Once you learn to respect those who are trying to help you, I’ll put the door back on,” she said simply, pushing the door onto its side and moving past you. “Hi, Ona,” she said sweetly.
You immediately gathered up a suitcase full of clothes and forced Ona to take you to her place. Spending time in an environment where you weren’t treated as a child only grew your resentment towards others. You loved being treated as the adult that you were. You spent a few nights with Ona before moving to Patri’s and Pina’s. You had ignored all the older girls' efforts to talk to you. They still muttered and moaned about how you weren’t old enough and that they were only trying to help, to do what was best for you. Eventually, you decided you needed your own place – sleeping on couches and pull-out beds was not good for your body.
“Um, I just wanted to let you know I’m moving out. Officially.” You approached Alexia one morning in the gym. It had been about a month, and you still hadn’t returned to her house. Everyone’s anger had been building up slowly.
“No. Absolutely not.” Alexia shut you down immediately.
“Ale,” you sighed. This wasn’t Alexia’s choice. You had already found a place nearer to the training centre. It was cute with old, patterned tiled flooring and exposed brick.
“No. You're too young to live by yourself.” You sighed, not willing to argue about this again.
“Ale, I … I’ve already got a place. I’ve put a deposit down already. I am moving out,” you sheepishly. The look of horror on her face was laughable. You would have thought you said you were skinning Nala and using her fur as clothing. “Um…” She held up a hand, stopping you from speaking. You had only really told her out of courtesy. You had been back to her house several times when she wasn’t home, slowly packing your stuff. The wardrobes were basically empty already; you just had to take down the decorations. It wasn’t like you had many up anyway. You had always thought of it as you sleeping in Alexia’s spare room; it was never yours. And you didn’t want it to be. You tried to speak again, but she just waved you off, turning on her heels and walking away, shaking her head.
After you had officially moved out, training was more awkward than ever. The older players constantly switched between throwing you sympathetic glances, angry glares, and disappointed looks. You had tried not to let it bother you. It honestly didn’t … for a while. In the beginning, it was nothing you weren’t used to. And then they were muttering about you within earshot. Talking amongst themselves over how rude you had been, they had only tried to help you. You were too young, and you were being disrespectful towards them. It really began to bother you, not to the point where your training and playing were affected, but in your personal life. The team had a definite rift, and you were starting to think you were the cause of it.
It was a random Monday morning when things finally came to a head.
“Oh my god!” Bruna squealed as you lifted your top up and over your head. “What are those, Miss Y/S/N?”
“What are what?” You were very confused. Jana gasped as she also spotted something, pointing at your chest. Hickeys. A line of dark purple splotches littered your chest and stomach.
“Fuck. She said she wouldn’t leave marks.” You groaned. You had gone out on Saturday night after the match with some of the younger girls and ended up leaving with a random girl. It was fun; she had stayed the night, and you had made her a coffee the following day before going your separate ways.
“Was she a vampire, Jesus?” Ona laughed, trying to poke at one of the particularly dark ones.
“Oi,” you battered her hand away, laughing all the same. “I’ve seen the aftermaths of your nights out, young lady. You have no leg to stand on,” laughing harder at the blush blooming on her cheeks.
“What. Are. Those?” Alexia boomed, bringing silence over your little group.
“Um, hickeys?” You answered, already tired of her controlling attitude.
“And how did you get them?” She replied. You raised an eyebrow at her.
“You had sex?” Lucy chimed in, disbelieving you.
“Yeh?” Her eyes widened; you were too young to be having sex. She opened her mouth to speak again. “If you’re about to give me the sex talk, don’t bother. That ship sailed long ago.” That stunned her. You had had sex on multiple occasions? She could feel her brain melting slightly.
“When?” Caro asked quietly, unsure whether she wanted to know that particular answer.
“Before I even came to Barca. I’d just signed my first contract. It was a friend from back home, it was nice. We’re still mates, so,” you filled her and the rest of the changing room in – totally open to confessing when you lost your virginity.
“You are too young to-” Alexia started, planning on berating you for your choices.
“Oh, shut up, Alexia.” You shouted. If you thought the changing room was quiet earlier, you could hear a pin drop now. No one shouted at Alexia. Ever. There were a few supercharged seconds. You refused to break eye contact with her. “I am not. Too. Young. I am a fully grown adult. You need to start realising that.” You looked around. “You all do.” You grabbed a random t-shirt and stormed out of the room.
The room was deadly silent. No one dared speak; no one dared even move for fear of retribution. At least Caro had the decency to look a little ashamed; everyone else was fuming.
A bang on the door broke the silence. “Apresúrate,” Jonatan shouted. The younger girls quickly gathered their stuff and rushed out, keeping their heads low and eyes trailing on the ground.
“That little-” Lucy started.
“Enough.” Ingrid cut her off. Ingrid had seen the way they had been treating you. She had heard the comments about how they deemed you too young to do normal things for a young adult to do. “All of you, enough.” They had never heard Ingrid shout before – irritated, sure, pissed off, yes, angry, never. “I am sick and tired of seeing how you treat that woman. She might have joined the team when she was young. But she is now an adult. And you refuse to see her as such. No wonder she snapped.” Alexia tried to cut in. “No, Ale. I know you mean well; you all do. I don’t doubt that. But you have told her off for going out, for drinking, for having sex. These are all normal things. She is safe, and she is happy. Surely, that is all that matters? If it was me, I would have snapped long, long ago. You are lucky; all she did was shout at you.” She turned to get her things. “Don’t come outside until you’ve thought about how to make this right with her,” Ingrid commanded as she stormed off.
The group was initially angry, ranting and raging over your behaviour, then they were slightly less angry with you and more at themselves. Eventually, they were silent, reflecting on how poorly they treated you. Alexia was the guiltiest. She felt so mortified over her treatment of you. Yes, you were a child when you first joined, but now you were a young woman who wanted her own life. They didn’t know how to apologise to you. As they traipsed into training, you refused to look at them.
Over the next few days, you didn’t acknowledge their presence at all. If they approached you in the canteen, you swiftly moved away. If they tried to pair up with you at training, you ran off before they could ask. They had tried to corner you in the changing rooms, but you had slipped out the door before they could move. You couldn’t help but laugh at the irony of it all. You had been pleading with them for months, years even, to treat you like an adult and yet, no, you were acting like a stroppy child.
It eventually became too much for the surrounding team, however, as Patri innocently shouted across the room that you would be at home tonight, alone. And Jana had openly yelled back with your full address, watching with quiet amusement as Lucy scribbled it down.
The knock on your door surprised you. It was only 7pm, not too late for anyone to come over, but no one had asked you or told you they would be making an appearance at your home. You didn’t bother looking through the little glass window as you threw open the door, about to question whoever it was. You froze when you were greeted with the sight of Alexia, Lucy, Marta, Caro and Paños. They had various looks of embarrassment on their faces, and Alexia had a big bouquet of your favourite flowers.
“What?” You asked, not really in the mood for them and any efforts they might have to persuade you to move back in with Alexia.
“Can we come in?” Paños asked. You sighed, knowing you would rather not have this conversation in front of your neighbours. Stepping aside, you eyed them carefully as they stepped into your flat.
“I like your place,” Lucy said awkwardly as you all came to rest at the kitchen table.
“Thanks.” You said bluntly, not really in the mood for this.
“Y/N,” Alexia spoke up. “I … we … I would like to apologise for, well, everything. We … I should have recognised that you are not a child. I am truly sorry.”
“Ok …” you looked between the group, all of them echoing similar sentiments.
“Ok? That’s it?” Marta was a little shocked that you were letting them off the hook so quickly.
“Do you want me to be mad at you? Cos, I’ll happily go back to ignoring you.” You answered. “All I ask is that you treat me like the adult I am. Yes, I go out. Yes, I get drunk. Yes, I have casual sex. Yes, I have one-night stands. All of these are normal adult things. The others do the same, yet you don’t jump on their backs about it. I’m just asking for you to treat me the way you treat them … like an adult.”
It was a slow process, and a few stray comments were still muttered under their breaths, but you could see they were trying. That’s all you could ask for—that they tried.
I hope you enjoyed it. I wasn't quite sure how to end it - if you couldn't tell ahahaha <3 There may be a pt2
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leah-lover · 24 days
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Entangled desires. Leah Williamson x Alexia putellas x reader.
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Part 1
“ Fuck me!” You semi yelled at your TV.
“Only if you beg me for it.” Said your girlfriend with a smirk on her face. You were both laying on the couch. She was laying on your lap reading a book, while you were watching the Arsenal vs Chelsea game. Chelsea have just broke through the backline and scored a goal. In their defense the goal was pretty incredible, but you hated that your team got scored against.
“ I would love for you to fuck me amor but not now, I am too busy “ you joked. “You have been stressed for about 50 minutes now. I think you need a release.” She said sarcastically, The book is now laying on her chest. “ Mi Reina, this game is so important for my sanity right now.” you respond. She didn't talk after that, she just turned on her side, her head still on your lap. She put the book aside and focused on the game.
The rest of the match was pretty exciting. There were some missed shots from both teams, a goal from Arsenal, some decent shot blocks from the Arsenal defense, and just overall a lot of tension. Alexia stood up from your lap by the time the final whistle blew. She was alert and satisfied. You were more than happy with Chelsea's defeat since you were a die hard Arsenal supporter. As a result, in celebration, you kissed your girlfriend. The kiss was soft and filled with passion. You then pushed Alexia on her back, straddled her lap and kissed her hard. You didn't want any space between you two. You were hungry for her, needy for her, all you wanted was her touch. The adrenaline from the game took over your body. Suddenly, it all went away and was replaced by tiredness. “ It's okay baby it happens.” She confronted you because you pulled out of the kiss and sighed loudly.
“ I am so sorry.” You apologized. “ Let's go cook dinner instead. Then we can finish later.” She added, a small smile on her face.
At the dinner table you sat opposite each other. You were both comfortable in the silence.
“ That arsenal defense was really good today.” She said, breaking the silence.
“Yeah, most of them are lionesses, so they are pretty good.” You answer.
“ Leah Williamson, the center back, is the captain of England right?”
“ She is the captain, she also captained the team today. She is pretty good.”
“ She was excellent today, made some pretty good deflections.”
“ And?”
“ What do you mean?.”
“ Mi Reina, tell me what you think.”
“ Well she is kind of attractive I guess. If you tell this to someone you won't like your punishment.”
“ Baby relax,I won't. I promise. Now let's go finish what we started after the game.”
“ What do you think about her?”
“ Leah ? Well I agree with you she is hot.”
—----------------
Tonight was one of the best nights of the year. The fifa best awards. This night was special because you were being awarded the best female player in the world which made you very proud of yourself. You were also proud of your girlfriend who made it into the best starting 11 in the world along with you and a few legends of the game.
You and Alexia got ready in the same room. You decided on an emerald green corseted dress that highlighted your chest and your brown hair. Alexia decided on an all black 3 piece suit paired with a red lip and her hair down.
The day leading to the ceremony had nothing out of the ordinary. You did your media duties, got ready, and left for the red carpet.
You and Alexia looked like a power couple, all the cameras were on you two, two of the most awarded and talented footballers. The ceremony was no different either. Kelley Smith presented you with your award and you thanked the most important people in your life in your speech. You talked to a few people but that was it. All the fun started at the after party.
While you were at the bar getting drinks your girlfriend was far from you talking to some people.
“Can I get two vodka sodas please?” You asked the bartender.
“Can you please make that tree?” Said a British voice from behind you. You turned around to find that the voice was Leah's.
“ Vodka soda is the athlete's best choice of drink right? ?“ she asked.
“ I guess so.” you respond.
“ I am Leah Williamson.” She added.
“ I know who you are. You are pretty recognizable.”
“ Not as much as the woman of the hour. Congrats on your award by the way. Spanish football is lucky to have you.”
You blushed at her words, that's when your drinks were ready. You wanted to talk to her more.
“ Why don't you join me and Alexia at our table?.” You asked hoping to get a yes
“Only for a little while I have my own people to tend to.” She responded.
You proceeded to guid Leah to your table. On your way there you passed alexia who said goodbye to the people she was with to join you too.
“ Ale this is Leah williamson. Leah, this is my lovely girlfriend Alexia.” you introduced the girls.
“ It's very nice to meet you alexia. We should have met a long time ago.” said Leah
“ I am glad we met too. How are you finding the night.” said Alexia. You knew your girlfriend well to know when she is nervous and right now she was clearly nervous, other people wouldn't spot it very well.
“ it's pretty boring actually. This is the most exciting thing that happened tonight.” responded Leah.
Your relationship with Alexia was common knowledge. However, Leah was flirting with the both of you for the better part of the hour and a half that Leah stayed with you. Throughout this time you talked about everything from football to your childhood. Several compliments and flirtatious attempts were made by all 3 of you. Leah’s phone was ringing for most of the time but she didn't answer. She then got a text saying that her teammates left and that she should go to the hotel because the party venue was almost empty. You didn't realise the time that passed, you were too immersed in the fun all of you were having. You were sitting on a couch, Alexia’s hand on your thighs occasionally caressing them, and Leah sat opposite you on a chair.
“ I can't believe they left without me.” she complained.
“ Well they did call you several times but you blew them off.” you responded.
“ but still how am i supposed to talk to them and miss out a second with you two.”
“ You can come with us. We are staying at the same hotel right?” suggested Alexia.
“ yeah but I don't want to intrude.”
“ nonsense, consider it an extension of this lovely night.” you added.
You then got out of the venue. You held Alexia’s hand while Leah walked to your other side.
The car ride was quiet. “ I would kill for a burger right now.” you whispered in your girlfriend’s ear because you were nuzzled in her neck. She then ushered for the driver to change direction to the nearest fast food chain.
“ one quick stop before we release you.” you apologized to leah running you hand on her thigh quickly.
“ No, not at all. I really want this to go on forever.” she responded.
The car stopped, you got your order, Leah and Alexia got a meal too after you provoked your puppy eyes.
You were now blissful on the hotel floor, and eating your burger with Leah Williamson and Alexia putellas. You were focused more on leah than on your burger.
“ shit i dont have my key card. I left it with Keira. God i am such a fucking idiot. ” she said after she finished.
“ Don't ever say that about yourself.” said Alexia who was quieter than usual.
“ what she means is it's fine you can stay here. it's too late to wake her up.” you corrected.
“ No, I can't do that .” she said frantically.
“ Yes you can and you will. It's too late to do anything. Plus we can hang out more. And we can put it to a vote and we both want you here.” said alexia before taking the last bite of her burger.
“ Alexia I can't. There is something. I just can't.” she said before heading towards the door.
Alexia got up and stopped her by her wrist. “ Look, it's alright, stay. Please. “ she said softly.
“ alexia almost never says please.” you added.
“ There is this unresolved tension in me. I can't hide it anymore.” she added, now looking at the floor.
Alexia lifted her head up by her chin, and at that moment we were all nervous. We all shared a look with each other, then looked at the floor, then at each other again. The silence was deafening. We all were thinking the same thing. It was just the matter of who starts.
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gunnerfc · 1 month
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Next Step | Alexia Putellas x Reader (18+)
Summary: your first time with Alexia
Warnings: top alexia, bottom reader, strap use (r receiving), alexia calling r ‘bebita’ and ‘mi amor’
WC: 2.2k 
AN: I lost the request for this but to whoever requested, I hope you enjoy!
You giggled loudly as you watched Mapi stumble back to the table, drinks in hand for those who were still there. The defender cheered loudly as she placed the shots on the table, your teammates who were drinking were quick to grab one. You opted out of drinking tonight, not wanting to drink during the season. You curled into Alexia’s side as you watched Mapi and Patri down their shots. 
Alexia had a tight hold on your waist as she sipped her water, she also opted out of drinking during the season. You laid your head on her shoulder, giggling when Ingrid pulled Mapi’s drink from her hands, attempting to cut her off for the night. Alexia turned her head slightly to place a light kiss on the top of your head. 
The two of you had been dating for a few months and you were over the moon. You were nervous when you first moved to Barcelona, you didn’t know anyone and immediately started feeling homesick. Alexia, as the captain, took it upon herself to show you around and help you get familiar with your new city. Soon her tours turned into dates before she clumsy asked you to be her girlfriend after you spent the evening exploring Barcelona.
You immediately said yes, having fallen hard for the blonde the moment she first spoke to you. Here you were a few months later and head over heels in love with her. After your first kiss, you decided that transferring to Barcelona was the best decision you ever made. You still believe that as you sat next to her a crowded club with loud music bouncing off the walls. 
“Are you ready to go, mi amor,” Alexia whispered into your ear so you could hear her.
You nodded your head against her shoulder before sitting up in the booth. Alexia excused the both of you, telling all your teammates to get home safely. You waved goodbye to those paying attention, letting Alexia guide you through the crowded dance floor. When you finally exited the club, Alexia wrapped her arm around your waist as you two took your time walking to her car. 
The midfielder opened the passenger side door for you and you thanked her with a quick peak before getting into the car. Alexia was quick to her side, starting the car as soon as she was in the driver’s seat. She placed one of her large hands on your headrest as she turned to watch behind her as she backed up. You’ve watched her do this many times before but something about it now was affecting you more than usual. 
You shook your head slightly to get rid of the thoughts you were having. Despite being together for almost six months, the two of you have yet to take the next step in your relationship. Between international breaks and the very busy club schedule, you have had much time to yourselves to do anything. But now, as you stared at Alexia’s side profile with your eyes drifting toward her hands that were gripping the steering wheel, you hoped tonight would be the night.
“Are you okay, y/n/n,” the midfielder questioned as she pulled up to a stop light.
Before you could answer, one of her hands left the steering wheel and landed on your thigh. She gave your thigh a small squeeze and you felt your breathing pick up. You swallowed lightly before nodding and whispering a small “yeah.”  
Alexia watched your chest heave slightly as you stared out the window. She could tell she was affecting you and she smirked to herself as she drove off once the light turned green. Alexia would be lying if she said she hadn't thought about the two of you taking the next step, it's all she's been able to think about for the past week.
Each time she's seen you sweaty after a game or training her mind ran wild with thoughts about you being sweaty and out of breath from other activities. She kept her hand on your thigh, her thumb moving softly against the fabric of your jeans. It was a small amount of contact but it was enough to affect you greatly. 
You had already established you would stay the night at Alexia’s place since you had the day off tomorrow. This was the perfect opportunity you needed to finally take the next step and you were beyond ready. When you finally reached Alexia’s apartment complex you both were quick to throw your seats off and exit the car. Alexia reached for your hand when you both reached the front of the car, her large hand holding yours tightly as she pulled you to the elevator once you were inside.
You resisted the urge to groan when the elevator took its time reaching the lobby, you could feel your arousal growing rather quickly. When the elevator finally dinged and its’ doors opened, you were glad there was no one else waiting to get on with you. Alexia pulled you lightly into the elevator before hitting her floor number. As the doors closed, her lips were on yours in a rushed kiss. 
Your lips moved against hers harshly as you both fought for dominance before Alexia won, as usual. You gasped lightly when you felt her hands on your ass and she took her opportunity for her tongue to slip past your lips to explore your mouth. Your arms tighten around her neck as you arched into her just as the elevator dinged once more as you reached her floor.
You two pulled away, panting as both of your eyes darkened with arousal. Alexia all but pulled you to her apartment, throwing the door open the second she had it unlocked. Your back was shoved against the door and her lips were on yours once again. You two had made out plenty of times before but this felt way different.
Your arms locked around her neck as hers ran up and down your torso, pulling at the material of your shirt. You moaned into the kiss when Alexia’s large hands groped your breasts. Alexia pulled back at the sound you made, her eyes larger as she stared at you. The blonde leaned back in, her lips glazing yours before she mumbled ‘jump.’ You were lifted off the floor, your legs wrapping around her torso as she carried you to her bedroom.
You’ve been in her bedroom and slept in her bed numerous times since you started dating but now, it was a whole new experience. Your back met the familiar mattress as Alexia laid you down, her body resting slightly on top of yours. Your lips moved against each other’s as she started pushing your shirt up your body before it reached your neck. She pulled back to give you room to pull the piece of clothing off and tossed it aimlessly to the floor.  
Alexia was quick to remove the bra you wearing as well, her lips moving to your neck once the material was off your body. The bra joined your shirt on the floor to be picked up later. Alexia’s lips traced any inch of skin it could reach, leaving small nips here and there. You moved a hand to tangle in her hair as one of her hands moved to your bare chest. You whine softly when her cold hand massages your breast, pulling your hardened nipple slightly.
Your back arched off the mattress slightly, pressing into her palm as she kneaded your skin. After littering kisses and hickies along your neck and collarbones, Alexia pulled away from your body. “Take the rest of it off,” the midfielder ordered softly, gesturing with her finger to your pants.
She got off the bed to give you room to do so as she moved to her closest, stripping her clothing as she moved. Your eyes traced her body as you took off your remaining articles of clothing, kicking them both to the floor. When Alexia returned, she was fully naked and carrying a strap in her hand. Your breathing picked up and you felt yourself grow wetter at the sight of her with the sex toy.
You rubbed your thighs together to create some sort of relief for your dripping cunt but it was not doing anything for you. You waited patiently as you laid back against her pillows as Alexia harnessed the strap on to her body. When she finally looked up at you, the sight of you had her head spinning. You were waiting for her to tell you what to do but her taking her time was driving you crazy.
“Get on your hands and knees, bebita,” Alexia’s voice was lower, her arousal lacing her words.
You hurriedly moved to the position she said, not wanting to delay any form of release. Once you were on your hands and knees, Alexia joined you on the bed, resting on her knees behind you. Alexia could see from her position just how wet you were and she had to bite back a groan at the sight of your wet cunt. Her hands moved to grip your ass, squeezing it softly a few times earning her low whines from you. The blonde smirked as she listened to your cries, enjoying how much she affected you.
Her hands moved to hold your waist, her thumbs moving back and forth on your back as she sat up some. She moved one of her hands to the base of the toy between her legs, tracing the tip through your soaked folds. You moaned loudly at the feeling, your hips moving back in an attempt to feel more. 
Alexia took that as a sign that you were ready and pushed the toy into you. You gasped loudly at the feeling, the strap on much larger than those your previous partners used. Alexia pushed until the toy bottomed out, her hips flush with your skin. “Does that feel good, bebita,” Alexia’s voice was still low but her desire to make sure you were okay was evident in her tone.
“Feels so good,” you responded through broken gasps as you got used to the size of the toy.
Alexia pulled back slightly, pulling the toy out almost fully before thrusting her hips toward you. Her skin hits yours as she thrusts, the toy hitting deep inside you. Your head dropped as you moaned, you could feel your arms already starting to give out. The blonde started a slow rhythm, her hips hitting your ass each time she moved. 
Alexia maintained her tight hold on your waist with each thrust, keeping your hips close to her. Your loud moans mixed with the lewd sounds of her fucking you echoed around the room. “Faster, Ale, p-please,” you begged as best as you could, hoping she would listen.
Alexia listened and her hips sped up, the toy hitting even deeper. Your arms buckled under you and your top half fell to the bed. Alexia kept your hips up as she drilled into you, not wasting any time. Your hands gripped the cover as her skin hit yours and you screamed her name into the sheets. 
“P-please don’t s-stop,” you mumbled, unsure if she even heard you.
Alexia could feel herself closer to coming just from fucking you. How the two of you hadn’t done this yet was blowing her mind. Now that she’s had you like this, she couldn't get enough. Your back arched as you felt yourself close to the edge. Alexia held you tightly as she fucked you, each thrust bringing you closer to an earth-shattering orgasm.
“I’m so close, Ale,” you whined as you felt the familiar coil in your lower stomach tighten. 
Alexia railed into you harder earning loud moans and chants of ‘please’ from you. With a loud moan, you came all over the strap on. Alexia didn’t slow her hips, she was close to coming as well and she wanted to help you ride out your high. You whined at the feeling, the stimulation was overbearing. 
Alexia’s hips stuttered as she let go, coming just from fucking you. Her hips came to a stop before she pulled the toy out of you softly. You whined at the loss of contact before your hips dropped to the bed. Alexia undid the harness around her, tossing the sex toy to the floor to be cleaned up later.
You panted against the bed as you tried to catch your breath, your hair sticking to your body due to sweat covering you. Alexia moved to rest beside you, moving a finger to push back some of your hair off your forehead. 
“Why haven't we done that before now,” you croaked, a small smile on your face as you rolled to your back. 
Alexia chuckled at your words before leaning in to kiss you. This kiss was softer than the previous ones that night. She pulled away after a moment before whispering “te amo” against your lips. You gave a her quick peak before saying it back, a light red tint coating her midfielder’s cheeks as you did so.
You were thrilled to have finally taken the next step with Alexia, but now you were worried about never getting enough of her.
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ktgoodmorning · 2 months
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Silent Communications
(love language series- physical touch)
Mapi Leon x Reader
Inspired by the love language physical touch- The team doesn't know you and Mapi are dating and you struggle to keep it hidden throughout your away game travels
Words of affirmation felt too obvious of a choice for the Mapi fic. I swear that eventually I will manage to write something shorter and less fluffy but today is not that day. Anyways, I'd love any feedback or requests any one has, my inbox is always open.
The rest of the love language series:
Perfect. A.Bonmati x reader. Quality time.
Let me spoil you. C.Coll x reader. Giving and receiving gifts.
Broken. P.Guijarro. Acts of service.
You know I love you. A.Putellas. Words of Affirmation
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Masterlist
The team was unaware of your relationship with Mapi. Everyone knew you had been best friends for most of your lives and attributed your closeness to that. They knew you tended to be touchy and cuddly together but still never thought much of it because the two of you had always been that way. It also helped your case being Spanish. They were completely unaware that your relationship had turned romantic. They’d occasionally tease you for your closeness, but it didn’t bother you. You knew they meant no harm and often you were willing to join in joking.
Eight months ago, you and your best friend confessed your feelings for each other. Growing up together, you had only become closer as you got older. It didn’t surprise you. From the time you were a teenager, you knew your feelings for Mapi were different. For a while you couldn’t pinpoint why, it wasn’t until teammates would tease you about how you were “basically dating” that you realized it was true. Or at least you wanted it to be true. You learned to ignore those feelings, trying to preserve your friendship. It was more important to you to keep her close than to act on your feelings. However things changed when you had caught on that she might be feeling the same way. You’d catch her staring at you, looking at you differently than she used to. She’d always be doing little things to help you out- bringing you coffee, carrying your bag for you, buying you dinner. There were little touches here and there that just felt different. It was always small things but felt so big. 
The longer you noticed your best friend acting this way, the more it drove you crazy. One day when you were out to breakfast with Alexia, you decided to get her opinion on the matter. You were tired of trying to ignore your feelings. She knew Mapi just as well as you did, and you knew she’d be honest with you. When you asked her if she thought there was any chance of Mapi sharing your feelings, the older woman looked at you like you were crazy. “Isn’t it obvious?” she said. “I thought you already knew, that girl’s crazy about you.” 
From then on, your world changed. You left your breakfast date with Alexia to go straight to Mapi’s house- a place that was basically your second home. The two of you had a long conversation, spilling your hearts out to each other. You discussed what you wanted to do, how to move forward. Ultimately you had both decided you wanted to try dating but planned to take things slow, making sure you weren’t doing anything that could risk your friendship in the process. 
Things couldn’t have gone better. Your friendship transitioned seamlessly into dating. It was better than either of you could have imagined (and you both spent plenty of time imagining it). In the last eight months, you continued to grow closer in ways you hadn’t even known possible and were happier than you had ever been before. 
You had decided not to tell anyone about your relationship. It just seemed easier that way. If people knew about your growing romance you’d have to deal with the media, the criticism of teammates dating, the fans, and any outside opinions that didn’t matter to you. Neither of you wanted any of that, you just wanted each other. You didn’t intend to keep it a secret for this long but somewhere along the way you became accustomed to it and it just felt easier than breaking the news.
 A few of your closest friends, as well as each of your families, knew but that was it. It felt like it was only fair to tell Alexia since she had been the one to confirm Mapi’s feelings. Other than her, Patri and Pina were the only other ones on the team to know about your relationship. Before you had gotten better at sneaking around, they had walked in on you mid-makeout session on the middle of your couch. You had forgotten they were even coming over when you and Mapi had gotten a bit distracted. It’s safe to say, after that happened the pair of you were much more careful. Even though it wasn’t part of the plan, it was helpful having the three of them clued in. The group of five spent a fair amount of time together so not having to hide around them gave you a chance to relax. 
Typically, you and Mapi were good at sneaking around. Because of how close you had been prior to dating, nobody questioned most of the things you did. As long as you weren’t outwardly kissing or saying anything too cheesy, nobody thought much of it. The only time things became harder was when you were traveling as a team. When you traveled, unless you got roomed together, there was no solace of coming back together when training was over and getting to spend time with just the two of you. It was almost harder when you were around each other so much yet never in the way you wanted. 
~
You had been stuck on the bus far longer than you would've liked. Sometimes you were excited to join the other younger players, playing games and turning the bus ride into a social event. Today wasn't one of those days.  You weren’t sure where it was you were even going to be playing, you just knew you were exhausted and cranky. You took a seat by yourself in the front, not really interacting with anyone. Mapi was with the much louder group having fun in the back. She could tell you were tired and wanted to give you some space to sleep. She also knew you enough to know that if you were in a bad mood you were going to be clingy and she didn’t want to accidentally let everyone in on your secret. When there was a lull in conversation, Lucy questioned your girlfriend, giving her a suggestive look, “Mapi, where’s your partner in crime? We don’t usually see you two apart.” It was clear Lucy was teasing but also was genuinely curious as to why you weren’t hanging out with them. 
“She’s just taking a nap, probably trying to get away from you, idiota,” Mapi rolled her eyes, trying to cover up that she too was a bit concerned about you. It was unusual for you to isolate yourself. She sent you a quick text to check in with you but when she got no response, she decided she needed to come check on you herself. 
When the defender stood up, she knew more quips were coming her way. “Ooooh Mapi? Gotta go check on your girlfriend?” The way Mariona sing-songed this made it clear she was joking but Mapi still couldn’t help but panic. She awkwardly laughed and turned away from the other girls, hoping to hide her blush. Patri and Pina shared a quick look as they knew the comment from Mariona would leave their friend panicking. They did everything they could to hold in their giggling while Alexia glared at them, hoping to make them stop. Nobody else seemed to notice this as they went back to their karaoke and left Mapi alone to join you. 
You felt someone sit in the seat next to you, immediately recognizing the scent as your girlfriend. Your eyes were shut, trying to sleep, but failing. The side of her leg pressed up against yours and she gently placed her hand on your knee. It was clear to her that you weren’t asleep because of how much you were moving around, trying to get comfortable. “Hey,” she spoke gently, rubbing her thumb against your knee to get your attention. You slowly opened your eyes and Mapi greeted you with a soft smile. “You okay? You don’t seem like yourself.” she spoke softly, voice full of worry. 
You nodded, “yeah, just tired. I didn’t sleep very well last night so I was hoping to sleep on the bus.” You rubbed at your eyes, starting to accept that it wasn’t going to happen. 
“Here I’ll stay with you,” you couldn’t help but be grateful at the offer. 
Still, you tried to protest, “Maps, no. Go have fun with your friends, I know you like to keep busy on the bus. I’ll be okay.” 
The look on your girlfriend’s face made it clear she’d be staying by your side, “Hmm no thanks. We’ll put some headphones on, you can snuggle up against me, it’ll be great. It’ll put you to sleep in no time,” the way she spoke made it clear it was a statement, not a question. It’s not like you would complain, it did sound pretty great. She took your silence as agreement and pulled out her headphones, passing one to you. By the time you had put it in, she had put on a playlist that the two of you had made together. Her arm wrapped around you so you could place your head on her shoulder and use her as a pillow. You couldn’t believe how quickly you fell asleep. Mapi had that effect on you, always putting you at ease. 
At some point, your girlfriend had also drifted off. You woke up, still snuggled into her, with her head resting on top of yours, her one arm still around you, and her free hand interlocking yours. This was by far the most comfortable you’d ever been on the bus. You carefully grabbed your phone so as to not wake up Mapi. You had some texts in your group chat with you, Mapi, Alexia, Patri, and Pina. First was a picture from Patri taken from the back of the bus where you could see the tops of your heads lying against each other, you shared earphones hanging between you. It was followed by a text from Pina, “better be careful if you want everyone to keep thinking you’re ‘just friends’ ;) “. You smiled to yourself, knowing she was right, but being too happy right now to care. All you could do was close your eyes and drift back to sleep.
When you eventually got to your hotel and got off the bus, the two of you seemed to be the hot topic of discussion. Everyone was teasing you, first for Mapi giving up her precious social time for you, then for how closely the two of you had cuddled up, and finally for the way your hands remained interlocked as Mapi led you off the bus and into the hotel lobby. 
The only downside to Alexia knowing about your relationship was that she knew better than to let you two be roommates on trips like this. You were paired up with Bruna which you really couldn’t complain about, and Mapi got paired with Mariona. With neither of your roommates knowing about your relationship, finding time alone together was about to get much more difficult. 
~
At breakfast the next morning, you went to sit down next to your girlfriend. She stood up to greet you with a hug and a soft kiss on the top of your head. It was likely a bit too long of a hug to be considered friendly but somehow no one commented. Alexia just shook her head, smirking to herself at how obvious you were being. Sitting down at their table, you tried to leave space between you while you ate so as to not raise suspicion, but you should’ve known that it wouldn’t work. Mapi always had to have a hand on you in some way. It was usually subtle, but it sure didn’t make hiding things any easier. You appreciated it though. You liked how she could be talking to anyone and you still knew she was thinking of you. That’s what was happening now as she settled into conversation with Alexia. The silent communication between your touches was better than any words could express. 
Your next chance you got to be together wasn’t until after training, back at the hotel. Patri and Pina invited you both to come hang out in their room with them. That’s how you found yourself, laying against Mapi’s chest while she and Patri played FIFA. Her arms wrapped around you tightly while she held her controller in front of you. “Ay, (y/n), did you only come over so you could have time to be all cuddly without the rest of the team around?” Pina quipped at you while you both continued to watch the game, she was somehow both joking and also entirely serious. 
Before you could respond, your girlfriend spoke up for you, “hey just be happy this is all we’re doing. We could be making out right now if we wanted to.” She somehow managed to hold you tightly while still playing a close game with Patri. You giggled at how she kept moving under you the more involved in the game she got. “Amor sit still! You’re blocking the screen!” Mapi whined at you, only making you giggle more at how quickly her tone changed. You ended up moving further down to cuddle into her leg so that she could still see. She shot you a glance to make sure you knew she wasn’t actually annoyed with you but relaxed when she saw your soft smile. “Comfortable?” she chuckled lightly at how you burrowed into the side of her leg. 
“Did you really have to ask, amor?” you smiled at her before turning back to watch the game she was playing. 
All of the sudden you heard the sound of the door opening, making you jump. However when you saw Alexia’s blonde hair round the corner, you quickly relaxed again. “Ooh the lovebirds are here, are you guys just here so you can makeout?” She shot you a smile knowing that you two would always spare them from seeing you be too handsy.
You rolled your eyes playfully at your captain, “you guys always say that but we’ve really only made out in front of you once and it wasn’t even on purpose. And you weren’t even there, Ale!” You sat up a little more so you could see her face. 
“Gracias a Dios!” the blonde shot back at you, mirroring your smile. 
Deciding to have some fun with this while also taking advantage of this limited time to show affection, you decided to try something. “You know, Ale, if you wanted us to be like that, all you had to do was ask. We sure can…” As you said this, you moved back up in Mapi’s lap and started to slowly leave kisses along the side of her neck. You didn’t want to distract her too much from her game but you also knew how much she’d be enjoying it. Plus you loved a chance to annoy your friends. This time, it was Alexia who started the retching noises. You felt your girlfriend tilt her head to the side to give you more room to continue down her throat, clearly having fun with this. Pina quickly joined in the sound effects when she saw that you weren’t planning on stopping. Finally Patri wanted to know what was going on and took a quick look over at you. Of course she had no choice but to join her friends in their shouting. 
What you hadn’t planned on was that the whole scene had distracted Patri just enough to allow your girlfriend the opening she needed to win their game. “Yes!! I won!” You broke apart from her throat as she suddenly shouted. The two of you high fived and shared a real kiss in celebration of your unplanned teamwork. Everyone else in the room just groaned at the two of you, Patri flopping back onto her bed, cursing in Spanish in protest of her loss. You just settled back into Mapi, sharing a couple more short pecks as you did so. 
~
The next day was your match. When you did your morning walk as a team, nobody seemed to notice the way you and Mapi had linked pinky fingers as you went. You wanted to be close and to spend it with her but you knew that holding hands on your team walk would be too much. The pinkies worked perfectly because nobody else could see it past the long sleeves of your jackets. 
The match didn’t go as easily as everyone hoped it would. The score was tied 1-1. Barcelona had been winning most of the game but around minute 75, the other team equalized and both teams had been fighting hard for a winning goal ever since. Exhausted was an understatement. You and Mapi were both starters and were in the entire game. All that was on your mind was scoring. You had to. It was 2 minutes into injury time when Aitana made eye contact with you. She was running the ball up the field and you could tell exactly what her plan was as she did so. She slotted the ball through three defenders and directly to your feet. With one touch you sent the ball sailing past the keeper and into the back of the net. The crowd erupted and before you even had time to process, Mapi had run straight to you, beating everyone else as they all headed your way. Immediately Mapi scooped you into her arms, picking you up as she hugged you in celebration. You knew your other teammates had also surrounded you, but to you, it felt like just you and your girlfriend, alone in the middle of the pitch. She continued to hold you up, kissing your cheeks repeatedly. Your other teammates almost got bored of trying to celebrate you because of how much Mapi was keeping you to herself as the game wrapped up. You all made your way around the pitch to thank the fans, while your girl kept you at arms reach, overwhelmed with pride for you. 
The two of you were the last ones to enter the changing room, walking hand in hand pulled into her side. Lucy noticed this immediately and couldn’t help but comment, “Jesus, Mapi are you ever gonna share her with us?” You could already see your girlfriend starting to blush as you made eye contact. “Do we get to celebrate with her at all tonight or is she all yours?” The rest of the room laughed and added their own comments but you and Mapi were lost in each other’s stare, having a silent conversation among yourselves. 
You gave her hand a tight squeeze, encouraging her to do what you knew you were both thinking. “Alright you caught us,” the defendender sighed, “we’ve been dating for almost eight months now.” You held up your joined hands as if it were proof to show everyone (not that anyone needed it at this point). The room immediately interrupted into cheers. Of course it did, everyone knew how perfect you were for each other. If you had been best friends almost your entire lives, of course you’d make a great couple too. You and Mapi just smiled at each other, giving her hand another squeeze, trying to communicate that this was the right move. You didn’t even notice everyone around you until you were tackled into a group hug with you two at the center of it. It was exactly where you wanted to be- holding onto your girlfriend tight while all your best friends piled in around you, celebrating your love. It was everything you could ever imagine. Mapi was everything you could ever imagine.
The rest of the love language series:
Perfect. A.Bonmati x reader. Quality time.
Let me spoil you. C.Coll x reader. Giving and receiving gifts.
Broken. P.Guijarro. Acts of service.
You know I love you. A.Putellas. Words of Affirmation
Masterlist
Feedback and requests are always welcome! :)
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imbored1201 · 4 months
Text
How do we put up with you?
Barcelona Femeni x Teen Reader
Words: 1,936
A/N: there’s a lot of Mapi and reader beef in this one😭
You hated traveling but also loved it. It was a perfect opportunity to do dumb things and easily get away with it since everyone was too tired to care. The bad thing about it was you had to sit down and be patient. 
The whole time in the airport, Alexia would hold your hand, or Sandra, since you liked how soft her hands were. 
"Restroom," Alexia told you as she reached to grab your hand. "I don't have to go," you told her, only paying attention to your phone. "Hey!" You said as she snatched it from you. "You always say you don't have to, then when I come back you complain that you do, come on," you glared at her as you stood up and took her hand. 
"Aw, the baby needs her mommy to take her to the potty," Salma cooed as she pinched your cheek. You swatted her hand away. "Leave her alone," Alexia told her, which Salma was quick to oblige.
—————
Once Alexia went into one of the stalls, you were quick to rush out. You went to a gift shop that was nearby to look at what they had. 
After a couple of minutes, you noticed Alexia rushing out the restroom and in the direction of the team. You smirked, shaking your head, and continued to look stuffed animals. 
"You really want to give her a heart attack, don't you?" You jumped at the sound of Ingrid's voice. You turned around and smiled at Fridolina and Ingrid. "Look at this puppy," you held out the puppy that Frido took. 
"Grab a candy and let's go," Ingrid told you, and you were quick to grab your favorite candy and gave it to Frido.
Ingrid held your hand as you walked back. You smirked at seeing Alexia go off on Patri and Pina.
"I think you lost someone," Frido announced, making everyone turn to her. "You see, we told you we didn't know," Pina told her, glaring at you. As usual, Alexia suspected that they had a part in your disappearance and got scolded for no reason. 
Alexia quickly swept you up in a hug. "You know you can't do that, idiota," she scolded, smacking the back of your head. "Look at my new stuffed animal." You held it up for everyone to see. 
Pina snatched it away and examined it. "Can I name it?" She genuinely asked. You thought about it for a second. "Not your child, not your choice." Claudia scoffed and went to get her own stuffed animal to name. 
————
You were bored and energetic; the candy Fridolina got you gave you an extra boost. Alexia sighed as you saw you eating it, too tired to even take it away from you. She wanted you to be tired so you would sleep the whole plane ride.
"Come on, we have to board," Alexia said, grabbing your hand. Marta took your suitcase, and you happily made your way onto the plane. 
"Can I sit with Ingrid and Mapi?" You asked her, looking at the couple. Mapi groaned upon hearing you, making Ingrid smack her in the back of the head. 
"Okay, here's your bag; it has your juice, iPad, and snacks." Alexia spoke a little too excited, it was understandable; she needed a break from your nonsense. "Move, I want middle," you told Mapi, who shook her head. 
"Mapi move," Ingrid now said. Mapi gave her a look of disbelief. "Mapi, don't start arguing with a kid." Mapi sighed and got up. You smiled and sat in between them. Lucy looked back at you and gave you a warning look when you kicked her seat again before the plane even took off. It was going to be a long flight. 
————
You were bored again after 10 minutes. After kicking Lucy's seat none stop you finally got scolded by Mapi, and she threatened to tell Alexia. 
Speaking of, Mapi kept staring Ingrid down when she thought you were distracted by your iPad. It was disgusting, in your opinion. She was practically drooling all over her shirt. 
"Can you stop eye-fucking her" you told her when Ingrid went to use the restroom. Mapi looked at you, shocked, not believing those words had just came out of your mouth. 
You smirked at her. "I'm telling Alexia" she announced, standing up to call Alexia to make you sit with her. 
"You do that; I'll tell her it was you that broke her favorite vase, not me. All because a teenager was kicking your ass in a game," you knew you got her there when she went silent. 
You were beating Mapi in FIFA, and it was worse since she was trying to impress Ingrid, who was watching the whole time. You were teasing her, and she decided it was a good idea to throw Nala's toy ball at the wall; it hit the vase instead. You had never seen Mapi so scared.  
You took the blame since you knew it would be good blackmail later on. 
Mapi kept glancing at you and back to her phone, not even looking at Ingrid's direction anymore, even when the green eyed girl asked her something, she counted down the minutes until the plane landed. She needed a break from any kind of children. 
You had another trick up your sleeve, though. You knew with Mapi's looks that things would most likely heat up tonight in their hotel room. 
You turned to Ingrid and tapped her shoulder. "Can me, you, and Frido have a sleepover? Like last time. Alexia can never sleep on the first night, and it annoys me." Mapi turned to you, wondering if she heard you correctly. 
"I don't think that's a good idea," she said. "Why not? I'm fine with it; I've missed her late-night thoughts." Ingrid shrugged, and you stuck your tongue out at Mapi, who muttered curse words under her breath.
"Watch your language," you scolded her, immediately cuddling into Ingrid's side. All she could do was stare you down, despite the growing temptation to strangle you.
————
Thankfully for Mapi, she got a 30-minute break after landing and getting to the hotel. During those 30 minutes, you had to somehow convince Alexia to let you have a sleepover with Ingrid and Fridolina, then explain to her that Mapi was staying with her. It wasn't going to be easy. 
"Did you take my sweater again?" Alexia asked you as she stepped out of the restroom from her shower. When she saw you, she frowned. You had your little backpack ready to go. "Where are you going? It's 9, your bedtime is at 10."
"Me, Ingrid, and Frido are having a girls night," you told her happily. "You're barely telling me this?" She sounded a bit angry, but mostly confused. 
"Ingrid said it was fine, and you're stuck with Mapi for tonight," Alexia huffed at that. Those two together didn't make a good combo when it came to sleeping in the same room. 
Alexia sometimes had a hard time falling asleep in a new environment, so she was constantly getting up. Mapi couldn't sleep if she heard any kind of noise, so she would get annoyed by any movement. 
————
"You have a toothbrush?" You nodded. "Charger?" You nodded. "Extra clothes?" You nodded. Before she could question you more, you walked out the door. 
"Bye Lex!" You called out, running to the elevator. Ingrid and Mapi's room was on the floor below. You didn't even have to knock on the door since an angry-looking Mapi came out with a bag of clothes and her blankets.
"Bye bye," you smirked at her, going past her and pushing her outside. "Eres un-" Before she could finish, you slammed the door in her face. 
You ran to Ingrid and jumped on her bed. "Can we please ding dong ditch some of the girls" Ingrid shook her head, making you whine. 
"Behave tonight, or I'll send you back to Alexia's." You nodded and jumped up, hearing another knock on the door. 
"Frido!" You exclaimed, jumping on her, when you opened the door. She carried you back inside and threw you on the bed. 
"Want to do a job, kid?" Frido asked you, and you quickly nodded. "Go get us some ice; you know where it's at?" 
"Frido, it's too late for her to be going out." "She'll be fine; she has too much energy; she needs to do some exercise to get rid of it, so why don't you sprint while doing this, I'll time you." You loved competitions. 
————
"Go!" Frido yelled, holding the door open for you as you sprinted out of the room and down to the elevator. 
You went to the floor below, where the ice was, and sprinted out of the elevator. 
While you filled your bucket, you got an idea. You could fulfill your ding-dong ditching plan. As always, Patri was your target. 
You knew Patri and Ona got put together because last time Patri and Pina shared a room, Pina broke the TV trying to throw a football at you for being annoying. You admit, you were being annoying, but throwing a ball at you while you were standing in front of the TV was a bad idea on her part. 
————
You quickly banged on there and ran away to the elevator again. After a couple of seconds, you heard the door opening. "Hello?" Patri asked, you couldn't contain your laughter. 
"Y/N, I swear," she said, knowing your laugh. She sighed and went back inside, refusing to give you attention. Not enjoying that fact, you decided to do it again. 
It was a terrible idea; Patri was waiting for you. She quickly swung the door open and tackled you. 
"Alexia!" You yelled, knowing she was probably up and doing her nighttime routine. Patri continued her attack and started tickling your sides. "Helppp!" You yelled, giggling. 
Ona came out of the room confused, rubbing her eyes tiredly and watching Patri attack you while you giggled and yelled for Alexia. 
————
When Alexia stepped out, the waterworks came. "Mierda," Patri muttered, seeing the tears in your eyes. 
"What is going on?!" Alexia shouted. It was late; practically the whole team on the bottom floor was up and out of their rooms now. They were all pretty cranky over the fact that they were woken up.
"I just wanted ice," you cried, pointing to your bucket of ice that was on the ground. Alexia looked at Patri with a questioning look. 
"She's a demon! She ding dong ditched us," Patri defended herself. Irene let out an annoyed sigh and told everyone to go back into their rooms. 
"Ona?" You turned to Ona, who was just as confused as her. "I didn't hear anything," she shrugged and went back into the room to sleep. Patri had a look of disbelief, finally getting off of you. 
"But-" "That's enough, Patri; apologize and give her a new bucket of ice, and you," she turned to you. Mapi quickly stuck her head out the door to watch you get your scolding next. 
"Bed, it's way past your bedtime," you rolled your eyes. "I'm practically an adult." "Don't act like it," you glared at Mapi. “Okay, I’ll go to bed, cuddle with Ingrid, and have her read me a bedtime story, something you can’t do.” Before Mapi could say something back, Alexia dragged her back into the room and slammed the door. 
————
Patri shoved your new bucket of ice into your hands and stormed off. "Goodnight," you called out; all you got was a middle finger. 
"Alexia!" 
691 notes · View notes
wileys-russo · 6 months
Text
off limits (5) II a.putellas x león!reader
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part one part two part three part four
off limits (5) II a.putellas x león!reader
"-so ale just, left?" alba clarified and you nodded. "i mean i thought i knew my sister but it is not like her to run away from a problem." alba winced and you hummed, twirling around the straw in your empty glass.
"i'm sorry amiga. i really did not know that is what happened, i assumed you both had a fight or she just said something stupid. alexia can be so stubborn sometimes but she is not one to just give up." alba sighed, moving her arm around your shoulders.
"thats what i thought too, but she has made it clear now that it meant more to me than it did to her." you shrugged, sighing deeply. "look amiga i don't mean to dismiss your feelings at all and please if i am overstepping, tell me." alba started as you looked at her curiously but nodded for her to continue.
"the way she looked at you as you were leaving, the way i watched her breakdown in that bathroom was unlike i have seen her before. my sister is someone to wear her heart on her sleeve around those she trusts, she is incredibly passionate and loving but she is not one to show weakness to many." alba started, your head falling to her shoulder as you hummed for her to continue.
"ale has never brought a partner home, never been public about a relationship, never spoke very much about anyone she's seen, she is a very private person chica even with me. but i promise you that she cares about you, i know her well enough to see that. but i think she is afraid of how much, so when something threatened that she thought it would be easier to pretend not to care, to protect herself and to protect you." alba continued as you frowned a little at her words.
"how is leaving me when i needed her, protecting me?" you argued, pulling your head back up and turning your body. "you and mapi have always been very very close, like alexia and i si?" you nodded in agreeance.
"we were, but i cannot look at her the same way since everything happened. i blame both of them for how things turned out, in different ways." you admitted, alba nodding that she understood.
"well if alexia did not like a partner i had, i would listen to her about why. because i know she cares about me and she wants me to be happy, so if i was happy and she still did not like my partner, i would want to know why." alba started, holding up a hand as you opened your mouth to interrupt.
"which i know is not the same situation and not to defend alexia because i could slap her for how she has handled this mi amiga. but maybe she did not want to be the cause of any issues with you and mapi, because she knows how special that bond is with your hermana'." alba suggested as you sighed deeply, taking a moment to collect your thoughts.
"then why would she not tell me that so we could have talked about it and worked through it? she just left alba, she left me like i was nothing and nobody to her. and that hurt! she does not understand how much that hurt." you whispered, facade breaking for a moment as you angrily wiped away a loose tear.
"okay hey hey carino we don't have to talk about it anymore. i'm sorry if i overstepped." alba pulled you into a tight hug as you sighed deeply into her shoulder.
"but you know...i would have loved to have you as my sister if you and ale got married." "alba!" "sorry! just trying to lighten the mood amiga."
"are you coming to malta next week then?" alba pulled away, finishing the last mouthful of her drink and nodding for the two of you to leave.
with international break coming and spain not having any fixtures it meant you all had a few days off, so a few of the barcelona girls and their partners had organised to go to malta as a getaway from everything.
"no." you shook your head firmly, having been invited but you knew through the team that alexia was also going. "wrong. you are coming! and you can hang out with me." alba grinned, pinching your cheek as the two of you walked toward her car.
"why are you going? do you have a secret girlfriend on the team you are not telling me about?" you teased her, not missing the way her face changed for just a fleeting moment. "you do! tell me." you demanded, smacking her shoulder.
"i don't, i promise ale invited me and that's it. but there is something you should probably know." alba started, unlocking her car as the two of you slid inside and you gestured eagerly for her to continue. "so when mapi first joined barca and she and alexia started getting very close-" alba started, car engine roaring to life.
"-me and your sister..." alba trailed off giving you a look as your jaw dropped. "you slept with maria?!" you gasped, albas eyes widening.
"mierda no! we went on a few dates, kissed a few times then decided we were better off as friends and that was that, nothing else ever happened." alba dismissed quickly, pulling out of the parking lot as you shook your head in disbelief.
"does alexia know?" "who do you think encouraged it?"
"oh i wish you had not told me that albs. that is so weird!" you groaned, struggling to wrap your head around it. "why is it weird! its not like anything happened, and her and ingrid are the most well suited couple to each other i have ever seen, soul mates." alba shook her head, speeding down the freeway.
"because she's my sister and you're-well you!" you huffed, cringing at the thought. "hey! there is a line of hot women waiting to get a chance with alba putellas thank you." the older girl hit you with her free hand.
"you know chica in another universe you and i..." she trailed off at a red light sending you a wink as you grimaced in mock disgust.
"hey i know you have a thing for putellas women, why not the younger better looking model amiga?" she wiggled her eyebrows suggestively with a toothy grin as you shoved her, both of you knowing it was all light hearted.
if anything you viewed alba as a sister of sorts in the same way you did ingrid, she was always around long before you and alexia got together and given you were barely a year apart in age you'd always been close.
"well i didn't think you had something for the león women alba but here we are." "i am swearing you to secrecy with that nobody else knows about it, you take it to the grave or i put you in an early one!"
~
alexia glanced up with a frown at the insistent buzzing from the security box by her door. quickly standing to make her way over there she rolled her eyes seeing her sister waiting downstairs on the small camera screen, buzzing her apartment number again and again.
she shouldn't have been surprised given that she knew alba had spent the afternoon with you, but still she was slightly taken aback by the way the younger girl forcefully shouldered past her the moment alexia opened the front door to let her in.
"so she told you."
"of course she told me alexia! you-" alba struggled to get her words out as her older sister sat back down on the sofa, nala curling up into her side. "explain, now." was all the girl could get out, pointing at her firmly.
"explain what?" "why you left her alexia." "alba-" "don't alba me. first you hide the relationship from me, then you are dishonest about why you broke up and then accuse me of trying to flirt with her at lunch! explain alexia."
the older putellas sighed, gently moving nala off of her as the small ball of fur curled up in her own bed on the floor, alexia running her hands down her face as she leant forward on her knees and alba took a seat.
"i don't know why. in the moment-in the moment i just heard the way mapi was speaking, the anger and the betrayal in her voice. selfishly my first thought was the team, if mapi was angry at both of us it would affect our overall chemistry on the pitch." alexia started, alba scoffing quietly at her words but remaining otherwise silent.
"so then i panicked and i just....i shut down. i didn't know how to process what i was feeling so i didn't know how to comfort her through what she was feeling. i knew i should have just held her, or hugged her but i was terrified that if i did then mapi would never speak to either of us again, and i couldn't be the cause of that." alexia continued, closing her eyes as guilt again flooded her body in waves.
"then that next morning all i wanted to do was go and see her, to apologise and check on her and try to talk. but i couldn't get the image out of my head of mapi screaming in her face, i have seen them fight before but never ever like that. or the way her voice broke as she begged me not to leave alba. she begged me and i did not even turn around!" alexia whispered, pinching the bridge of her nose and hanging her head in her hands.
"mapi did not deserve a best friend who lied to her, so i iced her out. and she did not deserve a girlfriend who does not stand up for her, does not protect her, who walked away like a coward and did not own up to her mistakes." alexia finished, glancing to look at her younger sister whose features were curled into a frown, though alexia was unable to decipher what she was thinking.
"so you just...left it. did not apologise, did not try to explain yourself. do you know how much she is hurting ale? how confused she is? she thinks you do not care for her, and that you never did." alba spoke quietly and firmly, though not unkindly seeing how much the older girl was clearly struggling.
"of course i care about her!" "well how is she to know that hermana? have you told her?" "no." "exactly. then imagine how much more confused she is when suddenly you try to play hero at the club the other night as if you cared for her after icing her out, after leaving her without an explanation, ignoring what happened and not making any attempts to fix it. you do not get to treat her like that alexia and then be confused as to why she did not allow you to take her home and be her saviour, that is cruel."
"i know." alexia muttered, having spent the time since doing nothing but reflecting on all the things she wished she'd done differently, and plaguing herself deeper and deeper into a self inflicted pity party that the cage she was in was one of her own creation.
"good. because she is coming to malta and you are going to fix things before we go!" alba announced, alexias head shooting up and her eyebrows furrowing. "since when?" alexia questioned, having checked in multiple times with her team mates and friends about the guest list for this little getaway.
"since i told her i would be kicking her door in and kidnapping her if she was not ready when i pick her up to go to the airport." "mierda alba! you had no right to get involved!" "you have no right to be upset if she chooses to go away with her team and her friends, and you are going too. so you have six days to start fixing things with her if you do not want to lose her for good hermana."
~
your plan to avoid alexia was going well, as cruel as it sounded her knee had been giving her some trouble which meant she wasn't training with the group, rather focusing on media duties, physio visits and individual sessions.
there was only one more game until international break and alexia already knew she was not going to be on the roster. she had done her best to make peace with it, as much as it terrified her anytime something felt a little off.
so you continued to avoid any and all interaction with the captain, and in turn you'd also been avoiding your sister, still struggling with how to forgive her after the domino effect of her actions.
but with ingrid in her ear about giving you the space you clearly needed she was doing her best to try and respect that, but it killed her to shoot you a smile across the locker room and see you have to force one back before you'd hurry away.
back when things were normal you'd eat at her house at least twice a week, come over when you were bored, spend weekends curled up on her sofa with bagheera. it used to annoy her sometimes the way you would just show up, sometimes even letting yourself in and eating the food from her fridge like you lived there.
she'd scold you and scowl at you asking if you had suddenly moved in, and you'd simply grin at her like annoying younger siblings do, wandering off to watch a movie on her tv which was bigger than yours, flicking through her extensive novel collection or stealing clothes from her closet when she wasn't looking.
they were right when they say you don't know what you miss until its gone, and mapi would sometimes find herself staring at her front door wishing you would barge in uninvited again.
when you would come to her for advice or just to rant angrily about something that had riled you up that day, even something as simple as your neighbors taking your parking spot meaning you had to park a three minute walk away from your building.
despite your sisterly arguments the two of you had always been close, always told one another everything, especially as you grew up and matured and followed in her footsteps.
some would have been frustrated at their younger sister seemingly copying their every move, but mapi could not bring herself to feel anything but pride when she watched you play and progress through the years, adoring the thought that she had played a heavy hand in your love of football.
but the one thing you'd kept from her, was the one thing that had ruined everything, and mapi truly had no one to blame but herself. she wanted her baby sister back, but as ingrid had explained she needed to let you come to her now, and that the tighter she held on the more you would just pull away.
things shifted one afternoon when you were returning from a meeting with jonatan after your last training session for the week, assuming most of the team and staff had left for the day given it was nearing the early evening.
you were exhausted both physically and mentally, everything had begun to take a toll on you and you were noticing it finally start to affect your football, something you'd tried hard as you could to avoid happening since all of this started in the first place.
but it appeared you weren't the only one who was feeling the effects of everything. your eyes flickered to the right as you passed one of the physios offices, noticing a body sat on the benches which of course you recognized right away.
you paused for just a fleeting moment, and all it took was that milisecond for her eyes to meet yours, red and puffy a clear indicator she'd been crying. uncomfortable with the sudden invasive vulnerability you'd hurried away, though felt something pulling you back as you stopped after a few steps.
your body fell into turmoil and you froze on the spot, head sent into a dizzying back and forth argument about how you should continue. eventually the little voice in the back of your head won out, and ignoring the thoughts creeping in about how bad of an idea this was.
"hola capi." you greeted her quietly, knocking on the door gently as again she looked up, even more startled than before that you'd returned and directly addressed her. "hola." she forced a small smile back as you lingered in the doorway.
"estás bien?" you checked in with a slight raise of your eyebrow, nodding to the ice pack strapped to her knee. "fine, gracias." she spoke through tight lips with a curt nod of your head, taken aback by how this was the most the two of you had spoke in days.
"no you're not alexia." you remanded softly, moving into the room and pulling yourself up to sit on the bench opposite her. a thick silence brewed between the pair of you, the tension almost suffocating as you sat together unmoving.
"i have to go get some scans on my knee tomorrow, maybe an mri. they are worried something has potentially torn, we are hoping for the best and it is just a minor setback and needs some rest, but preparing for the worst just in case." alexia confessed, eyes dropping back down to the floor as you winced at her words.
"you do not need to say anything please, i just needed to tell someone." alexia was quick to clarify before you could speak, unsure what you would have even said as you nodded wordlessly respecting her wishes, the thick silence again growing between the two of you as you contemplated how to leave after her confession.
"for two minutes, can you please pretend you do not hate me?" alexia finally broke, glancing up at you through hooded eyes, hazel orbs shining even more prominently through the thin sheen of tears she'd swallowed back.
"i don't hate you alexia." you forced out after a moment. "i would not blame you. i have been selfish, a coward, treated you worse than you would ever deserve. i would not blame you for hating me, i would hate me." alexia spoke up, glancing toward you as your brows furrowed and you stared at your hands in your lap, thinking of your next words carefully.
"alexia of course i do not hate you. I miss nothing more than just laying with you in silence with just you being there, being with me.” you confessed, voice barely above a whisper as alexia's knuckles turned white from how hard she gripped the edge of the bench she was sat on.
"you miss me?" was all the catalan could manage out, and you felt her eyes bore into you from across the room. "what? of course i miss you alexia. i never even got a chance to speak to you about any of it we just...broke up and i never even got a say in that, it just happened." you managed to get out, emotions starting to bubble over as the control you had over them started to slip away.
"and now all of a sudden I have thousands of pictures of you in my phone that I cannot bring myself to delete, months worth of memories shared with you that i cannot shake from my head. my finger hovers over your contact sometimes just wanting to hear your voice and i think constantly about what you're doing. wondering if you miss me, if you regret what happened and how different things might be if you didn't leave." the control slipped away completely as you started to get off your chest the insecurities that had eaten away at you for weeks now.
"if you called i would have picked up." alexia forced out, eyes locking with yours and her stomach churning at the obvious pain leaking from them as you spoke.
"would you? because the worst part about all of this is that i can't stop overthinking about why you left me and why you never even explained yourself or even tried to apologised. so of course I’m not going to call you and tell you I still love you and I miss-"
"you still love me?" alexia's eyes widened as yours squeezed shut, heart clenching. "i do. but i know now that you don't because if you loved me you wouldn’t have left me like that. you wouldn’t have waited weeks to finally grow a spine and apologise which you still haven't done! you wouldn’t have made up with my sister before making any sort of effort with me knowing that it’s partly her fault we even broke up in the first place!" your temper flared now, jumping down from the bench with your fists balled by your side.
"mi amor please i can't even begin to-" she regretted the word the moment it left her mouth, watching your face fall and your heart shatter all over again causing her stomach to heave.
"don't call me that. please!" your voice cracked and you paused, collecting yourself as alexia fell silent again, face burning red at her mistake.
"the only thing i hate alexia is that I can’t hate you. I can’t get you out of my mind and I can’t escape you even when i'm alone in a room miles away from you. you’re always there with me in the back of my head, or there’s a photo of you on my fridge or on the wall, or there’s a magnet or a keyring or some sort of trinket you bought me that I cannot find the motivation to get rid of but every time I look at them and think of you it just breaks me all over again!" your fist thumped down on the padded material of the medical bench in frustration.
"i am so so sorry, i've wanted to say it but i do not know how to say how sorry i am, for how much i've hurt you and how unfair it was for me to leave you." alexia forced out, arms shaking lightly from the strength in which she squeezed the bench in her hands, a miracle it hadn't broken at her desperate grip.
at her hurried apology a suffocating silence brewed once more, wrapping its hands around your throat as the anger suddenly melted from your body and you could have crumpled to the floor. instead you pulled yourself to once again sit on the medical bench across from your ex lover.
"i never thought that you were capable of hurting me like this alexia. not the girl who held me for days as i sobbed when i withdrew from the national team and would no longer play for my country because of him. who wrote me dozens of love letters and organised for flowers to arrive at my door every week she was away on international duty." you paused for a second to swallow the lump which was building up in your throat as you forced back the hot tears which threatened to fall at any second.
it was so quiet you could have heard a pin drop.
"the girl who I thought was just as much in love with me as I am with her." you broke at that sentence, unable to hold back the dry sob which ripped from your throat, your eyes falling to the floor unable to hold hers anymore.
"the same girl who left me when I needed her. who wouldn’t even hug me or look me in the eyes as I sobbed and begged like an idiota for her to change her mind." your chest heaved with silent cries as you struggled to catch your breath.
"no, alexia don't!" you tried to push her away, not having heard her even get up off the chair as she slotted between your legs and gently cradled your face in her hands.
"please if i could go back and undo it i would but i cannot and i don't know how to apologize enough for that, i cannot ever say i am sorry and sorry will never ever be enough. but i am still that same girl hermosa." you flinched at the term of enderament but alexia had already gone too far to stop.
"i know to have the seat heater on when i pick you up for an early training, i know to always have a spare jacket in my car because you always forget one, i know to order extra food when you say you are not hungry because i know you are. i am still that same girl and i am still so in love with you. but flowers and words will never be enough to fix this, how can i fix this mi amor? please!" the older girl begged, pressing her forehead to yours as you gave up trying to push her away, body wracking with sobs as hot tears carved their way down her own rosy cheeks.
"i am so tired alexia. i am so tired of hurting and wondering and overthinking. i am so tired of walking on eggshells and being angry and upset, it is so draining and i am exhausted." you whispered out, throat raw and aching as your chest heaved and you tried desperately to steady your breathing.
"but i don't know how to fix this ale. i don't know how to go back and pretend like it never happened because it did. i cannot risk hurting myself all over again if i let you back in, i am so sorry ale but i do not trust you anymore, not with my heart or with me." your own hands gently clasped her cheeks, using your thumbs to wipe away the tears which pooled in the corner of her eyes.
once you had you moved to grab her wrists, gently wrenching her hands from your face as they hung limply by her sides, her body sagging in defeat at your words and you ignored the way your mind was screaming at you to take them back and to reach out to comfort her.
"i am exhausted of avoiding you and being angry at you, it is killing me and clearly you have other things you need to be focusing yourself on." you forced out, nodding to her knee as she rested her body against the bench.
"we will never be as we were alexia, and i think we both need some time to make peace with that." you started, knowing that your next words were going to deliver a fatal and final blow.
"my contract is up this year with barca ale, and i will not be renewing it."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
part six
um....i'm sorry? this is not the end though besties do not fret, things aren’t always as they seem, or maybe they are who knows (I do since I’ve half written the next chapter already) xx
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alexias-putellas · 1 month
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red card // o.batlle x reader x barça femení
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o.batlle x reader x barça femení
slightly inspired by the ref in that one city vs chelsea game iykyk also in this a red card doesn’t automatically mean a match suspension bc i said so
warnings: swearing, description of injuries but nothing graphic, mentions of past bullying
-
when you played for man united, your absolute favourite games to play were the manchester derbys. the atmosphere, the fans, everything about them was euphoric and you thrived on the jeers of the rival fans.
so when you transferred to barcelona, you were delighted to find out that el clàsico matches made you feel the same way.
the only thing you didn’t like about it was olga carmona. the defender never left you alone, granted that was her job, but god she pissed you off.
and this el clàsico was no different.
from the moment the ref blew the whistle to start the game, olga was on you like a rash. she was grabbing at your shirt, pushing at you during set pieces, and somehow getting away with tackling you every two minutes.
you were famously known for being quick-tempered and acting impulsively on the pitch, more often than not ending up being booked.
since you and ona had been dating since you both played for man united, she could easily spot the rising anger in you from across the pitch and after another particularly rough tackle, she raced over and tugged you away from the madrid player before you could do anything.
“breathe.” ona whispered to you, patting your waist before gently pushing you in the direction you needed to go.
alexia, mapi, and frido, all three of them like older sisters to you, could only watch from the sidelines as all of them were injured. glances were shared everytime you were poked and prodded by a real madrid player.
“she is losing it.” mapi muttered to no one in particular, her good knee bouncing as she watched it become ingrid’s turn drag you away from olga before you could do anything.
you used your growing anger to your advantage channelled it in your strikes and barcelona were 3-0 up at halftime courtesy of you. but you were not happy.
the lockeroom didn’t seem like the best place for you to be so instead, you turned a corner and leaned against a wall, resting your hands on your knees and breathing deeply. being targeted during games wasn’t new to you, it was something you often prepared yourself for but you had a bad feeling about this game in particular. something was going to happen.
“hey,” you heard alexia say and looked up at her. “are you okay?”
you motioned to your grass-stained body and flustered appearance. “what the hell do you think?”
almost immediately, an apology flew from your mouth. alexia didn’t tolerate disrespect. she wouldn’t give you a pass because you were pissed off and you knew that. you closed your eyes and waited for her to scold you. but it never came.
instead, she placed her hand on your shoulder and squeezed. “you are doing a good job, cariño.”
you gave her a weak smile in return because it didn’t feel like it. being pulled away by your teammates was only reason you hadn’t retaliated on the pitch. if ingrid had gotten to you a few seconds later, you’re certain you would’ve laid into olga.
you walked off then without another word, finally joining the rest of the team but sitting quietly in your cubby until it was time to head back out for the second half.
it didn’t take long for you to completely lose it.
you had been running down the wing, fully intending to curl the ball over to caro, when olga crashed into you, her elbow hitting your cheek harshly before she swiped your ankles from under you, hitting the floor herself.
“what the fuck is wrong with you?!” you shouted, ignoring the way your face throbbed and shoving her back down when she tried to stand up. “just leave me alone for fucks sake!”
you could hear the roar of the real madrid players and supporters and then your own teammates pleading, begging. you turned to be met with the referee and then a red card.
you had been carded. you. the first card of the game had been given to you and it was a straight red. at that point you were certain that the ref had some sort of vendetta against you.
tears burned in your eyes. ona quickly wrapped her arm around your shoulders but you shrugged her off. you had never been booked with a straight red before so you were utterly devastated.
keira and aitana were still pleading with the referee, explaining that you’d been targeted the entire game and that it wasn’t fair for you to be punished for something everyone else had gotten away with.
the decision wasn’t reversed but even if it was, you wouldn’t have been on the pitch to see it, storming to the back fairly quickly. you didn’t look back at ona and you most certainly didn’t look up, not wanting to see those particular three faces staring at you in disappointment.
before the match you had promised them that you wouldn’t do anything stupid, that you wouldn’t let any of the real madrid players, especially olga, get under your skin. but you allowed it to happen. they pushed and pushed until you shoved.
you had ruined el clàsico and let your teammates down in quick succession so it was safe to say that you were feeling terrible.
as soon as you reached the lockeroom, you were in the shower, letting the warm water wash over your body. when you were done, you made your way over to ona’s cubby and dug through her bag for the spare hoodie she always packed in case you wanted it.
slipping it on, you dropped to the bench and used your phone to keep up with the game. upon noticing there was only a few minutes left, you swiped ona’s car keys and headed out of the stadium, not fancying facing any of the girls or the fans.
you waited patiently in the passengers side, silently handing the keys to ona when she finally joined you.
“estás bien?” the spaniard asked quietly and you nodded, staring out of the window.
“fine.”
ona knew you weren’t fine but she also knew that pushing you any more was a terrible idea. so she settled for taking your hand and when you didn’t immediately push her away, she knew she was doing something right by you.
you had a habit of completely shutting down when you were upset. so much so that even ona couldn’t through to you sometimes.
she was hoping that this wouldn’t be one of those times.
the drive to ona’s apartment was quiet. even when you got inside, you didn’t say a word, just dropped onto the sofa with a heavy sigh.
when your girlfriend approached, you mistook her look of concern as one of annoyance and as she reached out to touch your cheek, you inadvertently flinched back.
“amor,” ona whispered. “i would never hurt you.”
“i know. i know, oni, i know,” your eyes were wide, horrified that the look on ona’s face had been put there by you. you quickly grabbed her hand and placed it on your cheek, ignoring the throbbing that followed. “i know you wouldn’t, i’m sorry. i’m so sorry.”
your murmured apologies were quickly replaced by sobs and ona wrapped her arms around you, pulling you into her chest.
her grip didn’t relent until you were letting out shaky, uneasy breaths but even then she was reluctant to let you sit up. you noticed that her eyes were trained on your cheek and instinctively reached up to touch it.
“is it bad?” you asked quietly, feeling the swell under your fingers.
“no,” ona shook her head. “but i think it will bruise.”
“oh, great,” you muttered. “just what i need. a semi-permanent reminder of an awful game to haunt me for weeks.”
as you pushed yourself up, you hoped that ona wouldn’t see the way you winced but of course, she did.
“you are hurt,” she frowned. “where?”
“everywhere,” you whispered. “i don’t think my face is the only thing that’s bruised either.”
you leaned over and pulled your socks down to reveal your ankles, both painted exactly like you expected. more bruises were flickered across your thighs and even more on your upper body.
“i look like i went five rounds with mike tyson, not played a game of bloody football.” you huffed.
“they are just bruises, mi amor, they will fade.”
the outside bruises might fade but you weren’t sure that the ones you had on the inside would. the red card would follow you forever, you were certain of it.
there was no doubt in your mind that your actions had gone viral, solidifying people’s opinions of you. being described as a violent thug had never really bothered you before but it suddenly left a bad taste in your mouth, paired with what you did, were they really wrong? you decided it was probably best to stay away from the internet for a bit.
the thoughts left you unconsciously leaning back into ona, not realising she’d wrapped her arms around you again until there was a kiss planted on the side of your neck and you were brought back to earth.
“do you think ale will bench me?” you asked, running your nails along her arms as you blinked back tears.
“no, i don’t think she will.”
“…what if i asked her to?”
silence followed and you swallowed thickly. ona’s fingers ran gently through your hair as she pondered your question. “is that what you want?”
you sighed shakily. “it’s what i deserve and i think ale would agree with me.”
ᡣ𐭩
alexia did not agree with you. the only reason she said yes was because of the look of desperation on your face.
it was the first day back at training after el clàsico and you had arrived a little earlier than normal with ona so you could speak to your captain before anyone else got there. you knew that if any of the other girls overheard, they’d persuade you both to change your minds.
but you didn’t speak to alexia again, instead avoiding her like the plague. same with mapi and frido. ingrid was also on the list due to her association with the latter two.
since it was an early morning training, you were to have breakfast there. you sat at your usual table with ona and some of the other younger girls, laughing every now and again and joining the conversation when you needed to.
unbeknownst to you, you were the topic of conversation a few tables over. if you weren’t so focused on acting interested in whatever jana and esmee were talking about, you probably would’ve noticed alexia staring at you.
“–she asked to be benched.” she said, bringing all the other conversations around her to a halt.
“qué?” mapi frowned, turning to look at you as well. “she did?”
“sí, before training,” alexia nodded. “she came in early.”
“you said no,” mapi turned back around, frown deepening at her best friends silence. “ale, we need her–“
“you did not see her, maría,” alexia protested quietly with a shake of her head. “she looked like a scared little girl, i could not say no.”
“maybe it’s a good thing,” ingrid cut in, ignoring the glare mapi sent her way. “look at her, she is not in the right headspace right now and she has recognised that. would you rather her lose her temper and actually hurt someone?”
the table grew silent after ingrid’s words and it stayed that way until keira broke it. “ona said earlier that she hasn’t been on her phone in days.”
“with good reason,” lucy said, everyone turning to look at her. “come on girls, you know how much stick she gets after a normal game. it’s probably a million times worse than usual so can you really blame her for not wanting to read any of it?”
oh but you had. you’d read it all. you gave into temptation on the night of the game and with ona sleeping peacefully next to you, you grabbed your phone and looked. it became a nightly routine. wait for ona to fall asleep before crying silently as you let the comments sink in because to you, they were all right.
that was the first of many red cards, you were going to drag barcelona’s reputation down the drain, you were eventually going to put someone in the hospital, your teammates were going to hate you, if they didn’t already, and ona was eventually going to get tired of it all and break up with you.
and if the bags under your eyes, your insistence on not starting, and your unusual quietness wasn’t an indicator that something wasn’t quite right with you, your behaviour during training certainly was.
you didn’t mess around with pina and patri, you moved away from mapi when she began poking at you and you chose to pair up with aitana instead of ona whenever you could. having decided that a bit of space from you every now and again would be best for your relationship. you had suddenly become the poster-girl for good behaviour so that you could blend into the background and alexia would have no reason to call on you.
somehow you managed to keep it up until training had ended and you were the first to head to the showers, getting lost further in your thoughts the longer you stayed in there.
when you got out, you headed straight over to ona, completely bypassing your own cubby. you weren’t really sure how your girlfriend was going to react considering you’d spent half the day ignoring her but you were very relieved when she slipped her arm around your waist and tugged you closer.
“i think ale wants to talk to you.” ona whispered and you immediately shook your head.
“the only person i want to talk to is you,” you whispered back. “and i really really just want to go home.”
that look of desperation was back on your face and ona nudged you towards your cubby with a sigh. you quickly got the message and grabbed your things, following her out without another word.
and later that night as you and ona ate your favourite takeout, she could see that you seemed to be having a mental debate with yourself, glancing up at the spaniard every now and again as you pushed your food around your plate and she pretended not to notice.
but ona knew you. and she knew that pushing would only make you pull further away so instead of making you talk, she let you put on one of your favourite movies and you cuddled into her side, letting yourself relax for the first time in days.
ᡣ𐭩
“you are starting tomorrow.”
your eyebrows furrowed as alexia walked by you, shaking your head and hurrying to catch up to her. “no, ale–“
“i have benched you for three games. no more cariño. we need you.”
alexia’s tone was stern and left no room for arguing, leaving you stood still, glaring at her retreating figure. you knew that your captain hadn’t been pleased about keeping you out, your presence obviously missed on the pitch, growing frustrated with every passing game that you were sat on the sidelines as the team seemed to struggle without you.
you moved slowly towards the lockeroom, ignoring the pit in your stomach that grew with every step. pushing open the door, you were happy that it was relatively empty but as your eyes scanned the faces that were left, that happiness soon faded.
at first you figured that it must’ve been a coincidence but then you spotted your phone in ona’s hand.
your attempt to escape was pathetic really. your arm was caught as soon as you turned around and you were dragged back, someone swiftly kicking the door shut. you glared up at alexia, wrenching your arm from her grip before storming over to ona and snatching the device from her hand.
“none of it is true.”
you weren’t sure who’d said it, too busy shoving everything into your bag with your shaky hands and slapping ona’s away when she tried to help.
“are you listening to me?” it was mapi who grabbed your arms and spun you around, only tightening her grip when you tried to squirm away. “it is not true so stop punishing yourself.”
“maría.” ingrid warned, seeing how worked up you were getting.
“no. she needs to know.”
tears burned in your eyes and as soon as the first sob left your lips, her hands were in the air and she was taking a step back. you sat back into the cubby, placing your head in your hands. “it is true, it’s happening again.”
frido was the only person to pick up on the last word and she pushed herself up from her spot next to ingrid, moving to kneel in front of you. “what do you mean again?”
you froze momentarily. glancing up, you saw her looking at you with so much love and care that you crumbled.
“i was fourteen, there was a girl at the academy i was in and she was really mean. she gave everyone a hard time and she said something to me one day, i can’t remember what it was but i remember how angry it made me and–and i tackled her in training, i–i sent her to the hospital, broke her leg in three places.”
the silence you were met with was exactly what you were expecting and your lips trembled, a shaky sigh falling from them as ona grabbed your hand, entwining your fingers with hers. “amor, you did not mean to–“
“the doctors told her that she’d never play again,” you deadpanned. “and as far as i’m aware she hasn’t. the–the other girls shunned me, they hated me and they didn’t hide it. i was benched for weeks until i moved to a different academy, my new teammates somehow found out what had happened and they turned on me too. i think they were scared of me. it was horrible. i didn’t have any friends, nobody liked me. the anger i felt that day, i–i felt it again with olga. did i hurt her?”
“no,” ona shook her head. “she was fine.”
you hadn’t noticed that frido had stood up and ushered mapi and ingrid out until alexia was the one kneeling in front of you. “you should have told me.”
“i don’t tell anyone. this is the first time i’ve spoke about it in years,” you frowned, leg bouncing. “i don’t want to hurt anyone else, i can’t go through that guilt again.”
ona reached out with her free hand and brushed her fingers along your fading bruise, leaning into her touch.
alexia’s hand was on your knee then, pushing down to keep your foot on the ground. you turned to look at her, anxiety bubbling in your stomach.
“you will start tomorrow,” she told you. your shoulders dropped and you leaned back into ona. “but if you want to be subbed off at any point, i will make sure it happens, vale?”
“vale.” you sighed.
“good,” alexia reached over and grabbed your training top, unceremoniously tugging you forward to press a kiss to your head. “now go home and get some sleep. you look awful.”
“charming.” you muttered, pulling a face at the blonde as she left the lockeroom.
“i think you look beautiful, mi vida.” ona whispered in your ear and you felt your cheeks heat up.
“you have to think that, it’s in the job description,” you rolled your eyes fondly, turning your attention to her. “can we go home though? wanna nap with you.”
“por supuesto, vamos.”
as soon as you entered the apartment, ona was tugging you towards the bedroom, your quiet giggles filling the silence. the spaniard threw herself onto the bed before pulling you on top of her, running her fingers through your hair as you nuzzled her neck. “love you, oni.”
“love you too bebé. no matter what.”
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barcaatthemoon · 21 days
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stood up || barcelona x teen!reader ||
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you get stood up on your first date, and alexia enlists some help to make you feel better.
there was something special in the air as you got ready for your date. you hadn't told anybody, but it was your very first date. between your teammates and your parents pushing you to focus on school or football, your chances for dating had been slim. at least they had been before you were asked out by the very cute captain of the basketball team, matthias.
matthias was everything that you had been told to look out for in a guy. not only did he look like the literal prince charming, but he was also very sweet. the two of you had run into each other at your school's gym a couple of times, and he had always held the door open for you and carried your bag to your car for you.
everything was going to be perfect tonight, and you just knew it. you were giddy as you rode your bike over to the restuarant. for a brief moment, you felt panic when you didn't see him before realizing that you were early.
it was hours later when you realized that matthias wasn't coming. you tried your hardest not to make a scene as you gathered your things and made your way out of the restaurant. you thought that you were home free whenever you heard a voice call out your name from across the parking lot.
"(y/n)!" alexia shouted. you slowly turned around to see her running towards you excitedly. it could have easily just been an accident running into her, but she was the one who you had texted the location of your date to. "oh, you look so pretty nena. how was your date?"
"i-it was good," you tried to lie. alexia's eyes narrowed for a moment, but she dropped it.
"where is the boy? um, matthew, was it? i would like to meet him," alexia said. that was it, your entire facade came crashing down as you erupted into a fit of tears. alexia held you tightly in her arms, catching just enough to know exactly what to do.
"shh, come on, you shouldn't let that stupid boy ruin your night. did you get anything to eat in there?" you shook your head. "well then, i'll have frido pick up some of that pizza that you like so much and we can have ourselves a slumber party. i know it's hard to believe, but mapi knows a thing or two about being stood up."
"i would have thought she did the standing up," you muttered as alexia led you towards her car.
"the party has arrived!" mapi and lucy shouted as they entered alexia's apartment. the woman had never been so fortunate to have a penthouse before befriending the two defenders. she didn't understand their constant need to be rambunctous. frido had arrived about 5 minutes earlier, and with some coaxing, managed to convince you to eat a bit.
"you are so lucky that i love you enough to let these idiots stay," alexia said as she nudged your side. you smiled and wrapped your arms around her in a tight hug. the moment was sweet, and broken up as soon as mapi jumped onto the couch with the two of you. "get off of me, you're too heavy!"
"must be all that muscle," mapi said as she flexed. alexia tried pushing mapi off of her lap, but the woman was a bit too quick. she scrambled fully into your lap and pressed a kiss to your forehead. "you look very beautiful. this boy, matthias, he is the stupidest one in all of spain, maybe even europe. i'd beat him up, but his kind of stupid might rub off."
"thank you for the offer mapi," you laughed. she clapped her hands and cheered as you smiled. it definitely still stung a bit, but you found it very difficult to be upset with your teammates surrounding you.
several more of your teammates flooded into alexia's apartment, filling up the living room completely. if it was any other night, you would have thought it was a party. in a way, it sort of was a party thrown just to cheer you up after your date had stood you up. a party that alexia "no parties during the season" putellas had thrown for you in the middle of the season.
"hey kid, how are you feeling?" alexia asked as things started to die down a bit more. most of the team was laying around anywhere that they could, a handful of the girls having already gone to alexia's guest rooms to sleep.
"better, a lot better. thank you for doing this," you told her. alexia smiled as she reached her hand up for you to take. you did so, knowing that if you didn't, you'd be sharing the couch with bruna, pina, and cata. it wouldn't have been too bad if you didn't already know that pina kicked in her sleep, bruna clung to the closest person she could find like a koala, and cata was horridly restless.
"i am sorry that you got stood up tonight," alexia said as she walked you towards her room. you had slept over before, but this was the first time that you didn't have to bribe alexia to let you watch a movie as you tried to fall asleep. you could hear the opening song of one of your favorite romantic comedies playing on the tv as you entered the room.
"come on." frido patted the spot in the middle of the bed for you to lay down. you excitedly ran over and got comfortable in the spot offered to you. alexia moved a bit slower, but once she was close enough, offered her hand for you to hold as you curled up beside frido. you barely made it 10 minutes into the movie before you were practically dead to the world.
"it's easy to forget how little she is sometimes," alexia said quietly as she glanced down at you. "she looked so hurt earlier, i didn't know what to do."
"you did the right thing, ale. look at her, she had a great night all things considered. this could happen again, and if it does, she'll know to lean on us for support. she wants to be so much like you that it hurts her," frido said. alexia knew that the swedish woman had a point. everybody could see the little things that you tried picking up from alexia since you had joined barcelona. it was flattering, but alexia thought that you'd be better off if you were just yourself in the long run.
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woso-dreamzzz · 1 month
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Tears III
Alexia Putellas x Child!Reader
Summary: A slow morning
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The day that Mami and Jenni break up starts with rain.
They'd sat you down on the sofa and explained that they weren't together any more. They loved each other but they weren't in love with each other.
You didn't understand that, not really, but you pretended that you did because that would make Mami and Jenni happy.
Jenni left the house. She left the house but she also ended up leaving Barcelona too for Mexico but she explained that even though she wasn't in love with your Mami anymore, didn't mean that she didn't love you with all her heart.
You think that you love Jenni too even though she left the country and the house.
You don't love any of the Barcelona girls nearly as much as you love Jenni so training was now difficult. You didn't understand them well. You were painfully shy and with Jenni gone, you stuck close to Mami. You branch out to Teeny's mummies sometimes because they have Teeny and Teeny's your favourite but that's about it.
You were getting better though, of that Alexia was sure. With the World Cup callup and everything going on, there was no choice but to take you with her.
Any progress you seemed to have made, immediately disappeared. You clung to Alexia like you thought something was wrong. When it wasn't her, it was Jenni.
It was like you didn't even know who the other Barcelona girls were. You clung so firmly to Alexia and Jenni that neither quite knew how to cope.
You had always been like this, skittish and scared and maybe Alexia enabled it a bit too much but she could never get the image of you in your incubator out of her mind.
You were so, so tiny and so, so sick and she was so scared to lose you that she caused this behaviour in you now.
"Mami," You say softly one morning.
You're tucked under Alexia's arm as the early morning Australian sun filters in through the curtains.
This is probably one of the other bad habits that Alexia had enabled. There was something in her that just couldn't sleep properly if you weren't tucked up next to her.
You didn't get any proper skin-to-skin contact until seven weeks after you were born and even then, you were still sickly so it was never for long.
Alexia had started cosleeping with you the moment it was safe. It grounded her. It soothed her to know that you were safe and protected in her arms.
"Hola, pequeñita," Alexia coos, sliding open her eyes," Do you want to get breakfast?"
"Please, Mami."
It's a rest day today and Alexia is more than happy to do whatever you want. This whole World Cup has been stressful on you and she's trying her best to make sure the rest of it runs smoothly.
A few of the other girls are already at breakfast and, like clockwork, you hide behind Alexia's legs as she loads up your plate.
"Pequeñita? Do you want to go and choose a table for us?"
You glance around the room and the way your Mami's teammates have already spread themselves out. You shake your head and move closer.
"Are you sure?" Jenni's voice from behind shocks you and you turn around to look at her. "Why don't we choose a seat so your Mami can fill her plate?"
You let go of Alexia's hand to take Jenni's as the adults swap plates.
It's more so Jenni choosing the table you sit at, partially filled with some of the Barcelona girls but it's the least filled in the room and at least you semi-know them.
You give them all a little wave because that's polite before you hide yourself in Jenni's neck. Her arms wrap around you easily. She used to hold you a little like this when you were littler and it makes you feel incredibly safe.
She feeds you bites of your breakfast as she speaks to the other Barca girls and she doesn't coax you out of your hiding spot and force you to interact with them.
Mami arrives soon after and takes the seat next to you and Jenni. She doesn't have to do much but eat her own food, though she keeps glancing at you.
Alexia can tell that you're still a bit sleepy, the type of sleepy that can only be fixed by a nap rather than waiting longer for you to wake up properly.
You're practically dead of the world on Jenni's chest but still awake enough to whine when Alexia takes you into her arms.
"No," You whine," Jenni." Your hand reaches out for her, finding purchase on the fabric of her t-shirt.
"It's okay," Jenni says," Go with your Mami. I'll be there to see you later."
"Promise?"
"Of course I promise. When have I ever broken a promise to you, pequeñita?"
"Never."
"That's right, never. I'll see you later."
You rest your head on Alexia's shoulder as she walks you back up to your room and get settled in bed again. She cards her fingers through your hair.
"Did you miss Jenni?" She asks.
You nod pathetically. "Miss Jenni."
"I'm sorry, pequeñita, but at least she's here now, huh?"
"We see Jenni later?"
"Well, she promised. You know she won't break a promise to her favourite girl."
"We can see Teeny too?"
"I'll have to call Ingrid but maybe, yes. Would that make you feel better, seeing Teeny?"
"Teeny and Jenni."
"Teeny and Jenni, that's right."
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outsideratheart · 4 months
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By Your Side, Always (Alexia Putellas x reader)
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A/N: We’re supercampeones!!! I’m not sure what this is but I hope you like it.
The first 45 minutes of the game you were having fun, the whole team was. Levante knew that Barcelona would make them work but tonight you and the team were putting on a world class performance. They were never a team to give up but with 7 goals scored and them not being able to find the net, they struggled to find hope and accepted their defeat. They were now fighting to keep the score at 7 and it started to get messy. 
It was clear that you had been made a target by Levante’s entire back line. You didn’t care though, you could take it. If anything you welcomed the physically because it meant you were allowed to give them a taste of their own medicine every so often. 
Alexia wished she could be on the pitch with you but she must admit it was fun being in the stand watching you play the way you were. 
“She’s showing off” Mapi said to no one in particular as she watched you dance around their left back even looking back and smirking to her once you sent the ball into the box. 
“She’s unstoppable when she’s like this” your girlfriend says. 
She regretted her choice of words not even a minute later. There were two defenders between you and the goal. You were determined to make it 8. That is until you get taken out by not one but two players. You felt one set of studs go into the outside of the ankle and another set on the inside. You truly had never felt pain like it. 
Alexia heard your outcry of pain and could do nothing but watch as you laid on the floor clutching your ankle. 
“I need you to get up. I need to go to her” Alexia stood to her feet, desperate to be by your side. 
“You can’t go onto the pitch” Mapi slowly got up, careful not to knock her knee. 
Her warning fell on deaf ears and Alexia was already rushing towards the pitch. As expected she was stopped by Jona but she stayed near the sidelines waiting for you. 
“Please get up” Alexia whispers to herself. She began to fear the worst when she sees the physio signal for a stretcher. 
“We both know she’s too stubborn to use it Alexia. Give her a few minutes and she’ll be up” Jona pats his captain’s shoulder in support. 
The coach was right. It took a little longer than Alexia would have like but you are up on your feet. It’s obvious that the injury is bad because you are using the teams physios as crutches so you don’t put any weight on your ankle. 
What is the ultimate telling sign is the way you refuse to meet Alexia’s gaze when you get to the sidelines. Nevertheless she follows you into the tunnel and waits by the door of the medical room. 
“Come with me, please” you have your back towards Alexia but she can hear the pain in your tone. 
“I’m here” 
Alexia sits on a chair beside you as the physio begins examining your ankle. At the first touch you wince and move your foot away which only makes it hurt more. He gives you a couple of minutes to compose yourself but asks to try again. Your arms hide your face as the pain becomes excruciating. The only thing stopping you from breaking completely is the soothing way Alexia is stroking her hand over your thigh. 
“They’re almost done. Try and breathe for me ok?” 
And try you did but you also failed. It was a form of panic and you knew it. 
The physios explain that they think it’s major ligament damage and that they will take you for scans once you’re back in Barcelona.  
“I’m going to give you some space. Alexia, make sure she ices it and try to get her to stay still. Give it ten minutes then she can put the boot on and use the crutches. No weight on it, understand?” 
“They studded my ankle, not my ears. Don’t speak about me as if I’m not here” you sit up quickly. At least now you understood why you needed to keep still. 
Alexia got up as the physio left. She places ice on your ankle as gently as she could before she turned out the lights. She knew that when you were overwhelmed the darkness help calm whatever you were feeling inside. 
“Whatever it is, i’ve got you. I know how you think and how you’re going to want to do this alone but that won’t happen. I won’t let it”
Alexia moves the chair so that it was closer to your head. She places a gentle kiss on the crown on your head. 
“I don’t want to talk about it” 
You turn your head away from her. That hurt Alexia but she knew it was your coping mechanism and once you’ve processed what’s happened you will be more open to talk.
Alexia had just opened her mouth when she heard a door slam and a lot of foul language. 
“That’s Lucy and if she’s in here for the reason I think then I’m going to kill her” 
Your girlfriend rolled her eyes. You weren’t in the mood for this and deep down she knew the reason why the English defender was now in lockeroom even though there is 10 minutes left, maybe less. 
“Y/N I’m coming in” technically it wasn’t a question but still she could have waited for a response. 
“Get out” you growl. 
“Oh did I interrupt something” Lucy gives you both a playful look. 
“You’re a fucking idiot Luce. I know for a fact you didn’t get subbed off because that wasn’t part of the plan so that only leaves one reason” 
“Y/N calm down” alexia begs.  
“I was defending you. They took you out. I wasn’t going to let them get away with it” Lucy met your anger and walked towards you. That was a mistake. 
“Get out!” You stand up and your own weight collapses underneath you. 
“Lucy, please” Alexia begs your England team mate who raises her hands in defeat and leaves you be. 
She then helps you back on the bed. A couple of minutes pass and you hear the final whistle following by the cheers of your team. 
“I’m not going back out. Torre can lift the trophy” 
“Y/N. You’re their captain and you scored a hattrick. It should be you up there” 
“Well I’m not going to be and you can go tell them. Go Alexia” 
She saw the look in your eyes. The look, which in the past, told her that your mind was made up and there was nothing she could do to change it. 
“Just come out when you’re ready. We don’t let moments pass by without celebrating them. You told me that” before leaving Alexia made sure she turned on the TV so that you could at least watch the trophy ceremony. 
You didn’t like what you just did but you did it anyway. Alexia has had a tough few weeks and she need this, she needed it more than you needed her. 
As instructed Marta lifts the trophy and you feel fine about it. Barcelona has a group of leaders but it just so happens that only one can wear the armband. 
The silence wasn’t comfortable and it started to put you on edge. You saw the boots and crutches by the examination table taunting you.  
Don’t let the moment pass by. 
Alexia watches Marta lift the trophy and then celebrated with the team like they do after every trophy win. She hoped you might have come out by now. 
She is near the centre circle when she hears the crowd errupt. She may have her back to the tunnel but she knows it’s you. 
“I thought you said she wasn’t coming out” Jana asks. 
“No. I said she wasn’t lifting the trophy” Alexia knew you would come out. Due to your slow pace, no thanks to the crutches, Alexia met you half way. 
You let the crutches drop to the floor as you wrap your arms around her neck. 
“I’m sorry for pushing you away. I just —“
“Needed a minute. I know. You’re here now and that’s all that matters” she lets you rest against her as your hands you the crutches. 
“Have you been crying mi amor?” She noticed the tear staines on your cheeks. 
You nod slightly and she can see that something is going on in your head because your eyes begin to well up. Alexia cups your cheek and gently wipes away the stray tear that has fallen. 
“You don’t have to wait until I’m not there to cry Y/N”
“I know” 
Side by side you walk towards your team mates who are all ready to greet you. Bruna is the first one too you, of course she is. 
“Here” she hands you the game ball “I got everyone to sign it for you” 
“Thanks B. You know I’ve got so many of these I’ve lost count. Why don’t you go give it to a fan?” The young forward takes the ball back happily and runs towards a little girl. She makes her turn around so that you can see the fan is wearing you shirt. You send her a little wave and it makes her day. 
“I don’t want to be injured” you stick your bottom lip out causing you girlfriend to chuckle slightly. 
“We’re professional football players, we never want to be injured but sometimes it happens. There’s nothing we can do about it” Alexia was full of wisdom. 
She definetly didn’t feel this way when she got hurt but you decide not reopen old wounds. 
“And these things are stupid” you wave one of your crutches around. 
“Are you going to be complaining everyday until you’re back on the pitch?” 
“Yes Alexia, I am. If you don’t like it then tough because you’re stuck with me” 
“I’m ok with that and I’m ready to return the favour because we both know I wasn’t exactly a ray of sunshine when I got injured” 
“You can say that again. I almost sent you back home to your mothers” you were teasing her and she knew it. You didn’t like being more that 5 feet away from Alexia when she was hurt. 
“We both know if I went back to my mama’s that you would be right behind me” 
You could only nod in agreement. Alexia suggests you do what will be half a lap of the pitch so you can thank you fans. It’s a slow amble but she doesn’t seem to mind. The rest of the team had walked ahead so now it was just you, Alexia, Mapi and Ingrid. 
“Does this mean we can do our physio together?” Mapi asks you. 
“No” Alexia and Ingrid say in unison. 
“Why not? We will push each other to get better” 
“And that’s the reason why. You’re too competive, you will make it into a game and we” she points to herself and Alexia “know that it’ll end badly”. 
When you are back at the hotel you are dragged into the celebrations and for the most part you don’t mind it. After a little while you realise that Alexia isn’t around and that is something you do mind. You feel yourself getting more anxious without having her calming presence beside you. 
Then you hear your phone go off. 
Come to you room. Your rehab starts now. 
When you enter your room, Alexia is standing outside the bathroom. 
“I’m going to need you to remove your clothes” Alexia says and your eyes widen. 
“Ok” you pull your shirt off in record time, the shorts however were more of a task. 
“Let me” once the injured leg was free alexia places your crutches aside “rest on me” she tells you. 
She looks up grinning like a devil which makes you shake your head. She always did have half a mind in the gutter when it came to you. 
“Maybe later” she pecks your lips and doesn’t expect for you to pull her back in for something more passionate. 
“Sure, Putellas”
She pretends to act offended at the use of her surname. Alexia then uses her strength to lift you backwards and onto the bed, something she could have done earlier. 
“I’m going to take your boot off. It might hurt” she was so gentle in the way you undid the Velcro straps. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry” she says when she hears you wince. 
“I’m ok” you reassure her even though you were far from it. 
What happens next came as a shock but a good one. Alexia lifts you up and carries you bridal style towards the bathroom where you are met with a bubble filled bath. 
“You did this for me?” 
“Yes. Although I’m going to be joining you so I guess it’s also for me” 
“Are you now?” You tease. 
Alexia nods her head in excitement with a huge smile plastered on her face. 
Your girlfriend helps you in and then lowers herself behind you. With one hand on your thigh and the other one on your abdomen, you allow yourself to relax. As you tilt your head back to rest against Alexia it gives her full access to your exposed neck and she takes advantage of the opportunity. She knows things can’t get too heated so she settles with peppering kisses on your sensitive spots. 
The two of you stay in the bath until the water becomes cold and your hands like like prunes. 
“You’re strong Y/N, you’ll be ok” Alexia says as she lays in bed with you. You have a movie on and somehow Alexia has gotten some popcorn. 
“I’ll be alright” 
It wasn’t how you expected the night to end. You thought you would be celebrating with your team, jumping for joy and taking advantage of the free champagne. Instead you are in bed, with you leg elevated and ice compressing the injured area. The this one commonality in the current and what come have been; you have Alexia by your side. 
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helen-with-an-a · 2 months
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I need to be perfect
Hi. So I kinda don't like this, but I kinda do at the same time, and I wasn't quite sure how to end it. It was also a really good request so I might use the prompt again in another way. Anyways, I hope you enjoy.
Barca Femeni x Reader ; Alexia Putellas x Reader (Platonic)
Description: R needs to be perfect and doesn't know how to stop.
Word Count: 2.4k
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“When I say ‘jump’, you say ‘how high, coach?’ Got it?” The overweight, middle-aged man with an awful comb-over had shouted to you when you were just 9 years old. His methods were basically abuse, but he produced superstars. And that is what you were going to be. A superstar. It didn’t help that you already had perfectionist tendencies, and your parents were pushy – always expecting brilliance. No, not even brilliance. The best, you had to be the best. Perfect. Flawless. Faultless. Textbook. There was no other choice.
It was no surprise that Barca had come knocking when you were barely 16. You had mixed emotions: elation that Barcelona wanted you, happiness that you could leave the cruel atmosphere you lived in, fear that you weren’t as good as they may have thought, and nervousness that you needed the horrendous conditions to thrive.
Again. More. That wasn’t good enough. You’re not trying. You need to be better. Again. Again. Again.
You had seen the media asking how Barcelona could have signed a 16-year-old rising young talent from a lower league club. The world expected you to be great, Barca expected you to be great, and your parents expected you to be great.
But you didn’t feel great. Not at first. You had turned up to pre-season and noticed how far behind you were from your teammates. You hadn’t considered that it was because they were almost double your age and had been at the club or other high-level ones for years. You were struggling slightly to get the drills – Catalan was the preferred language, and you were still barely competent in Spanish. When the season started, you weren’t used as a sub very much, making your debut in November about 85 minutes into the match. You didn’t get your first start of the season until February. You had gone from being the best in the team at your old club to being a mere blip on the team sheet.
You are useless. You can’t even make it as a sub? You are a waste of time and money. All the effort we spent on you.
Your parents weren’t helping the situation. You already had the voice in your head telling you you weren’t good enough, and the constant barrage of texts, voicemails, and phone calls after another match where you weren’t used was starting to get to you.
So, you started to push yourself. After a season of being on the sidelines too much, you knew you needed to start working harder. You didn’t realise that Jonatan had been hoping to use this first year to let you get accustomed to Spain, the style of play and build your fitness. At first, it was nothing major. You stayed late a few days a week to work on drills, set pieces and technical skills. But then it was staying late every day you had training. And then coming in early. And then you began to run to training, leaving your bags in the locker room overnight for you to go and get changed. And then you began to run back from training, too. And then you added extra at-home workouts (nothing too crazy in the beginning; mainly yoga that turned into Pilates, which turned into an additional 2 hours of bodyweight exercises). For some strange reason, you had been allowed to live by yourself. You think that it was because so many of the girls lived nearby. Ingrid and Mapi lived in the same building as you. Lucy lived on the same road as you, as did Keira, Ona and Aitana. Alexia lived less than a ten-minute walk away, and you were within easy driving distance of everyone else. But because you lived alone, no one noticed how much you were putting your body through, even on your days off and mid-season breaks.
But the hard work was paying off. You started the next season well; pre-season had gone fantastically, and your name appeared on the Starting XI for the first match of the season. It stayed there throughout the year. You had also broken into a constant starter for your national team.
Again. Again. Again. Be better. Do better. Worthless. Poor. Again. Again
You couldn’t see a problem with it. You were fast, strong, technical, good, and great. You were going on two years at Barca, thriving, and playing your best football. You were barely 18, yet you had already been nominated for the Ballon d’Or. Everything was brilliant football-wise. You had to keep going. You couldn’t stop.
Do better. Awful. Again. Be better. Shocking. Rubbish. Useless. Horrible. Again
It was your day off after an intense few weeks when the truth came crashing to the ground. The Champions League had started up again, and a series of away games took place in a short space of time. It was hard with long days away from the comfort of your own home, and your daily routine was not helping the situation. Everyone could tell you weren’t ok – but they assumed it was from the travel. Lucy had picked up a cold or something, Keira was tired, Aitana and Pina were a little achy, and Alexia and Frido were more vigilant over the needs of their bodies. Everyone was exhausted. But you had to keep going. You couldn’t stop.
In your constant pressure to improve, you failed to notice Alexia’s troubled stares, Marta’s questioning looks, Patri’s concerned glances, and Irene’s worried gazes. They knew how hard you pushed yourself … almost. They knew you stayed every day after training, and they were a little concerned. But they didn’t know the extent of it. Not in the slightest.
It was El Clasico. Real Madrid vs Barcelona. A historic rivalry. You wanted nothing more than to lie down and sleep until May, but that wasn’t an option. Everything was fine. You were on the score sheet, winning and playing great football. And then Athenea slid in for a tackle, catching you on your ankle in precisely the wrong spot. You tried (successfully) not to cry, but you couldn’t help the pained gasp that escaped your mouth. Alexia had been by your side instantly, ushering the medics over and holding you in place with her Captain’s stare.
“It’s your ankle, sí?” Alexia knew it was a matter of time before an injury came for you. If only she had stepped in sooner and helped you from overworking yourself. She helped you to your feet and walked you to the dugout.
“What? No! Ale, I’m fine. See,” You stood on your sore foot to prove your point. It hurt like nothing else you’d experienced, but it was fine; you just needed to walk it off.
“No, you sit the rest of this game out, get re-assessed back home and then we see if you can play.” She said with a note of finality as you huffed, turning around and walking off before you could comment.
Terrible. Awful. Be better. Dreadful. Terrible. Hopeless. Incompetent.
You knew it was silly. Your ankle was not ok, but you needed to train. It had been 2 days since El Clasico, and you were forced not to train yesterday, but it had been a travel day, so there wasn’t much you could do. It would be fine; you had trained on injuries before. You had waited until you knew the team would be out on the pitch as you snuck into the gym. Your ankle was heavily taped, but that was fine. You could put some pressure on it – that was all you needed.
You were determined to get at least a little run in. Just a gentle jog, really, barely above walking. Just a quick 5km. Nothing too crazy. You couldn’t afford to stop training, not after everything you have worked for. With your face in a determined expression and the idiocy of a terrified teenager, you got to work. You started on the bike. The movement was a little painful, but it raised your heart rate and got blood flowing. As you moved across the equipment, the door to the gym flew open.
“Qué crees que estás haciendo?” Alexia roared, making you jump out of your skin. Your first thought was that you hadn’t spent enough time on the bike, that she was angry at you for not working hard enough. For stopping. For taking a breather. “You are injured! Why the fuck are you not resting?” Alexia stormed over to you – she seemed angry. Her eyebrows were furrowed, her eyes were dark and stormy, and her mouth was a hard line. She was angry at you. Why was she telling you to rest? Rest? You couldn’t rest. You had to be better. Keep working harder. Push yourself to be the best.
“I …” You couldn’t answer her, you couldn’t make her angrier. You couldn’t disappoint her. “I’m sorry. I just needed some water. I’m starting again in a minute.” You rushed to get your explanation to her. She needed to know you weren’t stopping. You were just moving to a different exercise. You weren’t slacking.
“Again? What have you done already?” She wasn’t calming down. If anything, you were making her angry. With the lack of sleep, the mental exhaustion, the injury, it was becoming too much for you. Tears clouded your vision, Alexia becoming foggy as you tried to stop the emotions from bubbling up.
“I was just moving from the bike. I’ll start running now. I’m sorry. I’m not stopping, I promise.” You were a mess as you moved to start the treadmill.
Alexia stopped to look at you. Really, look at you. Your tired eyes, your dark circles and your sickly skin. The fatigue was evident in the way you stood; your body seemed too heavy for you to hold up. You also looked terrified. She couldn’t work out why, though. Yes, she was angry. A trainer had come into the medical room wondering who had cleared you for exercise. Alexia knew no one had done so; they had told her after the match that it would be 2 weeks or so before you could rejoin training at any level (after the string of injuries, the medical staff were also over-cautious in their assessments of minor injuries). So, she knew you were doing this against their advice. And that made her mad; it was one thing to push yourself in training despite coaches telling you not to overdo it but another to actively go against medical advice. But looking at you, she knew you hadn't asked for medical clearance. You were just a scared little girl.
“No, Chiquita. No, running.” Alexia was a lot calmer now, seeing your lip wobble and your eyes blink rapidly—clearly holding back tears.
“I have to. I can’t stop. I need to be better.” You whispered, ashamed of your perceived weaknesses.
“Cariño,” she cooed, reaching out to you. You flinched, not used to kind touches. Any touches you had received from coaches or captains were ones that would push you into running more, doing more drills, and practicing more set pieces. “Pequeña. You’re injured. You need to rest, mi amor.”
“I can’t rest. I need to train. I need to be better, do better.”
“No, Chiquita. You don’t. You need rest; you need to get well again.” Alexia stepped forward. She could see the war raging in your head – the desire to stop but the need to keep going. “Cariño?” Her kindness made you break. You launched yourself at her, arms wrapping around her neck as you cried into her. “Oh, amor. You’re ok. Está bien. Todo está bien. Prometo. Usted puede parar.” You sobbed into her shoulder, tears dampening her shirt as you howled. Everything was too much. You hurt, you needed to sleep, you wanted to stop, and yet you couldn’t. The voice in your head told you to keep going. Your parents and old coaches told you you weren’t allowed to stop. It was far, far, far too much for you.
“Neña, deep breaths. In … and out … vamos … in … and out.” Alexia instructed as you were becoming hysterical. She made her breaths exaggerated, slow and obvious, helping you to match hers. “Bien hecho, pequeña,” she pressed gentle kisses to your head as she eventually slowed down. “Y/N, I am not angry at you; no one is. But I need to know why you are in here and not at home resting.” Alexia implored, her hazel eyes looking directly at yours.
“I can’t stop,” you said meekly, slightly ashamed of your outburst.
“No entiendo. You can’t stop what?” She spoke slowly, like you would to a child or a scared animal.
“I can’t stop training. I need to be better. I need to do more,” you said, getting agitated—at her lack of understanding or at yourself. You weren’t quite sure.
“Amor, why do you need to be better?” Alexia was truly at a loss. You were so talented; you didn’t need to be better.
“Because everyone says so. They say so.” You looked so fragile and nervous, eyes darting around the room, your fingers twisting around each other.
“Who is ‘they’?”
“My parents … my old coaches.”
“Chiquita, listen to me. You do not need to be better. You are more than enough. You are so, so talented. You work so hard. But pushing yourself will not be good for you, the team, or anyone else. You need to rest, slow down, and allow your body to heal.”
With Alexia’s kind questioning, she soon got to the bottom of everything. You had told her about the harshness you had experienced from a young age, the disappointment and anger your parents had expressed during your first season at Barcelona, and the voice in your head telling you to keep pushing. She knew you had a way to go, but with gentle reminders and constant check-ins, you learnt how to quieten the voices. Training became easier, your home was no longer a place to get more workouts in, and you finally stopped listening to the devils in your life and started paying attention to the angels.
It wasn’t much, but it was a start. And that was all they could hope for.
I hope you enjoyed it. It was kinda short and I don't know if I really like the ending but yeh.
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