#also i should mention im baptist so i do apologize if any of this disagrees with your doctrine—it is not my intention to force the customs o

[comfortfrogblog]

hi :). I'm just here bc I'm having a bit of religious crisis. I'm a 16 y.o girl (like you). I was raised in a Catholic Church, but my mom is actually orthodox (long story). anyway, my mom decided in 2021 that we were going to start going to Orthodox Church, and I agreed bc I didn't really have another choice.

I never really prayed a lot. I think I used to believe in God in a sort of lazy way - I never really prayed or thanked Him, and I was just kind of passive in my belief, if that makes sense. recently, I haven't been doing very well at all mentally, and I kind of just stopped believing in God. I think this was partly brought on by the fact that the orthodox church has some shitty rules (divorce=bad, gay=bad, abortion=bad, etc), and I didn't want to be a part of something that encouraged that kind of exclusivity. I also just don't have a good home life at all - I've always been very lonely, and it just seems like there's a lot of pain in the world, and a lot of bad people that just keep on living. I know I'm just making excuses here, but what I'm trying to say is that I want to believe that God exists, I really do, but I just can't. when I try to pray, I just feel like I'm screaming into a great apathetic black void. my question is, have you ever had a religious crisis like this? and if you have, could you explain how you overcame it? thank you so much. your blog is wonderful :)

ahhh absolutely—im going through one right now lol. in fact, i’d say im constantly going through a religious crisis of sorts. sometimes i dont know whether i should even be allowed to call myself a christian if i struggle this much, but i’ve kind of figured out that struggling is actually the point.

we can never be perfect in our faith. even the most faithful and religious people you know have their flaws and stray from god every single day—we are sinful in nature. but christ paid for our sins with his blood so that we could have eternity with the lord, so that we may be forgiven, so that we may experience the greatest love that there is. im still struggling with this concept—the fact that there is a god who loves us so much that he sent his son to us, and this man died for us. he was crucified and tortured so that we may be saved. jesus was a real person—the most perfect person to ever exist. the savior, the king, the servant.

but i dont deserve that, i tell myself. and im right, actually. none of us deserved it. none of us deserve to be saved, none of us actually deserve to have good things. but that is the point, isn’t it? that god is so merciful he sent his son to die for us, when we never deserved it in the first place? he wants to be with us and have a relationship with us so much that he would forgive our sins and welcome us home. it is because of christ that we are saved and forgiven—not because of our inherent goodness. we have inherent value, but we are not inherently good. christ is the ultimate love, the ultimate good, the ultimate and overarching and sovereign king. so we do not have to grieve over being undeserving; instead, we can rejoice that he provides for us and loves us regardless.

christianity is not easy. it’s not supposed to be—we are called to take up our own crosses and follow jesus. we suffer, we struggle, we hurt, we cry out, we question. it is good to question—we are curious creatures, and it is natural that we long to know the god who loves us. ask, wonder, question. it is okay to go through periods of rocky faith—every single christian that has ever lived has been through the same problem.

but even in our darkest times, when we feel we cannot hear the lord and we think he has forsaken us, he has not. he is crying out for you. he wants you to come running to him. he will always provide for you, and he will always make a way. i have to say that what you said about feeling like you’re crying out into a black void struck me deep—i’ve often thought the same exact thing. but i’ve seen it in the lives of those around me that the more that you try, the more you question, the more you want, the closer you come to seeing what God wants you to see.

and if it’s worth anything, the deepest and most heart-wrenching sentiment i’ve felt my whole life is that of wanting to want him. i want to want to believe, but i still feel the indifference in my heart. i think the answer is to keep trying, keep praying; reach out to people you trust who can give you guidance. the desires of your heart will reflect in your actions—if you really, really want to believe, stop running away. you might not even know you’re running away. we often think we’re the ones chasing God, but the truth is that he is chasing after you. he loves you and wants to be in relationship with you.

#asks #christianity #cathy comforts #also i should mention im baptist so i do apologize if any of this disagrees with your doctrine—it is not my intention to force the customs o #of my denomination on anyone