#also WHO GAVE THE RIGHTS TO MAKE CALHOUN SO HOT

[frasier-crane-style]

Let’s talk about Treks baby

The One Where Riker Stars In The Grey.

When Riker is reassigned to go over a terraforming colony bedeviled by pesky, genetically engineered wolves, a new first officer is assigned to the Enterprise. And he’s kwazy.

The irritatingly named Quintin Stone is sort of the Nick Locarno to Peter David’s later Mackenzie Calhoun. Brooding rogue, troubled past, gets the job done, you know how it goes. It’s a pretty unabashed power fantasy/Mary Sue in New Frontier, but there the whole thing is so over the top and tongue in cheek that you really can’t take it too seriously. Quintin, on the other hand, is more played for drama--for most of the story, there’s a question as to whether he’s outright homicidally insane. Luckily, Troi is on top of things, checking on his mental well-being and also kinda being his love interest, like a literal version of this gif.

Spoiler alert: It turns out he’s deeply traumatized by a not wholly believable incident in his past*, so good on ya for catching that one, Troi. 

Looking back on it, this book would almost seem to count as a deconstruction of the ‘broody antihero’ trope, showing that the character type just doesn’t work in TNG. He infuriates most of the cast and doesn’t get the girl, while those who are taken in by him are presented as saps (yup, Wesley). 

Speaking of New Frontier, with the self-aware jokeyness and tongue-in-cheek acknowledgment of Trek’s campier elements, would it be fair to say PAD was ahead of the curve in predicting the modern incarnation of Trek? Its take on Star Trek would definitely fit in with the Kelvinverse movies and especially with The Orville, which is pretty much the people’s choice for Trek these days.

*Okay, I get the interpretation of the Prime Directive as not interfering or revealing yourself to alien cultures until they develop warp drive, at which point they’re going to figure out you’re there anyway. And if you can stop an asteroid from wiping them out without them knowing about it, fine. Cool. I get that. But I don’t get Star Trek stories where the PD means you can’t interfere with the Romulans’ development, even though they’re showing up on your doorstep every other week and shooting at you. It’s like saying if Hitler 2.0 showed up in Germany and started amassing power, the US shouldn’t try to discourage that shit or, I guess, engage in any diplomacy whatsoever. It’s mindbogglingly isolationist. And isn’t it arguable that part of a culture’s natural development is interacting with other cultures? Like the back and forth between America and Japan driving forward the medium of animation?

The One Where Picard Nearly Bangs Guinan’s Sister

This one has a bit of nontroversy attached to it, because it came out while Star Trek was still kind of hashing out the Borg, so there’s a disclaimer at the beginning basically going

The gist of it is that Borg aren’t supposed to have gender (a bunch of people with blue hair just had their ears perk up, didn’t they?), but PAD here has a drone that gets detached from the Collective and is a girl. It seems pretty self-evident to me--Picard gets assimilated, they get him back, he’s still a dude, so why wouldn’t it work that way with a chick? But this is back when assimilation wasn’t the Borg’s m.o. the way it would later become. They assimilate a Ferengi in this book (yup) and it’s kind of a big deal. Oh, and as you might’ve guessed, Girl Borg bears a few similarities to Seven of Nine, who would show up later in the franchise, although PAD’s take on it is more “we rescued a girl from a serial killer’s basement after ten years and she’s totally catatonic,” less “what is this human emotion you call ‘kissing’?”

Good thing we have Deanna Troi, a counselor, to ease Girl Borg through the healing process. Oh, wait, she basically takes one look at GB and goes

Thanks for the help, Troi. I guess this subplot is supposed to prove that it’s pointless to try to save any assimilated person other than Picard, because mentally they’re already dead, so might as well just have a bunch of fun guiltlessly blowing them away

(And that goes for you too, audience.) But still, bit of a downer. At least Spock would’ve tried a mind-meld.

There’s also this chick Delcara, who in a pretty XXtra Flamin' Hot narrative choice is like Picard’s soulmate and he’s sort of in love with her slash obsessed with her after having a psychic vision of her in Starfleet Academy and y’know? TNG might’ve opened the door to this by having Crusher bang a ghost, but we should close that door. We should close it right now.

(By the way, in case you’re wondering if this Guinan’s sister business means Picard is down with the swirl, it turns out she’s Guinan’s adopted sister, so is it just me or is that weirdly ambiguous? She’s a beautiful black woman and Picard wants to do her. You can come out and say it, book. No one minds.)

Anyway, Delcara is piloting one of dem planet-killers from back in TOS--in hindsight, it’s weird that the Abrams movies never did anything with the one big Death Star-y thing that actually is canon to TOS, isn’t it? They gave Khan and Nero ridiculously super-sized ships, but the one kaiju that’s actually in continuity, nothing--on a vendetta against the Borg, who basically killed her family twice over. Man, if only there were some kind of psychologist on board the Enterprise to help her through that trauma.

I sense she feels great bitterness, Captain.

Yeah, why does she get a seat next to the Captain again? Let Worf have that seat. How is it fair that he has to stand around all day, he actually does stuff!

Anyhoo, as you might’ve guessed from the opening set on a holographic rendition of Don Quixote, with a Data Discussion(tm) of quixotic endeavors... and the fact that Delcara intends to totally wipe out the Borg, gosh, I wonder if she’ll succeed--this one’s something of a downer. It does give the promised Planet Killer on Borg Cube action for those fanboys who’ve wondered who would win in a wrassling match, and Picard learns a valuable lesson about not pursuing suicidal vendettas against the Borg, which he definitely takes to heart...

(Wow, he did that one-handed? What kind of gains does Sir Patrick have?)

But still... bit depressing.

The One Where Bones Becomes A Space Pirate

Another giant novel, I’m surprised this one never got raided for parts in any adaptation. Even on the page, it’s pretty breathtakingly cinematic, and yet, the only part of it that’s really been used is, if you squint, Bob Burnham in Discovery being a disgraced Starfleeter.

The premise is that, some months ago, the TOS Enterprise crew was involved in a breaking of the Prime Directive that resulted in the destruction of a world and the ‘Enterprise 5′ of bridge officers blamed for the tragedy being shunned and hated wherever they go (ah, that utopian Star Trek future, predicting an entire population that’s politically engaged). 

Now, with the command crew scattered, everyone’s trying to get back to the planet where it all happened to find out what tf went down for reals. In a bit of a stretch, this is really hard for them--no one seems to be able to call in a favor or hire Han Solo to take them there or anything, which I suppose is in keeping with Star Trek 3′s similar situation six years prior. They don’t have to go so far as to steal a Constitution-class this time. I suppose it’s fitting for the wild and woolly TOS era. In TNG time, they’d probably be able to dial a Space Uber. (As it turns out, it seems like if they’d just coordinated their plans, they all could’ve hitched a ride with Spock, but then there’d be no book, much less a Giant Book.)

Anyway, Kirk’s been court-martialed and is working as an asteroid miner, Chekov and Sulu fall in with Orion pirates, Spock is challenging the whole thing in court, and Uhura’s in jail........oh. It’s like that, huh, Starfleet?

Like I said, most of the plot involves the crew going off on all their separate adventures, eventually getting the band back together and figuring out what went down. Apparently, the book was criticized for its nonlinear structure, but I think it worked out really well. Starting months after the incident, with everyone disgraced, gets you pumped to find out what happened. Then when they flashback to the shit going down, there’s a great sense of foreboding because you know something is going to happen, just not what exactly. 

If I can make a criticism, it’s that after some great build-up, the ending seems a bit anticlimactic. The nature of the threat requires some unbelievable Hollywood Evolution to buy (nothing new for Star Trek, admittedly, and this is a crew that’s fresh off meeting Apollo and Abraham Lincoln) and while it is fitting that they’re able to resolve the situation without blowing up anything or punching anyone (Star Trek loves to talk the talk about how anti-military it is, then end their movie with some Klingons getting blasted), it still seems a little... dry. You’re not going to have Kirk hang off of anything, story? Not even a little? Okay. I still had fun. 

And you’ll note that once again, Deanna Troi was of no help whatsoever. Geez, woman, you’re oh for three here!

#star trek #peter david #judith and garfield reeves-stevens

[iamchikara]

Results for Chikarasaurus Rex under the cut. As with yesterday’s results, only point gains will be recorded. Point totals will not be touched, as they are still in flux due to the Regency Furniture results fiasco. A full update to the point standings covering all three shows, as well as any others that happen in the interval (next one is in October so I really hope this isn’t dragged out for a month) will be done once those results are released.

Match #1: Singles Contest John Francis of Coronado vs. Jakob Hammermeier w/Der Wildebeest John Francis is starting to morph into this weird mish-mash of previous American-hero types, as he used the big boot and legdrop, several of John Cena’s moves, the Angle Slam, and the ankle lock. I’m not sure how to feel about that. Anyways, the ankle lock made Jakob submit. WINNER: John Francis of Coronado (1 point) Match #2: Tag Contest, Campeonatos de Parejas Defense #1 Travis Huckabee and Tony Deppen vs. Lucas Calhoun and Stray Kat First fall went to F.I.S.T. with a small package on Calhoun after a corner kick doubleteam...and then the second fall went to them as well, as Deppen hit a double stomp on Kat while Huckabee had her in the stretch muffler. For how long we had to wait for this first defense, F.I.S.T. taking it in two straight is a bit of a disappointment for me, though at the same time it also conveys the renewed dominance that F.I.S.T. has displayed lately. WINNERS: Travis Huckabee and Tony Deppen Match #3: Singles Contest Missile Assault Man vs. Kobald MAM got the win by submitting Kobald with the Sharpshooter, then was attacked by Hallowicked and Frightmare. Lucas Calhoun and Stray Kat came to MAM’s aid, with Calhoun telling MAM that he couldn’t fight the world alone before they shook hands. Trio #15? WINNER: Missile Assault Man (1 point) Match #4: Singles Contest Fire Ant vs. Cajun Crawdad Crawdad spent the entire match trying to blind Fire, but got put away with a brainbuster after Fire got sick of that. WINNER: Fire Ant (1 point) Match #5: Singles Contest BLANK vs. Penelope Ford This is prob’ly Ford’s last CHIKARA match, as she’s full time with AEW starting next month. Accordingly, BLANK ended his obsession with the Color Wheel. Post-match, he called out Still Life for King of Trios. Considering that we haven’t actually gotten much of a reason for the breakup of the Nouveau Aesthetic beyond BLANK’s obsession with Ford and Still Life having other things to do, it’s weird that we get to this point right now and not, say, at the Season finale or something. WINNER: BLANK (1 point) Match #6: Singles Contest, Grand Championship Defense #1 (as undisputed champion) Dasher Hatfield vs. Mick Moretti Lot of interesting notes described to me from commentary. Technically, this is Dasher’s eighth defense, though first as undisputed champion. Moretti’s facepaint resembled that of one of the Baseball Furies from The Warriors, with suggestions that he was using it to get under Dasher’s skin. Most harshly, Sidney Bakabella claimed that Dasher asked for the match to go on early so he could go home and be with his kids...even though Boomer’s match was on later. See? Toxic! Described as a hot back and forth match, and Dasher successfully retained. WINNER: Dasher Hatfield INTERMI...no, not quite, pre-taped interview from Ophidian hyping up Matt Makowski. Someone possibly jumped the gun with that, but considering how disruptive the Crucible’s been lately, it fit right in with their modus operandi. Then INTERMISSION. It’s time for the Crucible’s presence on this show, as the ropes are down and Ophidian brings out his entire cadre including their referee. Match #7: Crucible Exhibition #1 Matt Makowski vs... Thief Ant is out to answer the challenge, but is shut down fairly quickly and made to tap out with a cross armbreaker. WINNER: Matt Makowski (1 point...I guess? If our esteemed Director of Fun is legitimatizing this whole thing...) Match #8: Crucible Exhibition #2 Evan Matthew Demorest vs... Still Life answers this one, to a huge reaction from the crowd. Unfortunately for Still Life, they didn’t fare any better than Thief, and the match was stopped after they were knocked out with the Demoralizer (a variant of the Last Ride powerbomb). WINNER: Evan Matthew Demorest (1 point...I guess? It’s being treated as a legit part of the show...) Ophidian issues a third open challenge on the behalf of Tunku Amir... Match #9: Crucible Exhibition #3 Tunku Amir vs... ...which is answered by a voice in the crowd screaming “I WILL!” and Jawbreaker Josue/Joey, accompanied by Xavier Faraday and Josh Wells, appears. Joey scored what looks to be the first actual victory against the Crucible cadre, forcing Amir to submit, then racing out of the building with Wells and Faraday, leaving Ophidian to fume and berate Amir before leading his followers out. WINNER: Jawbreaker Josue/Joey (1 point...I guess? Didn’t go Ophidian’s way...) INTERMISSION AGAIN Mike Quackenbush is out to address the crowd. As he apparently suffered an injury at Earning The Lucha Libre Merit Badge, he’s withdrawing from his match on here, and has handpicked Hallowicked as Joey Janela’s opponent. Match #10: Singles Contest Hallowicked vs. Joey Janela In what’s prob’ly Janela’s last CHIKARA match as well (same situation as Ford), he scored the victory with a top rope elbow drop. I don’t get why that happened, but it did. Hopefully some kind of deal can be worked out with AEW, so that he can at least come back and not sit in the inactive part of the standings. WINNER: Joey Janela (1 point) Match #11: Trios Contest The Crucible (Lance Steel, The Whisper, and Devantes) vs. the Creatures of the Deep (Oceanea, Merlok, and Hermit Crab) Bouncing back from their utter humiliation earlier in the show, the Crucible returned to form here, as Devantes pinned Merlok after a TKO. Post-match, the Queen of the Deep was not happy in the slightest with her charges, berating and hitting the big fish in her fury, then told her subjects that they’d regret it if they kept losing. Oceanea, I love ya but they’ve been losing all along and you haven’t done a thing about it, what makes you think they’re going to take that threat seriously? WINNERS: The Crucible Match #12: Singles Contest Princess Kimberlee vs. Solo Darling Kim returned to CHIKARA in strong fashion, defeating Solo with the Alligator Clutch after a Ganso Bomb. Post-match, she shook Solo’s hand, then addressed everything that has been going on. (Below is the transcription, provided by Freakin’ Awesome Network forum lildude8218) "This is just Kimber Lee here for a minute. I need to get real with you guys. Everybody has a past. Every single person here. And in Pittsburgh mine hit me smack in the face. It's something I've ran from for SO LONG and so far even to the point where I gave up my crown to keep this hidden from you. I was a different person in the past, everything you heard it wasn't wrong. I did use Lance Steel as a stepping stool to get where I am. But here's the thing: in life we all do things we regret but it's what you do afterwards that defines who you are. And I am a different person now. So this crown jewel is going to do whatever it takes to make things right." Ophidian interrupts her. "I know how you can make peace with your past. You call yourself the Princess. The Crown Jewel. But you have no kingdom. You have no purpose. The way to make peace with Lance Steel and the Whisper is by becoming a resource of the Crucible." He tells the Whisper to get in the ring and pay his respect. He tells Kim to do the same. She does. "Your new purpose is to lead me and my team to victory at King of Trios. Leave!" So yes, the deep, dark secret that Princess Kimberlee has been harboring for years, the one that she left CHIKARA to protect, the one that she let herself be first blackmailed over and now outright conscripted, is that she was a jerk to Knight Eye 4 The Pirate Guy years ago. This is something that everyone paying attention to Wrestling is Fun! at the time already knew, that anyone not in the know could easily look up, and that I’ve never seen anything even remotely resembling an outcry over. The past is past. People change. We all know that. Dwelling on regrets and holding onto things long past their relevance isn’t healthy. Why Kim let herself be bothered by something like that this far into the future from it is...concerning. Perhaps she’s weaker-willed than we all thought. Who knows? WINNER: Princess Kimberlee (1 point) Match #13: Singles Contest Volgar w/Professor Hugo Nicodemus vs. Boomer Hatfield Boomer tried his best to fight back from the underdog position, even nearly surprising Volgar with a bulldog off the top, but Volgar scored the victory in the end. WINNER: Volgar (1 point) Match #14: Tag Contest Xyberhawx 2000 (Danjerhawk and Razerhawk) vs. Cornelius Crummels and Sonny DeFarge Danjer scored the win for his team with an O’Connor Roll pin on Crummels. Man, those legitimate businessmen can’t catch a break lately, can they? WINNERS: Xyberhawx 2000 (1 point) Match #15: MAIN EVENT, Singles Contest, JKI Finals Green Ant vs. Ophidian Green Ant attempted some psychological warfare by coming out with an Ophidian mask on over his own, but Ophidian wasn’t having any of it and bumrushed him (and even rolled out of the CHIKARA Special) before tapping him out. Post-match, the Crucible paid their respects to end the show. WINNER: Ophidian (1 point...JKI is one point per round adding up to the three)

#CHIKARA #Chikarasaurus Rex #Results

[pwchronicle]

Chikara “Let’s Get Invisible“ - Live Show Report December 8th in Philadelphia, PA

This was Chikara’s final show of 2018 and the finale of their 19th season. A loaded card in front of a capacity crowd.

1. Juan Francisco de Coronado beat Green Ant via submission with the Coronado Clutch. I thought this was a good way to open the show with Wrestle Factory favorite Green Ant, and a nice opener featuring a lot of mat exchanges. Juan worked over Green Ant’s leg, and he caught him in the Clutch when Green Ant came at him flying off the top rope.

2. Cornelius Crummels & Sonny Defarge won a Four Corner Tag Team Eliminator over Los Ice Creams (Ice Cream Jr. y El Hijo del Ice Cream), F.I.S.T. (Icarus & Tony Deppen), and Jeremy Leary & Blanche Babish. Deppen tried to come on to Babish at the start to no avail, offering her a night out at Olive Garden, her treat. Icarus wrestled the entire match wearing his jacket, so he didn’t show off his back tattoo, but he was wrestling in trunks and showing off his leg tattoo, which Leary mocked. Los Ice Creams were the first team out fairly quickly, when Crummels rolled up Hijo as they attempted to suplex Defarge. A new trick in the repertoire of Crummels and Defarge was Defarge ramming his foot into Babish’s face after Crummels sneezed on it (it’s Flu Season you jerks!). The two rudo teams worked together against Leary and Babish, but they eventually came at odds over who could pick up the pinfalls, allowing a hot tag to Babish, who cleaned house on all four of them briefly. Babish soon after made Deppen tap out to the Soda Jerk, eliminating him and Icarus. Crummels and Defarge scored the third and final fall after hitting Leary with the old high low, clipping his knee and hitting him with a lariat. These two falls led to Crummels and Defarge accruing three points for a shot at Los Campeonatos de Parejas next year. Fun character exchanges, fun action.

3. BLANK (w/ Still Life with Apricots and Pears) beat Penelope Ford with a forearm to the back of the head. Still Life came out with a camera. Decent match between these two, with Ford fighting from behind and hitting some cartwheel-based offense and a dive to the floor to get the crowd going. She may have done one backflip too many though, as BLANK caught her with the forearm as she rebounded off the ropes to pick up the win. Ford acted like she was knocked out, and after the match BLANK positioned her into a pose while laid out on the mat. BLANK called this pose “A Lilly in Place of a Rose” and had Still Life take pictures of her. Shades of “The Killing Joke” if you ask me.

4. Lucas Calhoun & Missile Assault Man & Axel Ford beat Professor Nicodemus and the Proteus Wheel (Volgar & Frantik & Callux the Castigator) in a 4-on-3 Philadelphia Street Fight when Missile Assault Man pinned Nicodemus after an inverted DDT. This was the first time I can recall Chikara having a street fight on one of their events, and it was suitably chaotic. The Proteus Wheel brought a trash can full of plunder. Calhoun (wearing a shirt reading “Punch More Nazis”) and his partners were able to send the Proteus Wheel to the floor early and isolate Nicodemus, but he sprayed something in their faces to get away, opting to stay on the floor throughout most of the match. Callux hit Ford (no relation to Penelope) with the trash can lid and a cookie sheet. Calhoun retrieved a bunch of steel chairs from under the ring and walloped his opponents with them. Ford, continuing to have a tough time, received a double chokeslam onto a dusty ironing board. Calhoun was able to prevent Missile Assault Man (sporting a bandaged ankle from “Don’t Go To Sleep!”) getting pillmanized again, leading to Missile Assault Man pillmanizing Frantik’s ankle. He then put Frantik in a figure four, but Volgar broke it up with a splash. Volgar also slammed Calhoun off the top rope onto a bunch of chairs Calhoun had set up earlier. Missile Assault Man hit Volgar with a fishing rod and buried him under chairs, Nicodemus hit him with a bat to no avail, and Nicodemus was once again cornered before his experiments saved him. Callux hit a Boss Man Slam onto a trash can for a nearfall. Eventually, the Proteus Wheel was wiped out on the floor after Calhoun clocked Volgar with his own chain and sent him off the top, allowing for the rather anticlimactic comeuppance for Nicodemus. The fans were into the action and outcome. Other trash can plunder, such as a golf club and a hockey stick, were not used.

- First of two intermissions held.

5. Hallowicked beat Boomer Hatfield after a third snapmare off the top. A short match where Hallowicked was largely dominant, suplexing the younger Hatfield around the ring. Boomer was able to leave the ring on his own afterward.

6. The Creatures of the Deep (Oceanea, Merlok, Hermit Crab, and Cajun Crawdad) beat Fire Ant, Thief Ant, Razerhawk, and Danjerhawk after Oceanea and Merlok hit the Tidal Wave on Razerhawk. They attempted the Tidal Wave the first time on Danjerhawk, but his partners pulled him to the floor, so Oceanea dived onto them off of Merlok’s back. A second attempt, onto Razerhawk, was countered into powerbomb on Merlok by the two ants. Razerhawk scored a nearfall on Oceanea with a Swanton afterward. A lot of fun action throughtout, including Crab hitting Thief Ant with a Spanish Fly off the middle rope, Crab attempting his crab walk on the ropes but taking a hurricanrana off the ropes by Razerhawk, and Razerhawk immediately afterward taking a Muscle Buster by Merlok. Fire Ant caught Merlok with his running kick, but almost fell prey to Oceanea’s fish hook. On the last event November 24th (the Cibernetico show that I was unable to recap here), Oceanea set a message to Crab and Crawdad that there would be consequences if they fail her again, so the two loyal servants/jesters of this court of creatures pulled their weight, preventing any interference from the third attempt at the Tidal Wave being successful. The Creatures of the Deep all celebrated over Razerhawk’s crushed body as Danjerhawk tended to him.

7. Solo Darling beat Travis Huckabee via submission to what looked like the Million Dollar Dream. A strong grudge match and maybe my favorite on the card. Darling wanted to get at Huckabee immediately upon her music hitting. She got him into a Regal Stretch right away. After lots of back and forth, including lots of kicks from Darling, it went to the floor, where Huckabee caught Darling in the Stretch Muffler and threw her into a ring post. Making their way back inside, Huckabee caught her with a piledriver, which he used to take put Darling on the shelf at “La Lotería Letal,” but here it was only good enough for a nearfall. He then hit a second piledriver. He then attempted a cloverleaf (perhaps Darling’s own Sharp Stinger), but Darling maneuvered to the ropes and was sent to the outside. Huckabee pulled the mats up off the floor to attempt a third piledriver on the unprotected floor, but Darling gave him a back body drop instead. Back in the ring, Huckabee suckered Darling into rollup nearfall after a fake apology and doing their old handshake with her, but Darling recouped and scored the satisfying submission win.

8. Princess KimberLee & The Whisper beat The Regime (Sloan Caprice & Rick Roland) to win Los Campeonatos de Parejas 2 falls to 1. Carrying on with the story from when they won the tournament at “La Lotería Letal,” Lee wanted nothing to do with Whisper during this match. They never made actual tags, just lucha style tags by exiting the ring, such as when Lee entered the match for the first time after Whisper took a ton of punishment. Caprice pinned Lee with a rollup to score the first fall. Lee was at a disadvantage afterward, but she didn’t tag out when she had the opportunity to. She was able to even up the falls when Roland missed hitting her with a sexton off the top. Lee also weakened Caprice’s knee with a targeted kick, and Caprice sold it for the rest of the match. Whisper got back in when Lee went to the floor and scored a number of nearfalls. Caprice caught Whisper with a rollup, but Lee instinctually came in and broke it up. Whisper hugged her afterward, causing Lee to hit him with a German suplex. However, Whisper was suplexed onto Caprice and pinned him, resulting in new champions. Lee was dumbfounded by this and left the ring, leaving Whisper alone with the titles. The team that fans in the crowd here referred to as both “WhisperLee” and “Silent Kingdom” are now Tag Team Champions Who Can’t Get Along.

- Second intermission before the main event.

9. Dasher Hatfield beat Ophidian to retain the Chikara Grand Championship with a rolling elbow. This was Ophidian’s second shot at the title this year, earning his third point towards this title match on November 24th with a win over Tony Deppen. When ref Bryce Remsburg asked Ophidian before the match if he was ready to do this, Ophidian responded with, “I’m ready to actually earn this,” a shot at interim champion Hatfield. Good, competitive main event, with Ophidian getting a lot of offense in and getting increasingly aggressive in his attempt to win the title. He got a lot of momentum, including a near submission from the Cobra Clutch Death Grip, and a flipping piledriver right before Hatfield got the win.

- With Ophidian still laid out in the ring after the finish, Boomer came out to celebrate with his dad, as did the returning Mr. Touchdown. He said he was proud of Hatfield for what has now been four defenses of the Grand Championship on his behalf, and then revealed that as of December 10 (Monday), he will be cleared to return to the ring. Remsburg congratulated Touchdown and handed him back the Grand Championship, but Hatfield held onto it… and laid out Touchdown with an elbow! He acted like this was still his title. Boomer was at a loss and went to tend to Touchdown, but Dasher yelled at him to come to the back with him.

This troubling incident put a bow on a very fun season finale to Chikara’s year, which has been almost exclusive to the Wrestle Factory in Philadelphia. They will be back to touring more next year, with the earliest returns to the Wrestle Factory being March 16 for both stages of Young Lions Cup XV, and May 11 for The Infinite Gauntlet.

#Chikara #Chikara Pro #Wrestling #S19Finale

[carebear102279]

secrets

Sylvie and antonio were starting over. The feelings that they had, were still there. The sparks began again at the hospital. Their undeniable chemistry created fireworks. Both of them enjoyed reconnecting. But they were also trying to keep their new relationship a secret. Something they both were enjoying. Antonio had spent the night at sylvie's apartment. But with her roommates, definitely played into the trill of keeping secrets. Antonio woke up with sylvie in his arms. "Good morning baby." He kissed her head. Sylvie was running her hand over his chest. "Good morning antonio." Antonio "when do you gotta leave for work? Meaning when do cruz and otis leave?" Sylvie "you mean you want to know when you can sneak out? I could go ask them." Antonio stopped her by wrapping his arms around her. "That would be great babe, but you might want to take a look at your neck." Sylvie grabbed a mirror she kept at her bedside table. "Antonio Dawson, seriously?!?!" Antonio "Ssshhhhh babe. Unless you want to alert the guards." Sylvie "sorry. But antonio I work with your sister. I didn't leave any marks on your neck. But you might want to check your chest." Antonio took the mirror from her. "Well at least I can cover mine with a shirt. Look I'm sorry I gave you.....let's see 1,2,3,4,5 hickeys, on your neck." Antonio said with a smirk on his face. There was a knock at the door. Cruz "hey brett, we're leaving to run some errands before work. Do you want to ride with us?" Sylvie buried her head into antonio's chest to stop from laughing. Cruz "hey brett, are you awake?" Sylvie "ummm cruz, I'll drive myself to work. I need to take a shower first, that's if you and otis haven't used all the hot water." Cruz "no, there's hot water. See you at 51 brett." Sylvie looked out her window to check if they were leaving. Seeing them drive away "ok antonio they're gone." Antonio "well since eva was at a friends house last night. I brought a change of clothes for work. So we have time to take a shower, together?" Sylvie "well......since we've got to conserve on the hot water. But I get the water first." She kissed him, grabbed her robe and ran to the bathroom. Antonio chuckled to himself "whatever you say babe." Sylvie "smart man." After the shower antonio made breakfast. Since sylvie had to use makeup to cover up her hickeys on her neck. Sylvie walked out to the kitchen. "Well that took forever. Thanks for that antonio dawson." Antonio handed her a to go cup of coffee, kissed her "you're so welcome. I had to make sure to scare other men off." Sylvie "I'm not worried about other men. Your sister is my partner. She's already suspicious. Plus my roommates are on a mission, finding out who I may be seeing. Plus all this sneaking around is definitely hot." Antonio kissed her deeply "I don't want to leave. But you have to drive me to my car, if we're late people will definitely ask questions." Sylvie "ok fine. I just need to bring my concealer with, just in case. Next time your neck is mine." She planted kisses on his neck. Antonio moaned "ok babe now you're tormenting me." Sylvie "you love every second of this." Sylvie dropped antonio off at his car. They kissed each other. Antonio "text me when it's safe to call you." Sylvie "ok. Be safe today." Antonio kissed her one last time "you be safe today too." Antonio watched her drive away. The trill of them sneaking around, keeping secrets. Made him feel like a teenager again, with his first time in love. 'Love?' Ok he wasn't ready to admit these feelings. Sylvie arrived at work. Putting her things in her locker. Leaned against her locker, thinking about last night. God her love for that man. Wait, the L word again. She wasn't ready to admit to those feelings. Her phone beeped. It was antonio. "Hey babe, last night was amazing." Sylvie texted back "most definitely, last night was incredible." Gabby "hey sylvie, you're finally here." Sylvie jumped "Dam gabby you scared the hell out of me." Gabby "so, who are you texting?" Sylvie "no one important." Gabby "ok sure brett, whatever you say." Antonio had arrived at the station. He read sylvie's text message, which made him smile. Thinking about last night. Trudy "so antonio who has you looking this happy today?" Antonio was startled by trudy's questions " no one. It's just a nice day." Trudy "ok sure antonio." Antonio went upstairs to intelligence. It was going to be a long day. Knowing trudy, she wasn't going to let up. Plus she'll call mouch. Antonio sat at his desk, took out his phone. He sent sylvie a text. "Hey just wanted to let you know trudy is suspicious. You texted me, which made me smile. Trudy asked who had put a smile on my face. I'm thinking she's going to talk to mouch." Sylvie was coming back to 51 from a call, when her phone vibrated. Sylvie read the message "oh crap!" Gabby "something wrong?" Sylvie "ummm no. Just family stuff." Gabby "ok sylvie, ever since the whole thing with my dad. You've been acting weird, so is my brother. Now you want to tell me what the hell is going on." Sylvie "nothing is going on gabby. It was just weird seeing your brother." Gabby "ok, sure brett. Come to molly's tonight after work. I'm not taking no for an answer." Sylvie "ok, I'll go." Back at 51 sylvie was relaxing on the couch, when cruz sat down on one side. Otis sat down on the other side of sylvie. Sylvie "did you boys need something?" Cruz "so brett, are you seeing anyone lately?" Otis "what cruz means, who is your new boyfriend?" Cruz "hhhmmmm, tell us." Sylvie "Look we're roommates, friends. But I'm not seriously dating anyone. Look I am going to get ready to go home. I'll see you at molly's later." In her car sylvie texted antonio "hi, just wanted to let you know your sister insisted I go to molly's tonight. Plus I've been grilled by gabby, cruz and otis." Antonio "ok, maybe I'll see you at molly's later. Eva is at her mom's this weekend. I have off this weekend and I know you have off too." Sylvie called antonio from her car, the one place there weren't ears. Sylvie "just wanted to hear your voice." Antonio "well that's a good thing." Antonio had eyes on him at work. Rusek was looking at him with a grin on his face. Sylvie "about this weekend, well I'm all yours. Just remember your neck is mine." Antonio rubbed his neck. "Ok. I'll be leaving work soon. So I'll talk to you later. Sylvie "you have eyes on you." Antonio "yes." Sylvie "well I'll leave you with this thought. Clothing optional this weekend. See you later, at molly's?" Antonio "I'll be there." Antonio was getting uncomfortable sitting. Kim "ok antonio out with it, who was that?" Antonio "no one important." Kim "yah right, antonio. I know something is up. Do you have a new girlfriend?" Antonio "no I don't have a new girlfriend." Which technically wasn't a lie, after all sylvie wasn't a new girlfriend. "Look I'll see you at molly's later." Sylvie had put on a pair of antonio's favorite jeans. Then a sleeveless turtleneck. Plus a pair of her black boots. Along with a leather jacket. Her hair was done in soft curls. Arriving at molly's, she saw antonio was there already. Antonio saw sylvie walk in and sit down at the bar. Damn she knew exactly what she was doing to him. Sylvie "so I'm here gabby." Gabby winked at sylvie and then looked at her brother. "Ok sylvie drinks are on me tonight." Sylvie was sitting for about a half hour, she felt someone sit next to her. She looked over, it was Dr. Pete Calhoun. Pete " Sylvie, I just want to talk to you." Sylvie "I'm not interested, go home to your wife!" Pete "I thought we had a connection. Look my wife doesn't understand me." Sylvie "of course she doesn't. She doesn't know that you are an unfaithful jack ass!! So get the hell out of my bar, if you value your safety." Sylvie knew antonio was watching her. Gabby "so if it isn't Dr Sleezy." 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If you do you are going to have to deal with me, not just as a cop." Pete "so what the hell does that make you then!" Antonio looked at sylvie, sylvie nodded. Antonio put his arm around her. "Because sylvie is my girlfriend and I will protect her from whoever decides to hurt her. Now get the hell out of here, before your wife finds out the truth." Jay and Kelly threw him out of the bar. Gabby handed sylvie a cold wet washcloth. Antonio took it and gently applied it to her was. Antonio "are you ok?" Sylvie put her hand on his face "yes I'm ok. But my face is going to bruise." Antonio "well I'll be with you all weekend, so I'll take care of you." Cruz and otis came up to them, both of them smiling. Cruz "I knew it! Hurt her again and you are going to get hurt." Otis "same here." Sylvie "All right you both have made your point. So back off, I'm a big girl. I can make my own decisions." Gabby looked at both of them "Seriously you both didn't have me fooled. The only time I have seen you both this happy, was when you were together the first time. Although spare me any details, I don't need any nightmares." Antonio was looking at sylvie. Sylvie was looking at antonio. They both spoke at the same time, not looking at gabby "uh-huh sure gabby, whatever." Gabby "you two make me sick." She poured herself a shot. Antonio put down the washcloth, held her face gently. And kissed her softly right in front of everyone. She kissed him back. Antonio "you want to get out of here?" Sylvie smiled "lead the way. I'm all yours this weekend." Gabby "Seriously you two, yuck! Come on there are other people right here!" Antonio had his arm around sylvie as they walked out of molly's. "Antonio we'll get my car later. Just let me grab my bag." Antonio "sounds like a plan." He kissed her one more time before they drove away.

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From the Civil War to the football field, we have been celebrating the wrong values

Capt. Norwood Penrose Hallowell

Capt. Norwood Penrose Hallowell (Collection of the Massachusetts Historical Society)

Image without a caption

By

Sally Jenkins

Columnist

June 11, 2020 at 3:16 a.m. PDT

There are a half-dozen statues of Stonewall Jackson peering from pedestals, so tall he can see over three states. For a representation of Pen Hallowell, you can find only an archival photograph of a mildly handsome bearded young man in plain tunic, one hand holding a forage cap, the other resting lightly on a sword. Even in that, though, you can see his easy athleticism and his backbone.

It’s not really your fault if you don’t know who Hallowell was. His life and slim writings largely have been buried by “Gone With the Wind” nonsense. They should be revived and made required reading in locker rooms. Maybe then there wouldn’t be so many misconceptions about what constitute guts. Or such a romance with that over-glossed traitor Robert E. Lee and all the other Reb glorification that has haunted our sports fields, police stations, military bases and halls of justice.

American football always has been associated with warrior culture. We have fancied it trained young men to be good leaders, made “field generals” out of them, until it has become associated with what cultural historian Michael Oriard has called “a brand of flag-waving more like superpatriotism.” In truth, just like our statues and monuments, somehow we let the priorities become misplaced. The good teammate must show conformity and mindless allegiance rather than principle, keep his mouth shut and subsume himself and all of his personal colors and convictions in, say, team crimson. Instead of immortalizing Hallowell, we forgot him.

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Hallowell “was a power in Harvard athletics,” according to one of the earliest histories of football, who enlisted in the Union Army in 1861 just after graduating. But what you can be sure of is that he was a hell of a rower and a swimmer. During the Battle of Ball’s Bluff, the 22-year-old swam across the Potomac River three times through bullet-pocked water to rescue trapped and wounded comrades. You can get an additional idea of Hallowell’s virtuosity from the fact that his son Jack was a two-time all-American end in football and his grandson Norwood Penrose III was a runner who finished sixth in the 1,500 meters at the 1932 Summer Olympics before serving aboard warships in World War II.

Jerry Brewer: Black and white teammates know: Conflict is inevitable; winners confront it

Pen Hallowell had something more than physical courage, and so did his elder brother, Edward “Ned” Needles Hallowell. “The Fighting Quakers,” as they were nicknamed, were sons of a Philadelphia abolitionist whose home was a stop on the Underground Railroad. As boys they spirited fugitive slaves to safety in the family carriage. As men they volunteered as officers with the legendary all-black 54th and 55th Massachusetts regiments.

As for Ned Hallowell, he was shot three times charging with the left wing of the martyred 54th Massachusetts at Fort Wagner, just behind his doomed friend Robert Gould Shaw. With Shaw’s body lying in a sandy ditch with his troops, Ned Hallowell assumed command of the regiment. Assigned the rear guard during a perilous retreat in a battle called Olustee, he and his men spent 20,000 cartridges checking the Confederates and then countermarched to save a train of intermingled black and white wounded soldiers that had broken down. When they couldn’t fix the motor, they attached ropes to the engine cars and manually hauled that bloody train to safety, with Confederate gunfire guttering at their backs.

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While those men were towing a locomotive by ropes, Pen Hallowell was beating in the doors of Congress trying to get them paid equal to white soldiers. The 54th and 55th were offered just $7 a month, while white soldiers got $13. Largely thanks to the brothers’ efforts, Congress finally approved equal pay for black soldiers in 1864.

Why bring any of this up? Because it’s an example of what black-white alliances can do, for one thing. Because Sunday is Flag Day, for another. And because every well-meaning but unread white athlete, coach, owner, athletic director and sportswriter needs to understand that Pen Hallowell, to whom black lives really did matter, lost his war. And football had no small part in that.

The vague phrase “systemic racism” is not just perpetuated by men with badges. It’s also propagated by our false victory narratives. There have been few more powerful cultural narrators than the NFL and the NCAA, with their close association with military triumphalism. They have been terrible teachers of historical truth, lousy with misplaced definitions of valor. Pen Hallowell was alive to hear Harvard football coach W. Cameron Forbes declare in 1900 that American football was “the expression of strength of the Anglo-Saxon. It is the dominant spirit of the dominant race, and to this it owes its popularity and its hope of permanence.”

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Steve Kerr believes Colin Kaepernick will ‘ultimately be considered a hero’ for protests

Then there was that Princeton academic and assistant football coach named Woodrow Wilson, who rewrote the Civil War in volumes of purported American history so racist that they enraged Hallowell because they so “abounded with apologies for slavery.”

Hallowell tried to fight back in the post-war battle of values. He wrote essays and speeches devoted to the bravery of black soldiers and those conscientious outliers, abolitionists. On Memorial Day in 1896, he gave a remembrance address at Harvard. Sickened by romantic war myths in which the treachery and slave-driving of the Confederacy were painted over as cavalier spirit, Hallowell said, “To ignore the irreconcilable distinction between the cause of the North and that of the South is to degrade the war.”

Yet isn’t that what we have done? We have degraded that war — to the point that we hardly know what real honor is anymore, much less how to coach it on our playing fields. Degraded it until Colin Kaepernick was reviled for a simple show of conscience on racism. Degraded it until racial justice and the flag seemed in such conflict that a decent man such as Drew Brees couldn’t think clearly and make a clean judgment. Degraded it to the point that Pen Hallowell has faded to a relative obscurity, except among war buffs and historians, while the University of Mississippi kept Colonel Reb as a mascot until 2003. Even now frat boys will dress in the costumes of traitors to the flag at cotillions, without the first blush of hot shame.

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Thomas Boswell: It’s not which sports figures are speaking out that’s telling. It’s how many.

It’s the 21st century, yet 85 percent of the authorities in the Football Bowl Subdivision, the coaches, athletic directors, chancellors, presidents and conference commissioners who run it, are white. So are 28 of the NFL’s 32 head coaches. Almost all of them say they are trying to figure out how to “support” black players. As they filter back to their campuses and team facilities, there are a lot of hard conversations about race and patriotism. Whether to emulate the bent knee of Kaepernick in protest. Whether to support Deshaun Watson and DeAndre Hopkins in their quest to efface John C. Calhoun, who called slavery “a positive good,” from Clemson’s campus.

If we want football to be something worth preserving, we should demand that it celebrates the right qualities — and people.

Here’s a helpful suggestion to the coaches: Try reading a little Hallowell on the subject of what it is to really fight for each other. In the slim volumes produced by that genuine patriot and war hero are some things that may surprise them. For instance, Nick Saban and his Alabama players probably don’t know that after the war Hallowell helped finance a private school for black students in Calhoun, Ala., with Booker T. Washington.

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But most important is what Hallowell has to teach about courage and protest. “The courage necessary to face death in battle is not of the highest order,” Hallowell wrote. He saw a “higher and rarer courage” in the “long suffering and patient endurance” of the soldiers so invested in their equal pay protest that they fought for 18 months without accepting a cent until they won fair treatment.

Hallowell and his brother are buried in Mount Auburn Cemetery in Cambridge, Mass., with headstones so small they seem like chips compared with Confederate monuments. When Hallowell finally died in 1914, his close friend and compatriot Oliver Wendell Holmes Jr. called him “the most generously gallant spirit, and I don’t know but the greatest soul I ever knew.” If there was a peerless man who deserves to be on a height, it’s Pen Hallowell. Yet look what we have done to him. Look what we have done to all of us.

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Sally Jenkins

Sally Jenkins is a sports columnist for The Washington Post. She began her second stint at The Washington Post in 2000 after spending the previous decade working as a book author and as a magazine writer.

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[junker-town]

Ask a Tennessee fan: Why the hell have the Vols always wanted Jon Gruden so badly?

He won a Super Bowl a while back and has some minor connections, but does that explain Knoxville’s decade of obsession?

I love a good GRUMOR as much as the next guy. For the uninitiated, that’s basically any shred of information that even tangentially connects the Vols to former Tampa Bay Bucs coach Jon Gruden.

Jon Gruden, a noted Super Bowl champion, has long been Tennessee’s fever dream of a head coach. But the question I have about the years-long Gruden saga is: why him?

Tennessee’s very public courting of Gruden seems like chasing forbidden fruit. This carrot at the end of the stick will bring the program back to relevance. But when you look into it just a touch deeper than the obvious, Tennessee’s problem is the rest of the SEC’s problem.

First, let’s explain the connection.

Let’s be clear. This is the tangible link between Jon Gruden and Tennessee:

Did you know Jon Gruden's wife Cindy is a former Tennessee cheerleader: http://pic.twitter.com/RgseMCQoOn

— SI Vault (@si_vault) October 3, 2017

He was also a graduate assistant there 30 years and 11 jobs ago.

So throughout the last few years, whenever the Tennessee job opens, Gruden’s name is brought up.

2008: Gruden says taking Tennessee job isn't in his future, by ESPN.

2010: Jon Gruden turns down Tennessee's advances, by the Sporting News.

2012: Jon Gruden tells Vols he's not interested in coaching position, by CBS Sports. Gruden's agent calls the entire Gruden-to-Vols rumor-industrial complex "just a fantasy world."

The end of his tenure in Tampa back in 2008 became the catalyst for all the GRUMORS, since that season was Phillip Fulmer’s last in charge as well. Tennessee hired Lane Kiffin, who moonlighted for almost a year before leaving, then had three years of terrible football under Derek Dooley.

There’s an argument that Gruden won that title with Tony Dungy’s players, but I digress. Gruden has hoisted a Lombardi Trophy, and it is an achievement that deserves kudos.

I went to the source to find out the deep-seated root of the GRUMORS.

Terry Lambert, the editor of SB Nation’s Tennessee blog, Rocky Top Talk (which maintains an extensive timeline of years and years of GRUMORS), gave me some interesting details from inside the Vols’ fan base.

“Alabama, Tennessee's biggest rival, returned to powerhouse status with one single home run hire,” Lambert told me. “Tennessee has gotten it wrong three straight times. Fans are craving that ‘Saban moment’ hire. A lot of fans believe Jon Gruden is Tennessee's Saban.

“The Gruden-UT connections are obvious. Fans know that Tennessee has the money and boosters to make it happen. They just want to see the school swing for the fences, for once.”

That’s a symptom of the Alabama disease infecting most of the SEC. It was particularly poignant at LSU, which basically fired Les Miles because he couldn’t get over the Alabama hump. It led Florida and Georgia to hire former Saban assistants as head coaches. The Gators have done it twice, with disastrous results each time. The Bulldogs apparently landed the right one in Kirby Smart.

But does our man on the ground actually want Gruden?

“Yes,” Lambert said. “Look, he's never [been a head coach] in college. He's never recruited. He's been out of the coaching game for a decade. I get all of that.

“But does anyone really think that Jon Gruden would struggle to pull talent to Knoxville? I think he'd kill it in that area. I'd guess he'd assemble a pretty potent staff, too. When you stack all of these candidates up, nobody really moves the needle for me like Gruden does.”

That recruiting thing isn’t conjecture.

That’s what Gruden’s actually said, multiple times.

“Too many rules, man. I mean I like to work. I don’t like to be working 15 hours a week with players. The recruiting, Facebook, texting, e-mails – all that stuff. Yeah, I’d probably have you in real deep, deep trouble if I was your college coach.”

Look, I get that as a head coach you aren’t tasked with doing as much recruiting as your assistants, but this is a big issue, if sincere. Talent isn’t as readily available in the state as it is elsewhere in the conference. It is basically the SEC’s Nebraska.

And Jones’ improved recruiting is already slipping. Five-star OT Cade Mays, who happens to be a Knoxville native and UT legacy, decommitted on Tuesday.

So why would the Vols believe Gruden will change his mind this time?

He’s been publicly teasing them, for one thing, showing up at a game (while in the area for work anyway) and taking selfies with former players.

Reddit came in hot with a new example of the kind of “Gruden real estate” rumor that’s been an internet staple for years:

Friend’s Uncle is a real estate agent who is tight with the agent the Gruden’s use. They’ve been looking for a while for area home bc Cindy knows her parents are getting older, and she wants somewhere to go to be close to them. Yes they also own Jeff County land. There is some intel that properties they looked at are too expensive for a college JR to live in, and an offer may be in the works.

Alums like Paul Finebaum and Albert Haynesworth also got the rumor mills churning.

I wouldn’t bet my bottom dollar on this but this is what I’m hearing! #VFLthruthick http://pic.twitter.com/UGjBzMrFEz

— Albert Haynesworth (@haynesworthiii) October 30, 2017

Amid all the chatter, betting markets started pointing Gruden’s way as well.

I can confirm. Gruden went from off the board, to 20-1, dropped to 18-1 two weeks ago....... now at 12-1 on bet online https://t.co/CW7Sb1YOau

— Jon Reed (@Jon__Reed) October 19, 2017

At the time of this writing, there were no less than six Jon Gruden threads on the first page of Tennessee’s 247Sports forums. The headings include:

But is it even about Gruden anymore?

Have the GRUMORS reached such a fever pitch in a success-starved fan base that any big name will do at this point?

“Both Butch and Dooley were reportedly the fourth or fifth option at the time,” Lambert said. “Tennessee got turned down by the likes of Charlie Strong, Kyle Wittingham, Troy Calhoun, and David Cutcliffe. That shouldn't be the case this time around.”

But if Tennessee actually gets Gruden, what in the world would that actually look like?

This is kinda like what happens when a dog catches its tail.

“All of this kind of feels like the Jim Harbaugh situation with Michigan to me. There seems to be a segment of the media saying that Gruden would never even consider Tennessee, yet the fans have stayed firm in their belief all along,” Lambert said. “If it happens, Vol Twitter will be absolutely unbearable for anyone that isn't a Tennessee fan.

“If people thought the hype was bad in 2015 and 2016, just wait to see what it looks like with Gruden running the show.”

Now I absolutely want Jon Gruden to get hired at Tennessee.

[iamchikara]

Results for both stages of the YLC doubleheader under the cut.

FIRST STAGE Match #1: YLC Elimination Four-Way #1 Boomer Hatfield vs. Lee Moriarty vs. Jay Sorbet vs. Bla...uh... Blanche was recently injured and had to withdraw from this match, necessitating the drawing of names to replace. Human Tornado (that’s a name I haven’t heard in a while) was #1, of course he wasn’t in the building. Neither were Hurricane Helms (#2) or Roman Reigns (#4). #3 was Sonny DeFarge, but of course he had a match later. The fifth draw turned out to be the lucky one, as Lady Frost (who has been making the indie rounds lately and has some of the nicest ring gear I’ve seen in recent times) got the nod as the replacement. So let’s try this again! Match #1: YLC Elimination Four-Way #1 Boomer Hatfield vs. Lee Moriarty vs. Jay Sorbet vs. Lady Frost Jay Sorbet apparently sings “That’s a-Sorbet” before dropping an elbow. He’ll fit in just fine, I think. Moriarty, who wasn’t s’posed to be in this either (he replaced the previously announced Jaden Való) had quite the showcase, as he eliminated Sorbet and Frost within seconds of each other. Unfortunately, he wasn’t quite able to get the job done, and Boomer utilized the Heidicanrana to win the match. Post-match, Scott Holladay tried to interview Boomer and ask about his recent family issues, leading to Dasher Hatfield crashing the interview and scolding Scott for not focusing on Boomer’s win. Boomer himself never got to say a word. WINNER: Boomer Hatfield Match #2: Trios Contest The Regime vs. Arm Wringer Amir, Enzuigiri Evan, and Headbutt Hari Juan Francisco de Coronado’s bad karma has been catching up to him lately. Last month, he was booted from Ecuador due to tax evasion, and this month, well... Apparently dude hasn’t been paying the Closers for their services too well, as, instead of following his instructions to maul the three new debuting masked guys, they decided to inform him of his delinquent payment status. They wanted their payment in full. Of course, it wasn’t provided, so they ordered their opponents out of the ring and proceeded to completely destroy JFDC instead. Always remember to pay your hired goons, people. NO CONTEST Match #3: YLC Elimination Four-Way #2 Frantik vs. Thief Ant vs. Air Wolf vs. Jaden Newman A sneaky pin by Thief surprised rival Frantik, sending him out of the match first. However, it was Newman who made his mark on the match, eliminating first tournament favorite Air Wolf and then Thief with a knockout elbow referred to as “First to Last” to punch his ticket to the semis. WINNER: Jaden Newman Match #4: Singles Contest Missile Assault Man (1 point) vs. Rory Gulak I’m told Missile didn’t have too much trouble with Rory and was able to secure his second point. WINNER: Missile Assault Man (2 points) INTERMISSION Match #5: Singles Match, Unsanctioned Chain Match Lucas Calhoun vs. Volgar As this has been deemed an unsanctioned match, unless I’m informed otherwise after this has been written/posted, Calhoun’s points are not on the line. Accordingly, there was no referee and no commentary, with those in attendance providing a ten count to answer to. (I really don’t think that last part is how a chain match actually works, but hey.) As expected, it was a big brawl, with Calhoun getting the win via the super Samoan drop after smashing a bottle over Volgar’s head. WINNER: Lucas Calhoun Match #6: YLC Elimination Four-Way #3 DL Hurst vs. Davienne vs. Cam Carter vs. Still Life Davienne was out first, tapping out to a submission from Hurst. Carter, another huge favorite in the tournament, eliminated Hurst next, but missed a 450 splash on Still Life and was rolled up for the shock elimination. Scott Holladay caught up to Still Life post-match, but they (Still Life uses they/them pronouns, guess art doesn’t have any kind of gender?) refused to answer Holladay’s question regarding BLANK having a new muse (alluding to BLANK’s recent obsession with Penelope Ford). WINNER: Still Life Match #7: YLC Elimination Four-Way #4 Allie Kat vs. Brayden Lee vs. Ricky South vs. Green Ant Green refused to give Kat belly scratches, but did scratch her behind the ear. South was more than willing to give belly scratches, though he gave Lee them instead. Kat, another big favorite, was eliminated first by Green, prompting the crowd to boo him pretty heavily. South impressed during the match, at one point hitting a double northern lights suplex on Lee and Green. It was Lee who pulled out the shock elimination midway through, sending Green out of the tournament after a sequence that saw him hit a modified Michinoku driver on Green, hurricanrana South off the top down onto him, then finish him off with a shooting star press. That sounds nuts, IMO. Unfortunately for Lee, he couldn’t keep that momentum going, and South finished him with a super piledriver. WINNER: Ricky South Match #8: MAIN EVENT Singles Contest Mark Angelosetti (1 point) vs. Chris Dickinson (1 point) These two came in hot and quickly threw down. Dickinson made a point of targeting Touchdown’s leg, and nearly got himself DQ’d for bullying Bryce Remsburg. (Yes, he’s been an utter idiot as DoF, but you just don’t bully referees.) Touchdown was able to hit the Flea Flicker to end it. WINNER: Mark Angelosetti (2 points), Chris Dickinson is out of the standings Post-match, Dasher and Boomer hit the ring, as Dasher had a third opponent “from the Dugout” already lined up for Touchdown on the second half. Bryce tried to mediate the mess he helped cause, but was figuratively steamrolled by Dasher and Touchdown agreed to the match anyway. SECOND STAGE Match #1: YLC Semifinal #1 Boomer Hatfield vs. Jaden Newman Utilizing the Heidicanrana once again, Boomer punched his ticket to the finals at Newman’s expense. WINNER: Boomer Hatfield Match #2: YLC Semifinal #2 Still Life vs. Ricky South South attempted to hit the super piledriver that got him to the semis, but Still Life reversed that in midair and turned it into a jackknife pin to end the match. WINNER: Still Life Match #3: Singles Contest, MAGIC MOVE (450 Splash) Cam Carter vs. Air Wolf While Carter pulled out the 450 again and thus scored the crowd something that was hopefully nice, Wolf was able to win the match with an arm capture brainbuster. Man, Carter just couldn’t catch a break. WINNER: Air Wolf (1 point) Match #4: Trios Contest The Colony (Fire, Worker, and Thief Ant) vs. the Creatures of the Deep (Hermit Crab, Cajun Crawdad, and Merlok) This was originally advertised as a tag contest. Guess the Queen thought the crustaceans would have issues and sent the big fish. At one point, Crawdad hung from the ceiling before launching himself down onto everyone, which sounds pretty nuts. Fire secured the win for his team, pinning Crawdad after the Beach Break. WINNERS: The Colony Match #5: Tag Contest Cornelius Crummels and Sonny DeFarge vs. F.I.S.T. (Travis Huckabee and Tony Deppen) (2 points) Deppen wanted to jump Crummels and DeFarge before the match even started, but Huckabee prevented him from doing so. Everyone shook hands and immediately doublecrossed each other, leading to something of a mirror match for a bit as both teams evidently read the same rudo playbook. As this match was rudo/rudo, the crowd ended up kicking up a “Let’s Go No One” chant instead of picking a side. Utilizing a double stomp/stretch muffler combination, F.I.S.T. picked up the win and their third point. WINNERS: Travis Huckabee and Tony Deppen (3 points) Match #6: Grand Championship Defense #5 Dasher Hatfield vs. Solo Darling Both competitors brought their best, both dishing it out and taking it. Solo even kicked out of a jackhammer after a double stomp...at 1. If that doesn’t prove she’s tough as all getout, I don’t think anything will. Dasher was finally able to put her down with an Oklahoma Stampede. WINNER: Dasher Hatfield Match #7: YLC Finals Still Life vs. Boomer Hatfield Boomer injured his knee early on, hampering his ability to get the job done. Still Life took full advantage of that, as well they should, and was able to get the victory and the cup via the Venus Fly Trap figure four. Post-match, Scott Holladay once again attempted to speak to Still Life, only for BLANK to appear. He addressed Penelope Ford, saying that she ruined his masterpiece last month, and he couldn’t unsee that no matter what he did. He then leaves. (I am not sure where this one’s going...) WINNER and YLC XV HOLDER: Still Life This year’s King of Trios is announced! It’s going to be on October 4-6 (good on them for moving it so that it didn’t clash with BOLA) and in Reading, PA. Tickets went on sale today. Match #8: MAIN EVENT Singles Contest Mark Angelosetti (2 points) vs... As Dasher said he had someone lined up “from the Dugout”, there’s only one person this could be, and it is indeed Icarus, who is going into the match with one point. Touchdown and Dasher’s hitman threw down, with Ick trying to get the killshot early with the Blu-Ray, only for Touchdown to kick out. The way this match sounded, it’s a wonder Touchdown wasn’t injured again during it. Unfortunately, Ick couldn’t finish the rightful Grand Champion off, and Touchdown punched his ticket to a showdown via an Oklahoma roll. Post-match, Ick went to pick up Touchdown, only for Dasher to intervene...and inform him that he had one job and he failed, before letting Ick pick up Touchdown and hit the Blu-Ray again. “Mark, earning three points does NOT make you a champ.” DoF Remsburg attempted to intervene as well and take back the title, but was again shut down. Touchdown attempted to plead with Dasher, only to be laid out with the title. “I worked too hard. It’s mine and I’m keeping it.” At this point, Bryce finally decided to try to curtail the mess he helped cause and give us what should’ve been done from the getgo: a proper match between Dasher and Touchdown, making a ladder match for April 5th to decide the undisputed Grand Champion. He also announced that as his final act as DoF, marking an end to his much-criticized tenure in the position. WINNER: Mark Angelosetti (3 points), Icarus is out of the standings

#CHIKARA #YLC XV #YLC '19 #Results