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hazyheel · 5 years

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WWE Monday Night Raw 9/16/19 Review

Well, this episode was certainly bad. There was a whole bunch of stupid soap opera stuff in the middle that honestly made this show feel like a cold shit. I normally say that Raw was decent or fine or boring, but I can safely say that this was a real bad one. But it wasn’t without it’s diamonds in the rough. So, if you’re willing to swim through the crap that is the rest of my review, then here it is. If you’re not, then Corey Graves would call you a beta cuck.

Seth Rollins Promo: Rollins came on out and recapped Clash of Champions. He said that it was neither his nor Strowman’s fault for losing the Raw Tag Team Championships. Then he put Strowman over hard by describing how much it took to keep him down. He then talked about how the Fiend attacked him, and officially accepted his challenge for Hell in a Cell. Wyatt then came on the Titantron, in his usual creepy Firefly Funhouse. Rollins told him that he was messed up and needed help, when Ramblin Rabbit told Rollins that he didn’t know what he was dealing with, and told him to run, before Wyatt punched him. Wyatt then told Rollins that the Fiend does not forget anyone, and maybe he will appear again tonight. As Wyatt signed off, and said “see you in hell.” The music continued to play.

Grade: B+. I thought this was just shy of great. I loved the inclusion of Ramblin Rabbit, whose storyline I’m honestly more invested in than the Kevin Owens/ Shane McMahon feud. Wyatt was perfectly creepy and threatening, and Rollins looked genuinely concerned about someone attacking him from behind. Rollins is treating Wyatt like a threat, and it was awesome. The more he is treated like a monster, the more he will be perceived as one. If they keep this up, this will be a great feud. Highlight of the night.

Also, before the next segment, they ran down the card for later on, but the graphics were upside down the entire time. Renee Young pointed it out, which was funny.

Braun Strowman interview: Strowman said that the only reason he was here was that he was pissed, and would beat up whoever was in in the ring next.

Dolph Ziggler & Robert Roode promo: I guess this was some sort of a summit, because the Revival showed up right away as well. Roode put himself and Ziggler over for winning the tag team championships so soon after becoming a team. However, as they were talking, Braun Strowman came out. The Revival attacked him in the aisle, but he tossed them around with ease. Stromwan then cleared the ring. Roode was actually able to get out of the way unscathed.

Grade: C. I wasn’t a huge fan of this, because I don’t see what it did. I still don’t know where Strowman will go from here, and he beat down three of the four tag team champions. In terms of action it was fine and kinda exciting, but I don’t really know where this is going. I’m not going to rate it lower because this could be the start of the story, but right now I don’t know what is happening.

Alexa Bliss & Nikki Cross backstage: They kinda made fun of both Mandy Rose and Sasha Banks. They then put over their tag team titles, and said that they are very important, sorta as a counter to Banks crapping all over them a few weeks ago. That was it.

Cedric Alexander & The Viking Raiders vs. The OC: AJ Styles started things out with Alexander, and the two layed into each other in the corner right then the match started. Alexander tagged in Erik, who kneed Styles in the face, before Styles tagged out to Karl Anderson. The Viking Raiders then teamed up on him a bit, but Luke Gallows quickly tagged in to duel with Erik. Erik was then beaten down by the OC after Styles threw him into the barricade. Ivar got the hot tag after the commercial break and beat down the whole OC. Alexander then nailed a springboard clothesline to Anderson for a near fall. However, Styles then tagged in, nailed him with the Phenomenal forearm to win the match.

After the match, the OC continued the attack. Ivar destroyed Anderson, Gallows and Erik with a senton off the top. Styles then went for something on Alexander off the top, but Alexander met him there. Alexander went for a rana, but Styles caught him and nailed the Styles Clash off the second rope.

Grade: C+. Fine match with fine action. But this didn’t really forward much of a storyline other than the Viking Raiders vs. The Good Brothers, which will have to happen eventually. Styles pinned Alexander again, so that feud is done, and we will need a new challenger for Styles. But this match didn’t really do a bunch for me and was too short to really get going. It ended as it was picking up, so not awesome.

24/7 shenanigans: Truth and Carmella visited the Women’s basketball hall of fame. Truth joked a bunch, it was funny. Then Kane showed up, because they are in Tennessee. They joked about it, but turns out Kane wasn’t in character. He just called himself Glenn Jacobs, and offered Truth a tour around. This is not over!

Baron Corbin vs. Chad Gable in the finals of the 2019 King of the Ring: this was done up all pretty with official announcing and such, but it was still on in the first hour. As things started up, Gable tried to go for some technical exchanges, which Corbin was having none of. Gable eventually forced his way to the mat, and tried to power up Corbin for some suplexes, but he couldn’t get him up and took control away. The two fought to the outside, and Gable charged at Corbin, only to eat a huge back body drop into the timekeeper’s area. When we came back to the ring, Gable barely beat a countout. Corbin continued to absolutely destroyed Gable with strikes, including a huge big boot to stifle a comeback. At one point, Gable locked in an armbar over the ropes, but Gable just picked him up and powerbombed him back into the ring. Gable did a great job of selling the fact that he was desperate, and at one point was able to pick the ankle, only for Corbin to post himself. Gable then followed up with a missile dropkick, and several running flip kicks, until Corbin popped him up into a slam for a near fall. Corbin then took the fight to the outside, where Gable dodged a shoulder tackle that sent Corbin into the steel steps. Gable then rolled Corbin into the ring and started to target the leg a bit, only for Corbin to stop him dead in his tracks with a deep six for a near fall. Corbin then went for his around the post clothesline, but Gable dodged it and nailed the Chaos Theory, only for Corbin to kick out. They then scrambled a bit, with Gable baely able to pick the ankle. There was a tense submission sequece, with table even locking up the leg, only for Corbin to still force the break. They then battled a bit in the corner, and Gable went for a running flip kick again, only for Corbin to twirl him around his body and hit the End of Days for the win.

After the match, Corbin posed near the throne. They didn’t even give him time to put on the props.

Grade: B. It almost made it to a B+, but I couldn’t get it there. There wasn’t enough back and forth early on in the match for it to get there, but the finish was really really good. Gable had just enough comebacks to keep things interesting. Corbin beat him down at every turn, so those moments when he nearly won were really good. The Chaos Theory looked awesome, and the ankle lock actually got me a bit. And of course that tilt a whirl finish looked super cool, so I can’t complain. Corbin did a good job in this tournament, so all hail King Corbin.

Maria Kanellis Gender Reveal party: The Street Profits were hosting this for some reason. Maria said it was a boy, and then that it was Ricochet’s. Ricochet did some sitcom BS to not actually confirm that the kid isn’t his. Mike Kanellis slapped him and challenged him to a match. Then Titus O’Neil and the Street Profits made a bunch of sex jokes. This was stupid but kinda funny.

Mike Kanellis vs. Ricochet: Ricochet was a bit apprehensive about fighting Kanellis, but Kanellis insisted. Ricochet then beat him down with all of his signature offense and won with Recoil.

Grade: D+. What was this? Why Was this? Who decided they should do this? And for a nothing filler match? They could’ve taken the time from the party and added it to the match to give them some time for a nice match. I’m giving this a pretty low grade, but no F or anything because I did think it was kinda funny, although ultimately pointless. Ricochet is a dad, and I’m sure Kacy Catanzaro is thrilled.

Firefly Funhouse: Bray Wyatt put up pictures of all the people that he destroyed as the Fiend, and then left the Funhouse. Ominous.

Maria Kanellis being mean to Mike: After the commercial, Maria came out and yelled at Mike a whole bunch in an attempt to motivate him. She said that Ricochet wasn’t the father, but it was Rusev. So this was Rusev’s big return. Mike tried to stop him from beating his ass, and just congratulated him and tried to run away. Rusev ran him down and kicked his ass. Also, Corey Graves called Kanellis a beta cuck.

Mike Kanellis vs. Rusev: Rusev hit the Machka kick, and tapped Kanellis out to the Acolayde. During this time, Michael Cole was being a dick to Renee Young about her mentioning the match was underway, and she said she was mansplaining.

Grade: F. Yeah, this was only funny because the commentators had to talk about this as it was happening. Rusev is married, which is something that they actually mentioned on commentary, and this is the worst story for him to come back to. Why did Mike need to lose twice? Ugh, I hope to God he goes back down to NXT, because while this was funny all around him, all the stuff with him in it was just sad. Even Michael Cole called him a loser. This is bad

24/7 Shenanigans cont: Truth and Jacobs visited a football stadium. They talked a bit, and Truth was being dumb and weird. A cop then popped up, but turns out he was a ref. Truth tried to run away, and ran right into the goal post. Glenn Jacobs pinned him and won the championship. Pretty funny, but this was a crazy ass second hour.

Rey Mysterio vs. Cesaro: Before the match started, Cesaero crapped on Mysterio’s kid, and they brawled a bit. Cesaro was absolutely beating down Mysterio for a while after showing some great offense, and we cut to commercial in the middle of it. Cesaro continued to destroy Rey, and at one time caught Mysterio out of a 619 and dropped Mysterio on his knee for a near fall. Mysterio then hit the 619, and tried for a flying rana to close things out, but Cesaro caught him, only for Mysterio to hit a sunset flip powerbomb for the win.

Grade: B-. Above average B- match, but there wasn’t a lot of back and forth for me. The action was still good enough to be a positive, but I was mostly just happy to have a good match after all that crap.

Firefly Funhouse again: Bray put up Rollins’ picture, and things were creepy.

AOP Video Package: It’s sure as hell been a while since they’ve been shown on TV. They demanded competition, called the WWE Tag Division soft, and threatened to take the opportunities that were owed to them. They need a mouthpiece.

Alexa Bliss & Nikki Cross vs. Bayley & Sasha Banks: Bayley and Bliss started things out, and Bliss quickly took control by giving Bayley and Banks a somersault sneton to the outisde, seeming to irritate her leg. Cross soon tagged in and got beat up. As she was about to tag Bliss, Bayly dragged Bliss off the apron and started to viciously assault her leg. Bliss looked to be very hurt, but then they cut to commercial. As we came back from commercial, Cross was desperately fighting a two on battle, and looking pretty good as she did. She was absolutely wild in her offense, and was actually able to beat down the champions by herself for a bit. Bayley fought back against her foe, but Cross refused to let up. Cross even hit a hangman’s swinging neckbreaker on Bayley, but Banks broke it up. Banks then tagged herself in and locked in the Bank Statement for the win.

After the match, Banks was going to beat down Cross with a chair, but Becky Lynch ran down to make the save. Her and Banks fought with the chairs, until Bayley ran in to help Banks. Charlotte then showed up, and Bayley ran at her, only to eat a big boot and some chair shots. Back in the ring, Lynch gave Banks some chair shots, and Charlotte and Lynch stood tall together, but warily.

Grade: C. This was an odd match, with Bliss being carted out in the middle for an injury that may or may not be legit. But Cross looked pretty good fighting alone, but it was pretty much just a random match to give Lynch someone to save. Also, if the Boss n’ Hug connection don’t get a match for the Tag Team Titles, then I will riot. They beat the champions, they get a shot.

Sasha Banks Backstage: She just said that she challenges Lynch to a rematch at Hell in Cell. They didn’t confirm the stip, but it’ll probably be a Hell in a Cell.

24/7 Shenanigans: Glenn Jacobs got out of a limo, and Truth hopped off the top of the limo and pinned him. Then they talked about how Monday Night Raw was Jacobs’ home, and they walked in together.

Becky Lynch backstage: Lynch said that Banks wanted a fight, but she wasn’t willing to step her game up. So Lynch escalated things, and challenged her to a Hell in a Cell match. Super into this, very excited.

Lacy Evans vs. Dana Brooke: Evans attacked before the bell, which made Brooke super mad so they beat into each other. Evans quickly fought back into the match and hit some of her signature offense. Evans quickly hit the Woman’s Right, but she didn’t make the pin. Instead, she locked in the sharpshooter, and called out Natalya as she did. Brooke tapped out.

Grade: C+. Squash squash squash. Loved to see Brooke though!

Robert Roode vs. Seth Rollins: The two started out with some chain wrestling, before picking things up. Rollins destroyed Roode with a series of fast paced strikes and kicks, but Roode took him down with a vicious knee to the gut. At one point, Rollins was going to go for a suicide dive, but Ziggler hopped up on the apron to stop him. However, that didn’t half Rollins’ momentum, until Roode gave Rollins a forearm to the outside, and then Ziggler hit him with one of his own to give Roode control. Roode continued to maintain control, until Rollins countered a spinebuster into a Falcon Arrow for a near fall. In the finish, Rollins slipped out of a superplex to deliver a buckle bomb, superkick to the stomach, and then a stomp, only for Ziggler to break it up and give Rollins the win by DQ.

Rollins and Ziggler brawled after the match, when the OC all ran down to help in the beatdown. He ate a magic killer, a Styles Clash and a Superkick. Then they continued to stomp on him, but Kane came out and beat everyone down. He gave Gallows and Anderson and Styles chokeslams. But after he cleared the ring, the lights slowly went out, the Fiend showed up once again and took Kane down with the mandible claw. Then he cradled a basically unconscious Rollins. The show ended with a demonic and long rendition of the Firefly Fun House song.

Grade: B. The match was good, not really spectacular. But the post match beatdown was fun, and Bray Wyatt showing up to beat down Kane was great. This is what should’ve happened last week with Austin and Taker. Cradling Rolllins was super creepy, and then a rendition of the Firefly Fun House Song to close it out. A hell of a way to close out Raw.

Overall Grade: C

Pros: opening promo; KOTR final; main event

Cons: Random Strowman attack; all the baby stuff; women’s tag;

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