#Rjalker does crochet

[rjalker]

The snakes took me around 8 hours to make

My mom wants me to sell them for $20.

How much is that per hour so I can explain how criminally absurd that is.

(edit: that would be paying me only $2.5/hour. Absurd)

That doesn't even include the yarn and filling. The canna lily seeds were all harvested and cleaned by hand too.

#Rjalker does crochet

[rjalker]

Lol mom is trying to pressure me to lower the prices for my crochet things. No, mother, I am not selling a bag it took me 5 hours to make for $10. That's not how handmade things work. If people don't want to buy them for the prices I have set so I am actually getting paid for my time and effort, then they don't buy them. I'm not lowering my prices, that's literally just going to further devalue handmade items.

#Rjalker does crochet

[rjalker]

Will attempt this tomorrow (feel free to use). It's supposed to be a crochet pattern.

[ID: Two digital images showing an uneven, digitally handdrawn grid. The second version is blank, the first has a watermelon slice drawn on it, with "resist" written below. End ID.]

if I succeed it'll get hung in a window if I can make sure the cats can't just immediately pull it down like they keep doing to our pride flag...

#described images #Rjalker does crochet #free Palestine

[rjalker]

Made with speech to text. If there's giant massive typos please let me know lol.

If you can crochet or knit a rectangle you can make a cat-ear hat!

[Image description start. A photo of two crochet rectangles sitting on top of my box on a sofa. One is solid royal purple, The other is striped in brown and black. Image description end.]

The purple one I made a few months ago and made taller so that it could be folded up or down by the wear.

[Image description start. A photo of a non-binary person wearing the purple hat above, which seems to form two pointed cat ears at the top corners. The person's eyes have been censored with a black bar that reads it / its. The edge of the hat has been folded up slightly to form a brim. Image description end.]

The brown one I started last night then just finished today. I was originally going to add an orange eye on the front to make it seemed after one of my original characters but I like it just as it is.

[Image description start. The same non-binary person now wearing the brown and black hat with the same censor bar with its pronouns listed. Image description end.]

These are made with double crochet, but you can use any stitch you want.

To make this, figure out how tall and wide you have want your hat to be, and which way you want the stitches to face then make a rectangle that when folded in half matches that, and close the openings except for one.

The purple one was made so that when I finished it I turned the whole thing at the 90° angle, so that what had been the side of the crochet became the opening, and what had been the top and bottom were sealed shut.

The brown one I just closed the ends of the rectangle and the top.

[Image description start. Two simple digital diagrams showing how to make the hats above. The first shows the brown and black hat, first shown as a flat rectangle, with instructions to fold it sideways upon itself. Then you seal the top and the side, and your hat is ready.

The second shows the purple hat, instructing you to flip the flat rectangle at a 90°, then fold it down, and it's seal both sides.

Best versions have a drawing showing that the hat is ready of a simple smiling stick figure wearing the hat surrounded by lines as though the person is glowing.]

You can flip your rectangle anyway you want to get the pattern you want.

I don't remember what I used as a base for the purple hat but for the brown and black one I did a chain of 65 to start. Just measure around whoever's head is supposed to be wearing the hat to make sure it will be wide enough.

You can also probably definitely make one that has handles so that it can be either hat or a bag.

#Rjalker does crochet #described images #crochet #cat ear hat #hat #cat hat #idk lol #nyanbinary #ehehehe #crochet cat hat

[rjalker]

Shockingly, googling "crochet disability aids" does in fact come up with disability aids for crocheting, rather than "crochet this to decorate your disability aid". Nice.

The metal hooks I got are annoying in the small sizes because the handle width shrinks in proportion to the hook size and makes it even harder to use than it needs to be ..

#Rjalker does crochet #disability aids #accessible arts and crafts #catchy tag... #more accessible wt leart!!! #cripplepunk

[rjalker]

I can make starfish now

[Image description start. A photo of three crochet starfish on a fake marble counter. Each starfish is two colors, with one color on the inside and the other on the outside. The first is blue and yellow, the second is yellow and blue, and the third is blue and seafoam green. In the background is a bag of crochet hooks, some scissors, and a stick with the yellow yarn wrapped around it. Image description end.]

I attempted to make a tutorial. Assumes you know how to do basic crochet stitches

#Rjalker does crochet #described images #Youtube

[rjalker]

Oh hey. Crochet people! You don't have to do a magic circle or chain 4 and slip stitch, you can literally just treat the first chain as a circle and do stitches into it!!! Then pull on the tail to tighten it!!!!!

To do douvle crochets, chain 3, then use the first chain as the circle.

Actually Walks is here so I made a video showing how to do it. Brb in like 10mins while it uploads to Youtube....

...Okay it was longer than 10 minutes but anyways, here you go!

Someone tell me how I can rotate this video. It wasn't supposed to be sideways...

This video is also on the web archive! Feel free to download it. Apparently you can't link videos from there so they're playable from the dashboard...

[ID: A two minute video in portait mode, showing how to crochet a circle using a gold metal hook, and blue yarn against a black background, with flash on. White hands hold the string and hook, and demonstrate how to do three chains, followed by multiple double crochets, while the narrator says, interrupted at one point as a black and white kitten jumps up and obscures the hook and yarn with her face for a moment, then leaving one paw visible: "--it might be a Short on YouTube but okay uh this is how you can skip doing a magic ring or chaining four and then going back! So put on a slip knot and then chain three, that's one, two, three, yarn over, and then use your very first chain as a thing and pull through --oops-- then do a double crochet like normal: yarn over.. and literally just keep doing this until you get all the way around-- "--oh, Saphire wants to join the party. And she's sticking her face under the camera, sticking her face in my-- tail in my face. hi. "Sapphire she wants to know why we're not petting her… Then when you are all done, put the hook---if I can do it on camera--through the first stitch…which I'm failing at… Whatever, good enough. "Do a slip stitch, now you have a circle, and then you just pull on the piece of yarn to tighten it, and now it's completely solid in the center and you can continue making your hat or whatever you're making and you don't have to do a magic circle or waste yarn chaining four and then slip stitching and then having a giant hole in the center, and it is so much easier! Why doesn't everybody do this?! All righty, that's it, bye-bye!" End ID.]

#crochet #crochet tips #Rjalker does crochet #Youtube

[rjalker]

#crochet patterns #Rjalker does crochet

[rjalker]

were it not for that acursed hat I would have written my cyberpunk cyberfurry dystopia mickey mouse neopronoun short story in time to post it at exactly midnight.

Alas.

I was crocheting instead.

I also need some neopronouns for Minnie, Pete, the cow, and the parrot. Please suggest some.

#Rjalker does crochet #Mickey Mouse #public domain

[rjalker]

I found a free PDF with a tutorial for making a crochet cardigan that includes lots of details for beginners

Here's the PDF link

And if the direct link to the PDF doesn't work here's from the original site.

here's a video tutorial

#Rjalker does crochet #crochet patterns #free crochet patterns #crochet hexagon cardigan #Youtube

[rjalker]

this one shows you how to do all the basics with crochet so if you've got a crochet hook and some yarn you can follow along.

#undescribed images #untranscribed video #actually making a granny square now #which can then be used to make a bunch of things #Rjalker does crochet #crochet #granny square #crochet tutorial #Youtube

[rjalker]

Octopus! Made the same way as the starfish but you make 8 arms instead of 4 and make them a bit longer.

#undescribed images #Rjalker does crochet

[rjalker]

I've made 20 of them so far

#undescribed images #Rjalker does crochet

[rjalker]

The best I could do, thought making it two separate things would make it easier.

[Image description start. A photo of a crochet bracelet of the Palestinian flag on a white hand held against a wall. The bracelet is made of two layers, with the bottom layer the horizontal stripes of black white and green, and a large red sideways triangle as an upper layer. Image description end.]

#free palestine #palestine #gaza #free gaza #Rjalker does crochet #described images #from the river to the sea

[rjalker]

we don't own a mannekin head so I had to take a selfie to show the hat properly and it was fun so from now on if I take pictures of myself I'm drawing over my eyes to make them cool lol.

$90 hat right here

[ID: A cropped photo showing the cameraperson wearing a crochet hat in the repeating colors of the trans pride flag: blue, pink, and white. The bottom of the hat are simple solid stripes, the top is in granny stitches. The person's one visible eye behind its glasses has been drawn over digitally to make the iris orange and the white pale yellow. End ID.]

I deviated from the pattern because I got tired of making the granny stitches.

I'd have done the progress trans flag but I'm out of yellow yarn.

#Rjalker does crochet #described images

[rjalker]

Might not have enough of the blue for the handles like I planned...

#undescribed images #Rjalker does crochet #this is taking so looooong lol...