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zenless-popcorn · 1 year

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Open Letter to Nik The Forge Bear

Dear Nik the Forge Bear and The Boundless Library,

You pride yourself on the fact that The Boundless Library being a safe space for people to be themselves and be supported, because you never had that growing up, but in reality, it's not that at all. It's not a safespace for everyone to be who they are, they can only be who they are if they fit into what are in your opinion acceptable boxes.

Obviously, in the opinion of you and the Mods, my wife didn't fit.

The Mods considered her was too loud, too silly, too chaotic, too open, too opinionated, too weird. Every point Ruby stated against her was, as far as she was aware, dealt with, sorted and over with. Resolved. But then these issues were brought up all over again... it's almost like The Powers That Be there (and yes, this includes you, Nik) were just looking for a reason to get rid of her. She was accused of complaining if she didn't like something, when she was just voicing my opinion. Are differing opinions not welcome in the library? Surely this is how people grow, buy learning from differing opinions and experiences.

She was accused of badgering for content, which she didn't and wouldn't do.There may have been misscommnications as to what commission was being spoken about, as it came over as if mods were talking about the art project, which was not even on her mind at that time, or something else totally unrelated. Granted, she jokingly lamented the lack of communication between yourself and myself after I requested a commission on February 21st (and your lack of response was a tad unprofessional, talking as a content creator, I always made sure people have a response within days...and if it was highlighted that I'd miss someone, I would email an apology and details), but that was it, just a throw away comment, followed up by acknowledgement of your busy schedule and that she wouldn't be making future commision requests as not to add more work, which was then blown out of all proportion by Mods, who alongside 2 other members began dog piling on her all saying the same thing she had already acknowledged.

Oh, that reminds me, please be kind enough to cancel my commission, I'd email you, but I won't actually know if you have recieved it or not when you never reply to them to let your client even know if you have taken on the job, so let’s be honest now what would be the point?

That joke earned her a 24 hour mute, which took place 2 days after her dad died, she was in a very dark place and genuinely did not remember much of that week or the week after, and the Mods were aware of this. Perhaps you should get mods who have better communication skills, and not say things are ok when they are not, or maybe read messages and actually understand them properly.

As an autistic person adapting to change is difficult for her at the best of times, adapting to the seismic shift that was the death of her father, the man who raised her for 10 years when her mother left them, was always there for her (and our family) was beyond comprehension. He was laying in his flat for 24-48 hours before being found, had to have criminal investigations started, had to have an autopsy performed, and by the time all that was done he was not suitable for for us to view him once he got to the funeral home. She kept all that between herself and a few members in a private chat as not to bother the library at large. Because she hates bothering people. She stepped back from "Designated Reviver" role, because she just didn't have the energy.

When the mute was put in place she was dragged over the coals for contacting you directly too much and spoken to like she was scum. She literally reached out for just a hug and support after her dad died. She didn't think it would be as much of an issue as it was. Turns out she was wrong. The only other contact She had made to you was in regards to the art project, or in response to your messaging her. That was when she learned that you do not mean what you say.Yes, she did rage quit, she was angry, scared, upset, and confused as to what exactly she was being punished for when from our perspective it had been dealt with and was no longer an issue. She had talked with Wen, apologised to her taking it out on her and was again under the impression it was over and done with and no longer an issue. She set boundaries to never bother the bear again, ever. She'd already decided to cut your participation on the art project, thus wouldn't have reasons to contact you. She was intending to contact Wen in the next 2 weeks to notify you that your participation was no longer required.The Mods also highlighted the “copyright issue” that was never an actual issue in the first place, but down to another member of the library causing malice. Even though that is resolved, and despite it being a major part of her work, you will be pleased to hear that any artwork that was inspired by your Smirky Bear logo that you may suddenly consider a breach in copyright have been destroyed, so that is now no longer an issue (even thought it wasn’t one in the first place, but with the way attitudes have changed of late I feel this is a better safe than sorry thing).

She got upset during a Zoom call due to being asked to leave and not understanding why and was accused of using it as "an opportunity to garner sympathy" which was not the case and such an accusation is totally out of order, and completely inaccurate. Do you condone your Mods making such harsh accusations of anyone, much less people struggling with complex situations? She was genuinely upset and didn't understand what the issue was. It was not explained to her beyond "your tattoo is promlematic, you need to leave" almost 30 minutes after the tattoo topic was discussed (how does that even work, why wait HALF AN HOUR after a subject is discussed before ejecting someone for something that has been and gone? This makes no sense and also feels like the Mods just building things up so they had an excuse to remove my wife from The Boundless Library), a tattoo she explained the back story to, that it came from a place of care, compassion and support for a tattoo artist who suffered a career ending stroke. Said tattoo artist has spent his life and work reclaiming symbols from negative connotations and teaching about the actual meaning behind them. Absolutely not a hate symbol. And, if you do a little research, you'll find that the name of the symbol means "conducive to well-being" and is one of the oldest symbols of positive energy. Also, being a place of care and support you'd think that you learn about things and no be so closed of mind...to know is to grow. (Incidentally, I have done a lot of research on the World Wars, and I know how people saw the Swastika, but I wasn’t so closed of mind as many, as I researched the symbol, I learned about it during Religious Studies also, and here’s the kicker for you, my RS teacher was an elderly Jewish man, who had numbers tattooed on his arm.I taught me how not to judge people, and symbols. You should perhaps have your Mods do the same.) When she left the Zoom she was under the impression Tara would chat with her the next day and we could figure it out and move on from there, she even considered getting the tattoo covered up, if that would've made people comfortable, that was how much the library meant to her.

She loved the library,She loved the Beasties,She loved you.

She's basically being punished and/or made an example of for having differing opinions, voicing opinions, grieving, having emotions, and not adapting to a major upheaval quickly enough for the mods, and by extension, YOU. Does that sound fair?

From my perspective it was like a lost lil sheep got a bit confused and was trying to get back into the flock, stumbled and fell. Instead of actually helping and supporting the sheep the mods started kicking the sheep, couldn't understand why the scared, hurt sheep wouldn't obey, so instead of backing off and letting the lost lil sheep find its way, they kicked it off a cliff and shouted "land safely!"

YOU let that happen.YOU condoned it.YOU approved of it.

She was only a member for around 8 weeks. Which is no time at all. Not when 4 weeks of that was spent dealing with the business of death.She had wanted to request the ban be rescinded due its total unfairness, being completely unnecessary, was far too heavy handed, and outright bullying, but she has now deleted her Discord account, TikTok account, canceled her Patreon and Quinn subscriptions, and have no intention of rejoining.

What I do not understand more than anything else in all this is that the Mods brought up a whole list of things that had ALREADY BEEN RESOLVED as reasons to get rid of her. That is cruel, callous and underhand. Especially doing it at the time she needed people more than anything else. If it was new incidents, that would make sense, and when Mods say something is fine or they have no issue with a person they should actually mean it, otherwise actually say what the problem is.

She will miss the friends she had made and the fun she had. She really did think she had found her family, her safe space,a place to grow and learn, which she had been doing.You really need to take a long hard look at yourself and the library, and really really think, is the library a safe space for all, or only those who fit into what you consider acceptable little boxes.The place comes over as a total high school clique fest, and is most certainly not as safe or accepting a place as you have tried to make it out to be. Don't worry about her, she'll be fine. She was before she met you, and she most certainly will be after.

She will hold no ill will toward you, but she'll also hold no good will. This is a waste of energy that you do not deserve from someone as awesome as her.Now, if you'll excuse me, I need to help my wife, she has a castle to storm.

Regards

Saire

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