#Listen. i choose you by sara bareilles and grow as we go by ben platt and apple pie by lizze mcalpine are my favorites here !!! | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

forwardiscalling · 5 years

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one love

a collection of songs that remind me of the themes in bare

spotify link: https://open.spotify.com/user/y6stmlk1ufcxeczep0f48rnvm/playlist/6tFiFQORT9oYKn7uGoM8Ly?si=DqH13WNETYGyfyrrhzS5zg

moments silence // hozier

When the meaning's gone There is clarity And the reason comes In the common tongue In you lovin' me

keeping a secret // bleachers

And oh God, it's a long walk home But I understand why I walk alone Cause hey, we keep it a secret

ribs // lorde

You're the only friend I need Sharing beds like little kids And laughing 'til our ribs get tough But that will never be enough

more under the read more!

grow as we go // ben platt

I don't think you have to leave If to change is what you need You can change right next to me

funny you should ask // the front bottoms

'Cause I was young I thought I didn't have to care about anything But I'm older now and know that I should

bad habit // ben platt

Hate to say that I love you Hate to say that I need you Hate to say that I want you But I do

from eden // hozier

I slithered here from Eden Just to sit outside your door

ease my mind // hayley kiyoko

I feel you in the wind chill And it's so real, straight through my bones I can only just imagine Your passion, you take me home

rubber band // sean grandillo

I feel like I fucked up all my plans To prove to the person that I was that I’m different now

ease my mind // ben platt

You came out of nowhere and you cut through all the noise I make sense to the madness when I listen to your voice

fairy tale books // sean grandillo

A habit that we chose Never was supposed to but nothing’s forever And we swore we’d be clever enough to let it go

sucker // jonas brothers

I'm a sucker for all the subliminal things No one knows about you (about you) about you (about you) And you're making the typical me break my typical rules

the louvre // lorde

Our thing progresses I call and you come through Blow all my friendships To sit in hell with you

fools // troye sivan

Only fools fall for you, only fools fall Only fools do what I do, only fools fall

the other side // conan gray

All of our dreams are kept fragrant And I'll meet you on the pavement When we make it to the other side

heaven // troye sivan

Without losing a piece of me How do I get to heaven? Without changing a part of me How do I get to heaven?

to myself // alfie arcuri

Memories and scars of a childhood mind We are just standing in the shadows with no sense of time Am I just lost? Can't find my way home

about you now // meadowlark

Can we bring yesterday back around? 'Cause I know how I feel about you now I was dumb, I was wrong, I let you down But I know how I feel about you now

for him. // troye sivan

You don't have to say I love you to say I love you Forget all the shooting stars and all the silver moons We've been making shades of purple out of red and blue

i choose you // sara bareilles

Tell the world that we finally got it all right I choose you I will become yours and you will become mine

strawberries and cigarettes // troye sivan

Remember when you taught me fate Said it'd all be worth the wait Like that night in the back of the cab When your fingers walked in my hand

(not on spotify, link for youtube:

dress // taylor swift

Say my name and everything just stops I don’t want you like a best friend

#playlist #bare a pop opera #songs

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catchmesinging-blog · 6 years

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MIT Blogger 3 Questions

What happened Tuesday?

The pencil slowly scratched against the paper as my heart beat fast and the mosquitos slowly pecked at my legs. I was drawing—wow, after how many years? I had stumbled upon an uncomfortable situation after all. A week in the same house as 8 of my cousins. A week with people I barely knew and people I considered very different from me. Thus, I did what I usually do when I don’t know what’s wrong—I let my thoughts flow through my hands. Either writing or drawing works. In this case, I let my pencil make the shape of a bull dog with a seal coming out of it’s ear. The seal looked worried, but over all, it looked like a coherent drawing, although a bit concerning.

Imagine spending most of your life running away from an idea—growing up, in this case. Or at least thinking that “doing grown-up society things” made you fake and mainstream, and thus you should avoid them at all costs. Imagine that your friends are mostly people who challenge the norms, and then all of a sudden, you are expected to let others recommend you what to wear, say, and look for a party. Imagine spending years running away from people who sit down and gossip about each other’s appearences to then have them be your cousins.

I am in Peru, and I decided to go on vacation with my cousins to a beach in the north for a week. Tuesday--the first afternoon. And I was already feeling confused. I had never drunk as much alcohol as them...I have a simple fashion style...why does it matter that your friend gained two pounds...why is everyone on their phones??

So it was Tuesday afternoon and I was about to go partying with my cousins and I was afraid. So I called my dad. There are two things that I do when I feel confused--I either let my thoughts flow or I call my dad/mom. Both provide wisdom.

What is your current obsession?

I think I follow too many Broadway stars on Instagram. It’s Broadway. How can I not be obsessed with the thought of embodying a story through words, creating a whole world with my stories and the stories of others? Speaking from the heart, singing from the deepest parts of the diaphragm!! A yes, performance. My second love, next to reading (and my family). Although, since I started MIT, that obsession has diminished. I think it has to do with the fact that my mind thinks it will never get the chance to be this way—meet Ben Platt, sing with Sara Bareilles, go to the Tonys and perform, a thought that a year ago filled my heart with joy but currently feels a bit more like an aching longing while I do psets and look at STEM careers.

The thousands of Bollywood songs I listened to, but now are just an old playlist on my YouTube account. The thousands of facts I knew about Shah Rukh Khan, how I dreamed of singing Hindi along side him. Yet, here we are. I still “heart” every Ben Platt post about his new tour around the country and cry (sob, actually, if I’m being very honest) when I watch someone singing to express their pain or joy for the first time. Because I believe in the arts!! And as much as some people might say that the arts have no place in front of science and facts and unquestionable ideas—why limit ourselves to that part of ourselves and not embrace the intangible?

Honestly, Broadway creates some really beautiful stuff. If those people ever have some free time, I’d recommend them to watch Lin Manuel Miranda sing Disney songs or belt Hamilton raps. Or to have them try it themselves. It’s the most beautiful feeling—standing on a stage, proclaiming the stories of others at the top of your range and knowing that everyone around you hears you. It’s liberating, it’s humbling, it’s purposeful, it’s beautiful :)

What is something vexing that you're currently wrestling with?

It’s hard for me to define what I’m struggling with—maybe that’s why I struggle with it so much :) But I think it is deeply rooted in my identity. My friend Enriko put it very beautifully in his last post in the MISTI blogs website (www.mistiblogs.com) –how, coming from a community where getting to MIT was rare and wonderful and amazing, and yet, how I had formed a whole identity surrounding this one goal. And now I don’t know what to do or how to act.

Scene 1: High School Luisa is invited to a party.

*smiling and laughing with a friend*

Friend: Luisaaaa!! What are you doing this weekend? Do you want to come to a party?

My mind: Luisa, don’t. Don’t---NO, don’t you DARE go out this weekend, you have to finish this essay and you KNOW it’s going to take you forever so don’t you DARE. And besides, students like you can stay innocent and inexperienced and you’ll still be accepted. And you want to go to MIT so, just focus on this. You promised your mom you wouldn’t drink and doing anything else—heck no.

Me: But—but I haven’t gone out all year. A couple of hours wouldn’t hurt would it? Besides, I want to get to know this person better and I trust them…

My mind: Do you think this person likes you?? A person like HIM wouldn’t like a student like you. You can’t even go out very often. You are not like them. YOU are to stay home and sing and be happy and work with your heart and…done. You know what your goal is.

Me: I’m sorry, I can’t. I have a project due Monday…*resumes smiling*

Scene 2: Luisa is accepted to MIT

Friend: Congratulations Luisa!!! Oh my gosh, it was your dream school!! You are so smart, you are so amazing!!

My mind: *quiet*

Me: Wait, why am I feeling sad and lonely?

My mind: You never deserved this. You wanted to be a singer, yet you followed what was set for you. Look at all the wonderful engineers on the Facebook page for MIT 2021, are you like them?? You are an artist! You are being a sellout by going to that place!!

Me: Thank you! *big smile, pit of confusion in my stomach*

And thus I am struggling with my identity. Sticking so strictly to my identity or “who I thought I was” closed doors that looking back, I would have liked to open. Was it worth it? Leaving behind so many things to go to college and maybe not “living my teenage years” like others?

But this—this “Box” thing doesn’t work at MIT. MIT students are unique. They show me everyday that it is okay to be oneself, even if one doesn’t know who one is yet. And is opening up to the possibility of leaving old perceptions of oneself behind and embracing better ones, however frightening that might be.

What will I decide to live? When I fall in love, what will I choose to do with my partner? What type of person will I love? What will my career be? What do I say to friends different from me? How do I reconcile my past with my present? How am I loyal to the values taught to me by my family yet open to new experiences?

These are the questions that vex me at the moment. Wrestling is a good word. Like a butterfly in her cocoon, I am wrestling with the outer layers I have held for so long and hoping that through lots of love, work, and trust--the future I will see with my new wings and experiences will be as beautiful as the childhood I carry in the deepest part of my heart.

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