#Idw pay money for something I don’t OWN for the rest of my life…

[thanksjro]

More Than Meets the Eye #31 - Ammo and the Anti-Glowup

So, the Lost Light disappeared, stranding all the crew in space in their little escape pods. 200-some robots just lost their homes and worldly possessions. That’s absolutely horrible. What a devastating thing to happen.

Anyway, here’s Drift with a flashback sequence.

No hips, fingers all the exact same length, hockey pucks embedded in his forearms- Rojo, this is a crime you’ve committed. When will the long arm of the law stop your sinful, pancake-shaped hands?

About two years prior to current events, Drift, Riptide, and Pipes- yes, Pipes!- were wandering around trying to find a ship for the space yacht trip. The gang’s here to see who owns the big honkin’ ship outside. Problem is, Drift is unintentionally terrifying because he has a great deal of swords.

Now, you may say to yourself “isn’t it a bit odd that the species that has members who literally turn into guns would be nervous around a guy with swords?” This is a valid critique, until you remember that at least some of the folks who turn into guns were born that way, and Drift was very much NOT born bladed the fuck out. There’s an entire miniseries devoted to explaining this, it’s called Drift. The swords are a choice, one that he makes every day.

Drift is willing to pay an honestly absurd amount of money for the ship, if he can just find the dude with the paperwork- don’t ask where he got the money. Pipes isn’t being terribly helpful in finding them, so Riptide decides that now is the time to start practicing being proactive and pulls a Coyote Ugly.

No, no, he doesn’t.

He does climb up on a table and start yelling for the ship’s owners to reveal themselves, though. Which they do.

Now it’s time for the world-building portion of our comic issue. Let’s learn about chirolinguistics.

Drift, staying true to his Mary Sue nature, uses his near-perfect Hand skills to strike up a deal with the owners of the ship. This would be impressive, if it didn’t just look like the most convoluted hand-holding session in the friggin’ universe.

Still, Drift is rich enough to make Jeff Bezos weep with envy, so the arrangements are made and the lads go on their way, talking some mad shit about the original name of the ship as they do.

So it is revealed to us that the Lost Light is named after a festival for honoring the dead and disappeared, which makes the fact that Rewind and Chromedome were there all the more sad.

Back in the present, Megatron tells Riptide to shut up so they can figure out what the hell they’re going to do about this whole “our home and also ride has ceased to exist” situation. He’s putting an awful lot of distance between himself and the rest of the Autobots as he does it, something that isn’t lost on the more bitter people of the crowd.

But why were we even talking about the Lost Light in the first place? Not to reminisce, believe it or not. See, it’s time for Nautica to get a little panel time, and she’s going to use it to be a massive fucking nerd and explain how the quantum engines work. As she does, Ratchet notes that his hands feel funny. Must be the weight of his hand-stealing sins manifesting itself in his joints.

Nautica explains that the engines run off of improbability- it is highly unlikely, but not impossible, that the ship can reach light speed, and riding the fine line between what can happen and what can’t, results in the creation of power for the engines. If this sounds familiar, it’s because Brainstorm gave us a watered down version of this explanation back in issue #2. If it sounds familiar for a different reason, it’s because this is how the Heart of Gold runs in Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy. Again, I’m not sure why it is that the British love this concept so much, but there you are.

Oh, it appears someone has a question. Let’s see what they want to know about, shall we?

…Rojo, what the fuck is this.

Our muppety friend here isn’t too keen on how much of a smarmy asshole Nightbeat is being right now, though I’d assume it actually has something to do with the fact that Nightbeat got smacked around with the pretty-boy stick while Getaway very much did not. While the two bicker- there’s a lot of bickering in Season Two- Nautica presents a theory on what happened to the ship; it went too far in the direction of “can’t” and made itself cease to be.

Megatron gives not a shit about quantum improbability, though. He only cares about how they’re going to get out of this mess. Which, y’know. Valid.

Blaster picks up a radio from Rodimus, who tells the gang that they’re to meet up on a nearby planet to regroup and figure out their next move. The call drops before he can get more than a couple Megatron-directed insults in, however. Megatron, in response, tries to be the bigger person, and almost immediately fails. We do get a headcount though, which is good, logistically speaking. This information is communicated to us by way of a splash page full of character head shots. We’ve got 20 ‘bots on board this ship.

Yep. 20. No more, no less.

As our friends approach the planet, we’re informed that it’s actually a Lectureworld- a planet devoted to the study of a single field. Except it’s actually a Smartplanet now, and it’s been privatized by the Galactic Council, so you’ve got to pay to go there. Cyclonus thinks that that’s bullshit, and I can’t help but agree. Crosscut tries to network with they guy about his play, probably because word got around that Cyclonus is rich as hell, when the lights cut out. When they come back on, Crosscut is nowhere to be found.

It’s time for a Whodunnit.

Tailgate immediately pegs Megatron as the culprit in this disappearance, and breaks out a gun over the matter. Megatron thinks that this is absolutely adorable, which only serves to further infuriate our marshmallow friend. I guess he’s still mad about the whole “I was a Decepticon for five minutes and got brainwashed over it” thing, and wants someone to pin the anger on who’s socially acceptable to hate.

Cyclonus and Ratchet both think that Tailgate’s not going about this the right way, but the guy is simply too het up to listen to them. Tailgate suggests that they lock Megatron in the engine room for the time being and-

OKAY WHO LET HIM HAVE THAT

Riptide breaks out his gun, and soon we’ve got a standoff going between the three of them. Cyclonus tries to deescalate, which makes Gears and Huffer break out their guns. Then Hound breaks out his gun, though he seems to be doing his own thing, by pointing it in Nautica’s direction.

Broski, I think that might be animal cruelty.

Megatron manages to shoot Ravage “unconscious” and catches him by the friggin’ throat, stating that he has zero idea how this guy got here. With the heat off the two of them for a moment, Megatron communicates to Ravage to play ‘possum for the time being. Ravage responds, and I wonder exactly how he’s doing that, considering I don’t think he has enough fingers to effectively utilize Hand as a language. Or fingers at all, really.

While this is going on, Cyclonus snatches the gun out of Tailgate’s hand, admonishing him for being reckless about picking his fights. Generally speaking, you don’t want to try to go toe-to-toe with a guy who’s responsible for the deaths of literal billions. Getaway swoops in to comfort Tailgate, calling him gutsy. I wonder if this will become a trend.

Swerve says a thing, as he is wont to do, and it’s made known that multiple folks have disappeared during this incredibly brief standoff.

Wow, Chromedome just fucked off, huh? He wasn’t even in that sequence, just left.

Everyone’s positively baffled by the current happenings. There doesn’t seem to be any rhyme or reason to who’s being taken. I guess we’ve got a mystery on our hands.

And who better to solve a mystery than a detective?

Nightbeat wrangles all the leftover folks into a corner of the room, so they can figure out what the common denominator is with all the disappearees. He starts with the easy stuff.

And by “easy”, I mean the super-special racism Tyrest subscribed to.

If you’ve read Eugenesis, you know that Nightbeat was also part of the first wave of cold-constructed bodies there. However, the general populace wasn’t nearly as chill about it as they were in IDW. Also, Wheeljack was his dad. No word on if that particular tidbit made it into IDW lore.

It’s at this point that we learn about M.T.O.s- made to order soldiers. They were cold-constructed ‘bots created en masse during the war in order to keep up with the demands for troops. Pretty fucked up, if you think about it, being born to die like that.

Now where have we heard that name before…

Chromedome, can your love life not be part of the plot for five minutes, my guy?

Nautica makes the honestly horrific claim that a lot of folks owe their existence to Megatron being a warmongering fuck, and even Megatron himself seems rather uncomfortable with the idea. Some thoughts we keep to ourselves, Nautica, even if they might be technically true. And even if Ammo wants to tack on his two cents on the matter.

What did they DO to you, Ammo? You’re supposed to be hot! Where are my three-paragraphs of description as Hound stares slack jawed the entire time? I miss Polyhex Wars.

Anyway, it’s Megatron’s turn to get poked with the questioning stick, and he’s not having it. He claims that by revealing his mode of creation, he’s risking a repeat of Functionist ideology. This would be valid, if people weren’t literally disappearing without any sort of explanation as to why. As it is, he’s being a stubborn asshole, but I guess he didn’t get his reputation by being a decent person who knew when to back down, now did he?

It’s at this point that Ratchet remembers he knows all the info Nightbeat’s looking for, and the conversation on Megatron’s birth is shelved for another day. I’m sure it won’t be a major plot point later, not in the slightest.

As it turns out, Nightbeat’s theory doesn’t hold water, and folks are still popping out of existence. We get another splash page, this time with everyone’s mode of creation listed under their names, and we move on to other theories about what the fuck is going on. While Nightbeat has a minor crisis over what the answer could possibly be, the MTOs in the group reminisce on the Ten-Step Program, a series of tests they were put through to make sure they worked well enough to get handed a gun and shoved out the door. Riptide wasn’t a fan.

Riptide has more wood panelling than a 70’s-style ranch house, and I think that’s very brave of him.

It’s at this point that Ratchet remembers it’s been quite a bit since he last shat on religion, and takes the time to do so while informing the reader about Information Creep. This is a concept we’ve seen mentioned previously, during Chromedome’s runaround in Overlord’s brain, but it’s here where we get the juicy implications.

Because memories can become corrupted in the brain due to extreme age, what ought to be objective fact has to be reinterpreted due to missing pieces. This is why nobody knows what the Knights of Cybertron got up to, or if they’re even actually real at all.

The lights go out again, and when they cut back on, Cyclonus is missing, leaving only his sword behind. Tailgate is extremely distraught by this, but Nightbeat gives not a fuck about Tailgate’s impending breakdown. He only cares about the truth!

And then a giant eyeball shows up.

It’s Ultra Magnus, coming to us live from his shuttle, via holomatter avatar! He shrinks down to a far more reasonable size, in a panel reminiscent of the first time IDW readers saw Megatron.

Don’t get me wrong, this is a neat parallel, I’m just… not terribly sure why it’s happening. One could say it reflects a reversal in power dynamics, but that theory gets tossed out the window when you remember that this isn’t actually Verity. I suppose it’s just a cool little thing.

Because the comms aren’t working, Ultra Magnus has been forced to use this avatar to communicate with the folks in the Rod Pod. Megatron asks just what the hell is going on, but unfortunately Magnus isn’t sure either. Then his shuttle disappears, and it’s bye-bye grunge girl Magnus.

It’s at this point that Nightbeat decides it’s time to stop pussyfooting around and get serious. He tells Ratchet to throw HIPPA directly in the garbage and write down everything he knows about the Autobots who crewed the Lost Light. And he does mean everything, as we get the splash page again, this time with lots of neat info on our friends, including spark type.

Spark types will become plot-relevant in the storyline after this, but for now let’s focus on some weird gender essentialism that got slapped into the first print of this issue.

As we know very well by this point, Transformers as a franchise has a tumultuous relationship with the idea of women existing. You would think that the awkward introduction of other genders we got in “Dark Cybertron” would have been the end of things being weird in IDW. However, you would be wrong.

In an effort to explain why genders exist, Roberts had the idea to make it spark-based. Nautica, in the solo print of this issue, has an estriol-positive spark. Estriol is a type of estrogen, which is the hormone that develops and maintains feminine secondary sex characteristics, when present in certain levels, in conjunction with other hormones. Biology

This “spark = gender” idea is, generally speaking, not a great idea to be presenting us with, especially when the writer is a cishet male, because it implies biological essentialism- the idea that a personality trait/quality of a person is innate and predetermined by their biology, as opposed to social, cultural, or individual experiences. Because this story doesn’t exist in a vacuum, it’s irresponsible to reduce the experience of being a woman to a single, physical, unchangable asset, especially when all other assets of the same class have zero effect on one’s gender identity. You don’t exactly see many nonbinary robots running around, now do you? And there are definitely more than two spark types, despite the Transformers as a species being... very binary.

It also makes female Transformers into an “other”, which is a problem that has existed from the very start of the franchise, in some form or fashion, and really doesn’t need to be perpetrated anymore than it already is.

The estriol spark type was removed in the trade edition, and Roberts has expressed regrets over its inclusion, having realized that it was potentially offensive.

Getting back to the story, Swerve, Tailgate, and Ratchet have disappeared, though Ratchet seems to have left his hands behind. His stolen, Pharma-original hands.

That’s still fucked up to me. I don’t think it’ll ever not be fucked up.

Riptide reveals the reason that he wasn’t in Season One of MTMTE was because when he went back to grab a receipt for the ship two years prior, he’d discovered that the original owners were worshipers of Mortilus, Cybertronian god of death, and knew about the nasty little problem that was the sparkeater from the first storyline. When Riptide went to confront them about it, they beat him up so bad he was unconscious for two solid days.

Which is a long-ass time to be unconscious. That might have been a coma, Riptide. Jesus, I hope someone got him to a hospital after this beatdown happened, or at least scraped him off the floor.

With this last piece of the puzzle, we finally have the common denominator in this big ol’ mystery. Everyone who disappeared was on the Lost Light when it took off from Cybertron in issue #1, and everyone left behind- Skids, Getaway, Nightbeat, Nautica, Megatron, and Ravage- didn’t join until afterwords.

Of course, having the answer doesn’t do us much good when everyone is still missing, and Megatron seems to agree with me, because he’s about to throw hands, when Nautica lets them know that they’ve arrived at the rendezvous. Problem is, so has something else.

...

I’m sure it’s fiiiiiiiiiiiiine!

#transformers #jro #MTMTE #issue 31 #maccadam #Hannzreads #text post #long post #incoming analysis #overthinking about robots #comic script writing

[0225pm]

sad bc no pictures today!!!! :( i didn't managed to snap any because of time constraints :(((((((((( anyway guess who finally get to meet her bb today? 😂 das right, me!!!!!! kind of a bummer bc i didn't expect that i'll actually get a shift on tuesday? i can't rmbr giving any shift for tuesday either but oh well i don't have a choice. but the feel to not go to work today was super strong though. if can, i wanted to skip work just to be able to spend more time with han but of course, i shouldn't be irresponsible just because i want to spend time with the love of my life. besides, it was already far too late to find a replacement + get an mc + i didn't wanna leave any more bad impression since their current impression of me is a little too close to borderline termination (ok it's just an exaggeration but ya idw to be a candidate for termination!!!!) ok so like i met han rly late, we only had about two hours to spend with each other before i start my shift and i was a tad bit grumpy because han sorta promised me meet me earlier today but i guess he was really tired or something. to the point that he even FORGOT that we're meeting early???? rly damn taik i want to punch him. i thought we can spend a little more time together today since we're always meeting during late afternoons but ughHh it was a botched. but i guess i should take 10% of the blame as well since i was about 15-20 mins late. honestly i was deciding what to wear and i was trying to dig out the company clothes from my narnia of a wardrobe (i own quite a fair bit of stuff from the company most of which i bought ages ago before i even started working for them but unfortunately, past seasons clothing pieces are not allowed even though they're bought from the company itself. i need more of their updated season clothing ughHhh). idk man i think i'm damn clingy or like what i heard han said, manja?? idk if there's a diff ah between those two words but?????? ok anyway then we went to have early dinner and i asked him what he wanted to eat and then he said "prata or smth" but when he came back to the table he was only carrying one plate and i got even grumpier bc i was like "then u not eating????" and then he's like "eating eating u makan abeh suap i pon we share" then i'm like??????? wtf i'm not eating alone???????? then he's like nO noooo i eat then i was like, is it u ate alr?????? then he just kept smiling that sheepish smile (the kinda smile that makes u wanna flick him bc u alr know the answer to ur own question) but ya apparently he alr ate chicken at home???? and i was like?????? and then we had a little mini argument bc he was being so passive aggressive about this person i added into ml squad and whom i followed on ig all lmaO so i decided like ok u know what i'm just gonna kick him outta the squad, unfriend and unfollow him ok and then he went all "noOoo i'm ok with it" but i still did it anyway bc idk i just can't stand his passive aggressiveness and then i asked him to honestly tell me???? if it bothers him and then he got all mad at me bc i kept asking and he alr said no but idk man deep down i still feel like a part of him wasn't feeling ok with it bc he raised the topic + even "joked" about how he's gonna do the same wtf idiot i want to puncH him but ok so i just decided to follow that feel i had and went ahead with what i've decided 😂 and then he ended up only taking a bite out of the plate of rice and i ate the rest of it. he complained that it was too spicy so he didn't want anymore (but lol i know it was just an excuse bc he's prolly too full) *rolls eyes* ok n then dayah told me that her class ended early so she was already at paya lebar but it was still a little early (we had about an hour or so to kill) so i asked her to come over to tamp instead and yes we were working the same shift today!!! i couldn't rly read han's expressions so idk if he actually mind or not the fact that i've just invited dayah over without asking him if it was ok but i guess he was ok w it??? bc he didn't seem to be showing any form of displeased during the whole journey to onekm. but u know what's the best thing of today? DAMN han actually waited for like me to end work today omg *cries tears of joy on the inside* and he hung around the store for a bit as well!!!! so i literally get to spend the whole day with him omg except i had to remain professional most of the time but ahHhhhh i love it!! just his presence alone makes my heart skip hehe (ꈍᴗꈍ)ε｀*) and then he tried on a couple pieces of clothing and fuckinG hell he i just can't deal w how good he looks in a plaid flannel man like doOoOdddd he looks foKin good so boyfriend look sia!!!!!!!! ok and then i was like i'm gonna buy this for u mi bb do u want it!!!! n he was like naaWww don't waste money i don't rly need it now but i was like????? fOK idc imma get it for u beb and he's like nooooo but he finally relented and was like ok fine fine hehe ok then fast forward ah to ending work time we had to tidy up everything then i asked him to help me put in the tags haahhaah and he rly did aiyo this boyo so qt i should pay him in kisses (alr did ;) heheeh) ok then he had to wait outside for me cus we officially close at 10 so he waited an hour for me omg fk i think his whole rs w me just consist of him mostly waiting for me sia hais but ok then U KNOW WHAT OR NOT WAH RLY DAMN SAD someone stole his recently bought clothing from the store wah damn dog istg if i catch that person i will ask him or her if she's rly that fokin poor to steal cb go work la!!!!!!! ok but then he said he dunno if he misplaced it then someone took it or smth but i was like???? even if u misplaced it that someone could have returned it to the lost and found area OR SMTH BUT NO THAT PERSON TOOK IT HOME WAH FK I WAS DAMN PANAS want to hurl abuse then i kinda took it out on the security guard lmaO sorry but idk la in the heat of the moment u know but money v precious now cannot anyhow throw. then after that we were walking to the bus stop n then han was like eh u suddenly so calm only and i was like ya i realized that nothing can be done even if i'm angry lol then he's like ya see this is why guys can handle things rationally unlike girls bc y'all let ur emotions take control of u (smth liddat ah idk) then i'm like????? ugh can't fight back bc it's true at least for me la. oh and the HAN PAID FOR THE TOPS ON HIS OWN ALSO OK like?? ok la one of it he wanted to buy for himself but the other one i meant to buy it for him omg like u know first pay gift (even tho its still about 6 more days till my first pay hahaha but since we're alr there then like advanced ah hehe) AND YA IDK LA JUST V ANGRY OK JUST NOW ok then we took the bus back and i asked him if i should get smth to eat then he's like "are u hungry?" and i was like nah just kinda wanna drink smth hahaahah and he was like lol?? bc i was alr holding onto a bottle of milk tea i bought before work. so we didn't get anything to eat or drink and then he sent me home!!!!!! oh and i also just started taking some fiber supplements today to help me with pooping regularly!!!!!! fuckin $70 for one box of 15 days fuck expensive but apparently to see any changes and rly have ur toxins in ur body rinse outta its intestines u gotta be on it for like 2-3 months at least wtf idk how long i must work to to pay for this expensive shit. and ya ofc i know i can just eat veggies but sorry fam ur girl isn't a fan of like 95% of veggies in the world ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ ok gonna end this post abruptly bc im tired and this getting way tooooo long + it's alr 4:15am now hahahaahahha thank you bb!!!!! for waiting for me all the time and esp today bc u had to endure 4 hours of waiting for me to end work :') OH AND DID U KNOW!!! when he sent me home i was like sorry u had to wait for so long for me to end work :(((( then he's like "even if you don't have work i'll still wait for u" smth along that line la but hehe so cheesy so sweet this boy!!!! ok time to sleep goodnight!!!!!!! i love you ♥♥♥

#adaywithhan #augustwithhan #010817