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jinruihokankeikaku · 10 months

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"The Forest of Ohmu" by Neon Genesis Evangelion Assistant Director Tsurumaki Kazuya

(Originally published in Eva Fan Club #2; the translation and any errors therein are my own. Needless to say, the translator does not necessarily endorse the ideas expressed herein - nor, perhaps does the original writer, given its format as an imagined dialogue.)

"This is our theme this time." "What? You say that as if you have a theme every time - in the first one, there wasn't any connection between the title and the content, now, was there? You just went and told some story about your childhood - what, are you trying to be some kind of author?" "No, no, not at all. That one became that sort of story because it had its title. Because, of course, it was written so as not to spoil anything, and the title was also meant to match Eva's, like a parody." "You're telling me to read too deeply into it, like with the main story? In that case, whether I like it or not, I guess it reminds me of Aum [Shinrikyo, a doomsday cult responsible for terrorist attacks at the time]. Of course, when we're talking about NGE, I can't overlook its 'synchronization' with Aum." "It's not 'Aum', it's 'Ohmu' [sapient insects that feature prominently in Nausicaä of the Valley of the Wind]. Well...it comes back to the same thing, though. The ones who say the forest needs help." "So, environmental issues. Nowadays, when people talk about ecology, it's become something of a worthy cause. I think that became mainstream sometime in the early 80s." "People who live in places like Tokyo might have a longing for the clear streams and forests, but being born and bred in the countryside, I'm just fed up with all that stuff." "Y'know, when I went home the other day, the road in front of my parent's place was paved." "Nice that it's more convenient now, isn't it?" "But if that whole area wound up as residential lots - I'm sure it won't, but still - if its appearance changed completely, I think I'd miss the way it was." "Look, that's just how it is, in the end. So when it comes to nature conservation, I can tolerate it so long as we do it according to our fancy - to the extent that we're doing it because it feels good. But soon enough it turns into talk about how it's more decent to live in the country, or how people are disordered organisms that are gonna screw up the Earth." "Hasn't that been self-evident ever since the 'Ecology Boom'? I think when people say things like 'protect the forests!' or 'don't pollute the seas!', they mean people ought to live like other animals do." "Yeah, but an organism is a system that wants to elevate homeostasis. We want to make ourselves less susceptible to the influence of the outside world. We want to take the ability to control our enviornment from nature. It's beastly, isn't it, to say things like 'Go home to the country!' ―I'm sure all living things, by nature, want to live in the big city." "No way. In the end, we're the ones who are going to be the worse off for destroying the environment. Really, our influence on the ecosystem shows up as deforestation, and marine pollution, and such. And more and more species are going extinct." "But, see, it's not as if Earth's environment has always been constant, what with things like the emergence of oxygen, and the ice ages; and nature has, at least, carried on these selection processes for billions of years. I'm sure bacteria are more than up to the task of 'living in nature'. So when people say that we ought to live in nature, we're overlooking something - overlooking the fact that people were, ourselves, born as part of nature."

#the evangelion annotation project #eva tomo no kai #tsurumaki kazuya

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taki-sensei · 7 years

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I need some advice. So I'm a trumpet player, I just started around 3 months ago and I have horrible anxiety about playing in band. When we are practicing I get so scared and I sit there and sometimes I can't even play. How do I get over that?

hi anon! sorry to hear this ;_; but there might be some ways you could go about dealing with this!

The first thing is to talk to your band director and let them know your situation. Tell them that this is a serious problem you have– make that very clear. Tell them they should not do anything to put you on the spot, embarrass you in rehearsal, or question you if you choose suddenly not to play.

The purpose of talking to your band director is to ensure that nothing happens in rehearsal that will make you even more nervous than you already are. For someone who already has anxiety about playing, being called out in rehearsal even once could be extremely damaging in the long term.

Next is to sit down and really, really take a hard look at yourself. You need determine where your anxiety is coming from. Usually it’s one of the below :

You’re anxious because you KNOW you can’t play your part very well.

You’re anxious because you THINK you can’t play your part very well (or you play well alone, but feel like you’re going to mess up if there are people watching.)

Somebody (or multiple people) in the band dislikes you, and you’re afraid they’re judging you.

You’re diagnosed with some form of anxiety.

You have good ol’ regular stage fright.

I have advice for dealing with all five below the break. (I’m using a break because this post will get kind of long. If it’s not one of those four, send me another ask and I’ll try to help.

1. You’re anxious because you KNOW you can’t play your part well. If this is what’s freaking you out, I think you ought to congratulate yourself first. Many beginning players lack enough self-awareness to grasp that they aren’t very good. This realization can be a driving force for you to improve! The best way to solve this is to PRACTICE HARD AND SMART. I have a list of clarinet-focused practice tips here (link), but a lot of them work for any instrument.

2. You’re anxious because you THINK you can’t play your part. Are you in that situation where you can play your band music at home, but once you get to rehearsal you’re terrified you’re going to mess up? A lack of faith in your ability to perform in a one-time-chance situation means you probably have poor consistency.

Consistency, for musicians, is EVERYTHING. Often the musicians that earn top spots in auditions aren’t the most talented, but they’re the most consistent. They know that if they have one shot to do it right, they can rely on a 90% chance they’ll pull it off perfectly. Won’t you be less nervous in rehearsal if you KNEW hat at any given time, you had a 90% success rate? Or even an 80% success rate?

Personally, I find that the best way to develop consistency is to keep a tally chart in a practice notebook. When you play your music at home, tally how many times you:

totally mess up,

play it kinda meh,

play it really well.

This way, after about a week of practice, you can get a good look at how likely you are to play well at any given moment. If your “really well” percentage isn’t very high, then that means you need to either practice MORE, or take your practicing more seriously. A good way to raise the “Really well” percentage is to remind yourself that EVERY NOTE YOU PLAY IS A PERFORMANCE. This way, you don’t get in the habit of goofing off on your instrument, or not taking your playing seriously, just because you don’t have an audience present. Remember that once you play a note, you can’t ever take it back– so make every note count!

3. People in the band dislike you.

Firstly, are you sure they really don’t like you? Or have you just not spoken to them enough? Try reaching out to your section members and casually letting them know that you get anxious sometimes (“Hey, sorry if this is kinda weird, but I get nervous in rehearsal so don’t judge, aight? I’d really appreciate that :) and trust me, I’m working on it!”) I can’t see why they wouldn’t be nice about it. If they tease you or do stuff to make it worse, tell them straight up that “you are REALLY not helping.”

If they actually don’t like you, and you know that for sure– I totally get where you’re coming from. I was terrified for two whole semesters in my college’s top band because people in there didn’t like me, and it made me so nervous to play. The best way I found to deal with that was to remind myself why I’m in the band. Why are you even in band in the first place? Something must have drawn you to trumpet, and drawn you to join. Why are you here, and why do you love music? If you can keep that reason in sight and in mind, you can overcome whatever drama there is.

If it is a serious problem with people disliking you, try direct conflict resolution methods, or even try telling your band director about it. Reach out for help.

4. You’re diagnosed with some kind of anxiety. I don’t think I’m qualified to help with this one, but you should definitely talk to your school counselor, or a medical professional. There isn’t a 100% chance that any of the methods I listed so far will help you with a chemical imbalance in your brain that is causing you distress. Tell someone, and ask for help.

5. Good ol’ regular stage fright– you’re gonna hate me for saying this, but here it is: stage fright never goes away. Ever. I was first chair clarinet in one of my university’s bands… and I’m 20 years old… and I still got nervous when I had to play a solo in rehearsal, or play a tuning note for the band. The best musicians in the world still get nervous on stage, or when performing for people. But that’s just part of the thrill of live music performance– the thrill of knowing there’s a chance you’ll mess up. If you can learn to embrace this feeling and practice hard enough that you can consistently play well, stage fright will affect you less badly over the years!

I hope this was helpful anon! Please send more asks if you have more questions, or I didn’t address the issue that’s really bothering you. Good luck with the trumpet, and good luck in band!

#band geek #concert band #marching band #musician #music major #trumpet #dci #drum corps international #reply

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