#I’m sorry Julie I’m sorry Buster. thankfully he is a sturdy fucker and both he and Bertie calmed down quickly once we got back on the main

[loptrcoptr]

Went on a trail ride with another girl I haven’t ridden with in a while l and said “hey let’s try this trail!” and then I nearly got us stuck in a fucking swamp

I literally said “haha, come on Bertie (my horse) it’s not like it’s quicksand” and then boom! it kind of WAS though and my pony is fat but she is small, so she got stuck up to her knees a few times but oh my god, poor Buster is a normal sized thick ol halter hog quarter horse boy and he almost went down. he sunk in on the left side up to his stifle. that’s like his hip man that’s like. Almost the butt. that was high-as-a-horse’s-hips mud. That was horse-thigh-gap-height mud. Oh my god.

This obviously scared the horse so then he scrambled out as best he could and he took his mom into a bank full of many sharp little trees and she almost came off and then had to get down and back him back into the mud to get him out and around the trees again

Was my horse as affected? No. Was I hit so hard in the face by tree branches that I bit my lip? No, but her horse reenacted the neverending fucking story for a minute there and she got pistol whipped by branches and I felt so bad 😭 in fairness, she never objected to exploring. not in fairness, it was absolutely my dumbass idea

This is why no one wants to ride with us, even when I try to have a chill walk-only lazy little trail ride I still manage to get us into some kind of chaos, because my riding style can only be described as Quaintly Unhinged™️

As pet tax, here’s my pony and her stupid stray dog she adopted, brave survivors of the sticky icky swamp

#no animals were harmed in the making of this shitshow only one cut on a human and the dog #who has more than nine lives- was fine and I have no idea how he crossed the mud he could’ve flown I was too busy trying to not fall #I’m sorry Julie I’m sorry Buster. thankfully he is a sturdy fucker and both he and Bertie calmed down quickly once we got back on the main #trail and headed home. but the worst part is? #I had fun lmao I do enjoy this kind of insane shit #one time I went riding with my horse’s girlfriend and her owner and homies just turned her mare into the Rio grande and started crossing #and my mare followed because she’s obsessed with hers and I had a proud ‘oh thank god other people are also crazy’ moment #meanwhile ellis #Bertie the pony #this is why it’s really rare to have good riding buddies that 100% enjoy the same stuff as you. first you have to get past all the issues #between disciplines and training styles etc. and be totally willing to mind your own business #and then you have to have similar ideas of what’s fun #my idea of fun is pounding a beer and galloping my little nag up a dirt road pretending I’m in Rohan #this as you can imagine is an acquired taste for most people lmaoooo