#I guess my headcanon for how Hisana/Aizen would go is petty vindictive exes who never actually dated

[cooliogirl101]

lmaooo toxic ex archetype, everything thinks something definitely went on between them behind the scenes and hisana resolutely denies this, not realizing it’s only making the rumors worse

LOL can you imagine when she actually faces him in battle:

“Oh and by the way, I donated your entire wardrobe to charity!” Momo yelled, whacking him on the chest with her zanpakuto (to add insult to injury, he wasn’t even bothering to dodge, instead telling her with a smile to, “Get it out dear, I know you want to”). “And I gave all your skin care products to Yachiru. She loved them, said they were delicious. That orange marmalade sugar scrub you love so much? It’s moisturizing the inside of her stomach right now.”

Aizen faltered the slightest bit. “You did what?”

“AND I burned your entire collection of tea leaves. Should’ve taken them with you when you left,” Momo continued savagely. “Don’t worry though, I didn’t want you to miss out so I saved some of the fun just for you.”

“Should we…intervene?” Izuru asked Hitsugaya awkwardly. Momo had begun pelting Aizen with teacups at this point.

“And just so you know, Hirako-taicho is better than you ever were!” Momo screamed off in the distance. Next to them, Shinji dropped his face in his hands with a muttered “please don’t bring me into this.” In fact, most of the shinigami on the field were determinedly avoiding eye contact.

“No,” Hitsugaya said in a deeply tired voice. “No, let’s just…let them work this out between them.”

#this is obviously crack pls don’t take it seriously #I guess my headcanon for how Hisana/Aizen would go is petty vindictive exes who never actually dated #who knew #exes au