#I gave myself a sticker for it next to the appointment note in my planner cause I have the same reward system as a 3 year old lol

[girlscience]

deleted youtube off my phone again, maybe it will stick this time. started duolingo japanese again, maybe it will stick this time. started doing math problems to relearn calc and physics, maybe it will stick this time. am going to the gym in the morning (psyched myself out this morning worried about time so I didn't go today), maybe it will stick this time. been working on keeping a clean kitchen, maybe it will stick this time. tried to get healthy(er) groceries yesterday, maybe it will stick this time. have actually read multiple books this year, maybe it will stick this time.... this isn't just a me problem right??? I feel like I am constantly spiraling around the things I want to do and never actually sticking to them. It's kind of exhausting.

#i am sitting at work daydreaming about running off to another country or making these huge wild changes and becoming my ideal dream self #but the thing is so much of that person is just 'does the things i say i am going to do' #or 'doesn't procrastinate on life' or other similar things #ACTUALLY writing that out I paused to make a car appointment I've needed to make for like 2 months so I am trying ya know #I gave myself a sticker for it next to the appointment note in my planner cause I have the same reward system as a 3 year old lol #but like... I could have gotten rid of all the stress and had this over and done with three months ago if I had done it then!! #instead it haunted me for Months.... #and literally everything I want to do to become that dream self is all achievable stuff!! nothing I have listed is outrageous or crazy #it's just don't procrastinate. work on my brain and body. don't spend 8 hours a day on my phone. (if you break it all down) #THATS NOT HARD STUFF WHY DO I KEEP FAILING AT IT