#I consider The Incredibles to be my gateway fandom to the Word Girl fandom | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

theimpossiblescheme · 3 years

Text

So one of my favorite musicals of all time turns forty today…

Funnily enough, my first exposure to anything even related to it was through a little magazine called Cricket. I genuinely don’t know if it’s still in circulation, but it was a children’s magazine full of short stories, poems, fascinating articles, and book recommendations. It was old enough that not only had some of my favorite writers as a kid contributed to it (I also owe my love of Lloyd Alexander to the magazine since he always wrote the “Old Cricket” editorials at the end of every issue), but my aunt had also been subscribed to it. One day, my grandma let me borrow an old Cricket record full of stories and poems being read out loud, and the last track on the second side was a poem by T.S. Eliot. The poem that would eventually become “The Song of the Jellicles”—“Jellicle cats are black and white, Jellicle cats are rather small…” I thought it was a cute poem, but I had no idea there was anything more to it than that.

A few years later—when I was about eight years old—I read that poem and a bunch of poems like it had been turned into what was once the longest-running Broadway musicals. As soon as my brain saw the words “Jellicle cats”, I immediately flashed back to that old Cricket record, and I decided I had to learn more. As luck would have it, my grandma also had a VHS of the 1998 Great Performances show. For a long time, I dragged my feet on watching it. What if it didn’t live up to the hype? What if they were really better off as poems and not songs and dances? How did you make an entire musical based on poems for kids, anyway? But one evening I finally broke down and put in the VHS. I still have all the previews on it memorized—one for the huge Andrew Lloyd Webber concert in Royal Albert Hall, one for Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat, and one for the movie The Borrowers. Then after a moment of silence, the overture started and the first glowing yellow cat’s eye appeared onscreen. Showtime.

What followed was an honestly life-changing experience. I’ve talked before about Cats being pure fantasy and escapism, and eight-year-old me had never seen anything like that outside of Disney movies. These were real people in these fuzzy, colorful costumes doing these incredible dance moves, performing magic tricks in real time, and transforming themselves into these fantastical creatures who sounded like humans, but behaved like cats. Real people who did this for a living—who went to work every day and got to become something else for hundreds of audience members to see. Who could make you laugh and cheer and cry while wearing fluffy wigs and painted stripes on their faces, and you never questioned it for a second. I marveled at Victoria’s ballet solo, Mungojerrie and Rumpleteazer’s double cartwheel, Mistoffelees’s sparkling coat, Jemima and Grizabella’s beautiful voices. And by the time the credits rolled, I decided I wanted to do this for a living. I wanted to be an actress and make this kind of magic happen myself.

For a few years afterward, I’m pretty sure I was “the Cats girl” to everyone I knew. I always talked about it, I had all the characters memorized, and I first discovered fandom and fanfiction thanks to dedicated websites (once I was old enough to have unlimited Internet access). I even tried to stage my own production of it in elementary school, starring myself as Grizabella and my best friend at the time as Victoria (it never got off the ground, and it wouldn’t have been legal anyway without the Really Useful Group’s permission). And of course, it was a gateway drug to the wonderful world of musical theater; I wouldn’t have found Phantom, Great Comet, or Man of La Mancha without Cats. It wasn’t until I was older that I learned what a strange reputation Cats had. People respected it, but no one really seemed to like it—it was just a weird, silly fluke of a show with a strange concept and no plot. Some even considered it the worst thing Andrew Lloyd Webber had ever written. It didn’t make me love Cats less, but it did make me feel more… self-conscious about it. Like it was something I needed to precede with an “Okay, hear me out…” or “I know, I know, but…” before mentioning it to anyone. So while I still loved the show, I talked about it a lot less.

Then, about a year and a half ago, the movie came out. And for better or worse, it got people talking about the musical again. I was absolutely dreading the amount of people who were going to come out of the woodwork and keep saying what I’d always heard—that Cats was a bad musical and its fans were deluded, and they were never going to give it an honest chance now because of the movie’s reputation. Hyperbolically awful reviews and video essays came out, all bashing the very concept of Cats, and I wanted the earth to swallow me whole. But then, a miracle happened. People started rediscovering the actual musical again. People started talking about how they’d grown up with the 1998 version just like I had. People talked about liking it—actually liking this funny little show with its poems and songs and elaborate choreography in service of a loose, highly metaphorical plot. Actual fans talked about how they loved Cats and saw multiple productions of it and cared about the dozens of characters just like I did.

And very slowly, I started talking to them. I started learning new things, like little bits of trivia and the names of different performers and exactly what a “non-replica” was. I made friends and talked about headcanons and favorite productions with them. I started writing again after a long dry spell. I rejoined my first fandom ever, this time with new people I could actually interact with instead of just leaving messages in a long-dead guestbook, and I had the time of my life. I’m still having the time of my life with everyone in the Cats fandom here on Tumblr, getting to share one of my oldest and greatest inspirations with people who feel the same way I do. So thank you guys—for liking my ficlets and headcanon posts, for introducing me to the Mexican and Italian productions, for saying such kind words when I needed cheering up, and for letting me be a part of it.

And thank you, Cats. For sparking my love of theater and everything it’s capable of creating. For being such a joy to watch and learn about even on my most depressing days. For being wild and unapologetic the way few shows are brave enough to be. And for holding a special place in my heart, now and forever.

#the schemer speaks #cats the musical #cats fortieth anniversary #I love this show and I don't care who knows it--it's been such a formative influence. <3

30 notes · View notes

gillzilla · 4 years

Text

A Treatise on the aTROSity, Including How Hope Came to Me in the Form of The Lego Movie 2, Knives Out, and Little Women

I will start out by saying that I have never made a real, detailed post on Tumblr, mainly because social media kind of scares me. But the Reylo community's amazing kindness, strength, openness, and willingness to speak the truth in their writing over the last week and a half is honestly what has gotten me through the heartbreak and depression caused by the stabbing in the chest that was this movie. I am one of the people who loves Kylo/Ben Solo because I have mental health conditions and an abuse/trauma history within my family, which is also why the holidays are hard for me, so a big thanks to the people in charge of the story for TROS for making it even harder this year. After a week and a half of legitimate mourning for the butchering of the themes of Star Wars and of all the characters, but particularly the sequel trilogy characters, I am ready to add my two cents to all that has already been written about this movie.

First off, I have not been a Star Wars fan for my whole life. My parents tried to introduce me to the original trilogy as a kid by taking me to see A New Hope in the movie theater for the 20th anniversary screening in 1997. I fell asleep for most of it and was terrified by the trash compactor scene, so you could say the movie did not resonate with me. It actually wasn't until Phantom Menace came out that I started to get attached to Star Wars. So many older fans love to shit on that movie, and it certainly has many flaws, but a lot of us who were around the same age as Anakin when that movie came out and are now adults have started to speak up about how the movie was a gateway into Star Wars for us. Anakin gave me a window into the Star Wars universe that I could understand and relate to. I could relate to Anakin being a kind-hearted kid who wanted to help others and just wanted adults he could look up to, and I liked the podracing scenes. As with every single other sci-fi/fantasy hero's journey story that I loved as a kid, I empathized with and related to a male hero. Now, the wooden dialogue/acting/directing of Attack of the Clones and the tragic ending of Revenge of the Sith that left me so emotionally devastated that I vividly remember calling my friend to tell her I was so depressed I couldn't focus on studying for my eighth grade English final, kind of took me out of Star Wars again. There had been a spark there, but at that point I figured, eh, I guess it's not really for me after all.

I didn't rediscover Star Wars until the end of the first semester of my freshman year of college. This was a very difficult time in my life, as I was in what I would now consider to be a mental health crisis that unfortunately lasted for five years because I was too ashamed and uneducated about mental health to seek out help. I was very, very lonely during that time. It was close to finals week and I was sick, so as I sat in my dorm room I decided, why not pop in those DVDs of the original trilogy that I got at Costco last month. After watching them, I remember thinking, "Why have I not been watching these my whole life???" The original trilogy hooked me after that point and I started watching the movies every year around Christmas in commemoration of my rediscovery of them.

I was just as surprised as anyone when I found out that Disney bought Lucasfilm and that they were going to make a sequel trilogy. I had thought there would never be any more Star Wars, so I was overjoyed, though tentative, because I knew that though I loved Star Wars, it also had a tendency to make missteps that were somewhat endemic to sci-fi/fantasy hero's journey stories, such as poorly written dialogue, emphasis on ridiculous plot points that took away from the deeper overall themes, lack of diverse characters, and objectification/misogyny against female characters (I do not like watching Return of the Jedi because I hate, HATE the Jabba's palace stuff for what they did to Leia, honestly they gave Leia nothing interesting to do in that whole movie basically, but that's a whole nother essay).

So I went into The Force Awakens not really knowing what to expect. But oh my god, was I blown away. I am not lying when I say that I cried for at least an hour after the scene where Rey and Kylo are both reaching out for the legacy saber and it goes to Rey as the music swells, oh my god. I FINALLY realized what it meant to feel seen in the stories that I loved. My whole life I had been attached to and empathizing with male heroes, because they were pretty much the only heroes out there. To see Rey as this amazing female heroine who was not objectified and was a compelling character with an intriguing backstory that I related to as a child with a trauma history who often grew up feeling lonely, and to see that she was going to be the main Jedi in this new trilogy, I was overjoyed. It gave me hope. And then, on top of that, we got Adam Driver. Need I say any more. So many people have written about what an absolutely incredible actor Adam is, and I swear he is the only actor who could have pulled off the role of Kylo/Ben. The first time I saw TFA I didn't catch all the nuances of the character and his dynamic with Rey, but something about him really intrigued me (and made me want to watch everything Adam had ever been in). My love for TFA led me to start investing time in the online Star Wars fandom, which I never considered myself to be a part of previously, as the fandom had always reeked of being a "no girls allowed" type of zone. I found out about amazing, female-led podcasts that I started listening to every week and whose hosts I value just as much as my friends. I also started following the Reylo fandom on Tumblr. Learning more about the mythology behind the sequel trilogy, including how the creators were writing Rey's story as a heroine's journey and her and Kylo/Ben as dual protagonists, added so much to my understanding of what was going on in the storytelling and gave me the words to describe why I was connecting with these stories so much. I can honestly say that Star Wars and the Reylo fandom generally have been instrumental in helping me to get through the last four years, which have been a very difficult and isolating period in my life.

And now I'm up to TROS. As so many have said, the vast majority of it is a steaming pile of trash. People have done such an amazing job of breaking down why this story and how it treated its characters and retconned the beautiful story and themes that Rian gave us in TLJ was so painful for us. Many have pointed out that this movie is a result of catering to the most toxic portion of the Star Wars fandom, the "dudebros." Going further, I want to state that, whether consciously or not on the part of the cis, straight, white, male writers/director/CEO of Disney, this movie is a reassertion of masculinist ideologies. I want to clarify that when I talk about "masculinist" vs. feminist ideologies, I am talking about how our society and culture defines "masculine" vs. "feminine" ideas, traits, etc. Gender has nothing to with biological determinism and is socially and culturally constructed. Masculinist ideologies include beliefs such as extreme individualism, competition, "us vs. them" dichotomies, and power and value being defined based on hierarchy, which necessitates the use of violence to perpetuate the hierarchy. Feminist ideologies include valuing community and collaboration, connection and empathy, the idea that every person has inherent worth regardless of their productivity, actions, mistakes, class, race, sexuality, etc., respect for all people, and an abolishing of hierarchies. Masculinist ideologies are those of the white supremacist hetero-patriarchy, which, as we can see playing out in various ways all over the world, has been rearing its head in a very obvious and ugly fashion the past few years (though of course it has been around for wayyyyy longer than that).

Anyone who has been reading the fantastic analyses of TROS by those in the Reylo community can likely see how TLJ and even the story as it was set up in TFA were communicating feminist ideologies. One big example of this is Kylo Ren/Ben himself as a character. As so many have eloquently described, this is a complex character that commits atrocities, but is shown to be a victim of immense abuse and trauma that was failed by everyone in his family when he needed them most. This is a character that, had he been able to have the full and well-written redemption arc that he deserved, would have had an extremely moving story of how toxic masculinity and masculinist ideology is destroying boys and men by keeping them from being full people who can express all of their emotions, be vulnerable, and be open to love and connection. Reylo resonates so much with me not because it is about Rey supposedly doing all the work to change Kylo in some sort of toxic, co-dependent way, but because Rey and Kylo/Ben were always equals to each other. They both pushed each other to be better, more whole people. The wonderful work that folks have put into analyzing the mythology behind the feminine and masculine symbolism in TFA and TLJ (again, to clarify, "masculine" and "feminine" being culturally defined terms), and even the more obvious original goal of the sequel trilogy for the force to finally be balanced by Rey and Ben themselves becoming balanced between dark and light all relate to these gender issues. Balancing the dark and light sides of the force is also about balancing the "masculine" and "feminine" aspects within themselves.

This is a beautiful message that has so many real world implications. In our world, for lack of a better term, everything "feminine" is basically shat on. Patriarchy hates anything "feminine." This is how sexism plays out, but it also has to do with the ideologies that we believe in, down to our basic understandings of empathy and whether or not people have inherent value. The world would certainly be a better place if the "masculine" and "feminine" were better balanced, specifically if "feminine," and feminist, ideologies were more valued. This is what makes TROS feel like a stab directly in the heart. This was a trilogy that clearly did have feminist messages, regardless of DLF's bullshitting about Star Wars being "for everyone." Star Wars has always been progressive, the original trilogy is about rebels taking on fascists for god's sake. DLF's pandering to the most toxic part of the fandom for TROS is therefore representative of a much larger cultural, social, and political battle that is going on around the world right now. We are at a turning point for humanity in which we are starting to face the devastation that has occurred due to masculinist ideologies being the most highly regarded and utilized by those in power, but those in power are also trying to maintain their power by strongly reasserting those ideologies. So I would argue that this is not just about one movie that I and many other people didn't like. This movie is a small representation of a much larger battle that we're fighting.

Now, that reassertion of masculinist ideology that was the stabbing in the heart of watching TROS has made me super, duper depressed for the past week or so because, as others have pointed out, it communicated to me that no matter how hard we fight, the white supremacist hetero-patriarchy will reassert itself and win in the end. It even re-triggered the pain I've felt over the past few years since our current president came into office in the U.S. However, as I near the end of this long treatise I would like to share the stories that gave me hope over these past few days. I re-watched The Lego Movie 2 the other day, and that story gave me hope. The "bad guy" in that story is a literal embodiment of toxic masculinity/masculinist ideology, and it ends with the male hero realizing that he doesn't need to sacrifice his humanity and connections to other people to be a hero, or even just to be a man. How to Train Your Dragon 3 also told a story about a male hero/leader that rejects masculinist ideology. Additionally, I was given hope by Rian's amazing movie, Knives Out, which I went to see solely because people on Tumblr recommended it (thank you folks!). Rian had a clear theme and vision for this story that was about exposing and dissecting what I would call "toxic whiteness," and what it does to a family and those around them. And lastly, I saw Greta Gerwig's incredible adaptation of Little Women today, and that gave me hope because one of its main themes is about the struggle that (cis, heterosexual) women have in asserting themselves as full humans with talents, dreams and goals for their lives outside of being in romantic relationships, but also wanting to have romantic relationships at the same time. As has been said by so many, "STRONG" WOMEN CAN FALL IN LOVE AND HAVE ROMANTIC/SEXUAL RELATIONSHIPS. Feminism is about giving all people the chance to be fully human, and for heterosexual women that includes being able to have a relationship with a man and still be valued and respected for everything that we are outside of that relationship. The above mentioned stories, and others (She-Ra, Dragon Prince, AtLA & Legend of Korra, I'm sure there are others) give me hope that there are creators out there that are communicating feminist themes, even in big-budget movies that lots of people go to see. We need more of this. Tied to this is that THE HEROINE'S JOURNEY OF THE SEQUEL TRILOGY SHOULD HAVE BEEN WRITTEN/DIRECTED BY A WOMAN/WOMEN. Folks, we need the opportunities to tell our own stories. All of the diverse folks out there, if you are a creator, please keep on creating! We need you out there and we value all of the beautiful, integral work that you do!

So in sum, I'm not going to let what happened with TROS ruin my love of Star Wars or of the sequel trilogy. The story belongs to the fans now, and there are so many of us out there to care for it. You better be sure that I will never stop speaking up about how wronged we were by TROS, that is the hill I will die on. But I am not giving up hope and I hope that you will also join me in not giving up hope. As Poe stated so well in TLJ (with one minor adjustment), "We are the spark that will light the fire that will burn the [patriarchy] down." End of treatise.

1 note · View note