#GO TO BED LARK YOU'RE DRUNKW

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out here seeing Good Omens fanart referencing Pride & Prejudice and I'm of course like "that is the WRONG pride and prejudice Aziraphale would NOT be picturing the 2005 movie with Kierra Knightly and Matthew Macfayden," which is true, but I must face the fact that Aziraphale would not be a fan of the 1995 miniseries with Jennifer Ehle and Colin Firth either. Aziraphale saw the 1940 movie and was so aghast that he has refused all such adaptions since, eschewing not only Miss Knightly and Miss Ehle but also poor forgotten Elizabeth Garvie (1980 miniseries) and sticking entirely to the book, because he is Aziraphale.

#good omens #pride and prejudice #go to bed lark you're drunkw

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My first job was at the grocery store that my parents shopped at during my entire childhood. I was just thinking about it and it wasn't until after I'd grown up and moved away that I realized it was. Rather Strange Actually.

So I think it was built sometimes in the 1960's, as what the builders assumed was the vanguard of a bold and innovative movement of urban design post highway boom. (Spoiler: it was not.) The highway was in a sunken trench next to the older railroad tracks. And they decided: let's build the grocery store OVER the highway.

I have created this diagram for your viewing pleasure:

So, in a move that would please modern urbanists, the store did come right up to the sidewalk (which in turn was on the edge of the little cluster of commercial development around the commuter rail station). There was a large parking lot next to it also along the sidewalk, but what can you do. The first floor of the building- at least most of the front of it- contained the small retail also beloved of modern urbanists.

In a move that would displease anyone conversant with the ADA act, to get to the actual grocery store, you entered a lobby in amongst the small retail, and were immediately confronted with an escalator going up and stairs going... well, both up and down, but in practice, down. Proceeding to the top of the stairs, you found the shopping carts, which never went outside.

So, you'd proceed with your shopping cart out to the produce section, which extended a fair way over the highway. from there it was a fairly normal grocery store actually. From inside you could not in fact tell that half the building was. Extended over the highway and supported by pillars. But it was.

Anyway. Once you finished your shopping you'd get in a checkout lane. And the cashier would, as normal, ring up your groceries. And the bagger would -- as I thought was a common and ordinary variation within normal until I was about twenty years old-- put your groceries in a sturdy metal bin that held about 3 bags of groceries. Then they would carry each bit over to the conveyor belt which took hem into the Mysterious Hole, and bring back another bin. Each bin was labeled with a three digit number. After you had paid, the cashier would hand you a stack of very sturdy plastic cards with those numbers on them. (They were hefty and pleasant to hold in the hand. A fond sensory memory.)

Then you'd go down the stairs, carrying your cards but no groceries.

Once safely ensconced in your car, you would enter. The Tunnel. Which ran at regular ground level under the grocery store, behind the urbanist-approved-small-retail, with the entrance in the parking lot. There, you would wait in the Car Line. And then, you (whether 'you' was the driver or 'you' was the small child lucky enough to be allowed to sit on the driver's side back seat and be entrusted with the cards, an honor and privilege to be taken in turns) would hand your cards to a strapping young man, who would then find your bins, and load your groceries into your trunk for you. Then you would proceed out of the tunnel on the other side, trigger the warning buzzer as you crossed the sidewalk, and get back on the street.

This was all VERY exciting as a child, but you know. in a normal sort of way. Highpoint of the week, really.

When I was 17 I got a summer job at this grocery store. I was a grocery bagger, which was a position that could NOT be combined with cashier, on account of managing the metal bins and bringing them over to the conveyor belt. At no point during this period of employment was I privy to the Mysteries Of The Hole, though I presume a hidden set of further conveyor belts was involved. I was also not employed in The Tunnel, as I was a minor (and I suspect, as allegedly A Girl, though of course this could not have been official policy in the late nineties and early aughts). I did at last understand that the cards were matched with the bins by the simple expediency of the strapping young men putting the matching card back in the bin before they sent them on the presumable Up Conveyor Belts.

When I was 19 and doing a share of the grocery shopping alone for the first time, I discovered first hand how incredibly untenable this system was when you did not have a driver's license. Seriously, I had SO much cargo room on my bike but I could only buy as much groceries as I could carry down the stairs at one throw. Super annoying.

I haven't been back in at least fifteen years. I wonder if they have self-service checkout lanes and how the fuck the system works with that. The area's gone from 'fairly well off neighborhood' to 'this area is inhabited by the fuckoff rich' so maybe they just adequately staff their checkout lanes and charge out the nose for it idk. Perhaps someday I will return just to find out, but probably not.

I still do drive under the produce section from time to time though.

#go to bed lark you're drunkw

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Hate the whole "oooh he's so secure in his masculinity" thing . I mean first off yeah I'm not secure in my masculinity (on account of being gendered female by others for forty years) what of it. And secondly really? The moment someone you think is a guy acts gnc the only way you can think to approve of it is that it's somehow showing that he's actually super masculine? Fuck off.

#go to bed lark you're drunkw

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Sometimes a family is a defense attorney and prosecutor and a defense attorney and a defense attorney and a magician and a prosecutor and a great thief and a prosecutor and a spirit medium and another defense attorney and a rockstar who is also a prosecutor.  And a potted plant.  probably some more lawyers in there idk i lost count.

#ace attorney #go to bed lark you're drunkw

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Ugh ok you know I understand that.  Talking To Dragons was the first of the books published  (enchanted forest chronichles by patricia c wrede) and thus Dealing with/Searching for/Calling on Dragons were technically prequels.  So Cimorene marrying King Mendanbar was a foregone conclusion from the start.  It was unavoidable. And in a watsonian perspective. I have nothing against the man. if I was Cimorene’s friend in real life I’d be all like “hey, glad u found someone to marry who meets your parents’ expectations thus somewhat mending the rend betwixt you but who you also genuinely both like and love” but. 

BUT. 

Thematically.  From the themes of the book. Cimorene just ~happening~ to find an appropriately aristocratic husband (just a cool magic one who isn’t a pompous asshole) after she took such risks to get away from all that SUCKS MAGIC DONKEY SHIT. Nearly thirty years from my first reading later and I’m STILL mad at that even though king mendanbar is objectively a total hottie and I’d do him.  Here is a list of better people for Cimorene to have wound up with, thematically, than King Mendanbar:

Morwen.  Obviously.  (I forget how old she was so if necessary in this alternate version she can be younger if necessary to not make the age gap creepy but I recall the vibe being reasonable there). 

Princess Alianora

Kazul

I dunno like. Some wizard’s son? Who was all like “hey this is bad actually, I do not want to despoil the magical environment and make dragons sneeze. I’m gonna make a clean break with my family and learn to be a witch instead” (Not in a transgender way just in a learning different magical techniques without regard to traditional gender roles)

...fuck it, same but actually in a transgender way.

I forget if being a witch was gendered in those books or if it was just that wizards specifically were patriarchal.  or what. I remember about gender shit in those books was that dragons got to choose theirs and I was SO fucking jealous.  They’d grow in 2 or 3 horns depending which they picked. 

Seriously though, Kazul?

Nobody at all because like.  Yes some people are aroace and even if you are not.  You might still wind up happy just having a life where you’re managing the royal library and chilling with your witch friends and dragon friends kwim??? She SAID she doesn’t want to get married at all. maybe she’s not just objecting to the asshole knights and princes and actually does not want to get married. 

OK I realize that the Kazul thing might just be me being a monsterfucker but. Please.

Some random guy. Any guy who is neither a knight nor a prince or king or duke or whatever.  (And who treats Cimorene right obvs.)  Maybe a nice scribe, or an assistant chefyou know, who can groove with her interests.  Like I know it awfully looks a lot like I’m pulling for Cimorene to be in lesbians but that’s just because the only acceptable men I recall from the books are the knight whats-his-name who marries Princess Alianora and uh. King Mendanbar.  Who as we have established is cool if we were talking about real life but we’re talking fiction and we’re talking Themes.  by the Themes it’s ok if she marries a guy as long as he is absolutely an unnacceptable match for a princess.  Though the ex-wizard would be better because they’d have matching baggage. 

Though if we’re talking Themes then Cimorene being a lesbian is just making the subtext text. I don’t know. Maybe I’m projecting?  Am I projecting?

I’m not even a lesbian!!!   I wanted to be a dragon. Preferably one that could shed and re-grow horns at will.  Or has like five of them because fuck you that’s why. 

Cimorene should wind up in a polycule with Morwen and a dragon with five horns fight me

the dragon with five horns also fucks king mendanbar. And Kazul

in conclusion, I should not be this drunk on 1 (one) glass of wine. Thank you for your attention to this matter. 

#GO TO BED LARK YOU'RE DRUNKW

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“BAMBOO FABRIC” IS RAYON. IT’S JUST FUCKING RAYON. THERE’S NOTHING WRONG WITH RAYON BUT IT’S JUST. FUCKING. RAYON.  YOU CHEMICALLY MELT DOWN CELLULOSE FROM PLANT MATERIAL AND EXTRUDE IT.  THE DIFFERENCES FROM WHETHER YOU’RE USING SCRAP BAMBOO OR SCRAP PINE FOR THIS CELLULOSE ARE MINUSCULE COMPARED TO OTHER VARIABLES IN THE MANUFACTURE PROCESS. 

#GO TO BED LARK YOU'RE DRUNKW

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I am drunk and so is ccrowley??  thank. 

#go to bed lark you're drunkw #good omens #i mayb e impared but my drawng tablet? WOLKring111 #alcohol for ts//////// #A GOOD SNeK #a drunk snake demon or drsnemon

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I AM LARK

I SIT IN THE DARK

I’M HOLDIng A SHARK

#go to bed lark you're drunkw

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Reblog if you thing the girl on the left and the girl on the right are both equally beautiful uwu   (◡‿◡✿)

#sewing machines #Singer 66 #juki ddl-8700 #go to bed lark you're drunkw

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Ugh so there is like one study out there saw cited from a few years ago about the efficacy of different materials for making homemade facemasks for reducing viral spread and like. I realize it was just one study and it’s not like they were doing it in-depth but comparing “pillowcase material” and “cotton t-shirt” and “cotton-poly-blend t-shirt” material is... so not useful.  What’s the yarn size? What’s the thread count? Was the cotton-poly blend more effective because of the fibre content or because of another difference between the two fabrics?  Why didn’t you test some standard quilting broadcloth, the kind of fabric that most people in America who have a sewing machine they can use comfortably have a stash of that they compulsively add to every time they go to a fabric store and therefore have plenty of on hand in the event of a poorly prepared for pandemic? 

I mean the overall answer is “you’re basically looking at a 40%-60% reduction in droplet spread for most reasonably tightly woven non-specialty fabrics, compared to the 95% of fda-approved medical masks”  and I guess worrying too much about optimization isn’t useful if your goal is to just add another layer of risk-reduction for non-medical essential activities but like.  Textiles have properties. it’s a thing.

#go to bed lark you're drunkw #covid-19 posting sorry///

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I LOVE MY SPOOSE

#go to bed lark you're drunkw #(drunk on half a glass of wine because it's just that kind of day) #anyway i should go to bed to cuddle my spoose

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I’m sorry Mr. Lavery but the opinions opined in Emma from Emma discusses Women’s Pajamas are objectively and demonstrably wrong, specifically the part calling out women’s fashions of the 1820′s and 1830′s as somehow more attractive compared to those of 1795-1810 or so.  The 1830′s.  The only woman in England dressed in a remotely attractive manner in 1830 was Anne Lister, sorry, this is just objective fact.  If you’d brought up the 1850′s, or compared to the earlier 18th century, you’d have a point (also both those eras have the advantage that if you’re wearing women’s clothing of having giant fuck-off skirts that will allow you to Socially Distance yourself from everyone simply because your panniers/crinoline respectively are in the way, which is the only reason to ever wear women’s clothing, what is the POINT of wearing skirts if they’re not going to keep everyone at a nice respectable three feet away from you, I ask you) but, sorry. the 1830′s?  No. All credibility lost.  1830′s is like, PEAK “the men’s clothing is great and the women’s is hideous,” it is the era I specifically point to as the last time that was the case in 500 years of european and european-derived fashion. 

#I'd tag this #go to bed lark you're drunkw #but I haven't actually drunk any alcohol whatsoever tonight I'm just in A Mood

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Competent leftists: applying Marxist theory appropriately to better understand the world and better decide what actions to take. 

Me: Are...  Are rats lumpenproletariat???

#go to bed lark you're drunkw #all surfaces to be covered with rats

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All surfaces to be covered with all surfaces to be covered with rats. 🐀🐀🐀✒️🐀🐀🐀

#all surfaces to be covered with rats #rats #calligraphy #drunk calligraphy #good omens #go to bed lark you're drunkw

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It‘s really ridiculous how car-dependent everywere but the biggest/densest/most expensive cities in the USA are when like.  They really don’t have to be.  Right now I live in a small city of 17,000 ppl. It’s the county seat of a fairly rural area consisting mostly of forest (state parks + lumber), some farmland, and a few dozen towns of 100-2000 people.  And if there was, like, hourly-ish train service on the train tracks that already exist and are horribly underutilized*, coming from Vermont south to a few other small cities and then a medium city where you could connect east to the monstrosity that is the greater Boston metropolitan area, i.e. if there was train service that was utterly average for many parts of Europe and Asia, it would be completely reasonable for about 1/4 of the households in this town (including mine) to not fucking own a car without it being a major sacrifice.  And that would be enough to justify sufficient local bus service to let most of the rest of the multi-adult households be one-car households.  But noooooooo. 

(the barrier is lower here in New England than points west, since a lot of areas were in fact built up around railroads that have since fallen into disuse, which means that many towns do have real walkable town centers with an underused/abandoned train station in them.  And since the town I’m in is 20 miles north of a conglomeration of colleges, that means we’re 20 miles north of a bunch of towns that already have decent bus service that it would be nice to be able to take a train down to.  Which just makes it all the more frustrating that it isn’t happening.) 

#go to bed lark you're drunkw

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All surfaces to be covered with rats

All surfaces to be covered with rats

#all surfaces to be covered with rats #go to bed lark you're drunkw