#Fun fact: this also applies in many many cases if you were born abroad to a US parent and have never even been to the US!!! | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

hellorickturner-blog · 4 years

Text

Daniel Carpenter Taking Things to a New Level

Daniel Carpenter is far from your average senior. He doesn’t take life slow or easy, in fact when most people his age begin to become less active, Daniel Carpenter speeds his life up. So what makes this 64 year old, retired army captain, licensed private investigator, and former professor with a PH.D. in Drama do for fun? The answer may surprise you. Currently, Carpenter is learning MMA and pursuing a career in Rap! Rap Music to be precise and like everything Daniel had ever applied himself to he’s giving it 110%.

Carpenter was born on November 5th 1955 in the back of a farm truck on route 315 in Simsbury, Connecticut (a suburb of Hartford) on the way to the hospital, in a thunderstorm. Already an unusual start to this extraordinary man’s life, at the age of five, he was already showing incredible abilities. Carpenter wrote and performed a cello concerto featured in a local town’s christmas pageant. He was also known to be incredibly athletic, competing against boys much older then he in the annual township’s swim competition. “I was about five or six around that time and the high school swim coach noticed me swimming laps in the pool one summer, he said that I swam faster and better than most of his varsity swim team members. Even at that age, I found his remarks to be humorous because I has practically taught myself to swim” Carpenter remarked. Carpenter was known for his confident and competitive nature throughout his early school years and that reputation continued throughout his highschool career. Voted most likely to succeed in his senior yearbook, Carpenter was a force to be reckoned with. He was the varsity wrestling team captain, school newspaper editor, the star of the debate team and the class president. “I never wanted to have a reason to look back and regret not trying something” Carpenter reflected, “I wanted to make sure I had gave everything a shot.”

In December 1973, Carpenter enlisted in the army to fight in Vietnam. He had just turned 18 and answered to call for young men to join the fight. “I didn’t particularly agree with the war, but I felt a deep sense of patriotism and I could not ignore it.” Over the next three years, Carpenter excelled through the army ranks starting as a private and leaving Vietnam as Master Sergeant. Carpenter did not wish to elaborate much on his experiences in Vietnam, stating “I never speak about it with anyone except for the men who were there… they are the only ones who understand.”

After the Fall of Saigon, Carpenter was airlifted out of Vietnam with the remaining troops in the spring of 1975. He returned home to Hartford, Connecticut just before his 20th birthday. While home, Daniel met a woman by the name of Nancy Slater while eating breakfast at a local diner. They began dating. “I knew when I met her that she was something special and I had to marry her,” said Carpenter. Unfortunately after only a few months home Carpenter was called to duty. He left for West Berlin in February of 1976 and his plans to marry Nancy Slater were put on hold. Despite the distance between Carpenter and Slater he kept true to her and wrote her almost every day. “I was in love, and it hurt to be away from her but I knew the oath I took and that this sacrifice was for the good of my country.”

Over the next 3 years Carpenter was stationed in West Berlin at the doorstep of the Soviet Union during the height of the Cold War. He once again refused to give details about his time abroad, however his reason this time was different, claiming that details of his service during that time is still to this day classified. “I was stationed in West Berlin for almost 3 years, and it was not pretty, let’s just leave it at that,” said Carpenter with a careful chuckle.

Carpenter returned home in 1978 around Christmas. While in West Germany he had bought an engagement ring for his girlfriend Nancy Slater. Carpenter having risen to the rank of Captain decided to leave the army to get married. He proposed to Nancy on New Years Eve of that year and by May of 1979 they were married. “I was so happy, however my appetite for accomplishment was a problem, I couldn’t sit still.” Around this time Carpenter began working at a local factory which built plumbing parts. “Nancy could see that I was not happy working at a factory, however we had a baby on the way and we were saving for a house.” Over the next several years the Carpenters would have 4 children. Daniel would change jobs three times and eventually become a licenced private investigator. Opening an office in on 42nd Street in Manhattan in 1981. “I loved being a gumshoe… meeting all the interesting people and all the adventures and at that time the city was a much seedier and gritty place.”

When cases were slow Carpenter, an avid chess player would search the city for chess players to fulfill his need for competition. Carpenter became a known chess player in the army. He played all sorts of people and allegedly defeated a famous East German Chess Master while on a diplomatic assignment east of the wall. “I would tell Nancy I was working late and would scour the city for best chess opponents I could find. It sounds crazy but it kept me sharp. I loved playing the bums around the port authority. Those guys sometimes we’re better and smarter than some of the professional players. Some of those fellas were undercover savants.” “I sat on the sidewalk of 43rd and Broadway once for 3 hours playing this one guy by a dumpster, over and over again… and I could not beat him.” “I would sometimes have an epiphany during a match and run back to the office after the game to work on the case.”

In 1986 a client of Carpenter’s was unable to pay in full for his investigator services and offered him two tickets to see CATS. The wildly popular Broadway show had been out since 1981 and was still the highest grossing show in New York. Carpenter accepted the tickets and brought his wife to see the show. “I was immediately enthralled and had to have more, I started taking Nancy to all the Broadway shows… La Cage Aux Folles, 42nd Street, Drood, Sweet Charity… she loved them and so did I. So much so I stopped chasing down chess players and started studying theatre.”

Over the next few years Daniel Carpenter would earn a PH.D. in Drama and become a performing art professor at the local college in Nashua, New Hampshire. It would be here that Carpenter would stay as a professor for many years before retiring in 2014. “My four children have given me 11 grandchildren so I wanted to spend more time with them.”

If you think that in the last 5 Years of retirement that Daniel Carpenter has slowed down, you have another thing coming. Daniel Carpenter has already earned a blackbelt in Kempo, won the county chilli cookoff two years in a row, hosts the annual christmas tree lighting ceremony at his church, directs the community theatre troupe and has taken a stab at philanthropy. Daniel Carpenter started a non-profit foundation that funds theater programs in underprivileged school districts. He has even brought famous retired stage actors to guest teach theater. However Carpenter didn’t stop there, this upcoming year Daniel intends to begin competing as an amateur MMA Fighter in a local circuit. “People often remark about how young I look although I’m in my mid-60s and despite all I do. I tell them it’s a gift and a curse, sometimes I wish I could just sit still and enjoy retirement like most people my age, but I can’t. It drives my wife crazy.”

Now Daniel Carpenter is attempting to enter the rap game, but not for the fame but for his charity work. “I was driving down three-o-five right where I was born in Simsbury and heard this advertisement for a Rap battle in Hartford for a prize of twelve-thousand dollars… and I thought to myself about how that money could be used for good.” Unfortunately for Carpenter he was too late to register for last years tournament however he is hopeful he will win the 2020 competition. “My kids think I’m crazy and I don’t blame them, everyone has thought I was crazy at one point or another.” When asked about how his progress in rap Carpenter declined to elaborate stating “I can’t give you the secret to my sauce before the taste testing,” and carpenter knows a thing or two about taste testing, his busy wall of trophies and awards features his “Annual Chilli Cook-Off — 1st Place” awards for 2014 and 2015. “The way I see it is… this is a mix of everything I know. Music, Drama and Chess.” When asked why chess Carpenter remarked “Chess is pure strategy and rhythm, knowing your opponent and exposing their weaknesses… and knowing the right moment to strike… like martial arts too I suppose… it’s a discipline.”

Carpenter has sure been active in retirement and it seems anything that this 64 year old husband, father, teacher, soldier, detective, chess player and philanthropist puts his mind to he accomplishes. Carpenter shares that the secret to his life of success and accomplishments is having dreams. “Never forget how to have you imagination, never forget that your only limitations are what you let limit you, working hard at something you like… isn’t hard.” Carpenter hopes his wacky and eclectic life story will inspire others to take the first step. commercial interior design california

1 note · View note

lookatthedawn · 6 years

Text

“Home, Home Again,

I like to be here when I can...”*

It's bittersweet to come home because I feel like a great adventure has come to an end. But perhaps it's not so. Perhaps a greater adventure is to live life with dignity, courage, and authenticity. Many issues expect me at home, from a personal level to total national chaos. There's much work to be done. After an uneventful flight, I land on JFK. The immigration officer peruses my passport and says, with a smile, "you're a world traveler!" "Not exactly, not yet," I answer, humbled by the thought of my friend Anush, who really is a globetrotter. Through the app Find Friends my son JeanLuc finds me waiting for my luggage. He has grown in my absence, his beard has thickened and he looks more mature overall. I hug him, smell his scent, listen to his heartbeat -- resting my cheek on the best place of the Puniverse, as I used to say when he was tiny. We meet my daughter Katrina in the car, and she's driving and that's good, because she's not into hugging. She does make an exception for birthday and Christmas, though, sweet thing that she is. In the car, we share stories of the last two months, but not much, since I don't want to repeat everything I want to say when we're finally all together. After three hours or so I'm home, seeing the rest of the family, which includes four new pets! It's when I hug my oldest son Marcelo, though, that I break down and start to cry because I'm so happy to be home and I've missed them all so much! Knowing his mother as he does, he has a surprise for me, which is a huge map on the wall, where we have fun placing color-coordinated thumbtacks on the places we've been. During my time away I didn't allow myself to be homesick, because that would only take away from my experience abroad, but being around them all is like heaven -- or maybe heaven is just another word for home. Key Takeaways: 1) An internship reveals as much about ourselves as the path we're contemplating taking. Sometimes a job is more glamorous from a distance than in the thick of it. Interning at the company of one's choice allows for an inside look at the day-to-day business. What did I learn at The Gioi? I learned that editing is hard, not only for me but for everyone. It takes work, and it's not always fun, but if making a messy paragraph shine appeals to you, then the time sitting and staring at a computer screen is worth it. However, -- and here's the takeaway -- now I know that I can do it. I can write and I can edit. Maybe that's not as surprising to anyone as it is to myself. I don't like to write all the time, and I don't like to edit always, but the work satisfies in me a deep need for connection and self-expression. I could say that I write to understand, and I edit to be understood. Or something like it. Working at The Gioi showed me that the final product on a magazine shines because of hours of intense, laborious and boring work the staff is willing to put into a piece. Editing is work done both alone and in collaboration with a team. I worked alone at my desk, but I was just one of the many hands those texts passed through before becoming ready for print. Although separated, we had the same goal; make a text as good as possible. 2) The pros of living alone. I think everyone should live alone at least once in their lifetime. If not completely alone, with busy roommates. I did not live alone before getting married and starting a family of my own. I wish I had. By living alone you learn to become self-reliant. If you fail, you deal with the consequences, and the next day you do better. If you leave your bed unmade or a carton of milk outside the fridge, when you come home it's there, just the way you left it, or, in the case of milk, spoiled as a consequence of your negligence. No judgment from anyone, but no helping hand either, so it functions like a straight look in the mirror when we contemplate ourselves and all our shortcomings. Being so, living alone teaches humility, self-reliance, and confidence.

Another great thing about living alone is that you have a better chance of following your plans without being derailed. If you decide to sleep instead of reading or watch a movie instead of sleeping, that's up to you, and if you regret your choice the next day, that's also your problem, and you know you can't peg it on anyone around. A subtler aspect of living alone is that you learn to manage your emotions, as there aren't people around to distract you from your feelings. Nobody makes you mad, for example, you get mad all by yourself, with thoughts you choose to have. That, I believe, is always the case, but when you're alone that becomes undeniably clear. You must rely on yourself as a source of wisdom, comfort, inspiration, entertainment and anything else you need. 3) Perspective. We have to leave sometimes. Leave a relationship, leave a house, leave a job, a country... in other to see it better. If by diving into something we take a closer look, by moving away from a situation, we see it in an entirely different angle. While in Southeast Asia, I didn't hear about Trump's latest tweets. It wasn't news, it just didn't matter for them what the POTUS said, did, or said he did or didn't do. It was so refreshing! I also learned that most people in that part of the world are not as scared of North Korea as they are of the United States. Well, considering our mutual history, can we really blame them? This same bird's-eye view I can apply to enlighten aspects of my personal life. 4) Traveling is an art, and, as with watercolor, writing or pottery, the more you practice the better you get at it. There are many kinds of travelers, and internship, work, or studying abroad have its own implications, but overall, leaving home reveals your identity as a traveler. What places are you attracted to, what do you want to see, what do you want to do? Do you travel to escape, to rest, or to learn? Do you find a cozy place and make yourself comfortable as you watch the natives from a peephole? Or do you mix with the locals, learn a new language and try new things? I admire the latter, but I'm not an extrovert, so I don't throw myself into a new situation. I also don't hide from the wonderful opportunity to see new things, meet new people, eat different foods and do different things. Whenever I travel, though, I realize that I need to do so more often. Since traveling, by definition, is a state of transition, I want to learn to move more gracefully from one point on the planet to another. That's the art in it, the dance in the storm, so to speak. And as in every art, if you do just what you plan, what's the art in that? More important than following through some preconceived idea, is to be present in the moment. 5) So, there's the saying that "if you cut too many corners, you end up going in circles". Another reminder says that when you cut a corner, you end up with two more. In Brazil, we say that, by trying to avoid taking one step, we take two. That relates to my attempts at cutting costs. No matter how much one plans, when traveling there are always spur-of-the-moment decisions -- or there should be if you're living in the moment -- and cutting costs is an important practice if you're on a budget, but not every dime saved makes sense. Sometimes it's okay to take a cab, even when there are buses available. Sometimes it's okay to go to a restaurant, even when you can cook at home or get an inexpensive meal on the street.

6) Skin Shedding. Closely related to this new perspective, is the shedding of skin, the throwing out -- or letting go -- of what is no longer working for you. I got sunburnt in Phu Quoc Island, which led to probably the worst itch I ever had and later, to skin shedding. Although the process was far from pleasant, it symbolized a very special time in my life, when I'm letting go of much that I thought was part of my identity. I'm renewing myself. The process is both painful and beautiful. You cry for the skin to which you were once so attached which now brings you more discomfort than anything else. So you let it go. Then one day you look at your shoulder and see that the new skin is clear, healthy, and beautiful. You've been born again! 7) Completely different, but just as good. By the time you travel alone, be it for an internship, to study abroad or any other reason, you're probably over the age of eighteen and might have developed a philosophy of your own. But as you immerse yourself in another culture you realize that other people do things differently, sometimes exactly the opposite of what you think is right. That's a great opportunity to develop some humility. Yes, your philosophy is great, but mostly for yourself. If people in a different part of the world do things differently it's either because it's the only viable way in that environment or because it's working for them. And here's the takeaway: study different angles of your own idea. Learn, expand your views, enlarge thine soul. 8) Think Abundance. I have spoken extensively about it while talking about what I call scarcity mentality. This experience was a great way to immerse myself in a culture that prides itself on making do with less. It is a fact that in the United States there is too much waste, and better management of resources is something that we must learn, but sometimes that scarcity mentality can become a way of life, part of the culture and it stops making sense. To think abundantly is to understand that resources are always available, but if you go to the ocean with a spoon, that's how much water you'll get. Saving is good and must be encouraged, but shouldn't be the modus operandi. A better goal, in my opinion, is to do the best you can with what you have. 9) Order and Progress. It's pretty clear that basic organization leads to better planning and better execution. Traveling through Southeast Asia constantly reminded me of that. Some schools teach this but it must be reinforced by the culture, with social expectations and policies in public places. Brazil, for example, dwells in chaos. The culture deals with that aspect of its people, reinforcing it with cliches like "o jeitinho brasileiro", (the Brazilian way), which allows for creative loopholes in every sphere of society. Other cultures, such as the Japanese and Chinese, pride themselves in cleanliness and order. Good fruits come from such values. And that's what this trip reminded me to do; better observe organization in my own life. 10) I've always believed that people should leave their country of origin and live in another place for at least a year. This experience only reinforced that belief. I can't think of anything else -- except, maybe, parenting -- that changes one's perspective as much as immersing into another culture. Everything you know and take for granted, like the language spoken around you, the food, the currency, social values, all that changes but you, at first, remain the same. It's like taking a piece from one puzzle and mixing it up with pieces from another puzzle. At first, there's no place for that piece in that society and you feel extra and useless. Little by little you learn to assess your surroundings and learn new things. Learning happens when we modify ourselves. Without change, there is no learning. And this learning reshapes you, so soon you find that you do fit into that society. People count on your presence, on your input, and on your contribution. You don't stop being who you are, you just enlarge your worldview to accommodate new perspectives.

"It's all worth it if the soul is not small", wrote Portuguese poet Fernando Pessoa. However, the soul, like the body, needs food for growth. Traveling, reading, experiencing life in all its colors, shapes, and sounds, broaden our existence and deepen our understanding and therefore must be highly encouraged. I'm proud of Mount Holyoke College -- and immensely thankful -- for the college's efforts to provide students with experiences of this kind.

1 note · View note

noheroes-allowed · 4 years

Text

boston baby

aka I’m a dumbass

I literally deleted all the text of my old post bc I’m a fucking idiot. so now my idiocy stems from not only my inability to stop liking this boy but also my fucking incapability of navigating this site. and my stubbornness in having this post to look back on so I have to write it again which sucks bc I spent like 3 days on the last one. again --- I hate that I put so much weight on our interactions. I hate that I have this need to remember it all. I remember in freshman year when I liked this guy I wrote little clues to myself and I was sure I would remember them. and I liked that it was something I knew but no one else could really guess if they just saw single, independently floating words. but I looked back on them last fall and I had no idea what half of them were. I suppose it’s a good sign that I’ve officially moved on, no ache in my heart that I couldn’t remember, only a little nostalgia. and then when I found the clues I wrote in my notes app about keith from the first segc social I went to in like 2018, I didn't know what was going on either. in this case, it’s purely from bad memory. although I did write down that his favorite candy was sweet tarts, which he mentioned again this trip. I’m sure at one point in my life I will look back on this with only nostalgia and sentimentality and appreciate how much I’ve grown since the time of me writing this, at least I hope so. but for now, I know I want to remember these days. not just bc of my horrendously irrational crush on keith, but bc this trip was really fun. it might be the highlight of my semester. and at the end of it all, I did grow closer to these people and one individual in particular. even though I doubt he would like me back, at the end of the day, I still really enjoy his company and knowing more about him even in the friend capacity. so this is my completely rational justification, and I will try not to feel bad about myself.

I looked back on an unsent letter I wrote about him over winter break just now. it’s crazy how much closer we are now than we were just two months ago. a lot of the content was actually about how I wish I could get to know him more. to hear his laugh and see his smile, listen to his stories and adventures. to know more about him and for him to want to know more about me. it’s amazing. I actually got to do exactly that this weekend.

there were so many little moments I appreciate and don’t want to forget. when he picked me up, he said something in the car that I couldn’t hear bc I was outside. but I think it was something like ‘do you want to sit in the front.’ but my mind was so set on sitting shotgun that I went for the door and when I asked him what he said he said he just couldn’t get the door open since it was locked the first time I tried. we were talking about behavioral econ since class was cancelled and serena asked me if I liked it and I said that I had been wanting to take it since applying to colleges. keith was surprised. and he said how he didn’t know why he picked the 9am discussion. and I said he could always go to a later one. but then he was like no it’s too late bc jaja is in it and you’re in it. even though jaja never shows up to class. ‘do you want to help me navigate?’ when we left Ithaca, maxwell and I were talking about Iceland, and I said all I wanted to do was see the northern lights. maxwell wanted to go snorkeling. then when everyone started doing their work since our car was deemed the work car, he turned to me and ‘tell me a story.’ literally I lit up inside when he said that bc he wanted to hear about me, and he never reciprocated back this question when I asked him the few times before our trip, and the specific wording bc that’s exactly how I ask him. everyone loves talking about themselves, even me. and I thought making the story-sharing a thing would make him happy since he could think back on some memories and I could learn more about him. it’s a win-win really.

we talked about maryland a lot. I think the first story I told was in 8th grade when we went to a museum in dc and we ran into neil patrick harris and our grade bothered him so much that he left. and then we got onto the topic of field trips and going to st. mary’s to learn about colonies. he thought it was weird that I took the school bus to school bc he only ever rode buses on trips. we talked about the aquarium and the science center and crabs and ocean city beach trips and just md. stupidly it made me appreciate md more.

anyway I told him about the trips I went on in high school, and how I slipped in the rain in disney and fucked up my elbow for weeks afterwards, and getting to see the backstage of the parks, and having to drive all the way there and sleeping on the bus, and how we went to london and nola. he asked me who I spent most of my time with in marching band. I asked him about his trips. his school took so many camping and hiking trips with everyone in the grade and that’s when he would pull his pranks. they went out to the eastern shore of maryland once and camped out in the grass next to the sand to learn about biomes. and this guy brought a hoverboard even though no electronics were allowed. and they started building a trench in the sand for no reason. he asked me if I ever had gone camping. I told him I camped on a beach in china when I was 12. and that my family used to go every year until my brother was born. apparently on another school trip two seventh graders were making out next to everyone sleeping bc they didn't even separate the boys and the girls. he said one time his friends and him ate really greasy foods and a milkshake from dq and he felt really gross afterwards.

we talked about books too, like what we read as kids. and I asked him about all the books I read in high school. he read hamlet and the great gatsby and tried to read pride and prejudice and not frankenstein and not the crucible. he watched the lion king in class too after hamlet. I told him I cried, and during the great gatsby, and was haunted by the clip from the crucible where everyone gets hung. he made a reference to percy jackson I didn't understand. I asked him his favorite movie but he didn't know. mine is beautiful boy. he said he saw little women but I wanna read it first. also we talked about friends and how I grew up with it and it would be on the same time as hannah montana at 7:30. he said he watched a lot of hannah but not actually bc of his sisters since they were a bit older than the target audience so I guess he just watched it bc he wanted to? also I said drake and josh was the only children’s sitcom my dad would watch bc it was funny to him too. it reminds me of when we were at mango mango and he pointed out the mangoes and said they reminded him of the pear ipads from icarly and victorious.

we stopped at Panera and he didn’t get the sandwich I recommended. he got a plain turkey sandwich instead, but mine was literally the same except it had really good bread. when we were waiting for maxwell to figure out the drink machine, a jeremy song came on and I said I went to his concert in philly and got the sweatshirt I was wearing from there. he said it was a sign. during lunch annie brought up coronavirus and how a girl got back from abroad and went to mixers. and they talked about traveling in europe. keith said he had family he visited in some European country that I don't remember at this point, and that his most recent immigrant was one of his grandfathers. I wonder what his parents look like. on our way out I asked if we could go to petco and he said for a few minutes. and we got to see lizards and snakes and geckos and gerbils and birds. and then on our way out I said ‘omg a turtle’ really loudly and he turned around and smiled. later I asked him if he had any pets and he said he used to have a dog. he asked me and I said I didn't. he said it seemed like I really want one though. his sister is a vet and the other works for a pet store company.

we talked about college and how well our semesters have gone. he said his freshman year was rough and he didn't feel like himself and was lazy sophomore year and didn't have good friends until sophomore spring I think. and that cornell was good for him bc he’d grown up in such a small school his entire life and he needed the change. I feel like I would’ve felt a greater sense of belonging if I went to a liberal arts school just bc of its size. he liked 4th and 8th and this year. I liked 3rd 6th 9th and freshman year and this year. he was surprised that I liked them for meeting new people, but I think it has to do with the fact that I met a lot of people in those years who I grew to really care about. even though trying to meet people in that time was hard. and freshman year was just really transformative for my growth. ‘wait tell me more about umd.’ I kept it vague and told him how I was a nerd and was really scared about grades and went to office hours and studied a lot. we stopped at a gas station then so the topic kind of died down. he left the door open for a few minutes after getting out then popped his head back, ‘sorry about that’, and we were all confused but it was just him apologizing for the cold getting in. there was a convenience store inside and his favorite candy is sweet tarts. I liked kit kats a lot, and he does too but he eats them too quickly. I pointed out the cookies and crème, which he’s never had before, but I mentioned that I gave him the option last Halloween when I had candy from work.

he asked me to put on music but I was scared I would get judged for my music taste and we didn’t have an aux cord and he said we should get one at a rest stop but we never ended up doing that. we turned on the radio and it felt like such an early 2010s thing to do, and I mentioned in middle school there were only two radio stations people listened to. ‘wait name them.’ and he fucking knew 106.5 and 104.3 and gosh. when he said ‘wait we have so much in common’ with that damn smile. I know he was just talking about common experiences we’ve had just living somewhat close to each other, but what initially drew me to him was that we have the same major and both came from md. I always felt a stronger connection to him and I feel like he appreciated our similarities too. it was so fun bc I associate all those md things with people from high school but to have this in common with a friend from college is just so surreal. it’s like two worlds colliding in a wonderful way.

there were moments when I felt like it was just us, away from segc and just traveling together. when he asked me to look at the Airbnb info. when he asked me to find parking for him bc he’s never parallel parked. but that one time when everyone was in the car and he did it perfectly and everyone cheered. memorizing where our car was. his smile when I would anticipate what he needed and tell him I already have a parking lot set in maps as our destination. when he gave me his wallet to pay the toll. when I left that note in the car bc we were blocking other people. when the windows fogged up and I had to check if he could merge. and when we had to both roll down the window bc the ac was broken. when I checked to make sure he parked between the lines. when everyone else was rushing off to dinner and we stayed behind to make sure we didn't have to pay for parking. and then the next day figuring out the machine. and figuring out the rates. and paying for our parking in the lobby. when he couldn’t get the card in and asked me to try. and in the morning too. when we woke up before everyone else. and I was still in bed working and he was surprised to see me awake and dabbed bc we were talking about that in the car. and just ‘can I use your room’ ‘can I take a shower’ ‘I’m gonna brush my teeth’ ‘wait can I pee first’. cleaning up the Airbnb and stripping the sheets and throwing everything out and taking out the trash and setting the coffee table back and arranging the couch pillows. ‘can I put this here for a second’ when he left his jacket in my room just when he was in the bathroom. but the second night he kept it there for hours. I loved it when we were just talking on our own too. like on the road when he pointed out the baseball and basketball hall of fame and the chesapeake watershed. when he tricked me by calling a random stream the susquehanna, then ‘it’s the susquehanna’ ‘really?’ ‘oh idk’ when I got him back, and then joking that the river we were crossing by harvard was it too, but we actually saw it on the way back. and in the kitchen when he dropped the clif bar wrapper and I said his name in a disappointing way so when we were cleaning up he joked and said we gotta make sure there were no more wrappers lying around. ‘I’m going to go into that room for a while.’ I gave him a weird look so he explained he was gonna do push-ups and didn't want to fall behind and put his finger on his lips. and when I told him I was meeting a friend sunday morning with just us in the kitchen, he said he was jealous. I think bc he wanted to see his best friend from brown. this shit seems miniscule and dumb but. idk it just made me feel happy and light and dumb inside.

edit 3/21: I’m finally back to finish this post, hopefully. it’s definitely been a weird past week, and so much has changed since the boston trip that I’ve been reluctant to come back and finish this bc of how different I feel compared to how “happy and light and dumb inside” I was a mere two weeks ago. life is definitely weird now. and I didn’t want to taint this post with that. but I think inevitably I am less excited and happy about this trip and probably forgot some the small things. but I needed to finish this eventually, so here I am.

on our way there, I asked him if he was close to his high school friends. and he said he saw a bunch of people last summer. and his friend like inspired him a bit bc he acts with no shame in that he won’t let small doubts hold him back. and that made him want to reach out to hs people. and I said I wanted to talk to some people from home but it was hard bc I didn’t know if they’d want to talk to me too, but then ‘would you be happy if they reached out to you?’ ‘it’s not the same.’ I asked him about his segc application and the issue he talked about. he talked about racism and his perspective. the radio said south by southwest was cancelled, our speaker that week was on the board for the event. the radio also talked about virus cases in boston on our way there. also on our way into the city the second day, there was a sign that said something like ‘caution’ ‘coronavirus cases’ or something and he said it felt like we were in the beginning of an apocalyptic movie.

when we got to the Airbnb, the others spent literally two hours trying to find a dinner place for us. but we were just chilling. he complimented my shoes. and said butterflies when I was doing stretches on the ground. we went to get water from the kitchen and he got some from the tap but I found a water filter in one of the cabinets and pointed it out to him. ‘oh it tastes fine though’ but I needed it for me. ‘oh that was selfish of me.’ and then ‘lucy what’s your fourth favorite day at cornell’ but we were back in the living room. and he corrected himself to ‘well everyone’ but it was directed at me. and he was asking me. and it made me feel special. in the car he asked me my fourth favorite year and I think that’s how we started talking about umd, and fourth favorite ice cream. his number one is chocolate. at dinner, we were at the thai place and he got chicken curry but ‘why don’t you try something new.’ he said it was too risky given how spicy the menu was and how hungry he was at the moment. he mentioned the md state fair bc annie talked about the ny state fair. and seriously. I fucking need to know if the timonium state fair grounds are legit state fair grounds. like is the fair actually a state fair or do they just call themselves that. omfg I’ve been wondering this for years and I need answers. on our way to dinner, my shoe came untied and I said I could catch up but he waited for me anyway. and as we were jogging he was like ‘remember disney’ bc I told him I fell. we saw a bunch of bunnies in the yards of the houses and I said watership down kinda traumatized me. he said his sister had to read or watch (?) it but he didn’t but he knew it was gruesome. after dinner though we all walked to the tower. that we saw in the distance while we were driving and walking to the restaurant. but it just ended being an academic building with a weird tower top. and it started snowing and was extremely cold. and maxwell told this story about how his brakes got cut on his bike.

after dinner we got back and they were figuring out a movie to watch on netflix. and couldn’t decide so I suggested the office s5 ep14 bc stress relief is iconic. and it made me happy that everyone was enjoying the episode. divya was like ‘keith and lucy look like you’re having fun’ bc we were both sitting on the ground I guess in her like camera’s direction? idk. I thought it was weird she pointed out us two specifically. bc before she asked him how the car ride went and he said everyone was doing work. and she was like wait what so what did you do. ‘I talked to lucy a lot actually.’ ‘oh what’d you guys talk about.’ but he had to fix the car parking and then she asked me from across the room in front of everyone what we talked about. also at dinner saturday she sat down and then literally changed seats to sit next to him. and also ‘shivani, we should visit dc over spring break.’ right after he said he was gonna do a 10k there. it’s a little sus is all. they played some card games after the episodes but I took a shower instead. I think keith and mahdia were partners. after they played I was standing in the living room and everyone was figuring out the sleeping situation and he tapped me on my shoulder. but he kinda messed up bc he tried to trick me but he tapped the wrong one bc he overthought it.

lucy take your pick, are we there yet, ice cream cake, diners, tufts, 75 state st section 3k, green tea latte, lucy is so funny, magnet, pics in the comic store, questions to ask, salt water taffy, waiting for us by the elevator, crocs store, circle push door???, vineyard vines, bookstore, racing up the stairs, printable stories, ideal Friday night, lucy just takes shotgun, parking for harvard, stopping in pokeworks, looking back at me, the moon and the sun, you know what you need to do, can you get us home, keith st, what’s new, tell me how this morning went, how’d it go, i’m glad you got to go, band and art and classes and sports, my brother, never being at whole foods before, are there tongs, md grocery stores, my phone is messed up, fucking up on the highway, clif bar flavors, first crush, dating, umd, dances and prom, parties, selfie, canoe trip, ipods and mp3 and ds and psp, being dropped off last, his dorky ok, great Gatsby soundtrack, it doesn't really come up in conversation

#remarks #this time I left some notes to myself #so I don't forget

0 notes

angelenoabroad · 7 years

Text

A letter to my high school self...

(My femininity, sexuality, and cultural identity has been a little more sensitive lately from outside triggers. The past two weeks I’ve battled internal conflicts of what it means to be a woman, an ally, and a person of color. This all relates to my experiences living abroad and processing any kind of resolution. I realized that a path to moving forward is acknowledging who I used to be, and the person that is evolving now.)

***

Dear 17 year old Stef,

You wrote your college Personal Essay based on your experience living with 16 other people under one roof--aside from your immediate family, you shared a home with grandparents, aunts, uncles, and cousins from the motherland. It wasn’t until these last few hours I’ve realized why you likely didn’t get into the schools you wanted to based on said essay.

I, your 31 year old self, along with your mentors and teachers, would all probably agree that it was an engaging topic. Not everyone can relate to that kind of living situation and it was a unique experience with your family. However, your perspective didn’t showcase what you’ve learned from this experience and how it has influenced you for the better.

You were under the impression that you were entitled to some kind of privilege that you did not have. Not entirely. Not then, anyway. I’m not sure when you became aware of the term “Model Minority” but at some point in high school, you thought this applied to you, especially around the time of college admissions. In some cases, it did. You lived in an affluent neighborhood in a sizable house (granted, it was to accommodate the 17 people under it). Your parents’ dual income made you ineligible for certain financial aid. You attended “California Distinguished” schools. You were eligible for the GATE program in elementary school. You participated in extracurricular activities: Modern Jazz, Filipino folk dancing, Taekwondo, Field Hockey, and Video Production. You had a diverse group of friends. All of these facets definitely contributed to your successes.

However, in other ways this “Model Minority” stereotype didn’t exactly fit you either. You are of South East Asian / Pacific Islander descent. You were born in a developing neighborhood that wasn’t immune from local crime. Your grandparents, relatives, and neighbors looked after you and your brother while your parents worked full time jobs with overtime, picking up very early and very late hours. You were brought up in a Filipino-Hispanic Catholic Church. Let’s be honest, your SAT scores were shit. You didn’t do well in math, science, and US history. You didn’t read a lot (outside of required reading, which is weird because you love to write). You had test anxieties, trouble focusing, and being self-disciplined. You snuck out of the house. You were boy crazy. You shared your body with others who didn’t deserve it. You risked unwanted pregnancy. Your family’s cultural values did not match those of many of your classmates. You were highly depressed, and had suicidal thoughts. Who knows what other mental illnesses you would’ve been diagnosed with if you had looked into it, but that’s no ones fault.

Undoubtedly you have privileges and disadvantages. You’re a smart girl, you were aware of both. I’m proud of the opportunities you’ve seized and the ones you’ve created for yourself. If privilege was a contributing factor to our success, then I’m grateful. But Stef, it’s the minority that you belong to that you’ve suppressed and hidden. I’m glad you’ve adapted and risen to be who you are now. It got us a great job in New Zealand and avenues to explore other cities. You’ve hidden the person you are at heart as well as her voice. You’d be happy to know that person has come out more since high school.

I’m going to share something with you that you don’t realize: you’re trying to be white. I know. You think I’m wrong. Even 23-30 year old Stef thinks I’m wrong. I don’t blame you. You noticed others around you advancing in ways you thought would be accessible to you as well. Yeah, you kind of dicked around and let responsibilities slip through the cracks. Yet there’s also no denying that you weren’t treated as fairly because of things beyond your control. You’re also aware of others with even lesser opportunities than you, and I appreciate that.

I know that we can’t undo the past. Even if we could, I may not be writing this to you or be where I’m at now. It could be better, it could be worse. I wish I could go back and tell you: - Don’t be ashamed to check box “Filipino/a” on ethnic censuses (as opposed to “Asian, other than Pacific Islander”) - It’s great that you did activities, like going to the park and pool, with your younger cousins. Also, let them discover American things on their own terms. - You’ve made mistakes. It’s okay. Don’t let them deter you from your passions. - Try not to get caught up in comparing yourself to others. You progress at your own pace, and it doesn’t make you any less gifted or capable. In fact, you’ll come to find later that you’re quite weird, which you love about yourself and others love too! - Yeah, I know... Emo, New Wave, and indie rock seem cool. They are fun. So is country and heavy metal. Girl, R&B and Hip Hop are cool too. Don’t be shy to blast your Blaque, Luniz, and Aaliyah CDs (ProTip: 90s and early 2000′s R&B makes a HUGE comeback. It’s kind of obnoxious, really). And guess what, later you DJ the type of music you grew up on! Pretty neat, right? Also, your love for The Carpenters and the like never dies. You still slay at Karaoke, too (hint: Bjork). - Boys are scum. Some men you meet later are worse. They come inside you without permission. They make crude comments about how you look. They force themselves on you. They make assumptions about you and your sexuality. Some women aren’t too great either. I don’t know how to protect you from them. I’m sorry. I’m so so sorry. Hang in there. You do meet some very good ones. You really challenge them, though. They’ll come through for you. More importantly, you’ll come through for yourself. - Cut your parents some slack. Know they’re cutting you some slack, too. You love them. It doesn’t feel like it, especially at 17, but they love the shit out of you. - Speaking of parents, there comes a point in your adulthood where you just start to figure things out. This is later coined as, “adulting.” Note: it’s nowhere near the same as your parents’ version. So don’t get caught in with their expectations on you as an adult either. I think they end up coming around anyway. It almost doesn’t matter what Mom and Dad did or didn’t tell you. Ironically, you’re not keen on learning but you’re pretty damn good at it when you want to. (Also, “keen” is a word you pick up in NZ). - Your family was relentless in spending time together, despite how crazy they drove you and vice versa. I know... Cherish it. - Friends will come and go. Some are gone forever, indefinitely, or come back. Value all of your friendships. And don’t be friends with just “westernized” ones. - Pay attention to politics. You don’t always have to participate, but be aware of what’s going on around you. You’ll see that it affects the people and communities you care about deeply. - It’s okay to value yourself. Care for yourself. Love yourself. (It’s not always easy, but you do).

I’m proud to say that you’ve consistently been a real individual. You have a uniqueness about you and please try to accept that. Looking back on your Personal Essay, I know how living with 16 members of your family influenced you. You develop a deep care for your personal identity and those similar to you. You appreciate trips back to the Philippines more, and find ways to connect a little more with the family who live there. You empathize / sympathize with various minority groups in their struggles for equality and visibility in the world. You love your family more and slowly find ways to re-connect with them. Ultimately, you’ve helped me stay true to us and appreciate our Southern Californian, Filipina-American roots. I hold onto the things we love dearly. It helps me translate our perspective into other countries and how we relate to the local citizens, immigrants, and (especially) indigenous groups. Stef, we’re totally doing okay. We may not have gotten into a top university, but we fucking kill it at the school of life.

1 note · View note

cryptodictation · 4 years

Text

Rubem Fonseca renewed the short story and the novel by showing Brazilian reality

(photo: Zeca Fonseca / Divulgao)

“Every word has to be used”, he liked to say Rubem Fonseca when asked about the words and obscenities present in his more than 30 books. There, in the most police literature that Brazil had in the second half of the 20th century, everything was allowed. In life outside of books, however, Fonseca was a mystery. He gave very few interviews and hardly came. It was Zuenir Ventura who explained, in a loving text published in 2015, that the writer friend was not exactly a recluse – he did like to go to the cinema, meet friends and even travel – but Fonseca, killed yesterday afternoon, aged 94, in Rio de Janeiro, he was terrified of becoming a celebrity, of becoming more important than his own work. Until the closing of this issue, the family did not comment on the burial, which must be discreet because of the coronavirus pandemic.

The writer was admitted to the Samaritano Hospital, in Botafogo, in the capital of Rio de Janeiro. He suffered a heart attack at home and died in the hospital after a cardiac arrest. It would be 95 next May 11th. He wrote daily, as he told in literature events abroad, the only ones for whom he accepted invitations, since in Brazil, he refused to talk about the work. It is tempting to imagine what could come out of your head after the madness of the coronavirus pandemic that paralyzed the planet. Dark stories, with a lot of sex and violence, certainly, but with the art of handling the word that he well knew where to put to talk about a violent, unequal and sad Brazil.

“Z Rubem did not discriminate words for moral value, he worked with words for an aesthetic and ethical choice”, explains Ventura. “He had that dual personality of being a recluse, not giving interviews as a public figure and personally being a fun person. Sometimes I questioned Z about his way and he always answered: ‘I don’t know why I am like this’. ”

Rubem Fonseca was born in Juiz de Fora (MG), but grew up in Rio de Janeiro. It has a strange path when you take into account the books you have written. Graduated in law, he began his career as a police commissioner in So Cristvo, in Rio de Janeiro. At the Escola de Polcia, he was known for his understanding of psychology, the same that he applied to characters like Commissioner Alberto Mattos, from August, and to detective Ivan Canabrava, from Bufo & Spallanzani, to name two of his best known books.

Debut

With The prisoners, published in 1963, the author debuted on the literary scene, without any prior notice, since his career was more about the real police world than that of books. This meeting of 12 stories brought a collection of resilient and visceral characters, the same ones that would populate the author's world. Beggars, bandits, professional killers, murdered prostitutes, doubtful detectives, perverse investigators, the raw and brutal material, as well as the miner's own writing, was there, although it was with Happy New Year, from 1975, which he noted.

The book was banned during the dictatorship because it was considered “contrary to morals and good customs”. “We were censored and banned together in 1976”, recalls Igncio de Loyola Brando, who had the novel Zero vetoed on the same occasion. “From the censorship of our books – Happy New Year, Zero It's from Araceli my love, by Jos Louzeiro – the first major manifesto against censorship took place in 1977, signed by several intellectuals. ” The manifesto was organized by Lygia Fagundes Telles, Hlio Silva, Nlida Pion and Jefferson Ribeiro de Andrade and addressed to then President Ernesto Geisel

With the stories, Fonseca won his place, alongside Dalton Trevisan, as reinventor of Brazilian literature. “He was an important short story writer, somehow he renewed the brief narrative”, points out Milton Hatoum, author of Dois irmos. “The stories impressed me not only because of the form, but also because of the violence he was dealing with, urban violence. It had a lot to do with the climate of the dictatorship. I think there is this marriage in a brief way with a prosaic language and without elaboration, all linked to the theme of violence in a country that has always been violent, not only during the dictatorship ”, says Hatoum.

The short and far-fetched form of Fonseca's writing jumped from the short stories to the novels and in this style is a good part of the author's writing magic. The Morel case was the first, followed by The Great Art, starring lawyer Mandrake, a character who plunges into the underworld to investigate a murder.

Generations

Being a writer with more than five decades of career has many consequences, but perhaps the biggest one is the fact that it has influenced several generations of readers and authors. Virtually all of them, since the 1960s. “It was extremely important for a generation of writers who started to write influenced by his works”, says Michel Laub. “They are works that do not age,” he guarantees.

Tit Tony Bellotto, author of detective novels, as Bellini and the Sphinx, also has Fonseca as a reference. “He inaugurates urban literature in Brazil and leaves a monumental legacy. Happy new year was like a revelation; it was different from everything I read at school, ”he says.

About 10 years younger than Fonseca, Igncio de Loyola Brando has good stories of this friendship. They traveled together a few times to attend literary events. In Israel, during one of these meetings, Fonseca was charged with speaking for the group and planting a tree. “Nobody knows, but I was always a dendrlatra”, he would have said, in the speech of the ceremony. No one knew the meaning of the word, used to describe lovers of trees and nature. “Rubem showed that you could write police literature in this country,” says Loyola. “His characters are people we know, who we see on the street, in the offices, they are our friends. I had known for some time that he was not well. L if he was a friend of more than 50 years, ”he concluded.

* Vinicius Veloso collaborated, an intern under the supervision of Igor Silveira

The post Rubem Fonseca renewed the short story and the novel by showing Brazilian reality appeared first on Cryptodictation.

from WordPress https://cryptodictation.com/2020/04/16/rubem-fonseca-renewed-the-short-story-and-the-novel-by-showing-brazilian-reality-2/

#Entertainment

0 notes

cryptodictation · 4 years

Text

Rubem Fonseca renewed the short story and the novel by showing Brazilian reality

(photo: Zeca Fonseca / Divulgao)

Debut

Generations

* Vinicius Veloso collaborated, an intern under the supervision of Igor Silveira

The post Rubem Fonseca renewed the short story and the novel by showing Brazilian reality appeared first on Cryptodictation.

from WordPress https://cryptodictation.com/2020/04/16/rubem-fonseca-renewed-the-short-story-and-the-novel-by-showing-brazilian-reality/

#Entertainment

0 notes