#(like sorry we can't all be neurotypical in here. you cannot fathom how crowded the Yamanote Line gets unless you've seen it)

[afniel]

God damn I'm tired and extra dizzy today, which I've figured out some of why that happens. Evidently that's my reaction to overstimulation fatigue. Good to know, explains a lot. No idea what to do about it and I did expect to have some sucky days after going to San Francisco anyway so it's whatever, but it's nice to have figured out a specific trigger.

Except that's cool and all but I almost couldn't fold laundry today because it involved a lot of looking up and down and that was unnecessarily rough. This was after sleeping like 11 hours because my shit-ass tired-ass brain demanded a hard reboot more or less, and I'm still kind of gross today even so. Kind of glad they rescheduled the root canal I was gonna have Tuesday for like two weeks out, because I am probably not gonna be quite recovered for another week at least and dental work fucks me up also so that would have been an Everything Hurty Syndrome 2x Combo.

Bleh. At least when I'm writing chronic illness/disability it's some own voices legit type ass shit, but does it have to be, because I could do without this. My whole me hurts and nothing seems to help and also turning my head too fast will knock me the hell over. Good times. ✌️😔

#chronic illness #fibro #chronic pain #chronic fatigue #disability #like I looked up at the TV where my partner is playing FFVII Rebirth and down at my phone just now #and that was not a good plan. I got very dizzy just doing that. #The Suffering is like extra spicy recipe today because I just Don't Do Crowds and never have really #went flat catatonic once in Tokyo during rush hour on a train. that was cool. (it wasn't) #(ex had to drag my unresponsive ass to a corner and wait for me to eventually reconnect to reality) #(it took a while. he was Very Mad at me which was not a kind way to handle it.) #(like sorry we can't all be neurotypical in here. you cannot fathom how crowded the Yamanote Line gets unless you've seen it) #I did get sat on and purred at by every cat last night tho bc they could tell I was Very Not Normal so that was nice at least #I've had this as a symptom forever but I never thought about it that much until I started writing about it #I think I'm a lot more aware of it now. which honestly is probably safer for me bc who wants to fall over? #not me. done it a few times. not fun. can't recommend it.