#'well. not what i secretly hoped for but we're still alive. and we have money now. only mildly disappointed. mostly relieved.'

[rpmemesbyarat]

RP meme from Scream Queens Ep 10 "Thanksgiving"

Listen. I don't want you to take this the wrong way, but I don't think I can bone you right now.

My wanger is way stressed out.

I've killed for our love.

I just gave her a little push.

You and I can pick up right where we left off.

You can bring me home for Thanksgiving and introduce me to my future in-laws.

What did you do with the body?

I put it in the meat locker. It's where we've been putting all the dead bodies.

I need to see the body.

Look, we can have a three-way with the body.

I'll show you the body, but not so you can have sex with it.

I'll show it to you so that you and I will share a dangerous secret that will strengthen our relationship and bring us closer together.

I don't understand how this keeps happening!

Is this meat locker, like, a wormhole to an alternate universe or something?

She'll probably stop at nothing until she gets her revenge by murdering you.

No one wants to spend a room service Thanksgiving alone.

Are you going to talk at all?

You shouldn't be mad at me.

We're the sane ones.

Now, I know you've got other plans today, and for alibi's sake we need to protect your cover, but I am not letting you leave on an empty stomach.

Is that what quail is? I thought they were bigger.

You know what I was picturing? Pheasant.

Time to slice off those breasts.

I feel like this holiday is all about family, and, well, as you know, I gave up on my real family a long time ago.

I mean, at this point, the closest thing I have to family is. . . you.

I understand that Thanksgiving is supposed to be about family and being together and thanking God that we were born rich in America and not in Uganda or Venezuela or any of those other African countries.

You're late. The game's just about to start.

What do you think would happen if those instructions were incorrect?

This family's fortune is built on being right on time.

There's nothing better than sitting together as a family, watching the game. Laughing, smiling, just enjoying the warmth of each other's company. That's what it's all about today. Togetherness.

I hate defrosted food.

Why is it called Italian Style Chicken Cacciatore? All chicken cacciatore is Italian style.

This is not what Thanksgiving is supposed to be.

A bunch of my sort-of friends have been killed and no one has asked me about it.

Oh. And I'm starting a new family tradition. It involves me never coming to any family occasions ever again.

Would you stop with the screaming?

It's more like a stay of execution until no one is looking.

I've never cooked before, but that should be fine, since I usually just pretend to eat.

Well, I can cook and eat for the both of us.

So we've decided to have an orphans Thanksgiving all together.

I mean, I guess you could come over here if you wanted.

And this year I'm so thankful for the lax indecency laws in Eastern Europe that inundate our Internet with millions of hours of hard-core porn.

You know, ever since I was a little boy, I knew what God wanted me to do and that was make money off the backs of creative people.

I am so thankful that he, for whatever reason, has not murdered me yet.

You have such a vast future ahead of you.

You'll meet so many new and different women. So many wonderful women to go out with and break up with and move on from.

You should be thankful that this table is too long for me to reach across and strangle you, bitch!

What are you doing here? How are you alive?

When I woke up and regained consciousness, I felt better than ever.

The only thing you're carrying is water weight, you bloated little tramp.

I have a little game to play that's gonna make the time fly right by.

No, I've never killed anyone as far as I know.

Okay, there is no evidence at all that mass murder is genetic.

I would say that is more than a little suspicious.

I have bathroom shame issues. I always wait until everyone is asleep and then I sneak down to poop in the little powder room downstairs.

I mean, don't we all agree that those babies are the killers?

That seems like an unnecessarily complicated cover story.

I think we have plenty here to go to the police.

What, are you drunk?

You know, the one time I call you for a little advice, you're hammered.

I suppose we should discuss the matter of payment.

I'm asking you to name your price.

Are you propositioning me?

No, I'm asking how much money it'll take to make you go away.

My family is super-gross rich.

That outfit screams desperation.

I am, however, willing to write you a check for $50,000 if you will leave now and never come back.

It's a lot of money for a family like yours.

What is the best part about Thanksgiving?

Tastes like Henry VIII just barfed in my mouth.

Well, I don't want to sound like a dick here, but have you ever considered maybe you should leave?

I brought some of my famous eight-meat stuffing. It's beef, venison, alligator, buffalo, rabbit, goat, rattlesnake and Spam. I cut all of the meats super thin, so that you're guaranteed every meat in every bite.

I thought you said you were leaving forever or something like that?

Have you ever even cracked open a book?

You did say just the other day that the only way to live is to play the long game.

I really hope you can come up with something better than that.

I can prove that you're the only person in this room we know for a fact is a murderer.

I saw you in the coffee shop the other day, reading one of your old Playgirl magazines.

Okay, look, there's just some stuff that doesn't add up.

Look, I've gone through all the suspects in my mind, and I can explain away all my suspicions for everyone except you.

Can we just talk this out, so you can help me see that I'm wrong?

I mean, it would fit in with your whole hard worker, let's find out the truth, never take no for an answer, awful personality.

Anything to redeem your beloved dead mother.

I can't rest when the killer's still out there, so I stayed behind to do some more research.

You're skinny and pretty, so that's a plus, but it's highly competitive, so you'd better be rich, too.

You know how at the beginning of the year, I was always secretly following you so I could just keep an eye on you, make sure you were safe?

I heard you talking to someone, but I couldn't hear what it was about.

Thank you for letting me talk about this, talk this out, and hear your side of the story.

Um, homely, ugly.

Gold digger! Not welcome.

No, no, too chunky to wear that outfit.

I'm fairly certain this board game's been tampered with.

And while my motivations were airtight and my conscience clear, still, I'm sorry.

I mean, no one deserves to be spoken to like that, particularly not by what is, without a doubt, the most awful family in America.

I've honestly seen more tasteful decor at a Sizzler.

And you, sir, give the kind, hard-working, deeply moral people who work in such a wonderful industry as Hollywood a bad name.

I am walking out that door and never speaking to you again.

How could such a stud evolve from a boy who was so clearly a douche?

Oh, please, look, I-I was so bombed at that party. I mean, I remember I puked while I was making out with some girl, but there is no way that I could've found my way back down there 20 minutes later, let alone 20 years.

This is really embarrassing, um, but I started the paleo diet, because I'm back on the dating scene now, and I-I wanted to lose some weight.

I never saw a body down there.

I-I was a bit of a man slut back in the day, and it was the '90s, so nobody wore condoms.

I'm obligated to take it to the police.

What are you gonna do with the money?

didn't take the money, idiot.

Okay, first of all, I experienced extreme emotional trauma this evening, and second, I'm the one delegating tasks, thank you very much.

I couldn't find any matches.

I was sharpening this knife.

You haven't eaten yet, have you? I knew it!

You've come back. You've chosen me over your awful family.

First of all, my family is awesome. How dare you?

So, without further ado, dinner is served.

#rp meme #rp memes #rp starters #roleplay meme #roleplay starters #roleplay memes #scream queens

[punkscowardschampions]

Ali & Tommy

Ali: Now on the coach Ali: How's Ro been? Ali: Tried to give her as much space as poss Tommy: I'll give it a minute before I let ma know, yeah? Give you some space too like Tommy: Proper shut down. Standard Tommy: She ain't said a word to none of us Ali: Cheers Ali: Been a fucking event, don't think even Ma can top the drama but not dying to find out Ali: I thought as much 😟 Ali: I don't think there's much to be done but be there when she's ready though, right? Ali: idk, plenty of friends cried on these shoulders but never Ro over this, its new ground Tommy: You're alright Tommy: I reckoned as much when she flew home Tommy: Like I've been in with tea but I'm blatantly juggling cups and nothing else Tommy: She ain't about my efforts Tommy: Offered to dance battle him and she didn't even laugh Ali: Tah for being tea boy though, more necessary and appreciated than it might seem when she's catatonic Ali: to be fair, that isn't funny, babe 😜 Tommy: Giving it a go Tommy: x 2 like Tommy: oi I'm well funny Ali: 💚 Ali: hmm Ali: i hope that's not your aim w this theatre school lark Ali: standup you ain't Tommy: Laugh it up or you ain't getting your welcome home cupcakes honey Tommy: 🌟 baker I am Ali: tears of a clown baby bro Ali: 'cos bet mary berry herself didn't whip up anything for your arrival only days previous Ali: that's da Ali: mum is OBVS paul Ali: the accent, the blue steel, the unnecessary harsh judgment Tommy: 😂 Tommy: The cupboards were bare before yours truly showed up to help with the big shop Tommy: Working my ballet body without rest here Ali: wanna have a fab summer not a flab one darling Ali: only thinking of all the money they ain't had to put into your training #datscholarshiptho Tommy: Put your claws away if you ain't aiming them at a diff blonde lad Tommy: That'll be why I'm shameless fave not cause none of yous are about Ali: seriously don't Ali: he better square up when we're in that car park Ali: if the teachers don't get him first...you won't believe the fucking scandal blatantly occurring rn Ali: obvs 😘 'til Bea and Fraze become the big ballers they wanna be and start paying it back Ali: all 'bout that dolla Tommy: if you heard that lad, gotta post up 🥊 Tommy: someone better smack that cunt Tommy: Spill it sister, how is he on worse behavior? Nearly a proper skill at this point Ali: I plan to Ali: just followed Carly into the fucking cupboard bog, like Ali: in what world are you not getting caught Ali: we're in a fucking tin can Tommy: ERRR Tommy: Your Carly? Tommy: she can do better Ali: I been telling her Ali: best believe Ali: can't drag her out like time out bitch Ali: he's a disease s2g Ali: every fucking girl I know Tommy: 💔 not about that for her Tommy: Every girl except you? 🤔 suspect Ali: nah Ali: don't need to tell you he treats her like shit, duh Ali: ☕ Tommy: let me at her inbox tbh Tommy: not having this Tommy: she's a cutie Ali: do it Ali: meddlin' gay who smugly knows best defs a better stereotype than jealous ex Ali: 😣 no tah Tommy: Valid Tommy: Your eyes ain't gone green though, have they? Tommy: If this is a triangle, or love square tell me now bitch Ali: Bitch Ali: how dare you do me down like that Ali: Nah, I just want her to be happy Ali: and ain't happening with that cunt Tommy: Don't you reckon she knows that Tommy: She was happy with you but that went how it went maybe she's not looking for it to be like that again Ali: Oh, so I just let her fuck her life up Ali: polite smiles from the sideline like SOOOOO happy for you babes, what a man! Ali: Pfffft 😒 Ali: be a better gay Tommy: Nah but putting yourself out there for the real shit is such a THING Tommy: I get it Ali: So dramatic the lot of you Ali: not gotta get a pug and a mortgage Ali: if you ain't going out there tryna be happy every day every way Ali: what's the point Ali: a madness Tommy: Maybe she's all out of trying after putting up with your high maintenance arse for so long ☕ Tommy: 😂 Tommy: Nobody's bringing their best for that basic fuckboy Ali: 🖕 piss off hair product Tommy: Like you take any less time putting together your 'effortless' lewks you faux hippie Tommy: Don't be coming for my crowning glory Ali: Bleurgh Ali: forgot how much of a bitch you were Ali: when you going back again? 😘 Tommy: We've all seen you #bringitforberlin Tommy: Not that I'm jealous nah Tommy: But how was it? Drama aside Ali: 👼 Don't push me down the stairs, watching my back now like 👀 Ali: It overshadowed everything lowkey but yeah Ali: still ace Tommy: You'll bring it back around when you flatten Drew Ali: 🍑👏 him Tommy: 👑 Tommy: what are we gonna do about Ro and Carly though? 🤔 Must focus Ali: soz, my booty has that affect Ali: but seriously Ali: I am fresh out of ideas... Ali: maybe he's like Samson and we need to give him a buzzcut Ali: break the spell Tommy: or shove a bowl on his head and ✂ Ali: ain't far off Ali: ☕ it ain't that cute a cut Ali: its just shiny and blonde, snap out of it ladies! Tommy: Honestly Tommy: Meena got all the looks and that's the tea Ali: Oooooooooh! 😉 Ali: No argument tho even if you're 😍 Tommy: SHUT YOUR MOUTH WHEN YOU TALK TO ME ALISON Tommy: She's just better than him very HIGHKEY Tommy: Take it up with our man JC Ali: 😂 Ali: Bless Ali: so sweet Ali: and finally Ali: a matrimony we can all get behind Tommy: excuse me he made me and her both queens Tommy: too fabulous for your hetero baiting of the audience Ali: sure jan Ali: can't fake that chemistry Ali: told you, you're a shit actor Tommy: Take a step back Marsha if you don't want me coming for your weave Tommy: You reckoned on your ex a few back? Marlene would blatantly kill Drew no questions Ali: 💅💄 jealousy's a disease, get well soon bitch 😷 Ali: now you gay baiting! Tommy: 😂 Ali: Let karma sort him out Ali: Ro's well out of it Ali: Carly, I hope, knows what she's doing, even if I don't fuck with it Ali: he ain't gonna 💔 Tommy: Yeah Tommy: Still, drink and debrief when you get home? Tommy: I wanna hear how the teachers throw down Ali: fosho Ali: dog or you SO 100% G.A.Y. now you refuse to go anywhere that ain't flying at least 2 rainbow flags at all times? 😉 Tommy: 🌈 or bust Tommy: not gonna be Ro's scene but if you wanna bring Carly that cunt isn't gonna set foot in such hallowed ground Ali: A different concept for scared straight but I'm with it Ali: I'll ask her Ali: got a party dress I didn't get to debut, gotta save something for the home crowd, like Tommy: I'd watch THAT show Ali: wouldn't we all Ali: so much teen mum to catch up on, you best not have watched it without me! Tommy: Not trying to get struck down ta Tommy: That fury's all for Drew Ali: unless you've deleted all the recording like ur burning after reading, you're alright kid Tommy: Honey I know what's holy Ali: thank God someone does Ali: Drew getting kicked straight to hell and off this bus if he don't chill Tommy: They still going? Tommy: Ugh Ali: Nah Ali: Laoise and her crew dobbed, which fair enough literally no one needs it, doubt they got started before the teachs' were yanking them out Ali: if they had handcuffs Drew would be chained to his seat rn no lie Ali: citizen's arrests and full-scale riot behaviour going down rn from everyone slating Carly Tommy: omhg Tommy: I hope someone's streaming Tommy: Gonna send my girl 💚🍀 Ali: no doubt Ali: reckon we might have to make an emergency stop Ali: couldn't even make the trip home Ali: really lads REALLY Tommy: And I thought my school was full of drama queens and kings Tommy: Christ alive Ali: honestly Ali: got nothing on the common people Ali: i'm so over it Ali: gonna knock myself over the head in a minute so i don't have to deal Tommy: I'd suggest a sing song but don't reckon that'll cut it Tommy: Call me a bad gay again but Tommy: Never hear you over the war cries like Ali: 😂 if there was ever a moment for kumbaya Tommy: If they'd let you keep your 🎸 you'd be thriving Tommy: Yeah I heard about that casual confiscation Tommy: Weapon in more ways than one though, lads Ali: THANK YOU Ali: how we gon' play for peace now Ali: gonna have to get real happy clappy Tommy: 👏stop👏 slutshaming👏 carly👏 Tommy: End with a mexican wave that knocks that cunt out Tommy: She alright? Tommy: I just saw a flash of Ro, safe to say she ain't Ali: I mean, as much as they're all just using this as an excuse to do that Ali: lowkey have a point on this one Ali: why here and why now Ali: its disrespectful Tommy: Talk to her Tommy: Someone's clearly keeping Ro in the loop somehow, is that likely to be her? Ali: Idk Ali: I don't think its her style Ali: she isn't doing it to be malicious to Ro but yeah, idk why she is Tommy: Is she proper 💘 on Drew Tommy: 'Cause lord Ali: How could anyone be Tommy: I have literally no clue Tommy: But Ro's not 💔 about her German accent or whatever Tommy: It's all about him so there's gotta be something we're missing Ali: Oh, that ain't about him Ali: about a lot of things but him being a vessel for her intimacy issues and insecurities is just one of 'em Tommy: So he could've been anyone? Score - 1 for Romeo Ali: Any dickhead who's not gonna make it real on his end and ruin the fairytale, yeah Ali: dime a dozen Tommy: ☕ Ali: safe to say he's fucked the narrative still tho Ali: although, has he? 'cos secretly feeds into the 'i'm wrong and strange' deal we all know is there Tommy: Savage Tommy: But accurate Ali: I know Ali: Die before I said it to her face, like but Ali: makes me worried if she needs to prove that theory right again he could make a reappearance Ali: everyone loves a bit of self-destruction Ali: can't judge but I am Tommy: Samsies Tommy: Fuck's sake Tommy: This family Ali: Rocky the only one with a healthy functioning relationship tbh Tommy: The realest Tommy: Even ma's met her match in ro rn though Tommy: She's lowkey freaking me out and I'm used to you weirdos Ali: Explain Ali: I've seen her at her freakiest, remember, so are we talking worse? Tommy: True maybe I'm just out of practice Tommy: Ghost like vibes catching me off guard Ali: We'll have to keep an eye on the food Ali: she doesn't eat much, and never in front of any of us now Ali: but I can tell when she's had something Ali: make sure we're not hungerstrike vibes again Tommy: I reckon she'll be alright-ish when you get home Tommy: Much as she ever is, you know Tommy: ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ Tommy: She's not gonna want to go to hospital or any of that shit Ali: Yeah, you're right Ali: I'm being dramatic, it's catching Tommy: 👑 Tommy: Bea will be if she sees her Tommy: Jesus take the wheel and spare me that Ali: 😬 Ali: can hear the 'I told you so' from here Ali: we're all thinking it but shh Tommy: Inside voices like we do at least Ali: Never know Ali: might be the motivation she needs Ali: Bea disappointment Tommy: Oh snap Ali: You know it works Ali: on Fraze too 😂 Tommy: 😂 Tommy: Yeah