#'i can't tell you how i really feel bc i frankly need therapy'

[mermaidsirennikita]

sometimes it drives me literally insane to see romance requests that are like

--I want a romance wherein it's basically the happy epilogue throughout the book

--I want a romance that has great communication and they never withhold anything from each other ever

--no "miscommunication trope"

The last thing is just a general gripe about how so many of the things people say are tropes are not tropes, and it's pedantic and snobby but like. Miscommunication is so broad. It's not a trope. People are miscommunicating. WHAT are they miscommunicating about? Is one of them keeping a secret identity from their partner? Because a secret identity romance iS a trope. Is one of them withholding their feelings out of fear of rejection?

Because people DO miscommunicate. Often writers do write it clumsily. If people miscommunicate for no reason, sure, whatever. But if they miscommunicate BECAUSE of a REASON--like, often it's not even miscommunication lol. It's the hero keeping his dire supernatural secret from his wife because she'll die if she finds out (honestly, valid to me, but whatever). It's the heroine finding it difficult to trust the hero with her heart because her dad left when she was young (maybe cliche in theory, but actually a very real thing that happens).

If all you want is plotless nothing wherein everyone is happy and nobody makes mistakes, I personally have a hard time thinking of it as a book, because there is no story. It's just vibes. And essentially EVERY time, people have to mess up and make mistakes in order for there to be a plot.

I just don't understand the point.

#romance novel blogging #if all you want is pure vibes what you want is a short form story or fanfic sorry #you don't want a book #and i'm not saying every writer does miscommunication right--romance has a lot of clumsy writers who just shove it in #(lmao) #but miscommunication is often a backbone in its most broad form of conflict #'i cannot tell you this thing because i am scared for you' #'i cannot tell you this thing because i'm scared of what you'll think of me' #'i can't tell you how i really feel bc i frankly need therapy' #these are all forms of miscommunication and the thing is that when a writer does it well you don't even call it 'miscommunication trope' #but you'll still dismiss miscommunication as bad #the long game by rachel reid is a great example #generally a really well-received book! #ilya gets distant with shane and shane doesn't take ilya's feelings as much as he should #bc ilya has depression and is not telling shane about it #and there is NO REASON for ilya to do this other than internalized shame and a tendency to hide his pain to keep others happy #this is miscommunication!!! they are not communicating well!!! and people still like the book bc rachel reid is a good writer #who knows how to convey this in a way that isn't annoying and is relatable #lol ofc all of this is also symptomatic of the fact that people can't read nuance anymore apparently #and 'character behaves badly = book bad' #(for the record ilya and shane miscommunicate a lot in both books but those books are widely loved bc again rachel is a good writer)

[shrimpmandan]

no malice meant here but like. hey. sometimes when someone makes a joke about something publicly, it is actually not about you/the person you're imagining is the victim of the joke. when trans girls talk about eggs, they're not talking about "men who are feminine" or "men who should identify as women actually" or "men we want to pressure". like that's why people get upset or laugh at you when you equivalate the two. it's seeing someone talk about their own life experience and assuming they are talking about someone else entirely, and then getting mad at them for being so mean to that someone else. and more importantly (the motive for my call) the reason trans women are so bothered by the modern condemnation of "egg jokes" is because people condemning them (like you) are equating a joke about lived experience to an active malicious effort. like yeah are some people gonna make a joke of this genre that's in poor taste? maybe. but people attack trans women for these jokes way harder than they would anyone else for making a bad joke. it's making a mountain out of a molehill and frames all trans women as malicious, just for talking about their own experiences (as so-called eggs) in a way that may be relatable to others. a woman saying "haha liking X thing is so eggy/doing X things means you're trans!!" is simply NOT pressure to transition. it is NOT saying that men can't be feminine. it is NOT telling the reader of the joke to /do/ anything. when you see a woman making an egg joke and respond with "umm don't pressure men to transition!" you are, frankly, accusing that woman of something she is not doing, whether you meant to or not, and quieting her when she attempted to talk to a group of likeminded people about herself. It discourages other women to talk about their own lives and makes a lot of the transfemme community feel as if they must walk on egg shells if they dare crack a joke in public. even if you believe the joke was in poor taste or implies something you disagree with about gender, there is a need to meter your response according to the severity of the situation. is an egg joke, made by trans people for trans people to see, actually worth a public negative response? particularly a response that implies that trans women are manipulating, sinister people who want to convert you and laugh about it? even if someone thinks the jokes or one specific egg joke was bad, you can see how the severity of backlash to it (ie current egg discourse) might be disproportionate to the offense. how trans women might feel that they're being punished too much for something that was very obviously not meant to be taken that way. if you think egg jokes are "the same as conversion therapy" in any way at all, youre asserting that trans women have ***any*** realistic intent to "forcibly convert" men to transition. you know that's not true right? like, think about what you imply by interpreting so MANY women like this. would you assert this about trans men who make jokes about seeing signs of their transness in their past? or men who wishfully entertain the idea of an afab celebrity being trans masc? that's what these jokes are, it's really not malicious, I promise. Again sorry for dropping in here I'm not trying to be mean or angry or anything at you, just informative bc I think a lot of people really don't understand how shitty it feels to be on the other end of this. Have a good day!

Holy mother of text wall batman, but I'll try to parse this.

My biggest thing is I did not read the OP as being ABOUT jokes, or as being a joke in and of itself. Whatsoever. I was taking it as a criticism of anti-egg culture as a whole. There is a non-insignificant amount of people who do genuinely attempt to pressure GNC people into identifying in a way that they simple do not, in either direction. The long and the short of it really is just that I was not taking it as being referring to jokes or memes. I was taking the post at face value, especially since it was also directly comparing "men can be feminine" to 1-to-1 conversion therapy rhetoric, when that is extremely contextual.

Also, any trans person can participate in the harmful side of egg culture. The friend I was talking about was a cis dude being badgered by a trans man. He was outright harassed by that person actually simply for asserting that he himself did not identify as trans just for being a crossdresser. I think it's fucked up to pressure people to identify in a way that they do not, no matter who's doing it and for what ends. I don't want cis people telling me, a tranny, how to identify. We shouldn't tell cis people how to identify either. I do not think of shitty Reddit memes or trans people talking about their childhoods when I think of egg culture. I think of people I know personally who have been harassed by people who take it upon themselves to 'crack eggs', so to speak.

TL;DR: I did not interpret the post as being about what it was later (albeit rudely, not by you) clarified to be about. People seem to be taking my response (which said that it is bad to say "but men can be feminine!!!" to trans women/amab NBs) as me having an issue with Reddit trans memes about personal discovery, when that's just not what I equate egg culture with. It's also extremely condescending to act like this is coming out of a place of "oh, the evil trans women are going to convert the cissies into trannies!" when I, 1) am trans, and 2) do not associate egg culture exclusively with trans women by a landslide.

#anon #asks #i really should put something in my pinned about not sending me unbroken text walls like this bc they're hard to read lmao #but yeah i also? wasn't malicious? I was politely disagreeing with a post because i misinterpreted it

[khaleesiofalicante]

"I wanted every piece of me to crash into every piece of you, I swear to God that's how they make stars" Mary Lambert

This isn’t the first time someone had mistaken David for his father. They better be careful 🔪

What if Max didn’t want to move in because he didn’t want to live with David?

What if he didn’t think it would be fun to live with David?

They are both idiots huh???

“But I can handle it-”

“I don’t think it’s a good idea-”

“I said I can handle it!” David yelled.

Ok, give this boy a break or his going to have a breakdown soon

“Ask for help,” she said again. “And if you are feeling overwhelmed, take a break.”

“But the institute-”

“-is not going to go anywhere,” she said.

I am loyal to one (1) goodness 😌

“Why do people call me baby boy or baby girl?” David wondered out loud.

“Because you are baby,” his father popped him on the nose.

Yeah, he's got a point. I looove Jace and David's interactions🥺🥺 they make me so emo!!!

“I can’t see anything,” she frowned. “It’s dark.”

///

“I see…I see a prince,”

Should I be worried or should I be fucking terrified???

He wanted to say something. But what was at the tip of his tongue was neither kind nor necessary. More people should follow this...

In your face, Mal!!! He prefers David 😎

Not another attack!

Looveee how the starts of the POV's complement with exactly how I feel about the end of the other one jsgskdk

Rafael and Camilla's friendship is just so goddamn amazing!!!

“What? Who in my family snitched?” Rafael gasped. “Wait. Was it Lily?”

“It was actually Gigi,” Camila giggled.

“Wait. Does everyone know?” Rafael asked in horror.

Yeah, not a smart decision to leave your family with that biig knowledge...

Wife.

Wow.

Wife is his favorite word now and no one can change my mind

“I’m not asking for your permission,” Rafael said quickly. “It’s sexist and archaic and frankly, Anjali would kill me if she found out.”

Diego chuckled at that.

“But you two are the most important people in the world to her,” Rafael said gently. “And it would mean a lot to me if I could have your blessing.”

Before he knew it, Diego was pulling him into a hug and muttering softly in Spanish, and kissing Rafael on the head.

AAAAHHH THIS SCENE MAKE ME SCREAM AND I WOKE MY MOM UP BUT ITS SO WORTH IT😭🥺💙💙

The woman covered her mouth with a hand and sighed. “It’s as beautiful as my Anjali.”

Rafael smiled. “Not really. But it’s pretty close.”

///

Rafael laughed at that. "I will take good care of her. I promise."

This man is so in love it's getting annoying...jk, jk I absolutely love him❤️

I support Rosewood above everything else bc just look at them!!! Power couple, but also soft with each other, but also badass and smart af, and-

Marry me. Marry me. Marry me.

FOR GODS SAKE JUST ASK HER ALREADY!!! I CAN'T STAND THE WAITING 😭

He knew the small ones worked.

He heard the whispers in the shadow world.

He knew it worked.

He just needed to make sure the big ones would work too.

I don't know what he's talking about and at this point I am afraid to ask...

He wanted magic to be like water.

A resource.

Something everyone could have. Something everyone can benefit from.

Ok, that is a really noble cause and shit, but who exactly is going to suffer the consequences of this???

“Yes,” he replied. “It’s my destiny, Mal. This is what I was born to do. It will work.”

"I know," she smiled at him. "My destiny is Max."

Have y'all consider.. therapy???

“Tell me everything you know about Anjali.” If you so much as THINK of hurting her, I will fucking end you🔪 and I know Rafael will too!!!

Alexandra, get your gay together!! Just do it!!!

“No one has seen shadow demons,” Lexi sighed with disappointment. “They’re extinct.” I feel like they are not extinct enough... (I laughed at my own joke omg jshsksn)

“No fire message?” Lexi frowned.

“Why would we send those when we can text?” Gabriel asked her incredulously and walked away.

Selena sighed dramatically. “I love them.”

Both of them are so sexy for it tbh...

“She was talking about some issue with the warlocks in LA not being able to use magic. I think it’s resolved now." Getting increasingly more concerned about this...

“I think so,” Liv whispered. “Are you trying to come out to me? Because it won’t make a difference to me. I love you. Regardless of how you identify.” omfg😂😂 like, this was so sweet but you got the completely wrong idea!! I mean no one can blame her, Lexi was definitely not clear AT ALL!!

“A boat needs two people to move, or it will be lost,” Lexi explained.

“You want to have a threesome?” Liv asked.

“By the angel!” Lexi yelled. “Liv! Stop reading into this too much!”

“Then what am I supposed to do?” Liv looked very confused. “I don’t get it.”

Jshskdjdkdk please, they are both so chaotic and I love them so much😂💙

“And then the kite is flying and-holy fucking shit.”

“What happened to the kite?” Liv asked.

Obsessed at how she is worried for the kite lmao

“It’s a warlock,” Gabriel said. “A warlock is portaling into the institute, summoning demons and commanding them to attack.” FUCK!! WHAT DOES THIS MEAN??? WHAT'S HAPPENING??

Ok, gotta go to think about all the possible things this can go wrong... See you next week!!!

💙.💙.💙.

The quote is so *chef’s kiss* omg how you find this shit 😍😍😍

Here is a David tiktok for you 😎

#lbaf