#❝ r. bennett ❞ ┆ meme reply ┆ everything feels so permanent !

[redemptioninterlude]

“Will you stay with me? Just until I fall asleep?” // rue

hurt / comfort meme ( accepting ) + @depictedblue // cassie

cass is like, A REALLY NICE GIRL. a lot of people forget about that fact because she grows into a body that rue knows doesn't feel like hers. but there she shines, the centre of attention ; her and maddy perez, the sugar and spice of their school hierarchy. people are like, really quick to forget you're a person in high school, apt to playing games and making things feel, like, really fucking shit sometimes... and cass, unfortunately, gets the blunt end of that. it's in her, it's in all the boys that she's loved before, and all the boys yet to come. that hope, that desire, that somewhere within those arms, she might forget the one person who was supposed to love her regardless of everything.

people sneer when talking about daddy issues. but they're like, kind of a big deal and really fucking hurtful, and rue like, gets that. maybe hers shade in different colours, but it's still there, the insult, the sting of it that doesn't come out, no matter what your insistence. she spends the night - the dinner is awkward. cassie hasn't told her mom but people leaked her nudes, and, the guys were talking about it over lunch. lexi, as usual, sends. her a BLEAK LOOK over the homework she's finishing off, but cassie, oh... she runs. and come the night, she's up late on her phone, and lexi, she's already asleep. the quiet eating them alive, before she speaks, to break the spell of it.

" will you stay with me? just until i fall asleep? "

she doesn't say anything at first. staring at her from over the top of the couch, rue biting down at her bottom lip, wishing she was just, like, BETTER at knowing what to say. but the truth of it? was that she knew cassie didn't want flowery words or anything like that. she'd had enough of that shit, hadn't she? moving then, long legs from beneath the velvet smoothness of her covers, up and over to the bed that stood on elevated frilliness, there, there... crawling into the narrow space that she knew was typically reserved for maddy or kat. it's fine. she knows cassie just needs a little comfort, sliding in to wrap her arms around her for a moment. "... i know it sucks. but this shit? it's... it's just like, fucking temporary. it'll be okay. i got you. lexi has you. we're all here."

#❝ r. bennett ❞ ┆ meme reply ┆ everything feels so permanent ! #❝ r. bennett ❞ ┆ canon verse ┆ drugs are kind of cool ! #depictedblue

[redemptioninterlude]

“I might have had a few shots.” //rue

the random meme ( accepting ) + @sunxsin // ling ( mentions of @kschmidts and @ripjulie )

really, she ought to feel more nervous about being around him. but rue finds it's so much easier than people imagine to separate things sometimes, because, it's just... never going to happen. and she's known what happens when you let it all build up until it all just BURSTS from inside your chest, and she's not like, looking for some repeat performance of how pathetic she could be when she had a crush on someone and... urgh. was that what this was? a feeling that twisted within her chest when she looked at him, that something that she was swallowing alive up until now, was, that what all of this was?

god, could this get any more FRUSTRATING?

and of course, when he appears to come pick her up ( for weed and vibes, he says ), it's so hard not to stare. when he looks so good and has her heart just like, CLANGING on the inside, she grins, and off they go, like nothing's remiss. and like, she's really good at this part, the lying. she's had how many years of experience? she's having a good time and she's wearing one of her dad's sweaters and oversized jeans to match. it's funny, how in the circus, you could really see the differences in how people perceived a party, within their immediate circle.

at a certain point, she loses track of ling. does shots with kate, and sings a song with julie. it's about having a good time and honestly, when amongst friends like this, who could go out feeling less than well loved? they all talk about the mystery of who spilled julie's brushes and rue asks if they're really going to have to go searching for the bad guy and brightens up at the idea of it all when a hand taps at her shoulder, SPINNING ROUND to find herself faced with a rather red-cheeked ling.

“I might have had a few shots.”

"oh yeah?" she doesn't sound surprised at all, shooting the girls a look before she's grabbing ling a water, pressing it into his hands. "how many shots is like, the most shots you've ever done before?" she asks with ALL THE GRAVITY of his answer changing the course of how she thought about him. nah... it's nothing that serious, but she was enjoying the way it was like, kinda comfortable for them, leaning back onto the heels of her converses. "think you could do like, one more? or are you tapped out?" rue's left peering at the bottle in his hands, nose wrinkling in realisation. "what are you drinking? soju? ling, oh my god, that stuff's... like, that stuff's literally just water! come on, we're gonna go do a real shot together, right now, let's go."

#sunxsin #❝ r. bennett ❞ ┆ meme reply ┆ everything feels so permanent ! #❝ r. bennett ❞ ┆ horror verse ┆ trying to outrun your anxiety !

[redemptioninterlude]

"I pay attention to things that most people ignore." (from Casey to Rue)

guts! the meme ( accepting ) + @notfrsale // casey

tick. tock. tick. tock. what's happening now as rue waits? she's never good at this part, the patient bit. to her it's like, the WORST PART of it all, and she knows, oh god she knows what it means to feel sick and wanting with unspoken things winding tightly within your chest. with casey it's almost impossible to ignore. it's one sided, she knows it, it has to be because god, this girl was made of fire and magic and beauty and terror, and she knew it. she fucking knew it, and what could rue ever do with someone so sure? so well wrapped in family and the allure of the circus?

to be washed out with adoration, it's rue's speciality. to miss the forest for the trees, or in this case, the murderer within the girl. for rue, she just sees the one that gives her a dress, who talks and hangs out with her and shows her a whole new world contained within a tent, beneath the big top. and sure, her like, siblings are kinda... different... but casey was warm, and lovely, and kind. and better yet, when she saw casey coming up, she had with her something UNEXPECTED within her hands, rue blinking twice as she rushed up forwards to sweep the other girl into a ginger hug, not wanting to crush what she held.

honestly she didn't expect it. it's breakfast of all things, her favourite meal. and not only that, it's like, the way that rue fucking loves it too, her lips curving into a warmer grin. "like... no syrup?" she doesn't see any, not even in a package on the side. she... kinda HATES SYRUP, and she never said that shit out loud, but like, she seemed to get it almost immediately after they'd had breakfast at that one place on west front like, once.

"I pay attention to things that most people ignore."

"you're just..." god. she's such a fucking baby for getting kinda emotional over it all, but who could blame her? it's just like, nice to be SEEN by someone you cared about so much, peeking at the other bag held. "wait. are we gonna do like... a whole breakfast outside thing? god. you're fucking amazing, you know that, right?"

#notfrsale #❝ r. bennett ❞ ┆ canon verse ┆ drugs are kind of cool ! #❝ r. bennett ❞ ┆ meme reply ┆ everything feels so permanent !

[redemptioninterlude]

Send 💡 for our muses to wait out a power outage together // gia

bad situation meme ( no longer accepting ) + @brokenegoed // gia

exhale slow - she's just tired. it's already late, and it's her and gia and the house is empty, mom's out on the night shift... 2 jobs. it's one of those CRAZY THINGS that she's come to do to help manage the fucking nuclear blowout after their dad dies. it's like. all the debt. the house. the everything. they're only fucking kids, but rue knows better than most the way to dodge collections calls, the way her eyes know to skip over certain letters in the main, the red print, the angry accusations.

it's her and gia and rue's getting together everything that they need for mac and cheese when the power cuts - it's like, 8 pm and it's been storming for hours, so when it happens there's a startled silence that lasts for a solid moment before rue's voice, disembodied, could be heard drawling an 'ummmmmm' from within the darkness, before she's peeling into A FIT of laughter. "uhhhh, well-" fuck me, right? there's a low groan, rue reaching out to find her little sister's arm in the dark, the both of them feeling their way around as their eyes grew accustomed to the dark.

"sooooo your choices are... cereal and milk, or cereal and expired milk, which is what happens if you wanna be picky about the whole thing and wait until mom gets home." rue THINKS that she sounds like she knows what she's doing when she says it, like they're not like, 14 and 11 just trying to figure their shit out. it's fine. they're fine. aren't they always fine? the both of them, soon thereafter, on the couch eating fruit loops, no television to numb them in its static, but the both of them, crunching away in the dark, rue's arm slung casual over gia's shoulders as they waited out the storm together.

#brokenegoed #❝ r. bennett ❞ ┆ canon verse ┆ drugs are kind of cool ! #❝ r. bennett ❞ ┆ meme reply ┆ everything feels so permanent !

[redemptioninterlude]

Send 🚗 for our muses to get stuck on the side of the road together when the car breaks down / rue & o

bad situation meme ( accepting ) + @headstrongblake // octavia

okay but like - where the fuck was ROADSIDE ASSISTANCE when you needed it? anxiety lances like a boil within her, bubbling, trouble, as she paces about the cracked cement. it's really her fault and she knows it, thus the worry, the guilt, that slicks on the inside of her mouth. let's take the scenic route, she'd suggested, thinking that it'd be like. nice. cute. something for the both of them to cling onto because like, rue's still trying to figure out what the hell she felt half the time. in? out? friends? something else? her head's a mess and she's never been good at navigating through feelings, and honestly, she thought this whole day trip out of town would help them and instead...

they're fucking baking in the sun out here. the car was a death trap of heat at this point, a clunker that they'd used for their last road trip across the country, the both of them like, SOLIDLY DETERMINED to make it to the beach back then. to go down the coast, to fucking find themselves or whatever lie that they'd sold themselves at the insistence that they weren't simply running away from what was hard. from what they knew was waiting in the aftermath of o's overdose and rue's fumbling problems when it came to dealing with it.

she thought it would make things better. leave it to rue to FUCK THINGS UP.

so she feels like fucking horrible about it, nervous glances passed as she smokes, endlessly, at the spare joints that she had stored in the car dash. octavia still there beneath the hood of the car, working away, rue's nervous energy likely doing nothing to help resolve the issue, flitting around like the mess she was. "can i DO with anything?" no, you idiot, you've done enough - trying to bite back at her own worry, knowing just how unreasonable that was when it came to octavia. "d... do you want a drink? there's still a little water left."

#headstrongblake #❝ r. bennett ❞ ┆ canon verse ┆ drugs are kind of cool ! #❝ r. bennett ❞ ┆ meme reply ┆ everything feels so permanent !

[redemptioninterlude]

[ 𝐒𝐎𝐅𝐓 ]. rue rue!

the 5 senses meme ( accepting ) + @depictedmorada // maddy [ 𝐒𝐎𝐅𝐓 ] ― sender wraps a soft blanket around receiver’s shoulders

Rue thinks it's like, a mess of unfair circumstance. That Maddy's fallen for the wrong boy and sees her heart broken. It sucks and it's like, kind of the least interesting part of her, because maybe as teenagers they see where it begins now, and having lived long enough, they see the consequence of these types of loves in the adults around them. Maddy moves on from her betrayal from Nate Jacobs far sooner than anybody gives her credit for. What they don't understand, is that it isn't really about THE BOY at all. It's about the fact that it's Cassie, and what Cassie meant to the other girl. How betrayals from the ones you swore your girlhood loyalties to burned your bones into ash.

It's in the days after she throws that bomb into their friendship, Maddy comes by, all solemn and proud, though the sleeplessness that painted itself BENEATH HER EYES told another story. How Rue struggled to peel her gaze off the ground, knowing she did this in a way, though, it's kind of hard to know how to be properly apologetic when you're in the high throes of a fucking drug withdrawal, and she's shaking like a fucking leaf at the door. "M-Maddy, hey..."

But it's not even the nerves that get her in the end, but the way the other girl drawls on about girl code and saying something sooner. And Rue isn't really sure what she says to that, but knows that Maddy's rolling her eyes, the other's arm looping around hers to DRAG HER INSIDE, sitting her down on the couch, a blanket tucked in around her shoulders. Something to help with the shivering... how she already knows what to do, as if she's been made to play the caretaker one too many times. "Maddy, I'm..." her hand reaching out to grasp at the other's arm, just as she's talking about if she's got anything to eat in here, playing all these things up just to make it all seem okay, like nothing's happened, nothing at all. "I'm fucking sorry. I know how... I... I know how much she means to you."

#depictedmorada #❝ r. bennett ❞ ┆ canon verse ┆ drugs are kind of cool ! #❝ r. bennett ❞ ┆ meme reply ┆ everything feels so permanent !

[redemptioninterlude]

❛  what do you want from me?  ❜ / rue

6 word stories meme ( accepting ) + @auragifted // warren

part of her isn't sure if this shit is real. or if she's just... who knows. projecting. looking at shit at weird angles when she's high, because, she just... she knows. like even if it doesn't come up often because ling doesn't know yet how to cope or react to it, she knows. that their peace and love right now is kind of built on the back of someone else's SACRIFICE. maybe this is guilt that hangs heavy about her neck that has her dreaming about him more than ever. warren, who dies before her eyes and who's blood she falls into on the way out of being dragged to some god forsaken nowhere. it's terrifying, isn't it? when ling wasn't himself. when it's something else there, that warren tried so valiantly to save him from. it's just...

it's a FUCKING LOT, isn't it?

❛  what do you want from me?  ❜

there's a pause ; where her lips purse together thoughtfully, gaze avoidant. he's dead, rue. none of this shit is real, anyways. maybe that makes her SAD OR BRAVE, it's hard to tell. is it a dream? something else? something in between it all? he'd always had... something else to him. a power that rue halfway didn't believe until... well. she never believed in any of that shit before, but the supernatural leaks inwards, it's hard to avoid it when she's seen things play out before her eyes that she'd never thought could be possible before but. now she's left having to say something, taking a longer breath. "thank you. i guess it's always been that. we're getting married! can you believe it? just. there's... there's so much i guess... that i can have now because of you. so thank you. really because... i just. i don't think it would have been possible without you."

#auragifted #❝ r. bennett ❞ ┆ meme reply ┆ everything feels so permanent ! #❝ r. bennett ❞ ┆ actress verse ┆ you wish i was different ? so do i !

[redemptioninterlude]

❛  just tell me what to do.  ❜ (rue)

6 word stories meme ( accepting ) + @griefknown // elena ( ft @witchwrld )

like, summers visiting her cousin are always A LITTLE BIT strange. but like, it's not a big deal or anything - mystic falls still had stuff to do, even if it experiences the seasons and small town americana more than east highland ever did. but she meets so many new people... both kind, and like, kinda weird. but elena isn't so bad, is she? a friend of her cousin, and bonnie like, wouldn't really get her all mixed up with the wrong kinda people. they go to parties... they pass the time. and like, along the way?

rue finds she really does like elena. she's sweet and smart and like, even if she's always got BOY TROUBLES, she kinda figures it out on her own. her life's a mess, but in a controlled way, meaning rue can do what she does best - watch to see what unfolds before her. she'll pop pills and come by and hang out, and like, they're having a good time before... well. the fucking panic attack sets in, rue feeling as if the ceiling's spinning, the ground uneven. a stumble, a dizzying clutch at her chest, but there? there's elena right there at her side, suddenly at her arm.

❛  just tell me what to do.  ❜

but rue doesn't know what has her all worked up, looking up at her, pleading, head shaking slightly from the stress of it all. "c-can you just get me out of here?" it's a request spit through clenched teeth, anxiety creeping up the back of her throat, leaving her wanting to throw up from the worst of this. no. no... it's going to BE FINE. she just needs fresh air, her breathing temporarily tilted. "pr... probably bad drugs or... fuck. just don't tell bon bon, okay?"

#griefknown #❝ r. bennett ❞ ┆ meme reply ┆ everything feels so permanent ! #❝ r. bennett ❞ ┆ horror verse ┆ trying to outrun your anxiety !

[redemptioninterlude]

❛  you don't mean that, do you?  ❜ // Rue

6 word stories meme ( accepting ) + @depictedblue // cassie

chest tight - they're left glaring at one another, cassie, rue... the both of them over dinner, with, missus howard freaking out and saying she needed lexi in the kitchen. how words couldn't really be TAKEN BACK after they'd been said, much like cassie couldn't take back how she'd had it worse, a secret spilled over dinner by lexi, her mouth set into a thin line. sobriety wears kind of mean on rue, who doesn't really love the feelings that come with it, and who feels as if the wholeness of what she'd said just fucking sucked. so maybe... rue's casually spearing her fork into her fish when she says that at least she's never been so desperate as to fuck her best friend's boyfriend. and maybe then? that's when the dinner table explodes.

❛  you don't mean that, do you?  ❜

it's just rue and cassie at the table now, lexi hissing something unheard within the kitchen, and the clanging of pots, and pans, and obvious DISCOURSE from within. it's probably something she was never meant to know or hear or understand, because like, it's just one of those things that people don't say out loud. wouldn't dare to, in her own presence, rue still eating as if nothing was wrong, glancing up mid-chew. taking her time to swallow, hands folding on the table in front of her. "i do. you know what everyone's saying. you were never dumb, cassie. just like, desperate to be loved. no matter where it came from or what hole you had to barter off to make it happen. you can go ahead and tell yourself whatever little excuses you want to make yourself feel better about it. but everybody?"

and at this, she's using her fork to point RIGHT AT HER, staring down the barrel of it. "everybody fucking knows the truth. so yeah. maybe you're right, cas. maybe you have it worse because my dad died and your dad just stopped giving a shit about you. but at least i take out all that pain of mine on myself. you? you don't give a shit who you burn along the way." the fork scrapes against her plate ; she pushing another bite in. "... can you pass the pepper?"

#depictedblue #❝ r. bennett ❞ ┆ canon verse ┆ drugs are kind of cool ! #❝ r. bennett ❞ ┆ meme reply ┆ everything feels so permanent !

[redemptioninterlude]

Smash or Pass , ani to rue >:)

send smash or pass for an honest reaction ( accepting ) + @sylkshe // ani

the question sort of catches her OFF GUARD - rue's eyes widening as they meet over the top of her glass to meet with ani's own. it's unexpectedly bold of her to say - and completely out of the blue, at least within rue's eyes. after all, why would she ever expect anybody to look at her in that light? and besides - she was with ling! she kind of like, didn't really see anybody else because of it.

that tiny stutter that rolls off the tip of her tongue, teeth gnawing and pulling at her bottom lip as she tried to laughing it off in her usual distracted manner. "oh um... me? for you?" as if that part wasn't OBVIOUS, rue! stomach clenching tighter in that moment to buy herself a moment, waving a hand. "ani, you're beautiful, you know that right? hahaha ling would be jealous if he heard you say that joke!" trying to lighten the mood as she bounced her hands off of her knees, looking around the bonfire. "d... did you wanna get another drink? come on let's get another drink."

#sylkshe #❝ r. bennett ❞ ┆ canon verse ┆ drugs are kind of cool ! #❝ r. bennett ❞ ┆ meme reply ┆ everything feels so permanent !

[redemptioninterlude]

[ LAP ] + reverse // rue

domestic intimacy meme ( accepting ) + @bnchee // sawyer [ lap ] sender receiver pulls receiver sender into their lap

they're like, taking ideas. what to do, where to go, they're all high, and that makes for a pretty FUCKING CHILL NIGHT, she thinks. weed blown, moly popped, everything's sort of wired through and circling round and like, rue barely can tell what's up and what's down. everything that they laugh about, as the joint makes it round the circle, huddling close, with hands blown around the cold that bites at their fingertips. california in a cold snap, its teenaged renegades still willing to face the brunt of its terror.

the most sober of them says they go grab pizza, which is like, a pretty fucking rad idea to a bunch of kids looking to stuff themselves with skint wallets. who's going is piled up into the car, and rue there in the backseat at the left hand side, window rolled down so that she could stick her face out, breathing in that COOL AIR, her head left spinning. but there, there? what was that?

out comes sawyer, running up as the LAST MINUTE ADDITION, even though the car's like, full up. she wants to come, she says with that grin on her face, and rue hasn't closed the door yet and... she isn't really thinking. just reaching out to pull her in, sawyer left settled within her lap, making for a crunched space back there, but who's complaining? not rue, who's face is have pressed against the other's back, flushed and embarrassed because... what the fuck was she doing, exactly?

#bnchee #❝ r. bennett ❞ ┆ canon verse ┆ drugs are kind of cool ! #❝ r. bennett ❞ ┆ meme reply ┆ everything feels so permanent !

[redemptioninterlude]

❛ how often do people literally die laughing? ❜ - mei chang @ rue bennett !

everything, everywhere, all at once meme ( accepting ) + @chmerical // mei ( ft big bro @sunxsin )

rue is pretty sure that she's IN LOVE. which is sort of a big thing to say when she's only really been dating ling for like, a couple of weeks. but fuck that shit. she was. and she knew that in the 15 years of her life, and especially with what happened to her dad that like... it's the only time she's really felt happy without a handful of pills, and bottle of vodka pressed to her lips. he asks her out at her lockers over lunch, and rue's like, feeling nothing but static in her ears for a moment, head thunking back against the metal as if for the physical reality check of it it. "what?" chest all tight, worming, and hot. but he repeats it with that stupid grin of his and she's just... she'd lost, before she'd even known that the game had begun.

and since then? it's been pretty fucking awesome to be honest. things happening in a whirlwind affair, like getting caught up in a upwards spiral for once. rue meets like, a bunch of people that she kinda knew in the periphery before. like mei, who's ling's half sister and who she honestly only knew as being IN AND OUT of his life over the years. fucked up family shit, she's told, which she gets, but mei's like, so fucking cool, she can't imagine what anybody could have against her. plus, she does like, martial arts, and even though they're not super alike, she feels reminded of gia, of her softness, her bite.

they're stumbling into his house, his dad gone for business. it's one of those moments where he tells her that she can like, spend the night, and she's all wired and giddy for first time things. even if she doesn't really know what all of that means just yet, she loves the thrill of knowing that they can stay closer. they kiss at the front door, fumbling in the dark as he pulls her up within his arms, rue's JUST LAUGHING before she kisses him again, and she's so in love, isn't she? that feeling resonating, bubbling, fizzling, bubble gum pop in its infectiousness.

❛ how often do people literally die laughing? ❜

the sound of a voice chills her to the bone. head turning, in tune with ling's own, as they realise that MEI IS HERE, a sound escaping rue's mouth that sounded akin to dying. her face buries itself, and it looks as if she were just about ready to jump out of her skin, not knowing what to say about it when she wants to try to like. fucking... explain this shit away, or at least apologise... but the chance is almost stolen. ling hoisting her further up within his arms, taking her off towards his room as rue's eyes snap open, frantic, meeting mei's smirking expression with an exasperated one of her own. "i'm sorry!!!" the words shouted, as she get's hauled up the stairs. "we won't do anything, i swear!!!"

#chmerical #❝ r. bennett ❞ ┆ canon verse ┆ drugs are kind of cool ! #❝ r. bennett ❞ ┆ meme reply ┆ everything feels so permanent !

[redemptioninterlude]

❛ the only thing i do know is we have to be kind. be kind. especially, when we don't know what's going on. ❜

everything, everywhere, all at once meme ( accepting ) + @sylkshe // ani ( ft @sunxsin and @chmerical )

rue meets ani 2 years ago. it's over the summer and she's like, just really getting started in college. everything feels sort of new and sort of EXPERIENCED, and rue, she's back at camp silver lakes for the second time ever. the first was sort of just a dare, almost. like a something to keep them all together, rue, ling, kat, maddy... they're trying to put together excuses to stay together, and plus, so many things are changing! it's kind of exciting, a thrill that cuts to the bone. and she's getting older, and, debatably wiser. 19, and living on her own with someone that she loves, keeping track of all her awesome friends, isn't that like, the goal of... whatever the fuck this life is supposed to be about?

it's by the water, and maybe she like, doesn't expect someone else to be here. ani, who sits by the water with her long hair, ani, who's all dressed simply with bare feet dug into the sand, who stares at the water as if she were looking for home. and rue, who isn't really super familiar yet with the people from town, COUGHS OUT LOUD so that she doesn't startle her, a little shy for the fact that it felt like she'd interrupted a moment for her. how pretty she was, and the two of them introduce themselves and she takes a seat too, right there to watch the sea with her. it's a certain calm, and rue asks her, suddenly, if she's she's feeling nervous about the news that someone's disappeared recently.

❛ the only thing i do know is we have to be kind. be kind. especially, when we don't know what's going on. ❜

it's like... kind of a super mature reply! which rue really likes, eyes turning upwards, warm. "i um... you know, i've kinda never really thought about it like that. but... you're right! BEING KIND sometimes is the only answer we got to like, really... fucking... horrible moments. because panicking about all the shit you don't know isn't really gonna help anybody, is it?" her laugh settles... and suddenly, she's more serious. "do you wanna... wanna come out for a swim with me or something? that's what i came here for and like. i'm really enjoying this conversation so... do you... wanna like, hang out or something?"

#sylkshe #❝ r. bennett ❞ ┆ canon verse ┆ drugs are kind of cool ! #❝ r. bennett ❞ ┆ meme reply ┆ everything feels so permanent !

[redemptioninterlude]

❛ We’re in a dream. ❜ / for rue ;)

inception meme ( no longer accepting ) + @auragifted // warren ( ft @sunxsin )

rue doesn't like to think about MT MISERY much. it's kind of where life goes sideways, isn't it? well, no. even that's not true, the black hills leaves them all different people. some ways, better, some ways, worse. ling's the one who really suffered, she thinks... she just had to watch. which terrified and sickened her and she tries not to remember certain things, like the way the blood feels on her knees, how she has to scrub it clean off of her, after being sick how many times?

what terror lived in her bones now whenever she saw blood. that she'd been turning down horror roles back to back to back now, with a sickened feeling left to sour within her stomach. a reminder of the things that she was losing, the things that she LOST out there on the snowy mountains.

❛ We’re in a dream. ❜

rue feels a jolt from this ; left looking at him, a familiar face that haunted her from all those nightmares. and this was just another one, right? another nightmare, hands covering her face for a moment to soothe the FLIPPING ANXIETY that twists within her stomach, tongue pressed to the roof of her mouth to try to mute the words she wants to say. "... is this punishment?" it's what she does manage, finally. "f... for trying to be happy after everything that happened?" everything that they did to survive out there... cursed, as perhaps they so rightfully deserved.

#auragifted #❝ r. bennett ❞ ┆ meme reply ┆ everything feels so permanent ! #❝ r. bennett ❞ ┆ actress verse ┆ you wish i was different ? so do i !

[redemptioninterlude]

[ FEED ] sender offers receiver a spoonful of what they’re cooking so receiver can taste it // mei chang & rue bennett

domestic intimacy meme ( no longer accepting ) + @chmerical // mei

so they settle the new place. it's like, boxes on boxes and things on things and ling has so much stuff that she has to corner him into throwing out. it's a joint effort, with mei in the mix, which is something that rue's honestly COMING TO LOVE, because it's like having gia around all over again. a terrible twosome, fighting the forces of... well. it's hardly evil. anymore at least. mei doesn't know about the terrible highs and lows of what happened to them over their filming schedule, and really, they lean into the whole tiktok conspiracy of it that seemed to help inform mei about what was happening between the both of them before mei even actually came into the picture which...

is kinda nice. and kinda awkward. but rue's always been AWKWARD AS FUCK anyways, so none of this is really new, and all of this just bleeds into the fact that... they're doing their best. it's happening as it needs to happen. and while reintroductions of siblings can always be tough, watching them go at it together is like, weirdly wholesome and rue's just happy to be a part of it. plus. mei's like, a super cool kid, and fucking tough as hell, and she knew she had her own things to learn out of her, especially now.

as in, especially when the concept of family for all of them was changing. mei comes with rue and ling to her family's for easter, and it's like, a big deal. it's totally a whole thing and her chest clangs with anxiety over it since like, ling's only met her family once, and she wants mei to have a good time. it helps that she's almost the same age as her sister, and they're all in the kitchen together, helping to cook while her mom runs out to pick up more BREADCRUMBS or whatever. cooking's a whole new thing for her, really.

but mei's pretty good at it! already working on gravy and something else, calling rue over to come HAVE A TASTE, the taller girl slumping there against the countertop, a quiet hum of approval heard from her as she wrapped her arms around her in a quicker squeeze. "fucking amazing. urgh. i can't wait? and hold on, did you add orange to that? fucking perfect. i'm starving, do we really have to wait longer?"

#chmerical #❝ r. bennett ❞ ┆ meme reply ┆ everything feels so permanent ! #❝ r. bennett ❞ ┆ actress verse ┆ you wish i was different ? so do i !

[redemptioninterlude]

[ SHARE ] sender, seeing that receiver is cold, wraps their jacket around them ( for rue )

domestic intimacy meme ( accepting ) + @jeremydied // jeremy

her eyes cast downwards ; her body, slanted. it's just been a long night. maybe that's putting it lighting because like, there's a huge fucking fight that erupts at the party, and rue's just like, really tired and feels where someone shoved her too hard and put an elbow into her rib and now it just like ACHES WHEN SHE BREATHES, and maybe she's being stupid and dramatic about it. but mostly, she doesn't understand why that shit makes her feels sad, so she's trying to just like. wait like this until it stops and the world stops being so loud, and she can just walk home and...

shake this BULLSHIT off.

the molly isn't hitting good anymore, and she thinks that maybe she did too much because everything just kinda sucks right now. or maybe it's that she saw jules with someone else recently and it brought up a lot of WEIRD FEELINGS that she isn't sure she's ready to cope with just yet. it's fine. it's fine, right? needing to take a moment to tilt her head back from the way her gaze pinches and it feels like she's going to cry which is so fucking annoying...

so distracted that she misses where someone appears. jeremy... he's always been nice, hasn't he? not like, the kind of jock douchebag whatever that seemed to populate these kinds of places. and in true jeremy form, he doesn't offer much to say when he claims the seat beside her, letting her wipe, furiously, at her face without remark. she like, DOESN'T WANNA TALK ABOUT IT. instead, he just... unzips his jacket and drapes it across her shoulders, pausing to glance at the joint that sits between her frozen fingers. looking for an excuse, she supposes, to stay a little longer. "wanna hit?" rue offers, unplying her tongue from where she'd allowed it to staple against the roof of her mouth. "i'm kinda fucking really high, anyways."

#jeremydied #❝ r. bennett ❞ ┆ canon verse ┆ drugs are kind of cool ! #❝ r. bennett ❞ ┆ meme reply ┆ everything feels so permanent !