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yuyusuyu · 8 months

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blurred lines and lies — 08. a lie that breaks the line

synopsis. you were always with yeosang, hips stuck together and hands glued to each other. he was all you knew and you were all he knew too for a while, but then you both grew up, one moving at a faster pace than the other. yeosang left you behind to awkwardly navigate the rest of an adventure—high school—without him while he embarked on a new one—college—by himself. the line of being best friends blurred somewhere along the way, and you find yourself crying on the night he promises to be someone else's because you love him. you've always loved kang yeosang ever since the days where he was trying to figure out who he was (an awkward and painful era for any teenager in middle school), loved him ever since his voice began cracking as it's tone deepened, loved him ever since he took you to that stupid and overpriced school dance in middle school despite not liking being in a huge crowd, you loved him ever since he began to become a quiet and reserved man. you hoped to be on the other side of things for once, on the other side of the line of being just best friends with kang yeosang; you realize now that it was stupid of you to ever have that sort of hope. and while you began to calm down, you wonder about what it's like being on the other side of a friendship. you don't know, but you hope to find out as you embark an adventure without him. but you didn't realize what it would it do to you and yeosang, and what it would do to you and choi jongho, your other best friend.

warnings. cheating. if there's anything i should add, let me know!

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JONGHO snorts, grabbing your hand and holding it up in the air. “c’mon,” he says, grinning. “give me a twirl.”

you stick your tongue out at him before complying, twirling around. your lilac dress flutters around you, dying down when you stop. “it’s pretty, right?”

your best friend nods, eyes smiling along with his lips. “yeah,” he says. “really pretty.”

you grow embarrassed at the way he stares at you, so you clear your throat and reach out, grabbing his tie and fixing it for him. “gosh,” you tease, straightening his tie out. “your tie is all crooked. aand better!” you take a step back to admire your work, but stop when jongho’s hand wraps around your waist.

the door opens and you tilt your head to look over at… younghee. you purse your lips.

“it’s time for everyone to go get in their place.” she says, her voice quiet.

jongho squeezes your waist once before he pulls away, leaving you feeling cold. “i’ll see you in a bit,” he says, smiling at you. he gives younghee a polite nod and walks out of the room, leaving the two of you alone.

you take a deep breath, straighten your dress and try walking past younghee only for her to stop you.

“i’m going to tell him,” she says, fiddling with her fingers. “you’re right. i thought about it these last two days, and i don’t want to lose him. i want to fix our marriage.”

“i don’t think there’s any fixing what you’ve done,” you say, voice so blunt that it makes younghee flinch. “but good luck, younghee.”

“i love him,” she calls out. “i really do.”

you look over your shoulder. younghee’s looking back at you.

“you wouldn’t have cheated on yeosang if that was the case,” you finally say.

you stand on the other side of the room, across from jongho. the other bridesmaids stand to your left, younghee being the last one in the line. jongho keeps pulling silly faces as everyone waits for sarang to walk in, and you have to keep puffing your cheeks out so you don’t laugh out loud. yeosang glances between you and jongho, and your gaze coincidentally lands on him while he thinks. when yeosang looks at you, you wiggle your eyebrows at him. he chuckles softly, shaking his head. you’re about to look back at jongho before you blink in surprise, watching yeosang suddenly stick his tongue out at you while looking at his nose. jongho also decides to strike, pulling another silly face that has you laughing, your hand flying up to your mouth as you try to muffle the sound behind your palm.

both of them are just so silly.

when your laughter subsides to giggles, you sigh, seeing jongho grin at you. he turns to talk to san, who looks like he’s about to pass out. your eyes trail over to yeosang, whose ears are a bright shade of pink.

no one saw, you mouth at him, giving him a thumbs up. don’t worry.

he nods, smiling at you.

the sound of a piano fills the air, and everyone turns to look at the door just as sarang walks into the room. out of the corner of your eye, you see san smile bright before his knees buck and jongho quickly reaches out to grab a hold of his arm. before you look back at sarang, you grin brightly while yeosang mirrors the look on your face.

he mouthed to you that you look pretty.

the ceremony doesn’t take long and soon you find yourself dancing with jongho after san and sarang have their first dance together as a married couple. you had to drag jongho out to the dance floor the whole time because he didn’t feel like dancing, but you know he’s lying since he didn’t put up much of a fight. and you have fun, dancing with jongho as you two giggle and twirl around, missing the way yeosang stares at the two of you from across the room while he dances with younghee a more somber tune compared to the bright and lighthearted one you dance with jongho.

“guess what younghee told me the other day when we got back home from the wedding?”

you glance at yeosang, blinking at him as you wait for him to continue. you two push past people as you walk down the street, trying to get to the cafe.

“she told me that she wants to start a family.”

“what?” your head snaps to look at him so fast that you get whiplash. rubbing your neck, you stop in the middle of the street. “she said that to you?”

yeosang nods.

“and she didn’t say anything else?” you prod, tilting your head.

he shakes his head. “no… why?”

you clear your throat. “oh, i was just…” you stop, jaw going slack as you spot younghee walking on the sidewalk across the street, heading into the bar.

in broad daylight! you think, eyebrows twitching.

“yn?” yeosang gently shakes you. “is everything okay?”

“oh, yeah!” you respond, grabbing his hand and tugging him across the street and to the bar. “follow me real quick, yeo.”

yeosang doesn’t resist, following you obediently. “yn,” he says, looking at you as you open the door to the bar. “why are we in a bar?”

“we are here,” you mumble, looking to the back corner of the bar to find younghee sitting at a table. “to look at your wife.”

“what?” he looks at you, confused. you point across the room at something, and yeosang looks over to see his wife greet— “oh.”

he doesn’t know what he feels at the moment as he stares at younghee kiss a face that yeosang could never forget even if he wanted to. and he doesn’t know what he feels as younghee smiles sweetly at the man, grabbing his hand and accidentally looking over his shoulder.

yeosang has no idea what he feels as he watches the smile fall from his wife’s lips as she stares into his emotionless eyes with her wide ones and a pale face.

kang yeosang has no idea what he feels right now at the sudden revelation that younghee has cheated on him.

again.

just as she had done seven years ago in their second year of college.

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BLURRED LINES AND LIES | yuyusuyu 2023

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yuyusuyu · 7 months

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blurred lines and lies — 09. apologies and blurred memories

warnings. crying, mentions of manipulation, mentions of food. if there's anything i should add, let me know!

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YOUR touch pulls yeosang of his daze. you frown at him and hold his hand. “i’m sorry for showing this to you,” you whisper. “but i really couldn’t stand that she told you that when she told me that she would tell you.”

“you… knew?”

“i found out three days ago,” you tell him. “i’m sorry. i should have told you, but i wanted her to tell you instead of you finding out through me… let’s go?”

he slowly nods, letting you drag him away while younghee yells out his name, begging him to stay. but he looks over at her before he leaves, noticing how she stays planted where she stands.

and then the door closes.

somehow, you two end up at yeosang’s parents’ home after a long and silent cab ride. you knock on the door and smile sheepishly as mrs kang greets you with a warm hug, gushing about how you look like such a beautiful woman before she looks at yeosang, frowning at his dazed expression.

“yeosang, dear, are you okay?”

“he’s feeling a little tired,” you say softly. “can we head over to his room, auntie?”

“of course!” she says, ushering you two in. “i’ll cut some apples up for you two, okay?”

“thank you, auntie.” you smile at her, bowing your head in gratitude. you slip your shoes off and make sure yeosang does the same before leading him over to his old room, opening the door and making sure he sits down on his bed before you close the door.

when you turn around, you rush over to him, gently tilting his head up to brush his tears away. “it’s okay, yeosang.” you whisper. “i’ve got you. let it all out, okay?”

he drops his head to your stomach and clutches the hem of your jacket, balling it in his grip. “i should have known,” he mumbles. “i should have known she was going to cheat on me with him again.”

“again?” you try pushing yeosang back by his shoulders, but he curls his arms around your waist, preventing you from doing so.

“the day of your graduation,” yeosang says, pressing his face to your stomach. “she got into an accident. when i got to the hospital, the nurse thought i was her brother and told me that she and her boyfriend were okay and just had minor injuries. when i walked into the room, she was there with him. she told me then and there that it was a mistake and that she would never do it again.”

you card your hand through his hair when his shoulders start shaking. “i’m sorry,” he heaves, gasping in between his sobs. “i’m so sorry, yn. i’m sorry.”

“why are you apologizing, yeo?” your voice cracks, your eyes becoming teary. “you did nothing wrong.”

“but i did,” he sobs. “i did do something wrong. i should have left her, but i stayed because… i-i stayed, and i let myself grow distant from you because she was insecure of our friendship and she blamed it all on us for driving her to cheat on me and…” yeosang hiccups, his hold around you tightening. “i’m so sorry. i should have left her as soon as she blamed you. fuck, i don’t know why i stayed. i’m so stupid.”

“i am the problem here,” he whispers. you feel his tears soak through the material of your shirt where your jacket is open. “and i should have left and i shouldn’t have let her get away with everything that she did.”

“yeosang, look at me.”

he shakes his head.

“yeosang,” you grab his cheeks and tilt his head up, your thumb sliding across the apples of his cheeks. “you aren’t the problem here. younghee is the problem, it isn’t you. from the sounds of it, you were manipulated by her. don’t blame yourself because it isn’t your fault. you’re an amazing person, truly. you’re so kind, a little awkward, but kind. you’re loyal, you care about the people around you, and you always try to help others out even if it means that you’ll end up getting hurt in the process or it makes you go out of your comfort zone.” you pause to laugh a little. “remember when you took me to the middle school dance? and how you were grabbing my hand because you didn’t like how crowded the gymnasium was? remember how you willingly took me there even if you didn’t want to because of how i wanted to go? don’t say that you’re the problem here, yeosang, because you aren’t.”

yeosang sniffles, slowly nodding. he rests his chin against your stomach as he continues to look up at you through his eyelashes while you run a hand through the long strands of his dark hair. suddenly, he starts chuckling, a finger coming up to wipe away at your tears that fall from your eyes. “why are you crying?” he asks, his voice deep and soft sounding. “i should be the one crying here, yn.”

you pout at him. “you know i start crying whenever i see you cry.”

yeosang starts laughing, the sound so bright that it makes you join him.

but your little bubble of tranquility soon bursts.

“mother,” younghee says, making both you and yeosang freeze at the sound of her voice. “is yeosang here?”

“oh no,” you mumble, grabbing yeosang’s hand. “let's get you out of here, yeo.”

the two of you try tiptoeing down the hallway, but younghee starts crying and calls out yeosang’s name like a mantra when she spots you two.

“yeosang,” she says, hiccupping between short breaths. “yeosang, please. yeosang, wait! don’t go… don’t leave me.”

you two stop at the door, hurriedly putting your shoes on.

“yeosang,” younghee takes a step forwards. “don’t go with her. stay with me.”

yeosang stares blankly at younghee. “no.”

“no?”

“no,” he repeats. his hand starts trembling.

you give his hand a single tug and rub circles onto his skin, trying to ground him and provide him comfort and strength. he looks back at you, nodding before you two leave in a rush, younghee’s crying growing faint the farther you two get away.

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BLURRED LINES AND LIES | yuyusuyu 2023

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yuyusuyu · 9 months

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blurred lines and lies — 03. two blurry lines

warnings. nothing! but let me know if there's anything i should add

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YOU shuffle on your feet, hands slightly shaky as you try to calm yourself down. a hand falls on your shoulder, and you smile up at jongho.

“nervous?” jongho watches as you nod, and doesn’t miss the way your hand shakes. he frowns, grabbing your hands in both of his own. “why are you nervous?”

you let out a sigh. “just… the future. no more high school, college… the norm, you know? also, what if i end up tripping while i walk up stage?”

jongho snorts, squeezing your hands. “you won’t trip,” he says. “and we’ll be going to college together, so i’ll be there for you. we’ll figure out all of this adulting together, okay?”

“okay,” you breathe out, squeezing back his hands before letting go. “thank you, jongho… really.”

the male smiles you, his gummy smile making your own lips tug upwards. a teacher tells everyone to get in line by last name, and jongho pats your back before walking to his designated spot, leaving you alone. the nerves settle back in instantaneously, but you try your hardest to push them back, focusing on the thought that this time you’ll be receiving a stupidly large bouquet of flowers from a certain someone. as you all start to file into the room on cue, your eyes search high and low in the crowd, trying to find your long-haired best friend. and you keep up the search when it’s your turn to head up on stage to receive your diploma from the principal, but as you go down the stairs and focus your gaze through the doors, you find that they never open once and you never see yeosang as you sit back down in your seat.

your family’s and jongho and his family’s cheering does nothing to alleviate the sourness settling into your body as you stare blankly ahead of you.

because yeosang wasn’t there with a stupidly large bouquet of flowers to give to you now that you’ve graduated.

but in all honesty, maybe you should have expected this from him. he wasn’t there when you were applying to colleges, he wasn’t there when you were convincing your parents to let your pursue photography and web design, and yeosang most definitely wasn’t there when you got accepted to your dream college—and his.

jongho was there in every important moment to you instead of yeosang.

you and all the other graduating students stand up as the principal dismisses everyone by wishing them good luck out in the real world. you naturally find your way to jongho, who somehow takes out a plastic rose from his pocket and hands it to you.

“i know it’s not real or anything,” jongho says, sheepishly smiling at you. “but at least this plastic rose will be there forever instead of a real rose… unless you have it in sunlight,” he adds, blinking with furrowed eyebrows. “then it’s going to melt and won’t be there forever.”

you laugh, staring at the plastic rose in your hand. “thank you, jongho. you always know what to do and say, don’t you?”

jongho shrugs, but you can tell he’s embarrassed by the way he keeps wiping the palms of his hands on his pants and by the way his neck is flushed. “i think it comes with my job of being your best friend.”

“does it now?” you tease, leaning forwards slightly.

he leans back in response. “it does, yes."

you expected yeosang to text you about the reason why he didn’t attend your graduation.

or the small celebration your family and jongho’s family planned for you and your best friend.

even his parents attended, congratulating you and jongho before yeosang’s mom went over to where your mom and jongho’s were at, and his dad beginning to talk with yours and jongho’s.

but after checking your phone for the tenth time that night in your room after managing to slip away, you realize that he’s not going to send you a message… and you think it’s for the best that he doesn’t send you anything, after all.

“you need to stop checking your phone so much,” jongho pipes up from behind you, leaning over your shoulder to peer at you’re looking at. “he still hasn’t texted?”

“no,” you sigh, pocketing your phone and turning around to look at jongho. “but it doesn’t matter anymore.”

jongho raises an eyebrow. “it doesn’t?”

“nope,” you reply. “it doesn’t matter anymore.”

the male frowns. “are you sure it doesn’t? yeosang is the guy you—”

“it doesn’t matter because i’ve decided that it doesn’t,” you huff. “also! today is about us, so i’m not going to let some guy ruin today.”

jongho snorts. “yeah, okay, yeosang is just some guy.”

frowning, you playfully try hitting his shoulder only for him to catch your hand in his. it takes you by surprise, but you immediately grow accustomed to his touch and lean your head to the side in confusion. jongho’s throat feels dry as he gulps, eyes slightly wide as he stares into your eyes, gaze flicking over every single one of your features, noticing how your eyes have little specks of gold swimming in them from the light.

your furrow your eyebrows. “is there something on my face?” you ask, raising your free hand to scratch your cheek.

slowly, jongho nods. “there’s an eyelash on your cheek. let me get it for you…”

you wait for jongho to get the eyelash, watching his every move as he carefully grazes your cheek with his finger, leaning back with a triumphant smile as he holds his finger up. you have to squint your eyes to even make out your eyelash when he brings his finger to your face, muttering, “make a wish.”

with a roll of your eyes, you close them and blow on his fingers, opening them and looking up at jongho.

“what did you wish for?”

for jongho to be in your life forever.

because yeosang clearly won’t be in yours forever like you two have always promised each other.

“nothing important,” you say, grabbing his hand and leading him back to where everyone’s at in the living room.

jongho lets you drag him away, smiling and feeling his skin turn hot by your touch, and as he watches you smile and talk to everyone, he just knows that he likes you more than a friend should.

he knows that you, however, have already given your heart to yeosang even if you don’t want to outright admit it… but that doesn’t matter. for you, he’ll wait until you’re ready to move on and love someone else that isn’t kang yeosang.

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BLURRED LINES AND LIES | yuyusuyu 2023

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yuyusuyu · 8 months

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blurred lines and lies — 07. another lie

warnings. cheating, cursing, crying. if there's anything i should add, let me know!

wc. 2.4k

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YEOSANG snorts when he sees you angrily push a button when pac-man dies on the screen.

“stupid game,” you huff, looking everywhere before gently kicking the machine.

“well,” yeosang says, both of you leaning forwards to look at the leaderboard. “at least i’m still first.”

the male is already smiling at you when you turn to look at him, frowning.

“whatever!” you declare, pushing yourself away from the machine. yeosang follows after you, laughing softly. “let's go play another game!”

“like what?” yeosang asks, his eyebrow raised. “you don't like any other game in the arcade.”

you glare at him from the corner of your eye. “whatever! let's go get something to eat, i’m starving, yeo.”

his smile grows, eyes practically twinkling when you grab your coat off from the chair next to the machine and put it on, your keys falling out from the pockets to reveal an obnoxiously bright, yellow pac-man keychain hanging on the lanyard. yeosang stays put, and when you don’t feel his presence, you turn around. “aren’t you coming?”

he nods, wordlessly grabbing his jacket and following after you. you two walk down the street, bumping shoulders like how you two used to do back when you were younger and naive, days where you only worried about getting good grades in elementary and middle school.

it doesn’t take long before the bells chime, signaling to the barista behind the counter of your arrival. you and yeosang walk up to the counter; you eye the menu, trying to decide what new latte to order, while yeosang eyes the barista in front of the two you. the barista, seonghwa, stares a little longer than one should, yeosang notes. and it clicks in his head that he’s probably interested in you.

who wouldn’t be? it’s you, after all.

seonghwa the barista doesn’t do anything like yeosang imagined he would. all he did was take your order and proceed to tell you that he’d call yeosang’s name once everything is prepared. now, you walk away and towards your usual table, sitting down.

“so… i want to hear about what you’ve been up to,” yeosang starts, glancing up at you through the hair that manages to fall into his face.

you snort, telling him that he looks like an emo, prompting a frown to tug his lips downwards. you smile. “well,” crossing your hands on your lap, you close your eyes. “i’m sure jongho already told you about what i’ve been up to a couple days ago at san’s bachelor party.”

“but i want to hear about it from you,” he stares at you and you stare back before slowly nodding.

“okay,” you sigh. “well, i majored in photography. i became the president of the photography club in my fifth semester until i graduated, landed myself an internship and now i work for that company, though i like freelancing more.” you pause, tapping on your chin. “then i graduated and i moved over there with jongho, as you already know. i usually take jongho’s club’s photos during football season. then, i end up traveling a lot when the season is over.”

“can you show me?”

“show you what, yeo?”

yeosang smiles. “your photos. everyone says that you’re good.”

you laugh, throwing your head back. “and who is everyone, exactly? jongho?”

“—and sarang.” he adds. “and san.”

playfully rolling your eyes, you take out your phone, leaning over the table as you slide it flat down towards him. “i don’t think they count. those are biased opinions because they know and love me.”

“i’d say that you should at least trust in sarang,” yeosang says, also leaning over slightly to take a look down at the screen of your phone. “you know? being an art director and all.”

you hum. “i guess…” you look at him from the corner of your eye, finding that he’s already looking at you as if he’s waiting for something. “oh fine,” you groan, waving him over. “come here.”

grinning, yeosang walks over to you and places a hand on the table, leaning over you as you grab your phone from where you slid it over to him. he peers down at the device in your hand. you busy yourself with scrolling through your folders in your camera roll, trying to ignore the close proximity. “here it is,” you mumble, handing him your phone. he takes it away from you, rounding the table to sit back in his seat as he stares down at the screen, completely silent.

he looks up at you. “you took all of these?”

you feel small as you nod, averting your gaze. “i did, yes.”

“yn, these are amazing. these are the most beautiful pictures i’ve ever seen.”

“oh, stop.” you mumble.

“you have a lot of pictures of jongho,” yeosang hums, handing your phone back to you. “barely any of you, though.”

“because i’m the photographer here,” you snort, leaning forwards and wiggling your eyebrows at him. “enough about me! what did you do in these past years? did you think about me, hm?”

“of course i thought about you,” yeosang says, his eyes focused on the table between you two. “i always thought about you.”

“you… did?” you ask, eyes wide.

“i did,” he admits, nodding slowly. “everything reminded me of you—reminds me of you. the first year was horrible, honestly. it didn’t feel real.”

“what didn’t feel real?”

“you not being there.” yeosang finally looks up from the table, a sad smile on his lips. “it wasn’t real. it didn’t feel like it was. i mean, i grew up with you and i was always with you for the entirety of my life. the lack of your presence was too big, too clear for me. but younghee does what she’s best and i stopped thinking about you.”

the last part comes out in a hushed whisper, and it reminds you of something you’ve always wanted to know. you sigh and clasp your hands together, placing them on top of the table. “yeosang.”

he hums in response.

“why didn’t you go to my graduation? the high school one.”

“i was getting ready to leave when i got a call from younghee,” he starts, wincing at the memory. “i was at the bus stop when i got her call. she got into an accident and i left to go see her. i didn’t tell you because younghee didn’t want me to.”

“would you leave me for her again?” the words leave your lips before you can even register what it is that you exactly just said. you stare at yeosang, horrified. “forget what i just said—”

“no.”

you let out a choked gasp. you were expecting for him to say yes because you know him, he’d do anything to be there for a loved one and younghee is his loved one. you were okay with him saying yes because you like to think that you’re over this.

are you over this?

“i should have,” yeosang pauses, cursing afterwards. “sorry, i’m just… trying to find the words.”

“yeosang—”

“no, let me finish. please.” he looks at you, watching you nod as you settle down, waiting for him to continue. “i should have tried harder to be there, to stay in your life because…”

“because…?” your mouth runs dry at his next words.

“because it was always going to be us,” yeosang breathes out. “you and i. yn and yeosang, yeosang and yn. us against the world. you meant the world to me; well, you still mean the world to me. even though i left, even though i dated and married younghee and worried and loved her, i still thought about you. i thought we were going to stay the same, that our friendship would be the same. but shit, i let it go and i watched us drift apart. i let myself stop talking to you, and i shouldn’t have. i shouldn’t have listened to younghee when she said that you were too busy for me and—”

“what?” you frown, leaning forwards. “yeosang, you knew that i was never going to be too busy for you. i was always going to find the time for you. you know that.”

your next words have yeosang whipping his head towards you, tears of frustration falling from them as your face softens.

“because it was always going to be us against the world.”

“shit,” he sniffles, more tears falling down his cheeks while you stand up and lean over the table, your thumbs gently wiping the tears away. “i can’t undo what’s been done,” yeosang says. “but i don’t want to let go again and watch you walk away… if you let me back in, that is. i understand if you don’t want me in your life again—”

“yeosang.”

he stops talking, watching as you smile at him and cradle his face. “it’s us against the world, okay? always.”

“us against the world,” he repeats, grinning.

“hey, but i need you and jongho to get along, okay?” you huff, sitting back down in your seat. the barista from before calls out yeosang’s name. he shoots you a look of confusion before getting up, coming back with what you two had ordered minutes ago.

“why do you say that?” yeosang asks, setting down your drink in front of you.

“don’t pretend i haven’t seen you give him dirty looks whenever he’s around,” you point an accusing finger at him. “you did the same back then whenever i even mentioned his name!”

“right,” he laughs, holding his arms up in the air. “i’ll get along with him, don’t worry.”

you spend the rest of the day talking with yeosang, laughing about things that have happened in the time you two were apart. it’s then that you find out about his problems with younghee.

“yeosang,” you groan. “that’s not how marriage works. both of you have to put in the same amount of effort, you shouldn’t have been the only one taking care of bills for that long, and you should have let yourself have some time to relax! younghee should have been helping you instead of playing around with her friends for so long.”

“it doesn’t matter now,” he sighs, taking a sip of his coffee. “it’s in the past, and she works now. but…”

“but?” you raise your brows at him. “there’s more?”

yeosang takes his beanie off to ruffle a hand through his hair. “she just… i told her a month ago that i think we should try and have a family since we’re stable enough,” he says. “but she immediately started acting weird, she got all cold and distant. we’ve been fighting since then. i’ve dropped the subject now. if she doesn’t want to have a kid, that’s fine with me. we could always adopt, but she still says no. her reasoning for not wanting a family is because i’m not always around.”

“geez, i wonder why,” you mumble.

“hey, i heard that.” yeosang narrows his eyes at you. “i said it’s in the past now, and that she helps with bills now, too.”

“sorry sorry,” you apologize. “but i’m a little confused. you said earlier that you’re a field technician?”

he nods. “i am. i think she’s still hurt that i was barely home at the beginning of our marriage.”

“i wonder why.” you roll your eyes. “listen, you have to sit down and have a proper talk with her about this.”

“i will. after the bachelorette party, she’s been in a pretty good mood. that’s a good sign, right?” he sighs, and looks out the window. “it’s dark now. do you need a ride back to the hotel, or is jongho picking you up?”

you look out the window as well, eyes narrowing at the sight of younghee disappearing into the bar across the street once again. “jjongs is going to pick me up,” you say, hurriedly grabbing your belongings. “i’ll talk to you later, yeo. drive safely!” with that, you rush out the doors of the cafe, following after younghee.

you squint your eyes once you’re inside the bar, looking everywhere for younghee. you spot her near a table in the far back, so you inch closer. you don’t know what compels you to take your phone out and open up your camera, but you gasp in shock and take a picture when a guy comes up to her and kisses her. she smiles sweetly at him, letting herself get dragged to a more private space. you blink repeatedly, gulping when you turn your attention back to your phone, noticing that instead of taking a picture you took a video of the whole thing. you stop recording and find the video in your camera roll, playing it and taking note of how younghee’s face, as well as the man’s, are visible. you throw your phone into the pocket of your coat and stand off to the side of the door, leaning against it.

it takes a while, but you’re thankful you decided to be patient enough to wait for younghee because you see her and the guy walking in your direction. he kisses her once before he leaves the building. you almost scoff out loud when younghee finally notices you and stares at you in horror.

“yn!” she says. “i didn’t know you liked to drink.”

“i don’t,” you spit out. “i didn’t know that you like to cheat on yeosang.”

her face pales and she walks forwards, gripping your hands in her shaking ones. “don’t tell him. please, don’t tell him.”

you laugh, snatching your hands out from her grip. “are you insane?” you ask. “do you actually think i’d listen to you?”

“you don’t understand,” she cries, reaching out for you. you take a step back. “i can’t lose him, yn!”

“you’re crazy.” you take a step forward. she backs up until she no longer can, and you press your finger to her shoulder. “you’re going to tell yeosang, or i will.”

you turn around to exit the bar, but freeze.

“do you think he’ll listen to you?” younghee calls out, chuckling. “i’ve been with him for eight years now. i can make him stop talking to you just like how i did before.”

you whip around, smiling widely at her. she frowns and furrows her eyebrows at you. “do you want to know what your husband just told me?” you flutter your eyelashes at her innocently. “he told me that he would pick me over you… so do you really want to try your luck out with me? do you really think he’d listen to you?”

she stays quiet, and you smile triumphantly at her.

“tell him, younghee.” you tell her, opening the door to the bar. “or i will. and i hope you know that you’ve already lost yeosang with this.”

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BLURRED LINES AND LIES | yuyusuyu 2023

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yuyusuyu · 7 months

Text

blurred lines and lies — 10. blurred lines and the truth

warnings. crying, mentions of manipulation, mentions of food. if there's anything i should add, let me know!

wc. 1.5k

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IT’S been five days since then.

you decided that yeosang can stay with you in your hotel room for the time being, not wanting him to be around younghee at all. you didn't tell jongho about this, knowing that he would be angry with your decision.

he's already angry enough with the fact that you got yourself involved in yeosang’s marriage. you two got into an argument over it, and just thinking about it makes your head hurt.

‘living’ with yeosang isn't bad. in all honesty, it feels like you're having a sleepover with him like you used to back in your youth, just a very long one at that. it's made you realize that yeosang has changed quite a bit; well, not that you didn't already know that but it makes you notice things that he's never done before and you know it's a result from younghee.

1. yeosang knows how to cook. you found this out when you woke up early one morning and found him in the kitchen making breakfast. he's a very good one.

2. yeosang doesn't like not having anything to do. this, he told you himself. you were watching a movie with him in the late hours of the night, deciding that a movie marathon would be a nice way to unwind, but instead of watching the movie you two ended up talking. he talked about how he doesn't know what to do with himself if he has nothing to do. it makes him feel awkward, relaxing and being alone makes him feel weird. it made you sad, knowing that he used to value his time alone to recharge. stupid younghee.

3. yeosang still doesn't like skin ship, but he likes to initiate it. you found this out whenever he'd absentmindedly hold your hand at times or whenever you were laying down on the couch and he would lift your legs up to sit and then place them on his lap, one of fingers drumming against them.

4. he's a gym rat. you had an inkling that he's one but your theory was confirmed when he'd come back from work almost three hours later looking very sweaty. you also didn't realize how muscular his arms actually were until he came out of the shower one day, drying his hair with a towel.

and 5. he's too self-sacrificing. you noticed this whenever he'd talk about his marriage to you, and you told him he had to work on that. he said would, and you hope he does.

today is your second to last day in korea. while trying to be there for yeosang, you've also been trying to spend time with your parents. you visit them whenever yeosang works, but a three hour stay usually takes a turn and you leave almost at nine p.m. why? because of younghee. the first time you visited your parents, you were cornered by younghee as soon as you were leaving. she begged and begged for you to tell her where yeosang was, and you threatened to call the police on her. it made her back down and leave you alone, but she was always camping outside of the kang apartment. it made you wonder about how she has all that free time to just wait hours on end for someone that wouldn't come.

you tiredly swipe the hotel key on the lock, yawning and hands ready to twist the doorknob when you hear someone clear their throat.

“yn.”

turning around, you smile at jongho. he raises a brow at your tired expression and follows you inside your hotel room when you open the door and hold it open for him. you're barely reaching the kitchen after taking your shoes off and closing the door when jongho speaks again.

“i'm worried about you.”

you glance at jongho. “why? i don't think there's anything to worry about.”

“yn,” he says, ruffling his hair. “you're always coming back late from visiting auntie and uncle, and we haven't been spending time together and i know this is all because you're helping yeosang out.”

“jongho,” you sigh, turning around to look at him. he's frowning at you, and you frown back at him. “we already talked about this, and i don't want to argue with you again. if i want to help him, then i'll help him. he's my friend. it really doesn't concern you, so please just drop this already.”

“what do you mean this doesn't concern me?” he asks, eyebrows furrowed. “this is about you so it does concern me, actually.”

“well, everything is fine so there's nothing to worry about.” you pause, fiddling with your fingers now. “i… jongho i think i'm going to stay here for longer.”

jongho’s eyes widen. “what?”

“maybe a month or two,” you mumble. “i think i'll pick up some commissions here, and—”

“this is because of yeosang, isn't it?” jongho scoffs and rolls his eyes, crossing his arms over his chest. “see, this is why i'm worried! i'm worried you're going to go back to how things were before and you ending up hurt again because of him. yn, you've become such a wonderful person without yeosang in your life, and you're starting to lose yourself to him again. i really don't want to see you make your life revolve around someone that abandoned you and you get hurt one more time.”

“you're kidding, right?” you look at him bewildered, but you're only met with silence. “jongho, my life does not revolve around yeosang. are you hearing yourself right now? i'm just trying to help yeosang out, and i know you'd be doing the same if i was in yeosang’s shoes.”

“yeosang can just ask someone else,” he huffs, reaching out to grab your hand. “it doesn't have to be you. he can ask san for help or something.”

“don't be ridiculous, jongho.” you purse your lips into a straight line and snatch your hand out of his. “san is on his honeymoon and yeo doesn't really talk to others anymore because he spent too much time trying to make ends meet because of younghee.”

“that's his own fault,” jongho snaps. “and he's a grown man! he doesn't need you to look after him!”

“i know that!” you bite back, slowly getting frustrated. “but i want to be there for him, jongho.”

the door to the bathroom creaks opens and yeosang walks out. he looks between you and jongho, blinking when your heads snap to look at him.

“uh… hi?” he says, waving awkwardly. “is jongho staying for dinner? i'm, uh, making pasta… do you like pasta?”

jongho ignores yeosang’s question and turns his attention back on you, laughing in shock. “he's staying with you? and you didn't tell me?”

“because you were going to react like this!” you cry out, running a hand through your hair.

“see, this is exactly what i'm talking about!” jongho glowers at you. “you're going back to the way that you were.”

“jongho, i am not! can you please just—”

“no,” he interrupts. “listen to me, yn. you're going to end up falling in love with him again, and you're going to get hurt the second yeosang finds someone else to love that isn't you and you're going to break just like how you did on his wedding night.” jongho turns towards yeosang, fuming. “where were you when she was struggling? where were when she was happy that she accomplished something? you. weren't. there. i was.”

jongho pauses and looks back at you, grabbing your hand gently in his. “i just… i don't want to see you getting hurt again. i just want what's best for you, yn. always. and i think that… yeosang isn't. he's bad for you.”

you stare at jongho with wide eyes, feeling your heart drop to the ground as silence blankets the whole room. you can't bring yourself to speak, heartbeat drumming loudly in your ears.

“you… you loved me?” yeosang blinks at you. “you were in love with me?”

you slowly turn to look at yeosang. he looks shocked as he remains frozen in place, the towel he held in his hand falling to the floor. you swallow the lump in your throat and look down. “it was in the past,” you whisper, “it doesn't matter now, yeo.”

your hands start shaking. you want to cry and run away, feeling bare and exposed.

“why didn't you tell me?” yeosang takes another step forwards, but you take a step away from him and jongho, tears welling up in your eyes and threatening to spill.

“because you were too busy with your ex wife to even notice that your best friend was in love with you and hurting every damn time you didn't come when she needed you.” jongho glares at yeosang, his tone unforgiving. he takes a deep breath, reaching out for you again. you let him grab your hand and run his thumb across your knuckles. “please don't stay here,” he says, his voice soft and low. “come back to london with me… come back home with me.”

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BLURRED LINES AND LIES | yuyusuyu 2023

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yuyusuyu · 8 months

Text

blurred lines and lies — 06. the blurred line

warnings. alcohol consumption, mentions of feeling sick (throwing up but nothing happens), jealousy. if there's anything i should add, let me know!

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SARANG looks at you, eyes gleaming in mischief as she swirls her wine glass, lips tugged upwards in a teasing smile. “so,” she drawls. “yn, my adorable friend.”

“yes?” you sing, grinning as you take a sip from your glass, the wine going down your throat smoothly. you make a mental note to ask san later about where he got this wine because it is so good, and it would be a good one to drink with jongho on one of your lazy nights in his apartment.

“how are things going with jongho?”

at the mention of your best friend’s name, you brighten up and beam at the bride. “perfect, as always!” your grin softens and you look down at the contents of your wine glass, tilting it back and forth and watching the red wine swish around. “i’m thankful for him. i really, really, really am glad that i was able to meet and befriend him.” pausing, you chuckle and shake your head, taking another sip of wine before continuing. “he’s helped me become a better person and convinced me to pursue my dreams. he helped convince my parents to let me pursue photography and in letting me go abroad.”

sarang hums. “san told me about that.”

you nod. “jongho is such an amazing person. i’ve always felt comfortable around him. he’s like my haven no matter where we go. i’m horrible at taking care of myself and he knows that, so he always travels with me when football season is over.”

“oh, your photos in the new edition were marvelous,” sarang pipes up, grinning. “you always outdo yourself every time, yn.”

“thank you.” you laugh, feeling giddy after receiving the compliment. “jjongs says the same.”

“i know,” sarang says.

your tone softens at your next words as you throw your head back, eyes closed. “i honestly wouldn’t have made it here without jongho. he’s so important to me… he’s like a puzzle piece in my life that no matter what happens or what shape my life becomes, even if his puzzle piece can’t fit, i’ll just force it in and super glue him to the pieces of my life because… i can’t see a future where he’s not in it. no matter what, even if i’m married and old, jongho will always be there. he’s been there for me. always.”

“actually, my husband was always there for you.” younghee says, glancing at you. “but i guess you’re right since he hasn’t been there in… recent times.”

you ignore younghee’s words as does sarang. the bride giggles. “it sounds like you’re in love with jongho, yn.”

“what?” you screech, immediately sitting back up to face your friend. you groan, whiplash hitting you from how fast you whipped your head to look at sarang. as you cradle your head, younghee smiles.

“looks like you finally found another best friend besides yeosang.” younghee closes her eyes. “i’m happy for you.”

you huff in amusement, smiling at her and leaning back into your chair. “well, yeosang and i decided to rekindle our friendship.” you open an eye to peek at younghee, almost laughing at her expression. “it honestly feels like the pause we put on it was never there to begin with.”

younghee stares at you, shocked. “you guys… what?”

“so,” says san, smirking as he folds his arms over his chest and leans back into the couch. “how has yn been?”

out of instinct, yeosang opens his mouth to reply but gets beaten to it by jongho.

“she’s doing great, actually.” jongho says, taking a shot and placing the small glass cup on the table. “she’s thriving and she made a name for herself in the industry, and i couldn’t be prouder of her. she deserves all of this and more.” he scrunches his nose as he grabs the bottle of tequila and pours himself another shot. “we’re happy to be back for a bit before going back.”

“a bit?” yeosang asks, leaning forwards in his seat. “before going back?”

jongho nods, drowning his shot glass before pushing it away, stretching his arms over his heads. san laughs at the confused expression on yeosang’s face. “you know that yn and jongho went abroad for college, right?”

yeosang slowly nods.

“and you know about how they transferred over after a semester, right?”

actually, he didn’t know that, but he nods once more.

“well,” san says. “they liked it so much over in london that they moved there after graduating. this is the first time they’ve visited since moving there four years ago.”

jongho hums. “yup,” he says. “we’ll be going back a week after the wedding.”

“oh.”

yeosang feels sick to his stomach. he feels like he just got his heart ripped out and stomped on. you moved to london, permanently, and this is the first time you’ve visited in four years after you moved there.

with jongho.

the information makes him dizzy. he just got you back, and he doesn’t want to lose you. the thought of losing you once more makes his heart ache in pain, makes it bleed and clench in fear of going through the pain of watching you leave him a second time.

he can’t lose you.

he can’t lose a piece of himself once more.

not again.

not ever.

and not to jongho.

“so, when are you planning on confessing to her, hm?” san raises a brow at his cousin.

yeosang immediately snaps out of his head, turning his head to look at jongho with narrowed eyes. it doesn’t matter if he hasn’t talked to you in four years, because after all this time, he just wants what’s best for you.

he always will.

jongho smiles. “i hope to make my move when we return to london,” he says.

the long-haired male slumps down in his seat and stares up at the ceiling, blinking.

return to london.

yeosang hopes you don’t go back.

because he really can’t bear to lose you again. and to jongho… again.

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BLURRED LINES AND LIES | yuyusuyu 2023

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yuyusuyu · 8 months

Text

blurred lines and lies — 05. a non existent line between old friends

warnings. mentions of food (coffee), wanting to start a family. if there's anything i should add, let me know!

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YOU have absolutely no idea how this all unfolded. did the world think of you as a joke? did it need a laugh, some shits and giggles, for it to have made the impossible happen today?

why did the world decide to reunite you with yeosang after four years of no contact with him? and why the hell are you sitting in the back of his car with jongho holding your hand, running the pad of this thumb across your knuckles as he talks to yeosang?

what the actual hell is happening right now?

yeosang glances at you through the rearview mirror before looking back at the road in front of him. “san didn’t mention where i had to drop you guys off at… are you staying with your parents?”

the sound of yeosang’s voice pulls you out from your thoughts long enough to answer him. “oh, we’re actually staying at a hotel… the one near the wedding venue. we’ll stop by there first before visiting our parents.”

the male hums. “alright. i’ll take you guys there then.”

your mind instantly wanders off, and jongho notices the dazed look on your features, almost laughing at the sight out of pure adoration.

“so,” yeosang pipes. jongho looks away from you and into the mirror, catching yeosang looking away just in time. “what have you guys been up to in these four years?”

jongho shrugs, a small smile tugging his lips upwards. “not much honestly. just the usual.”

“just the usual?” yeosang echoes.

“yeah,” he continues, “we did a study abroad program in london, loved it there and transferred over, graduated. the usual.”

an awkward silence fills the car, suffocating yeosang. he clears his throat, earning jongho’s attention once more. “so… what did you guys do after graduating?”

jongho hums, thinking, before answering slowly. “well, i signed a contract and starting playing for a club in london. it’s fun,” he pauses, grinning while he rests his head against yours all the while yeosang watches through the rearview mirror when he stops the car at a red light. “especially when yn’s there.”

before yeosang can ask what he means by that, jongho cuts him off. “she’s usually commissioned to take the club’s pictures throughout the entirety of the season. yn’s practically our team’s photographer at this point. and then when the season is over, she’s usually commissioned by others and travels around to take pictures and i go with her to keep her company. she doesn’t really like being alone, you know. even if she’s doing something she loves.” he then huffs. “she has a nasty habit of drinking too much coffee if i’m not around to stop her. coffee has practically replaced the blood in her veins.”

“coffee?” you pipe up, blinking and dropping your eyes to look at your empty latte. “jjong, we should get more coffee before we visit our parents.” you shake the container, sad at how you drank your coffee too quickly while lost in your head.

jongho scoffs, snatching the empty cup away from your hands, eliciting a whine as you wrestle to get it back. “you,” he holds it up in the air, capturing both of your hands in his free one and pinning it down on his lap, smiling triumphantly as you slump down in defeat. “are not drinking any more coffee today.”

while you and jongho fall into harmless banter, going back and forth on why you should and shouldn’t drink coffee, yeosang steps on the gas pedal when the light turns green.

you’ve changed so much. he’d be a fool to not notice.

and he’s stayed the same.

he’s still your kang yeosang from back then, while you weren’t his yn from before.

the realization leaves a bitter taste in his mouth and his heart feeling heavy.

yeosang sighs, running a hand through his hair. “younghee, i don’t understand why you keep trying to push me away. am i doing something wrong?”

younghee looks at him from across the table, eyes narrowed and her lips turned down into a nasty frown. “what’s wrong is that you keep insisting on starting a family. yeosang, we aren’t even financially stable to have a family!”

yeosang raises a brow and gestures around them with a raised hand. “not financially stable to support a family, you say… then what do you call all of this?” he drags his gaze around their apartment, everything showing how they’re well above being financially stable. “younghee, just say you don’t want a kid. i’m not going to get hurt.”

instead of saying anything, the short haired woman silently fumes in her seat, abruptly standing up and pushing her plate away from her. “i’m not hungry anymore,” she mumbles, shuffling around the place to gather her belongings. yeosang watches as she does.

“where are you going?” he finally says.

younghee doesn’t look at him, busying herself with putting her shoes on and grabbing her coat and purse from the hanger next to the door. “out,” she replies, voice quiet. “i’ll be heading down to work on some projects.”

“younghee, it’s late. you shouldn’t be going out at this time. how about you work on your projects from home this time, hm?”

“no,” she snaps. “i’ll be back later.”

“younghee—”

the sound of the front door being slammed shut fills the air. yeosang blinks a couple of times before he slumps down in his seat, eyes boring into the wall in front of him.

younghee has been so distant lately, and yeosang doesn’t really know what else to do to fix whatever’s happening between them.

his phone buzzes in the pocket of his slacks. he assumes it’s an email from his supervisor at the company, so he fishes it out, ready to check his notifications when he looks at the phone icon instead and before he can process what he’s doing, he taps on it, fingers already tapping the numbers to your number. yeosang starts bouncing his leg when his phone starts ringing, his stomach feeling queasy. maybe he should hang up; after all, he’s not even sure if you still have the same phone number anymore and—

“hello?”

“oh, wait. wait, shit, i—shit,” yeosang starts to ramble, his hands suddenly feeling clammy. “i didn’t think you were still using this phone number—”

“i’m not.” your voice is soft and is almost drowned out by the sound of yeosang’s beating heart. “my mom gave me my old phone back,” you sigh. “told me that my dad still pays for its line of service. it just turned on after i put it to charge since it was dead and all… i didn’t expect this.”

“i didn’t mean to,” he says, gulping. “i just found myself typing it in and—”

you hum, and yeosang can hear you shuffle on the other line. “is something wrong, yeo? you sound off.”

yeo.

he pauses for a moment, thinking back to what just happened with younghee. “i just—can we meet up? at the coffee place near the arcade to catch up?” yeosang almost adds a please to the end, but stops when he hears you agree, a smile breaking out on his face.

“how does tomorrow afternoon sound?”

you play with the ends of your sleeves, absentmindedly looking outside the window. people walk the streets, some in a hurry while others take their time; however, there’s someone that captures your attention, making you lean forwards in your seat. younghee hurries down on the other street, the one across where the cafe is at, and disappears into a building. you don’t have time to think about it when yeosang walks by the window, stopping when he notices you from the corner of his eye. he turns around, and you two just stare at each other before he flushes in embarrassment and hurries inside.

“hi,” is the first thing he says to you when he approaches the table you’re sat at. yeosang looks at the chair opposite to yours. “may i…?”

“oh, yeah, go ahead.” you nod, gesturing towards the chair. yeosang mumbles a thanks as he takes off his coat and hangs it on the back of the chair, sitting in it.

he chuckles, brushing back a few strands of his hair away from his face and readjusts the beanie on his head. “isn’t this where we used to sit?”

you look down at the table, almost laughing. “it is, isn’t it?”

he points at what you’re looking at: a stick figure you carved onto it, saying it was him, when you were in middle school. you know he’s about to say something with the way his shoulders shake, so you scoff loudly and point at the badly carved stick figure on his side of the table. “don’t even start, kang yeosang.” you huff. “that stick figure you did is the worst between the two of us.”

it is. it’s a circle, a triangle with odd lines, and two squiggly lines at the bottom of the triangle. it was horrible—in a good way. it always makes you laugh.

yeosang’s eyes smile along with his lips, a content sigh leaving him. “wow, this brings back memories.”

“it sure does,” you hum, your eyes trailing away from the male in front of you and out the window once again, your gaze falling on the arcade.

yeosang looks over at the arcade as well, a bittersweet taste settling on his tongue. “i haven’t gone back to the arcade since…”

“—before your wedding.”

“—my graduation.”

you rip your gaze away from the arcade, your attention landing on your hands that you have folded on your lap. “well, it’s been quite some time for both of us then, hasn’t it?”

“i guess so,” yeosang mumbles, an awkward silence falling on both of you like an unwelcome blanket during a summer night.

silence with you shouldn’t be awkward. nothing with you should ever be awkward.

“so,” he says, watching as you take a peek up at him. “you and jongho. how long have you been dating?”

the question catches you off guard, yeosang can tell by the way your eyes widen and how you start rubbing your wrists. he raises a brow, “you two are dating, right?”

“i, uh,” you gulp, looking away from him.

there’s no point in lying to yeosang.

you know that he can still read you like an open book.

because you’re the same you, but yeosang isn’t the one you knew back then. he stopped being so a long time ago.

“no,” you finally say, sighing. “we aren’t dating. i think jongho did that because he saw how i reacted to seeing you. wow,” laughing softly, you continue in a smaller voice, almost as if you don’t want him to hear your next words. “jongho really is my best friend, huh?”

at this, yeosang frowns. “what about me?” his mind tells him to stop, but he doesn’t. “aren’t i your best friend?”

“no.”

yeosang stares at you, wide-eyed.

“gosh, yeosang,” you ruffle your hair out of frustration. “we haven’t talked in four years. how do you expect me to call you my best friend when we’re different people now? when we haven’t been there for each other?”

“i’m still the same kang yeosang you know.” his response is instant.

now it’s you looking at him, wide-eyed. “what?”

“let me be your best friend again.” yeosang stretches his hand out across the table, flipping it so his palm faces the roof. “let’s be best friends again, yn… please.”

you stare at his hand, and time seems to tick by slowly. yeosang starts regretting his words when you don’t move or do anything. he’s about to bring his hand back to his side when you finally place your hand in his.

“okay,” you breathe out. “let’s be best friends again.”

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BLURRED LINES AND LIES | yuyusuyu 2023

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yuyusuyu · 7 months

Text

blurred lines and lies — choi jongho, i think i should be honest with myself and you, too

warnings. SUGGESTIVE CONTENT (no smut! but it is. suggestive), pet names, kissing. if there's anything i should add, let me know!

wc. 2.1 k

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JONGHO watches as you turn away from him after bidding him a good night and making sure the pillow is between the two of you. he grins, settling back into his pillow and stares up at the ceiling until his eyelids feel heavy and close. he doesn’t understand why you’re still so adamant with putting a pillow between you two whenever he stayed over the night at your place. the pillow always ends up being flung somewhere in the room and you always end up being in his arms, your head tucked away under his chin.

(and that’s exactly how you two find yourselves when you wake up the next morning. it’s been like this for the past year—well, not the entirety of it. this started almost five months ago.)

and you’re still so shy with him, so jumpy.

but as he watches you continuously look over your shoulder to peer at him only to avert your gaze just as quickly, jongho decides that he can continue to wait for you to be honest to yourself. he’s waited for seven years now and a little more time doesn’t hurt.

he’s in it for the long ride, the one that ends up with you and him and a pair of rings and maybe a kid or two running around, one that lasts a lifetime and an eternity.

lo and behold, true to his word, jongho wakes up to his arms around you and your head tucked securely into his neck this time around. he flushes when he feels your breath hit his skin, but he soon relaxes and carefully places a quick kiss to the crown of your head, lips lingering. “you’re so cute.”

you begin to stir, and he leans back, grinning, as you start to tiredly blink your eyes at him. blinking and blinking until you squint at him, eyes slowly widening in a comedic manner that makes jongho laugh when you practically leap out of the bed.

“i—uh—hey, will you look at that?” you stutter, laughing and pointing up at the roof. jongho hums and indulges you just as he’s been doing the past couple of months, looking up at the roof.

“i don’t see anything~”

but the sound of the bedroom door swinging open is more than enough for him to know that you’re running away from him and into the bathroom out by the living room. by the time jongho walks into the kitchen after freshening up and going about his morning routine, he sees you staring intently into the refrigerator.

“what do you want to eat?” you mumble. “there’s eggs, but we ate eggs yesterday… or do you want to go—”

honestly, jongho knows he should be paying attention to what you’re saying. he really should be, but you just look so cute. your hair is messy, your shirt is very loose around your shoulders and—wait a damn moment. he narrows his eyes slightly, trying to figure out where he’s seen that shirt, until… “are you wearing my shirt?”

“oh! i didn’t mean to, it was just—”

he watches you again, his dark eyes wide. you wave your arms around as you try to explain yourself, avoiding his gaze and finding that the living room window is so much more interesting. jongho wants to take a step forwards and yank you into him, grab your cheeks and kiss you breathless until your knees buck from the intensity and you fall into him, he wants to nip away at your neck and mark you as his own and hear what pretty sounds you could make, ones that only he would be privy to and—he clears his throat and shoves his hands into the pockets of his sweats. “it’s okay,” he says, his voice eerily calm that it takes him by surprise. “i don’t mind if you wear my clothes. it just took me by surprise, that’s all.”

“you’re,” you trail off, looking into his eyes carefully. “you’re not mad?”

he lets out a breathy chuckle, taking a step forwards and ruffling your hair slightly, his hand sliding down and his fingers grazing your cheek before he pulls away, smiling softly. with a shake of his head, he replies, “no. i could never be mad at you.”

you scoff and roll your eyes. “think again, jjongs. you were so mad at me last year for trying to be a good friend to yeosang.”

jongho groans. “that’s because he’s a grown man and can take care of himself.”

“uh-huh,” you nod, “and you’re a grown man that can sleep in his own apartment and in his own bed.”

jongho opens his mouth but no words come out. you giggle, patting his back while you move past him. “well, there’s no need to be mad now. we’re just friends, yeosang and i. he’s not… you. well, what you are to me.”

at this, he perks up. jongho twists around to face you, but you’re already disappearing into your room, yelling, “i’m going to get dressed, and so should you! we’re going out to eat!”

he lets out a shaky breath, hunching over the nearest surface which happens to be the fridge.

you are so going to be the death of him one of these days.

and you really are going to be the death of him.

after your ‘kind of’ confession, you’ve been so touchy. lingering touches and gazes, bright smiles and pretty eyes. it’s like you’re trying to tell him that you love him.

he knows you do, but jongho wants to hear you say those three words.

maybe today is the day you’ll do just that. but who knows? you’ve backed out a lot of timss from telling him how you feel before. so… maybe today might also not be the day you do just that.

you’ve spent the whole day out. what was meant to be a quick breakfast run turned into you dragging jongho across the city, laughing and giggling and smiling at him as you pulled him from place to place. he doesn’t have the heart to say no to you, so the brunette obediently follows you around with no complaint. however, as the sun starts to set, your endless energy finally ends.

“oh,” you sigh. “let’s rest here for a bit… is that okay with you?”

jongho hums. “i’m okay with whatever you want, you know that.” with a hand on your back, he guides you to the bench that’s not too far from the two of you. you both sit down, letting silence blanket you two, accompanied by the autumn breeze. when you sneeze, jongho begins to unwrap the scarf around his neck.

you push his hand away, shaking your head. “no, that’s yours. what if you get sick, anyways?”

laughing, he replies, “i’d rather get sick than you.” pushing your hands away, jongho secures the scarf around your neck. “warm?”

you stare at him instead of replying, your hands grabbing onto his arms. the brunette raises an eyebrow, waiting for you to say something.

“i, um,” you start, “i… you’ve been waiting for a long time, haven’t you?”

jongho slowly nods. “i have… but i’m a patient man. i’ll wait until you’re ready.”

“jongho, i should’ve been honest from the start,” your voice drops down to whisper. “i should’ve just told you from the start.”

“you weren’t ready,” his tone matches your own. jongho rubs your shoulders. “it’s fine. you don’t have to force yourself—”

“jongho, i love you.”

the sky is dark now, but the lamp post illuminates you two. with a bright smile, jongho asks you to repeat yourself.

“i love you.”

“again,” he says, resting his forehead against yours. “again, please.”

“you… you say it back first!” you huff. “and maybe i’ll say it again—”

“i love you,” jongho sings, laughing quietly. “i have since high school.”

“and you didn’t say anything?” you hiss, pulling away and hitting his shoulder.

jongho laughs louder now. “and burden you with my feelings while you were still in love with yeosang? no thank you.” he opens his arms, and you begrudgingly—more like happily, if he’s being honest—hug him. “you know what you should do to make it up to me?”

“what?” you mumble.

“give me a kiss and all is forgiven.”

“you’re asking me for a kiss when you haven’t even taken me out on a date?” you snort, pulling back. “you’re unbelievable, choi jongho.”

“no, you’re the unbelievable one,” he says, shaking his head. “you’ve been letting me sleep with you when i wasn’t even your boyfriend yet.”

“...fair enough.”

playfully groaning, you peck his lips and pull back, squealing in surprise when jongho chases after you, pressing his lips against you.

jongho shivers, though he’s not sure if it’s from the cold or if it’s from you and how hot your fingers feel when they shakily cup his cheeks, returning the fervor he kisses you with.

“and that’s how i got your mom to fall in love with me.” the ten year old boy in front of him, jinho, furrows his eyebrows. jongho looks at his son, confused. “what’s wrong, jinho?”

“mom used to like uncle yeosang?”

“that was not the point of my story, jinho,” sighs jongho. “now, it’s time for you to go to bed before mom gets mad—”

“at you,” the boy snorts, quickly apologizing when he sees his dad look at him with an expressionless face.

jongho smiles, “uh-huh, that’s what i thought.” pinching his nose, jongho gets up from jinho's bed and turns off the lamp beside him. “goodnight, jinho.”

“goodnight, dad… oh, can you tell uncle yeosang to come in here before i go to sleep? it’s important.”

nodding and closing the door after him, jongho walks into the living room and finds you reading a book on the couch. you happily hum as jongho dips down to kiss your temple before rounding the couch and sitting next to you, his arm already thrown around you.

“i think we should have a daughter.”

you choke on air, snapping your head to look at him. “what?”

“i just told your son about our love story and all he said was, ‘mom used to have a crush on uncle yeosang?’ are you kidding me? now my own son thinks about yeosang first?” jongho huffs, pouting afterwards.

you look away from him with your eyes squeezed shut, but your shaking shoulders give you away.

“are you laughing at me right now, mrs choi?”

“no—”

“so i was only able to find red wine from your cabinet thingy, jongho,” yeosang looks up from the bottle of wine and grimaces, turning around quickly. “you two need to be more aware of your surroundings.”

“dammit, yeosang!” groans jongho, glaring daggers at the back of yeosang’s head. “why do you have a knack for interrupting my bonding time with my wife?”

yeosang turns around and deadpans at jongho while you hit the back of his head, telling him to behave. “it’s not that i have a knack for it,” he says, “it’s just that you two always do all this lovey-dovey stuff in public areas of your house.”

“he’s right, you know,” you laugh. “i told you that you should just save this stuff for when we’re in private, dear.”

jongho huffs. “hey, yeosang! jinho wants to see you before going to bed, so hurry it up because he has to wake up early tomorrow for football practice.”

yeosang rolls his eyes, placing the wine bottle on the small table in front of the couch right beside of vase of plastic flowers and disappears up the stairs. jongho then nuzzles his nose into your neck. “i still think we should try having another kid.”

you raise an eyebrow, ready to respond only to end up gasping, feeling jongho’s teeth graze your neck in a playful manner before gently biting down. your arms slide around his shoulders and a hand finds its way into his hair, tugging him closer while pulling at the ends, earning a low groan from him. “w-well, i’m not o-opposed to the idea of…” pausing, you try your best to whine quietly as jongho bites down harder on your neck, his knee coincidently rubbing against that one spot where you need him most now. “...of having another kid.”

“really?” jongho hums. “you don’t mind it, pretty girl?”

“n-no…”

“well—”

“oh. my gosh.”

you scramble away from jongho, pushing him away and falling off the couch, running past yeosang and towards your room. yeosang turns to look at jongho, who is already glaring at him.

“i think you should go now.”

“yeah, i think i should go now, too.”

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BLURRED LINES AND LIES | yuyusuyu 2023

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yuyusuyu · 7 months

Text

blurred lines and lies — kang yeosang, it was you in the beginning and it's you in the end

warnings. crying, small displays of affection. if there's anything i should add, let me know!

wc. 2.1 k

reblogs and comments are appreciated! helps with not getting shadowbanned!

“hey, choi jongho! stop fooling around, you punk!” YOU chide the older man that keeps taking long strides past the dining table where you’re currently sat, clicking away with your mouse. jongho merely laughs in response.

“you need to loosen up,” he says, shaking his head. “moonhee says that you need a break because you’re driving yourself crazy.”

“oh, moonhee,” you coo, “she’s such a sweet girl. unfortunately, as much as she's in the right, i can’t take a break. everything needs to be perfect for the opening.”

jongho opens his mouth to comment on something, but you interrupt him, glancing at him. “how is moonhee, by the way?”

“she’s doing great! she just got a promotion,” he gushes, smiling widely. “and last week we went over to busan for our second anniversary. you should head over there sometime: it’s really healing.”

you snort. “you are so in love, jongho. i’m happy for you.”

“thank you,” he says. he takes a seat next to you and wiggles his eyebrows, making you blink in confusion. “so… what’s going on with you and yeosang?”

you turn to look back at your laptop’s screen, feeling embarrassed. clearing your throat, you answer, “he’s been doing well. he also just got a promotion, so we haven’t spoken much because he’s been busy with that and… well, the time difference is also a pain.”

“so that means you two aren’t going to date yet?”

“choi jongho!” you whine, grabbing the nearest item, which happens to be a roll of paper towels, and fling it towards him.

jongho laughs loudly, catching said item before it can even hit him. he places it down on the center of the dining table, leaning towards you. “i’m being serious, though. it’s been five years and you two still haven’t gotten together?”

“he’s busy,” huffing through your nose, you continue to click away. “and i’m busy, too. the timing… it just isn’t right… you need to leave, by the way! wouldn’t want you getting late to your game night ritual with moonhee.”

“right,” jongho stands up, patting your shoulder. “i’m just looking out for you, you know. i don’t want you getting hurt because of him.”

“i’m a big girl now, jjongs. i know what i’m doing.”

he hums. “i would hope so. i’ll see you later, then.”

after fetching his things, jongho leaves you alone in your apartment. you’re doing some finishing touches to the document you’ve been working on when your phone rings. fishing it out from your pocket, you beam at the caller id and accept the video call. yeosang’s face appears on the screen, his tired expression brightening when his eyes land on you.

“yn!” he grins, looking around him quickly. it’s very noisy on his end of the call, and you assume he’s looking for a quiet place to talk to you. “wait, give me a second.” you watch as he walks around, bowing his head occasionally until he lets out a breath of relief.

“okay,” he nods. “now we can talk. how have you been?”

“busy,” you chuckle, “but good. and you?”

he repeats your answer, making you giggle. “i hope you’re not overworking yourself now that you got that promotion you’ve been working so hard for, yeo.”

yeosang smiles, nodding. “don’t worry, i’m not. i’ve accomplished my goal, so now i can rest easy. well… i’ve almost accomplished everything,” he pauses, pouting slightly. “there’s just one more thing i have to do.”

“oh?” with your interest piqued, you tilt your head to the side, a teasing grin on your lips. “and what could that be?”

he shakes his head, laughing. “it’s a surprise. i—” an announcement interrupts him, and you furrow your eyebrows.

“yeosang, what was—”

“i have to go,” he says quickly, “i’ll see you later, okay? take care for me, yn.”

“oh? wait, yeo—”

the call ends. you repeatedly blink down at your phone until another call comes in. you rush to answer it, the caller being your assistant, and walk into one of your rooms. you soon forget about that odd call with yeosang, focused on the opening of your studio set in two days instead.

you’ll just ask him later the next time he calls you.

you fight the urge to wipe your hands on your beige dress, and instead readjust the black coat hanging on your shoulders. your assistant hands over a pair of silver scissors, and you thank her quietly and turn back to face the people who were invited to the opening of your photography studio. you smile at them, seeing a few familiar faces like some of your clients and colleagues from your old job, seeing jongho and moonhee beaming at you and flashing you a thumbs up. it’s a small group of people, but they’re all important to you because they motivated you to follow your dreams of opening up your own photography studio. you turn around and open the scissors, snipping through the red ribbon and watching the satin flutter to the ground.

and then you hear clapping accompanied by the loud beating of your heart. you thank everyone as they take turns to come up to you and hug and congratulate you before looking around at some of your photos that hang on the walls. your lips hurt from how hard you’ve been smiling when it’s jongho's and moonhee's turn. moonhee hugs you while jongho stands behind her, hands in the pockets of his slacks.

“look at you!” moonhee says, pulling back. “you look so pretty, yn!”

“speak for yourself, moonhee,” you giggle. “you look like an angel!”

“oh, stop it,” she flushes in embarrassment and takes a step back into jongho’s side. his arm instinctively wraps around her wait and you tease him, laughing loudly when his face is a bright pink color.

“thank you two for coming,” you hold both of their hands, slightly shaking them. “it means the world to me.”

“you're our best friend,” jongho says. “we wouldn’t miss it for the world, yn.”

with one last hug from each, jongho and moonhee head to mingle with the other guests. you exhale slowly, ready to join them when you stop.

“hi.”

“you… how are you here?” you stare with wide eyes at yeosang, who stands right in front of the entrance to the studio. he’s wearing a white turtleneck paired with black slacks and a black long coat, and he holds a stupidly large bouquet of flowers. “i thought… wait, were you at the airport when you called me?”

he smiles nervously, nodding. “i was… surprise?”

you stutter, feeling overwhelmed by yeosang’s sudden appearance. you stop talking when he walks until he stands in front of you, your breath getting caught in the back of your throat.

“my promotion,” yeosang’s eyes trail all over your face, and one of his hands comes up to gently caress your cheek. you subconsciously lean into his touch, still staring at him. “do you want to know why i worked so hard for it?”

you slowly nod.

“whoever got the promotion would get transferred to the main office here in london. i… i came here because of work—wait, no, that’s wrong, sorry.” you bite the inside of your cheek, amused at how yeosang stutters now, the hand holding your cheek slightly trembling. “i mean, at first it was for work but… i really came here for you. i just… i really hate not being with you, it’s the worst feeling ever. it’s like i can’t breath and i don’t know what to do and—”

“you’re rambling, yeo,” you lift your hand and brush away a few strands of his black hair from his forehead. “how are you… even here? at my studio?”

his neck feels hot from how you’re looking at him with such a lovesick look in your eyes. yeosang takes a deep breath. “you mentioned it once,” he whispers. “back when you first started remodeling the building. you also mentioned that the opening would be tonight not too long ago.”

yeosang looks away from you and at the flowers. “i also promised i’d be there for you no matter what,” he shakes the bouquet slightly, still refusing to look at you. “i’ve missed so many important events in your life for so long… and i hurt you.”

you cup his cheeks when he sniffles, gently turning his head so he could look at you. “yeo, it’s in the past. you’re here now, aren’t you?”

he shakes his head, frowning. “i don’t… i don’t have the right to love you after everything that i put you through.”

your own hands start to tremble in shock. he loves you?

kang yeosang loves you?

“and i’m angry with myself,” yeosang continues, furrowing his brows. “i was so blind to how you felt and blind to my own feelings as well.”

“as well?” you repeat, your voice quiet.

“it was always you,” yeosang says in a hushed voice, barely audible but you hear it loud and clear. it rings in your ears and makes your chest feel warm. “and it will always be you.”

you’re the one that starts crying this time, and yeosang wipes away your tears gently with the hand that still holds your cheek. “you’re the one i wanted back then, the one i want now and tomorrow, forever and always.” his hand falls from your face to hold onto your own that holds his face. “i always think about you.”

“you do?” you ask in between sniffles.

yeosang nods. “always. when we were apart, i missed you. it just feels weird not being next to you all the time… i honestly think i have some separation anxiety when it comes to you,” he lets out a breathy chuckle. “everytime i thought about you, my chest would hurt because i missed you so much.”

your laugh takes him by surprise, and yeosang feels like heart might just jump out from his chest when you suddenly hug him. thankfully, he reacted fast enough to move the bouquet out of the way as he wrapped his arms around your waist as best as he could.

he drops his head onto your shoulder, his nose nuzzling into your skin. “i’m so angry that i love you because you deserve better than whatever mess i am.”

“but there’s no one better than you, yeosang,” you say, your arms holding on tighter around him. “my yeosang.”

“i can’t believe it took you three years to propose to her,” you tease, leaning against the wall as you watch jongho pace around the room. he throws you a harsh glare, to which yeosang raises an eyebrow at him.

“did you just glare at my wife, jongho?”

jongho huffs and looks away. “i didn’t.”

yeosang smiles. “mhm, that’s what i thought.” he wraps an arm around your shoulder, holding you close to him.

you turn your head to look at him. “can you believe that it took jongho three years to propose to moonhee?”

he shakes his head, tilting his head towards jongho and grins. “not at all, my dear wife. it only took me less than a year to propose and get married to you.”

jongho snaps his head over to the two of you when you start laughing. “shut up,” he hisses.

“hey, watch your tone when you speak to my wi—”

the door to the room swings open. you and yeosang flinch, and jongho laughs at the two of you just as san walks in. he points at his cousin. “auntie and uncle want to see you before the ceremony starts.”

after the door clicks shut when san and jongho leave, yeosang steps away from you and holds out his hand. you look at him, huffing through your nose in amusement. “what are you going, yeo?”

“dance with me for a bit,” he shakes his hand, prompting you to take it. yeosang pulls you towards him as soon as you grab his hand, humming a song as you two sway to it. you laugh at him, shaking your head at his antics. yeosang continues to hum, watching your every move.

you pout and look away from him. “why are you looking at me like that?”

“because i love you,” he sings, twirling you around. “you love me too, don’t you?”

“i do,” you respond, coming to a stop and laughing again when yeosang frowns.

“say it the right way, yn.”

“say what the right way, yeo?” you tease, pinching his cheeks.

he only repeats himself, his hands resting on you waist. he steps close to you and presses his forehead against yours. you kiss the corner of his lips, “i love you, yeo. always and forever.”

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BLURRED LINES AND LIES | yuyusuyu 2023

64 notes · View notes

yuyusuyu · 9 months

Text

blurred lines and lies — 02. a blurred line that split into two

warnings. mentions of food. if there's anything i should add, please let me know!

wc. 2.59k

send an ask in my inbox or leave a comment to be added to the taglist! reblogs and comments are appreciated! helps with not getting shadowbanned!

YEOSANG stares at his room that lacks what makes it so uniquely his. his gaze drifts from the empty walls to you spinning around in his armchair, twirling and twirling around until you groan, complaining that you feel dizzy.

the male chuckles, taking a couple steps until he’s behind you, placing his hands down on the back and effectively stopping you from continuing. it makes you look up at him, blinking through narrowed eyes as you wait for the world around you to slow down into its rightful place.

“you good now?” yeosang asks, watching as you slowly nod your head, standing up from the chair. “woah,” he laughs, grabbing your arm when you stumble slightly. “easy there.”

you huff. “remind me to not do that again.”

“more like you have to remind yourself to not do it again.”

“oh.”

its painfully quiet as you remove yeosang’s hand from around your forearm, only to see that you can’t when he suddenly doesn’t want to let go. you clear your throat. “yeo…?”

“it’s just,” he stops, thinking for a moment before sighing. “it’s just weird… to think about it, you know? us not being together for this.”

instead of replying, you take a deep breath and lean in to hug him. yeosang slumps against you.

“it’s weird to even think about it,” he mumbles. “you’ve always been there.”

“and i always will be,” you say, patting his back. “it’s you and i against this world.”

yeosang chuckles. “us against the world.”

“us against the world.”

it’s mid-september, a little over a month since yeosang left, when you meet choi jongho.

when you think about it, jongho has always been there. you just never really saw him or knew him. maybe because you were too focused on yeosang, or maybe it’s because he was always quiet. either way, it doesn’t change the fact that you are painfully aware of how awkward this is.

“so,” you start, looking off to the side to see jongho already looking at you. you advert your gaze back to your desk, continuing to pack away your books. “for the project, i was thinking we could work on it at one of our places? where do you live?” you make sure everything’s neat before zipping your backpack up. you glance at jongho through your eyelashes, waiting for his answer as you stand straight and place the straps on your shoulders.

jongho blinks at you before replying. “in the apartment complex by x park.”

you looked at him with wide eyes. “you live there too?”

he coughs, shuffling on his feet. “i, uh, already knew you lived there. i saw you a lot… you were with that one guy.”

at the mention of yeosang, you laugh. “you mean yeosang?” you ask.

jongho nods. “mhm. i haven’t seen him as much lately.”

“that’s because he’s in college now,” you say, starting to walk out of the classroom. “anyways, are you free this saturday to start working on the project? you can come up to the floor i live on.”

jongho nods, following after you as you two begin to leave the school. but then he stops dead in his tracks by the school gates. sensing the lack of his presence, you look back and tilt your head at him. “what’s wrong?”

“i, uh,” he pauses, his eyebrows furrowed. “well, is it okay if i walk with you? since we’re both heading the same way…”

you laugh, your eyes closing as you cover your mouth. “jongho, you don’t have to ask. we live in the same apartment complex and we both have to go there.”

he chuckles, quickly catching up to you as you resume walking. “yeah,” he says, “i guess you’re right.”

“he’s really awkward,” you take a peek at your phone, watching yeosang as he swivels around in his armchair. “but actually really funny. he doesn’t even have to try. yesterday, i honestly don’t even know how he did it, but he managed to make a joke out of my dad’s joke and you know my dad’s jokes aren’t funny, yeo. ”

“is that so?” he hums, still spinning around in his chair as he looks up at the ceiling of his dorm. “i’m happy you made a new friend, yn.”

“i’m happy too,” you laugh, carefully holding onto your laundry basket as you make your way to your room. “easy there, by the way. you’re going to get dizzy and i’m not there to actually stop you, you know.”

yeosang also laughs as he stops spinning himself, letting the armchair slow down by itself. “yeah,” he says, happily sighing. “but you are here. maybe not physically, but you’re here… does that even make sense?” he asks, groaning afterwards.

“it does,” you reply instantly. “you’re here, too… you know that i’ll always be there for you, right? no matter what… i’ll be there.”

it’s then that yeosang sits up, wobbling a bit in his seat before he shakes his head to look at his phone. “i know,” he says. “and i’ll always be there for you, too, no matter what.”

entering your room, you grin, placing your laundry on your bed. “it’s us against the world, yeo.”

“us against the world. always.”

he lied.

you find that it’s easy—becoming friends with jongho is easy. he’s comfortable to be around and is a great friend overall. being friends with him is so easy that you soon tell him about everything: about the importance yeosang has in your life, about your biggest fears and secret dreams that yeosang only knows, about how you wish to break free from the shackles that hold you down and keep you from pursuing what you love. jongho’s always quick to give you advice and comfort, lending you his shoulder while you cry your frustrations out.

something you only ever did with yeosang.

and ever since september, you learned a lot about jongho. you learned that his parents enrolled him a year later and that’s why he was in the same year as you instead of being in his last one, learned that he loved soccer and wishes to pursue a career in it, learned that he has an amazing voice when singing after having gone to a karaoke place after a particularly rough math test, learned that he is incredibly strong, learned that he absolutely hates physical affection and touch. once, you saw that a friend of his was going to hug and jongho immediately stopped his friend from doing so. you also learned that he didn’t like going to new places without someone he knew going with him, and learned that he preferred to give advice rather than being the one on the receiving end.

another thing you learned: apparently, your dads had been best friends throughout high school and even now. it’s how you wound up going to some random field to watch your dad, jongho and his dad and brother play soccer before heading out to play golf and then calling it a day on saturdays (because fridays were specifically reserved for eating dinner with the kangs, according to your mom).

you fell into this little routine easily: eating dinner with yeosang’s parents and your family on fridays before spending time with your dad and jongho’s dad and brother the next day. it was nice. it brought about a lot of comfort and a sense of peace into your seemingly chaotic one with all the thoughts you have in a day.

who you want to be, where you want to be, what you want to do, what you want… all the same thoughts yeosang had when he was seventeen.

whenever you talk to yeosang about jongho, he’s always happy, saying that he’s glad you have someone but there’s always something he wants to tell you but just can’t. even now, as you lay on your bed eating a tub of ice cream with some action movie playing on the tv, he looks at you as if he needs to tell you something but just can’t.

“you,” you point at him with your spoon, “are hiding something from me, kang yeosang.”

“what?” he asks, stuttering and almost falling off his bed. “what makes you think that?”

you shove another spoonful of ice cream into your mouth before replying. “you look like you’ve been wanting to say something since the beginning of october. yeo, it’s almost december now.”

he exhales shakily, running a hand through his long hair. “i… i also made a friend.”

“really?” you ask. you place the tub of ice cream to the side, sitting up on your bed. “well, i’m sure they’re amazing if they managed to befriend you.”

yeosang laughs softly. “yeah,” he breathes out. “she is pretty amazing.”

your throat runs dry.

she.

“i’m sure she’s pretty amazing,” you cough, smiling at him through the screen.

and she is pretty amazing. that’s why you’ve never blamed yeosang for choosing her.

you don’t know what even drove you and jongho to start studying for finals a week earlier than what everyone usually does, but here you two are, sprawled on his bedroom floor with all sorts of notes and textbooks littering the floor.

and that’s also how you find yourself walking back from the convenience store with a bag of snacks clenched tightly in your hand all because you lost at three games of rock, paper, scissors.

“he so cheated.” you grumble, puffing a cloud of warm air out from your lips, watching as it appears and disappears from how cold it is. you wince, bringing your hands up to your mouth to blow on them before slowly walking again, eventually making it back to the apartment complex.

you let out a sigh of relief, happily shaking the snow off your hair and thick coat, stomping on the welcome mat afterwards to get your boots rid of the already melting snow. then, you start climbing the stairs, cursing and complaining about how the elevator has yet to be fixed despite it having been almost a month since it broke down.

you make it to the first floor—the floor where jongho and his family lives—and just as you take a step forward, a voice calls out.

“yn?”

you turn around so fast that you end up getting whiplash. yeosang almost laughs at you, but nonetheless goes down the last few steps of the stairs that lead up to the second floor to get to you.

“your yeosang?” this time he does laugh. “i’m still the same.”

“sure… that’s what they all say.”

“oh, come on—”

“yeosang?”

both you and yeosang stop your playful banter to look up at the stairs, finding a girl looking at the both of you curiously.

“oh, younghee! come here,” yeosang beckons younghee over, and she climbs down the stairs, standing next to yeosang and leaning against him.

the sight takes you aback because yeosang also doesn’t like physical affection.

“younghee, this is yn, my best friend.” he pauses to ruffle your hair. “yn, this is younghee, my girlfriend.”

your throat runs dry once again and before you can reply, your phone goes off. “oh, excuse me for a second,” you mumble, hurriedly taking out your phone and answering the call.

“yn, how long does it take to get some snacks from down the corner? i’m starving!”

“jjongs, you need to be patient, damn,” you huff. “i’m right outside the floor, actually. i’ll be there in a minute.”

“good, or else i’ll steal your food.”

“you say that as if you won’t be stealing it anyways.”

“you’re right,” jongho laughs. “now hurry up, please!”

clearing your throat, you stuff your phone back into your coat. “i’m so sorry, but i have to study with a friend right now. i hope to talk to you more, younghee.”

“likewise,” she says, smiling.

you give both of them a small wave, not bothering to wait for yeosang to speak up because you saw that he did want to say something before you’re already walking as fast as you can to the chois’ apartment.

yeosang has a girlfriend.

and it isn’t you.

you don’t really hang out with yeosang these days, choosing to avoid him and instead spending your time at jongho’s place, telling him that your place isn’t safe enough. even your parents noticed how you’re going of your way to avoid yeosang and the kangs next door, but they never had the chance to talk to you about with the christmas preparations your family and the chois were doing, along with planning a road trip down to the coast right after christmas.

this is going to be the first christmas and new years that you won’t be spending with yeosang and his family.

much to your distaste, your mom decided that the christmas dinner will be held at your place. but maybe it’s not all that bad with jongho around.

you and jongho laugh as both of your moms kick you out of the kitchen, telling you to go wait out in the living room instead of trying to throw whatever you guys could find at each other. the doorbell rings, and you yell that you’d get the door, giggling as you open the door and shove jongho away from you when he tries to open it.

“oh.” blinking at yeosang, you shuffle awkwardly on your feet. “hi, yeosang.”

“hi,” he says. “i was just stopping by to tell you that… well, um, you know…”

you furrow your eyebrows. “um, no, i don’t know.”

“we won’t be spending today together,” yeosang finally says. “but mom said you could stop by later.”

“oh,” you clear your throat. “i won’t be able to go.”

yeosang frowns. “why not? is this about younghee, yn? you’ve been awfully distant after i introduced you two.”

“what? no,” you scoff, glancing to the side to see jongho already looking at you, almost as if he’s waiting for you to tell him something. you look back at yeosang, sighing. “i’ve just been busy with studying for finals, and my family has been spending a lot of time together with jongho’s. i do really want to get to know younghee, though. i promise. i just can’t right now.”

“is that so?” yeosang hums, quirking an eyebrow.

“yeah.”

both you and yeosang whip your heads to look at jongho as he squeezes next to you, shoving you slightly. he quickly introduces himself to yeosang.

“so you’re jongho!” yeosang says. “yn talks about you a lot.”

“oh really?” he looks at you, wiggling his eyebrows. you shove him away from you as he laughs, stumbling a step away before regaining his balance. “i’m honored, really. but yn is telling the truth, you know.”

yeosang blinks, waiting for jongho to continue.

“our families planned a trip to the coast,” jongho says, shrugging as he stuffs his hands into the pockets of his slacks. “we’re leaving tomorrow morning and won’t be back until the start of our second semester.”

“oh,” yeosang says. “i see… i hope you two have a fun trip then.”

“we will,” jongho grins, slowly closing the door on yeosang. “it was nice meeting you… yeosang, was it?”

“yeah… yeah. it was nice meeting you too, jongho.”

when jongho closes the door, he turns to you. “you like him, don’t you?”

you sigh. “i don’t know… i think i do, jjongs.”

no. you do know. you just don’t want to admit it because you know you’ll get your heart broken.

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BLURRED LINES AND LIES | yuyusuyu 2023

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yuyusuyu · 9 months

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blurred lines and lies — 01. a line throughout the years

warnings. mentions of food. if there's anything i should add, please let me know!

wc. 0.7

send an ask in my inbox or leave a comment to be added to the taglist! reblogs and comments are appreciated! helps with not getting shadowbanned!

EVER since the beginning, it was just you and him.

you and yeosang.

yeosang and you.

it's weird, now that you think about it, how you managed to become friends with him. he was older than you by two years so you never saw him at school and you never interacted with him. your mom likes to say that it's because your family moved next door to his family, and how she and yeosang’s mom were childhood best friends and are still as such even now.

“it was purely a coincidence,” your mom told you once while you washed the dishes. “i didn’t know we were neighbors until i walked out at the same time she did with her son.”

yes, maybe your mom was right to a certain extent. you guys did, most definitely, meet each other because of each other’s moms, but becoming friends was another thing entirely. you think it's because yeosang just wanted to have someone around (you know you're right because yeosang never answers when you ask him about this).

regardless of the circumstances, you and yeosang were always together. you guys just clicked, falling into each other like puzzle pieces. at the age of six and eight, you and yeosang would have playdates, one of you two going to the other’s home after finishing homework and playing until it was time for one to go take a bath.

at the age of ten and twelve, yeosang began to grow into himself and you were always there to lend your shoulder to him as he struggled to voice his thoughts. when you entered middle school, yeosang had just entered his final year there. you wanted to experience everything middle school had to offer, your enthusiasm extending over to the overpriced middle school dance. even though yeosang had just grown accustomed to his introvertive ways, he still bought tickets with his allowance and took you to the dance, both of you leaving early—because it sucked—and spending the night over at yeosang’s while the two of you shared a bucket of vanilla ice cream—because yeosang hated strawberries—while making fun of how bad the dance was.

at the age of fourteen and sixteen, you had entered your final year of middle school while yeosang was in his second year of high school. you were starting to learn about yourself just as yeosang finally finished learning about who he was. yeosang was there to lend you his shoulder just as you did years ago. then it was your middle school graduation. you had been feeling sad, knowing yeosang wouldn’t be able to make it because he had finals that day. while you walked to receive your middle school certificate, you heard the one voice you wanted to hear. when your eyes looked everywhere in the gym as you walked back to your seat, it was then that you saw yeosang by the doors, holding a stupidly large bouquet of flowers that both of you knew would die within a week. he smiled a smile so big that you found your heart leaping and wanting to run over to him. it was then that fourteen year old you knew that you felt something for him.

at the age of sixteen and eighteen, you were in your second year of high school and yeosang was in his last. though you were sad that he’d be leaving soon, you were so excited for him. you couldn’t wait to know what school he’d get into, couldn’t wait to see him walk and get his diploma while you’d give him a stupidly large bouquet of flowers that you both knew would die within a week, and you just couldn’t wait to see who he’d become and what he’d do after graduating. you were there for him every step of the way, you were there when he got an email from his dream college. you saw how he nervously opened the email and ended up hugging you and spinning you around from how happy he was that he got in. you were there to help him study for his finals, you were there when he finally went to his first and last prom that year, you were there when he finally walked and got his diploma and finally gave him that stupidly large bouquet of flowers.

but at the age of seventeen and nineteen, things changed.

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BLURRED LINES AND LIES | yuyusuyu 2023

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yuyusuyu · 7 months

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blurred lines and lies — author's goodbye

hello everyone! first of all, thank you so, so, so much for reading this goofy series of mine and for giving it the love that you did! it truly always made my day whenever i would see someone giving feedback on any chapter whether it be showing distaste towards younghee the witch to showing support to jongho (and yeosang).

in my goodbyes to a series of mine, i like to talk a little bit about what inspired the series and all that good jazz!

inspiration... i took a lot of inspiration from ateez's not too late, faye webster's i know you, and mitski's i guess. however, somewhere along the way, i took a lot from my own experience with something almost similar to this. i used to have a friend since i was in fourth grade, and we'd have been friends for ten years this year. did i ever love him? i'm not sure, but i most definitely knew that he had a special place in my heart since he was very dear to me. he got a girlfriend, who i encouraged he should go after, only to learn she was toxic and manipulative towards the end. he decided to leave me behind and end our friendship for her because she asked him to.

honestly, i was really mad about it when i woke up and read his messages (yes, he texted me all of that). i'm thankful for my best friend who was able to talk sense into me, saying that i wasn't the problem but rather the girlfriend. (thank you always, my dearest dia).

it's been about a year since then. sometimes i wonder how he's doing, if he's still with his girlfriend (which i assume he is). i was very bitter up until recently, which was when i started writing this. i think this is just my way of saying goodbye to him and our friendship in all seriousness. i do still wish him the best, i always will. i just hope i look back at this goofy series of mine if he ever decides to reach out again and see that i shouldn't be as forgiving as reader is in this story (because i am a person who does believe in second chances! though, there was this one time my trusting nature got taken advantage of way too badly and, well, i try not to forgive others as easily as i used to. that is another story for another day omg another short series coming soon?!).

other than that, again, i just took inspiration from the three songs mentioned earlier! especially not too late, i would have that song playing hours on end while planning and writing the chapters!

in the beginning, this series was honestly going to be a two-shot where yeosang got cheated on and reader was just going to be there for him. i honestly don't know how it evolved into what it is now, but i went through my drafts on wattpad and i have a story similar to this where reader was in love with some dude from some group i liked at the time. reader watched said dude get married and then she fell in love with a mutual friend of theirs years later. i guess that's where i got the yeosang getting married idea from?!

when i was still planning the chapters and fine tuning the plot, yeoang and reader were always going to end up together. it just... felt right to me? jongho was always just going to see reader as just a friend, no more no less. but then i messed it all up and said: hm, why not have a love triangle! but with the love triangle, i didn't want to have just one ending. it wasn't fair to jongho, thus why both he and yeosang had their own ending!

a feedback i got for yeosang's end had me wondering about how it would actually be like if the story had ended with them being in a poly relationship. one thing is for sure: jongho would always be at yeosang's throat for no reason. yeosang accidentally cooked something reader didn't like? here comes jongho ready to tell him off for doing such a 'stupid' thing. jongho would for sure pick a fight over any thing, be it small or little, with yeosang. yeosang would, because he was always a little jealous of jongho from the start, either try to one up him in some way or get really insecure and grab reader's attention in that way and most definitely make a face of victory at jongho when reader decides to pamper him. very chaotic vibes, honestly. it's basically a war zone with reader being the mediator. unfortunately, i have no idea how to write poly relationships so you're all stuck with those two endings </3

i think that's everything i wanted to touch on! to my dearest friend who encouraged me to write this, dia who is not on tumblr which is a good thing because i would be so embarrassed if she were to read whatever i write, thank you!

if you have any questions regarding the story and whatnot, comment and i'll try to answer to the best of my ability!

again, thank you all for reading this! thank you all for liking the plot and sticking around for when i updated the series!

with much love,

yuyusuyu aka dea aka drea :)

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BLURRED LINES AND LIES | yuyusuyu 2023

#— ꒰‧⁺ ⌨︎ blurred lines and lies !#yuyusuyu #ateez #yeosang #jongho

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