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wedreamedlove · 4 years

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Not Too Much, Not Too Little, Juuuust Right [Xu Mo Character Study]

Reddit archived.

I got a weekly chat recently from Xu Mo that made me appreciate all over again just how much of a wordsmith he is and his massive EQ (emotional quotient intelligence).

So, I wanted to explore that in more depth here and then slide into how love is a poison that worked its way into Xu Mo and is disrupting all his plans LOL.

Spoilers goes up to Chapter 9 but mentions Chapter 13. I'm also going to be doing direct comparisons to the English version because Elex did Xu Mo so dirty at the beginning.

First, I always need to give credit to @sharinluna and their comment in my Speech Quirks post (which I'm still updating to bring over) because I can never stop thinking about it whenever it comes to Xu Mo vs. the ENG server and how his social class is present in the game but difficult to convey to an English audience due to cultural differences.

I mentioned this in my Character Study on him but TL;DR Xu Mo being a distinguished neuroscientist and professor is sort of like meeting a doctor who cured cancer or something. You'd feel like you need to be extra presentable and it'd be understandable if they wanted you to call them Dr. because they studied 8 years for that Ph.D. There's a sense of awe and respect, right?

Xu Mo: I'll participate. Good luck, classmate.

Xu Mo: The next time we meet, you can just call me Xu Mo.

Here at [Main Story 1-9] you see that Xu Mo immediately gets rid of the distance between him and MC. I won't comment on the English version here, because it's a tough cultural one here. But Xu Mo calling her a classmate puts them on the same social level.

He takes that further by giving her permission to directly use his name. This is notable because it's normal to call people by their last names or titles in Asian countries. You don't assume closeness unless you're around the same age, permission is given, the time is judged to be right, etc.

Xu Mo: I'm laughing at how every time you let me help you, you'll always say reservedly at the end, "Thank you Xu Mo, it's all because of you."

Xu Mo: (Raises an eyebrow) What, am I that scary?

Here at [Footage 1-7] he points out how reserved she still is with him and then, again, makes another request for her not to be so reserved or scared around him.

The rest is close enough to English so I didn't show it, but I did show the above because in Chinese he imitates her voice and it's another instance where he's working to soothe her nerves. He's lightening the situation and making himself come off as silly and cute. He also structures his question in a way where he's not emphasizing whether or not SHE'S scared but if HE'S scary.

Now, in this next section, I want to point out that Xu Mo knows deepening a relationship quicker requires some stimulus and he's a master of introducing and relieving tension.

If you constantly flustered the other person and left them feeling embarrassed, then you'd be known as an aggressive flirt and you'd risk scaring them away. But if you fluster them and then give them some space by stepping back and smoothing the conversation over, then you're a charmer.

Xu Mo: In conventional terms, I believe it's called a "date".

Xu Mo: Mm, you don't have to think too much on it. We're just searching for interesting things together.

This is Xu Mo's first call which comes after [Main Story 1-14] and he asks MC how she's going to thank for his help on Miracle Finder. That's the introduction of tension. He's clearly flirting and MC is flustered as she racks her brain for something. He relieves the tension by taking over and asking if he can make a request. Then he introduces it again by hinting at having a date. But then he relieves it again by telling her that she doesn't need to think too much about it.

The reason I brought up a direct comparison is because of the nuance in "Don't read too much into it" vs. "Don't think too much on it". The former implies that she's not supposed to put importance on it being a date, because it's not true. The latter sneakily gives her the option of not needing to put importance on it, but it can still be a date and he's just not admitting it.

WORDSMITH!

To be honest, I wanted to avoid mentioning voice direction because that's a murky zone with personal preferences everywhere. However, I cannot resist this one part because it's the epitome of Xu Mo's scholarly demeanor letting him get away with things like this.

In [Main Story 2-11] Xu Mo calls MC to talk about folding light and then it leads to this teasing:

Today, a director from Miracle Finder came to discuss plans for the next show with me. Originally, I thought about having them leave [...] I thought you would come [...] More important than me? [...] Is it only for fresh ideas for your shows? [...] Haha, I'm feeling better now. I can talk with your director about the show's contents now.

He keeps his voice light throughout the whole conversation, and there's modal particles in there to soften his words. I also love the slight laugh he directs at himself and at the end. Again, he brings tension to the conversation by putting her on the spot but relaxes it by keeping things light.

In [Main Story 9-7] Xu Mo drops MC off at home after her hospital trip and teases her by asking if she's just going to thank him by saying "thank you". Tension is injected here! MC is flustered! Then he relieves the tension by saying there's many ways to show gratitude and she can take time thinking about it. He doesn't stay on this topic and instead leaves her alone.

Now, in this section, we acknowledge that all humans are unique and people have different levels of what they can tolerate. The same goes for our MC and we can see instances of Xu Mo adjusting his behavior according to her reactions.

Or, most notably, in [Main Story 5-6] Xu Mo asks MC:

Xu Mo: Then, could you change me if we continued to get along like this?

Um, there's a difference between "could" and "would" but I won't get into the semantics of that because I'm not a master in Chinese. However, I will note that the word he's using 能讓 means something like "can let, allow, can make" so it's an inherently soft verb.

Anyway, after this conversation, we end up at [Main Story 5-14] where MC criticizes the way Xu Mo treats girls because he's pleasant to everyone. He corrects her misunderstanding and explains the reasons behind his interactions with all the other girls.

However, he does take MC's words into account and adjusts his attitude accordingly. Hereon, he draws clear lines between him and other girls, although by nature he's still polite to everyone. It's another reflection of his emotional intelligence at how his attitude can't be judged wrong by anyone, and yet he can still convey his rejection and distance.

By the way, this is mentioned in his [CN Character Profile]:

Although he is gentle towards people, he makes people feel that there is a sense of distance, and it is difficult to really enter his inner world.

For example, in [Afternoon Date], Xu Mo politely answers the girl's questions about getting better sleep and then rejects her cake to him like so:

Xu Mo: I didn't help with anything, you're too polite.

Xu Mo: But I don't eat sweets. Thank you for your kind intentions.

Seriously, he leaves no room to be criticized. He was unfailingly polite, acknowledged her intentions, said he received them, but still rejected her cake. LOL.

In [Main Story 9-2] the nurse who is supposed to give MC an IV is super flustered in Xu Mo's presence and she misses the vein because MC unconsciously moves. Xu Mo tells her to try again and take it slow, because MC is going to be even more nervous now.

His words were seemingly casual, carrying his usual gentleness, but I could hear a hint of disaffection.

Translation? He's pissed. Haha, just kidding, but he's probably unimpressed with the nurse's incompetence and her attention on him, only he's too polite to let it show overly much.

Meanwhile, Xu Mo is also observing MC's reaction to him and adjusting his responses in consideration of her feelings (whenever he's not playing the flirting game).

In [True Love Date] everyone plays spin the bottle and answer questions, or get penalized with drinking shots. Xu Mo admits that he has someone he likes, but when they ask him to say who it is, he responds like this:

My heart beat even quicker as I buried my head deeper and my hand, which was held by Xu Mo, tightened unconsciously.

Xu Mo seemed to have realized something and, with a small smile, he raised his drink and drained shot after shot.

Are the translators only getting paid per scene and so they're dropping the latter half of every sentence? LOL...

Anyway, it's much clearer in Chinese that he feels her reaction, immediately understands, and just accepts the penalty with his usual elegance and smile. Or it could have been a chuckle. Oh god, Chinese and Japanese with their 笑.

Next, going back to [Main Story 9-2], Xu Mo is teasing MC and then gets called out. This is an interesting one because it doubles both as him restraining himself after her words, but also because he realizes that love is eating into him and he's reacting unconsciously and genuinely now.

He seemed to be deliberately imitating my earlier words, and the last syllable even rose up a little.

MC: Xu Mo, I haven't seen you in so long and yet you're getting better and better at making fun of me...

Hearing my words, Xu Mo was taken aback, and the smile in his eyes disappeared somewhat.

Xu Mo: Is that so?

Those three words were so light it was as if they had never slipped out of Xu Mo's mouth.

He quickly raised the corners of his mouth again, but the curve of his smile was more restrained.

Am I ever going to get over the translations for the hospital scene in Chapter 8 and 9? NO. NEVER. I hate it so much because it's two different worlds.

Changing gears to [Main Story 5-16] we get this observation from MC.

He's definitely a dangerous man! I need to stay farther away from him!

I'm sorry, but call me the fun police because I hate this translation too. I get it. The context allows for this after all his teasing, but you can get the same thing with the word dangerous. He's dangerous for your heart, he's dangerous for your hormones, etc.

The reason I'm being a stickler here is because MC isn't oblivious to Xu Mo's actions.

In [CN Archery Date] she thinks:

I tried to check Xu Mo's reaction, but he was just smiling. However, in those curved eyes, I felt like there were still hidden sides to him that I didn't know about.

From the day I met him, he concealed his inner thoughts and treated me with a calm, beautiful, and gentle smile.

That's why, up until now, I never thought he had a side like this to him.

MC knows Xu Mo wears a polite mask, but you don't just call people out on that LOL. Like any other relationship, you hope the other person will slowly open up to you. But, well, the reveal in Chapter 13 was probably not something she could have ever expected.

This is why I think the "dangerous" description up there should have been kept. It's some delicious foreshadowing that still lets you play around with innuendo.

Incidentally, the chat that made me write this post was:

MC: Xu Mo, have you ever had a time where you were furious?

Xu Mo: Not really. Living as a human means we need to control our emotions.

Xu Mo: There's even less of a need to be furious at something that's already happened.

First, he states his position and it's a mature one. Second, he then softens his superior position by generalizing how you and him both need to control emotions as humans. Third, he provides general logical advice without sounding like he's singling you out.

In comparison, I can easily see Kiro and Gavin sympathizing with your emotions and letting you vent. That's totally cool and that's their style because they're not the mentor-type. Meanwhile, Victor would probably point out how dumb you are for wasting time and energy getting angry instead of just going straight to fixing the problem. That's cool too, since he's the tough love type.

But you see how this sets Xu Mo apart? He's so skilled with his words. WORDSMITH!! I have a massive interest in social engineering and inherited my mother's social manipulation genes LOL so I love scholar archetypes and their word games.

If you're not doing it out of any malicious intent though then it's just a very considerate way of speaking and it's nice.

Conclusion. So, anyway, this was me wanting to admire Xu Mo's massive EQ. I'd say the only other person on par with him is Kiro, but Kiro has the natural kind and is more genuine because you can see him react truly to things.

Xu Mo is, much like his profession, a scientist who has probably studied how people interact with each other and perfected that. But this perfection in and of itself is what leads to a sense of discomfort with him because no one can be THAT gentle and placid all the time.

I always mention how disarming he sounds, because he's so good at social engineering, and it's only after the conversation is over and I take a few seconds to go over what was said that I'm like "Hey, wait a minute, that was actually alarming!?".

One of my favorite quotes is from the DUNE series by Frank Herbert and it goes: "To know a thing well, know its limits; Only when pushed beyond its tolerance will its true nature be seen."

This applies to Xu Mo. Knowing someone's bottom line helps you know them as a person and so we go into the next section where he shows genuine emotions.

LOVE IS A SLOW, SWEET POISON

Eyes are the window to the soul! EYES ARE THE WINDOW TO THE SOUL!! If I took a drink for every time there's a description about the ripples in Xu Mo's eyes (not even eye symbolism in general), I would be dead before even getting out of Chapters 1-10.

But, anyway, whenever there's flickering, surging, roiling, seething, welling, or shifting light in his eyes then it means he's feeling some heavy emotions.

Returning back to [True Love Date]:

Xu Mo stilled for a moment, light surging and roiling in his eyes, before I saw his Adam's apple bob.

For those with clever eyes, yes, the adjectives for the light in his eyes is supposed to draw references to water. Turbulent waves. Rolling waves. Surging waves.

I'm not going to show [Main Story 9-11] because the English was close enough with "Xu Mo's eyes welled with shifting emotions". They got the eye symbolism there at least! Chinese just went further by linking it directly to water again with how his emotions were like "swelling ocean tides at night".

Then, once these emotions hit their peak, they explode and deliciously unmake Xu Mo. He loses his calm and the contrast between the incidents I've shown above where he's been nothing but grace, elegance, and courtesy vs. this loss of control is fantastic.

In [True Love Date] we see Xu Mo corner the MC outside the washrooms because he misunderstands and thinks she's complimenting another man. Uh, no comment on the yelling in English vs. the quiet melancholic tone in the other versions. But the fact that he forgets his physical strength is a clear sign of a loss of control!

In [Midnight Date] he's trying to order himself to forget about MC and feeling a rope of thorns squeeze his heart. Uh, pretty clear sign of him losing control over his feelings again.

I would argue this all culminates in Chapter 9 when he realizes he loves her. In [Main Story 9-14] we get to see Xu Mo at his most human, where he lets himself feel, before he gets caught up in his plans again and sees them go awry at the end of Chapter 9.

Like the prophetic dream MC had in [Main Story 9-14], the ground has fallen beneath them and they're sinking into a deep ocean. The red spider lilies describe them well because the flowers and leaves can never touch and these two are separated with sadness and mutual longing... (or are they?).

Past Chapter 9, we literally don't see Xu Mo with MC until we head into Chapter 13 RIP. So, at [Main Story 12-22] we just see another example of Xu Mo trying to lock his humanity away again so that he can carry out his plan utilizing the MC.

The light in his eyes was still gentle but a bit unfamiliar and there was more of a sense of ordinary humanness.

The man nodded and turned around. His face was expressionless, and even his eyes lacked any emotion.

Took liberties in this translation, as always, because it's just impossibly hard to get across how fireworks symbolize mono no aware and the fleeting fragility of the human condition. So, when Xu Mo's eyes are described as having the breath of fireworks it means being grounded in the earthly realm as an ordinary human whose life shall pass, but that's why the moment you're living in right now is beautiful.

But... but he truly does love her LOL.

In the [2nd Trailer PV] Xu Mo says "You always... throw off my judgment" which is close enough to the Chinese line that translates to something like: "You always have me make the wrong judgment."

Perhaps it's unfair to criticize the English translation at the example below because translators generally don't have the full context of everything and often work solo with single parts (b-but that's why you need a good editor...).

However, I love looking at these two conversations together. This is from [Main Story 5-19] after Xu Mo mentions he hasn't slept for three days, and then Xu Mo's first call again after [Main Story 1-14] about the date-not-date:

Xu Mo: No, I don't. I just don't want to waste time on unimportant things.

Xu Mo: Relax together, share delicious meals, waste our time away...

Everything Xu Mo holds as important 1) his judgment and 2) his time because he doesn't do useless things has been overturned by the MC. That's love, baby!

In the words of Paul Valéry, a French poet and philosopher in the 19th century, "Love is being stupid together."

And you know what? In [True Love Date]... at least the Chinese version:

Forget it, he'll just be foolish once more with this foolish girl.

#mr love queen's choice #mlqc meta #mlqc lucien #mlqc xu mo #mlqc #love and producer #love and produc(ing) meta

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circuit-music · 3 years

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2020 Music Recommendations

2020 – WHAT A SHIT YEAR! There was so much craziness in those 365 days – from politics to a pandemic. Music was often times one of those things we could take comfort in or use it as a tool to express a range of emotions. I’m always surprised when compiling these list (of which I’ve been doing for 20+ years now it seems) that no matter the state of the world, there is always an overabundance of great music to be discovered. 2020 musically, delivered - including surprising returns from some bands who’ve been rather quiet in the past years like Consolidated, Cabaret Voltaire, and Portion Control.

The majority of what I listen to is electronic based music, with techno-body music being my favorite and there was STILL PLENTY of that in 2020 from labels like Aufnahme+Wiedergabe, Fleisch, Bite, X-IMG, Sonic Groove, SOIL, and more. Occasionally something a little lighter like the ethereal shoe-gaze goodness of Mint Julep (“Stray Fantasies” was an amazing record), or the post-punk of House of Harm (wonderful new discovery this year with “Viscous Pastimes”) and Sure (you all slept on “20 years” in 2020) works its way in to my listening. I still find synth pop from the likes of Riki, Korine, Tanz Waffen and Wingtips wonderfully appeasing. The wave material from the likes of Handful of Snowdrops, Linea Aspera, Zanias, Hante., Minuit Machine and Replicant was perfect for those melancholy moods. I even dipped into some aggressive near metal stuff this year from the likes of Pudeur, ESA and Youth Code – perfect for those days of anger. Oh, and I was thrilled to see a lot of exclusive, unreleased and remixed Curve material surface this year – a band who embraces several genres (walls of guitar, shoe gaze, industrial) and moods.

This isn’t a top 10, top 25 or even a top 100. Instead, it’s an A-Z recommendation list encompassing many genres as those lines are getting more and more blurred. A good tune is a good tune, regardless of genre.

HIGHLY encourage you to get out there and seek out new music; Visit the record stores, go hear a new DJ, fire up Spotify or another streaming service, check out some new music via podcast, DJ mixes, label sites, online retailers, even Facebook. One of the best sources for discovering new music is BandCamp - who in 2020 with the pandemic started BandCamp Fridays in which the site waived its normal fees to assist artist impacted. Taking place, the first Friday of every month, those will continue in 2021. There’s a plethora of discoveries to be found out there. If you do the work, you’ll be rewarded ;) Speaking of Spotify – I made a playlist this year featuring plenty of the bands on my list. There’s at least a track or more from the artist who have a presence on Spotify. Sadly a few bands on this list aren’t on the platform, but check BandCamp and you can have a listen. Here’s the link: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/02kQJZE7uvJxwHJD8j8zrh?si=SHlP4mVRTuaRejh6So3Mig

As in years past I’m certain I missed a few things, ignored the hype on certain releases or just plain forgotten something. It’s a chore to compile this list, but I love to do it. There’s a ton of new pioneering music out there for sure waiting to be discovered and it’s the “what’s next” that keeps me a motivated music fan. There’s never a dull moment in speaking, writing, DJ'ing or promoting new music, so I’ll keep doing it and hopefully be a guide for you all ;). If it needs mention and I overlooked it - I may do an addendum in the next week or so. Anyways, got your notepaper and plenty of beverages ready? Don’t be a TL:DR (Too Long: Didn’t Read) fool. Read up. Enjoy the music of 2020!

Onwards with the list!!! :D

2+2=5 - “Hidden In Plain Sight “ (COUP)

Absolute Body Control - “1980/2020” 3xLP (Oraculo Records)

Agent 15 - “Voices In My Head” (Drone)

Ah Cama-Sotz - “New Skin for Old Tribals “ (Self-released)

Andi - “Corpse to Corpus” 12” (Aufnahme+Wiedergabe)

Arabian Panther - “The Way of the Pentinent” EP (SOIL)

Arnaud Rebotini – “Workout: This is a Quarantine EP6” (Self-released)

Autumns - "You Always Taught Me Better" LP (Detriti Records)

Benedek - “Mr. Goods” 12” (L.I.E.S.)

Blac Kolor - “Extinction” EP (Aufnahme+Widergabe)

Blacksmith - “Dominated” (X-IMG)

Blitzkrieg Baby - “Remixed” (Aufnahme+Wiedergabe)

Blush Response - “Void In” LP (Megastructure) - “Void Out” (Megastructure)

Body Beat Ritual - "Raw Dogs” EP (Pleasure Corp)

Body Divide - “Pleasure From Pain” (Squarewav)

Cabaret Voltaire - “Shadow of Fear” LP (Self-released)

Calvary Stone - “Hate Unit” (Soil)

Caustic - “The King of EBM” (Self-released)

Cervello Elettronico - “No Sides” EP (SquareWav)

Choke Chain - “Chain Tactics” (Self-released) - “Grave” (Self-released)

Chris Shape - “Shaped to Deform” (Unknown Pleasures Records)

Chrome Corpse - “Detecting Movement” Ltd. Edition 12" EP (Oraculo Records) - “Helmet Mounted Display” (Self-released)

Chrome Corpse / Decent News - “Split” (Self-Released)

Codex Empire - “Broken by Fear" Ltd. 12” (Horo) - “Protected by Rage” 12” (Aufnahme+Wiedergabe)

Cold Cave - “Waving Hands” (self-releaesed)

Comfort Cure - “Serpentine City” (Rec.Body.Ltd)

Consolidated - “Capitalism” (Self-released)

Crystal Geometry - “Samiam” EP (Sacred Court) - “Senestre” 2x12” (Sonic Groove)

Curve - “Blindfold EP - Bootleg EP Series 1” (Self-released) - “Curve Oddities Bootleg Series 3” (Self-released) - “Curve Oddities Bootleg Series 5” (Self-released) - “Horror Head Raw DAT Mixes Bootleg Series 4” (Self-released)

Cyan ID - “Blurred Revelation” (X-IMG)

Dive - “Where Do We Go From Here” Ltd. Ed Box set (Out Of Line)

E.L.I. - “Dying to Live” (SOIL)

E.S.A. - “Burial 10” (Negative Gain Productions) - “Eat Their Young / The Scorn” (Negative Gain Productions)

Einstruzende Neubauten – “Alles In Allem” (Potomak)

Evil Dust - “Desolation” (Crave Tapes)

Fatal Morgana - “The Destructive Remixes” 12" (Mecanica Records) - “The Final Destruction” 2LP (Mecanica Records)

Filmmaker - “Reinvent” 12” (Soil records)

Fixmer - "Invasion” 12” (Bite)

Fixmer/McCarthy - “Unreleased From the Archives" (Planet Rogue Records)

Foreign Policy - “Watching Existence” 12” (X-IMG)

Fractions - “Nite NRG” (Monnom Black)

Further Reductions - “Array” 12” (Knekelhuis)

Hakai – “No Flesh Shall Be Spared” 12” (Megastructure)

Halv Drom - “Slum Vatic” LP (Fleisch)

Handful of Snowdrops - “Asymetrical” (NanoGénésie®) - “Echoes -The Complete Cover Collection” (NanoGénésie®) - “The Four Winds” (NanoGénésie®) - “The Impossible Dream” (NanoGénésie®) - “Watch Me Bleed / Theme for Great Cities” (Self-released)

Hante. - “Fierce - Remixes & More” LP (Synth Religion)

HKKPTR - “Macht & Ohnmacht” EP (Aufnahme+Wiedergabe)

House of Harm - “Vicious Pastimes” LP (Avant!)

Human Performance Lab - “Impact Situation” 12" (Aufnahme+Wiedergabe)

Inhalt - “Simulation” 2xLP Remixes (Mechatronica)

Iron Court - “Etched Forseights” (Detriti)

Istigkeit & Angel Karel - “You A’Int No Punk, You Punk” (RND. Records)

IV Horsemen - “Compilation Vol. 1” (Self-released) - “Human Crash” LP (Fleisch)

Karger Traum - “III” LP (DKA Records)

Kenny Campbell - “Blackest Ever Buckfast” (Drone)

King Dude - “Full Virgo Moon” LP (Van)

KLACK - "Two Minute Warning” (Klackprodukt) - “Move Any Mountain” (Self-released) - “Catching Up with Klack” (Razgrom) - “Distancing” (Self-released) - “Move Any Mountain” (Self-released) - “Probably” (Klackprodukt)

Konkurs - “Terminal Stage" (Megastructure, X-IMG)

Kontravoid - “Live from the Void” (Self-released) - “Too Deep Remixes” (Fleisch)

Korine - “The Night We Raise” LP (Data Airlines)

Kris Baha - “Barely Alive” 12” (Emotional Especial) - “Starts to Fall” 12” (Power Station)

Kutkh Jackdaw - “Sweat & Thunder EP and remixes” (Dark Disco)

Lbeeze - “Induced Expressions” (Phormix Tapes)

Liebknecht - “Demos The H4AR 2020" (Self-released) - “Koln : Total Harmonic Noize remix” (Self-released)

Linea Aspera - “LP II” (Self-released)

Looky Looky - “Are You There Beach?” (Self-released)

Machino - “Ciudad Violenta” (X-IMG)

Maedon - “Escape To Berlin" (Sonic Groove)

Marc Ash - “Mirror Glaze Lavish" 12" EP (Fleisch)

Marina Aleksandra - “Animal Industrial Complex” (Randolph & Mort. mix)

Max Durante - “Fear and Desire” 12” (Aufnahme+Wiedergabe)

Mind | Matter – “Souvenirs Brises” (Intervision)

Mint Julep - “Stray Fantasies” LP (Western Vinyl)

Minuit Machine - “Don’t Run From the Fire” 12” (Synth Religion)

New Frames - “Outer Limits” 12” (Bite) - “RNF2” 12” (R Label Group) - “Stylized Fear” 12” (Haven)

Nordstaat - “Singularity Second Coming” (X-IMG)

NZ - “More Of Us” 12” ltd. (Infacted Records)

Objekt Clermont - "Zeitgeist” EP (Self-released)

Ofelia Ortodoxa - “Maleficio” (Soil)

Pablo Bozzi - “Last Moscow Mule” (Dischi Autunno) - “Walk on Wire” EP (Bite)

Phase Fatale - “Scanning Backwards” 2xLP (Osgut Ton)

Portion Control - “Head Buried” EP (Portion-Control.Net) - “Seed 1” EP (Portion-Control.Net) - “Seed 2” EP (Portion-Control.Net)

Pudeur - “Magie Noire” (Area Z)

Randolph & Mortimer - “Enjoy More” 7” (Self-released) - “Manifesto for a Modern World” 2xLP (Mecanica) - “They Know We Know They Lie” (Self-released) - “Union of the Faithful” (Self-released)

Reka X Imperial Black Unit - “Todo Avaricia” 12" EP (Fleisch)

Rendered - “Stone Cold Soul” CD (Audiophob)

Replicant - "Regression” (Self-released) - “Annihilation” (Self-released)

Rhys Fulber - “Diaspora” EP (Aufnahme+Wiedergabe) - “Resolve” (FR Recordings)

Riki - “Riki” LP (Dais Records)

Rommek - “Break The Tension” 12” (Leyla Records)

Salem Unsigned - “Blood Origin” (RND.r recorcds)

SARIN - “Moral Cleansing Remixed" (Bite)

Schwefelgelb - “Der Puls Durch Die Schläfen Instrumentals" (n-Plex) - “Der Puls Durch Die Schläfen" (n-Plex) - “Die Stimme Drängt” 12" (Cititrax)

SDH - “Against Strong Thinking" 12" (Avant!)

Size Pier - “Typhoon in Busan” (X-IMG)

Soft Crash - “Spitzkrieg” 12” EP (Bite)

Soj - “Land of Lovers and Hammers” (Infidel Bodies) - “Slow Burn” (Industrial Complexx)

Statiqbloom - “Asphyxia Remixed” (Synthicide)

Sure - “20 Years” LP (Weyrd Sun Records)

T_ERROR 404 - “Holographic Skull” (X-IMG)

Tanz Waffen - “Led Astray” (Self-Released)

Teatre - “Crime Imagery” (Self-released)

Terrorfakt - “Achtung 2020 Remixes” (SquareWav)

The Marquis - “Poison” (Self-released) - “Scab” (Self-released)

Trauma Phase - “Human Caused Disaster Response” (Detriti) - “The Origin of Social Disabilities” (Self-Released)

Unconscious - “Regnum Novum” (X-IMG) -"Slaves of System" LP (Detriti)

Unhuman - “Voices of Distress” 12” (Bite)

Various Artisits - “ASM II “ (Forkha) with: Chrome Corpse, Mind|Matter, The Undertaker’s Tapes, Evil Dust and more

Various Artist - “Meta Moto 4” (Meta Moto) with: Borsis Barksdale, Raw Ambassador, Filmmaker, Teatre and more

Various Artist - “Antikhrist Visions vol. II” LP (Industrias Mekanikas) with: Downwell, Delectro and more

Various Artist - “BOY Records – Timeless Technology 1988 – 1991" 4xLP (Mecanica) Retrospective box of the legendary Boy label releases.

Various Artist - “Crime Violente Vol.4” (Up North Records) With: Calvary Stone, Lbeeze, Meshes and more

Various Artist - “Dystopia in Action” 12” (X-IMG) with: Alpha & Necromante, Kris Baha, Human Performance Lab and more

Various Artist - “Ecdisis Vol 2” (Frigio Records) Snag this for the outstanding edit of Portion Control’s “Chew You to Bits”

Various Artist - “Murder 01” 12” (Murder) with: Codex Empire, Crystal Geometry, JK Flesh and more

Various Artist - “Northern Nightmares Vol.1” (Up North Records) with: Autumns, Cardopusher, Teatre, Hate Magnum Opus and more

Various Artist - “Northern Nightmares Vol. 2” (Up North Records) with: Notausgang, NGHTY, Violet Poison and more

Various Artist - “Sonic Groove: 25 Years 1995-2020" 2xLP (Sonic Groove) with: Orphx, Crustal geometry, Maedon, Rhys Fulber & Portion Control and more

Various Artist - “Uncanny Valleys Vol. 1” (Area Z) with: Chrome Corpse, Sarin x Imperial Black Unit, Celldod, IV Horsemen and more

Various Artist - “Uncanny Valleys Vol. 2” (Area Z) with: Ah Cama-Sotz, 3.14, MDS51 and more

Various Artist - “Valley of Tears vol 1" 12” (Soil) with: Imperial Black Unit, Fractions, Exhausted Modern and more

Various Artist - “Valley of Tears Vol. 2” 12” (Soil) with: SOj, Djedjotronic, Years of Denial and more

Various Artist - “Seven Years of Delirium" (Liber Null) with: Blush Response, NGLY, Zanias, Celldod, Phase Fatale and more

Various Artist – “Detriti Split 1” 12” split vinyl (Detriti) with: Black Sun Dreamer and Trauma Phase

Various Artist – “Detriti Split 2” 12” split vinyl (Detriti) with: Mind | Matter and Iron Court

Visceral Anatomy - “Modern Anguish” EP (Oraculo Records)

Visitor - “Technofossil” (Braid Records)

Wingtips - “Tears Of Pearls" (Self-released)

Youth Code - “Puzzle” (Self-Released)

Zanias - “Extinction” 12” (Fleisch) - “Harmaline” (Self-Released)

Zola Jesus - “Live at Roadburn” (Roadburn Records)

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kerrylifeandloves · 6 years

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It was a foggy, dark morning last week that we arrived at Southend airport, the early hour adding to the silence that fog seems to encourage. My Mum and I were off for a short break to Luz, in the Algarve and we couldn’t have been more excited. It was the first time we had flown from Southend Airport, and a first time visit to Portugal for both of us, so it was all brand new. Parking the car, we headed for what we thought was the exit in the reduced visibility that the fog provided, relieved to have found it after wandering around the car park twice. The “exit” was actually the security mans gate and office. Opening the gate, expecting to see the walkway to the airport, we instead saw the surprised guard, enjoying hs 5am cup of tea. Asking him for directions, we stumbled back out into the fog, giggling like school girls, finally finding our way out of the car park. A fabulous start. Only we could get lost in a carpark, and find it hilarious. It seems we had set the tone for what became 5 days of fun…… In this post, with my stories, adventures and meanderings reserved for another day, (or we would be here until breakfast) I am giving you the low down, where to stay, eateries and cost guides for a short break in Luz The Algarve. Enjoy!

Where is Luz

Situated on the western part of The Algarve coastline, Luz and its neighbouring villages are small, low key and fairly unspoilt. Traditionally a fishing village, Praia Da Luz’s beaches are sheltered by the huge Rocha Negra basalt headland, creating a peaceful and calm stretch of soft sandy beach. With the cultural town of Lagos just 5km away (15 mins on the bus costing just €1.80) Luz is a fabulous, relaxed base to explore this beautiful side of the Algarve. Its compact, so ideal for a short break. The basalt headland was created 150 million years ago, when extremely hot lava pushed through the red sandstone of The Algarve, creating beautiful headlands striped with colour. At different times of the day these colours appear more vivid or muted, depending on the suns direction. Simply beautiful and I loved watching them change.

Sadly, many people think of Luz as simply the place that the gorgeous little girl Madeline went missing. That terrible tragedy happened 11 years ago, and of course we remember it. All I can say is that tragedy happens everywhere, and having been in Luz, it seems almost more shocking that it could happen there as it is such a tiny, sleepy little place. Luz is very, very safe and is incredibly popular with young families, couples and older, retired people looking for peace and quiet. It is beautiful.

October finds the beaches pretty quiet

Short Break in Luz The Algarve

Getting there

The fight from the UK to Faro airport, is a fairly short one, with the estimated flight time given as around 3 hours. As I said, we flew from Southend Airport, with Easy-jet, and it was super efficient and stress free. Our flight landed ahead of schedule at about 2.5 hours, so that was great.

I had carried out some research before hand on how to get from the airport to Praia Da Luz, and it seemed the simplest way was to organise a private transfer. You can get public transport, but it meant a couple of busses, so I decided to make our life easy and book a door to door car for the roughly 1.5 hour each way car journey. There are many companies offering a transfer service, and I went with one called Sunline Transfers, that had great Trip Advisor reviews. It cost around £100 for the return journey, which I know seems a lot, but I wanted peace of mind, and a seamless service. This was what I got and I was very happy with the transfer and care given to us.

Where we stayed

I was in Luz as a guest of travel rentals company of 14 years, Clickstay, who have holiday rental properties (over 60,000 of them) all over the world. I had met the brand at a blogging event last year, and had stayed in touch with them, so was thrilled and over the moon when I was offered the opportunity to go to Luz and stay in their Clickstay apartment in Luz. Mum came along as my plus one, and as she hadn’t been abroad for almost eight years, it made her year! The apartment that had been made available for us was in walking distance from the beach, on the second floor of a small block of 8 apartments. It was the first time in a long time that I had stayed in an apartment as opposed to a hotel, so I was really looking forward to the flexibility of it.

The view from the front balcony on the apartment

When we let ourselves in through the front door of our temporary home, we were shocked at how huge it was! (If you saw my Instagram stories, you would have seen my apartment tour and the size first hand) Once through the front door you are in a large hallway, with doors to two bedrooms and a bathroom leading off. We also found two foldaway beds, supplied if you need 6 beds, that can be put up in the spacious hall with more than enough room. There is also a set of double doors leading through to the massive lounge, dining area and open plan gallery kitchen. Off of the lounge there is a balcony to the front looking out onto the street and the sea in the near distance, and another balcony looking out over the communal pool. Two further balconies led off from each of the bedrooms. You can imagine all the light and brightness that all these balconies let flood in. Gorgeous. There is also a roof terrace if you want even more choices to enjoy the beautiful Luz weather.

The street that the apartment is located on

The main bedroom is like a suite in itself! I kept losing my Mum (or she kept hiding, you never know with that crazy woman)! You have the large double bed area, with an area leading off where the fitted wardrobes and a changing area are, then leading into a large en-suite bathroom. Talking of bathrooms, both of the bathrooms in the apartment had baths as well as showers, which is unusual in holiday lets. Its usually only a shower, and never two full bathrooms. Heaven for me and my Mum as we both love a bath! It was perfect. The second bedroom was very big, also with fitted wardrobes providing more than ample storage, (we were also pleasantly surprised to find there were plenty of clothes hangers, again, that never happens)!

front room, dining area and kitchen. So much room!

The apartment was spotlessly clean. I have to be honest and say that I am one of those people that check the bed and bathroom as soon as I get in a place, and they were immaculate. We were also amazed at how well equipped the place was. Everything had been thought of from a fully equipped kitchen, large tv with sky, a music system with a selection of cd’s, even a well stocked book shelf with books from all genres. It was fantastic and its those little touches that make you instantly feel relaxed and at home. A folder had also been created with restaurant recommendations, bus time tables, super market information, everything! It was so useful. You even had a car parking space in the private garage below the apartment block for a hire car if you had one. It was perfect!

A couple of points worth noting is that the apartment would not be suitable for wheelchair users, or perhaps families with babies in prams as you do have two flights of stairs to go up. The stairs are not steep or challenging for anyone without mobility issues, but there is no lift so I need to make you aware of that. Also, the block of apartments is situated on a road that has very small amounts of traffic. We are talking a few cars in what I suppose would be the time locals living in the immediate area are going to work. It is not noisy in any way in the apartment, but if you are outside on the balcony at the front at this time, you will hear the odd car. It is not something that we found troublesome in any way, but you know me, I am always 100% honest with everything I tell you lovely lot, so felt I should say.

The location of the apartment is ideal for exploring Luz, just perfectly placed. The gorgeous beach is just a 5 minute walk down the cobbled streets, and you can walk all the way along the promenade. Little cafe’s and low key restaurants line the sea front, so you can sit and have a coffee (or sangria, I wont judge) as we did every morning, (sangria was afternoon, we are not that bad…) people watching and just enjoying the relaxed and laid back vibe of Luz.

Where we ate

Now. Let me tell you about the food that the area has to offer. If you like good food, you are in for a treat! There are several really good restaurants very close by. I was in heaven! Portugal is known for its fresh fish, especially sardines (and Portuguese tarts, yum) so there is a huge amount of options for fish lovers. All of the restaurants that I mention here are within a 5 minute walk of the apartment. Iv also given you what we ate, and the price we paid so you have some idea of costs.

Yolo – What a treat this restaurant is, and it is just across the road from where we stayed. It has a real cosy, homely feel to it, with flickering candlelight on every surface and It was one of the two meals that we went “posh” with, so knew it would be a little more costly. Mum and I both had three courses, and both had two glasses of wine. We both had the most gorgeous fish cakes to start, which were amazing! Then seared, sesame seed crusted tuna steak on green beans for my main, and risotto with mushrooms and truffle for Mum’s main. To finish, I had banoffee pie with the best caramel sauce I have ever tasted in my life, and Mum had creme brulee. This meal came to €70

starter – fish cakes

best caramel ever

Fortaleza Da Luz – I loved this place, and we had three visits to here! Two were just for drinks though so don’t judge….. We decided to go here for our last night as we loved it so much. The building gets its name as it actually is a real, 1600’s fortress!

Situated right on the headland, overlooking the rugged landscape of the cliffs and gorgeous, uninterrupted views of the sea, its a beautiful spot. The restaurant boasts an open air terrace that makes you feel like you are floating above the sea, and the gardens are filled with colour and native plants. The view is spectacular and Mum and I enjoyed a jug or two of sangria here.They also do events like jazz afternoons that we would have gone to if we had more time. The inside of the building is just beautiful and you can straight away tell its heritage. The five feet thick walls and the archways within, give the restaurant an ambience that is fitting. We had a two course dinner here, as well as a jug of sangria. Starter was fish soup for Mum, and grilled goats cheese for me, then fish pie for Mum, salmon fillets with vegetables for me. We were full so skipped desert! This meal came to €54

beautiful gardens of the restaurant

PapiPizza – One night, we may or may not have had a few too many cocktails, so ended up with take away pizza from a tiny pizza place just across the road, that we took back to our residence……….. It was the best pizza ever! It cost us just €8 Food that night was a bargain, drink bill not so much……….

Cafe Jasmin – I have to mention this place as it is the cheapest for miles around, but delicious! Its ideal for things like toasted sandwiches, filled croissants, rolls, any cafe type food. It is not posh, but the food was amazing, the staff the friendliest ever, and again, its on the road we were staying on. We had two cheese and onion toasties, two Portuguese tarts and a soft drink each and it came to under €10 for all. Bargain!

Endless Summer – This little cafe on the promenade overlooks the beach and is the perfect place for a cafe latte and a Portuguese tart. Im not saying it was our usual regular morning spot, but by the end of the 5 days our choice was ready before we even ordered it…. A gorgeous place to while away and hour or two, chatting to the locals and ex-pats that call Luz their home, it was gorgeous. Two coffees, two tarts came to around €9

Ollie’s – Ollie’s is not a restaurant, but a cosy cocktail bar situated just two doors down from where we stayed. It is fantastic, so I had to mention it. Owned by a lovely young man called Ollie (funnily enough) he opened the bar this summer, and we felt he had got the decor, drinks menu and atmosphere just right. It has a rustic, welcoming decor and Ollie and his team are so friendly. As is tradition on holiday, you can even enjoy a happy hour(s) where cocktails are at a reduced price of €5. I can fully recommend the porn star martini’s. I tried a few so I could give you my honest opinion (ahem)….

So thats it! My guide to the resort of Praia da Luz. I hope you found this little guide useful. I will cover all of the things that you can do in Luz, the surrounding areas and things in another post. There is so much to tell!

*I was in Luz as part of a press trip for Clickstay, but my opinion, words, photos and experience was all my own.

So, tell me, am I the only person to have not previously discovered the beauty of The Algarve? Has anyone been before? Are you usually in a hotel on trips, or do you like the flexibility of an apartment? Do you think these restaurant prices are pretty reasonable? Do you treat yourself to a few “posh” meals when your on a trip? I have been so impressed with The Algarve, so if you have any recommendations of where else I should go there I would love to hear!

The Lowdown on a Short Break in Luz, The Algarve It was a foggy, dark morning last week that we arrived at Southend airport, the early hour adding to the silence that fog seems to encourage.

#clickstay #luz #portugal #praia da luz #the algarve #travel

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nerdspeaker · 7 years

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Whenever I get a choice to play as a monk class in a video game, I almost always do. I am not a religious man by any means, but I am fascinated by monk characters who channel power from spiritual forces, nature, and most importantly, within, to find enlightenment. As someone who has been through bad bouts of anxiety where I lose my sense of self, I equate a monk’s focus on finding balance and harmony both in themselves and the conflicts they face with the mindful practice I try to incorporate into my daily life.

Perhaps because of the violent nature of a lot of video games, playable monk characters are few and far between. That being said, Some of my favorite monks in games include:

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Zenyatta from Overwatch

Monk class from Diablo 3

Yang from Final Fantasy IV

Sabin from Final Fantasy VI

Liu Kang and Kung Lao from Mortal Kombat

To further explain my fascination with monks in games, I’ll explore the three ways I feel a monk’s path fits within my own life: Harmony in the face of violence, harmony within yourself, and harmony with the universe.

A monk in hard times: harmony in the face of violence

Violent games are still a thorny subject. Many gamers still have to defend their favorite hobby from people who claim violent games causes gamers to become violent themselves (see this great write up by fellow WordPresser Athena Veta on violence and gaming).

I am not averse to violent games, yet at the same time, I do tend to emphasize with my character’s motive. If they are all about killing for killing’s sake, I am less likely to enjoy the game as the senselessness of it all really gets to me.

Kratos, I love you – but maybe tone down the casual slaughter of innocent bystanders in your new game?

When I play a monk class character, I always feel like I am working to repair the very fabric of the world. A monk’s motivation towards renewing balance and harmony in the world is attractive to me, and their dual role as a combat aesthetic and often a team healer is also appealing as I can support my team in a dichotomous way. Yin and Yang if you will.

Sometimes conflict in the world is inevitable, but I would hope that if we could approach these conflicts with a regard to the humanity of the enemy and a desire to restore balance, those conflicts would not have to be violent ones.

Finding your center: harmony within

The power of the monk class, or any mystical or martial arts class, tends to stem from their ability to find focus within themselves.

As an occasional meditator and big believer in the concept of mindfulness, this focus on drawing power in discovering your center is appealing to me. In layman’s terms, mindfulness is the act of being present in everything you do; appreciating simple things such as your breath and your step, and recognizing that your true self lies beneath the endless chatter of your thoughts. In being mindful, supposedly you can better focus your body to do incredible things: in a martial arts sense, that may mean that your body is better able to flow and react to your opponent’s movements (I can’t say I have achieved a Bruce Lee-like level of focus).

That being said, while I don’t believe that mindfulness can help you develop actual healing powers, I appreciate that healing powers in games are an allegory for healing the world. Often people hear about “inner focus” or “being one with everything” and think it’s very hippy-dippy new agey. I suppose in some way it is, because it is so antithetical to our go-go way of life. But practitioners such as Jon Kabat-Zinn, who works at MIT but has also studied with traditional monks and meditation masters, helps frame mindfulness in a scientific way. Mindfulness practice actually has beneficial effects on the brain, reducing anxiety and increasing empathy.

When I play as a monk, I am reminded of the importance of this practice in my life, even when gaming. Though we all have a tendency to play games mindlessly from time to time, I try to play games more mindfully as well!

Finding meaning: harmony with the universe

As I mentioned above, I am not a religious man. I am also not particularly superstitious, in that I don’t believe in ghosts or fairies or demons (though I WANT to believe). What I do believe, however, is that everything in the universe is related to one another. After all, we’re all made up of atoms that arose from the big bang.

Carl Sagan once made the profound statement that we, as conscious beings, are a way for the cosmos to know itself. This statement is so powerful to me. We are literally made of star stuff, and there is power in knowing that everything in the universe is related in that way.

Being one with everything doesn’t mean that you literally perceive everything in the universe or control it, but that you recognize that everything in the world is connected. When you perform negative actions, the rest of the world is negatively impacted. Of course, the same is true for positive actions.

Heroes have many different motives, fame, fortune, destiny, revenge – though the motive of the monk is portrayed as a selfless desire to restore balance. This ideal, of working to save the world simply because it is the right thing to do, with no expectation of reward, is probably the most difficult one for us to actually live, but also the most admirable to reflect on trying to accomplish in our own lives.

So there you have it, my monk-as-a-playable-character fascination. Do you have a favorite class in games? If so, how do you relate to them? Please let me know in the comments!

If you enjoyed this post, consider following Nerd Speaker on Twitter and Facebook so you’ll never miss another rant!

Discover why the monk class is the best to play in video games when you're struggling to find yourself. Whenever I get a choice to play as a monk class in a video game, I almost always do.

#Anxiety #Blizzard Games #Carl Sagan #Diablo 3 #Final Fantasy #monk #overwatch

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