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Evaluating Your Previous Business Year to Figure Out What Worked and What Didnāt
One of the most important things that successful people do, and particularly those who run a business, is to keep a mindful eye on where they have come from and where they intend to go.
The turn of the New Year is a great opportunity to set resolutions and new goals, but many times, one of the most overlooked aspects of doing so is in looking at what you achieved. In fact, you might feel that you werenāt successful at achieving your resolutions until you sit down and spend the time to put together an evidence list.
How to Use an Evidence List to Track Your Success
An evidence list is one of the greatest confidence boosters and ways to evaluate what has worked and what needs to be improved. An evidence list is where you record everything successful you have achieved over the past week, month or year. When you are looking back at a full year of all of the little wins that youāve stacked up, whether it was outsourcing to a virtual assistant for the first time, increasing your revenue by a particular percentage or bringing on high-value clients, you can celebrate all of the things you achieved.
You might also begin to see patterns emerge that can tell you where your business should go in 2018 and beyond. For example, I identified over the course of my 2017 review that affiliate marketing was a cornerstone of my game plan for 2018. Thatās because I finally began to see the revenue trickling in, in a manner that made sense for me to up my affiliate marketing game.
For that reason, I spent days planning how I was going to enhance my affiliate marketing income and program and even hired a virtual assistant, particularly, to focus on this. If youād asked me in hindsight without sitting down and conducting a comprehensive review, what I was going to focus on in 2018, there is a good chance that affiliate marketing would have been left off the table, but when I saw so much affiliate income, and powerful affiliate partnerships emerging through my analysis of the past year, I knew that this had to become an area of my focus for the 12 months ahead.
Sit down and record all the different achievements, big and small, that you saw over the past year.
This will help you identify what projects you need to leave behind and perhaps those that deserve your focus as you go forward.
Many people move into the new year by holding themselves accountable for mistakes of the past. Itās much easier to remember all of the things we didnāt get done in the year behind us, in comparison with thinking about all the things we did on a day to day basis that truly helped to enhance our personal and our business lives.
Rely on an evidence list and keep it saved on your desktop to return to it often for a review.
The post Evaluating Your Previous Business Year to Figure Out What Worked and What Didnāt appeared first on Sweet Success Society.
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How Virtual Assistants Changed the Life of This Six-Figure Freelance Writer
As a freelance writer, my business initially started off being able to provide virtual assistant services and freelance writing content to other people. However, as my business grew quickly over the course of the past five years, I realized that I simply could not do everything on my own anymore, thus my introduction to the world of hiring virtual assistants to help me.
Since that time, Iāve trained and assisted hundreds of wannabe virtual assistants in launching their own careers. I have even helped provide matchmaking services to busy entrepreneurs who need help outsourcing some tasks. One of the common things I have found with successful business people, even entrepreneurs making six to seven figures in the online space, is that they struggle to identify what they need to delegate, how to hire that person, and what qualities to look for in outsourcing to a virtual assistant.
Thatās why I put together my tools all about how to hire and train your first VA. Having worked with dozens of virtual assistants directly and having trained hundreds more on the process, so that you get everything you need to know to begin delegating things and begin reclaiming your time and your ability to make more money.
Outsourcing to Virtual Assistants can HelpĀ you scale your business
Knowing how to outsource can uplevel your business in a major way- I know it has for mine!
My team has now expanded to five virtual assistants, all working from the comfort of their own homes, doing tasks they love. Outsourcing or even becoming a virtual assistant is really powerful these days and more popular than ever!
Working with virtual assistants has transformed my business such that I can have two businesses operating at the same time while keeping my mental clarity and focus on the most important tasks. This helps me accomplish many things on a regular basis and allows me to go on vacation and have it look as though my business is running just the same. If you are currently feeling bottlenecked or as though you are running out of hours during the day and simply cannot take on one more thing, you are in need of a virtual assistant.
You might have been holding back because you view it as an expense rather than as an investment or because you simply donāt know where to start. Check out this link to learn how to get a free list of 70+ tasks you can outsource to a VA.
The post How Virtual Assistants Changed the Life of This Six-Figure Freelance Writer appeared first on Sweet Success Society.
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Incorporating Negative Feedback from Clients into Your Business
No one wants to hear negative feedback. Trust me, Iām the last person who wants to get feedback from my clients if they arenāt happy about something. However, itās much easier to be open to receiving criticism when you know that you are not being attacked personally.
Now itās a whole different ball game altogether if a client has a track record of saying nasty comments to you, many of which are not founded in reality ā and trust me, Iāve been there with those types of clients too.Ā Thatās a great opportunity to cut and run and avoid interacting with the client ever again.
Take a step back before responding to negative feedback
However, if you have a client who, on the whole, has been pleased with your work and suddenly provides you with negative feedback, it can be a shock to your system to realize that something you spent a lot of time on was not received well. The first thing I encourage you to do if you receive negative feedback from a client is to take a step back. It can seem like a personal attack when you initially receive an email or another request to update some materials and being emotionally attached to the project yourself is not making things any easier.
In fact, you put yourself at higher risk of responding emotionally and making the client upset with how you have interpreted their comments. Read through the materials and then promise to revisit it a day later; thereās a much better chance youāll do so with a cool head and a better perspective on why the client feels this way.
Approach the Client feedback with an open mind
When youāve had a day to think it over, come back and review the materials. What seems fair in their assessment? Are some of the comments truthful? Could things be tightened up, cleaned up, better represented or more clear? Did you fail to follow some of the instructions? Being aware that someone has asked for revisions is simply part of the process when you are in a service-based business; not everyone is going to be thrilled with what you do all the time. Itās a bitter pill to swallow but itās one you should get used to.
Now Iām not saying that every client is going to throw you horrific feedback that is difficult to interpret. However, many clients will, at some point or another, have some feedback that you can incorporate. When you are of the mindset that they are simply trying to help you and achieve their target goal more effectively, you can respond with an open mind. The first thing I recommend you do when itās time to respond to the client is to thank them for their feedback and apologize for any honest mistakes you may have made.
If there was a miscommunication in the instructions, you can indicate this and note that perhaps you have updated your instructional materials to reflect their new request. This is a great way to build a bridge with the client and show that you take their concerns seriously. After you have made the necessary recommended changes, send over a new version and ask if it meets their specifications.
Thereās a good chance that if you completely interpreted everything they said after having a chance to sleep on it the first night, the client will be thrilled that you took such care to incorporate their feedback. Learning from the feedback experience is important because it better clarifies what your client needs and can also ensure that the materials you turn in in the future are better aligned with what they were looking for to begin with. Feedback doesnāt always have to be such a bad thing ā in fact, it can be a great opportunity for you to grow, to apply new lessons and to become even more of an expert in your chosen field.
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5 Self-Care Tips for Surviving the Holidays
The holidays and festivities are among us. Christmas music is playing in the malls, holiday displays line the streets of downtowns, and parades and festivities are in full-swing! As wonderful as the holidays are, they also come with their challenges. Self-care is incredibly important during this highly stressful, busy time of year. Here are five self-care tips and tricks you can implement into your routine to keep you sane this holiday season!
1. Find time to be with yourself
In the chaos of the holidays, it can sometimes be hard to find time to be alone. You might not even be seeing it as a priority at this time of year because thereās so much going on. As fun as all the festivities are, itās essential to find some alone time to recharge from all of it. This is especially important if youāre an introvert like myself, because you donāt want to burn yourself out! In addition to the value of recharging during alone time, spending time with yourself is always important for personal growth. This allows you to really reflect and get to know yourself, what you want, where you want to go, who you want to be, etc. This is incredibly valuable during any time of year!
2. Surround yourself with positivity
How many of you have friends or family members who just bring negativity into your life? And how many of you still go out of your way to spend time with them during the holidays? My mindset has shifted so much on this topic over the past couple of years. Iāve come to respect myself a lot more, and therefore Iāve realized I deserve to receive respect just as much as I give it. It doesnāt matter if that person is a family member or some random on the street, if theyāre not treating you with respect and positivity then you donāt need to engage in that. That being said, I know we all have family obligations to attend where a negative person might be there. In that case (because you donāt want to let the people who do treat you right down), just avoid talking to that person as much as possible. Put your shield up and donāt take any negative comments personally. In fact, let it go right past you and move on from it as quickly as possible. Have a positive person there to be your wingman/wingwoman and donāt let the haters get you down!
3. Indulge in the festivities
Hereās the thing about the holidays ā there is so much opportunity to participate in festive fun! Events like parades, Christmas markets, and toy drives can really get you in the festive spirit and uplift your spirits! Allow yourself to take a break from the stresses and just enjoy what the holidays are all about ā coming together as a community. Volunteer at a holiday event and feel like youāre making a difference in someoneās life. Attend community festivities and laugh and feel jolly. If youāre a Christian, attend Christmas Eve mass (not to get into religious chats here but I donāt consider myself to be overly religious and Iāve even enjoyed Christmas church festivities). Do something that makes you feel like youāre a part of your community and enjoy it! After all, what is a holiday if youāre not really taking the time to celebrate?
4. Slow Down and enjoy the little things
Life during the holiday season can often feel extremely rushed. Itās like living in a big city where everyone is always on the move. Slow down there, killer! Before you know it, the festive season will be over, so why not actually take it in and enjoy it while it lasts? Treat yourself to a holiday drink from Starbucks and really savour it. Browse through the local shops and take in the beautiful holiday displays that theyāve worked so hard to put together. Sit by the fire and enjoy your favourite holiday movies while snuggled up with loved ones. There are so many small moments that completely pass us by in the hustle and bustle, and theyāre moments that you canāt ever get back. The most beautiful memories come from enjoying the little things, and those are the moments youāll tell your kids and your grandkids about one day.
5. Plan everything but be flexible
Let me tell you what I know as someone who is obsessed with scheduling out everything. It is absolutely essential to have a plan for every event, budget, gift, date night, and everything else during the holidays. Those people who never have a plan, I donāt know how they survive. If youāre one of those people, please tell me your strategies! Having a plan and a schedule is essential if you want to stay on top of your scheduling and budgeting during the holidays. That being said, Iāve established that the holidays are absolute chaos sometimes. In order to balance this chaos, you need to have some flexibility in your plans. When creating your gifting budget, allow yourself some wiggle room. When making plans, be okay with the fact that plans might fall through (my birthday is six days before Christmas, Iām the queen of people cancelling on me because of the holidays but Iāve learned to structure things in a way that accommodates that). Plans might change unexpectedly, you might have a last minute event to go to, literally anything can happen. Be flexible with your time and your budget (but not too flexible as to make things crazy!).
The Takeaway
While chaotic, the holidays are a beautiful time to be enjoyed on your own and with family and friends. Whatever your holiday plans are, be sure to keep these self-care tips and trick in the back of your mind to help you not only to survive the holiday season, but really enjoy it!
What are your biggest self-care tips and tricks for surviving the holiday season? Let us know in the comments below! Also be sure to pick up your free holiday self-care checklist, which can be found in the free resource library (click the graphic below)!
The post 5 Self-Care Tips for Surviving the Holidays appeared first on Sweet Success Society.
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Your Guide to Banishing Burnout Before It Happens
Burnout is one of the most explosive things that can happen in your business and it can bring things to a sudden and screeching halt, as you watch your income dwindle to zero when you find yourself suddenly and unexplainably unable to do anything. Burnout is a serious conundrum in the online entrepreneur community today because we are constantly bombarded with advertisements promising the benefits of hustling 24/7, never giving up, taking on more and more projects etc. etc. etc. I have fallen victim to near burnout several times and have had to walk myself back from the edge of the cliff of feeling like I didnāt even want to be in business anymore.
In many cases, we bring ourselves to the brink of burnout and itās our own fault that we find ourselves in this situation. Weāre suddenly, completely and totally exhausted, both physically and emotionally. You feel like you donāt even want to show up to do anything within your business, and you find yourself not caring about the pertinent decisions that need to be made. Youāll find yourself on the edge of burnout, very suddenly. It might have been creeping up for weeks or months at a time, but there may come a day when you literally just canāt imagine doing one more thing or showing up to answer the emails in your inbox.
Your goal is to avoid this situation before it happens and walk yourself back from the brink of burnout, before you go in full on burnout mode. I canāt tell you how many successful entrepreneurs I have talked to who lament the loss of thousands of dollars or months spent building their business, because they had a complete breakdown and needed to take 100% of the time off. Iām talking very successful, multi-six figure and million dollar entrepreneurs, who just one day were unable to do it at all anymore. It took them 3-6 months or even longer to come back to being focused on their company. This could be detrimental to your physical and emotional health in addition to your family and your finances.
Identifying burnout early, before it gets to the point of exhaustion is extremely important because you could find yourself sick. The human body has a way of absorbing stress and workaholism up to a certain point, until it reaches a breaking point, at which you are no longer able to handle even the most minor of tasks. Signs that you may be feeling burned out include:
Youāre saying yes to every client who wants to work with you.
You find yourself wrapping up days late into the evening with plenty of items still on your to do list.
Youāve outsourced everything you can possibly think of, but still find yourself overwhelmed.
You suddenly find yourself getting sicker, developing colds or experiencing headaches that you didnāt before.
These are all early clues that you could be headed towards burnout. If youāre like me, you might be saved by another successful entrepreneur who virtually grabs you by the shoulders and says, āhey, if you donāt stop what youāre doing now, you are going to burnout and crash.ā This happened to me several months ago when I had my business causing me to work hour after hour after hour, in the midst of moving to a new town, setting up a new house, dealing with a difficult landlord, planning a wedding and handling the general responsibilities of life.
One of my mentors told me āIāve been there and Iāve lost over a hundred thousand dollars from burnout. Stop it before it gets there. End your smallest contracts immediately, outsource everything you can.ā
This is not about the money, this is about clearing your plate. Since then, I undertook a strategy to remove as much as possible from my plate by giving it to qualified team members, scaling back on the number of new materials or content being produced and simply keeping a smaller and leaner schedule. Working with a handful of clients on high volume projects, for example, means that I donāt have to divert my attention in too many different directions. I know what Iām responsible for every month. Yes, my income has gone down because of this but my stress level has also decreased. Being aware of burnout and recognizing that you are taking on too many projects or have taken on too many responsibilities is crucial. You need to tap into your support network as soon as possible. This could be virtual assistants, friends or family members. Any projects that you absolutely do not need to be working on, and I mean literally anything other than serious commitments that pay your bills, needs to be axed or handed off to someone else right away. You will feel a world of difference when you start to get things off your plate. It is very difficult to break up with clients in this situation or to trust your services ā the services youāve had a track record of providing to someone else.
But youāre saving your health in the meantime. Donāt push yourself to the point of burnout. I canāt tell you how many emails I get per week from experienced entrepreneurs who have all the way through a burnout and almost collapsed and had to file bankruptcy or close their business because of it. The sooner you can recognize that youāve got too much responsibility, the sooner you can take actual steps to stop it. If you are a person who tends towards burnout, be aware that you may not encounter it just once in your lifetime; it may come up again and again.
Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā The post Your Guide to Banishing Burnout Before It Happens appeared first on Sweet Success Society.
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Why Itās Totally Okay To Be In A Happy and Unmarried Relationship
Whew, weāve survived another wedding season! Now thereās a small window to recharge and safely scroll through our Facebook and Instagram feeds where apples and pumpkins, autumn leaves and warm blankets replace white gowns and sparkly rings. Until the holidays arrive and the next wave of engagement announcements come sure as sugar cookies and watching Elf.
Thatās not coming from bitterness, I promise. Like many of my fellow ladies, Iām in a happy, healthy relationship and weāve talked about marriage as much as heās diced onions for me. In other words, pretty regularly. We know with our whole hearts that we want to spend the rest of our lives together and start a family. We know what our first song as husband and wife will be and we like to brainstorm possible wedding venues. We discuss where we envision raising our children and how weāre going to coordinate holiday get-togethers with our families.
We donāt need a ring to talk about our future togetherāor, even more so, be taken seriously for whatās to come.
But thereās this underlying pressure in our society that if thereās no ring on the finger, thereās no āguaranteeā of a future together. Sure, long-term partnerships without marriage are increasingly more prominent, but thatās not going to stop everyone and their mother from asking you, āSo, are you next?ā
I donāt know, am I? Is that your way of asking if weāve discussed marriage and are serious about it, or are you just hoping thereāll be a big party soon?
This question (or some variation of it) became part of peopleās greetings to my S.O. and I as soon as we hit the two-year marker. Weāre almost at three years and our answer hasnāt changedāexcept maybe that Iāve fallen even more in love with him as weāve continued growing and building our life together.
No matter how steadfast you and your significant other are in your choices about when to get married, itās hard not to doubt yourself even just the tiniest smidgen when another engagement announcement comes around, or you have to explain again to your great aunt at a family event why thereās no ring on your finger.
And hey, itās okay. Weāve all been there and felt that, we understand. Then we shake off that doubt and keeping enjoying life in our happy, healthy, unmarried relationship.
But if you need a little pick-me-up or something to nod your head to, I gotchu. Hold your head up high when Great Aunt Edna asks if youāre going to get married soon and smile to yourself. Sure, maybe things will be different at next yearās annual family event, but enjoy the phase you and your S.O. are in now. Hereās five reminders why itās okay to be happy and in a loving relationship with no ring on your finger:
1. Weddings are an effort to plan.Ā Not that Iāve had any experience planning my own, but Iāve seen up close how much effort they areāand thatās not even discussing the expenses. Even just thinking about a guest list gives me anxiety and Iām no designer, but I have a feeling Iāll try to be for a full year at some time. Nowās the time to relax and not have to worry about entertaining 150+ people in the foreseeable future.
2. If you both are happily together, then whatās the rush? I know, uber clichĆ©. But itās true. As long as youāre both on the same page and loving your lives together, the importance of the ātitlesā fade away. I realize this is subjective so take it for what you will, but a few extra months, even another year or 2 while you continue growing and building a life togetherāhow really different would that extra time be? In 5, 10 years will that super-serious-but-not-engaged time of your relationship not matter as much as the engaged part? Remember to soak in the little moments and live in the present with your partner, whichever phase youāre in.
3. Remember that your wedding is going to be one day. (Okay, a few more than that once you add the engagement celebration, bachelorette party, rehearsal dinner, honeymoon, etc.etc.ābut itās officially only one day.) Yes, rumor has it that your wedding day is going to be the best day of your life, but it doesnāt define your relationship. I repeat, it does not define your relationship. In the grand scheme of things, itās one day out of literally thousands spent together. Every dayās affections, support, laughter, and connection matter just as much as that one.
4. Itās no secret that weddings are expensive. The average wedding costs about $35,000 and honestly, Iād so much rather put that kind of money toward our future. Itās conflicting because yes, Iām going to want a beautiful awesome wedding, but I also want to get out of debt, move somewhere where we can settle, and generally be smart about our finances and future. Interesting how our generation has been hit hard with financial burdens andĀ simultaneouslyĀ upping the anty on wedding expectations.Ā It just so happens thousands of dollars toward a wedding could honestly be better well spent during this time in our lives. Itās not a fun truth, I admit, but weāre both upfront about how we want to manage our money, and a wedding doesnāt cut the top priorities list.
5. Hey, at least youāre not getting asked about when youāre going to have kids. Thatās a whole other topic you donāt have to think about yet, so enjoy it while it lasts.
Donāt let that ring (or lack thereof) define you, and be sure to hold back the eye rolls when youāre asked about marriage during the upcoming holidays. You and your S.O. are a team and you got this. You know you love each other and will spend your future together, and at the end of the day thatās all that really matters right now.
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Itās OK to change your mind, your path, and your passions
Weāre all trying to create our dream life, right? The dream career, dream relationship, dream house, dream bank account. Most of us spend a lot of time very focused on our path; we set goals every year, we journal, we read books, listen to podcasts, take courses, and visualize ourselves with that ideal job or business, that perfect partner, the financial freedom, the house. Once we kind of discover our passions and what we want aĀ lot of our life starts to revolve around the path to get what we want.
We put so much time and energy into reaching our dreams, that it can be really scary, shocking, and disheartening if we reach a point that weāre like āwhoa, maybe this isnāt actually what I wantā. It can feel like weāve wasted time or did something wrong or failed somehow. Believe me, I get it. Iāve always been the kind of person with a plan: I knew where I was going, and what my life was going to be like. I had a vision andĀ passions! I have spent so much time working towards what I want, visualizing myself in that life, and you know what happened when it started to fall into place? I was fucking miserable. I felt like a failure because when the things I had always visualized actually started happening, instead of feeling happy, I felt incredibly stressed, overwhelmed, and exhausted. I was forcing myself to do the work that I thought was my passion and it didnāt feel easy, fun, or inspired. So WTF?
The thing is, the vision I had twenty, ten, or even five years ago was the vision of the person I was at that time. Iām about to turn 30, and Iāve changed more than I ever thought possible. The person I am now is so radically different from the person I was, so why would I expect my dreams, goals, and vision to stay the same? We get so attached to our āpathā that itās really hard to get off of it. For me, I felt like diverting from my path meant I was giving up or quitting, and I didnāt want to be someone who would give up on her dreams. But really, that path had just been a place for me to learn and grow, and deciding to go on a different path wasnāt quittingā¦.it was just changing my mind, which is completely 100% okay. Realizing that my plan just wasnāt serving me anymore was a massive weight off my shoulders, and allowing myself to āquitā certain aspects of my dream life and refocus feels really, really good.
Whatever your goals and dreams are for your best life, just know that over the years as you change, that might change too. And thatās totally cool. Itās great actually. You can have 30 dream jobs, 10 dream businesses, live in 100 different cities, go in and out of relationships, drive different cars, backpack for a year then decide you want to live in a cushy condo with a personal assistantā¦..quitting isnāt failing, itās brave. If you have the confidence to know, feel, and decide that something just isnāt right for you anymore and be OK with that, then youāre on the right track.
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Every Boss Babe Needs a Mentor: Hereās Why and How to Find Them
Iāve probably had a mentor since I was about 11-years-old. Granted, my mentor when I was a kid played a far different role than my current mentors do in my life. Regardless, the fact remains the same. Mentorship has been integral to my upbringing and development as a human being. I would not be where I am today without said mentorsā help along the way. Hereās why having a mentor is integral to your personal development and how to find them.
Why you need a mentor
1. people learn through observation
How many times have you seen someone doing something really cool, and thought to yourself āman, I never would have thought to do it that way, thatās a great ideaā. Odds are that you probably tried to implement whatever that was into your own lifestyle. Humans are observational beings and we like to learn from people we trust. A mentor is someone, maybe in your field of work or maybe just someone you look up to in life, that you can learn valuable lessons from. They are willing to teach you the ways that helped them reach another level of success. Itās a mutual understanding that they will help you grow as a person by observing their behaviour and techniques. By learning through observation, youāre able to develop those practical skills that youāll need to be successful in everyday life.
2. everyoneās experiences are unique and valuable
I truly believe that every single person on earth has something valuable to add to society. We have all lived different lives, therefore all of our perspectives are unique. No one person can possibly know everything there is to know. If you want to be successful, you need to be willing to acknowledge these differences in experiences. This is why having mentors is so valuable. They can show you another side of things based on their own experiences that you probably never would have thought about.
No one person can possibly know everything there is to know. Having a mentor fills knowledge gaps.
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3. learning is integral to success
One of the greatest stepping stones towards success is realizing and accepting that you can learn from others. If youāre hell-bent on doing everything yourself without any help, youāre holding yourself back from potentially amazing opportunities for growth. Having mentors allows you to fill that knowledge gap and honestly become a force to be reckoned with. Knowledge is power in this world, and itās one major thing that nobody can take away from you. You donāt know everything there is to know. There is no possible way you could ever know everything there is to know. This is what mentors are for, and even with a mentor youāll still have so much more to learn, and thatās okay! Learning is a lifelong process, and thatās exactly what you need to acknowledge if you want to be successful in any area of your life. It is absolutely key.
Knowledge is power. Itās one major thing that nobody can take away from you.
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How to find a mentor
Great, so you know that you need a mentor, but where the heck do you find one? Chances are that you already have! Did you go to school? All of those teachers were mentors helping you to prepare for the world. Have you ever had a job and found one person particularly helpful at helping you perform your duties adequately? That person was a workplace mentor for you. Are you reading this post? Iām currently mentoring you on why you need a mentor and how to find one (whoa, right?).
The point is that you can find mentors pretty much anywhere. My main mentors are family. My boyfriendās parents built a multi-million dollar company from the ground up. The knowledge theyāve given me as an entrepreneur has proven invaluable. Not only that, but they have incredible life values that have helped me grow immensely as a person. I also have an internship supervisor from when I was out east who I can phone up and have a chat with whenever, and Iām pretty sure heās psychic or something because his insight is always spot on. Even though Iām not working in that field anymore, I know that I can still count on him to be a mentor to me in other ways. And do you know what? Thatās just the beginning, because I also have the incredible team of ladies who help make this platform what it is, and theyāve been incredible mentors to me in this blogging journey. Mentors are everywhere ā you just need to be willing to seek them out!
Mentors are everywhere ā you just need to be willing to seek them out!
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The Takeaway
So, what have we learned? Mentorship will allow you not only to improve upon yourself but will provide you with a valuable connection who ideally will support you in your venture for the long-term. Mentorship is a unique experience that can absolutely change the way you go about different areas of life for the better. And the best part is that theyāre incredibly easy to find!
Who are your greatest mentors? What are the most valuable lessons youāve learned from them?
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Download the FREE Ultimate Hashtag Library (700+ Hashtags Sorted By Category and Popularity!)
Oh my goodness, we have something extra special to share with you today!
Iām so so excited to announce that our Ultimate Hashtag Library is now availableāfor FREE!
This is by no means your average hashtag list, my friends. Our team has put in some serious work to make it as positively amazing as possible.
You can access 25 pages of 700+ optimal hashtags. Theyāre sorted into 23 categories/niches and, best of all, weāve taken the time to pull the numbers and sort them by hashtag counts (aka, popularity rankings). You can visually and efficiently choose which hashtags are best suited for you and your audience.Ā You can actually be strategic about mixing and matching hashtags to grow your community, gain the most exposure and reach high engagement for each and every one of your Instagram photos.
Totally not playing the humble card here, but that is not your usual āultimate hashtag library.ā
Download the FREE Ultimate Hashtag Library!
We're SO excited to share the Ultimate Hashtag Library with you! It includes 700+ hashtags sorted into 23 categories and ranked by popularity... so yeah, you'll never have to worry about which 30 Instagram hashtags to use again.
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700+ Instagram Hashtags
Yes, I repeat more than 700 hashtags. Optimal hashtags that arenāt there ājust because,ā I promise. Weāve scoured the āGram in search of the classic favorites, beautiful brands, niche specific, regrammables, community focused, etc. etc.. Big and small, popular and kickstarting, obvious and eyebrow raisers. Youāll find a sprinkling of everything here in the Ultimate Hashtag Libraryāand the collection continues to grow with your feedback and new discoveries!
23 Categories/Niches
Have no fear, all those hastags are sorted into categories! They range from travel to home, blogging to fitness, fashion to creative, color to girlboss and entrepreneurs, and a whole bunch else in between.
Sorted by Hashtag Count/Popularity
Like I said, we pulled each hashtag count and sorted by popularity, so you have a better idea just how saturated/visible your Instagram photo may be. Play around with strategy to really grow your tribe and achieve higher engagementāthe Ultimate Hashtag Library makes it quick and easy with its rankings layout.
Hyperlinked Table of Contents
This library includes 700+ hashtags and while thatās so exciting, we understand itās also a lilā overwhelming. Thatās why thereās a hyperlinked Table of Contents! All you have to do is figure out which categories you want to include, click on the link in the Table of Contents, and youāll be directed straight to that category page. Not to mention, thereās a link right back to the Table of Contacts on every page footer because who has time to waste scrolling?
Never worry about IG hashtags w/ the FREE Ultimate Hashtag Library (700+ hashtags!)ā¦
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Follow along at @sweetsuccesssociety and join the #sweetsuccess tribe!
This Ultimate Hashtag Library is ever-growing (for instance, it began with 600 hashtags) and weāre always looking for your fresh suggestions and input! All updates will be uploaded within the Free Resource Library and donāt worry, weāll send you an email when itās time to download the latest version. Stay tuned for new categories/niches tooāummm, like the holidays that are just around the corner?!
So what are you waiting for?!
Change your Instahashtag game right now and access the Ultimate Hashtag Library!Ā ā¬ā¬
Download the FREE Ultimate Hashtag Library!
Never have to worry about Instagram hashtags again! The Ultimate Hashtag Library by Sweet Success Society has 700+ hashtags sorted into 23 categories and ranked by popularity.
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The post Download the FREE Ultimate Hashtag Library (700+ Hashtags Sorted By Category and Popularity!) appeared first on Sweet Success Society.
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Failure is Only Failure if You Donāt Learn From It
Weāve all heard the saying āfailure isnāt an optionā, right? Okay, now what if I told you that saying is complete bullshit? Youāve probably been hearing that your whole life much like I have. Chances are if youāre anything like me you got in trouble every time you failed at something. Whether it was poor grades in school or having a meltdown in public (hello, childhood anxiety) you were probably punished in some way.
If this wasnāt the case for you, consider yourself lucky because youāre probably a pretty well-adjusted human being. For those who have been taught from a young age that failure is bad, this oneās for you.
Failure isnāt only an option but a necessity
First of all, if you never fail, how are you supposed to learn valuable life lessons? How are you supposed to grow as a human being without making a few mistakes along the way? If everything went perfectly all the time, you would never learn anything, and thatās the bottom line.
Failure is a necessary part of personal growth, and the truth is if you want to really succeed and are chasing after something big, you need to be prepared to fail a few times along the way. Let there be no mistake in your mind that if you want success you need failure. This is a huge factor in entrepreneurship that scares the majority of people out of it. Society has trained us to hold ourselves back out of fear of failure, but imagine how much we might accomplish if we just let that fear go.
Aside from life or death situations, what is the worst thing that can happen when you fail at something? Think about something youāre afraid to do because youāre afraid of failing, and then ask yourself that question. Is it going to affect your life in a dramatic way? Are there solutions you can take should failure occur? Ask yourself what youāre so afraid of.Ā
learn from your failures
The biggest factor in deciding whether failure is a positive or negative experience is whether you decide to learn from it. One of my mentors told me that the most successful people fail 8 out of 10 times and use the lessons they learned those eight times to improve themselves and succeed those two times. Another mentor told me that doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result is a sign of insanity. Itās taken me a while to really process these messages, but Iāve found they ring true to my life.
As an entrepreneur, Iāve had to learn (and am still learning) how to cope with failure. The best method Iāve figured out is to learn from each experience. Really analyze each success and each failure. Why did it happen, and what can you do differently to improve for next time? If you donāt learn from each experience, youāre never going to grow. You need both failures and successes in order to truly become successful in any area of life.
The Takeaway
Donāt allow the world to scare you out of doing something because of the possibility of failure. Take it for what it is and use it to your advantage. See failure as an opportunity for growth and be persistent in your journey. If you take these steps in your process towards success in any area of life, youāre going to succeed. You donāt have to be perfect from the beginning. In fact, you donāt need to be perfect at any point in your journey. You just need to be willing to learn and develop into your best self.
Have you ever experienced a fear of failure? Where do you think it stems from for you and how are you working to overcome it? Let us know in the comments! And if you sign up for the free resource library (click the graphic above), you can access the āturn failure into opportunityā checklist to help you on this journey!
The post Failure is Only Failure if You Donāt Learn From It appeared first on Sweet Success Society.
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How to Recognize Your Excuses To Overcome Them
It seems like common sense and straightforward: In order to stop making excuses, you have to recognize that youāre making them in the first place. Excuses are excuses, right?
Youād think so. But time and time again, our minds play tricks on ourselves into thinking that, well, these excuses are far more important than they actually are. We tell ourselves that instead of excuses, theyāre REASONS. And there is a big difference between those two words, my friends.
You want to achieve this, that, and the otherādo something, go somewhere, be productive, develop healthy habits. Whatever it is, you feel the drive to make it happen and you anticipate to follow through. But thenā¦ you canāt.
Because of a reason or an excuse?
Reasons Vs. Excuses
Reasons give you a guilt-free out. Theyāre sound. Theyāre perfectly reasonable (duh, hence the name).
Excuses, on the other hand, are an effort to procrastinate. Theyāre there not because they need to be, but because you create them. In a way, reasons represent external preventions not to do somethingāmaybe you canāt go to that out-of-your-comfort-zone event because you already made plans. Or youāre genuinely not able to go on that run because of your injured leg. With reasons, thatās where you make an alternative decisionāshoot, you canāt go to this event because of these other plans you already have, but what about the next day or another similar event? Or you canāt go on that jog, but what about another form of exercise that doesnāt put pressure on your injured leg?
Meanwhile, excuses are almost entirely internal. Like I mentioned, we create them. You canāt go to the gym because you donāt have gym clothes, or eat healthy because you donāt have the right food in your fridge.
Really? Really? Come on, youāre better than that! Those arenāt reasons, thereās no way ācanātā is an honest word to throw into that sentence.
Okay, so why exactly am I breaking down the definitions of excuses and reasons? Weāre smart women, we understand the difference between the two words. But the thing is, there is so much power in our words and how we define our own behavior. Our ways of thinking make an important impact on our entire outlooks and, in turn, actions. If weāre able to sincerely recognize excuses for what they are, rather than labeling them as reasons and, therefore, feeling itās perfectly acceptable not to achieve something.
If weāre able to face what we originally set out to do and recognize that whatās preventing us from accomplishing it, no matter how big or small, is an excuse at its core, thereās for sure a higher likelihood of us saying, āScrew the excuses! Iām going to do it anyway.ā Thereās dignity in not doing something for a reason, but we suddenly feel a guilty conscious when we know that weāre creating an excuse. Which makes us more likely to do it, because in so many words, we know better. And since we know weāre better than being full of excuses, we kick our asses into gear and follow through. Boom! No more excuses and weāve achieved our goal.
Not gonna lie, I sometimes feel like the queen of excuses. Raise your hand if you feel similar?
I used to almost always call them reasons and stand by them with confidence. No, I couldnāt start my month of unlimited yoga because we had family coming to visit. I couldnāt finish the blog post because the Broncos were playing Thursday Night Football. I couldnāt make a healthy dinner because the chicken wasnāt defrosted. And on and on.
One day, my boyfriend finally pointed out that I was just making excuses for myself. While he spoke from a place of love, those words still stung. Me, make excuses? No way! They were logical reasons, and I launched into a defense. But that defense was suddenly a whole lot weaker than before, because deep down I realized that he was completely right. My defenses were just excuses, and I was masking them as reasons to make myself feel better for not following through. It was embarrassing, I admit it, but it had a significant impact moving forward.
Thereās always going to be excuses floating around, and sometimes we will seize on them. Sometimes theyāll make perfect sense and teeter on an excuse or a reason. You know what? Sometimes it is okay to choose the excuse over the action just for right now, because maybe the best thing for you is to take care of yourself in the moment.
But for the most part, what is stopping you?
Whatās stopping you from eating healthy, or going to the gym? Or spending an hour or two on your blog/online business after an exhausting day at your 9 to 5? Or reaching out to that one friend to make plans? The list is endlessāsome people go through their whole lives full to the brim of excuses. And then they look back and realize they really didnāt accomplish much at all. Donāt you know someone like that?
I know I have those weeks, monthsāhell, Iāve even gone through a few years where I look back with a cringe and admit that yes, that year was embarrassingly full of excuses. Instead of dwelling on the shame and excuses and wondering why the hell I did that to myself, itās essential to look forward. Yes, excuses are going to come up, plain and simple. But define them for the excuses that they are vs. the reasons you want them to be.
Take Control of Your Relationship with Excuses
When you plan to accomplish something and the time comes and youāre about to not do itāask yourself why. And when you answer that āwhyā question, ask yourself where that reasoning came from. Did you make it up? Seriously, think on it. Is there an external reason that you truly canāt do this, or did you kinda sorta make it up? Chances are, you conjured up that reason and whamāyou almost just let an excuse take over disguised as a reason. But you know better, and youāre not going to let the excuse win.
Recognize your excuses. OWN your excuses. And then dismiss them. Your life, your daily routine, your energy does not have time to listen to excuses. Theyāre not going anywhere, and itās best to understand and accept that excuses are part of life. Productive, successful, on-top-of-the-world individuals conjure up just as many excuses as the rest of us. They just acknowledge them as excuses, as opposed to external reasons, and push past. Itās a daily struggle, and youāll learn to recognize your pattern. Seriously, talk to yourself and have that conversation in your head. When a reason not to do something pops up in your mind and you cling to it, ask yourself why you arenāt going to do this or that. Oh, youāre tired? Is it really going to ruin your day to suck it up and push through?
(By all means, if the answer is yes, then proceed with the excuse. No one is going to stop you except yourself. But if you know better, if that bit of guilt is even a shadow in your deepest conscious, get the fuck up and smack that excuse away.)
Our relationships with our excuses play a large part in how we live our daily lives. Now is precisely the time to learn how you are going to recognize them for what they are, respond to them, and push past them. You are in control of your life. Not excusesānot even reasons.
Now go kick some ass, girl
The post How to Recognize Your Excuses To Overcome Them appeared first on Sweet Success Society.
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#GirlTalk: We Need to Stop Kink and Fetish Shaming People
Alright, ladies. Itās been a hot minute since weāve had some #GirlTalk on here. Letās get right into it.
We Need to Stop Kink and Fetish shaming people
To put this conversation into context, Iāll explain where Iām coming from. I actually would consider myself a fairly vanilla person in my sexual preferences. I have a couple of fantasies here and there as Iām sure many people do, but generally I find myself feeling fulfilled by just connecting with my partner on an intimate level ā I donāt really need all the bells and whistles to get me off, per se.
That being said, I do keep an open mind about kinks and fetishes and am not opposed to being experimental from time to time. Firstly, who am I to dictate what sexual acts are appropriate for others to enjoy? Second, how do I know whether somethingās enjoyable or not without having tried it? Iām fortunate that my partner and I are on similar grounds with our preferences and fantasies, but also know that differences should also be celebrated. Okay, so thatās where Iām coming from, now letās get into the facts.
What is a Kink?
Sandra LaMorgese, PhD wrote an article for Huffington Post describing the one key difference between being kinky and having a fetish. She describes a kink as āenhancing sexual intimacy with your partner by adding new and creative elements to sexā. She also mentions in the article that kinks can be ever changing depending on your situation at any given moment. Dr. LaMorgese uses a great example of people using whipped cream in bed. Generally when you hear about people doing this, itās often illustrated as a kink because itās enhancing the experience rather than being the focal point.
What is a Fetish?
In the same article, Dr. LaMorgese describes a fetish as a person being āsexually aroused by a specific object, body part, or role-play even without a partnerā. Itās generally more engrained in that personās psychological and physiological makeup. It would be a fetish if someone was sexually aroused by the whipped cream itself. Hopefully that helps to differentiate the two a little bit!
How Common are Sexual Kinks and Fetishes?
So you know that kinks and fetishes exist, but how common are they? The Journal of Sexual Medicine published an article in 2014 with some research data they found on the matter (obviously we donāt all have access to full scholarly journal articles, so I found the information here). Essentially, the results were broken into three different categories: rare fantasies (2.3% of the population), unusual fantasies (less than 16% of the population), and common/typical fantasies (50% or more of the population). You can head over and read the article if you want a full list of kinks/fetishes in each category. I will mention that some of the ones I found interesting that were among the most common were:
Having sex in an unusual place;
BDSM;
Having sex with multiple people; and
Watching someone undress without them knowing.
Those are just a few examples, but there are a lot more out there. The bottom line is that kinks and fetishes are a lot more common than you probably think. Your best friend could have a fetish and you might not even know!
How Can We Become More Accepting?
Hereās the thing. Chances are if itās not you or someone youāre having sex with, their kinks and fetishes arenāt affecting you in any way. Quite frankly, itās not your business what activities someone partakes in during their sexual endeavours. Thatās the first thing you need to realize if you ever hope to become more accepting.
When it starts to directly affect you is when a sexual partner shares a kink or fetish with you and when you have a kink or fetish yourself.
When Your Partner has a Kink/Fetish
First looking at it from the partner angle. When a partner shares a kink or fetish with you, you need to be aware that theyāre sharing something highly intimate about themselves. How you react is extremely important. If itās something thatās unusual or unheard of, you might feel a bit freaked out. Acknowledge that, know that your feelings are valid no matter what, and then put your game face on, because if you really care for this person you need to tread carefully.
What I would suggest is fuelling your curiosity rather than your shock. Ask questions and keep an open mind. That being said, also know that youāre not obligated to participate in anything that youāre not comfortable with.
When You have a Kink/Fetish
Now, what if you find yourself developing a kink or fetish? Iāve heard a number of stories where someone has had a kink or fetish that they arenāt particularly comfortable with. The fact of the matter is that it can be a tough situation when youāre struggling with yourself internally.
Because I donāt have this experience, I canāt offer you first hand advice specifically related to kinks or fetishes. I can, however, offer you advice on dealing with internal struggling. The first thing you need to do is acknowledge both sides ā the kink/fetish that arouses you and your feelings about that kink/fetish arousing you. Then you need to be kind to yourself and allow yourself to explore both ends. Why do you feel negatively about it? What about that kink/fetish turns you on? Really dig deep and do some self-exploration.
The Takeawayā¦
Kinks and fetishes are more common than most of us think. Therefore, why is this such a taboo topic? We need to become a more accepting society and celebrate the uniqueness residing within each of us. We can do that by realizing what affects us and what doesnāt. Curiosity rather than hatred should be our driving factor. Asking questions and being empathic are the best ways of moving towards acceptance. Knowledge is power!
Have you ever experienced kink/fantasy shaming on either end? How did it make you feel then? How do you feel now in hindsight? Let us know in the comments!
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Choosing Prices for Your Service-Based Business
If you are thinking about launching a service based business or you already have one and you have questions about pricing, you are not alone. When I first started my freelance writing business years ago, I had no idea what to charge for my services.
What follows are some of my top tips for identifying the right prices to charge in the outset or even as you grow your service based business.
Arming yourself with this material can increase your chances of success and make you speak more confidently when you are discussing prices with the potential client.
Investigate Your Competition
This might seem counter-intuitive, but investigating the competition and what they are charging will give you a general idea of the prices that the market will bear. You will find prices across the board including ones that seem well out of your reach and those that may seem underpaid.
Ideally you will investigate your competitors in this field and find a happy medium.
Consider Your Experience
If you have unique expertise or a track record of success in a particular field or unique education and training, you need to price yourself accordingly. An academic editor, who is in his or her final year of college, for example, likely wouldnāt charge the same hourly rate as a PhD.
Therefore, calculate your rate accordingly. Once again, it pays to check out your competition and see what other people with a similar background are charging.
Use the Time Method
I donāt recommend that service providers of any type begin to sell their hours indefinitely. It makes sense to charge an hours-based approach at the outset of your service based business, but you may ultimately wish to shift over to product packages instead.
However, when you are new to the field, using the hours-based approach allows you to keep track of all of the tiny work in a particular project and to get paid for it accordingly.
When you are new, you might not know how long it will take you to do a particular task, such as conducting somebodyās social media scheduling or writing a blog post.
Using the hours approach, will allow you to track your time and figure out whatās more feasible and this will serve you later as you raise your rates and shift away from the hourās method.
Consider the Value
Far too many people providing freelance services especially fail to communicate their value to potential clients.
While yes, the client is at the end of the day receiving some type of a service, that service and your ability to manage it as a true professional has the potential to pay off in spades for the business owner. Think of it this way: I write legal blogs for attorneys.
They are SEO optimized, therefore, the price that I charge per blog is not just an hourly rate based on how long it takes me to do it, but it also factors in my experience as mentioned above and the fact that that one blog or a series of blogs could be instrumental in bringing hundreds of thousands or even millions of dollars to my client.
Because it requires a special background to understand this type of writing and to carry out the research to ensure legal accuracy, my prices tend to be higher than other freelance writers in different niches.
This is just one example to help you realize all of the factors that go into pricing your services accordingly. One old adage says that if you choose a price and throw it out there and get immediate acceptance from many people with no push back at all, you have priced yourself too low.
A similar adage goes that if you are fully booked, itās time for you to raise your prices and if you have no clients at all, itās time for you to lower your prices. As with most things, there is a happy medium here that can be achieved in which youāre earning a valuable wage for your work and your client feels comfortable paying it. Keep all of these factors in mind as you consider how you can price services in your business.
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How to Deal with Overwhelm in Your Business
Owning a business is a rollercoaster and that means that in addition to the high highs you experience with zero G forces when you have an up day, you are also going to experience down points in your business.
I recently experienced one of these down points when taking on too much work.
I thought I could handle all of the responsibilities I had on my plate, but it turns out that I had simply booked in too many clients over the same three-week period and was struggling to keep up with deadlines.
In addition to the stress that is caused by a situation like this, you are also more likely to reconsider owning a business as a whole. You might start day dreaming of that day job or cutting back your hours. Use these pressure points of feeling overwhelmed to determine what you can change in the future.
What if Iām on Deadline?
If you are on deadline or have particular responsibilities you need to keep up with, I recommend continuing to push through the challenges at that particular point in time.
You can decide what you are going to do with your business after the fact, but if you have made promises to other people and have obligations that you must uphold, you must simply consider repeating a mantra such as āI have absolutely 100% got thisā and wading through them up one project at a time.
Being overwhelmed can also be an indication that you are no longer happy with your business, that you have far too many clients paying too little or that you have simply lost the passion and drive.
Now remember that every entrepreneur is going to go through ups and downs, so you are certainly not alone if you are having a down day and wondering about whether or not owning a business is still right for you.
If this persists over many weeks, however, this is a sign you should consider going a different direction with your business, such as focusing on a new project, cutting back your hours significantly, selling the business or other options.
Itās Okay to be Overwhelmed Every so Often
It can be very difficult to approach a subject like this and take it seriously, but remember that one or two days every so often when you are feeling frustrated and overwhelmed is not a sign of your complete failure. In fact, this is usually a time when experienced and professional entrepreneurs will push through the challenges and go to the next level.
If you have ever heard the saying that there is often a miracle right around the corner and many people give up right before it comes, keep this in mind when you are facing a difficult time in your business. If you are feeling overwhelmed, there are a couple of different tips I can recommend in order to help keep you on track. These include;
Having clear off hours for your business, such as the time when you turn your email inbox off and put your cellphone on airplane mode.
Communicating to any clients or anyone who will be affected by your slowed down or overwhelmed status. You donāt need to give them all the details about your personal life, but rather an expectation of when they should be able to hear from you or have their project complete.
Donāt forget to include self-care. It might seem counter intuitive that you actually need more time for yourself during a period when you feel overwhelmed, but it is absolutely true. Donāt neglect yourself in favor of trying to push through too many projects and simply burning yourself out.
Make notes of how much time you are spending doing particular tasks. This will make it easier for you if you need to outsource some tasks in the future or if you intend to scale back your business. Note which of those tasks you donāt enjoy doing because these are obvious candidates for outsourcing right away.
Experiencing overwhelm in your business is never easy, although it does get easier over time. Keeping in the back of your mind your big goals and the reason why you established a business in the first place can help you to reframe your perspective when you are confronting challenges.
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Why We Canāt Just Press Our Reset Button
Ahh, it feels so wonderful to be back on the blog!! This past week Erin and DaynnaĀ opened up about their successful mindset breakthroughs and journeys, and itās truly been so inspiring and uplifting that Iāve hardly thought of anything else since. (Watch their videos and see what all the buzz is about over on our Facebook page when you get the chance!)
With that said, I have to admit that sometimes I donāt even know where or how to begin my own storytelling process because Iām having difficulty forming my thoughts into written sentencesāor even stringing them into one cohesive thought to rally around a focus. A piece of writing with a message. Thatās when I recognize just how important it is to write it all out in order to come to an inner understanding. Itās always been my ground point of personal reflection; my kick starter to a regroup sesh with myself.
So please excuse me if todayās post is a little off the beaten path of what I typically discuss on Sweet Success Society. I honestly havenāt opened up like this with you before, but I feel like it should be shared because as I sat with my fingers hovering over the keyboard for days, it finally dawned on me that this feeling is part of life and definitely not uncommon. On the contrary, I bet itās more common than any of us would like to admitā¦ but we donāt want to talk about it, orāeven worseāadmit it to our audience.
Actually, let me rephrase that. We donāt like to admit it to our audience until we have a fully executed solution. Which I donāt have todayātoday, it seems all I have are comforting words that you arenāt alone. Iām not alone. Not much of a āhow-toā postā¦ more of an open dialogue with you lovelies. But hey, itās whatās been on my mind.
Have you ever said to yourself, āDamn, itās time to push the reset buttonā? Where you feel itās past due to get back on track with healthy eating, exercise, work productivity, connecting with loved onesāyou know, for anything (and everything) in life. You know youāre capable of it, but realize you need to give yourself that mental push into actual commitment and, subsequently, take fucking action (to put it bluntly).
Well, thatās exactly how I was feeling. I was so pumped up to āpress the reset buttonā and take dramatic action toward bettering my lifestyle and shaping it to be what I want and expect of it. So I started my favorite 30-Day Cleanse, rededicated to my own 4-Week Habits for Success Challenge, and had so much momentum to reorganize and align my life with my expectations for it.
Several weeks later, I looked back on this āresetā and my first thought was that I failed myself. I wasnāt consistently spending all the countless hours I intended in my new home office (that may be a floating desk under the stairs). I had a few cleanse cheat days from our travels in Sonoma and San Francisco, then a few more when my parents came to visit, and then a few more because, well, why not at this rate? I wasnāt exercising like I intended and even got out of the rhythm of yoga every evening before bed.
I beat myself up over not feeling like a rock star day in and day out. Which only made it worse because Iād see my confidence shrink as I retreated into the shadows. The days slipped into several weeks of hiding from my abandoned intentions and I questioned my ability to be more than justā¦ mediocre and going through the motions. Seriously guys, I felt ashamed that I wasnāt living by my own standards.
And yes, apparently I am that dramatic.
So maybe every day didnāt wrap up with me feeling like my own version of a rock star. Itās not like I was doing nothingāone of my prominent achievements was becoming more social again, which was an element drastically missing from my life until recently. Three months ago, I genuinely sobbed to my (rather confused) boyfriend about how lonely I felt without a solid group of girl friends. He lovingly told me to, essentially, do something about itāand, well, I did.
But despite that, I kept focusing on what was lacking and the promises I made myself that were so sincere before gradually hollowing out. The phrase, āLifeās a rollercoasterā is absurdly trueāand that absolutely goes for our mindsets in addition to lifeās circumstances. We have our brilliant, on-point times (our rock star phases), and then other times in which weāre a little more all over the place, or we place our accidentally focus on other aspects of life that arenāt aligned with our individual expectations of daily productivity and success.
Which brings me back to this magical reset button. When weāre not rock stars every day all day, we tell ourselves we need to make a change and immediately jump to the explanation that itās time for a reset. Iāve used the term pretty loosely for so long, and as I began to tell myself (again) that I need to just press it harder this time around, a big red flag went up.
Come on, Lexi, you know better than that.
As I reflected on what I have and have not accomplished recently, I came to the realization that itās not necessarily about āsetting a reset button.ā Improving ourselves does not happen overnight, as I knew before, so the hell was I using the word as if it was?
Instead of the concept of a āreset,ā perhaps itās more of a āregroup.ā Instead of stewing in our thoughts until we canāt take it anymore and mentally slam the button for a quick fix solutionā¦ itās that recognition of expanding our minds and breaking the circular pattern our thoughts are wrapped in.
Like what I consider my most destructive pattern. Iād open my computer andāliterallyāstare at it. The seconds became minutes, and without really knowing what to tackle first, Iād get lost in the familiar āfeed scroll.ā And thatās pretty much how it went for a few weeks.
Like for Sweet Success Society, the transformation weāve experienced as a team, as a business, and as a brand has really been inspiring. And to be honest, Iāve been a bit on the sidelines the past few weeks. When Iād open my computer and try to map out alllll the things that need to get done (because, hello, this is a fully functioning business and of course thereās always a million things to do, Iām preachinā to the choir!), I was getting lost in all the wrong things.
I needed to change my patterns, beginning with my mindset and how I approached the very things that I define as daily successful living. Thatās not a reset of the mind, itās a regroup.
As a whole, regrouping is figuring out how to go back to the basics. We get so stuck in the weeds of the overwhelming amount of tasks (big and small) that require our attention, simultaneously with the frantic feeling of āOH MY GOD THIS NEEDS TO GET DONE RIGHT NOW.ā
This past weekend, instead of diving into all the little details that I shoulda woulda coulda been working on over the past few weeks (in other words: catching up), I decided to focus on my mindset. Thatās where the real struggle comes in, and pretending it is actually about the tasks at hand is, to put it simply, a sneaky form of procrastination. I needed to nurture my mind. Take some time to regroup my thoughts, my actions, and my behaviors to transform them into a cohesive mindset that produces results. I had to kick my butt into productivity mode, and the first step was getting my mind organized, excited, and proactive before jumping head first into the sea of endless tasks.
So Iām breaking the pattern of the past few weeks with a few simple mix-ups. For instance, I listen to audiobooks on repeat out of comfort and decided that instead of re-listeningĀ Game of Thrones around the clock, to sneak in some TedTalks. So whatād I do? Download the app (umm, which is amazing and I highly recommend!) and add 86 TedTalks to my queue, and it didnāt require a grocery trip.
Iāve also felt so uninspired to stick with my usual healthy eating habits. As an effort to regroup with the healthy living, I took stock of our fridge and pantry and made a list of what was available to eat for breakfast, lunch, and dinner from what we have. I havenāt wondered what to eat for the next meal since.
Recognizing and acknowledging our setbacks is one thing, but actively making a difference to progress is quite another. Take a deep breath and remember everything is not going to change overnight, but it starts with that small act of setting yourself up for success. Get back on track by organizing your resources to give yourself that breathing room and ability to journey on up to the top of that rollercoaster again. Regrouping begins with the mindset gaining its confidence.
Hell, Iād even consider this blog post to be its own form of regrouping. I needed to go back the basics by simply getting back to writing and out of my head. Thatās what helps me best and I know that about myself.
Thank you for reading, loves!Ā ā¤ļø
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Back to School to Become the Ultimate Girl Boss: 10 Lessons Iāve Learned About Being an Entrepreneur
Whoa, hello there friends! Itās been a hot minute since Iāve written a post on here! Thanks for being patient with me while I worked out the logistics of balancing my life. Iām now back at school and although my workload is heavy I do actually have more free time to spend on writing stellar content, so thatās what Iām here to do!
As I said, this year I decided to go back to school for entrepreneurship at one of the colleges in Toronto. I just finished my first week and oh my goodness ā what a ride it has been! I literally went to school two days this week because of the holiday Monday (I only have classes Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday, hollaaaaa) and Iāve already learned so many amazingly applicable things that Iāll absolutely be implementing for my business, and some things that may not be as applicable to my business but still relevant nonetheless. Hereās the rundown from week one.
1. 5:00am wake up is the worst, but there are some positives to it!
Letās just get this out there into the world ā I am NOT a morning person. I hate waking up early and Iām at my most productive around 10:00pm-2:00am. Pretty sure I get that from my grandma, whoās in her mid-80s and still stays up till 2 every night! The point is, when I realized I had to get up at 5am in order to make the commute from the suburbs into the city for my 8am classes, I was not impressed in the slightest. Iām pretty sure the moment I realized this, I spent about 20 minutes ranting to my boyfriend on the phone about how society is catered to morning people and the world sucks ā very dramatic, I know (but is it not a little bit true though?).
When I actually had to do it this week though, I had an incredibly odd experience. I actually enjoyed being out and about before the sun came up! The actual waking up part was a struggle, thereās no fooling anyone there. But there were no cars, no people on sidewalks cutting me off, nothing like that. The train station I go to is also right on Lake Ontario, so I get a pretty nice view of the sunrise while waiting for my train!
Am I a fully transformed morning person? Absolutely not, I slept in till about 10:30 this morning and have no shame about it. However, do I think waking up early is much more doable than I originally had anticipated? When youāre excited about what youāre doing and want to get up and work and learn, absolutely!
2. Network, network, network ā and do it properly!
Ahh, networking. The dreaded word that our introverted sides absolutely cringe at. Girlfriend, if thatās you, just know Iām totally with you on that one. I love networking with other bloggers and such online, but when it comes to face-to-face actually talking to someone, I freeze. Iāve never been to a networking event for this reason, but all of that is about to changeā¦ thatās right, one of my assignments is actually to attend a networking event! First of all, terrifying, right? But second of all, how incredibly applicable that is! As someone who is generally quite shy, I need something like this to push me out of my comfort zone. You canāt get better at something without practice, so although Iām freaking out about it, Iām also so glad I can do it in the safety of being in school.
Something I learned about networking events this week is that a lot of people have the wrong idea for how to go about it. Many people think that if they leave at the end of the night and have run out of business cards they were successful at the event. As my HR prof pointed out though this week, this isnāt necessarily the case. If you leave without collecting any business cards from anyone else, how are you supposed to contact them? If they have your contact info and you donāt have theirs, who has the upper hand? That means the ball is in their court to contact you, which may or may not happen.
3. Know exactly whatās happening in your businessā Supply Chain Process
In my entrepreneurship program, I have to take a course called āsupply chain managementā. Do you think I knew what that was? Absolutely not! I thought it had to do with places like staples that supply items for other businesses, which yes it is, but itās so much more than that. Essentially, itās about the process of creating your product or service and all of the little steps involved. And when I say little, I mean EVERY LITTLE STEP. You used a piece of tape to package a box for shipment? Thatās part of the supply chain. You need a specific type of paper to create your journals? Again, thatās another part of it.
The reason itās important as a business owner to know everything about your supply chain process is so you can know exactly what amount of money is going into a product from beginning to end. This is relevant, of course, in figuring out how to make a profit while still keeping things at a reasonable price. I canāt go into super specific details, as itās only the first week, but I do know that itās important to have control of the finances in your business, which is why supply chain management is so important.
4. A Handshake is more than just a handshake
In one of my classes this week, we did one of those icebreaker introduce yourself exercises. Sounds pretty generic, right? It was, except our prof insisted that she needed to shake each of our hands in the process. Some people were pretty weirded out by it, while others like myself hardly noticed. Afterwards, however, she pointed out in a general sense that most of us had strong handshakes while others needed a lot of work. This was strange, as your handshake isnāt really something you tend to think much about in everyday life, but isnāt it so true that a handshake can tell a lot about a person during that small first impression window of meeting someone?
When shaking hands with someone, here are a couple of tips I learned during this exercise. A firm grip is preferable over one of those handshakes where someone holds out two fingers (isnāt that so awkward?! Omg Iāve had that happen to me a few too many times). Eye contact, squaring your shoulders with the person, and smiling are amongst other qualities of a good handshake that were mentioned.
5. It is absolutely possible to make friends as an adult
You guys! After the past year of having pretty much no one around except my boyfriend, I finally am developing somewhat of a girl group at school! Maybe Iām fangirling a bit too much about this, but itās so exciting to me to have a group of girls to eat lunch with and do group projects with ā we even have a WhatsApp group chat! And yes, I am in college again, so I suppose itās again one of those places that make it a bit easier to make friends, but it happened so organically that Iām not even sure college had a lot to do with it.
Weāre all entrepreneurs and weāre in the same class. But perhaps if we had met at a networking event or something like that we would have hit it off there too. The point is that Iām 23 years old and Iām starting to develop new friendships, so it is absolutely doable. Thatās a crazy exciting epiphany for me!
6. You need to be comfortable with criticism if youāre going to be successful as an entrepreneur
Criticism has always been like my arch nemesis, both giving and receiving. I have a very difficult time not taking things personally and I hate saying things to others that they might take personally. Itās a double edged sword. That being said, Iām fully aware of the importance of being able to handle giving and receiving criticism as an entrepreneur. There will be a day when I have to manage other employees. There will be a time even sooner when Iām pitching my business ideas to investors, who will absolutely tell me exactly what they think, what they like, and what they donāt like.
These concepts are terrifying. Luckily, Iām currently in college where my professors encourage us to practice in a safe space. Weāre required to work in a group not of our choosing and give in-person peer evaluations to each person in the group on a weekly basis. I was extremely uncomfortable with this activity at first, probably because I grew up in this millennial generation where teachers always sugar-coated things for us growing up (for instance, whenever Iāve had to do a peer-evaluation it was always written anonymously). But thatās not how the real world works. Thereās an entire generation of us who arenāt prepared to handle criticism, which is why I think activities like this are so important and relevant, especially within an entrepreneurial lifestyle.
7. Entrepreneurial traits for the most part can be learned
Thereās a lot of debate going around about whether the common traits of successful entrepreneurs can be learned or not. The verdict by professionals in the industry, however, is that for the most part these traits can be learned. This was interesting as I was among those who believe you either have what it takes or you donāt. Among some of the top traits successful entrepreneurs tend to possess are a tolerance for ambiguity, a drive to achieve success, persistence and perseverance, personable, and an ability to be a critical thinker.
8. We werenāt given strict deadlines in school for no reason
Have you ever actually thought about what deadlines mean in the real world? Maybe this is just me, but I never made the connection between our teachers giving us strict deadlines growing up and what that would teach us for when we step out into the workforce. I honestly thought they were just being hard-asses!
One of my profs used an example to explain this that really got me thinking. If a bakery owner takes an order for a cake to be ready for Saturday at 2pm for a little boyās birthday party, and then at 1:30 calls the mom who ordered the cake to tell her that she wonāt have it ready in time, what are the implications? Itās more than just a failing grade on a test. Itās a little boyās dream of having a Pikachu cake for his 5th birthday crushed! Now the mother has to run around last minute to find a grocery store cake which her kid may or may not like (you know how kids are lol).
Okay, so maybe itās not the end of the world. But those are real life implications impacting real people because that one person didnāt meet their deadline. It causes a lot of stress for everyone involved. In order for the world to function properly, we need to have discipline and we need to have deadlines. No matter how large or small the issue, we as entrepreneurs must make sure weāre setting and meeting deadlines. Otherwise our businesses arenāt going to succeed in the ways that we probably want them to.
9. Weāre not always going to like the people we work with and theyāre not always going to like us
Going back to the group I was assigned (which I donāt think has happened since I was like 14). Thereās a reason my prof assigned us groups to work with instead of allowing us to choose our groups. As an entrepreneur, itās likely that weāll have the opportunity to work with a wide variety of individuals, some of whom we may like and others of whom we wonāt so much. We need to learn to work with anyone, regardless of whether we want to be their best friend or not.
10. Iām finally excited about the path that Iām on!
This one is more personal, but it feels so great to finally be on the right path! Iām actually excited to wake up early in the morning and get to work on building my business. Thatās something I havenāt been able to say, like, ever. Itās been a long road, but I feel like Iāve finally found my passion, and itās an amazing feeling!
If you had told me a year ago that I would be this happy in a year, I would have laughed and then cried because thatās how shit things were at this time last year (pretty sure I had just gotten back from PEI after having a meltdown and loosing my housing so it wasnāt a good time to say the least). Every decision Iāve made up to this point has led me down this path, and I donāt have any regrets about either the good times or the hardships. Theyāve made me who I am today, and Iām proud to be that person.
The takeawayā¦
Overall, my first week at school was a successful one. Iām incredibly glad to have chosen an entrepreneurship college certificate. This is exactly what I need to get my business off the ground and learn important skills along the way.
What is your number one tip for entrepreneurs who are just starting out? Letās get a conversation started in the comments to support each other through this process. Iād love to hear your thoughts! Also, have you heard about our brand new membership? The Society is for the woman who is driven, ambitious and wants to find success in all areas of life. If this sounds like you, then you need to head over there to check it out! Weāre looking forward to having you join our fabulous community.
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Getting Value Out of Facebook Groups as a Business Owner
When you start any kind of venture in your online business, you need to make sure you have the time to manage it. All too often, I see people struggle to keep up with what they said they were going to do. (My hand is raised. Iām also guilty.)
Then what happens is you feel like a failure because you prepared your audience to hear from you in a certain way and then you were not able to keep up with it regularly.
If you think that a Facebook group is a great way to keep track of your audience and to engage with them on a regular basis, you are correct. The thing is that you must be prepared of how to accomplish these goals when you start a Facebook group and to ensure that it fits properly into your schedule.
One of the most common reasons that I have seen many Facebook pages close over the last several months is because the owner got overwhelmed. First of all, the owner would have to hire administrative help to assist with the management of the Facebook group. Then they would find that infighting and conflicts flooded through the Facebook group, making it a draining and difficult place to me. In order to avoid these kinds of challenges, you need to think about how to make the most out of Facebook groups as a business owner.
Both running your own Facebook group and appropriately networking in other groups is extremely important. In this first blog post, Iāll be focusing on how to make use of a Facebook group as the owner of one.
Consider Your Schedule
First of all, ensure that you have the appropriate time to commit to posting in the group regularly.
At least a few times a week, be ready to engage with your audience. You can learn a lot from the people in your Facebook group, but you must be prepared to do the work and ask them what they need the most assistance with.
This can provide critical guidance in future Facebook lives, posts that answer their questions or even products that you ultimately sell to them. Itās a good idea to book this into your schedule well in advance so that you remember to jump into the Facebook group and interact regularly.
Set Up the Rules in Advance
Secondly, make it clear exactly what members are responsible for doing. Are promotional posts allowed? Are they only allowed during a particular day? What kinds of behavior will lead to someone being kicked out of the group? These questions should be answered before you even start your Facebook group and should be included in the community guidelines. The third thing you need to do when launching a Facebook group is to think about how you will manage it as it grows. Where will you recruit people to join the Facebook group from? How will you encourage people to participate in the Facebook rather than simply joining it and forgetting about it?
Making the most of a Facebook group as a business owner requires that you give some type of value. This could be during weekly posts, sharing your podcasts or Facebook live videos, but you need some method for your audience to interact with you, such that they are encouraged to check into the group on a regular basis.
Pssstā¦ shameless plug here. Weāve got a Facebook group for the Sweet Success Society! Are you interested in connecting with other like-minded entrepreneurs? Check us out here!
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