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Executive dysfunction in a nutshell

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seriously? you’re telling me the fanfiction i meticulously planned out in my head doesn’t already exist and i have to write it myself? unbelievable.

#shooketh #i am so offended that i have to actually write it myself #preposterous

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one of the ways i know this culture has a massive issue with consent

is the sheer amount of people I’ve known that just lie & tell people they’re deathly allergic to foods they dislike

because otherwise people will hound them, mock them, coax them, harass them, try to force them to eat it, or even trick them into eating it, and they will never hear the end of it

your coworkers will bake it into a fucking pie, call it something else, and wait til your birthday, gather everyone and their first cousins to sit around in a circle waiting for you to put a forkful into your mouth and then point rhythmically at you in a chanting, glaring, sweating, unholy circle like SWISS CHARD SWISS CHARD YOU JUST ATE SWISS CHARD HA HA HA SWISS CHARD NOW YOU LIKE SWISS CHARD

Because forcing someone into a situation where they don’t feel safe declining putting something into their body they’d rather not be there is totes 100% wholesome American fun

And this is something so known that it’s infinitely easier to just lie and tell people that you’ll die if you eat that food…which actually doesn’t always stop it from happening

#i hate bananas #and my mom always tries to trick me into eating them by putting them secretly in smoothies and cinnamon rolls and shit #and i just dont trust anyone #so i will make my own fucking food and be pleased with it

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anyone else just kinda . put off hyperfixations. like yeah i haven’t seen/read/listened to that yet but i will soon and i will become obsessed with it just give me another couple weeks lol

#i do this so much lol #its literally what happened before i started good omens

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[thread]

I think it’s worth looking at why bad endings ruin stories. This will be a big rambling thread I’m gonna chip away at so feel free to mute if it’s not your cup of tea #storytalk

I was inspired to write this after @MagnoliaPearl posted something about the ending of Parks & Rec. Which was abysmal. To the point where when I rewatched the series, I stopped before the last season. It’s an ending that felt like a betrayal even though it was a “happy” one

You can’t just toss in good things happening to characters that they haven’t earned. Everyone can’t win the lottery in the last episode. That’s not a happy ending, it’s Deus ex machina that betrays all the things the characters actually struggled for

If you were to draw a story curve, in general a happy ending is one where the characters end up better than where they started but really not too much better. It really depends heavily on how wildly the rest of your graph swings during the rest of your book

Here’s an entertaining clip of Kurt Vonnegut explaining a little tongue in cheek bit about graphing stories that’s actually pretty helpful for explaining what I’m getting at

If you look at P&R that way, it’d probably look a little something like this. It’s easy enough to see where reality breaks

It’s a bit of an exaggeration but not much. The point is, you probably shouldn’t swing too far up from whatever was your highest point during the story. If your previous high was “couple gets married,” then “couple has baby” is a realistic ending. “Couple win lottery” maybe not

Actually, never have anyone win the lottery after the first act. Unless it’s an inciting incident that forms the foundation of the entire story…no lottery. That’s a good rule

But the thing that really got me thinking was why does it matter? The show is over, right? It’s not like I’m then forced to then watch a show about Leslie Knope being President. I think it matters for a few reasons and bear with me here cuz I’m making this up as I go…

One is what I’ll call the Evergreen Ending principle. Which is that even though the story has ended, you need to be able to imagine the characters are continuing to have similar adventures forever. That’s part of what makes an ending feel good, especially for serialized media

Obviously, things will be different because the Real Story already happened. But it needs to be easy to imagine how these characters go on doing essentially the same stuff forever. The only thing worse than the ending P&R gave us would be one where Leslie retires, for example

This is also why I hate epilogues. Like the ending of Harry Potter where they all old and have kids. Let the audience imagine what happens next. That part isn’t for the creator to say. Back off and let your audience take over

If you change too much, even for the better, you’ve also ruined any possibility of the Evergreen Ending. You’ve essentially created a whole new series where everything is different, which only works if you’re then planning to tell that new story

Bad endings can never be fixed. Every other story problem can potentially be resolved. Which I think is why those moments tend to pull back the curtain on a writer’s failings. It’s why writing endings is so stressful

But here’s what I think works. And this is obviously just my opinion and who the hell am I? But I think that when you reach the real end of your story, your plot should be on autopilot. If you’ve done your job, the story will just fly home itself

Don’t try to solve any more problems with plot. Unless you have a twist ending, accept that it’ll be a somewhat predictable finish and that’s okay. The only thing you need to tend to is the audience’s emotional needs. And have those needs reflect themselves in the characters

A real happy ending is knowing the characters are going to be okay. That they’ve finally found a little bit of balance and ended up better than they started. That who they are is good enough and always has been. And that they can handle whatever comes next.

#a real happy ending is knowing that the characters are going to be okay #damn #the really hit me hard #ugh i love this post

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me when i get tagged by mutuals: oh my GOD my friend noticed me,, omg my bestie in the world wide web, my beautiful wonderful amazing fren whom i cherish dearly, JUST NOTICED ME,, I AM ABOUT TO C O M B U S T

me when tagging mutuals: oh no... i hope im not annoying you.. or anything.. if you want I'll never tag you again.. only if you want tho.. if you don't want to be tagged then that's okay.. i love you.. pls don't hate me,,,

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Not me spiraling because I just realised the soundtrack that’s used in Arthur’s second proposal is The Bond of Sacrifice, aka The Music of Angst and Drama, aka The Serenade Which Arthur Dies To. I know this track is generally played in emotional scenes, but they can’t just use it for both events, and throw in these parallels–

–and expect me to be okay.

#well now im a hopeless heap of bones crying on the floor #who am i kidding i have always been a hopeless heap of bones

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Reblog if you’re totally fine with people coming into your ask box at any time and demanding WIP quotes

#kind of drowning in wips rn so i dont care hahaha #*very pained laughter*

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I call upon the fan fic writing gods to bless you with the perseverance to finish one of your unfinished drafts. 

May your fingers dance along the letters upon your device with ease, may the devil of distraction stay far from you, and may your work not need much editing.

I pass this blessing upon every fan fic writer out there.

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The moment they realised

#merthur #merlin #arthur pendragon #queue #okay so now i will never get over the way that arthur is looking at him in that last gif

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if you think you can just follow me and start talking to me as if we were friends well you are correct

#queue

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I want to prove a point to a coworker of mine.

Pretend this post is the coronavirus.

If you see this on your dash, just reblog it.

Let’s show them how quickly this virus can spread from just one person.

#well damn

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we make fun of thorin getting lost in the shire but you know the nazgul also had to keep asking for directions to find bag end so maybe hobbits’ city planning is just wack

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thinking about how an anonymous group (WHO DOESN’T SEEM TO BE AFFILIATED W/ SESAME STREET!!!) found out where jon armond lived and made him swear he wouldn’t show anyone cracks before they gave it to him

#why the actual heck am I looking at this at midnight

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Top 5 Doctor/Clara Moments 😁

*heavy breathing* this is so hard 😂. I've been asked this before and I think I answer something different every time too cause it depends on the day I guess

1. The "do you think I care so little" moment 😭 i just CANNOT. like helloooooo the doctor is just like yes you betrayed me in a moment of weakness but I love you and want whats best for you and I want you to be happy AND I DIE EVERY TIME I SEE THAT SCENE. its a Taylor Swift's Afterglow moment dammit.

2. The 4.5 billion years of torture and hell he went through for Clara. UGH

3. Any of there hugs. I'm not picky. Pick one. Okay but actually

This one. Or....

This one. Probs my top 2

4. Their banter. I mean, that's not an actual moment per se its just their entire relationship 😂

5. Just how adventurous and entirely reckless they were together. They'd go to the ends of the earth for each other and you can just sense how much they cared for each other. That's not a moment either but its the essence of their time together

Send me top 5 favorites asks

#yES THE HUGS :)) #i need to rewatch their episodes #i miss them #one of my favourite doctor & companion duos

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a comprehensive list of times the main cast of merlin gets thrown in camelot’s dungeons

Descending order by number of imprisonments. Italics represent any time they subsequently broke out/were broken out (or were released sneakily in the case of Lancelot).

Merlin: 7 1x01 for insulting Arthur 2x01 for fighting with Cedric/Cornelius Sigan 2x07 for sorcery (accused by Aredian) 2x09 for being suspected of harbouring Freya 3x03 for sorcery (specifically the Goblin’s various shenanigans) 3x10 for sorcery (confesses to enchanting Arthur and Gwen as Dragoon) 5x07 for being attempted regicide (accused by evil Gwen of poisoning Arthur)

Gwen: 2 1x03 for sorcery (supposedly healing her father) 3x10 for sorcery (supposedly enchanting Arthur)

Mordred: 2 1x08 for being a druid 5x11 for helping Kara

Gaius: 2 2x07 for sorcery (confesses to save Merlin) 4x12/13 for being loyal to Arthur (under Morgana)

Elyan: 2 4x10 for attempted regicide (under the influence of the druid boy) 4x12/13 for being loyal to Arthur (under Morgana)

Arthur: 1 1x04 for caring about Merlin/disobeying Uther

Lancelot: 1 1x05 for breaking the First Code

Morgana: 1 1x12 for treason (standing up to Uther about Tom)

Uther: 1 3x12/13 for being king (under Morgana and Morgause)

Leon: 1 3x13 for being loyal to Uther (under Morgana and Morgause)

Gwaine: 1 4x12/13 for being loyal to Arthur (under Morgana)