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Whoever invented "open in app" links that redirect you to the app store instead of actually opening the app even when you already have the app installed on your phone should be involuntarily turned into a beanbag chair

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This is the cutest thing I’ve ever seen

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Shocking how many people don’t know that hens lay non-fertilized eggs and think the yolk they’re eating is a baby chicken

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no matter how terrible my day is. i can always end my day in bed imagining fictional characters making out sloppy style and fucking raw. and that's beautiful. there's some good in this world mister frodo and it's worth fighting for

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codpiece

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#remember when we had to ask permission to go get a sip of water? #i think our schools limited our water on purpose so we wouldn’t want to go to the bathroom #i’m so thirsty all the time

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Stanislav Grand Canyon, Ukraine

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"there's something about the dying that feels familiar" fucking unbelievably metal thing to be told. you die and you could swear you've been here before. the last thing you feel before your breath leaves your body is intense deja vu. you've never died before but somehow you know how this goes. you have an uncanny feeling being dead is a temporary gig for you, but you have no idea what gives you that impression. and then you're alive again. and you remember dying. and all you remember is that there was something about it that felt familiar.

#the adventure zone #the adventure zone balance #taz #taz balance #eleventh hour

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Suddenly struck with a need to explain to you how boat pronouns work (I work in the marine industry).

When you're talking about the design of the boat, you say "it".

When the boat is still being built, your say "it".

When the boat is nearing completion, you can say "it" or "she".

When the boat is floating in the water you probably say "she", unless there is still a lot of work to be done (e.g. no engine yet) then you say "it".

When the boat is officially launched and operating, you say "she". If you continue to say "it" at this point you are not incorrect but suspiciously untraditional. You are not playing the game.

If you are referring to a boat you don't really know anything about you may say "it" ("there's a big boat, it's coming this way"). But if you know its name, it's probably "she" ("there's the Waverley, she's on her way to Greenock").

If you are talking about boats in general, you say "it" ("when a boat is hit by a wave it heels over")

If you speak about a boat in complimentary terms, it's "she" ("she's a grand boat"). If you are being disparaging it may be it, but not necessarily ("it's as ugly as sin", "she's a grotty old tub").

If she has a boy's name, she's still she. "Boy James", "King Edward", "Sir David Attenborough"? The pronoun is she.

If it's a dumb barge (no engine), you say it. But if it's a rowing boat (no engine), you say she.

I hope this has cleared things up so that you may not be in danger of misgendering floating objects.

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it's kind of problematic how some people are naked under their clothes, like, ummm ??? you're in public ?? 🤨

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My sister sent me this photo today with zero context and I laughed so hard I couldn’t breathe

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Maryland vs peta

FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT

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When you hear a new song on the radio and you’re desperately trying to pick a notable phrase so you can google it later

#was it weird al calling?