stardewboyhalo

[stardewboyhalo]

sam my boyfriend

[stardewboyhalo]

Seen some different interpretations of Sam’s eye color, so what do you guys think his eye color is?

Personally, I’m a green eyed Sam truther because I like green eyes and it’s funny to me that only Sebastian is the non-green eyed bachelor.

#big brown doe eyes #with lashes so long its unfair

[stardewboyhalo]

Yeah also this Pierre I need him whimpering too for charging me so much for some damn bean starter.

I need Pierre whimpering NEOOOOW

#stardew smut

[stardewboyhalo]

Guys, why is Alex kinda- *gently holds* 🥺

Ygwim?

[stardewboyhalo]

Ive seen a lot of people headcanon that Sebastian streams his programming job sometimes and I love that idea!

I was thinking what if he keeps streaming while you're married? I think he's the kind of guy to keep really private, someday the farmer will just show up in the background coming inside covered in dirt and he'll look at chat and go "Oh yeah that's my spouse they're great" and keep going without a second thought.

The farmer kind of becomes a meme in his chat and community in general. People start spamming when they walk in the house and you can see them in the background. Always doing something weird, sometimes they'll even walk over to the stream to put a frozen tear on the frozen tear pile on his desk and leave right after. They're weird but Sebastian loves them.

The audience doesn't know exactly what the farmer does, Sebastian only calls them his "spouse" but it's assumed they farm. Until one-day when he's doing a 2am stream and gets a knock at the door, instead of pausing the stream he rolls his eyes, gets up and goes to collect his unconscious, soot and grime coated spouse. He walks past the desk, clearly struggling to carry them out of frame and comes back a little later. He just looks at the camera with utter annoyance and says "Farmers amirite guys?" And keeps working.

I love cryptid farmer and streamer boy Sebastian ok

#sdv sebastian #sebastian x farmer #farmer sdv

[stardewboyhalo]

I love how Stardew Valley stops you from giving you from giving people more than two gifts a week, because I like to think that it's the Farmer's weird sense of social etiquette talking.

Wanna give Jodi a single small egg then walk away without saying a word? Go head. Feel like reaching into your pocket, pulling out a fistful of tree sap, and slapping it in Lewis's hands? Be my guest. Entering without knocking? That's a must. But giving them more than two gifts a week? Hold your horses, buckaroo, do you want people to think you're some kind of weirdo? Wait until it's their birthday or you're married before you start engaging in freakish behavior like that.

[stardewboyhalo]

Good timezone, how are you today?

SHANE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD JUST PUT A BABY IN ME

[stardewboyhalo]

r/tifu

I (36m) live in a small town. Everyone knows each other, and we don't often have new people moving in.

Well, recently, we had a new person move into town (they'll be called "The Farmer" from here on). They inherited a farm from their grandfather, who we all loved dearly. So far, they've been nothing but kind; they help everyone in town as best they can. They've even brought me some things I was looking for! We are very lucky that they joined our community.

This is where the problem starts.

I've had a thing for someone else in town (25f, let's call her "Emma") for quite some time. I'll be honest, I'm not the most confident person. I tend to look down on myself and have trouble initiating conversations. I've written notes to Emma that I've never had the guts to send. You know, typical nervous introvert nice guy stuff.

Well, I asked The Farmer if they wouldn't mind bringing Emma a piece of amethyst (one of her favorites) and let her know it was from me. They did that, but I think it may have backfired. When they told her it was from me, she seemed to not react how I thought she would. They gave it to her while she was at work (she is a bartender/waitress), I was sitting less than 20 feet away. She thought the gift was PURCHASED from my shop (I am the local blacksmith), and she kissed The Farmer! The Farmer just let it happen. It was absolutely embarrassing.

Since then, I haven't had the courage to say anything else to Emma, or The Farmer. I'm regretting asking the Farmer to give her the gift rather than delivering it myself. It seems like The Farmer has a crush on her now, which I had never gotten any signals about before.

Things in town have also felt off. Like nobody noticing my special shoes at a yearly local festival, when normally someone would compliment them.

Not sure where to go from here.

Tldr tifu by not shooting my shot with my crush when I had the chance to, in turn accidently setting her up with someone else in town.

#this was such a fun read slowly realizing whose perspective we were reading #clint would def have a reddit acc

[stardewboyhalo]

so this is joja IT guy turned farmer, Adam

#the most IT guy gone farmer ive ever seen #we support

[stardewboyhalo]

i want to kiss alex stardew valley so bad send post

[stardewboyhalo]

[stardewboyhalo]

What makes the farmer of Stardew Valley so... different?

What made the Junimos believe this twenty-something loser could be their saviour?

Why does everyone accept their behaviour, and choose to believe they're a friend when their behaviour is almost stalkerish?

Why did Mr Qi believe they were interesting enough to meet?

When anyone else visits the old community centre, they find an abondened building with rotted wood beams and plants growing through the floor, but when the Farmer explores, the spirits of a different world greet them at the door.

Everyone knows of these legendary fish, rumoured, but never seen. The Farmer can find them all with unnatural ease. Willy has worked in the fishing industry for his whole life and he only knew of their existence, and has not once been able to find one.

The explosive force of several kilos of dynamite should be enough to shred a person to pieces, but, it just knocks them around a little.

Aliens crash landed on his property. The witch cursed his farm, the skeletons cursed his luck. The fairies gave him blessings in return.

Why is it that when anyone else looks down, they see dirt, but when the Farmer looks, they find an ancient fossil of unknown origin? Why does regular food and drink change them at the atomic level?

Is it a blessing or a curse to be at the centre of the vortex, forever forced to play out century-old vendettas and be the change in a thousand lives? Wherever the farmer goes, the world moves with them, twisting itself around to curse and appease them as much as possible. Is the Farmer drawn to the supernatural, or is it the supernatural that finds the farmer so alluring?

And everywhere they go, Mr Qi watches, and waits.

[stardewboyhalo]

Alex & Haley

Have you ever had a fandom go so hard for an unconventional ship that you loop back around to the conventional ship as the more interesting one?

Like I want a good Haley and Alex.

I want them both on the same wavelength of dumb so they get each other when no one else does, and Haley is slightly smarter and translates shit for him.

And Haley is high maintenance but Alex will HAPPILY be her maintenance man because he worships her.

I know this doesn’t match Alex’s character canonically but lie to me and tell me this wouldn’t be fun.

#id read tf outta this #what do they talk about at the ice ream cart all day? #absolutely nothing and its the highlight of the summer

[stardewboyhalo]

I think they'd be great friends! :D

#OMG SAIKI K ON MY DASH #holy fuck holy fucking fuck

[stardewboyhalo]

deeply unpregnant behavior. bend over

#me when shane sdv

[stardewboyhalo]

Alex cals Kent his daddy when Kent fucks him mercilessly It's true guys conape told me himself

#alex sdv #kent sdv #i think itbwould fix them

[stardewboyhalo]

sorry for the lack of porn today i've been playing so much stardew. i'll try to get to asks tonight and tomorrow but unfortunately the need to wife up shane has taken over my mind

#dont let your dreams be dreams!!!! #make him your bitch!!!!