st4rrybear

[st4rrybear]

Incomplete list of the things the farmer can do:

Teleport

Talk to spirits

Summon rain

Fish all day without moving

Fight monsters

Make insane amounts of money

Give people perfect gifts without talking to them ever

Run at top speed, always

Read books in seconds (and eat them after)

Drink mayonnaise

Things the farmer cannot do:

Stay up after 2am

Dance

[st4rrybear]

• “La liberté guidant le peuple” by Eugène Delacroix

and

• “13th attempt to break the Gaza blockade by sea”. Photo by Mustafa Hassouna (Andalou Agency for Getty)

[st4rrybear]

“you’ve already seen a movie this week” oh i’m sorry stardew valley am i not the backbone of this fucking town? did i not single-handedly fix the community center, the bus, the boat, and whip up a movie theater on top of that? am i not shipping out thousands of dollars worth of material on the daily and killing monsters for you people? collecting whatever bullshit you ask for? bringing you gifts tailored to your preferences? and when i wish only to play the crane game and get a dinosaur egg you won’t even let me in the door to PAY YOU MONEY? unbelievable.

[st4rrybear]

the fact that Stardew Valley is a $15 indie game that came out almost a decade ago with zero microtransactions and is still receiving free DLC updates to this day is absolutely bonkers. There are $50-60 AAA games with paid DLC that have come out more recently and aren’t nearly as actively supported or updated.

[st4rrybear]

i accidentally napped and had a dream (nightmare?) where a new update for stardew valley released where everything was the same except on a random day in year 3 Evelyn would just straight up die. There was a whole cutscene that started in her house where she collapsed, and then transitioned over to the hospital where Harvey gave George and Alex the worst news of their lives. However, they got to speak to her where she said something along the lines of "Yoba will protect me, and I am sure he will let me watch over you."

Alex and George would not talk to the player for more than a few words for a full season after this event. George would spend most of his time in the bedroom, so if you had less than 2 hearts with him, you could barely ever speak to him.

And Alex... oh my god, poor Alex. If you were married to him during this event, he just stayed in bed all day. Otherwise, if single, he would just stand on the beach most of the time, staring off into the ocean. If you tried to interact with him, it would just say "Alex is grieving... Better leave him be."

There was also other NPC dialogue like mayor Lewis saying "I haven't seen the community in this state of mourning since your grandfather passed..."

there was also a glitch where you could make Evelyn live forever and there were entire guides for the "immortal Evelyn glitch" that got patched out in the next update. If you tried to perform the glitch after the patch, mr. Qi would tell you that "hey, it happens to all of us. We can't prevent it, and neither can you, no matter how hard you try."

[st4rrybear]

I’m going to unlearn shame *bursts into tears and beats my head against a brick wall*

[st4rrybear]

Please know that if you draw Harvey from Stardew Valley without his mustache, I hate you. Irrationally and without any hesitation. Just full hatred on sight and I will never forgive you for your crimes.

People who try to make him look “cooler” are on thin fucking ice. Him being a loser is a feature, not a bug. Either give my man the respect he deserves or leave him the fuck alone. 😡

[st4rrybear]

What if ......Harvey x oc who is prone to sickness

[st4rrybear]

i just know these three are autistic. personally i’m more of a harvey autism kinda gal but it can fluctuate between all three depending on the day.

[st4rrybear]

Thank you hozier and that artist for the influx in Harvey fanart

[st4rrybear]

It's gonna be such a funny mess when Donald Trump dies of a stroke on April 1st, 2024.

Naturally everybody will think it's fake because of the date only to lose their minds (both positively and negatively based on their opinion of trump) when realizing it's real

There will be massive celebrations in the streets and on social media and lots of predictable "don't speak ill of the dead" discourse about those celebrations

Weird evangelicals will pull some weird number trick talking about how Jesus was conceived on April 1st and that makes Trump a sort of messiah and people will make fun of that

The Republicans (after they're done with the faux-sadness and faux-outrage) will stomp over each other to be his successor but none of them will succeed. They'll tear each other apart and have no single nominee for the November elections.

There will be discourse about if Biden and the living former presidents should go to his funeral (they won't, he was a traitor insurrectionist)

The Ukraine-Russia War immediately goes in favor of Ukraine as morale in the Kremlin is reduced. China similarly backs off from its threats on Taiwan.

Ten thousand new memes are made, some sticking around for years to come.

Not a month later a bunch of unofficial biographies of Trump hit the bookshelves, many with new details about just how awful he was.

[st4rrybear]

milkman nation rise up ‼️‼️‼️

[st4rrybear]

save a cow milk the milkman

[st4rrybear]

Stardew Valley fans are basically little kids who excitedly got up at 3am on Christmas morning, but now they have to wait for Dad to wake up to open gifts.

[st4rrybear]

i feel so awful about the piled up asks in my inbox :( ik i don't owe y'all anything but idk there's weird guilt there

[st4rrybear]

i need him

[st4rrybear]

the urge to fall off the face of the internet