spookibab

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since mrs, ms, and mr are all descended from the latin word magister, i propose the gender neutral version should be mg, short for "mage"

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skull lace ♥

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There’s a plant called the “TomTato” which is a cherry tomato plant with potatoes as roots. It yields large quantities of both tomatoes and spuds.

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You wouldn’t think that flamingoes are extremophiles just from looking at them. It’s like somebody tried to build the vertebrate equivalent of that fungus that lives inside nuclear reactors, and ended up with a gangly pink dinosaur with a spoon for a face.

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You were my new dream. And you were mine.

TANGLED 2010, dir. Nathan Greno, Byron Howard.

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You think this is a joke? A JOKE? No, this is The native Finnish God of Love, Lempo. Demonic and monstrous, and capable of possessing people, driving them insane with love. Call him in with a right love spell and he’s more than happy to help you.

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My dad was telling me about something that he described as a “gun that put vaccines through my skin” when he was a kid and I looked it up and I think he’s talking about jet injectors

These things aren’t widely used anymore because if they’re not used correctly they can give some people infections but they used to be used in mass vaccinations.

Basically these things use pressure to get medication through your skin and into your fat and muscle layers underneath which… ouch but they work.

My dad says a couple of times during elementary school some med students and nurses showed up and they were all lined up on the playground and told to show their shoulders and the med students and nurses just locked and loaded these bad boys and pop pop pop pop pop a couple minutes later all the kids were vaccinated against whooping cough and they all went back to class with sore arms.

I don’t know why it’s funny to me. Probably because with the way my dad describes it he was clearly in that place when you’re a kid between like four and nine years old where something weird happens to you and you just move on from it. He was like seven and got hit with a vaccine gun with almost no explanation from the adults around him and went “okay well that was weird. Anyways, back to class.” Like wow. The weird shenanigans that you don’t think about till you’re well into adulthood. Like my dad is almost 60 and he’s just now remembering this now that all the covid vaccinations are going on.

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nice

nice

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fyi the point of fucking up your data patterns isnt to avoid suspicion. it’s to make EVERYONE suspicious. same logic as the bloc, pals.  protect your comrades, be suspicious. ESPECIALLY if you aren’t doing anything likely to get you arrested.

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KREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

I play a kenku artificer/rogue named KREE which she always screeches it. KREE doesn’t get along well with the Paladin nor Druid because KREE must steal all knick knacks, shinnies, and machine parts.  During our session we were traveling in the Underdark and we all got separated via bad dex saves. Our DM informed us we were all within 200 feet of each other though, so not too far away. 

KREE decides to explore to find shinnies while her team mates fight the underdark inhabitants (great stealth rolls for me!). When I came to a fork in the road I stopped. 

DM: You can go left or right. They’re perfectly identical, and both are eeireily quiet. You can’t see down either path far. 

Me: *grinning* Is there rocks on the ground?

DM: Uh, yeah?

Me: Perfect! KREE picks up a rock and using magical tinkering imbues that rock with a message. 

DM: Ok, what’s the message.

Me: KREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE *shrieked of course* 

DM: *Laughs* Now what.

Me: I throw it into the right tunnel. 

DM: You do that, nothing happens. 

Me: To the right tunnel! 

DM: Wait is it still screeching?

Me: IT will forever and ever unless I stop it. I choose not to. 

DM: *Laughing more* Alright you go throuhg the tunnel. 

Few turns later. 

DM: Alright, Paladin you walk up to a fork in the road. One side of the tunnel is screeching KREE for some reason. Good news, Kree likely when this way. Bad news, she attracted a few creatures with her screechign rock. Roll initiative. 

Paladin: God damnit Kree.

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@thesilentdreamreaper

*asking about the ranger’s familiar*

“What breed of danger noodle is Muffins?”

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Um, It Makes Total Sense We’re All Into Sea Shanties Now

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I’m going to save up for a new motorcycle by running a scam where I bet straight dudes at bars twenty bucks that I can get a girl’s number in under five minutes and then politely walk up her and say, “I just bet that asshole twenty bucks that I could get your number. I’ll split it with you if you pretend to laugh like I just said a good pick up line and then write a fake number on my hand.”

Like, I never understood those kind of bets in those shitty teen movies. Everybody loves being part of a scheme, man. Use your head.

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getting ready with the girrrlllss

part 1

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I have waited ALL FUCKING YEAR TO POST THIS

Santa is coming tonight.