smileyjily

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Hey. I just binge read The Bet. I honestly freaking loved it. Man especially the portrayal of James and the Marauders man.. You pretty much nailed the portrayal of the types of teenage boys they would be. From their attitudes to even some of the convos they have is so eerily accurate that I feel I myself have had similar interactions with friends. Recently Jily fanfics have been getting a lot better but I feel they seem to miss the mark with a good portrayal of James. He really doesnt feel like an accurate relatable teenage boy in so many of them. He is either written as an overly clueless dork who really does not behave like a popular teenage boy or a rom-com cliche "bad-boy" type. As a guy this really feels like a missed oppurtunity. But damn... you really nailed it. The certain level of calousness but a good heart underneath and of course the obsession with physical more than romance as boys tend to do. It is just so good. I feel like yours is more or less a definitive James Potter

thank you it's super lovely to hear that people are still discovering and connecting with this story 💖

i can't speak to newer portrayals of james as i haven't read jily in years, but i will say i always loved the different interpretations of him out there. what drew me to jily in the first place is we know so little about who they really were - most of our information is almost mythologized retellings or rumor - so it's really a writer's playground to decide who these people were. i had a lot of fun writing james' perspective. he's a funny guy, and i'm glad you liked it so much :)

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I miss the grindylows. If you don’t plan on coming back to it, do you mind saying what was the plan? Who were the grindylows after all?

only just logging in for the 1st time in a year so sorry for the dreadfully late response & sure i guess. i can't imagine ever returning at this point...

a lot of this is very character-driven so not sure it makes sense without but here's my best recollection of the mystery:

the grindylows have an initiation where you have to take veritaserum and confess your secrets. if you fail, your memory is erased.

that's why Remus is NOT a member. they wanted him, but he couldn't risk being exposed as a werewolf.

but also, if you remember back to early in the story when mei-lin and lily argued about lily not showing up for something and lily insisted she did...that's because lily was scouted for the grindylows. she just refused to take part in the ceremonies and got her memories erased!

of the big characters in the grindylows it's: james, sirius, mary, and emmeline BUT

emmeline is the leader. lots to say here about her and lily as foils and one of the big climactic beats of the story was going to be these two talking and resolving their issues with the truth on the table.

also not directly grindylows related, but one of the big mysteries of the story is about what's going on with sirius / james and the answer is that sirius murdered orion over the summer and james is worried he's going to self-destruct :)

so yeah. this story really got away from me in terms of what i was trying to juggle & also i kept retconning stuff. i think writing a mystery in installments is beyond my skill.

but hopefully this very late answer is satisfying to you!

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did you write the grindylows?

yes, i did :)

#and i stopped writing the grindylows because it was so ambitious #in scope and i started to get busy #and lost the story thread #i demanded perfection on that fic #and then failed over and over #and gave up

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Zendaya wearing Balmain at the 78th Venice International Film Festival 

Undine Rising from the Fountain by Chauncey Bradley Ives

The West Wind by Thomas Ridgeway Gould

#oh i love a reference #fashion

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That poor Ravenclaw never stood a chance; the Evans rage

(ask box is open - think ask got sent to wrong blog so posting like this)

#lily #james

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I laughed way too hard at this

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She did not promise to make it up to me, because there was no such possibility, and she did not say that everything would be all right, because it never would be.

Nghi Vo, The Empress of Salt and Fortune (Chapter 10)

#the empress of salt and fortune #books

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For Jily - “Please just look at me while I confess, after that you can look anywhere you like, I swear.”

Sirius Black has had enough.

Enough of James’ pining and whining and dramatic sighing. It’s embarrassing, but more than that, it’s just fucking annoying. He and everyone else in the entire school knows he’s in love with Lily. Everyone except for Lily.

Incidentally, Sirius has had enough of Lily too. Enough of her longing stares and painful, trying so hard to be nonchalant it actually hurts to witness questions. Everyone knows she’s in love with James too, except the idiot himself.

What’s worse is both of them refuse to admit it, not only to each other, but to everyone else too. So as he so often has to with friends this stupid, Sirius takes matters into his own hands.

“So you’re really not into Evans, right?” he asks James at breakfast one day.

James chokes on his coffee and coughs for a bit, eyes bugging a bit. But then, predictably, he says, “Um, yeah, no. Not at all. Why? Haven’t we been over this?”

Sirius smiles. “Oh, good. That’s what I was hoping to hear.”

James narrows his eyes. “Why?”

“Just, you know. You’re so unbearable when you have a crush.”

James does not look convinced, but Sirius decides it’s time to shift the conversation to the match coming up this weekend, and so it’s forgotten.

Until dinner. They head over to their usual spot at the end of the Gryffindor table, but Sirius jogs ahead and slips into the seat next to Lily before James has a chance. Both of them look a bit surprised, but neither comments.

“This colour looks really pretty on you, Lily,” Sirius says casually. He only notices what colour she’s wearing after he says it – a nice baby blue, so at least it wasn’t a blatant lie. Lily looks a bit taken aback, but she smiles at him.

“Thanks! I like it too.”

Deciding to play it up a bit, Sirius flits his fingers over the material from her shoulder to her upper arm. Then he makes a show of freezing, as if just realizing what he’s doing, and abruptly drops his hand. “It’s… yeah. It’s pretty.”

It takes a great deal of effort not to snort with laughter at the look on James’ face, like he can’t decide between looking suspicious or scandalized.

Sirius keeps it up for a good few days. He compliments Lily and finds excuses for innocent touches – imaginary lint on her sweater, hands brushing in the corridor, reaching for the same items at the table. All in while James is there to see, of course. It all kind of makes him want to gag if he’s honest, but it’s a necessary evil, because he can see them starting to crack.

James becomes snappy and irritable around him, and he has no excuses when Sirius innocently asks why – after all, he hasn’t done anything wrong, has he? He even had the good grace to confirm again and again that James did not fancy Lily.

Lily becomes nervous around him and tries to avoid him, tries to laugh off his flirting when she can’t – and Sirius lays it on thick. It’s all a credit to his immense talent as an actor that she doesn’t just laugh in his face – he’d done a great job of pretending to be hurt the first time she does.

He finally gets a chance to end it all for good when he gets paired with Lily for a Potions assignment. That evening when James announces that he’s off to the library to work on his own assignments, Sirius waits twenty minutes and then he rushes down to the common room and scans the room for Lily. She’s sitting on the ground at one of the tables by the fire, books and parchments spread out in front of her.

“Hey, are you busy right now?” he asks when he walks over.

Lily jumps a bit and glances up from her books. “Um, a bit. I was just working on the Transfig assignment.”

“I thought we could head to the library to start on research for the Potions assignment,” Sirius suggests. “I’ll be busy with Quidditch this week, it would be good to get started early.”

Lily chews on her lip, looking like she wants to refuse. But in the end she just nods. Sirius surreptitiously studies the map while Lily packs up her stuff, and deduces that James is sitting at their usual table in the back right corner of the library. He makes a show of acting jittery and nervous while they walk, brushing it off with a shaky laugh when Lily asks if he’s okay.

Sirius pretends to consider which table they should sit at, before leading them to the table on the other side of the shelf from the one James is at. He knows James will be able to hear them, they’ve spent many hours eavesdropping while they studied in that spot.

Sirius scours the shelves and picks out some good books, and then he actually works with Lily for a bit – eventually they’ll have to work on the assignment for real anyways, he may as well multitask. But not long into their work, he straightens up and fixes Lily with a serious look.

“Lily, I have to tell you something.”

Lily jumps slightly and glances up at him. “Is it important? I’m in the middle of reading.”

“Yeah, it’s very important. I’ve been holding it in for a long time, and I just can’t anymore.”

On the other side of the shelf, he hears a chair scraping back. Sirius bites the inside of his cheek to stop his lips from twitching into a smile. He has to keep acting nervous.

“I... um, maybe you shouldn’t,” Lily says quietly.

“Why not? I know James used to fancy you, but he told me he doesn’t anymore. There’s nothing to worry about.”

Lily’s eyes widen just slightly, but she doesn’t look surprised that the conversation has lead them here. She gives Sirius an almost pitying look, and he barely stops the eyeroll. As if.

“I really can’t hold it in anymore,” Sirius says, as if the words pain him. Lily swallows and looks away. Looks at her notes, at the shelves of books next to her, at the ground, everywhere but at him.

“Sirius, I really don’t think now’s the time. We should get back to work.”

“Do you know how hard it was keeping this from you both back when James fancied you? It was torture, Lily,” Sirius says with anguish. “And now I don’t have to anymore. I can tell you the truth.”

“Oh my God,” Lily whispers, panicked. “Please don’t, please don’t say anything.” She still won’t look at him.

“Lily, I have to do this. I have to do it for me, or I’ll go crazy,” Sirius insists. “I deserve to speak my truth. I’ve suffered in silence for long enough, don’t you think?”

“I don’t know what to do,” Lily whines, and she stares up at the ceiling. “Please kill me.”

“Please just look at me while I confess,” Sirius begs. “After that you can look anywhere you like, I swear.” She doesn’t, but Sirius soldiers on. “Lily, I’m in lo– ”

“You can’t!” Lily yells, lunging forward and slapping a hand over his mouth. A few people several tables down turn to look at them. “You can’t. I’m in love with James,” Lily admits, as if the words have been ripped from her throat, and she looks so anguished Sirius almost feels bad.

On the other side of the shelf, a very familiar voice yells “What?” and then there’s a commotion. It sounds like a chair gets knocked over and books flung off the table. James curses several times. Footsteps thunder down the aisle, and then James appears at the end of their own aisle, looking flushed and flustered. His hair is more disheveled than usual, as if he’d been tugging on it in distress.

Lily clears her throat and drops her hand, awkwardly patting Sirius’ cheek. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to smack you that hard.” And then it seems to catch up to her that James is there. James, who she has just confessed to being in love with.

Sirius sighs heavily and stands up. “Well, that was fucking miserable, but my work here is done.” He stretches and grabs his bag. “Enjoy your awkward conversation.” He pats Lily’s shoulder on his way past her, and then James’ when he reaches him.

“If you fuck this up after all my suffering, I’m going to murder you with my bare hands.”

#james #lily #sirius

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favorite character meme ♔ six outfits (2/6)

#the magicians

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James & Lily.

Song: [x]

#awww #james #lily

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One of the things I love most about this life is that there’s no final goodbye. You know, I’ve met hundreds of people out here and I don’t ever say a final goodbye. I always just say, “I’ll see you down the road”. And I do. And whether it’s a month, or a year, or sometimes years, I see them again.

Nomadland (2020) dir. Chloe Zhao

#nomadland

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the water lily pond by claude monet / “icu” by phoebe bridgers

#phoebe bridgers

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#the sopranos

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FKA twigs, photographed by Chad Kirkland for DEADLINE at the Sundance Film Festival 2019.

#fka twigs

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#female trouble

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Ivan the Terrible and His Son Ivan (1885) - Ilya Repin