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last night like 4am I still couldn’t sleep so I wrote a song while tired as death. will probably take this down tomorrow when better judgement sets in.

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i’m getting less and less able to tolerate tumblr/twitter posts that are like “adulthood is just [insert description of being brutally overworked and unable to tend to one’s home and basic needs]” like no…that’s not adulthood…..that’s capitalism. and you perpetuating its legitimacy with memes about how your suffering under capitalism is caused by your personal failure to ~adult~ correctly, or about how adulthood is just Like That, is not cute or funny.

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how many people could be working on actual problems in the world instead of being forced to do jobs that they are over-qualified for just because they dont want to go homeless and starve?

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Burnout is honestly such a mild word for what people use it to mean. I’m not experiencing “burnout”, which sounds so casual and routine that some face masks and a little rest is going to fix it.

My body and mind and even nervous system are stretched to the point that it’s going to take a lot more than just a “break” or a few self care tips to recover, and even then, my recovery is just so that I can reenter the spaces that contributed to me being this way in the first place. I’m a little bit more than just burnt out by this.

Workplaces and educational institutions aggressively overwork us, expose us to all kinds of discrimination, which they overlook and gaslight us out of acknowledging, and then constantly ask us to ignore our mental, emotional, and physical needs so that we don’t inconvenience them.

We’re not burnt out. We’re borderline traumatized. Burnout is always talked about like something transient and mild that a little rest and relaxation will fix.

But we’re exhausted. We need deep rest and healing. We need new systems. We need new ways of being. The language around burnout just seems like a way of upholding these current violent systems and downplaying their impacts.

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background practice that took on a life of its own

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reblog for easter

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it genuinely is important to acknowledge the role of pornography in fetishizing asian women’s entire existence specifically for the pleasure of white men, who then go out into the world and view asian women as objects for them to inflict their sexual desires and rage onto. asian countries are home to some of the highest prevalence of sex tourism, including child sex tourism, and southeast asia is still crippled by the sex trade that exploded during the vietnam war. the relationship between asia and the west, and also between asian westerners and white people, is defined by the sexual exploitation of and sexual violence toward asian women. within this country, asian women make up disproportionate shares of the domestic services industry, and frequently work in intimate service jobs such as nailcare and massages. that feeds that exploitation. my mom pointed out last night how anti-asian and anti-female bias in media was underscoring the decision to refer to the business in which these women were killed as “massage parlors,” which has the connotations of prostitution, rather than “day spas,” even though there was no indication that these businesses offered sexual services. its so pervasive

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"The good people are easily lead to believe that they are at fault for the things bad people use to victimize them"

Damn. Damn Damn Damn.

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call me ignorant but i genuinely don’t understand why sports have to be split up by gender.

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i’ve started replacing “i want to die” with “i feel overwhelmed” in my internal monologue, which is usually more accurate and more productive