shittysawtraps

[shittysawtraps]

Afraid you're missing out? There's no fear here at #SAWTheMusical ...except for the general fear that comes with sawing your leg off. This Saturday, we will be hosting a stream for the last weekend of SAN DIEGO shows! Link to buy tickets is coming VERY soon... make your choice and be on the lookout on our socials for the link. The tickets themselves will be going live on Friday 4/26/24 starting at MIDNIGHT #SAWRIGHTTHROUGH

[shittysawtraps]

Hello Mike. In front of you is an extremely complex device. This device must be operated incredibly precisely if you wish to avoid two massive hammers destroying your hands. Your instructions will be given to you the same way you instructed me while teaching me guitar, which is to say frustratingly vague and very likely to result in your failure. You have half an hour, most of which I intend to spend talking about myself and telling you that you need to chill. Sound familiar? Asshole.

#shitty saw traps #submission

[shittysawtraps]

Hello, Carl.

Whenever you come home from driving your car, you open the hood and let it run loudly for several minutes, no matter what time of day or night. Everyone who complains, you tell to eat a dick.

In front of you is a bull penis we got from the butcher shop. It was the most uncomfortable conversation any of us has had in a long time.

If you wish to leave this room alive, you have to eat the whole thing. The room you are in is filthy. The meat is raw. If you don't hurry, it might make you sick.

Should you give up, you'll simply die here. Or, you can swallow your words and live.

Make your choice.

#shitty saw traps #submission #genital mention

[shittysawtraps]

Hello SAMS fandom member, in front of you is a silly post joking about the family tree. Your job is to not use the word ‘mother’ when describing the male characters who had another character’s code in them at some point. You have 30 seconds or I will explode you

#shitty saw traps #submission

[shittysawtraps]

Hello, Hollow Knight fan.

If you mention Silksongs release date one more fucking time, I will kill you

#shitty saw traps #submission #hollow knight

[shittysawtraps]

#shitty saw traps #saw franchise #mod amanda #genuinely curious about this one #you gotta pick one

[shittysawtraps]

Hello, Detective Hoffman. I know you. I followed you, as you've pursued me. I know you. I know about your sister. I know about...your car.

#shitty saw traps #submission

[shittysawtraps]

Hello, Johnny Ghost.

In front of you is Spooker Soup. You must treat him decently for one mission and not take any opportunities to sacrifice him specifically for any reason.

If you fail to do so, you will seperated from Johnny Toast for a day.

[shittysawtraps]

Hello Charlie.

In front of you is one (1) frozen Philadelphia Cheese Steak flavored Hot Pocket. Your goal is to follow the provided cooking instructions using the 750-watt microwave on the wall beside you. Should you succeed, you will find the key to escape inside. Should you fail, the key will remain frozen inside the Hot Pocket.

You have six minutes to complete this task before the door locks permanently. Live or die. Make your choice.

#shitty saw traps #submission

[shittysawtraps]

Hello Fast and Furious Franchise...

We are too busy to watch Billy so we're hoping you can watch him. He has a tricycle and mad skills.

Thanks...

Dr. Gordon

#shitty saw traps #submission

[shittysawtraps]

just saw the post about in-universe saw forum roleplay and specifically mentioning sonic krazy kult made me holler so loud i LOVED that stream and also this is such a good idea if it ever happened that would be SO fun !!

if it happens, it will either go really well or rtvs will sue me and get custody of this blog in the settlement

#mod amanda #rtvs #saw franchise #i'm only doing it if i also get to make a sonic krazy kult esque youtube video where i read out all the posts in voices #for people to half-listen to while they're playing video games #which is probably going to be the source of the lawsuit bc that's exactly what rtvs did

[shittysawtraps]

Hello David Cage. I want to play a game. You wrote an allegory for the Civil Rights movement. In front of you is a computer. In the room is a shotgun that sets off fireworks through a megaphone. You must rewrite Markus' storyline. If your writing has the subtlety of a shotgun, the shotgun-fireworks will trigger, blowing you to smitherines. You have 40 minutes. Your time starts now.

#submission #shitty saw traps #dbh #detroit become human #david cage

[shittysawtraps]

Hello flat earther, in front of you is a physics textbook. You must read it and pass a physics test made for 11 year olds. If you fail you will be flattened by a steam roller

#submission #shitty saw traps

[shittysawtraps]

jigsaw copycat uses ai kramer voice but john doesn't know about ai so this triggers a massive crisis which ends with him gaslighting himself into thinking those were his traps, actually

-mod amanda

Do you think that a modern day Jigsaw copycat would use a really bad ai kramer voice

ABSOLUTELY. I need this movie immediately.

-Mod Sam

#mod amanda

[shittysawtraps]

A blade is coming down from the ceiling and you are tied to a table. Usual set up. To escape you have to guess my star sign in one try. I will only speak to you in the explanation.

#shitty saw traps #submission

[shittysawtraps]

Hello, Rube Goldberg. As you can see, the lever in front of you will pull a ramp up so the golf ball can roll down it where it will then fall into that suspended basket and weigh it down to press the button to release the tension in that spring which will bounce the razor blade upon it up to cut the string across the ceiling which will let loose a pendulum to fall down and barely brush past that match over there which will then light the fuse of the firework it's against which will launch out of that small hole in the room pulling the sickle attached to the back of it forward to cut the strand of copper wire string through its concavity which will break the circuit powering the room's lights which will make the sleeping bat hanging from that Newton Force Meter wake up and fly off which will let it spring back up and push a second pair of dominoes which will then

#shitty saw traps #submission

[shittysawtraps]

Do you think that a modern day Jigsaw copycat would use a really bad ai kramer voice

ABSOLUTELY. I need this movie immediately.

-Mod Sam

#shittysawasks #mod sam #not a trap