robotspiderrampage

[robotspiderrampage]

[robotspiderrampage]

im extremely cute but im MAD!!! AND FULL OF HELLFIRE ONLY REVOLUTION WILL DOUSE

[robotspiderrampage]

Of course I’m coughing up zero blood, Thaddeus. I’m messing with you. I don’t have fucking consumption. Sheesh.

Now, I have had a nosebleed I wasn't aware of yet and allergies at the same time and let me tell you... That is almost as alarming.

@robotspiderrampage this is another of your, ah, poetic exaggerations, right? You don't actually have consumption?

[robotspiderrampage]

Oh. You know. The usual amount.

@robotspiderrampage this is another of your, ah, poetic exaggerations, right? You don't actually have consumption?

[robotspiderrampage]

Not any more than usual.

@robotspiderrampage this is another of your, ah, poetic exaggerations, right? You don't actually have consumption?

[robotspiderrampage]

How would I blog if I'd fallen into a coma?

@robotspiderrampage this is another of your, ah, poetic exaggerations, right? You don't actually have consumption?

[robotspiderrampage]

*experiences romance once* augh… my delicate constitution… *develops consumptive fever and falls into a coma*

[robotspiderrampage]

DO YOU WANNA BE?

…Straf is definitely in the pit.

[robotspiderrampage]

YOU'RE GONNA WAKE THE GUARD.

…Straf is definitely in the pit.

[robotspiderrampage]

[grumble mutter] Gnomes aren’t lagomorphs... Butting into my privacy... >:[

…Straf is definitely in the pit.

[robotspiderrampage]

I AM, BUT I AM ALSO VERY TIRED OF WHATEVER THIS CONVERSATION IS.

…Straf is definitely in the pit.

[robotspiderrampage]

WHY ARE YOU LOOKING AT MY NIPPLES?!?!

MAYBE STOP LOOKING AT THEM AND LOOK FOR THE LIZARDMAN IF YOU’RE SO DAMN CURIOUS!!!

…Straf is definitely in the pit.

[robotspiderrampage]

No, you’re just saying that you hope I get on with the mating thing soon so you can, I don’t know, observe or something!!! Which is NOT FUCKING OKAY! >:[

And GNOMES DON’T HAVE LITTERS! WE HAVE CHILDREN ONE OR MAYBE TWO AT A TIME!!! LIKE MOST OTHER SPECIES!!! I-

Wait, when did he get a chance to drink enough to pass out? Is he gonna be okay?

…Straf is definitely in the pit.

[robotspiderrampage]

Look, I'm not the doctor here! I don't know average gestational times across all sentient species!

And it's not okay to make people your guinea pigs, especially when it's something as intimate as mating and without asking!

So let's get over this wall and away from discussions of my reproductive system!

…Straf is definitely in the pit.

[robotspiderrampage]

I’m pretty sure elves have the ability to smell! And do you really think he’s something nearly so pleasant? He’s probably soul-bonded to a corpse flower or something.

As for me, I- 

Thaddeus. Thaddeus, I’m pretty sure gnomes gestate for the normal amount of time. I don’t think-

God damnit, Thaddeus! I’m not a research topic! YOU DON’T GET TO RESEARCH MY MATING AND GESTATION HABITS, I’M A PERSON!

THIS IS STUPID, WE NEED TO GET A MOVE ON, ANYWAY!

…Straf is definitely in the pit.

[robotspiderrampage]

I highly doubt his tree is carrotwood.

…Straf is definitely in the pit.

[robotspiderrampage]

The Syracuse Journal, Kansas, Mach 23, 1906

#this is why I was homeschooled