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Graveyard Baby!
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01-09-21
In between all the flicks and flickers of light today I felt writing, writing another chapter of all the chapters just like you
All that you are listening to is not the descriptions of nature, roses and lilies
On the days of complete madness and inner chaos, I found a calm, serene affection, a tale not so familiar, a tenderness not so known
A comforting reassurance of possibilities
It's overwhelming and overpowering, the depths, the sincerity, the wisdom that you enunciate
Unfurling my palms to show you the lines I drew for myself
Comforting silence, stillness and warmth, energy not so familiar, a manner not so known
Places like these, I thought to write about in the dawn of music, all the chorus, symphony and harmony knocking the door
If I could hold the sunshine in my hand, I would give it to you
The softness of sunrise and steady blessings of stars are all for you
Instead writing a letter or a handwritten note, I choose the digital way, the route for future.
Releasing all the certain, uncertainties as I read and reread the praises, clasping not so familiar, saga not so known
To all the visible and invisible web of words as I speak to write, exciting me to believe the real and the fantasy holding their space in the presence of the liveliest soul..
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You can read a hundred books and learn nothing from them if you never take the time to work out, in your own head, the way the things you have read fit together.
Integrating the things you've read into a coherent whole takes *longer* than reading the thing, and it's much harder.
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I extensively remember my best birthday ever! Ever!😎 (in case you forgot let me remind you it's on 22nd April {even if you don't have to do anything}) Especially when I stood Independent, alone, and cheered for myself 🤪 Encouraged to get myself out of bed while my sisters playing 'Bar bar dil ye gaye tum jiyo hazaron saal.....' *In my head* -' I don't want to live for so many year's please God, let's settle it to 60-70' Distinctive!
Few friends did call I'm so glad they remember my name, yes seriously! Not leaving the ones who texted me on WhatsApp or Instagram, they are also crucial, at least I got a workout for my fingers, don't consider me mean, I mean it.
Saw a dream last night of an angel, the night on my birthday, how beautifully a glorious Lady touched my head, pure form of enlightenment leading to the same day my parent's showering blessings *felt similar*
All the factors leading it to a fantastic finale, the Grand finale! I'm alive and happily continue waiting for another one. *Blessed soul*
OMG I'm so a positive person😭♥
-From Me to me
I'm concluding 'Hi' from the other side ☺
2-6-21
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5/5/2021
Fiery and mending
Sleepless in the Silver city
How do you rhyme in crisis
That take so many and leave so little
Flickering embers of passing time
Our schools ask us to study
Our offices, to work
And yet, everyday we lose more hands and hearts
This is a test, our test
Will we come undone
Only Time will tell
Much as we never seem to have enough of it
Turn to your close ones
Hold them, sing, lend a ear
When lending a shoulder is prohibited
Lend your voice, comfort,
Healing is as much a warrior's act
As anything else
As the fire burns the candle,
It might burn your finger too
And yet, the light must come to pass
And it will.
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Flower addiction
India and it's flower obsession
One for the Fondness, One for Elegance
One for Marriage, One for the interiors
One of Propose, One for Birthday
One for Love, One for Books
One for Holy River, One for Death
One for Birthday, One for Celebrations
One for Home, One for Gardens
One for Hairs, One for Bun
One for the Dancer, One for Inauguration
One for Attar, One for Art
One for Recovery, One for Revenge
One for the Children, One for the Gods
One for the Gaze, One for the Bees
One for the Glory, One for the front pocked
Red, Yellow, White, Blue, Green, Pink, Purple
Which is your favourite one?
Oh! The flower you are here, there and everywhere entangled in the warmth of mother earth.
Marriage, Motherhood, Mathematics, Misfortune
The symbolism of each blossom, each season varying glory and treasure
What is so mysterious and magical about flowers?
For some, Single bud is a lot.
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03-04-2021
When I asked
When I asked you to assist me
Really wanted to say -
Be nearby me to hold, to care, to stay.
Preventing myself from smiling, it would seem imaginary to others.
When I asked you to drive me through
Really wanted to say-
You are always a better driver and a partner
Just to keep the phone aside for few hours, keep playing that music, your favourite one, when you sing I feel delighted.
When I asked you to cook
Really wanted to say -
Can I just watch you for a while, gaze those eyes, wondering the depth and charisma it carries.
Mind you, Chopping of vegetables was never the intent.
When I asked you to visit me for once
Really wanted to say-
Maybe I don't know what love is, can't describe what suffering is but at least now I know you'll not come.
When I asked you to spend some time
Really wanted to say-
Laughing on each other habit, sobbing while watching movies, cracking jokes while playing with Dog making him wear your glasses.
I sit on the couch just to watch you teach me a painting.
After all, Can I say -
This may not be the right time to express it, I'm not as good as you hope I'll be.
I'll stay in the office today, nobody to ask me to reach home.
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What do you say to lovers who fall apart
If not I'm sorry for your loss
If not an elegy for their end
What is beautiful is broken
And will not be mend
How do you mourn their fate
When it's too late to save them
Disguised at the heartless vanity
It's okay read it slowly
I can still infer spaces, contradictory emotions
When you want to conclude the right
A breeze or storm, none warned you
Doesn't matter, pull the traces and play fair
Even if you could not pronounce the cause
What's left behind is left for you
Don't erase them
Sound of barefoot on the ground is rare
Sing along the flower of hope in your heart.
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The greatness of Womankind
A Woman's heart is an ocean of secrets
Secrets none can drive into
Her eyes bear the weightiest burden
Burdens none can look into
Their sorrow is a forest fire
Raging through distant miles
Their joy is an amplifier
Bringing out the smiles
They can soothe away sorrows
With feminine tenderness
Their eyes can hide million sorrows
All women are poets inside
Her shoulders bear the weight of the world
The home, the hearth and the fire
Every object has a worth
Calculatable by mankind
Yet to this Fact is an exception
The greatness of womankind!
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27-12-'20
It's 4 P.M & I'm making my usual Masala Chai in the kitchen looking for a mug among my fav mugs.
Maa humbly calling if she can help in making, she has always been this kind, the kindest. giving me my space of the domain. I've constantly been like this, doing things on self.
Some days we do argue over silly little things, Always sharing my writing with her, her encouraging honest utterances are enough for me to go for it before sharing with the world.
She listens to every story I express, she remembers I make my own opinion under no influences and without biases. Giving attention to my Masala chai, appreciating with simple words full of optimistic energy makes my day.
It always comforts me to Align and not hustle. Asking me not to be harsh on myself.
Both the chai and Maa.
It is a different kind of love which can't be expressed in words. I penned it down to share my very special story of Chai and conversation with Maa.
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Waking up at 4 A.M, what you call this?
There was a sleep-deprived last night or day?
This 4 A.M mark is really troublesome, and not just about it
What should I do? no sunrise, no poetry mood, no reading, no writing, no podcast mood, no happy moment, what is this duration?
What happens during this period of 4 A.M in the darkness of so-called early morning light
Arrgghh! this nature of disturbance and disorder
Sense whispering - It makes you connect, recollect, rejoice, rethink, re-understand, relive those times.
Finding a right emotional balance that could perhaps decide and decode your life.
What a silence, what a peace
You think to have ample of sufficient time to gather yourself yet maybe gather more slumber, Go attempt it.
You need to do what you meant to be. Talking about slumber? Ugh no
The context is to do develop everything all at once in a day? Maybe you crave merely silence, stillness and hustle less life.
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The Future is no one's affair (21-12-'20)
No one is allowed to know her fate
Not you, not me, don't ask, don't hunt for explanations
Be patient with whatever comes
The central question of human life - morality, transcience, isolation and alienation, the question of suffering in all its directions
I know you want knowledge and see the oneness within
Of all that the God has shown me, I can speak just the smallest word
No worst, there is none, pitched past pitch of grief
Let me not thirst, nor beg with the domains in my pocket
This could be our last winter, there could be many more
Do what you must, be wise, time goes running as we talk.
Take the present, the future is no one's affair
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Nothing moves you
A mountain against an Unstable wind
You're immune to all
Move nothing and moved by nothing
Cracking of lightning with the heaviness of rain
Waves of storm booming in the sea while chuckling from distant you resisted
My calls for help fall off from your vacuum of ears
They meet you to lose you
A mountain against an unstable wind
Nothing moves you
You're immune to all
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