retrojeff3

[retrojeff3]

getting compliments about your energy is literally top tier

[retrojeff3]

March affirmations

✨ I attract the love I want

✨ My finances are growing

✨ My dreams are coming to life

[retrojeff3]

[retrojeff3]

[retrojeff3]

[retrojeff3]

[retrojeff3]

[retrojeff3]

eurydice - sarah ruhl

[retrojeff3]

we exist for love btw

[retrojeff3]

photos i made about grief

i took these photos while visiting my grandma after i went a month without seeing her due to covid restrictions, which was the longest i went without seeing her in my entire life. she has dementia and she hasn’t been doing the best since august. it’s been taking a toll on her mentally and seeing her be confused, forgetting things, struggling to form words/sentences at times and seeing her overall mental state has been really hard. some of the first things she said during the visit were “i’m sorry if you come here and i don’t remember who you are” and “i just want you to know how much of an honor it’s been to be your grandma.” she’s the only close family member i have left besides my mom (my grandpa and uncle passed away and i don’t have a dad, siblings, aunts/uncles, other grandparents or cousins) so seeing this happen gives me multiple types of grief. i grieve the loss of the person i once knew, her inevitable passing at some point in the future and the fact that her passing away will just mean that i’m even more alone, as far as family goes. my therapist has helped me identify that grief but it’s still a very harsh and sad reality. i knew i wanted to take some portraits of her when i visited her, but i didn’t really go into it with the concept of showing grief through photos.

her name is rose and my mom gave her the rose in the first photo for valentine’s day, so i wanted to use that for a photo and experimented with it as a foreground prop. all of these are candids besides the first one. the last two photos hold significance to me because she has parkinson’s, which makes her shake a lot and contributes to the dementia. i slowed down the shutter speed and captured her shaking while holding the rose, which is also supposed to represent the uncertainty of the situation we’ve been in since she had covid in august and started declining, and also the chaos of the situation.

anyways, thank you if you read all of this. i really want to start creating conceptual photos and photos that tell a story like this, as well as just more photo sets designed for tumblr like this one.

#photography #candid #portrait

[retrojeff3]

[retrojeff3]

[retrojeff3]

microdosing on being goth by wearing black jeans

[retrojeff3]

“I’m not everything I want to be, but I’m more than I was, and I’m still learning.”

— Charlotte Eriksson, Everything Changed When I Forgave Myself

[retrojeff3]

i was 13 or 14 and now i’m 21

wait ok now i'm curious how old were you when you joined tumblr and how old are you now

#tumblr

[retrojeff3]

i love when i “make a mental note” of something. it’s gone within 20 seconds

[retrojeff3]

too much love inside me disorder