Things my professors have said: chemistry edition, part 2
Because part 1 got a lot more popular than I thought and also my profs are hilarious <3
[part 1]
"ideal gases don't *actually* exist - nothing is ideal. Except chemists. Especially the ones in this classroom"
[looks at his own ppt slide in confusion] "where's Mr carbon?"
"what can we do when we have an integral of sum? Split it into sum of integrals! What can we do when we have an integral of difference? Split it into difference of integrals! What can we do when we have an integral of a product? Cry!"
"that's what trees use chemistry for: telling one another, 'Hey buddy! I'm being eaten by pests!'"
"we all know how soap is made. Has anyone here ever spilled sodium hydroxide on their hands by accident? [Me: I have. It felt like having soap on my fingers.] Yeah! Humans are kind of like soap!"
"cotton lab coats only! No synthetics! That way if your friend catches fire, you can put them out with your lab coat!"
i can say with full honesty that i’ve failed magnificently several times this year but only because i’ve finally started to put myself out there in little ways. once you hit a different level of trying (ie new extracurriculars work experience more responsibilities) you do start to see your flaws in far greater detail, which is disheartening, but– it really just means that you’re opening up more of yourself to the world and learning.
take a deep breath, go into the new year. we’re doing great.
“Many people seem to think it foolish, even superstitious, to believe that the world could still change for the better. And it is true that in winter it is sometimes so bitingly cold that one is tempted to say, ‘What do I care if there is a summer; its warmth is no help to me now.’ Yes, evil often seems to surpass good. But then, in spite of us, and without our permission, there comes at last an end to the bitter frosts. One morning the wind turns, and there is a thaw. And so I must still have hope.”
autistic people are allowed to fit autism stereotypes
i take things literally. i don’t get a lot of neurotypical humor and often feel left out of the joke or even feel like i’m the joke sometimes. i’m gullible. there’s no way to sugarcoat it or put it more nicely, i’m just gullible. i don’t always know what’s satire. i’m socially awkward and have a hard time befriending or remaining friends with anybody who isn’t like me.
much of the autism community puts so much emphasis on “all autistic people aren’t x” and not enough on “who cares if we’re x, we deserve rights”
this goes doubly for ID and nonspeaking autistics btw i just can’t speak to that experience personally