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Needed a clean graphic for a project, and figured while I was vectoring I would put sex and magic back in.

Happy Pride Month

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Referencing obscure Internet memes in mainstream media almost invariably falls flat, but if movie!Deadpool walked into the aftermath of a scene of gratuitous carnage and quipped "wow, it looks like a children's hospital in here" it would totally work. To those who don't catch the reference it would come off as generic edgy bullshit, and to those in the know, Deadpool having a Tumblr account is completely believable.

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I had a dream last night that tumblr came up with a pride flag for closeted gays and it was just a light blue flag with a shrimp on it. People would also wear shrimp pins on their lapels for some Reason???

and the vegan gays started Discourse because shrimp deserved more respect

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do u have advice on how not to hate ur body as a fat person?

these are all from my direct couple decades' experience in learning to make peace with and love my body, ymmv:

fuck other fat people

find things that make you happy with what your body can do for you -- dancing, hiking, bodypainting, weight lifting, anything that makes you feel connected to you body and gives you a sense of accomplishment. if it's a physical activity, don't do it for weight loss reasons, and don't do it if you hate doing it. this is something that should make you feel good in the moment

love other fat people

eat foods that make your body feel good and that give you energy, and eat foods that make you happy, and learn to cook them if you can. eat breakfast every single day (i'm still working on that but it helps, a lot)

don't weigh yourself, don't keep a mental model of your weight in your head. when you go in for check-ups, turn around on the scale (i do this and my nurses have all been really normal and respectful about it). stop thinking about your body as a set of numbers

find clothes that make you feel good in your body. go thrifting, or find good plus-sized stores or sections. don't look for "flattering" or "slimming" clothing -- look for cool shit, patterns you like, things that make you feel happy in your gender presentation, fun material, comfy fits, stuff you can be active in, stuff that makes you look sexy. there is a whole world of fashion for you if you can break out of the "your clothes should make you look thinner" shit that gets pushed on us

take pictures, and let others take pictures of you. even if you don't want to look at them right away, don't let yourself and your life be lost in the photo record because you were too embarrassed to be on camera. you'll thank yourself for it later

avoid diet culture shit like the plague. if somebody starts talking about the newest eating disorder diet and you can leave or change the subject, do so

fuck and love other fat people. pay attention to their bodies and the way weight falls differently on all of them, take note of what you love about their bodies, consider if it's anything you share

set hard boundaries with family, friends, and doctors. this one sucks to do but you HAVE to do it. if somebody talks about your body in a way that makes you feel unhappy or unsafe, make it clear to them that the conversation is over. and seriously, you can do this with doctors, too. tell people that you are happy with the shape and size of your body and that you will not entertain any discussions about changing it -- even if you don't feel happy with it at the moment, you will not learn to be happy in your body if you can't learn to stand up for it

in relationships, especially intimate ones, don't stand for being hidden. do not devote yourself to anyone who loves you despite your fatness, and insist on being adored publicly and proudly

seriously, surround yourself with people who love your body, whether sexually or platonically. seek out other fat people, and keep the thin people in you life accountable for treating you right. i clown on thin people on here but i have a lot of dearly loved thin friends who are good about this, who i know i can trust to listen if i call them out on shit, and who ultimately love me and the body i'm in

take any disordered eating symptoms really really seriously. the majority of fat people have experienced them to some extent, and this is generally ignored or downplayed because the face of ED is a skinny girl with "no reason" not to eat. if you're experiencing ED symptoms (severe food avoidance, treating meals as a "reward" or their removal as a punishment, purging, restriction, etc.), talk to someone you trust. i was not able to start loving my body until i stopped killing it like this

understand that you live in a deeply fatphobic culture, and that you and others have been raised to hate your body. it's going to feel very overwhelming at times, and you're going to find a lot of people who want your body to change -- that doesn't mean it needs to change, that doesn't mean it's wrong to love it. understand that you're going to be swimming against the current, and that it's going to be difficult. do it anyways. it's worth it.

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babe wake up new none pizza with left beef just dropped

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Having anotheg 'gork we have got to get out of bed faster then this' morning

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You actually do need noble lineage to rightfully rule, but since lineage doesn’t dilute, and given the historic sexual tendencies of people in power wrt their servants, eventually noble lineage spread wide enough that everyone had it and that’s why democracy happened.

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An Incomplete List of the Animals my Grandpa brought home over the course of his 67-year marriage to Gandma:

Annabell, a solid white and completely deaf pit bull that used to let mom draw on her belly

The World’s Ugliest Tom Cat, who turned out to be the cuddiest teddy bear of an animal

Cocker spaniel named “Captain”

Stupid, the Cat

Litter of baby raccoons

Three more cats

A completely bald and extremely anxious canary that sang beautifully, but only at 4 AM

Baby Squirrel that grew up in the house and then refused to move out

A Genuine Thoroughbred Racehorse who was a spectacular athelete but had a habit of running races in the wrong direction.  Benny turned out to be a terrific trail horse instead.

Turtle

Snapping Turtle

A bucket full of 43 goldfish left over from the fair.  Mom counted once they were all in the bathtub in the backyard with the snapping turtle.

Another cocker spaniel named “Major”, who had the tremendous talent of eating green beans silently

Red-tailed hawk he found on the highway, and sucessfully nursed back to health and released.

Dummy, Son of Stupid

Strange, the dog that lived under the porch and only came into the house at night.

An “abandoned” baby deer.

Spooky, an alleged dog.  

Joey the parakeet whose tricks were  1. drinking tea out of a tiny cup 2. threatening to peck out people’s eyes 3. wearing hats

A Really Big Toad he found behind the factory, because the other auto workers were discussing using it for target practice.  Mr. Grumpity was guardian of the rosebed for several years and granny’s (his mother) favorite animal he ever brought home.

Gretchen, a St. Bernard that had to be shaved from her prior owner’s neglect, and spent a week hiding from sight with such success in the house that they thought she’d run away.

Arson, Burglary and Murder, three frankly adorable little kittens.  They did not change the names, much to the regret of the cop who lived three doors down.

Yet another Cocker Spaniel, named “Colonel”

Cardinal (bird)

Canada Goose (Demon)

Once in the nursing home, he had a “pet” 12-point whitetail buck that would come to his window to be fed corn and get headskritches, inexplicably named “Florence”

The marriage only ended because thier time on earth did. He never kept an animal Grandma wouldn’t allow and if anything she was worse about it. She was the one who brought home a tarantula.

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my pride post i think

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so apparently Minecraft did this thing where people submitted their own builds to be made into steel structures that would be used to regrow coral in coral reefs, and one of the ones that got selected is a fishwolf, so now there is an actual physical minecraft wolf mermaid hybrid at the bottom of the ocean saving the coral reefs and i am living

(full video here btw)

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Schrodinger’s Script: If an “I love you” is written into a script and acted out, but doesn’t make it into the final cut, is it or is it not canon?

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NBC ARTICLE ABOUT QUEER LIBERATION LIBRARY?!?!?!

it’s more likely than you think!!!

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reasons to love harrison ford

1. hates donald trump 2. got his ear pierced at claires because why not 3. legit asks people to beat him up in action scenes EVEN NOW AS AN OLD MAN 4. is arguably one of the most iconic star wars characters yet couldnt give less of a crap abt star wars 5. the universe tried to kill him (or at least permanently incapacitate him) twice in 2015 and it only mildly inconvenienced him 6. flies helicopters in search and rescue missions 7. was in his 40s for the majority of the indiana jones series which is insane when you think about all the stunts involved 8. quote “the director yells cut and harrison cracks open a beer and then builds a fucking shed” 9. arguably sexy 10. points angrily and its super effective

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Actually I wasn't born in the wrong body I was just born in my body and then it was up to me to decide what I want to do with that

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