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puppercrab · 4 years

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A Midsummer Night’s Dream, Act 2 Scene 2

Lysander: Hermia I love you so much

Hermia: Aww I love you too

Lysander: Let’s fuck in the woods

Hermia: What

#midsummer night's dream #hermia #lysander #shakespeare #shakespeare memes

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puppercrab · 4 years

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Hey it’s been a while!

First off, just want to say I’m fine, just not super motivated lately.

Secondly, my stance on the blm movement is and will always be in favor of the black community and all in it. I’ve never disliked cops before, but whatever it takes to help give actual human beings the rights they deserve and should’ve had from the start, I will do.

Thirdly, I haven’t even touched the King Horatio play I was planning on making, but this usually happens with anything I try to write. I’ll try not to let this one slip through this time.

Anyway, I’ll try to post more, but I have to put school first for just another week or so.

(Oh and just an add on, I found out that the new blues clues absolutely SLAPS. And also the movie “Titus” with Anthony Hopkins and Alan Cumming is amazing but only if you’re okay with things getting weird fast. And I mean FAST. Okay bye now.)

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puppercrab · 4 years

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Okay, so I’ve had a few breakthroughs after the Andrew x Antonio thing I wrote. I thought about the number of other characters that weren’t with someone by the end of the play.

Now hear me out because it’s not gonna make ANY sense when I say it

Feste and Malvolio

SO HERES WHY BEFORE YOU SAY ANYTHING:

1. Enemies to lovers

2. They can get together over wine and Malvolio would like vent and Feste would comfort him or something

3. It would just work somehow

4. Malvolio needs a happy ending!! He just does!! REDEMPTION ARC FOR OUR BOY. I DEMAND IT.

5. Feste would totally soften up Malvolio and play him songs and it would be great.

Oh, and I’ve decided that Fabian would meet the Captain and they’d simply run away together for no reason. Also Valentine and Curio have been married since day one. It’s just facts. And with that said, now every person has been shipped with another. My work here is done.

And yes, I’ll write something for Feste and Malvolio too. It might not be as soon as the Antonio and Andrew one, but it’ll be there.

#shakespeare #shakespeare memes #twelfth night #malvolio #feste #malveste?#yes definitely malveste

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puppercrab · 4 years

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Okay bois I caved in when I found Amelia in an island while looking for tarantulas to give to Flick. I guess I just have to wait for Boyd to move out because he made a rude comment about another villager’s house and we don’t support bullies around here.

Okay so I made this in animal crossing. Now all I need is for Hamlet to buy the land I sold. And I even named my island Elsinore.

#shakespeare #shakespeare memes #hamlet #animal crosing new horizons #so close...

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puppercrab · 4 years

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My last plot has been put up for sale. Hamlet better get here by tomorrow. I have 9 islanders already and they’re all good and I don’t want to lose them so this has to be Hamlet or someone I’m willing to see move and that’s not a common thing. Wish me luck dudes.

Okay so I made this in animal crossing. Now all I need is for Hamlet to buy the land I sold. And I even named my island Elsinore.

#shakespeare #shakespeare memes #hamlet #animal crosing new horizons

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puppercrab · 4 years

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Okay so I made this in animal crossing. Now all I need is for Hamlet to buy the land I sold. And I even named my island Elsinore.

#shakespeare #shakespeare memes #hamlet #animal crosing new horizons #animal crossing

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puppercrab · 4 years

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Trust me, you haven’t written enough.

Finally reading Titus Andronicus & I’ve never written so many what the fucks in a book before

#titus andronicus #shakespeare #shakespeare memes #i love this play for some reason

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puppercrab · 4 years

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Here’s what I’m thinking:

Mercutio could’ve easily liked Romeo, but Romeo was way too into Juliet for things to even happen between them. And there isn’t really any proof against Benvolio being gay, in fact, his sexual orientation isn’t even mentioned, so I think between those two pairings, Benvolio and Mercutio would’ve had more chemistry, or at least been more believable with the plot of the entire play.

this is kind of random, sorry, but i’m trying to settle a debate. which has more chemistry, mercutio/romeo, or mercutio/benvolio?

@mauvekidgloves your vote does not count.

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puppercrab · 4 years

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I mean I’m not biased or anything, but house four seems pretty cool.

Choose your Shakespeare quarantine house! How self indulgent and chaotic do you want it?

#shakespeare #literally its me guys #im crab #see my profile? that me #i literally am required to choose house four #okay maybe not but whatever.

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puppercrab · 4 years

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Idea: a production of Hamlet but every actor is from Denmark (or Norway depending on what character) and the only English they can speak is their lines and it’s not the best English. They also all have extremely strong accents.

#shakespeare #shakespeare memes #hamlet

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puppercrab · 4 years

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Hey! So instead of a mean prank, today I thought I would simply take a quick break from my normal Shakespeare content to bring you Daryl, the raccoon that has been eating the cat food we put out for some of the strays in my neighborhood. We love Daryl and let all of the animals enjoy the food, even when some people say it’s a bad idea (There is an opossum that eats some of it, but I haven’t given them a name yet). Also, I kind of want Daryl as a pet, but I think it’s illegal in my state and he’s a wild animal, so I’m responsible and I don’t even open the door when he’s there (or she, I don’t really know, but I thought Daryl was a cool name so now I kind of have to stick with it. Though Daryl could work for a girl I guess). I have given a picture of Daryl below. Hope you enjoy! Before you comment, yes I know that raccoons can be dangerous, that’s why the closest contact I’ve come to with Daryl is eye contact. Plus, I think Daryl’s blind, so he (or she) just kind of looks in my direction and then back at the food. Either that or Daryl is comfortable with me as long as I stay behind my door.

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puppercrab · 4 years

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Okay I’m on a rampage with Twelfth Night right now but

Malvolio as a woman

Malvolia

CAN YOU IMAGINE THOUGH

That is all

#shakespeare #shakespeare memes #twelfth night #malvolio #malvolia #BUT REALLY THOUGH

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puppercrab · 4 years

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Okay here it is, the Sir Andrew x Antonio thing...

I’ll cut it short here because I learned how to do that so if you want to actually read it then go ahead but if not whatever.

I also forgot to save at one point. Not gonna lie, i cried a little, but it’s cool and it’s retyped, and I actually like it better.

Antonio was unlocked from his cuffs. Even hearing “You’re free to go” didn’t mend his broken heart. He seriously believed Sebastian loved him. Maybe even just the smallest bit. He couldn’t watch as Sebastian leaned in and kissed Olivia, hearing him tell her he loved her, and then that she loved him. They got a happy ending, so why couldn’t he?

He had nowhere to go and no one to help him as he walked through Illyria in defeat. Soon enough, he had returned to the Countess’ palace, only to hear a man’s voice yelling.

“Is it me, Sir Toby? Is it something I did? Why would she choose that total stranger over someone she knows?”

“No, no, Sir Andrew,” responds a second voice, “Maybe she just knew you too well. I don’t know what goes on in my niece’s head. She tends to go towards the more...”

“Eh? The more what,” replies the first. The second voice hesitates but says, “The more brutish men. You’re more of... uh... the charismatic type.”

The first scoffs and says, “I see what you’re trying to do, Toby, you’re just trying to soften the blow. It’s not working. Besides, I saw him. He’s far more charismatic than I am and I’m willing to admit that.”

Antonio listened from behind a tree but only thought now to look. He was careful to hide behind a nearby bush. His view was of a portly older man and a lanky young man. There was something about that younger man, but he couldn’t put his finger on it. The way he dressed, or talked maybe? Something about this Sir Andrew was intriguing... and maybe even a little endearing.

The young gentleman sat on a bench outside of Olivia’s palace, his head in his hands. The older Sir Toby had his hand on the younger man’s back, comforting him. Antonio could feel his pain, even from so far away, and it only enhanced the sudden feelings he felt for him.

His admiration came to a grinding halt when he lost balance and caused the bush to rustle loudly in an attempt to catch himself. Both men immediately glanced over.

“Hello?” The first voice suddenly seemed much more comforting than before, even when no comforting words were spoken and nothing was known about him.

“Oh, uh, hello,” stutters Antonio in reply, “I was just walking and I happened to hear your complaints. It seems we share similar troubles.”

Toby saw a window of opportunity. He had never actually asked Andrew how he felt on the subject, but he figured it’d be worth a try. He rushes to say, “Why don’t you two talk about it? It’s always good to get your feelings out. I’ll be right back.” Toby runs into the palace, leaving Andrew and Antonio alone... together.

“I am... Andrew. Sir Andrew Aguecheek,” he says as he offers a handshake.

“I’m Antonio,” he shakes Andrew’s hand and sits on the bench with him.

“Hold on, you look familiar... weren’t you arrested during my duel with Cesario- Well, I guess it’s not Cesario anymore, is it?” Andrew laughs at his own joke.

Antonio completely forgot. That’s why he reminded him of Sebastian so much.

“Wait,” says Andrew, interrupting Antonio’s thoughts, “Didn’t you almost... fight me?”

Antonio was quick to comment. “Well, I thought he, er, she was Sebastian, a dear friend of mine. Or at least dearer at the time...”

Andrew looked at Antonio’s face as the heartbreak set in once more. He felt bad for this stranger. “If it helps, I know how you feel. I was in love with Olivia, the one that married your Sebastian.”

They both sat and thought about those two together. It hurt them, and they weren’t even there.

“I still can’t believe she married a stranger,” scoffs Andrew, “Sure, she thought he was Cesario, but even then, it was made clear that nothing would happen between them. She doesn’t seem like she’d ignore something like that.”

“Well, it doesn’t help that Sebastian is a love-at-first-sight kind of man,” Antonio chuckles, but suddenly sighs and says, “Maybe I should’ve considered that before I let myself believe that he might...”

“Hey,” Andrew says, putting a hand on Antonio’s shoulder, “It’s alright. We’re both going through this. At least you have some wit going for you. Nowadays, I might as well refer to myself as a babbling drunk, and Toby’s been no help to that.”

Antonio glances at the hand on his shoulder and smiles. “I think we’ll just have to accept that they weren’t the right people for us.”

“Well that’s for certain,” Andrew chuckles. They share a laugh at their sorrows, not noticing Toby returning with Maria and Feste.

“I’m telling you, Maria,” whispers Toby, “This might just work. I owe it to Andrew for letting him believe he had any chance with Olivia, the poor bloke.”

Maria whispers back, “A man? Toby, we don’t even know if Sir Andrew is-”

“We ought to give it a shot at least,” he interrupts quietly.

Feste looks at the two gentlemen, laughing and talking to each other. “You may have a point, Sir Toby,” he comments, still in whisper tone, “They remind me of that Sebastian and your niece. I’ve never seen the two unhappy when together. Not to mention that I’ve noticed Sir Andrew acting a bit strange around certain men.” Feste giggles to himself while recounting those memories.

“Antonio,” says Andrew almost hesitantly, “How many people have you loved like you loved Sebastian?”

Antonio was surprised by the question. He hadn’t really considered how much he loved Sebastian. He knew it was a lot, but only one person came to mind that even compared to Sebastian. It helped that he had only really loved two men.

“There is one man,” says Antonio.

“Tell me about him.”

“Alright, well, he’s not necessarily the smartest or the strongest, but I think he’ll make up for it with a good heart.”

“Sounds like a loser to me,” chuckles Andrew.

“If you knew him, you wouldn’t say that,” says Antonio, laughing. They sit together in awkward silence for a few seconds before it’s broken by Andrew.

“Would you like... some wine? There’s plenty in the palace,” he says nervously.

“That would be nice,” says Antonio without missing a beat.

“I told you, Maria,” yells Toby, not noticing that he had yelled until Antonio and Andrew were looking where he, Maria, and Feste stood. Toby looks back at them. “Oh, uh, hello, Sir Andrew. Would you... like to bring your friend in for wine?”

Andrew freezes, his face turning redder by the second. “Wh- Wh- What are you all doing here? You can’t just- spy on people!”

Antonio laughs to himself. “I suppose you know them?”

“Yes, I do,” Andrew groans, embarrassed. He stands from the bench. “I suppose we should go get some wine now?” He offers his hand to help Antonio up, which he takes and stands. Toby, Maria, and Feste eagerly run inside to the cellar. Before him and Andrew enter, Antonio stops him.

“Wait,” he says, “I think I should tell you something.”

Andrew turns, confused. “Okay, go on.”

“i just wanted to say that I think I understand why it wasn’t so hard for Sebastian to marry Olivia so soon,” he says as he nervously laughs.

“I think I might, too,” says Andrew, now with a wide smile on his face.

Feste peeks his head out of the palace entrance. “Well, are you two coming or not? The wine’ll be gone by the time you’re done if you don’t hurry!”

The two men laugh and follow Feste inside. Maybe Antonio wasn’t so alone after all. Maybe he finally got his happy ending.

#shakespeare #shakespeare memes #twelfth night #sir andrew aguecheek #antonio #andrew #sir andrew x antonio #andtonio #is andtonio a good ship name?#sir toby belch #maria #feste

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puppercrab · 4 years

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Okay so hear me out

Andrew Aguecheek and Antonio end up together and the end of Twelfth Night.

Reasons why yes:

Keeps Antonio canonically gay.

They both pretty much got rejected, and by people who ended up together (Antonio by Sebastian and Andrew by Olivia). Easily a conversation topic.

Antonio would likely get along with Toby, Maria, Feste, and Fabian super well. He seems like the kind of person to spite authority and would be an excellent addition to the gang when messing with Malvolio.

Antonio is extremely committed to helping the people he cares about. That just seems like a good boyfriend. Like, come on. Not to mention how much help Andrew probably needs. Wait, cute date idea relating to that: Antonio teaching Andrew how to properly fight.

There is literally NEVER dialogue between them. Taking it to the other extreme of a full on relationship? Aboslutely here for it.

I think I made my point.

EDIT: I REALLY WANNA WRITE SOMETHING FOR THIS AND THATS EXACTLY WHATS GONNA HAPPEN GIVE ME LIKE AN HOUR OR SO UNLESS I GET DISTRACTED WHICH IS EXTREMELY LIKELY

#shakespeare #shakespeare memes #twelfth night #antonio #sir andrew aguecheek #andrew #antonio was just totally left out at the end there #we gotta give him something

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puppercrab · 4 years

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Excellent suggestion! I actually hadn’t read it before you mentioned it. But don’t you worry, I’ll make it sad, even though I did cry a bit at Arcite’s death. So, here’s the list:

1. If the Jailer’s daughter was fully rejected by Palamon and nobody came up with the idea to dress the Wooer as Palamon. She’s just sad for the rest of the play.

2. If Emilia never loved Arcite or Palamon and was forced to marry them.

3. If Palamon and Arcite physically fought in the jail cell. Just adds to the betrayal felt on both sides.

4. If Palamon had something to do with Arcite’s death, like provoking the horse he fell off of (which in my opinion was a hit out of left field and was a stupid way to die...).

5. If something happened to Theseus some point near Arcite dying. Hippolyta and Emilia would be sad together and cry probably.

6. If Palamon and Arcite never made up and Palamon felt guilt for never apologizing to Arcite before he died.

7. If Arcite’s death was LITERALLY ANY MORE SERIOUS. I MEAN A HORSE? (I’m sorry I just hate this part. Really, though, he fell off of a horse?)

8. If Emilia and Arcite had any children and the children had to watch their father die.

9. Here’s one that I don’t know would be sad, but definitely surprising: If Emilia had something to do with Arcite’s death. I mean, she did give Arcite the horse.

10. If Arcite died before he could say goodbye to anyone, especially if he makes note that he means to before he dies, but he just doesn’t make it in time.

Overall, the play is pretty sad, but I think I’d cry a whole lot more if any of this happened... Still can’t get over that horse thing...

I’ve decided that I’m not sad enough today and neither are you so here are some things that would make Titus Andronicus EVEN SADDER:

1. If Lucius and Lavinia we’re far closer than any of the other siblings or just talked to each other more than with any of the other siblings.

2. If Titus has said something like “I love you” as he stabbed Lavinia.

3. If pie was either Chiron and Demetrius’ or Tamora’s favorite food.

4. If Chiron and Demetrius felt terrible about doing all that to Lavinia and desperately wanted to apologize but Tamora or Aaron never let them.

5. If all of the dead sons had names. It’s just more personal that way, so it hurts more.

6. Saturninus acknowledging the fact that he never fixed his and Bassianus’ relationship before he found him dead.

7. Having Alarbus’ death be on stage right in front of his family.

8. Having Young Lucius miss his father.

9. Seeing Lucius being separated from whoever Young Lucius’ mother is or acknowledging her death if that’s the case. There are only two options for peak sadness.

10. Having Lavinia trying really hard to speak but no matter what she does, she can only make noises, and frankly disturbing noises at that.

Literally name any tragedy that you want utterly destroyed and I will have a list within mere minutes.

OR I can do what would make any comedy happier, which will be equally fun for me.

#shakespeare #shakespeare memes #two noble kinsmen #what would make this sadder #HE FELL OFF OF A HORRSSSEEEEE

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