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aw i'm sorry to hear about your very unlucky 'luck' haha, but i hope you'll feel better in a bit! I cant wait for the new chapters, but take your time with them! ♡~

Thank you

I’m already getting better. The headaches are disappearing, I’m feeling less tired, I’m not out of breath anymore and I’m finding some energy again.

I do still have my eye that twitches, muscle spasms and sometimes the feeling that my toes are going to cramp. So consider the worst over :) I’ll be at my 100% very fast now!

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I hope you are well and I just wanted to send you motivation because you deserve it ! Renegade is so good but Rome wasn't build in one day so masterpieces take time ! Stay hydrated, sleep well and eat well

I’m trying my best to stay healthy! But as I explained in this post my health really isn’t that amazing :) I’m starting to see a pattern though. April and October are usually the months something is very wrong. 

I agreed with my doctor to start taking regular blood tests now because honestly, everytime something is wrong it feels l’ve been send to hell and I get scared to eat because I always get more tired after I eat. 

Like I also said in the other post, I’m so sorry that now I know I’m getting better, I’ve planned a few days off of work to make it up to all my readers

It’s certainly not that I’ve lost motivation or don’t feel like writing anymore, just some personal problems. Still, thanks a lot for caring about me

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Hey cutie are u alive I m just worried it been a long time since u uploaded love u

Hi

I’m alive. I’ve been feeling pretty much dead lately, but I’m alive.

Since about a year and a half / almost two, I have been suffering badly from vitamine deficiensies which can make me feel extremely tired and washed-out. All the results from an operation I had more than 5 years ago.

In july/august 2015 I started feeling extremely tired. To spike my energy, I started drinking lots and lots of water and that helped a lot, until in october 2015 it got worse again and I went to the doctor’s office for a blood test. I had iron deficiency anemia. 

I got some supplements and some tests done, nothing strange found, but the supplements didn’t work. My body has problems to absorb the iron, so it’s not my diet that’s the problem either. As a result, in November 2015 I had to go to the hospital to get iron via infusion. Tiredness gone within a week!

Then in april 2016 I started feeling very tired again. It usually takes me a month or so to conclude ‘there really is something wrong’, so after a month of suffering, I went to the doctor’s office again and my Iron deficiency anemia had returned. I was sent back to the hospital and the doctor there gave me a different infusion, one that is much stronger so I would last longer. 

October 2016. Again freaking tired. When I say tired, imagine staying in your bed for 15 hours and still feeling tired and every small thing you do seems to be too much. I got to the point where I would wake up in the morning and once I took the stairs up, I had to ‘rest’ for five minutes because my heart would act crazy and I’d be out of breath as if I just ran a marathon... 

I went back to the doctor’s office, thinking it was my iron, and got another blood test. Result: Iron is perfectly fine, but vitamine B12 and folic acid is VERY LOW. So then I got a lot of B12 syringes in a very short period and since then I have to get a new syringe of B12 on a monthly basis. As for the folic acid, I take by supplements. Mostly when you start with syringes of B12, it’s for the rest of your life. A normal human body has three years of excess stocked of B12, so if you have a deficiency of that, it’s your body that’s not absorbing it.

And if that ain’t enough, now it’s april 2017, and I am somewhat short on freaking magnesium; which you can find in EVERY FOOD YOU EAT. I’ve known since last thursday after another blood test and now I’m taking magnesium supplements. I’m already feeling quite better since, I expect to be back to normal somewhere around wednesday or so at this rate. My doctor also says my iron is decreasing but he’s keeping an eye on that so that I don’t have to walk into the doctor’s office like a zombie anymore. 

So now you know why I’ve been ‘dead’. This weekend I’ve already felt better and I’m rewriting entire part 2 and 3 of Renegade 5, because I thought of something during my absence and I can’t let that thought go. I also booked in some holidays at the start of next week so I can also write entire chapter 6 and make it up to you all by posting that one really fast

My apologies for looking dead, sure many of you have been worried 

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Cause you’re my one in a million Sono mama de believe me Kimi ga one in a million Deaeta toki ni Baby, it’s my destiny

I love singing along to this song! So, I was tagged by the sweet @writing-bout-you​ -Thank you sweetie- to do the Backgrounds, Last song and Selfie thingy.  Ah yes, both background and lock screen are Chanyeol... I love him so much. I feel I have quite some things in common with that boy. Dumbo ears included... My dumbo ears are the only thing that helps create the illusion that I have some volume in my hair when it’s all down haha. I’m not really the selfie-type, maybe I do this twice a year? The lightening is so bad in my picture woah. 

The song is One in a million by Yamashita Tomohisa. Although I only write for EXO, I listen to many other Asian groups too. Having nine boys to handle in my writing is more than enough already!

I’m obliged to tag some people. So here we go. If you don’t want to do it or you’ve already done this, then don’t. Ahhhh... Let’s see. @memoiresofaneternaldreamer​ , @dandelionder @perfectwolfwolf @yeollieollie @loser-dot-com

#challenge #personal

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I just love you

You have no idea how much I love you back~ 

You make me really happy for doing what I like to do, the way I like to do. I can’t feel any more appreciated than that. It feels like you’re fulfilling part of a girl’s childhood dream.

Huge hugs!!!

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Fighting fighting don't rush it cause I know it going to be great I always check if you have updated renegade it s reallly good omg I want to know what is she what going to happen like I have soo many question gosh you are so gooood

I can’t get over how kind and considerate this fandom is. Seriously!I love being here. I’m staying forever. Just because everyone’s so nice. ❤Back in the day, I wrote for another fandom. I remember working on one chapter for three weeks non-stop. Coming home, spending my free time working on that, spending my entire weekends on that as well. One rewrite, Two rewrites, Three rewrites. Sometimes I look back at that writing and wonder: “How did I write this? HOWWWWWWW????!!!!”Within the first day after I updated, I got so many update questions on the next chapter, most pretty blunt, “When’s next part coming?”, that I felt pressured and afterwards pretty much fucked up my entire fic because I wrote serious mistakes in the fic due to the pressure. Never again, I said.

I have a small confession to make... Please don’t get mad. Last weekend, I finished chapter 5 but I’m still trying to correct bits and pieces by rewriting them. It’s not so bad that it would fuck up my fic; storywise there’s no mistake in there at all. It’s purely the writing that bothers me a little.I told myself: “Try to fix it as good as you can this week, and if you can’t, that’s ok! Other opportunities will arise to practice on it”. So no matter what, I’m putting it on here Sunday. I hope it’ll be the version I desire to achieve. We shall see!

Love delight~ ❤

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I really like Renegade and I was wondering if it was okay to ask you what are your favorites pictures of Chanyeol ? The ones which inspire you for the story ?

Omo

It’s as if you can read through me, Anon. While I write, I often look at pictures and gifs…

Now you have to know, I love entire EXO. I love each and every one of the members. They are all amazing, they are all out-of-the-heavens God-like, I would be heartbroken if anything happened to them.

But I have a HUGE WEAK for Chanyeol. *admits it*

There are so many pictures of him that inspire me, so many pictures that are my favorite- The list is endless ~ 

Some here:

For the story, I try to write Chanyeol more as he appears to me in real life. Smart, talented, cute, hot, bit of a dork, shy with girls… 

Stylewise the same. In my story I try to aim more for Chanyeol with his hoodies, large t-shirts, caps, sportswear, …. Unless he’s lecturing!

Assistant Professor Chanyeol I see more like the first one on the bottom row of both photo collages! Dressed up but not too much. The tie would be that little too much for him, I imagine. 

I love Chanyeol and his hoodies. Gives the impression of a warm person for some reason. Maybe because hoodies are warm? ~ 

Now you have to know that when I write, I have lots of excess space free on my desktop to put pictures and such. I can basically stare at him the entire time while writing, without having to switch windows. 

This is my work-environment:

And this is what happens when I’m working:

At my left -> Chrome with at least 3 tabs: Google Translate, Macmillian dictionary, ThesaurusIn the middle -> Picture of Chanyeol… Renegade word document… Another picture of Chanyeol (These change constantly!)At my right -> This screen I don’t always need, so when it’s not in use, there’s always a gif playing. These also change constantly, but my ultimate favorite? Call me baby Chanyeol!Bonus -> 2 Happiness Delight water bottles at the far left and an EXO mousemat~ 

So when I don’t know how to solve a certain issue in my writing I can look at Chanyeol and ask him for help haha. He’s been very helpful!Likewise when I write other stories, my entire desktop transforms to suit that EXO member. They all help me out.

Now you know how I brainstorm, how I write, how I get my inspiration picture-wise. I hope this answer is what you hoped for!

#maelströmlove #Park Chanyeol #chanyeol

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300 Followers!

This number is growing so fast I can’t even keep up with writing wow~ 

#maelströmlove #300 followers

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I just wanted to ask how is the process with chanyeol s serie btw I love it u don't need to rush ur writing is beyond awesome

Hi there Anon, 

No biggie! I have this weird tendency to write several things at the same time… I have to write chronologically in my stories, but between stories I constantly switch. This keeps things interesting for me, too, because I already know what’s going to happen in my stories.

For Renegade, I am guessing I’ve written 1/3rd of Chapter 5 already? Don’t take my word for it, I suck at estimating these things. I often think it’s shorter than it really is, and when I give you a release date I work hard to reach that date but there’s always something in my writing I’m not happy about or that isn’t going well *drops head on desk* :( 

Lately I’ve been quite distracted by the idea of a new Suho series - Sorry!- But now I have my mind back, Renegade will be my main focus again. I miss those two!

Right now the release order should be:

1. Renegade Pt 5.2. Bittersweet (Baekhyun oneshot)3. Till Death Do Us Part, Pt 1 (New Suho series I’m going to work on!)4. Renegade Pt 6.

#maelströmlove #renegadeasks

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I THINK YOU SHOULD WRITE IT ! Because Junmyeon + Kyungsoo + angst + book-like + suspense in the plot... I'M READY

I guess this means I’m writing it! 

Omo so much research to do on one little thing… This has to be accurate. I am not going to go for anything less than that. It has to be perrrrfect

I really hope I can bring this story as good as it deserves to be brought!

Love!

#maelströmlove

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Study buddy (Smut)

I often imagine Sehun being the Flirt Master who can get any girl... 

Pairing: Sehun x Reader

Genre: Smut

Word count: 5543 words

Warning: Rough sex, Public sex, Dirty-Dirty talk, Voyeurism

AU: College!AU

Study buddy

Four standard assumptions of perfectly competitive models – One. Economies of scale are… small relative… to the size of the… market. Two. Output… is homogenous. Three. Information… is… soft- and… fluffy. Four. I want to marry you… sweet, cuddly turtle-bunny-cushion. Something hits the elbow you’re leaning your head upon and you shoot up, slightly panicking. Shit. You had fallen asleep. It was only for a minute; you defend yourself in your mind. Nobody saw you, right?

You lift your hands to rub your eyes but stop yourself in the nick of time. You have almost forgotten that you are wearing black eyeliner and mascara. Thank God you remembered just in time – It would have been a catastrophe if you didn’t.

You look around, pinching your eyes a few times instead and examining the endless array of tables that is populated with college students and their college books, notebooks, markers and pencils. During the exam periods, it’s difficult to find a spot left empty. Outside the College library, there’s typically a line of students waiting to claim a seat, even at this unholy hour of nine pm.

You whine silently, staring at the thermos flask in front of you which you emptied about an hour ago. No more coffee. How are you going to survive another three hours of studying when you’re out of fuel? You shake your head, taking a deep inhale afterwards. Ah- you remember. What was that thing?

You look beside you, finding a bottle of water that is laying on the table. Where did that- You look at the other students on your table, all looking down at their books and concentrating diligently on the matter they’re studying. The water bottle has a piece of notebook paper slid underneath the plastic label, you notice. Curious, you pick it up and remove it smoothly from underneath. There’s a note on it.

Water works better to battle fatigue than coffee does. Two litres a day keeps your body hydrated and you’ll feel less tired. Fighting!

The note ends with a self-drawn wink emoticon. Who- You peer your eyes over the students at your table, now finding a- Omo. Hot guy at two ‘o clock smiling at me. Dark brown hair, brown eyes, perfect facial structure, charming smile. You quickly look down at the note again, trying to hide yourself from his piercing stare. Is it his note?

You glance up once more to the guy sitting two seats away from you at the opposite side of the table. He’s still smiling at you. Really handsome! The stranger shakes with his own water bottle, hinting that it was him who rolled it at you. He’s kind, too. You bow to thank him but he still doesn’t let his eyes leave you.

You contemplate for a minute whether to reply to his note. Would that be weird? You wonder. You grasp all your courage together to do so anyways, ripping a piece of paper of your note pad.

Thanks, although I doubt water will save me now. Do you happen to have an instant solution?

You crumple the paper up into a ball and roll the ball towards him. Scared to face him as he opens it, you try to focus on the study material in front of you again. Price takers believe or act as if they can sell or buy as much or as little as they want without affecting the price. In effect they act as if prices are independent of their behaviour. You feel a little tick on the side of your head, followed by the sound of a piece of paper dropping on the wooden table. The stranger has folded an airplane out his note, this time.

No. Sorry :(

You sigh slightly, reaching for the bottle of water and taking a few sips. Maybe because you’re too tired and distracted, you decide to reply to the stranger once more, throwing another crumpled up paper ball at him.

Thanks anyways. For the water and for waking me up. Fighting!

Fifteen minutes pass, you’ve advanced a bit in your studying and it seems to be going well. Occasionally, you steal a few glances at the guy who woke you up. You’re not sure if you’ve seen him on campus before. He’s definitely not from your department; you would know if that was the case.

You rest your head on your palm, your elbow leaning on the table. You start reading the next page, your eyes blinking more often than usual. A firm has market power if it finds it profitable to raise price above marginal cost. The ability of a firm… to profitably raise price above marginal cost… depends on the extent… to which consumers… can substitute… to other... handsome guy… at two ‘o clock…

You’re much faster than the first time to regain your composure, spotting the second water bottle that woke you up. Aish! This is so embarrassing. There’s another note slid underneath the label.

There is one way but you might not be up for it…

This wakes you up. If not just for your interest that’s reaching a peak, it’s for the guy you were dreaming about that’s still trying to help you. Excited, you pick up your pencil, scribbling a new message on it.

Really? Tell me! PS: Be careful, you’re going to run out of water bottles at this rate.

Instead of crumpling the paper up, you now slid it back under the label of the second water bottle, giving it a gentle push to roll it back at him. When you see it hits his arm, you quickly look down at your book again.

You expect another airplane, but alternatively you see the second water bottle rolling against your college book.

Don’t worry. Stole them from my study buddy next to me. He’s got no clue. Admirable concentration that guy has! Bet he doesn’t even need them. You look great today, despite being tired. Shame of those earrings though, they don’t compliment your beautiful eyes well.

You blink at his message a few times. Especially at the last part. Has he seen me before? You look down at what you’re wearing. Casual chic sapphire dress. Not any different from what you usually wear during summer. Then you think about your earrings. You can hardly remember which ones you’re wearing.

You hear your phone buzzing on the table. You hover your eyes over the display, discovering a new text message from your best friend who’s sitting five seats away from you.

IS THE OH SEHUN SMILING AT YOU? OMG LUCKY GIRL HE’S SO HAWT!!!!

Oh Sehun? You swear you’ve never heard of him before. Or maybe it does ring a bell somewhere in the back of your mind- you’re not entirely sure. Probably your friend has mentioned him to you before, once or twice. Also, what’s with the caps...

Why, who is he?

You hit send.

!!!! OH C’MON HE’S ONE OF THE MOST POPULAR STUDENTS FROM THE MUSIC AND THEATRE ARTS DEPARTMENT. ALL THE GIRLS WANT HIM. 2ND YEAR STUDENT OH SEHUN??????!!!!!

You nod at the text message, concluding he is one year older than you since you’re still a first year student. Before you even get the chance to type a reply, you get another text from her.

GO GET HIM!!!!!!!!!!

Is it just you, or is she overreacting, you wonder. She’s crazy. You put your phone away in your backpack that is standing next to your chair on the floor, not bothering to reply. So his name is Sehun, hmmm? You tick the wooden table with your nails.

Do my earrings really not suit me? You take them out and observe them up close, dangling them between your fingers. Silver coloured earrings with blue jewels, is it that bad? Maybe the wrong type of blue? You look back at the stranger at two ‘o clock, now identifiable as Sehun. He’s folding another piece of paper. You try to guess what he’s making, but it’s not until it reaches you with a swift throw, that you discover it to be a butterfly. On its wings, you find his new message.

I was right. You’re even prettier without them. What are you studying?

You’re not slacking off; you’re just being honest with yourself. You’re too tired to study and you’re too interested in Sehun to let go of him, so before you realize, you start an entire message exchange with him using crumpled paper balls, each time receiving a response with a new figure he folds; flowers, animals. Hottie seems skilled in origami.

Stealing water bottles from the guy next to you? Bad boy! Economics. You?

I’m elaborately studying how not to enjoy myself. Thank god you’re here. Economics? You must be a very smart girl. Your passion?

No way! I study economics because well… I’m good at it and that’s where the money is, my dad tells me.

So you’re not studying what you love? What would you study, should money not be a burden in your life later on? PS: What’s your name?

Dancing! I’d go to a dance school. PS: It’s (y/n). Yours is Sehun, right?

That’s interesting, (y/n). Cute name btw. Yes, I’m Sehun. Which dancing style? Also, pass me your eraser, I can’t find mine.

Street dance and contemporary dance. Sorry, I know it looks childish… But it’s a really great eraser!

How am I supposed to use this? It’s a Panda! It’s too cute to use! I need my own Panda eraser. It’s amazing.

What are you, a girl? Just use it! Start with its feet then. :D

I can’t believe you used his entire butt… If I’m a girl, are you a boy?

His butt is still white, ok? :’) Just shaped a little flat… Also, I’m definitely not a boy. If anything I am at least a man.

It’s not up to you to decide whether you’re a man or a boy, that’s up to the woman… ME!

Oh that’s rude!

Why, want to be the woman again, (y/n)? J

Yes! You be the boy-

Hey, hey, hey. Don’t label me yet. As a woman, you owe it to me to give me the opportunity to prove myself otherwise~

Now how would you do that, Mr. Oh?

That message has been left without reply by Sehun since ten minutes. Did I go overboard by challenging him… or is it because I used his family name? Maybe he doesn’t like me. You rub your temples with your index fingers, staring upwards to the delicate latticed skylight made out of heavy glass.

The college library is impressive. It has been designed as an atrium, with a large open space in the middle where tables occupy the whole of the centre. Surrounding the study room are columns of book stacks, levelling up four tiers that are closed in via balconies which rise to the skylight.

What are you so disappointed about, (y/n). You don’t even like this guy for real. You just think he’s physically attractive, you admit to yourself. That’s all. You roll your eyes, grunting silently. Another two hours before you allow yourself to give up on studying for the day.

You glance back at Sehun, peeping at what he’s doing. He’s texting. Probably found someone more interesting to talk to. You let your head fall onto your notebook, not even realising how hard the guy in front of you has been pitying you. He raises an eyebrow at you, then nudges you.

“You better go home. You need some sleep”, he says. You jerk your head up, shaking it strongly in protest.

“No, two more hours!” You murmur and empty the first water bottle Sehun gave you. The guy in front of you hisses, but you try to ignore him. Come on. You encourage yourself. That’s when you suddenly remember- Hey, didn’t Sehun know a way to keep me awake? You stretch your arms in the air quickly before ripping off one last piece of paper from your note pad.

Whatever it is that can solve my tiredness-problem, I’m up for it. I need it. Desperately!

There goes nothing, you think as you throw the crumpled paper ball at Sehun. You follow the ball with your eyes until it lands in between him and the table. For a moment you think he has to search underneath the table to find it, but as he picks it up, you realize that it was just resting on his crotch.

The second he reads your note, Sehun smirks at it. It leaves you somewhat confused, he had been ignoring you and now he seems happy to be hearing from you. What in the world? You scratch your head.

Unlike his previous answers, this one arrived exactly like yours, in a crumpled up paper ball. Before opening it up, you steal another glance at him. His eyes are fixed on you, barely blinking and accompanied with a grin. Unlike the first time you noticed him watch you, he seems more confident, more familiar, it is hard to point out for you how different it is exactly. You open the note, finding a rather unexpected answer.

Want to take a break? I think we both deserve one. Leave behind your stuff and FOLLOW ME. Maybe you don’t know this yet, but we’re allowed to leave our seats, you know? From the moment one of the librarians notices we’re gone, we have exactly twenty minutes before they think we’ve left and take away our stuff so they can give our seats to someone else. Let’s have a chat!

You hear Sehun stand up from his seat the moment you finish reading his message. For some reason, you’re excited. He seems a lot of fun to be around. You decide not to waste too much time and get up from your chair, witnessing Sehun has already reached the staircase. You run after him, more precisely you speed-walk after him, staying at a safe distance of several meters.

Your nerves are killing you and you’re not sure why. You recall your best friend telling you how all the girls want him and you feel your heart starting to beat faster; it has been a while since you’ve been alone with a stud like him. You’re curious about him. You’ve only had contact over sheets of paper but you would have no idea what he sounds like or how much his personality differs from his origami exchanges. You would compare it to finally getting to meet a guy you’ve been talking to over the internet.  

You trace the fingers of your left hand over the rails of the balcony as you walk beside it, looking down at the study hall from the top floor and spotting your best friend who is making hand gestures from afar. You’re unable to decipher the weird hand movements she’s making, so you look forward at Sehun, who’s walking confidently with his hands stuffed in his front pockets.

Cute ass. Handsome back posture as well. It’s the first time you take the opportunity to observe thoroughly what he is wearing. Brown dress shoes, blue jeans with holes, white shirt. From the back, he certainly gives off the vibe of a man, you remember the conversation you had with him about being a boy or a man.

It seems almost random when Sehun takes a turn and disappears into one of the columns of book cases at his right. You realize you were too busy eyeing his magnificent bum for you to register which column he walked into, so you’re not all that surprised when you suddenly feel a hand grab your wrist and Sehun yanks you into one of the columns.

“Hey Panda-killer babe, it’s here”, Sehun whispers laughingly and loosens his grip on you slightly as he pulls you further into the column.

The columns aren’t very deep nor wide. Maximum two meters wide and ten meters deep, you estimate. Sehun lets go of you once he has gently dragged you to the middle and you trace your eyes over the titles on the books that are displayed.

“What section is this?” You ask, first attempting to figure it out for yourself. You’ve never been on the top floor of the library before. Books on economics are on the second tier.

“Our section”, Sehun replies. You turn around to face him, finding him leaning against the shelves at the end of the column, close to the wall. He beams his brightest smile at you and you comply, strolling to the end of the column and doing the same. It doesn’t really matter which section it is, you’re here to relax, you realize.

“Right”, you say and you go to stand against the shelves opposite to Sehun, your hands squished between the books and your butt as you lean against the shelves yourself. “I hear you’re in the music and theatre arts department?” you ask.

“Someone’s got resourceful friends”, Sehun laughs. “Tell me, what else do your sources say about me?” Usually you aren’t as straightforward, but because of the paper conversations you’ve had with him, you feel self-assured and comfortable around him to be honest with him.

“That you’re hawt and that all the girls want you”, you say fearless, cracking a smile. “That’s about it”. Despite knowing Sehun for an hour, you have faith that this answer will satisfy him. He looks like the type who knows what he’s worth. Overconfident, having a bit of an ego.

“Interesting sources you’ve got. So what about you? How do you perceive that observation from your friend, (y/n)?” You did not expect this answer, or better, this question. You stare in front of yourself, having to think twice before you realise what he’s asking exactly. Is he asking me whether I think he’s hot? Whether I want him?

Your brain freezes. Never before did you transform so fast from confident to shy by the words of a guy. Unconsciously, you bite your lower lip, tracing the lines of his salacious body and handsome features with your irises. Your heart beats faster again, this time accompanied by your body which starts to tremble nervously. Ooh fuck he’s so freaking hot, is the only sentence your mind can produce but you’re too scared to say it out loud. Even you realize that, in your mind, you’re sounding desperate for him.

“I’m guessing that means you agree”, Sehun says and pushes himself off the book case behind him. In a split second, you feel his hand cup your cheek and his lips crash onto yours. You’re a bit shocked at first, but soon you follow and close your eyes. His lips move slowly, brushing feather-light kisses on yours, allowing you to tune in on the kiss easily. So soft~ And he smells so good.

Sehun rests the fingertips of his free hand on your waist, caressing it soothingly whilst he deepens the kiss. As he tentatively traces your tongue with his, he lets go of his other hand on your cheek and gently draws a line from behind your ear, down your neck, over your soft spot to the middle of your breasts until his digit reaches the piece of sapphire blue fabric you’re wearing.

You don’t recall kisses to be that- fucking delicious. He tastes so goddamn…- You wrap your arms around his neck, pulling him closer and unbeknownst yourself, you increase the speed of the kiss, trying to conquer his tongue lustfully. You let your fingers glide through his hair, allowing the maximum of your senses to be absorbed by him fully; his fragrance, his touch, his kiss, the sound of your hungry kisses, everything. Everything is focused on him, him and you.

You hear Sehun fiddling in the bookshelves with the hand that just ran over your sweet spot. Perfectly in sync with the moment where he pulls out a book from the shelves, he pulls away from you and leans against the wall at the end of the column. You’re dumbfounded on how he brutally stopped the kiss, witnessing him opening the book somewhere in the middle, looking down at it and ignoring you, not uttering a single word.

You’re offended by his strange behaviour and want to lash out on him for playing you like this, but before you can collect the right words in your mind, you hear the sound of high heels clicking. You behold the balcony, discovering one of the female librarians pass by. Instantaneously, your anger disappears. He just has good ears. You wait until the librarian is a few columns further before you mock him about it.

“Scared to get caught?” you tease, seeing Sehun stuff the book into the shelves next to him instead of positioning it back into its original location.

“Less than you are”, he says and tugs you over to him so that he traps you in his arms, your back leaning against his chest. With his knuckles, he starts caressing your waist at both sides, repeating the up and down motion that tranquilizes you. “Aren’t you scared of what this bad- boy can do to you?” he whispers in your ear, his voice hoarse and raw. You realize he’s referring back to your own words earlier on, but coming from his mouth, you know he has assigned a different meaning to it. To magnify his statement, he nips at your earlobe once, followed by his lips that delight the back of your ear. “You asked me how I’d prove I’m a man”. You’re becoming enticingly ensnared by him, closing your eyes, hearing his every breath pass your ear.

He has successfully captivated your mind and thoughts with words and sexual advances for you to become so stimulated that you don’t answer him, so Sehun decides to work you up a little more. “For you, I can be both. A real man- and a bad, very bad boy”, he says. He initiates kisses behind your ear, puckering gentle ones on the same trail down your neck as before. Oh that feels so fucking good. His kisses are deliberately using a hint of saliva, making you quiver each time he moves on to the next spot, the cold air brushing over the wet, exposed skin making you throb.

You let your head fall back and rest on his shoulder, your breath hitching. When he arrives at your soft spot, you let out a low moan, encouraging him to gently tug on the same skin with his teeth, his tongue flicking over the flesh locked in his mouth. Ofttimes, you exhale deeply at the movements of his soft lips, wet tongue and hungry teeth mixed with his knuckles that keep fondling your waist at a steady rhythm. You feel your insides quiver, clamp, relax and then release, guiding the wetness to your folds. In harmony with your body’s reaction, you violently exhale Sehun’s name.

“Sshhhht”, Sehun whispers in your ear to remind you to be quiet and continues on. You’re both still in the library, after all; there are people down there. Temporary, he lets go of one hand on your waist to pull the zipper on the back of your dress downwards, but only slightly. He’s providing himself better access to your neck and shoulders, finding a second soft spot that makes you bite back a moan.

“We should go somewhere else”, you breathe, desiring more of him. For a second, you believe you can take the lead and turn around to kiss him intensely, but Sehun holds you in your place so you can’t move. Alternatively, he grinds his bulge against you as payback, making you lose control over your breathing. He’s extremely hard.

“Open your eyes”, Sehun orders you and you gasp for air when you do. Not only passer-by’s but also people on the other balcony, the one on the opposite side of the library, are able to see you, should one decide to search for a book there. You are experiencing a cocktail of feelings; arousal, desire, fear and anxiousness. He’s having your mind in the gutter.  

“Feel that?”, Sehun asks, his digits now back on both sides of your waist, his index and middle finger slowly lifting your dress up. “It’s called adrenaline”, he whispers and kisses the most sensitive soft spot you have in your neck. “It keeps you awake-”, he says raw and traces his fingers upwards on your thighs. “and can last for hours”, Sehun glides one of his hands over your panties to the centre above your core. “There’s nothing-”, he sinks his hand into your panties without warning and dips two of his fingers between your folds, reaching your clit. “a good fuck can’t fix”, he groans in your ear.

Involuntarily, you release an audible moan and close your eyes again. Sehun uses his free hand to guide your jaw towards him so he can kiss you lustfully, his fingers now hunting for the right rhythm, pressure and movements that will drive you insane. He guides himself by the way he feels you tremble in his chest, how sloppy your kisses become and how the vibration of your breathing increases vigorously.

“Fuck baby, you’re so wet” Sehun murmurs. You crave Sehun so badly, you can’t believe you’re unable to subdue your thoughts and are acting with audacity. At this rate, you’re putting your hopes on him to keep an eye out for passer-by’s. You can’t focus on them anymore, you can only focus on Sehun. On you, in you; you need him. What has he done to you? You moan. “You’re so responsive, you’re driving me crazy” he whispers. “The filthy things you make me want to do to you”.

You let out a small cry when he slides his fingers into your core, his thumb taking over the clit work. He thrusts with them at a steady pace, but one that differs from the pace he’s holding over your clit. You arch your back, your head crushing harder into Sehun’s shoulder. You try to hold your moans to a minimum, but by now you’ve given up on trying to withhold from the heavy and unsteady breathing. It is simply impossible.

Sehun grinds his hardness against you once more and you can’t resist letting out a moan. “Sehun” You manage to alleviate it only a bit.

“Yes baby?” he whispers and he starts sucking a hickey on your neck. With his free hand, he now roams over one of your breasts, kneading eagerly. Despite the multitasking, Sehun doesn’t lose track of the rhythm he’s working on your core and clit. You’re growing closer to reach your high by the second, your breathing transitioning to low whines as the new standard. “You want to cum?”

You try to nod but your body is out of your control already, so you try to whine a silent yes in between. When Sehun catches your plea, he increases his speed and tries to deepen his finger-thrusts on you. A few thrusts in and you reach your high. You scar your lip, biting on it to withhold your moans but they partially still manage to escape through your teeth.

Sehun’s grip on you loosens and you turn around, claiming those hungry kisses you’ve been wanting to steal from him before. Maybe out of desire, maybe out of gratitude that you do so, probably both.

“Baby, your ass is perfect”, Sehun says as he lets his hands caress the rounds of your butt cheeks. He traces them down to move under your dress for the second time, this time locking two of his fingers at the sides of your panties, a finger at each side. Gently, he pushes downward until your panties find their own way to the floor of the book column.

You are getting impatient. For some reason you think Sehun’s slacking off and he needs to understand that you’ve only got twenty minutes to recharge, so you decide to use that time wisely. You start fiddling with his jeans, unhooking the button faster than even Sehun would expect you to be able to. He smirks at the eagerness and quickly helps you. If it wasn’t for him being in the library, he would get rid of his pants completely, but he has to make do with the pants hanging loose on his hips and his erection pulled out of his underwear.

Sehun can’t wait to quench your thirst for him and he lifts you by your thighs, fastening you onto his hips. He makes a one hundred and eighty degree turn, locking you in between him and the end of the column wall. He knows time is precious so he doesn’t even seek for your approval, he knows he has it, and lines himself up before thrusting into you hard. You bite on the same bruise on your lip to withhold your moans routinely.

“Fuck, you’re tight”, Sehun groans and starts to move his hips. You try to meet him with yours but that isn’t as easy as you’d expect, squished between both him and the wall. One of your arms rests over his shoulders whilst the other greedily fists his hair. You haven’t been able to take a glance at his length, but you can tell its thick by how you feel your core stretch for him.  

With every thrust, your body adapts to him, allowing him to ease in and out more pleasurably each time. You try to control your breathing, focusing solely on that and one spot below where he leisurely torments you. You’re even too enthralled by all the sensations to realize you both let out a groan at the exact same time.

“Faster”, you plead and Sehun adheres to your request instantly. He thrust deeper, harder, faster and you soon find your mouth on Sehun’s shoulder, hoping to suppress your moans that way. Your entire body feels warm and you try to cling onto Sehun harder. The feeling of fulfilment is mind-boggling.

“You’re so much better. Than I imagined”, Sehun says between thrusts. “Fucking. Good”. “You feel so. Freaking. Good”, he repeats. Your body is wounding tight, craving release. Sehun notices this by how you’re trying everything you can to keep your moans in check so that they’re not too loud, but he’s facing the same problems himself so he forgets to encourage you to keep it down. “You’re. Such. A. good. Girl”.

“Sehun”, you cry silently. It’s another plea.

“I know baby. Hold on just a little longer”, he says and now solely hits all the right spots.

“Please!” you cry once more and a thrust later, you bite on his shoulder. An explosion erupts in you and your groan is still audible despite your efforts. Your walls clench around Sehun and he rides out your high, trying his best not to cry out himself from the perfect pain and pleasure combination you’re giving him. Your body is now being relentless with him, too.

“Ooh, (y/n), fuck!”, Sehun breathes heavily, riding out his own high. He pulls out afterwards, brushing his nose against your face that is still nuzzled into his shoulder. You jerk your head up to face him, his cheeks visibly flushed like you imagine yours to be.

“You did really well”, he compliments you, still holding you up between him and the wall. There’s a certain innocence in your eyes that tempts him to kiss you slowly and passionately. He knows he has been very dominant and rough with you. You might not be in love with him, nevertheless you welcome his kiss wholeheartedly. You agree that it’s a perfect way to end your small adventure.

You pull away slowly, flashing Sehun a smile, when suddenly, you let out a loud scream as you jump off Sehun. Your scream is so loud, that there’s no doubt the three hundred people in the study hall below hear it. At the end of the column, you see a dark, short-haired guy looking at you and Sehun.

Sehun turns around and witnesses the guy run away, then starts laughing.

“What, this isn’t funny”, You panic. “He saw us!”

“Don’t worry, that’s my friend Kyungsoo. He won’t tell anybody”, he assures you and caresses your arm to calm you down.

“You!” You give his chest a lazily push, slightly annoyed that he doesn’t mind as much as you do. You grab your panties, put them on quickly and then start making your way back to your table.

“Hey”, Sehun calls you before you reach the balcony. You turn around, giving him the attention he’s asking for. “I really enjoyed it”, he says softly. You smile. You’ve never dreamed of doing something like this before. You realize that some people might’ve caught you both, but you feel that for once, it was worth it.

“So did I”, you beam back.

“If you want, I’m in search for a new study buddy”, Sehun hints at you.

“Thought you had one? He has lots of water”, you point out.

“Yeah… well… I mean a study buddy for at home?” He tries again.

“I’ll think about it”, you smile and turn on your heel. One minute left. Four tiers down. This is going to be the sprint of a lifetime.  Fighting!

#sehun scenario #sehun smut #exo smut #exo scenario #kpop smut #kpop scenario #sehun #oh sehun #exo sehun #exo scenarios #sehun fanfic #sehun fanfiction #oh sehun smut

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Should I write it, too?

Hi everyone!

How’ve you all been? I’m trying to get rid of a very bad cold, spending my days in bed, sometimes asleep, sometimes awake, mostly half asleep - which is the scariest thing ever because my dreams seem way too realistic when I’m only half asleep-. 

I’ve got a question. There’s this idea that’s been playing around in my head for about a month now... It would be a new story (next to my Renegade story) and now that I’m ill, it’s kinda taking my mind prisoner. I can’t get it out. 

So I’m wondering. Should I write it? Without telling too much about the story in itself, here’s the info:

Pairing: Suho x Reader (x Kyungsoo later on)

Type: Romance, Drama, Angst, Too realistic and depressing for your own good

Title: Till death do us part

General warning: Might shred your heart in tiny pieces during the entire thing, over and over again.

The summary that basically tells you nothing: When Suho tells his fiancee how he cruelly broke up with his first love (Reader), she encourages him to find her and right the wrongs of the past. Finding her, his life takes a drastic turn when he learns what he left her with. 

Writing: More book-like than Renegade, 3rd person, Suho point of view (since that’s more interesting. Different from Renegade though since Renegade also holds a mystery for the (y/n) person which would not be the case here).

So, should I write it?

#till death do us part

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I just wanna say wow your writing is so good and i love chanyeol's stories even tho i havent finished yet but i will!! please make more i lovE YOur style, its so unique,, hopefully one day i get to request something? ;)) take your time hun we love you

Thank you honey! Time is vital in my writing - well eh… procrastrination is lol-

When I have the feeling a chapter is going to be boring AF, I just let it lay there for a few days, think back to it regularly and then suddenly *poof* there’s this wonderful miracle that happens! An idea that pops up in my head that is just the ultimate perfection and it makes so much goddamn sense that I wonder why I didn’t think of that before. This is why everyone needs to wait longer sometimes haha.

I got the same thing with chapter 5 again a few days ago. This is why I’ll never try to rush the thinking of the story, but I do rush the writing! From that particular new idea there’s one little thing I’m contemplating of now and it feels like a choice between ‘blood, sand or salt’, but I hope to find something better. Once it’s all beautifully shaped in my mind, I want to get it to my readers asap.

Right now, I’m working out an Angst named Bittersweet while I keep chewing on that last idea before I continue writing on Renegade. At my writing in Renegade, I’m at that part where that new idea needs to be added and somehow I can’t write the later parts without writing that first uuggggghhhh. I have to write in chronological order, I don’t know why, but I have to *personal struggles*

(For those who want more info on how Procrastination works, this man explains it amazingly, he’s spot on: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fxbCHn6gE3U ). 

Also sweetie, it’s not because I don’t have a request box for stories or something displayed on my page saying requests are open/closed, that you can’t ask me for a story. Send me your request, let me procrastinate on it for a while and I’ll bring it to you, agreed? ^^ If you believe I’m the writer to work out your story as you imagine it, then I will be honored to do so for you. 

And this answer is so long again, sorry, I really can’t help it

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I really love that in every ask you give a detailed answer you deserve the best ~

It’s a handicap. A writer’s handicap…

My manager at work often asks me to give her the summary of mails where she’s in CC and I’ve responded: “Give me the summary” (10 sentences is a lot, for my manager).

And my co-worker is like: “You explained that very well, but you wrote an entire book again”. “As long as the end user gets it"

At least I’ve gotten some people to understand the problem because I’m not lousy to give them a complete explanation!

#maelströmlove

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Okay but you deserve more followers😭👏🏼 Renegade is so refreshing ❤ I love it I can't wait for the new chap

I only started a month or two ago. Other fanfiction writers have build their way up, too. All things considered, with one ongoing story and one smut out, I currently have 242 followers (it increases quite quickly). I believe that’s an achievement in itself already.

What I consider to be a very important factor in my writing is that I do it for myself. Sometimes I fiddle fifteen minutes with two sentences so I have a smooth ‘overflow’ between them (e.g.: Going from Fact-telling to story-telling, I hate it when the ‘jump’ is too obvious. I want you to go ‘Oh wait I’m already back at the story and I haven’t even realised it’. ). I’m pretty sure most of my readers don’t care that much, but I do. 

Followers in itself can’t be my only motivation. They help though, I admit! When I feel stuck to start writing again, I also read comments to motivate me and that gives me the final nudge to get to it. Once I’m in it, I never encounter a problem though. I motivate myself with all writing challenges my own story throws at me!

Now, I’m working out the details of the segments of both chapter 5 and 6. For these I’m certain it’s much better if I first plan both of them completely, otherwise I may run into trouble.

Funny what an idea can do when you’re driving to work on a Monday morning. The main idea of the story I had within a day or two haha.

#maelströmlove #scenarioasks #renegadeasks

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When he ran away I was like WHAT?! But then it was like oh they were just kissing so I think your way of writing is awesome, I can't wait for the new chapter😭❤🕺🏻

Nah, there was definitely something else happening down there!(y/n)’snails pinched into Chanyeol’s back as she held on to him closely, her heavybreaths aligned perfectly to Chanyeol’s movements. Withthe same frequency, his mind flooded with the thoughts of how much he lovedthis girl he was being intimate with …

Maybe I should’ve put ‘back and forth movements’? I hoped the ‘intimate’ would cover it. Errrrr… 

My readers all suffering together with me for the new chapters. For me to write them, for you to wait for them haha. I like looking at it like this. All suffering together!

#maelströmlove #scenarioasks #renegadeasks

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Please don't hold back in the smut, Show your creativity without restrictions🌞 ~

You mean in Chapter 4 of Renegade? I held back there because the emphasis had to be on the whole marking thing. I also think I’d kill the writer…*reads elaborate written smut scene when all of a sudden*“SORRY!” *Chanyeol runs away*ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?! Like no orgasm nothinggggggg~ How dare you!!!!

I’ll leave the smut for the one-shot smut works or dedicated smut-chapters haha. Also, it’s a new couple that’s having sex for the second time. Not much interesting is going to happen. 

In my story I write what’s important to the story, and sometimes that means cutting out smut or -what I’ve had to do a lot already-, killing darlings (writers term). Everything for the greater good of the story.

While writing Punish me, I made myself a smut writing guideline (yeah I’m that much of an analyst). And although Punish me smut happened in a bedroom, point 9 of my guideline says this:

9.GET OUT OF THE BEDROOM

I haveoccupied myself with ‘analysing’ what women like to read in smut and one ofthose things is locations. You will notice that the bedroom is a lot lesspopular and women like more challenging locations such as the CEO’s office, thekitchen and even that small space between the two sinks in the toilets of thatdancing club. Same for the situations that cause your characters to haveintercourse. Think outside the women ‘reality box’. Take the sex elsewhere. Letthat hot nerd finally find his inner Casanova and fuck you in the University’slibrary. 

So the next smut I’ll write, will definitely not happen in a bedroom :)

I hope this answer satisfies you as well!

#maelströmlove #scenarioasks #renegadeasks